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As well as being old, rather evil, and having a personal hygiene problem, the Dark Lord was also somewhat of a chauvinist, and he assumed that if women tried to take charge of the country, it would fail drastically because the women would spend all their time gossiping and shopping. His plan was doomed to fail from the start, though. He hadn't counted on Hermione ``Granger.

Words: 3,018
Chapters: 1
Hits: 794

Narcissa Black was NEVER cruel and vain. In fact, in spite of her beauty, Narcissa is just a down-to-earth genuine girl who has some problems. Fine, a lot of problems! This is her diary, which gives you a glimpse into her life and witness as she goes from accident to accident.

Words: 1,811
Chapters: 1
Hits: 786

Harry and his friends go to a new theme park for wizards, Wizardland, where a spell makes some stupid - like Draco who drags poor Lucius around until he spazzes out on roller coaster and winds up talking to an argyle leprechaun that smokes.

Words: 2,331
Chapters: 1
Hits: 786

2004. Voldemort reigns supreme as Minister of Magic, and Harry, Ron and Hermione live in a squalid London flat on the Dole. Remus Lupin sleeps on their couch after his wife leaves him for another woman, Lavender Brown is a cheesy porno actress, Draco Malfoy has seen 'Secretary' one too many times and Snape runs a meth lab in his backyard. However, a gormless teenage girl in Coon Falls, Minnesota, opens up an interesting chat window and starts conversing with the supposedly late Sirius Black, and the Order of the Phoenix (now known as the Paradise Cult of Christ to avoid suspicion) rears its head for a tour-de-force overthrow of the cruel Riddle-Malfoy government....

Words: 11,314
Chapters: 3
Hits: 784

Hogwarts is having a fashion show. Guess who has to make comments about the 'outfits' in his 'own' way.

Words: 960
Chapters: 1
Hits: 784

You must read this parody, especially if you like seafood! It started as a normal morning at Hogwarts, then all hell broke loose. Featuring Confused!Ron and Insane!Harry. Sarcasm abounds, you'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll see Crabbe in leather pants, and find out Voldemort's true weakness. Features homage to LOTR, Princess Bride, Last of The Mohicans and many more. Co-Authored by Cindale and Ginnysdarkside.

Words: 2,753
Chapters: 1
Hits: 783

The new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, Eudice Eusyram, is perfect, and now Snape is jealous! How will he get back at her? A spoof on Mary Sue fan fiction in the same mold as "Airplane!"

Words: 1,238
Chapters: 1
Hits: 781

What happens when two students overhear Snape and Sprout's conversation in the teachers' lounge?

Words: 2,391
Chapters: 1
Hits: 773

How many ships can one offend in one story? Let's see...an irreverent look at shipping before HbP.

Words: 2,641
Chapters: 1
Hits: 771

What happens when Harry, Hermione, Ginny, and Ron end up in the land of the cyclops? How did they get there? How do they get out of there? Harry Potter version of The Odyssey.

Words: 1,626
Chapters: 2
Hits: 767

Sue’ing where it ain’t never been Sue’d before! Charity Dagrun Gryon transfers to Hogwarts for sixth year; and seems awfully familiar with a place she’s never been before. Through a series of dreams it’s revealed to her she must go through the Veil to rescue the Founders of Hogwarts, and after that, everything goes horribly wrong. Time paradoxes like you’ve never seen before! Also featuring: the Malfoys as demons from across the Veil, Destinyless!Harry, Abused!Draco and Sir Gloat-A-Lot Slytherin. A must read for everyone who wants a break from the serious Sue!

Words: 2,041
Chapters: 2
Hits: 764

The title says it all. This is a parody of the classic Monty Python Dead Parrot sketch...

Words: 943
Chapters: 1
Hits: 763
Ginny and Draco by Snooty Bob
05/08/2005

Two houses, both alike in honour and tradition. In the fair castle of Hogwarts, where we lay our scene, an ancient grudge breaks out into open hostility. When wizard blood makes wizard hands unclean a pair of star-crossed lovers take their lives.

Words: 4,612
Chapters: 1
Hits: 762

Rita Skeeter meets Weird Al Yankovic's song "Watching Too Much Jerry Springer". The result? Total chaos!

