Severus Snape and the Weasley Prank

Fred and George Weasley, twins and resident pranksters of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, avidly watched the clock above the Gryffindor common room's fireplace. The second hand ticked past merrily. The Grandfather clock outside the common room softly chimed twelve times. The twins grinned at each other, much like the Cheshire cat. April Fool's Day had finally come.

They grabbed a large water goblet and snuck out of the common room. They tiptoed down the stairs, past the trophy room (narrowly missing being spotted by Peeves), past the doors to the Great Hall, and down to the dungeons.

Fred held the goblet as George manually picked the lock on door to the Potions classroom. Once inside, Fred placed the goblet on the floor and took out his wand. "Finite Incantatum," he whispered as he jabbed his wand in the goblet's direction.

The goblet turned into liquid for a moment, before rematerializing into a puppy. The puppy was lean with black and tan like a typical Doberman Pincher, except it's ears and tail were not cropped. There was a small vertical patch of white fur in between the tan on its chest. The puppy's eyes were brown and sparkling with canine intelligence. Upon seeing the potential playmates, the puppy opened it's mouth to yip in greeting, but George stopped it mid yip with a whispered 'Silencio.'

Fred turned to George and whispering, "Let's get out of here!" Relocking the door on their way out, the twins did just that.

Later that morning, Severus Snape unlocked the door to the Potions classroom. The door swung open and Severus stared at his classroom in a mixture of horror and disbelief.

The Potions room was in shambles. Broken vials lay scattered over the cobblestones, with the contents oozing around the shards. Several of the table's legs had been gnawed on. Severus looked to his desk, where the puppy was laying down, chewing one of the table legs.

"NO!!" he shouted. The puppy stopped and looked up, tail thumping against the stone floor. It sat up and yipped. Severus stalked over to the desk. Halfway there, a strong putrid smell hit his nostrils. The smell intensified with each stride towards the desk.

"WHAT DID YOU DO???!!" Severus had reached his desk. Occupying the space where his feet would normally go, was a huge pile of puppy poop. The puppy whined, as if to say, 'I had to go. I'm sorry.' "Lovely," Severus sighed.

He took out his wand and, while pointing it at the poop, muttered, "Evanesco." The poop vanished, but the smell lingered.

*Somewhere in London, a Muggle took a step forward, but instead of the hard cobblestone, their foot landed in squishy puppy poop. "Gross! This wasn't here earlier," they thought.*

Severus tried an air freshening spell, but the smell remained. He groaned and sat his wand on his desk, before leaving the room in search of Fabreeze.

The puppy jumped onto Severus's chair, then placed it's front paws on the desk. It reached out and snatched the wand in its teeth. It hopped off the chair and scampered away.

Severus came back clutching a bottle of Febreze. He sprayed it around the room and the offending odor dissipated. He put down the bottle and reached for his wand. Instead, his fingers met the hard surface of the desktop. Severus looked around the room. He spotted his wand under a table, in the puppy's mouth.

"HOW DARE YOU!!!" Severus spat as he stalked towards the puppy. The pup, not knowing any better and wanting to play, darted in the other direction. Around the room they went, with Severus screaming. "Give me my wand, so I can..." he stopped, panting.

'To Hufflepuff with it,' he thought, giving up. He sat down in his chair, with one hand on his knee and the other elbow on his desk, with his face resting on his hand. He stared at the puppy as he caught his breath.

The puppy stopped running to look at Severus. It calmly walked over and dropped the wand at Severus's feet, looking up with an expectant expression. Severus reached down, picked up his wand, and placed it back on the table after wiping it on a stained towel.

The pup stood on its hind legs, placing its front paws on Severus's knee. It then nudged Severus's hand with its cold, wet nose. Severus stared at the puppy and asked, "What?" The puppy yipped and wagged its tail. "What? You want to sit on my lap?" The puppy yipped again and nodded. "Fine, have it your way."

Severus picked up the puppy and held it close to his face. "I hate your stinking guts!" he said to it. The pup just whined and licked Severus on the nose. "But," he continued, "I guess you aren't that bad." He sat the puppy on his lap.

