1,081 - 1,100 of 3,602 Stories

The story of Sirius Black, a vampire allergic to blood, a cannibal, a man who runs around naked, and a man named Bruce. Oh yeah, and an attempt to be the first man ever to escape from Azkaban.

Just as Voldemort finds a way to attack Hogwarts and overcome Dumbledore, Harry finds that he has even bigger problems. Snarry humour.

Thirteen-year-old Draco Malfoy has recently become a junior Death Eater, but certain events that befall him after a Floo accident and involve a certain person with messy dark hair and spectacles make him regret it. An AU story.

You know all those fanfics about a certain greasy-haired so-and-so growing a soul when he meets his long-lost-child? MWAHAHAHAHA!!!

Remus Lupin has problems. He's a wizard. He's a werewolf. He's somehow got himself very, very lost. And he's just been arrested by the Ankh-Morpork City Watch. Things can only get worse...

The (of course) humourous tale of four friends in their fifth year at Hogwarts and how they live at school with the invention of the all new Marauder's Map. Just what will they do first?

Finally, It Has Arrived! The sequel to Do It With A Mystery.``Set before Do It With A Mystery, how did the relationship begin? Includes five strange people and some crazed dreams.``WARNING: Crabbe and Goyle Cherubs found within.

Like nearly everything in Harry Potter's life, even taking a shower is a doom-laden, disturbing experience, accompanied by dark thoughts and scenes which nightmares are made of. Cold water in the magical world seems to have unexpected side effects...

There’s one thing little Harry wants from Santa Claus more than anything else: a little sister or brother. Remus and Severus tell the boy not to be disappointed, but in the end, they can hardly do anything but believe.

Draco goes in for a facial, looking for relaxation, and comes out with something more.

A night of mischief for first-years Fred and George turns into one of discovery, and adventure ensues. What will they get up to as they begin to tap into the map's secrets? Loosely based on a certain scenario alluded to in PoA.

Harry is back for another year at Hogwarts and exciting events are about to happen! Did Sirius really die? Who is Ginny writing letters to? What's up with Luna and her makeover! And most importantly, crazy trashcans!? The Dark Lord is planning something dangerous...

"Draco, impregnate me now!"

Remus has been sent to infiltrate Greyback's camp, and it isn't long before he realizes: Something's missing. Something important. What could it be? Who can help him in his hour of need...Or, rather, who WILL help him?

Hermione dictates a confession that tells all about Harry's secret kilt obsession. Warning, pants jokes ahead. (That's jokes about pants, not jokes that are pants.)

In Harry Potter's Seventh year there's a new DADA teacher. As usual, Severus Snape is angry, and the teacher is weird. And Dumbledore is an old yittish woman called the Matchmaker. (Figuratively speaking.) Appearances by Neville and Remus.

Peter has a girlfriend, and goodness only knows why, but she wants to go a bit further. But ickle Petie wasn't taught the Facts of Life yet, so it's up to the Marauders to explain some things to him. And they will. Oh, yes they will.

While Harry and Hermione are staying at the Burrow, Mr. Weasley comes home with two telephones. Harry and Hermione attempt to show him how to use them.

Will Harry and Severus put their difference aside long enough to grant Remus his Christmas wish? Yes and no.

In this wild world of fanfiction, Fred and George are up to their usual tricks, Ron and Hermione are FINALLY together, and Harry is, well...Harry! Warning: Extreme laughter. May cause seizures.

When Moreta, Goddess of Literature, looks at some of the Harry Potter fanfiction available online, she is far from happy. Slash? Crossovers? Mpreg? Just-developed-phenomenal-cosmic-powers-and-turned-into-an-absolute-hunk-overnight Harry? Oh, it's all just so wrong.

Two people meet in a cafe and find their way through a conversational minefield as a Deluxe Time-Turner interrupts their false starts, gaffes, faux pas and fandom clichés on the way to falling in love.

When Arthur and Molly leave for St. Mungo's to have their seventh child, Bill is left in charge of the Burrow. Surely, only so much can go wrong when the oldest Weasley is left in charge....

Draco's in denial. Ginny's in love. After a steamy``broom-cupboard romance, what will become of them both? Will Draco revert to his evil (and devilishly charming) self? What’ll Ginny do if she can't have that certain sex-god of a Slytherin?``Will Draco achieve his new and improved goals, including:``9. Win Witch Weekly’s Most Charming Smile Award, and knock that smarmy bastard Lockhart off his pedestal.``Can Ginny get Ron to admit that he has a major jones for Hermy? And if she can – what will Hermione do about it?``But most importantly, if Ginny and Draco DO get together… will Blaise Zabini cry?``Read their diaries (along with some very inappropriate poetry), side by side, day by day.

