1,061 - 1,080 of 3,602 Stories

Hermione is kidnapped... Again! This time by the cousin of Draco Malfoy! It is now that Hermione wakes to find herself in a dark room. It is cold and the ropes on her wrists and ankles hurt. She sighs. Not again, she thinks. ``She begins to look around for the one guilty of kidnapping her. He isn’t around. Odd. No matter, Hermione thinks. He’ll be back soon. He’s probably out getting a cappuccino or something.

Hermione just wants to be left alone. Not going to happen.

Harry is shopping for Christmas. Again. (H/D)

Twelve people get a rather threatening letter to be in the Room of Requirement--or else. So when they do go in, they read a book. A 'Sue story that will most likely scar them for life.

This is the true story of seven, not-so-much strangers, chosen to live together in a house, and not kill each other. This is the Real Wizarding World--London.

A third part to my Caught In The Act series. Snape hears the Gryffindors doing... things, and can't help but take action.

Two students visit Madam Pomfrey with an embarrassing problem. The cure may possibly be worse than the disease.

Sometimes, a married man just has to admit to himself how much he longs for little boys.

As soon as Draco woke up, he knew it was going to be one of those days where the whole world is out to get you. But can a bad day lead to an extraordinary turn of events? Wondefully OOC. Not as cliche as is sounds; features Showtune!Blaise and Leatherpants!Draco.

Draco Malfoy, the ever cunning Slytherin, is living up to his name. The annoying Golden Trio (Potty, Weasel and Mudblood) are going down!

James is barely making it through work one day when a pregnant Lily decides to pick up an extra ingredient for their dinner that evening.

Draco Malfoy chose to raise his son differently.

Maths like it's taught in Muggle schools is useless, isn't it? In this matter, both Ron and his son Nick think alike. Unfortunately, they have to complete Nick's maths homework together - but luckily there's always some help around.

Books, Potions, house-elves, intrigue, romance novels, Hermione, Draco, and not a love story...

While packing for another long year at Hogwarts, Fredrick J. Weasley reminiscences about his family and all of their little quirks. Interested in seeing what Fred really thinks about his siblings? Oh, be afraid . . . be very afraid . . .

Back by popular demand! Those fangirls, never giving Hermione peace about their captured hotties. She has (reluctantly) written another book on how to care for a Hogwarts hottie, this one on the ever popular Draco Malfoy.

When Lily spends her afternoon studying in the library for the upcoming O.W.L.s, she never expects to overhear the Marauders put the finishing touches on their greatest achievement…The Marauder’s Map.

The Hogwarts staff has, once again, gathered to eat lunch. Once again, they are tormented by a horror-inspiring DADA teacher. This man makes the Basilisk look like a giant, murderous snake. Well, anyway, it's the sicho-romantic of Hogwarts, the incompetent, over-confident GILDROY LOCKHART! (Featuring a cameo by Dumbledore.)

What's the best thing to do after a year of nonstop studying? Going on vacation, of course!

A comedy about Harry and his broomstick. This experience is not necessarily any 'normal' ride around the pitch.

The story of Sirius Black, a vampire allergic to blood, a cannibal, a man who runs around naked, and a man named Bruce. Oh yeah, and an attempt to be the first man ever to escape from Azkaban.

Thirteen-year-old Draco Malfoy has recently become a junior Death Eater, but certain events that befall him after a Floo accident and involve a certain person with messy dark hair and spectacles make him regret it. An AU story.

Just as Voldemort finds a way to attack Hogwarts and overcome Dumbledore, Harry finds that he has even bigger problems. Snarry humour.

You know all those fanfics about a certain greasy-haired so-and-so growing a soul when he meets his long-lost-child? MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

Remus Lupin has problems. He's a wizard. He's a werewolf. He's somehow got himself very, very lost. And he's just been arrested by the Ankh-Morpork City Watch. Things can only get worse...

The (of course) humourous tale of four friends in their fifth year at Hogwarts and how they live at school with the invention of the all new Marauder's Map. Just what will they do first?

Finally, It Has Arrived! The sequel to Do It With A Mystery.``Set before Do It With A Mystery, how did the relationship begin? Includes five strange people and some crazed dreams.``WARNING: Crabbe and Goyle Cherubs found within.

Like nearly everything in Harry Potter's life, even taking a shower is a doom-laden, disturbing experience, accompanied by dark thoughts and scenes which nightmares are made of. Cold water in the magical world seems to have unexpected side effects...