Words: 4,326
Chapters: 1
Hits: 760

Post-OoP. When Lord Voldemort receives a mysterious package, the wizarding world is never the same. Total parody of HP fics, featuring: Angst!Harry, Slash!Lucius, Penitent!Voldie, & everyone's favorite, Mary Sue. Not to mention Evil!Floof.

Words: 1,290
Chapters: 1
Hits: 758
As You Wish by Darth Stitch
10/20/2005

A slashy send-up/spoof of The Princess Bride featuring Harry Potter and Severus Snape. Guess who's the Bride?

Words: 8,978
Chapters: 2
Hits: 756

Parody. Liek, ’Mia comes back to hogwars one September and is liek TOTALLY different and has her heart set on a special someone!!!111 How will the others react? Wait and see!!

Words: 2,408
Chapters: 1
Hits: 756

A covert operation is launched to retrieve Voldemort from Muggledom. But what do you call an operation that involves the hormonal saviour of wizardkind, his adenoidal comic side-kick, and their thinking hat wannabe bimbette; a harmless (mostly) werewolf, his canine friend and their clumsy associate; a snivelly wizard and a known felon? Surely,

Words: 4,810
Chapters: 2
Hits: 753

This is Monsters Inc, HP style! Draco is Randall, Harry is Sulley, Ron is Mike, and Hermione is Boo! Also featuring various cameo appearances! Just look on in!

Words: 678
Chapters: 1
Hits: 747

Robin Leach does a Life Styles of the Rich and Famous episode on The Riddle House, and is thoroughly delighted by its contents. Featuring "Eeeevil" ice skates and a surprise appearance by Lucius Malfoy wearing and doing something so sinfully delicious, I can’t list it here. PLUS an enlightening conversation about the Truffle Shuffle. Come and see the home of “Bad Boy of the Wizarding World”

Words: 1,335
Chapters: 1
Hits: 744

SLASH! PARODY! Vampire!Draco is on the prowl. But will his whooping cough prevent him from seducing The Boy Who Lived?

Words: 659
Chapters: 1
Hits: 739

James decides to hold a party. But Peter sees dead people, Remus has a revelation, Sirius is easily distracted, and Lily seems to speak only in questions. What will their reaction be to the announcement he's about to make?

Words: 1,735
Chapters: 1
Hits: 739

Harry goes to visit Ron at the Burrow. In his time at the house, Harry finds letters stashed in various places in the house that reveal Ron's true feelings for Hermione. Will Harry be violently sick? Will he be traumatised for the rest of his life? Read this and see...

Words: 4,458
Chapters: 2
Hits: 735

The my newest works from Chicago. Both parodies, one more of a songfic, one funny and truthful. Umbridge and Fudge sing about what to do with Dumbledore. Ron wonders if he'll ever measure up to those around him.

Words: 905
Chapters: 1
Hits: 735

Picture only this... Lockhart serenading Snape to the tune of "Rubber Ducky" in his birthday suit. Scared yet?

Words: 687
Chapters: 1
Hits: 733

What do the under-used characters do when they are not sitting at the high table, handing out homework, or catching students involved in mind-boggling carnal acts? Here is their answer to that question.

Words: 2,956
Chapters: 1
Hits: 733

What happens when MTV decides to prank the wizarding world for their game show Boiling Points?

Words: 1,045
Chapters: 1
Hits: 729

Mary-Sue Potter has come to Hogwarts, inspiring questions: Who is she? What's her secret? And why doesn't she have violet eyes? (Parody)

Words: 1,316
Chapters: 1
Hits: 727

It\'s Hermione Granger\'s turn to take up the quill and to write her own confession. There are some things you certainly did not know about Hogwarts\' bushy-haired prodigy.

Words: 1,379
Chapters: 1
Hits: 726

Scene: the Black family home. Harry is sitting at the kitchen table perusing a copy of the Daily Prophet, scratching Crookshanks between the ears whilst he stands on top of the table enjoying a saucer of milk.``The front-page headline of the Daily Prophet reads: There is no news to report. There will be no news to Report tomorrow either. There will be no news to report until the publication of book six. thank you for keeping your subscription current with us anyway.``Harry (muttering quietly to himself while he sips his tea): No news is good news. (He turns the page) I wonder what the personal ads will say. Oh, here’s one from Fred and George.

