461 - 480 of 670 Stories

Lord Voldemort has reluctantly agreed to write his confession on a roll of parchment. Here is what he has to say to the world...

No one knew why the Snape hated Christmas so much,``Some said facing a werewolf had scarred him a touch,``Some said serving Lord Thingy had made him a prat,``But most said it was due to a vulture-topped hat.

Life is beautiful in the Malfoy Mansion... According to Draco, ``that is. But a new evil force may change that forever! Now Draco is faced with ``a challenge: Defeat the evil Lord Lispbeger, or talk to cute fluffy bunny rabbits.

After Draco Malfoy joins the Death Eaters, Hermione Granger is sent to ensure the induction does not go smoothly. With ingenuity and some muggle humour, Draco's chances for life among the Death Eaters seem as likely as a dead (Norwegian Blue, lovely plumage) parrot, only being "tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk."

Welcome to the OoP filk musical, “At 12 Grimmauld Place," which tells the story of OoP in songs from the classic movie, then musical, “Forty-Second Street.”

Poor Mary Sue! She came to Hogwarts looking for a bit of fun with a mysterious, brooding hero-type...but it looks like her hero's already in love!

Feeling a little confused about the identity of the Half-Blood Prince? Fear not, you aren't alone. Harry discovers that he, Voldemort, Ron, Hermione, and a few surprising guest others are confused about it as well.

“You can’t, can you? And you’re more articulate than I am. It’s just a feeling, Moony. One of those feelings that you can’t explain, but it’s there. Like love, Moony, like love. You can’t describe that either. That’s what the tapestry feels like. But I also got this gnawing feeling from it…like anguish or something.”

Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy as superheroes! Join in the guttery fun as they save the world from Lord MoldyShorts. An appearance from Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy! (Harry/Draco slash, AU, Parody)

When the Dark Lord has trouble recovering from his Obliviator Charms, Draco, Ginny, and their pink-haired offspring are asked to help him relocate to Japan. A squirrel wreaks havoc, a toaster complains loudly, and general madness ensues. Utterly silly D/G.

Sirius Black tries to investigate in some matters. Sequel to "Take Two."

It's what you've all been waiting for: the Harry Potter musical! Here's the script for "Yo Yo Yo, It's the Sorcerer's Stone," in which Hagrid has to pee, Dumby gets naked, and stupidity is just around the corner!

This wacky, rather odd story tells the tale of what might happen if Hogwarts was ever visited by a Wizard of Oz-type tornado. Starring Neville and Luna, this fic features a flying Greenhouse, Boating!CrossDressing!Snape and singing, dancing, candy-waving House Elves. What's not to love?

Reality is suspended.... Harry and Draco are both gay, and they both want each other... can we see where this is going? Slash.

A Blind Round Robin written by Stufler, Larinzia Hope, Ginnysdarkside, AmanitaMuscaria1, Shahrazad, and others. Harry's day starts out bad, and goes out on a random tangent from there...

Take a delightful peak into a peculiar alternate universe where "magic" is synonomous with "occult"! WARNING: The following fic contains irony, Monty Python humor, camp, and maybe a spot of liquified brain matter. Don't worry about that. ^_^ (Satan and the Occult claim no ownership to Harry Potter.)

A heroic saga of forbidden love. The Romeo and Juliet of the modern age. It's Harry/Draco... in verse!

Whatever terrible fears Harry had about parallel universes paled in comparison to what he was about to fall into now!

Finally, there is a solution to all of Hogwarts' relationship problems! That's right, a world-renowned speaker is coming to talk at the school! Now, if only Ron wasn't in love with Hermione who's in love with Harry who's in love with... are they any love lines that *aren't* crossed in this school?

Five years after defeating You-Know-Who in his final year at Hogwarts, Harry suddenly emerges from a long disappearance to meet up with Hermione and Ron in a Muggle bar for the first time since graduation. Their conversation reveals the shocking truth about where Harry has been hiding out, why Dumbledore was really kicked out of Hogwarts, and what, exactly, is a Magic Milkworm. WARNING: May spoil the Harry Potter books for you forever.

What happened to a certain character's property after he died? The Wisconsin Court of Appeals had a real headache to deal with... Inspired by a discussion on A.J. Hall's LiveJournal after OotP's release. Refers to characters from Lust Over Pendle.

A songfic to Rodger's And Hammerstein's Cinderella, "Stepsister's Lament." An otherwise more or less normal day for Hermione until she walks into the Great Hall to find Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley enjoying the company of each other just a little too much for Hermione. Appearing as both Stepsisters, Hermione is the star of this story. Ah, curse them teenage hormones.

