4,481 - 4,500 of 5,438 Stories

Harry must answer to the Hogwarts Board of Governors when unusual O.W.L. results bring allegations of cheating!

Follow the young Draco Malfoy during his first year at Hogwarts. Follow him through his adventures, through his matchmaking and his cunning slytherin plans. See the year though his eyes, see the things no one else saw because they where to busy looking at that Potter. Warning! Should not be read by sane people. We wrote this only for the sake of our madness, and if you expect just the slightest trace of reason in it, you will be disappointed. You have been warned.

Romilda Vane: girly, flippant, and catty. What happens when she needs a favour from Luna Lovegood? Certainly, Romilda never expected to get her come-uppance for tormenting the school's infamous Loony! Set during HBP, and written for the Broken Quill challenge.

Poor Draco Malfoy receives temporary amnesia when he meets Potter in the corridor. When Snape comes across him later on, he is in an odd predicament.

Excerpt: "Eskimo girl, won't you come out tonight, come out tonight, come out tonight?" Ron sang to himself as he made his way outside into the two foot deep snow (and it was still snowing). "Wohoo!" Ron rolled around in the bitter cold for maybe three minutes before he had to come back in to get some more clothes on. "I almost forgot to put on my lucky underwear!" he shouted as he came back in and ran up the Grand Staircase to the Gryffindor Tower...

A idle conversation between two Death Eaters. Slash warning--precisely what would give away the ending. (Poor Lucius.)

This is my take on how the FINAL showdown between our hero Harry and that evil serpent Voldemort will happen! I've been told it's funny... but then again, I'm justifiably insane, so don't hold anything you read against me!

It's Hermione's birthday and she has got some really thoughtful gifts - or so she thinks! Soon, the gifts show their true colors and, well, you've got to read the rest!

Crazy random things! In the form of a note-to-self tape, this 'day in the life' extends to really encompasing all of Hedwig's deepest and darkest moments. Overall, a touching story, and a real tear jerker. Damn pigeons...

Sirius drops in to visit Harry. They talk about a lot of random stuff, from Muggle television to anime to Being Gay. This is a good example of why never to obey the impulse to jump up and scribble down half-dreams at three a.m.

Ron finally loses at chess, and against a most unusual opponent.

Peeves the Poltergeist gives us a brief history and explanation about who he is, and why he does his job so well.

Malfoy hexed Ron: now he's obsessive-compulsive. How will Harry and Hermione resolve the problem? Button fixing, making faces in food, and book-straightening. Idea primarily from Monk, on USA. (TV show)

Insane version of MWPP, set entirely in the wrong time line. Not to be taken cereal (seriously), or with medication.``Prepare to meet: Loony Loppy Lupin, Peteranna, Cereal and Antler-boy!

Hermione gives Ron an enchanted alarm clock to get him up to study. But that boy could sleep through anything! Just a some silliness and a hint of R/H.

Ever seen Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Well, if you have you know how it ended. If it really had an end. Because the story does continue. In Harry Potter style.

Draco's parents call him down to the drawing room one afternoon in August for a "chat," and he grudgingly obliges, unaware that this is one afternoon that will turn out like no other...

Dudley enjoys a nice hot dog, when someone comes along to put a claim on his lunch.... Short and silly.

Harry Potter discovers the world of electronics--and fandom!! Watch while he slowly becomes a FictionAlley addict! (once the author regains some semblance of sanity).

In their work for the Order of the Phoenix, Snape and Sirius must confront their deepest fear... together.

What happens when Harry, Ron, and Hermione go to a Muggle high school? In America at that! Will Ron ever figure out how to act in front of the Muggles? Will they survive their first math class?

Sirius wants a holiday in the wilderness, and Dung manages to borrow a cottage deep inside the forests of northern Sweden. Will the two friends manage to stay there alone for three days without killing each other? Not likely - so they decide to spend Friday night in the nearby village.

The Abduction of the Seraglio, starring Harry and Draco. AU - well, sort of.

It's always been hard for Harry to share his feelings. But now tensions are running high between Ginny and Harry. Harry might be cheating on Ginny, but how can she really be sure? H/G fluff

It may not be Christmas Day, yet the reaction of everyone's least favourite Potions professor isn't any less "Bah Humbug." Severus Snape is determined to avoid attention this Valentine's Day, yet a certain someone is as least as determined to bestow it upon him. What is the identity of his secret admirer? Set during Harry Potter's second year.