An old woman tells her grandchildren about the adventures of her younger self... Starts between books four and five, telling of how Tonks``joined the Order of the Phoenix and her part in the war with Voldemort.

Crossover? Parody? Fanfic? All of the above? When Hogwarts meets The Colbert Report, anything goes!

As the Quidditch Championship game approaches, the teachers in the staff room sit around being competitive, tense, or -in the rare case of Remus Lupin- placidly amused and content. For once, the problem person at Hogwarts is not the DADA teacher, and everyone is very happy about it... except Snape. Of course, we can't count him because he's rarely ever happy about anything that everyone else in the staff is happy about. Rated R for horror and sexual content- no, I'm kidding. This is a child safe story, ladies and gentlemen.

Draco's friends torment him using their own remixed version of The Little Mermaid's "Kiss the Girl." Chaos ensues.

Draco Malfoy wants to become the most perfect prefect in Hogwarts history. His only source for help? An annoying Gryffindor who's much more perfect than Malfoy thinks. How does the rigorous training work for Malfoy, though?

Harry was always going to be victorious. [Harry/Draco]

Draco and Hermione play a dangerous game of 'what if'. Winner at the Firewhiskey funny fic challenge for July!

Lavender and Parvati find a strange bunny on Hogwarts grounds that makes all kinds of mad-cap schemes come true. When they realize what is creating the chaos, they call in the one person they know they could count on... Professor Trelawney. Will the Divination Professor, Lavender and Parvati be able to save the school? Expect to see Mary Sue babysitting kid!Snape, Dumbledore, and McGonagall, Loving Harry and has no idea why!Draco, The Next Dark Lord! Hermione, and of course, Player!Neville.

A very long comedy. Will Harry ever get back his identity stolen by his evil twin? Will Voldemort ever get into the Lava Lamp club? Will the evil chipmunk stop Harry's quest?Why did Percy eat the Book of the Dead? Will Dudley ever find love?

Revenge is a dish best tasted cold. Sequel to Tiny Bubbles. Snape strikes back.

Once upon a time there was a group of individuals more powerful than the average person. They decided to form a band of which the likes had never been seen. Fabulous secret powers were revealed to them the day that held aloft their magic wands and said, "By the power of Cheese Monkeys, I am Mary Sue!" ``And then Albus Dumbledore and the rest of the canon characters chucked 'em out of the school.

Harry's been behaving very strangely. Hermione comes up with several theories, and a few interesting plans, but is she missing the point? And Ron's far too clueless to be any real use, isn't he?

What happens when you mix Monty Python's The Search for the Holy Grail and Harry Potter? A lot of scary plotlines, and a lot of fun!

This is the second in a series of stories attempting to explain some rather obvious names in the Harry Potter series. The first is Remus Lupin; this one is Sirius Black.

(Formerly known as Baby? What Baby?) Hermione Granger gives birth to a boy (she thinks). Some people know, but her friends do not. See her try to survive the absolute insanity and danger of Hogwarts with a baby to "take care of." Definitely not canon-compliant. CAUTION: This story contains language, crude humor, sexual references, and a crazy old man.

Ever wonder what went on in the Marauder's heads after they pranked, while they studied, at random parts of the day? Yes, you see what I'm getting at. All those crazy thoughts in drabble form. Short, sweet, and funny - just like them. Except for sweet.

Draco's been known to stretch the truth, but this time he goes too far: the whole school thinks he's dating Harry Potter. Harry tries to quash the rumors, Hermione counsels him on his sexuality, and Harry Potter might just have the teeniest crush on Draco Malfoy.

When James gets his hands on a rather colorful romance novel, owned by a certain Miss Lily Evans, can he survive the ensuing storm and get his Lily too?

Voldemort has been defeated for a second time. Draco Malfoy is miserable and on the run. Can Draco fix the problem by stopping the first fall? Or are there unintended consequences? And what does dancing have to do with any of this?

Ginny has accidentally turned in a diary entry of hers to… Professor Snape. Now how will she get out of this predicament? What grade is she going to get? But most of all what was going to happen when he calls her into his office? And what is going on in the Professor's mind?

What happens when the Marauders “take notes” during History of Magic class?

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Still, Harry might have more on his hands than he bargained for if it weren't for his Slytherin side...

Well this is a toughy. This is very hard to explain because, well it's Mokey. Lots of weirdness involved, you think it's normal? Well it's not! Next chapter will be better. Unless no one reviews and then no more chapters! Lots of Britney, Justin, and Joey goodness. ESPECIALLY MOKEY! (he's new!)