In appreciation of the author's inclusion of more humorous stories, the Hogwarts students invite me to spend sometime with them in their world. A continuation of sorts from "I Panicked."

Long before Hermione wore buns, a little boy named Tommy Riddle lived in a rundown old orphanage. When Orion Jensen and his young apprentice Albus Dumbledore discover the boy's magical powers, complications lead to anger, and anger leads to another segment in the saga. The Phantom Vampire attacks!!

Holidays at Happy Wizards Retirement Home are always exciting! Pancake breakfasts with Bingo make them even MORE exciting, though Hermione apparently hates both pancakes and bingo. Will Harry stay awake long enough for the festivities? Will Ginny remember what she was doing five minutes ago? Find out here in the third HAPPY WIZARDS RETIREMENT HOME!

The Sorcerer's Stone movie gets a makeover- along with some help from a really pervy Snape, Gryffindor bashing, and more references to obscure 80's cult movies than you can shake a bowtruckle at!

Harry's feet continued to carry him towards Snape's office, while his mind was battered relentlessly by comments such as, "I'm sure kissing Snape would be wonderful, even if he doesn't brush his teeth," and "You know what they say about men with big noses."

Draco gets a traumatizing flashback and sees someone he had hoped to forget.

Draco has a problem in the, uh, bathroom. How will he solve his predicament? And how does Hermione fit in the picture?

VOLDEMORT! The Musical: The breathtaking story of the young, sinister Tom Riddle and his ascent to power as You-Know-Who! ``Rita Skeeter's defamation of the show only covered one page! ``Ludo Bagman BETS it will run on Diagon Alley for years to come! ``Includes the hit songs "Defying Mortality," "Suddenly, Slughorn," and "Boy Who Lived"!

A mysterious pumpkin pie arrives for Harry at the Gryffindor table one morning. Everyone who takes a bite and washes it down with a nice glass of pumpkin juice starts acting a little out of character. Snape is nice, Harry has the hots for Hermione, and Ron is a Death Eater. Can Hermione figure out why everyone is acting so weird?!

Summer vacation takes an unexpected turn when Harry's fantasy comes to life. Includes Draco Malfoy in a pink tutu.

After the third task of the Triwizard Tournament, Sirius seeks solace in Remus' company. A slashy short.

Harry has at last defeated Voldemort, and the wizarding world rejoices – that is, almost all of them. Professor Flitwick finds love in an unusual place, and Fawkes the phoenix makes a new friend. Featuring an amazing bit of vocal work by Lucius Malfoy. A parody of the musical "Oklahoma!"

There's something strange about Lavender's pet rabbit Binky... (American version)

This is a blatant parody of Mary Sue fics. -- Mary Sue is headed to Hogwarts... but nothing goes the way she expects.

Harry attends the reading of his father's will and learns more about himself and his father than he ever could have imagined. For a Fandom Cliché Challenge.

Just a short parody about the night Lily and James died using the song "I Will Always Love You"... I've been told its a little sad...

A horrible rumour has been spreading through the Wizarding community that Draco Malfoy is predictable! In order to suppress this vicious lie, Draco devises a not so clever scheme to prove the world wrong. But to his chagrin everyone else is acting strangely out of character. Just what on earth is going on in Hogwarts?

Father—``All of Hogwarts has gone crazy, and you need to come here and put it all to rights. Please hurry.``Your son,``Draco``P.S. This is all Potter’s fault.

[ONE-SHOT] Confessions and revelations were made under the moonlight. [Harry/Draco]

Draco Malfoy is beset by the greatest question of all. To shag or not to shag Harry Potter? A play and parody based on quotes from Shakespeare's Hamlet.

What happens when a bunch of people are forced to participate in a dreidel dueling game?

The rare..The endangered...Peter Mary-Sue!! A parody of Mary-Sue.

His hands were larger than he remembered, and it sickened him in some distant chamber of his mind, made him feel clumsy, grotesque, dirty. The shape of his fingernails made him want to claw at the walls - they were bitten nearly to the quick; he couldn’t remember chewing them.``A single red drop rolled down his chin and fell into his shirt sleeve. His top teeth dug into his lower lip - deep, raw, chapped and gnawed.``So this was the result of fear?

It's Ginny Weasley's sixth year, and she's about had it with love. How can something that's supposed to be so wonderful make a person ache so much inside? Why does her heart seem to want what it can never have? Will Ginny be proven wrong by a fateful turn of events at the Yule Ball?