Blaise isn’t like the other seven-year-old boys Draco knows. Blaise has pink arm bands, whereas Ron and Vincent and Gregory and Draco all have orange ones, but what sort of boy is Blaise like?

Harry is leaving. Draco is on a mission to find out why everyone keeps dumping him. No, it isn't a midlife crisis thing. Probably. Maybe. He's barely thirty, anyway. There's a lot of music, too. And some random store clerks. This is a three-part story.

Last time we saw our hero, he was falling behind the veil. The question that is on everybody’s lips is: Where is he now? Petunia Dursley doesn’t care; all she wants is some apricot jam.

What happens when Gilderoy Lockhart overhears two guards at St. Mungo's talking about human cloning? He finds a solution to the problem that has plagued him his whole life (even though he only remembers the past two years). Rated PG for a smoochy. L/L (Lockhart/Lockhart) Remember - Elevator Music is Sexy!

This begins as a kindly intended parody of the “late night snack” variety of light romance. As such, Harry and Hermione initially will be OOC, a rascal and a shrew respectively, but a very happy romantic ending will result. Special warnings both for sexual/anatomical innuendo and to food fetishists; sorry, the pumpkin pie and whipped cream will be eaten only, with ordinary utensils, and will not be worn!

Percy is understandably leery at the prospect of a bachelor party planned by George. The latest of the Weasley brothers to marry, Percy asks them all a question burning in his mind during a serious moment: how did you know she was "the one"? A one-shot companion to George & Annie: an Unofficial Biography. George/OC, all other ships canon compliant.

She is a normal girl, with a past not even she knows about. All she remembers, though she never told, is that of her years from eleven and up. Everything seems normal to her for so long until she got a group of friends, an enemy, and faced challenges that no one would imagine. The story drags on for a bit, since it adds suspense, but later on you'll understand why I didn't really think about how long it was going to be.

Yet again, Dumbledore's got to hire a Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. This candidate seems... exceptionally underqualified, and yet he's got something unique. A Discworld crossover.

Ron, discovers his calling in life, to become a Bard. After he sings to Hermione, countless times, she begins to have a twitchy eye.

Harry and the gang go to a press conference of Gilderoy Lockhart. ``What's that? He's dead?? GILDEROY LOCKHART IS DEAD? Oh, no! What's a witch to ``do?

Fred and George's Hogwarts years, from their very first trip to Diagon Alley to their infamous final flight from Hogwarts, and everything in between.

Harry must face man's greatest horror . . . purchasing feminine products! Will he get home to Hermione in time? More importantly, will he even get back? Trust me, men, it's not for the faint of heart. Very slight H/Hr ``near the end. Sequel to That Time of Month.

A guide discovered in the library of Malfoy Manor, not that any Malfoy would be caught dead actually reading it...

Wherein my character gets thoroughly confused, and confuses many others.

Professor Snape has a problem class... If other teachers could be as lucky!

An "application essay" by Tom Riddle regarding his Award for Special Services to the School. So earnest. So modest. ... Such a crock.

Severus goes too far and Remus decides to help his friends bid Snape one last fond farewell. WARNING! EXTREME AMOUNTS OF FLUFF AHEAD!

While it\'s very interesting that Harry, Ron, and Hermione are taking off to hunt down Horcruxes, Jimmy Peakes, Ritchie Coote, and Demelza Robins are a bit more concerned with the state of their Quidditch team. After all, without a Seeker and a Keeper, how will they ever win the Quidditch Cup? As they discuss potential replacements, their conversation takes some interesting turns.

If you enjoy crazy stories of gerbils, you'll love this one. Draco gets a gerbil... or two... or a bunch!

With the full moon falling on Christmas Day, Remus plans to spend the holidays alone at Hogwarts and practise his abysmal potions work, while not--in any way, shape, or form--contemplating his attraction to Sirius. Fortunately, nothing ever goes as planned.

It's soon to be Sirius' birthday, the others are throwing him a surprise party. Can they pull it off without him finding out? Can they humiliate Snape in the process? Can white paint ever really come out of robes? Find out the answer to most of these here!