"Now, where did you come from? More importantly, what imbecile locked you in a Potions classroom overnight?" The puppy tumbled off his lap and scuttled to the spot where Fred and George Weasley sat. "What do you think you're doing!?" The puppy barked then looked back and forth between Severus and the chairs, yipping as he turned his head. "Oh," he said as it clicked. Using the Sonorus charm, he yelled, "FRED AND GEORGE WEASLEY! GET HERE THIS MINUTE---"

Fred looked at George. "Oh, dear..." was all they said before fleeing the Great Hall, heading to the dungeon.

George came into the potions classroom first, saying, "Er...hello? Can anyone tell me what's going on here?"

"You tell me, Mister Weasley." Severus said. The puppy was laying in Severus's arms. "Tell me, Misters Weasley, what possessed you to leave this... dog, in my classroom overnight?"

"We didn't do it, Professor Snape. Honestly!" The twins said.

"Oh, really? I have proof you two did it, so don't even try to deny it," Severus hissed.

Fred stepped forward. "It was my idea, Professor Snape."

"YOU ABSOLUTE IDIOT! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!!??" Fred and George winced.

"We thought it would be funny," Fred started.

"-to pull a prank on you," George finished.

"Yes-" Severus began, but was interrupted by voices outside in the corridor. The voices became louder as the speakers came closer to the classroom. The voices stopped as Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, and Draco Malfoy poked their heads inside the room. Harry was sporting spiked, silver hair, Ron's vibrant red hair was forest green, Hermione was wearing green and silver makeup, and Draco's platinum blonde hair had red and gold streaks, he also had a flowing red and gold beard. The four stared in shock at the sight of the mean Potions Professor holding a puppy and actually seeming to care about it. The four spoke at once.

"Bloody Hell!" Ron shouted.

"I say, is that what I think it is?" Harry asked.

"By Merlin's beard, that's--" Draco stuttered.

"Awww, what a cute puppy," Hermione said.

The three boys stared at Hermione. "What?" she asked, "It is cute." The puppy yipped and thumped its tail against Severus's side. Severus noticed the Trio and Draco. He walked over, the puppy still in his arms. Hermione reached out and scratched the puppy behind the ears. The puppy licked her hand, and leaned into the petting.

"Potions class is cancelled for today," he said, spelling a sign on the door that read what he said. Hermione stopped scratching the puppy. When they didn't move, he barked, "GET THE HELL OUT OF MY SIGHT!!" The group turned and fled.

Once out of the Potion Master's earshot, Ron spoke, "Blimey, was that--"

"Yes!" Hermione answered before he could finish.

Severus returned his attention to the Weasley twins. "Now as for you two. Did you not think about the dog? You locked it in a room filled with glass jars and all sorts of potentially poisonous substances. Look what it did," he shifted the puppy and pointed to the broken vials on the floor.

The twins looked and grimaced. George said, "We're sorry, Professor. It won't happen again."

"Since I don't feel you are responsible enough to take care of the puppy, I will be taking care of it. You will also serve detention with Mr. Filch every Friday night for a month. Now, go to your next class."

"Yes, Sir," the twins said as they left the room. Severus placed the puppy on the floor, took out his wand. He vanished the broken vials, the spilt potion ingredients, and repaired the table legs. He picked up the puppy and went to his chambers, locking the door as he left.

Once in his room, he sat down with the puppy on his lap. "Now what to name you, but first I have to see what you are." He lifted the puppy up and looked. "Now that I know you are a girl, it will make naming you a lot easier." He thought for a moment. "How about Nana?" She growled. Cindy, Sally, Leia, Mary, and Fiona got the same reaction.

Absentmindedly, Severus started to hum the Habañera from the opera, Carmen. The puppy yipped. "You want to be called Carmen?" Severus asked the puppy. She wagged her tail and barked. "Carmen it is then." He petted Carmen and scratched behind her ears. "As soon as I tell Albus, we'll go to Diagon Alley for some supplies."