Ever wondered what it is like inside a wizarding STI clinic? Draco never cared, but then one day, he found himself thrown upon their goodwill. A place where surnames don't matter if you've got your sausage hanging out.

This is a parody of the song "Elephant Love Medley" from Moulin Rouge. This time it's Ron and Hermione doing the singing. What could be better?

Harry fell from his broom during a freak Quidditch accident, and now everyone is acting very strangely. Harry's in love with Oliver Wood, and everyone else is in love with. . . Buddy Holly? Be prepared to not take yourself seriously. A little HP/DM, HP/OW and various other pairings.

Harry Potter/Alice in Wonderland parody; fluff and silliness are rampant.

Blaise Zabini, in a quest to discover his true sex, goes on a journey that takes him to some very unusual places. Featuring a lovely song by Mrs Rowling herself! A parody of the musical "Man of La Mancha."

The sequel to "A Death Eater Meeting That Will Never Happen"! Isn't the title imaginatve? It is a continuation of that epic, poignant story. Plus, it's still a parody (still written before OotP), but includes bits about the second movie, and is even funnier than the first! Wow! I can't believe it's not butter!

"Oh squid, you're the only one who understands me!" cried Harry, after a particularly long angst fest.``"Blub," muttered the squid, rolling it eyes.``A parody of angst fics, and of Harry/Squid parings. Harry is extremely angsty. The squid is annoyed with Harry's angst. Much mayhem ensures.

Ginny is surrounded by (in her opinion) morons, pillocks and generally nutty people. And as if that weren’t bad enough, Draco Malfoy keeps asking her out: again… and again… and again....

What happens when Harry tries to impress a girl, (Cho); Two Rabbit relations try to take over the world; and the Monty Python Gang search for the Holy Grail? MASS CHAOS! (Plus the startling revelation: Crabbe and Goyle ACTUALLY know a word over FOUR LETTERS LONG!!! (Excluding Grunting))

Throw in a prankster first year Gryffindor, Voldemort, and the usual suspects. Stir. Fall of your chair laughing.

With Dumbledore dead and two new teachers at school, it seems that students can't trust anyone their own problems. But, behold! A new advice column has opened, to give advice and support for...Oh, nevermind, it's Smith from Hufflepuff who's writing it.

Some pretty strange things are happening. Harry's fmaily is being nice to him, Hermione's changed a lot, and the teachers are all...well, you'll see. A humorous look at Harry's sixth year.

Join the students of Hogwarts as some embark on a journey to be the ultimate winner of the Muggle reality show "The Challenge." Who will stand alone in the end and win the million Galleons?

Well, what do YOU think would happen if Hermione fell out of a window?

How many of you realise that Monty Python and the Holy Grail has its equivalent story in the Hogwarts universe? I stumbled across an ancient tome, and when I transcibed and translated I found the true story of the French Castle.

Karaoke night in Hogsmeade.

The uniquely American sport of bronco busting takes on a new flair when a Hippogriff is substituted for the usual bull or horse. Watch various Harry Potter characters take on the griff and see who can stay the distance!``Giddyup, ya'll!

It's the Trio's last year at Hogwarts, and something quite unexpected has happened to Ron. All Harry wants is the truth.

This is my take on how the FINAL showdown between our hero Harry and that evil serpent Voldemort will happen! I've been told it's funny... but then again, I'm justifiably insane, so don't hold anything you read against me!

The songs parodied in the work are the property of Tom Lehrer, a writer of humorous songs that have entertained for over a half-century.

If you're looking for a Harry Potter centered fan fic this is not it! This is centered around 7th year Gryffindor, Divination witch, Lavender Brown. See...er...all the sneaking around and stuff that goes on...er yeah.

Sirius has the inside track to the Hogwarts grapevine thanks to Harry.

Your typical stupid, plotless, fluffy, sappy fanfic complete with your American-exchange student, the OC that seduces Harry Potter, and a blissfully happy ending. Harry/OC.

After a nasty fall, Harry is stricken with amnesia. Now it's a race against the clock as Harry struggles to regain his memories before Lord Voldemort can take advantage of his vulnerability. (Response to the Multifandom Soap Opera Cliche Challenge.)

What do Harry and his friends actually DO while they're waiting for us to put them into our stories? And how do they feel about US? A behind-the-scenes glimpse of our favorite characters. **** Pairings: nearly everyone, at one point or another.

Welcome to the World of Courtney Carson, a pessimistic fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. After following the terrible trio as an extracurricular activity for four years, Courtney admits she's taking a liking for the famous Harry Potter. Things can't get any worse when she faces one embarassing situation after another, Harry is in steady relationship with her worst enemy, she gets into a row with her best friend, and someone unexpected asks her out.