There are killer toilets running amuck. Can they be stopped?

Ever since he turned sixteen, Blaise Zabini has experienced vivid dreams of a brown-haired girl plummeting to her doom. But who is she, and how can Blaise prevent the worst from befalling her?

Harry can’t explain how he feels, or why he’s stealing chances to be around Ginny. Luckily, all Ginny wants him to explain is why he's an idiot.

Neville is feeling depressed and useless. Who's there to help him but Hermione? A very sweet fic where Neville conquers his fears and finds acceptance and true love. Neville/Hermione.

"I was just trying to get to you before you got to me." Harry and Ginny devise a scheme to prevent Ron and Hermione from dancing around each other any more. It won't take you a minute to read.

Welcome to the World of Courtney Carson, a pessimistic fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. After following the terrible trio as an extracurricular activity for four years, Courtney admits she's taking a liking for the famous Harry Potter. Things can't get any worse when she faces one embarassing situation after another, Harry is in steady relationship with her worst enemy, she gets into a row with her best friend, and someone unexpected asks her out.

Ron comes across his old dress robes while rummaging around in his trunk. A debate ensues as to how he actually got them and just who is this Nigel kid?

James Potter gets all bent out of shape when Lily Evans, his three-month girlfriend, gives him a pet name. Good thing his best mate, Sirius Black, is there to set him...well, not straight. Terribly pointless Sirius-James fluff.

Redneck Wizards are alive and well in the American South. Learn to identify them from a safe distance for your own protection!

That was a really wild party.... Ginny Weasley goes to a birthday party for one of her good friends, simply for something to do. Based on a true story.

A mysterious flu has taken over Hogwarts, and Remus dives right into the fever.

Harry must destroy the last of the Horcruxes. This one is the most horrible of them all. It's... it's... it's a cheese cracker? ``Anyway, can Harry destroy the evil cheese cracker? Not without the help of the Siamese Weasels, a hobo, an axe-ridden maniac, his forty-year-old son, and several others! ``This won't make any sense if you haven't read "Happiness Is Just a Daddy Away!" Then again, it won't make much sense, anyway....

A very funny and senseless fic with two original characters. Very cliched. Rated PG-13 for a few swear words.

Really, this actually happens at Hogwarts! Okay, not really. A completely random day at Hogwarts. It definitely lacks plot.

Harry defeated Voldemort at the age of nineteen. Wanting a normal life he then left England, and moved to America, where he married a Muggle woman, and had their daughter, Eliza. When Eli was ten, he died as a result of what happened all those years ago. The killing curse had not killed him immediately. Instead, it shortened his life span significantly. At sixteen,, Eli decides to finish school at Hogwarts, and hopefully do what her father could not: make amends with those he left behind long before he died. Simple enough, except Eli inherited her father's knack for getting in trouble.

Fred and George go a bit overboard in their pranks, and seem to have angered EVERYBODY, including the ghosts! How will they get paid back for their over-the-top pranks? Tune in to find out!

Harry has been a hiding a dream of his for several years now... Hermione and Ron finally find out what it is. Do they decide to help Harry? Or do they just laugh at him?

A loose sequel to Girls Just Want To Have Fun, this little Seinfeldesque episode finds the girls trying to blend in during their vacation in the Big Apple...

Needless to say, Christmas never put Santa in a very good mood, but this particular Christmas was the last straw. As a very hung over Santa woke up the next morning in his sleigh somewhere in the Bahamas, he knew he’d hit rock bottom. There was only one man who could help him now… (Dumbledore/SANTA??)

It's not easy being easy being a Horcrux, you know. A glimpse into the life of a Horcrux! Oneshot.

You know those little people who pop up on your shoulder right before you're about to do something really fun and cool? Well, they're real. Yes, they are. Yes, they ARE!

Draco and Pansy are given an assignment forcing them to watch a muggle movie in a muggle theatre. After the movie, a conversation is made between the two Slytherin friends.

Take one Sirius and add in one James. Mix in liberal amounts of Remus and a dash of Peter. Top with hunks of fathers called Thomas and Daniel. What do you get? A night Out With the Boys.

Got sick of the same old fics about the heirs to the Founders of Hogwarts? Try a new persepctive here!