Snape finally gets the slappin he deserves.

Hermione and Draco are...drumroll, please!...Head Boy and Head Girl.

It's the best feeling in the world, our palms sweaty, your breathing erratic, but then you pick up that black and white electric guitar and nothing else seems to matter.

Reg says diaries are for girls, but he doesn't know what he's talking about. First of all, girls can't write, everybody knows that (except Regulus, but what does he know?), and second, this isn't a diary. It's a journal. That's something totally different. A journal of my super-cool life--This is the very first sentence Sirius Black writes in his Diary/journal in his first year at Hogwarts. Other years will follow.

Tom Riddle's careers advice session.

"Number 12 Grimmauld Place was silent. However, as the Fates saw, Christmas was not going to be a quiet affair." DHr, HG, Oneshot.

Ever wonder what would happen if you mixed the Andrew Llyod Webber musical 'Cats' with J.K. Rowling's 'Harry Potter' series? Well, here's the answer: Cats... Harry Potter Style. You'll see the characters as you've never seen them before... in full cat costume, including wig, makeup, and unitard while singing, dancing, jumping, twirling, spinning, and falling all over the stage. Set in the beautiful location of the Hogwarts School junkyard, this fic will truly be one you'll never forget.

A story about love and rum! Think your evening was bad? Have you ever seen one at Hogwarts after the drinks are passed around?

What happened to Percy after Minister Fudge sent him to owl the Daily Prophet about 'Dumbledore's Army'? And what happens when he bumps into a certain pair of brothers?

Let's face it: Snape is nasty to his students, especially if they are unlucky enough to be in Gryffindor. And what do the parents do? Meet Frances Spencer, Muggle mum of a Gryffindor first-year, facing the challenge of unfair teachers and the wizarding postal service...

"Saving the world before bedtime, it's...the Harrypuff Kids!" The dreaded Harry Potter/Powerpuff Girls crossover with Mayor!Dumbledore and MojoJojo!Voldemort.

Hermione anxiously awaits her O.W.L. results but gets an unexpected surprise instead.

Neville Longbottom has a secret love ... and it's Severus Snape! But does Snape feel the same about Neville? And exactly how do they convey their feelings through song anyway? A parody of Rodgers' & Hammerstein's musical "The Sound of Music"

This is what happened when the characters of Harry potter met Caroline Skeeter Hogwarts new school shrink.

So, this is from the point of view of Lockhart's Mirror!! :) Poor thing, you know it gets used a lot!

Ron has played one too many practical jokes on his sister. Ginny's revenge is oh so sweet.

Draco teaches Harry how to dance.

Voldemort pays a visit to Harry but ends up flirting shamelessly with Aunt Petunia! Honestly, carrying on like a couple of teenagers....

In which James and Lily get married, Sirius gets maudlin, Remus gets put-upon and everyone gets drunk.

A series of short stories written by different authors about, as the title says, Ron Weasley being humiliated in several unusual situations. :)

It started as a joke, then, six months later, turned into a full blown prank. With only Snape left in charge, how will Harry, Ron, and Hermione survive this one?

Viktor Krum never was one to revel in posing, primping, preening, being fawned or drooled over, or generally being manhandled and treated like a piece of meat by the so-called "fairer sex" that count themselves among his fandom. He's not much on being photographed or answering the same old questions or having his private life pried into, either, thanks very much. So when he gets *cough* volunteered by a certain bushy-haired fiancee to participate in a fundraiser for St. Mungo's that involves all of the above and then some... Let's just say Hermione will be needing to "express her gratitude" a great deal to make up for this.

Someone tries to fulfill their “Final Battle” story requirement with disastrous results.

Don't say I didn't warn you. Harry gets an invitation to a marvellous party; Malfoy resorts to double entendre.

Hermione is not yet in Hogwarts, and doesn't even know about it. She's none too happy with her life, and wants some change!

Halo addicts, verbal romances, a considerably intelligent four year old and mistold adventures, this a fiction for anybody who's ever been on a long bus ride to enjoy! Just wait to say: "That's SO true" to nearly every line! This is a Crack!Fic of epic proportions for anybody who's ever been on a good, long bus ride!

Back by popular demand, the second installment of Siofra and Company includes just as much insanity as the original. Siofra and the girls are back, but this time the universal rift throws the ultimate switch: The Harry Potter characters are thrown into our universe. Will they blow the secret of the existence of the wizarding world? Will Siofra and Kiara ever be civil to one another? And where exactly is everyone going to sleep?

