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Bottoms Up by TheTreacleTart
05/16/2004

It's the morning after and Snape and Lupin find they share an odd inclination. Slash, SS/RL.

Words: 4,773
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,352

Hermione has been acting a little weird lately... Running around school, shagging ALL the Quidditch players! But what happens when she gets a...disease? How does Malfoy factor in to all of this? What's a boy (who lived) to do?

Words: 10,403
Chapters: 7
Hits: 2,348

What happens when an obsessive, Potterholic fanfiction writer and her friends get transported to the Potterverse? A lot of tripping, people falling off of their seats, mad conversations with the author, omnipotent Dumbledore, and a misunderstood Malfoy. Let the pure insanity begin!

Words: 15,964
Chapters: 5
Hits: 2,347

One-shot! Draco takes Harry shopping and encounters a rather flirtacious muggle.

Words: 1,111
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,345

After an apallingly bad day, Ron gets the news that Hermione is going on a date with Viktor Krum. Driving by jealousy, Ron blackmails a reluctant Harry into helping him spy on Hermione and Krum\'s date. Secret spy names, tantalizing secrets, and insanity abound as Ron discovers his true feelings and Harry only gets more confused.

Words: 5,490
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,343

4 years after graduation, Harry opens a detective agency..What are the cases he has to deal with? Find out what really happened the day he defeated Voldemort, and what are the consequences of listening to a Muggle schizophrenic...

Words: 2,386
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,343

A fic about when the Marauders become friends with Lily. Some humour, some adventure, some nakedness! (but quite mild)

Words: 2,754
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,339
April Fool by a_is_for_amy
03/25/2004

Ginny and the Gryffindor sixth-years play an April Fool's Day joke on Ron and Hermione in the hopes of getting them together once and for all. Fun and fluffy!

Words: 5,367
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,324

It was the prank of the century, a million things could have gone wrong! Most do, when the Gryffindor Women decide it's time to teach the Marauders a trick or two.

Words: 8,338
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,324

A journalist comes to Hogwarts to interview people! How interesting! Includes no dark secrets, some really out of character persons. May include things not appropriate for children under eight, such as Snape in bunny pajamas and green and silver rubber ducks.

Words: 7,563
Chapters: 6
Hits: 2,324

Harry enters a contest to sing...a rap song by Eminem, star Muggle rap artist. He finds out about other surprising entries, too. Lots of fun.

Words: 4,215
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,315

In the sequel to 'The Grandfather Paradox' and 'Future Shock,' it is now ten years after Wesley's strange arrival at Hogwarts. Voldemort has fallen, and everyone is getting on with their lives. Why is Wesley arranging to leave England, however?

Words: 12,001
Chapters: 7
Hits: 2,315
I Dream of Fandom by Diricawl
04/05/2004

The inhabitants of Hogwarts are having trouble sleeping. Why? Because of nightmares, of course. But not just any nightmares; they\'re dreaming about the Fandom, and that\'s enough to scare anyone. No one\'s going to be sleeping tonight...

Words: 6,389
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,311
Scam of the Century by Adel
02/25/2005

My name is Hermione Granger, and I'm about to screw Draco Malfoy out of just over 160 million galleons. Take that split 11 ways- you do the math.

Words: 3,486
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,308

House elves have watched the residents of Hogwarts for years. This is the retelling of a sticky love triangle between Harry, Ginny and Draco from the perspective of a dedicated house elf.

Words: 7,547
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,306

To throw off the Death Eaters, Harry, Hermione, Ron and Ginny are staying at Hermione’s house for the summer. When Ron sees Hermione’s computer, it sparks questions, explanations and ego searches. What happens when they discover that there are six million, two hundred and forty thousand matches for Harry’s name?

Words: 3,278
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,306

In a Hogwarts student’s Seventh Year, the weeks between the last NEWT exam and the end of term usually seem like they’ll never end! But when the Norse Trickster God, Loki, curses Ron Weasley with nine lives, the Slytherins decide that Ron needs to die -- repeatedly. Hey, it’s something to do! They devise a contest to see who can kill Weasley in the most embarrassing fashion. Who will win the contest, and how will Harry feel when it's Draco's turn?

Words: 14,066
Chapters: 5
Hits: 2,302

Voldemort as Scrooge? See what happens when the ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future pay the Dark Lord a visit on Christmas Eve. Featuring TinyTim!Ginny, a Malfoy family Christmas, Arthur Weasley (as Bob Cratchit) as Lord Voldemort’s clerk, and a cameo by the Dursleys. Also past Tom/Minerva.

Words: 15,461
Chapters: 5
Hits: 2,291

Before 5th year, Dudley approaches Harry in his bedroom to show him something interesting... GOD NO!!! It's just a book! Namely, *the* book. See how Harry reacts when Dudley shows him this and another secret... H/G, uh... something... No smut or fluff or anything gross like that.