HP/Celtic fairy tale crossover. Did you ever wonder how such a bad wizard came to be? Or why Tom Riddle grew up in an orphanage?

Got sick of the same old fics about the heirs to the Founders of Hogwarts? Try a new persepctive here!

When Mary Sue Parody's aunt and uncle are killed in a freak rollercoaster accident, she comes to live in the UK with her mad, long-lost aunt. Strange adventures await her at Hogwarts.

Da da da da daaaaaaaaaa! It's Quidditch Night in Canada! Witness an exciting match from the Stonewall Stormers and Moose Jaw Meteorites, Cedric in a plaid robes, and Avril Lavigne! Because it just isn't a Canadian fic without Avril...

The zoo accident from Dudley's POV.

Night Before Christmas parody, told by sixth-year Lily Evans. Slightly sick, yet touching.

[Slash] In which the author parodies herself in a self-insertion Mary Sue-ish masterpiece after spending a little too much time reading certain journals and communities at LiveJournal.

Molly Price has made a fic good enough to be accepted to Fiction Alley School of Writing about Witchcraft and Wizardry! With her friends Marylin Susan (unfortunately named by her parents) and Uncle Voldie (Formerly Voldemort, the most evil villian this side of the Mississippi, whose former life Molly has a crush on) will she find her way in Fiction Alley?

A strange virus attacks Hogwarts and causes a peculiar epidemic. Severe oddness warning. Also, not nice to Harry!

Top notch Daily Prophet Susan Bones is Kate Kinsel and the Fellytones' biggest fan. Follow her as she attempts to figure out the secret behind the most popular wizarding band ever! Read news articles, song lyrics, quotes and appearances from all your favorite characters. Why is there a shortage of Ice Mice in the United Kingdom? Why have the Chudley Cannons started selling out all of their games? Who are Charlie and Tonks dating? Will Stubby Boardman ever settle down? Will the Weasley Twins ever give a legitimate answer? Keep reading for the answers to these questions and more!

From Chicago, it's 'I Can't Do it Alone' starring Lord Voldemort and Wormtail! Sequins, shouting and stomping!

Eudice Eusyram, everyone’s (least) favorite Mary Sue, returns to fight Dolores Umbridge in the worst sequel ever!

Songs fics based off the great Beatles hits, "Birthday", "Blackbird", "Drive My Car", and "Help From My Friends".

What is Harry's seventh year going to be like? Some of my (satirical) speculations.

Incredibly stupid, confectionary sacrilege, and an Evil Auction. Draco wears pink and prances. Lucius is in denial. Uncle Voldie needs money. What more can you ask for in a badfic?

Gromit reveals to Wallace he's an Animagus and flies him to Hogwarts.

The students were desperate for relief. A professor was in need of mercy. One solution provided relief to them all. It came at a price.

What do Dementors do in their free time? This one-shot ponders the existence of tea rooms in Azkaban, and ponders that vital question: who finished the milk and didn't buy a new bottle?

To win a ticket on the grandest ship in the world, from a lucky hand of strip poker, is no doubt extremely excitining. But also to find the love of your life in just a few short hours is just amazing. This happens to a young man by the name of Draco Malfoy, who finds his love in another young man named Harry Potter. Together they withstand the wonderful/horrid journey on the R. M. S. Titanic

Two fans of The Boy Who Lived set out on a pilgrimage to get a glimpse of their idol.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione move to darkest Oregon in the Heart Of The Country to get away from city life.

What happens when the author gets involved? Anything! Contains a suitable Mary-Sue, dancing monkeys, EvilManiac!Dumbledore, and much more funnyness! It is very much funny!

It’s Lord Voldemort, the Dark Lord of the Death Eaters, versus Professor Eudice Eusyram, the sultana of Suedom! Take a wild guess who will win.

Poor little Harry. Always having the bad hair, the big ugly clothes, those horrible glasses. But it doesn't have to be that way, you know.

A parody. Harry finds a very peculiar and perilous handbook, and travels through an unbelievable alternate universe where everything is upside-down.

Once upon a time…is such a cliché. Ginny, Parvati, Lavender…all of my girlfriends have started their autobiographies with those four little words. I hate cliches; they’re just overused, too cheap for my taste. Every fair maiden from here to THE END can use that line.

Welcome aboard Hogwarts Airlines! Please keep all magic out of the aisle and make sure that there are no loose bolts in your brain. Thank you for flying with us, we hope you live to make the return trip!