Words: 2,015
Chapters: 1
Hits: 725

It's Christmas at Hogwarts, and some of the students can't help singing. Five Gryffindors and a couple of Slytherins get mixed up in Bohemian Rhapsody whilst figuring out their own problems.

Words: 2,952
Chapters: 1
Hits: 725
Fifty-nine by magicgalkairi
05/24/2006

There are just so many detention fics that result in Harry and Draco getting together. They argue, they fight, they get together. It’s always the same thing. So here’s my little story about their 59th detention together and what it resulted in.

Words: 980
Chapters: 1
Hits: 722
Like a Virgin by FayJay
07/27/2005

Hermione needs Neville to help her with the ingredients to a very special spell.

Words: 792
Chapters: 1
Hits: 717

This is absolute parody, and was written well before "half-blood prince" was announced as book six's title. A house-elf from South London? Illegal whiskey production? And what in the world are Sunless Wizards? Welcome to the weirdest AU ever...

Words: 1,951
Chapters: 1
Hits: 716
Macho Man by GLEH
02/20/2003

A songfic to "Macho Man" by The Village People... Draco as a biker, Ron as a soldier, Blaise as an Indian, Neville as a construction worker, Harry as a policeman and Dean as a cowboy. ``And despite all the little jokes in here, none of them are gay! Well, perhaps Neville is. :P The guys get together at the end of their seventh year and give a show for some of the girls at Hogwarts.

Words: 1,605
Chapters: 1
Hits: 713

Sequel to The Twelve Days of Christmas. Ron faces the consequences of singing his...er... song. Includes the Return of the King, I mean, potted plants, mobs, T.V. characters, oh, and a little part where AmethystPhoenix is punished. Random, insane... what do you think?

Words: 2,213
Chapters: 1
Hits: 709

What would you do on your last night on Earth? What happens when it turns out not to be your last night?

Words: 7,042
Chapters: 1
Hits: 704

A crazed fanfic author makes fun of ships. Snogging ensues.

Words: 830
Chapters: 1
Hits: 702

This may be the most insane thing you've ever read in your life. Dumbledore has gone missing and it's up to the residents of Hogwarts to find him. Features: Prostitute!Hermione Rhyming!Neville Dumb!Ron Paranoid!Harry Sexy!Draco Missing!Dumbledore

Words: 3,104
Chapters: 1
Hits: 702

Harry Potter, the humorous hero with ADD, comes back to Hogwarts for his sixth year. He joins Dumbledore in the path to discover the mystery of Voldemort. He buys things from Chicken Vila. He even plays golf!

Words: 14,614
Chapters: 1
Hits: 697

Sometimes, a normal story just isn't what it’s cracked up to be. Sometimes all you’re looking for is something different. Well this story is That Something. From the creators of 'I'm Having Problems With My Pants' has sprouted this terrifically uncanny tale that will leave you moaning for more and scratching for seeds. Minus the seeds part that is. Strap on your seat belt and get ready to experience sexually pent-up teenage love at its very finest!

Words: 2,314
Chapters: 1
Hits: 697

What happens when you give wizards and witches a computer game? They freak! Hermione and Percy argue and cuss. (Rated PG-13 for language and adult stuff)

Words: 957
Chapters: 1
Hits: 696

Voldemort is up to his old antics again. Harry learns a number of potentially unpleasant truths about his past. And what is Hermione doing with the Big Book of Nefarious Dark Wizard Plotting Devices, anyway?

Words: 2,790
Chapters: 2
Hits: 692

Harry's wand is misbehaving and getting him into embarrassing situations. Can he fix it before he gets into too much trouble? Or will he be caught in the act?

Words: 3,100
Chapters: 1
Hits: 690

Albus Dumbledore has everything under control. Find out how he does it in this little tale.

Words: 1,706
Chapters: 1
Hits: 690

AU, Post-DH. The war is over and a miraculous revival has occurred, but not everyone is happy about it. Find out what happened, who wants things to be as they were in canon, and why in this twisted parody of a familiar scenario.

Words: 1,566
Chapters: 1
Hits: 689

After the war Harry traded his life in the UK for life in the US. Now he appears in the news in Britain and the States for his lavish and sometimes outrageous lifestyle. What can his old friends do to get their friend back?