There’s one thing little Harry wants from Santa Claus more than anything else: a little sister or brother. Remus and Severus tell the boy not to be disappointed, but in the end, they can hardly do anything but believe.

Draco goes in for a facial, looking for relaxation, and comes out with something more.

Harry is back for another year at Hogwarts and exciting events are about to happen! Did Sirius really die? Who is Ginny writing letters to? What's up with Luna and her makeover! And most importantly, crazy trashcans!? The Dark Lord is planning something dangerous...

A night of mischief for first-years Fred and George turns into one of discovery, and adventure ensues. What will they get up to as they begin to tap into the map's secrets? Loosely based on a certain scenario alluded to in PoA.

"Draco, impregnate me now!"

Remus has been sent to infiltrate Greyback's camp, and it isn't long before he realizes: Something's missing. Something important. What could it be? Who can help him in his hour of need...Or, rather, who WILL help him?

Hermione dictates a confession that tells all about Harry's secret kilt obsession. Warning, pants jokes ahead. (That's jokes about pants, not jokes that are pants.)

In Harry Potter's Seventh year there's a new DADA teacher. As usual, Severus Snape is angry, and the teacher is weird. And Dumbledore is an old yittish woman called the Matchmaker. (Figuratively speaking.) Appearances by Neville and Remus.

Peter has a girlfriend, and goodness only knows why, but she wants to go a bit further. But ickle Petie wasn't taught the Facts of Life yet, so it's up to the Marauders to explain some things to him. And they will. Oh, yes they will.

While Harry and Hermione are staying at the Burrow, Mr. Weasley comes home with two telephones. Harry and Hermione attempt to show him how to use them.

Will Harry and Severus put their difference aside long enough to grant Remus his Christmas wish? Yes and no.

In this wild world of fanfiction, Fred and George are up to their usual tricks, Ron and Hermione are FINALLY together, and Harry is, well...Harry! Warning: Extreme laughter. May cause seizures.

Two people meet in a cafe and find their way through a conversational minefield as a Deluxe Time-Turner interrupts their false starts, gaffes, faux pas and fandom clichés on the way to falling in love.

When Moreta, Goddess of Literature, looks at some of the Harry Potter fanfiction available online, she is far from happy. Slash? Crossovers? Mpreg? Just-developed-phenomenal-cosmic-powers-and-turned-into-an-absolute-hunk-overnight Harry? Oh, it's all just so wrong.

When Arthur and Molly leave for St. Mungo's to have their seventh child, Bill is left in charge of the Burrow. Surely, only so much can go wrong when the oldest Weasley is left in charge....

Draco's in denial. Ginny's in love. After a steamy``broom-cupboard romance, what will become of them both? Will Draco revert to his evil (and devilishly charming) self? What’ll Ginny do if she can't have that certain sex-god of a Slytherin?``Will Draco achieve his new and improved goals, including:``9. Win Witch Weekly’s Most Charming Smile Award, and knock that smarmy bastard Lockhart off his pedestal.``Can Ginny get Ron to admit that he has a major jones for Hermy? And if she can – what will Hermione do about it?``But most importantly, if Ginny and Draco DO get together… will Blaise Zabini cry?``Read their diaries (along with some very inappropriate poetry), side by side, day by day.

Crossover? Parody? Fanfic? All of the above? When Hogwarts meets The Colbert Report, anything goes!

As the Quidditch Championship game approaches, the teachers in the staff room sit around being competitive, tense, or -in the rare case of Remus Lupin- placidly amused and content. For once, the problem person at Hogwarts is not the DADA teacher, and everyone is very happy about it... except Snape. Of course, we can't count him because he's rarely ever happy about anything that everyone else in the staff is happy about. Rated R for horror and sexual content- no, I'm kidding. This is a child safe story, ladies and gentlemen.

An old woman tells her grandchildren about the adventures of her younger self... Starts between books four and five, telling of how Tonks``joined the Order of the Phoenix and her part in the war with Voldemort.

Draco's friends torment him using their own remixed version of The Little Mermaid's "Kiss the Girl." Chaos ensues.

Draco Malfoy wants to become the most perfect prefect in Hogwarts history. His only source for help? An annoying Gryffindor who's much more perfect than Malfoy thinks. How does the rigorous training work for Malfoy, though?

Harry was always going to be victorious. [Harry/Draco]

Draco and Hermione play a dangerous game of 'what if'. Winner at the Firewhiskey funny fic challenge for July!