Neville and Luna visit Ron and Hermione, and while Hermione is out shopping, Ron plays chess with Luna. Little does he know that Luna doesn't play chess quite like anyone Ron's ever played.

James Potter is waiting for the Hogwarts Express to take him to Hogwarts for his first year of school. He's got no friends, a large trunk, and a kitten. And a little bit of advice from his mother.

Dumbledore's mind is rotting. The time has come for bad stuff to happen! A stupid 5th year adventure with weird stuff, guest appearances, and an "incident".

Mary Sue has written a short memoir to give readers a chance to see into her amazing world. Learn about her entrance into the Hogwarts world and her lasting impact on those who are enthralled by her presence.

Sherlock!Sirius strikes again. Sequel to "The Case of the Misplaced Satisfaction."

'Have fun Harry, Ron!' Tonks waved enthusiastically, her eyes glittering merrily. 'Don’t mess your trousers!' Harry and Ron are sharing a surprise birthday gift... but in the company of Tonks and the Weasley twins?!

Ever wonder how the Order of the Phoenix does its recruiting? Do all Order members enjoy their duties? Of course! There's nothing more thrilling than hanging out in a house full of Dark artifacts, or staring at a door, right? (...Yeah.) This is the previously untold story of the less exciting aspects of Order life, as recorded by three drunkards, and discovered by a serious-minded young woman who was in need of a reality check.

Voldemort has brainwashed Ron! How far will Hermione go to save him?

Fred and George are quite the prankster pair, but as far as Ron and Hermione are concerned, they’ve played their last joke.

Lucius is tired of Narcissa's nagging and decides to go and have a few drinks at the Three Broomsticks. Who does he run into? None other than Hermione Granger, of course, who is equally tired of her husband Ron's incessant talk of Quidditch. Can these two former enemies find something interesting to do while they pass the time away from their significant others?

It was one of those ginger-haired boys that lived up the road. Everyone in the village knew the Weasleys and their backward kids. Thankfully, they all went to some ‘special’ school up north during the year, so the only time she had to put up with them was during the summer holidays.

Dudley Dursley is relaxing in a deck chair when Luna Lovegood 'floats' above him on her thestral, Sootyhoof.... The two have an interesting conversation.

Angry with Harry, Ron wishes he never came to Hogwarts. Some wishes just shouldn't come true...

It is finally happening. Tom Riddle will gleefully watch Harry Potter’s downfall from a front-row seat. And it’s all thanks to Moaning Myrtle. The first, as far as I can see, romantic pairing between Moaning Myrtle and Tom Riddle. LEGAL NOTICE: The author assumes no liability for side-splitting, pants wetting or other trauma associated with uncontrollable laughter.

Lord Voldemort's grand scheme to destroy the Weasley Family is brought to a brief halt whenever she invites him in for tea.

Luna Lovegood gets an unexpected visitor knocking at her door on Old Hallow's Eve...

An Ode to Hermione and Her Brush. Anyway, this is a rant from Hermione's pink, unhappy, hairbrush. *grins*

The diary of Draco Malfoy. Read his quipping insults, sulking complaints, his secret lover, his suicidal urges, his bits about Crabbe sleepwalking without anything on, and his secret desire to see Harry in the changing room. It's not what you think! Draco/Hermione, Harry/Hermione, and a bit of reference toward Draco/Harry. A bit slashy.

What is Luna's extra credit assignment with Snape, and why are they taking off their clothes? No, it's not what you think.

Dumbledore had his reasons for locking Sirius up in his own house. But what reasons does Black himself have for going quite, quite mad?

Now that the Evil Sorting Hat has decided to get revenge on Draco, Hermione has to learn to tolerate him for six weeks.

The Marauders are all telling stories... yet they all seem to make fun of James. But then the stories start to come true. Coincidence? Magic? ``I think not. Sirius? Well, now.

Did you ever wonder what would happen if the world of Harry Potter collided with the world of Star Trek? Well, I did...and out came this.

Not too keen on American Idol? Can't blame you, but wait until you see the Potter version! Draco hosts with an all-new panel of Judges; no appearances by Simon, Randy, OR Paula! Contestants range from random students, to boys-who-lived, to former Hogwarts Professors. And, of course, you won't want to miss the scathing remarks of the judge-with-a-grudge, who is so diabolically British, it's almost sexy. Guess who?

Draco uses Harry over and over, and Harry isn't exactly pleased. Harry wants Draco to stay forever, but that isn't happening. Unless. . . Written for McTabby's Blame challenge

The world of fairy tales and the wizarding world collides when Snow White suddenly ends up in the Burrow. With Naked!Draco, Er!Ron, the rest of the Weasleys and crazy fairy tale characters.