Words: 1,921
Chapters: 2
Hits: 688

During a bout of temporary insanity (caused by a totally unexpected reaction between pumpkin juice and a cough lolly), Harry inadvertently conjures the Evil.

Words: 2,855
Chapters: 2
Hits: 687

Witch Weekly reporter Roberta Roberts interviews Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter for a special feature. Short and silly slashfic.

Words: 1,281
Chapters: 1
Hits: 686

This fic is AU under the guidelines set down in the FictionAlley fanfictional decrees. It has been approved by the Ministry of Silly Walks due to the inclusion of a Mr Riddle, and the Aurors' Office due to an unfortunate potions accident. Extremely cliched.

Words: 845
Chapters: 1
Hits: 685

After Hermione's visit to her American cousin in America, Hermione is... different. Can Ron and Harry save her from her new self before she does something stupid, like Draco Malfoy? *A Draco/Hermione parody and obviously AU*

Words: 2,957
Chapters: 1
Hits: 684

One-Shot. Lily, James, Sirius and Severus appear on Clive Anderson's version of the comedy show Whose Line Is It Anyways? Warning: this story contains lots of laughing and evil glaring.

Words: 1,314
Chapters: 1
Hits: 682
School of Duels by RJLupin
02/12/2006

Gilderoy Lockhart's classes at Hogwarts based on School of Rock. Lockhart bored everyone with talking about himself, but when he found out that Harry and Draco were potential duelers, he stopped teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts, and made the class about dueling instead. Now the class is going to lead Lockhart's new idea for a Dueling Club. But with the way Lockhart teaches, will it be more of a hazard than a help?

Words: 3,265
Chapters: 2
Hits: 678

Two fics in one!! "Ginny" - Ginny does a parody of the song "Roxie" from the movie "Chicago." ``"When You're Good to Minerva..." - Minerva McGonagall does a parody of the song "When You're Good to Mama" from the movie "Chicago."

Words: 524
Chapters: 1
Hits: 673
Once Again by Melusina
05/05/2006

Harry has a really, really bad day.

Words: 2,419
Chapters: 1
Hits: 671

Sittting alone in the Gryffindor common room one night, Hermione Granger recieves a most unusual letter from Professor Severus Snape. A sort of parody fic containing implied slash.

Words: 1,242
Chapters: 1
Hits: 665

When Hermione gets sick of Draco's cruel jokes, she and Ginny hatch a plan. She agrees to go out with him for ten days, and be the worst girlfriend possible. What this know-it-all doesn't know is that Draco has a bet going himself. He has to make her fall in love with him in ten days. Who will win? Who sucks at writing summaries? I DO!! A parody of How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days.

Words: 1,920
Chapters: 1
Hits: 663

Some stories were omitted from the Canon. I'd like to say these are them, but to tell the truth... these are just rants of my odd little imagination. *twilight zone-esque music starts here*

Words: 2,733
Chapters: 2
Hits: 659
Firewhiskey by Zeva Lobo
01/02/2006

The Hogwarts professors decide to have a party, with alcohol, and Peeves isn't about to be left out of the fun. One-shot, complete, utterly insane.

Words: 1,440
Chapters: 1
Hits: 655

Love spell goes wrong in Hogwarts. Who will be whose *****?``Set in the sixth year.

Words: 4,264
Chapters: 1
Hits: 654

Hermione's got a baby -- and a secret. Snape has Paternity Issues. But in this little parody, nothing is what -- or who -- you think.

Words: 711
Chapters: 1
Hits: 654

What happens when two pairs of lovers, a group of crazed and unseasoned actors, and a magical night in the forest with the "fairies" are combined? Why, Shakespeare's

Words: 5,283
Chapters: 2
Hits: 651

One day while poor Harry was bored, Ron farted and Adam Sandler came out of the fireplace with a MAD magazine. Join Harry while he reads this mag with much difficulty.

Words: 1,097
Chapters: 1
Hits: 650
Sarah Sue by URCAAH
10/10/2003

Sarah has written a fanfiction. It has ``everything: the ever-popular Mary Sue (aka Bethany Parker) and Sarah’s two best friends instead as Bethany’s sworn enemies. Unfortunately for Sarah, though, Bethany doesn't like the life she's created. Bethany wants out, ``and the three friends aren't going to like how she gets it!

