Shoulder Argumentations

You know those little people on muggle cartoons that pop up on your shoulders just before your about to do something really fun and cool? Yeah, well, they're real. I know because I've had a recent encounter with my shoulder "people".

Yes, they are. They ARE real. I'm not going to argue with you; I'm not going to argue with you. Well, anyway, if you will please ignore that idiot in the back I'll continue my story.

I was standing outside the greenhouses wearing my favorite set of vegetable earrings (you mean you don't have more than one pair?), when Lavender and Parvati started making fun of me. I was about to remind Lavender of the time she had a little problem with the home hair-lighting kit, when my shoulder angel made it's appearance (Isn't it funny how they look just like you but have different names?)

She popped up on my left shoulder, she or rather I, was wearing a long white robe with a golden halo above my head; a book in my arms. You know, I always wondered what book that was, was it the Bible? The Koran? The Torah? Or was is something fun like '100 ways to hex your ex' seeing as she (or I) was an angel I'm crossing out the latter.

"Now, now, you wouldn't want to embarass Lavender infront of all her friends would you?" she asked me, taking a glance over to where Lavender and her "friends" were laughing at my beautifully crafted earpieces. I was about to answer when my shoulder devil made herself known.

She was wearing a short, low-cut, red dress and stilletto heels; holding a pointed staff. She looked more like a hooker than a devil, "Oh, come on, the bitch making fun of her!" the devil Me yelled, "A quick curse won't hurt anyone!" she turned her gaze towards me, "I'm Elvira, by the way."

I was about to try and speak again but I was cut off, "You should be ashamed cursing like that!" the angelic Me retorted. "Now, just hurry along to your next class and leave the nice girl alone." she advised. "I'm Angelica."

"Ironic, isn't it?" I said to the little angel Me. I was ignored.

"This coming from a chick wearing white after labor day," said Elvira carelessly, observing her long crimson red nails

"White is the purest color there is!" said the white-robe clad Me

"Yeah, but it looks real stupid if you have a leak," my demon spat, turning around so we got a three hundered sisty degree view of her. "That's what I love about red."

"Red is the color of Satan!" said my angelic guradian, placing a hand on her heart.

"Memo to you," said my personal wrong-bringer, gesturing towards her flawless figure (I love to flatter myself). "I am Satan."

"PEOPLE!" yelled Angelica, as Ginny bound towards me. And as quickly as they had appeared they were gone.

Needless to say, I never said anything to Lavender; mainly because the stupid shoulder people wasted my time and I had to rush off to class. I told Ginny about my little friends and looked at me like I was crazy. Which, I remind my myself, I probably am. But I know two things: one, my devil guardian was way cooler, And two, shoulder guardians ARE real, just ask Jerry from 'Tom and Jerry' (Muggle cousins, don't ask).

Anyway, I'm looking forward to seeing them again. They weren't very helpful, or as cool as Wing-backed-flapclappers, but it was fun watching them fight; I know this sounds a bit odd, and I know it breaks all moral rules but I think I liked Elvira more . . .and if I see them again, I'm listening to her.