The zoo accident from Dudley's POV.

What happens when Harry and the gang find out about the book 'Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone'? Utter Chaos, that's what.

Idonea Snape was like many mothers - she wanted to keep a record of her son's childhood. Severus, on the other hand, never had the desire to even remember his past. Her diary couldn't be all that bad... could it?

When Mary Sue Parody's aunt and uncle are killed in a freak rollercoaster accident, she comes to live in the UK with her mad, long-lost aunt. Strange adventures await her at Hogwarts.

It's just a day in Weasley's Wizard Wheezes...

After Colin's adventures in the common room with his newly found treasure, the fuzzy pink socks, he makes his way to brother Dennis' room for a little "show and tell."

Post-Hogwarts. Voldemort is a mockery of the wizarding world. He's forced to work at a grocery store. Lots of bread and food items and a very insane Bob/Voldemort. Story one of a series. With your host, Jennifer Stick-it.

Lupin works the night shift on a golden oldies radio show, learns how to do his laundry, and eats his own sofa. Takes place just prior to PoA. Parody of angst fic.

Hogwarts' weekly entertainment! Dumbledore's decided to have a talk/game/reality show! Challenges, humor, and plain stupidity follow!

Harry and Draco celebrate their first Christmas out of Hogwarts. Featuring Santa, ice, a scourgified turkey, lots of fluff and little plot.

A few years after finishing at Hogwarts, Hermione runs into her old DADA teacher Gilderoy Lockhart. One thing leads to another, and....

An incredibly insane, pointless, and AU story that I wrote for Language Arts. Includes a pessimist, an obsessed with bunnies person, Draco, Jessica Lee, Jennifer Patch, evil purple stuffed bunnies (of course) and myself.

"What you need is a love spell." Dudley's got a secret.

What happens when Lockhart gets free reign over a class in the dungeons... and full access to potentially lethal potion ingredients!

Sirius Black and James Potter are sworn enemies. Their parents have put that idea in their heads for years now. But both have magic power, and both are sorted into the same house. Can they stay enemies forever? A story of friendship, courage, and learning our parents aren't always right.

Harry and Co. get a full introduction to the modern British Rail system in all its glory. Just a bit of satire to cheer you up next time there's 'the wrong sort of snow'.

It's a few years after graduation, and life has gone on. Draco, however, has got an unwelcome house guest -- his father.

"A Peck of Owls," the chapter was called, the second chapter of the long-awaited fifth book.... so what about those owls? Was Hedwig really out hunting all evening? Or was she closer to home than Harry realized?

Daniel's birthday causes a Muggle invasion on Hogwarts that rearranges a few still standing prejudices.

Firestar038’s April Fool’s Day Challenge Entry. What is in store for Severus on April Fool's Day?

Night Before Christmas parody, told by sixth-year Lily Evans. Slightly sick, yet touching.

Harry always helps a friend in need, no matter the deed. Hermione needs an undercover to help her work her object of affections. Harry marches valiantly in, wearing no less than a pleated skirt and knee-high socks. Eyeshadow, rusty sporks and Bloodthirsty!Hermione come together in a wacky, very random piece.

Four young wizards receive invitations to a school that is located under Lake Superior! What? Don't LOOK at me like that, it's anti-Muggle security. Ahem, anyways, follow their adventures!

Harry wants to be normal. He doesn't want eyes staring or people talking about him. And it is all because he is...

When a baby and a dog are forced to live together, the dog is always the afflicted one. Padfoot has to learn that by his own bitter experience: Caine has just been born. A sequel to Baby on Board.

[Slash] In which the author parodies herself in a self-insertion Mary Sue-ish masterpiece after spending a little too much time reading certain journals and communities at LiveJournal.

Harry goes to the barren land of... Canada! Along the way he meets Doris-erm, Stockwell Day, Avril Lavigne and... Mike from Canmore! But why is everyone so mad at him?

A short description of what Gilderoy sees after the "mishap" with Ron's wand in the Chamber of Secrets...

While still alive they did divide / Their favorites from the throng / Yet how to pick the worthy ones / When they were dead and gone? / 'Twas Gryffindor who found the way, / He whipped me off his head / The founders put some brains in me / So I could choose instead!

A pregnant Luna requires a particular type of chocolate.