Words: 3,213
Chapters: 2
Hits: 650
Cliché? No way! by Rachel
04/08/2003

Dracos parents die in the grocery store when canned peaches massively attack them, so where does Draco go? None other than the Weasley home. PG-13 for violent stupidness.

Words: 1,213
Chapters: 1
Hits: 650

Salinas Dumbledore has graduated from school and has returned to her native Newfoundland for a solitary night on the town at the infamous George St. in St. John's. She doesn't expect to find a certain someone in there... but when she does, a karaoke-riddled drink-off ensues! Newfie Music! Drunken Raves! Cursing! Swearing! Screech! Things Newfies Only Do On TV! And best of all, GREAT BIG SEA!

Words: 1,719
Chapters: 1
Hits: 648

You thought you knew what the prophesy was? Well... you were right. But what if it wasn't that? What if it had a lot more to do with Harry's... hair?

Words: 1,791
Chapters: 1
Hits: 648

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone... everyone knows it. Most of us know it word for word. But one person doesn't and is rewriting it... with disastrous results. Fortunately for us, they have a picky beta-reader. The beta-reader always has their two cents worth to say. Who will go insane first--writer or beta-reader? Will the story be mutilated to be nearly unrecognizable?

Words: 1,909
Chapters: 1
Hits: 646
I'm Free Alright by hollie
11/25/2002

Just a song to jlo/nas' 'I'm Gonna Be Alright,' done with Hermione and Snape after Snape goes back to Voldemort and uses Imperius on Hermione.

Words: 691
Chapters: 1
Hits: 645

Everyone is out to get Harry. Thankfully, Harry has the power of love on his side. A parody of the "Harry Potter and the Veil of Mystery" fanfic by Semprini.

Words: 714
Chapters: 1
Hits: 645

One morning, while imprisoned in Azkaban, Lucius, Crabbe Sr., and Goyle Sr. awake to discover the prison empty. They escape and meet many adventures as they attempt to make it home to their families (and beloved Master!). A hilarious parody of O Brother Where Art Thou, filtered through J.K. Rowling's universe.

Words: 5,049
Chapters: 2
Hits: 637

Hey, you asked for it! More awful slash jokes, fandom cliches, and sudden inexplicable OOCness. This time, Seamus is being stalked. Is it the slashers, or someone more sinister, more devious... more squealing?

Words: 754
Chapters: 1
Hits: 630

Join Maria and Susannah at their first year at Hogwarts as they encounter Harry, Dumbledore, and Higgs. If you're looking for an intelligent parody, this is your story. And if you're looking for a dumb parody, this is your story, too.

Words: 4,051
Chapters: 3
Hits: 629

So what happens when I read a deeply moving eleven-chapter story in which Draco and Harry switch bodies and Hermione is a member of a Harry-Draco love triangle? Well... let's call it Draco Dormiens in Fifteen Minutes.

Words: 2,099
Chapters: 1
Hits: 628

This parody follows the adventures of Bel, a typical Mary Sue character, as she encounters Gilderoy Lockhart and other characters (not the typical ones, either), goes to Africa, and has all sorts of odd happenings along the way. Purple prose and double entendres are intelligently, if not innovatively used. Need we remind you, this is a parody. If you lack a sense of humor, enter at your own peril.

Words: 625
Chapters: 1
Hits: 627

Even Death Eaters need to stock up on the necessities sometimes, and Lord Voldemort must provide. So how does the malevolent Dark Lord handle this daunting task? Why, he goes shopping, of course! This is my first fic, and it's very silly and OOC. I hope it makes you laugh!

Words: 3,939
Chapters: 3
Hits: 627

The two Harry Potter universes have merged; The Universe of Fanfiction and the Universe of Canon. One can only imagine the chaos that ensues.

Words: 1,036
Chapters: 1
Hits: 624

American Idol Harry Potter Style! Pointless at first, but will get better. With a hilarious panel of judges, and hilarious songs, not to mention our favorite commentator...