A very long comedy. Will Harry ever get back his identity stolen by his evil twin? Will Voldemort ever get into the Lava Lamp club? Will the evil chipmunk stop Harry's quest?Why did Percy eat the Book of the Dead? Will Dudley ever find love?

Lavender and Parvati find a strange bunny on Hogwarts grounds that makes all kinds of mad-cap schemes come true. When they realize what is creating the chaos, they call in the one person they know they could count on... Professor Trelawney. Will the Divination Professor, Lavender and Parvati be able to save the school? Expect to see Mary Sue babysitting kid!Snape, Dumbledore, and McGonagall, Loving Harry and has no idea why!Draco, The Next Dark Lord! Hermione, and of course, Player!Neville.

Revenge is a dish best tasted cold. Sequel to Tiny Bubbles. Snape strikes back.

Once upon a time there was a group of individuals more powerful than the average person. They decided to form a band of which the likes had never been seen. Fabulous secret powers were revealed to them the day that held aloft their magic wands and said, "By the power of Cheese Monkeys, I am Mary Sue!" ``And then Albus Dumbledore and the rest of the canon characters chucked 'em out of the school.

Harry's been behaving very strangely. Hermione comes up with several theories, and a few interesting plans, but is she missing the point? And Ron's far too clueless to be any real use, isn't he?

This is the second in a series of stories attempting to explain some rather obvious names in the Harry Potter series. The first is Remus Lupin; this one is Sirius Black.

What happens when you mix Monty Python's The Search for the Holy Grail and Harry Potter? A lot of scary plotlines, and a lot of fun!

Ever wonder what went on in the Marauder's heads after they pranked, while they studied, at random parts of the day? Yes, you see what I'm getting at. All those crazy thoughts in drabble form. Short, sweet, and funny - just like them. Except for sweet.

(Formerly known as Baby? What Baby?) Hermione Granger gives birth to a boy (she thinks). Some people know, but her friends do not. See her try to survive the absolute insanity and danger of Hogwarts with a baby to "take care of." Definitely not canon-compliant. CAUTION: This story contains language, crude humor, sexual references, and a crazy old man.

Draco's been known to stretch the truth, but this time he goes too far: the whole school thinks he's dating Harry Potter. Harry tries to quash the rumors, Hermione counsels him on his sexuality, and Harry Potter might just have the teeniest crush on Draco Malfoy.

When James gets his hands on a rather colorful romance novel, owned by a certain Miss Lily Evans, can he survive the ensuing storm and get his Lily too?

Voldemort has been defeated for a second time. Draco Malfoy is miserable and on the run. Can Draco fix the problem by stopping the first fall? Or are there unintended consequences? And what does dancing have to do with any of this?

Ginny has accidentally turned in a diary entry of hers to… Professor Snape. Now how will she get out of this predicament? What grade is she going to get? But most of all what was going to happen when he calls her into his office? And what is going on in the Professor's mind?

What happens when the Marauders “take notes” during History of Magic class?

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Still, Harry might have more on his hands than he bargained for if it weren't for his Slytherin side...

Well this is a toughy. This is very hard to explain because, well it's Mokey. Lots of weirdness involved, you think it's normal? Well it's not! Next chapter will be better. Unless no one reviews and then no more chapters! Lots of Britney, Justin, and Joey goodness. ESPECIALLY MOKEY! (he's new!)

Snape finally gets the slappin he deserves.

It's the best feeling in the world, our palms sweaty, your breathing erratic, but then you pick up that black and white electric guitar and nothing else seems to matter.

Hermione and Draco are...drumroll, please!...Head Boy and Head Girl.

Tom Riddle's careers advice session.

Reg says diaries are for girls, but he doesn't know what he's talking about. First of all, girls can't write, everybody knows that (except Regulus, but what does he know?), and second, this isn't a diary. It's a journal. That's something totally different. A journal of my super-cool life--This is the very first sentence Sirius Black writes in his Diary/journal in his first year at Hogwarts. Other years will follow.

"Number 12 Grimmauld Place was silent. However, as the Fates saw, Christmas was not going to be a quiet affair." DHr, HG, Oneshot.

Ever wonder what would happen if you mixed the Andrew Llyod Webber musical 'Cats' with J.K. Rowling's 'Harry Potter' series? Well, here's the answer: Cats... Harry Potter Style. You'll see the characters as you've never seen them before... in full cat costume, including wig, makeup, and unitard while singing, dancing, jumping, twirling, spinning, and falling all over the stage. Set in the beautiful location of the Hogwarts School junkyard, this fic will truly be one you'll never forget.