Words: 509
Chapters: 1
Hits: 623

Ever wondered what heroes do when they go too far with trying to rescue people? Well, it turns out...it's an illness called SUPERMAN SYNDROME! And guess what? All our favourite comic book, fictional and television heroes have it! From Buffy to Hellboy to X-Men to Lord of the Rings to Artemis Fowl and even our beloved Harry Potter...come along to the meeting and see them try to sort out their heroism. Rated 'R' for language and random acts of violence.

Words: 3,480
Chapters: 1
Hits: 620

The Weasley twins manage to destroy Voldemort and his Death Eaters? Who could have predicted it? Inspired by Monty Python.

Words: 1,721
Chapters: 1
Hits: 619
High-Heeled Harry by Utopian
05/26/2003

A particularly...um...random story, in which entails a rather insane infatuation with high-heels from our little hero.

Words: 1,070
Chapters: 1
Hits: 618

Why Sirius should never have been allowed to read Edgar Allan Poe. Based loosely on "The Fall of the House of Usher."

Words: 1,306
Chapters: 1
Hits: 618

For Gilderoy Lockhart, there are a few bumps on the road to recovery...

Words: 3,023
Chapters: 1
Hits: 617

This one-shot is from Snape's point-of-view just before the boggart scene in PoA. It's a tribute to all those obsessive vampire theorists.

Words: 1,312
Chapters: 1
Hits: 616

These are filks based on the musical "City of``Angels". Here you can hear Hermione's final words``before she makes the Polyjuice Potion, Neville``complain about his lack of talent, Ron fight with``Hermione over the Yule Ball, Tom Marvolo Riddle gloat``over Harry in the Chamber of Secrets and Moaning``Myrtle croon to Harry in the Prefects' Bathroom. Try``it, you'll like it!

Words: 1,758
Chapters: 1
Hits: 615

A counter-curse botched causes something that really isn't all of anything. Perhaps it's just something that will cause Harry distress! No, it's the Curse of... Proverbs?

Words: 3,458
Chapters: 1
Hits: 611

You probably think of Voldemort and his Death Eaters as terrible, heartless people, and you are normally correct. But for one week every year, they are able to escape the stress of the wizarding world by going on vacation...the Muggle way! Join everyone's favorite antagonists on their annual road trip to the beach, because something tells me this year may be the most exciting yet! Expect OOC behavior and plenty of laughs (at least I hope so)! And just let me warn you beforehand- this is my longest, wackiest and most random fic yet. So let the wackiness begin! Muahahahaha.....

Words: 1,922
Chapters: 2
Hits: 607
Impossible Couples by Trixi
08/04/2004

The Dream Team and their arch-enemy are brought together to discuss the latest fanfics from the Muggles and quietly debate them. Let the sparks fly.

Words: 1,839
Chapters: 1
Hits: 606

It's the film version of Harry's FIRST year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Or at least, how the film SHOULD have been! Welcome to the Madhouse!

Words: 6,251
Chapters: 1
Hits: 605

An answer to a challenge. Featuring: Drunk!Draco, a Wandering Trio, Voldemort, a Feline-Frog, and Discworld's Death

Words: 2,422
Chapters: 1
Hits: 603

There's something strange about Lavender's pet rabbit Binky... (British version)

Words: 602
Chapters: 1
Hits: 599

Harry's gone ghetto, a vicious beast attacks Professor Snape, Voldie's pretty, and Hagrid's untold past is finally told! (For real this time!) Through all of this, Hermione curses the day she was conceived.

Words: 2,700
Chapters: 1
Hits: 598

Voldemort sets out to get his revenge on Snape in an unique way.

Words: 1,568
Chapters: 1
Hits: 596

You've seen the movie (or have you?). Well it doesn't matter, because this fic bears little to no resemblance to the fine picture. I present, therefore, for your amusement, your favorite characters from the "Smoke Two Joints" series taking a mad trip through Diagon Alley. Acid; LSD; Lysergic Acid Diethylamide. Psilocin. Psilocybin. Plenty of Tetrahydrocannabinol, for good measure. Read the fic. Laugh it up. Peace out. ````Rated "R" for some profanity and extreme drug use.

Words: 2,811
Chapters: 1
Hits: 595

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, eating her curds and whey. Along came a spider and sat down beside her and frightened Miss Muffet away. What? I'm sure that spider/acromantula had every right to be there!

Words: 886
Chapters: 1
Hits: 595