A story about love and rum! Think your evening was bad? Have you ever seen one at Hogwarts after the drinks are passed around?

What happened to Percy after Minister Fudge sent him to owl the Daily Prophet about 'Dumbledore's Army'? And what happens when he bumps into a certain pair of brothers?

Let's face it: Snape is nasty to his students, especially if they are unlucky enough to be in Gryffindor. And what do the parents do? Meet Frances Spencer, Muggle mum of a Gryffindor first-year, facing the challenge of unfair teachers and the wizarding postal service...

"Saving the world before bedtime, it's...the Harrypuff Kids!" The dreaded Harry Potter/Powerpuff Girls crossover with Mayor!Dumbledore and MojoJojo!Voldemort.

Neville Longbottom has a secret love ... and it's Severus Snape! But does Snape feel the same about Neville? And exactly how do they convey their feelings through song anyway? A parody of Rodgers' & Hammerstein's musical "The Sound of Music"

Hermione anxiously awaits her O.W.L. results but gets an unexpected surprise instead.

Ron has played one too many practical jokes on his sister. Ginny's revenge is oh so sweet.

So, this is from the point of view of Lockhart's Mirror!! :) Poor thing, you know it gets used a lot!

Draco teaches Harry how to dance.

This is what happened when the characters of Harry potter met Caroline Skeeter Hogwarts new school shrink.

Voldemort pays a visit to Harry but ends up flirting shamelessly with Aunt Petunia! Honestly, carrying on like a couple of teenagers....

In which James and Lily get married, Sirius gets maudlin, Remus gets put-upon and everyone gets drunk.

A series of short stories written by different authors about, as the title says, Ron Weasley being humiliated in several unusual situations. :)

It started as a joke, then, six months later, turned into a full blown prank. With only Snape left in charge, how will Harry, Ron, and Hermione survive this one?

Viktor Krum never was one to revel in posing, primping, preening, being fawned or drooled over, or generally being manhandled and treated like a piece of meat by the so-called "fairer sex" that count themselves among his fandom. He's not much on being photographed or answering the same old questions or having his private life pried into, either, thanks very much. So when he gets *cough* volunteered by a certain bushy-haired fiancee to participate in a fundraiser for St. Mungo's that involves all of the above and then some... Let's just say Hermione will be needing to "express her gratitude" a great deal to make up for this.

Someone tries to fulfill their “Final Battle” story requirement with disastrous results.

Back by popular demand, the second installment of Siofra and Company includes just as much insanity as the original. Siofra and the girls are back, but this time the universal rift throws the ultimate switch: The Harry Potter characters are thrown into our universe. Will they blow the secret of the existence of the wizarding world? Will Siofra and Kiara ever be civil to one another? And where exactly is everyone going to sleep?

Hermione is not yet in Hogwarts, and doesn't even know about it. She's none too happy with her life, and wants some change!

Don't say I didn't warn you. Harry gets an invitation to a marvellous party; Malfoy resorts to double entendre.

Halo addicts, verbal romances, a considerably intelligent four year old and mistold adventures, this a fiction for anybody who's ever been on a long bus ride to enjoy! Just wait to say: "That's SO true" to nearly every line! This is a Crack!Fic of epic proportions for anybody who's ever been on a good, long bus ride!

James Potter is waiting for the Hogwarts Express to take him to Hogwarts for his first year of school. He's got no friends, a large trunk, and a kitten. And a little bit of advice from his mother.

Neville and Luna visit Ron and Hermione, and while Hermione is out shopping, Ron plays chess with Luna. Little does he know that Luna doesn't play chess quite like anyone Ron's ever played.

Dumbledore's mind is rotting. The time has come for bad stuff to happen! A stupid 5th year adventure with weird stuff, guest appearances, and an "incident".

Mary Sue has written a short memoir to give readers a chance to see into her amazing world. Learn about her entrance into the Hogwarts world and her lasting impact on those who are enthralled by her presence.

Sherlock!Sirius strikes again. Sequel to "The Case of the Misplaced Satisfaction."

'Have fun Harry, Ron!' Tonks waved enthusiastically, her eyes glittering merrily. 'Don’t mess your trousers!' Harry and Ron are sharing a surprise birthday gift... but in the company of Tonks and the Weasley twins?!