Words: 4,307
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,281

It is a cold, wintry Christmas Eve during Harry's sixth year. The sixth years, in various states of depression, are lounging about the common room when Neville bursts in clutching a copy of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. Curious, the sixth years decide to read it. Hilarity and pervertedness ensue.

Words: 26,760
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,280
Hogwarts Juniors by Grey_Eyes
03/21/2005

Meet Ginny and the rest of the Hogwarts kids in pre-school as toddlers! AU.

Words: 5,166
Chapters: 5
Hits: 2,279
Never Alone by Ramzes
02/18/2008

DH SPOILERS! Follow the first steps of the kids from the new generation when they leave for Hogwarts. Teddy, Victoire, James, Fred, Albus, and Lily have their own fears, hopes... and chapters.

Words: 8,641
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,278

Roll up! Roll up! Be the first to get your hands on Delphinius' Delights Special Edition Chocolate Frog Cards depicting the heroes of two Wizarding Wars!

Words: 4,090
Chapters: 7
Hits: 2,275

A ficlet written in honor of Hermione's birthday. Ron and Harry plan a birthday surprise.

Words: 4,767
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,275

A humorous parody of the clichéd fanfics you've read and grown to despise. A Fanfiction author gets sucked into the Lands of Harry Potter Clichés. There is a plot of sorts, despite heavy doses of silliness. Some Mary Sue bashing.

Words: 6,187
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,275

Do you enjoy Snape's makeovers? If so, don't read. He's supposed to be a greasy-haired, yellow-teethed and sallow-skinned Potions Master and I'm depriving him of those attributes. Why? Because he's in love, obviously.

Words: 1,609
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,274

Severus goes exploring in his new Animagus form and finds more than he bargained for. Slash RL/SS.

Words: 10,194
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,272

James tries to explain to Lily why the tongue is a useful tool in CPR, a fact he learned from Sirius and Remus. Takes place in their fifth year.

Words: 816
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,261

A parody of Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss.

Words: 686
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,261
Those Girly Things by Sabelle
09/30/2005

Harry's on a mission. But it has nothing to do with Voldemort. Instead, he has found himself running a rather embarrassing errand for a certain redheaded witch...

Words: 1,185
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,255

Sequel to "Harry Potter and the Muggle Toy Store". What would happen if Harry Potter found out about the "Harry Potter" movie? What would happen if everyone thought he was Daniel Radcliffe? Cameos by Darling Little Elsie and her mother, Mummy! A barrel of laughs!

Words: 1,547
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,250

This is Dennis Creevey's diary, in which he tells of his plans to be a playah. Lovable Dennis, though, falls a little short in this satire of pop culture.

Words: 1,071
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,245
Strip by Winged Dragon
04/24/2002

The Marauders and Co. are sitting around playing a bit of strip poker.

Words: 2,511
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,245

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a LUCIUS! In order to obtain top performance from your Senior Death Eater, please follow the procedures detailed in this manual.

Words: 1,340
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,242

The two rivals set aside their differences and have a little fun. They even rebel against authority (Dumbledore). (Harry/Draco) This story is AU

Words: 2,010
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,238

One day a guy decided he was bored enough to make his own fic at 2 in the morning...that made no sense whatsoever.

Words: 738
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,234
What's A DIT?? by Gumlick
12/12/2002

Ginny wants to become a Deatheater because she is sick and tired of being poor and everyone judging her just based on that factor. Draco is the lucky one who gets to train her.

Words: 4,582
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,233
The Switch by Malfoyman
08/19/2003

Harry wakes up late for Divination one morning, and due to a faulty Crystal Ball, is sent to the time of the Marauders, while James is sent to the present.

Words: 2,744
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,229

Sirius Black finds a Muggle radio while searching among the backyard shed of the Potters. With a mind like his, who knows what shall ensue? Who dares to find out?

Words: 3,350
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,228

Lucius Malfoy, Voldemort's right-hand wizard, fancies fancy script; his son fancies it's too difficult to read. Sometimes, a few small letters make a very big difference. [H/D slash]

Words: 1,607
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,227

We've all heard this: "Malfoy swaggered forward and got his wish at once: the hat had barely touched his head when it screamed, "SLYTHERIN!" What if that hadn't happened? What if, instead, the hat had yelled something else?

Words: 2,179
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,226

Severus and Sirius start fighting over a newspaper article. Remus has a migraine and doesn't like the noise at all. Severus finds out just why Remus is being so moody. Sirius finds it out, too, and faints. Two times. In the end, everything is okay - at least if Severus gets some chocolate for Remus SOON....

Words: 1,625
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,222

There is one Christmas tradition that Snape dislikes more than Christmas dinner . . . and this year, tradition has caught up with Severus Snape.

Words: 623
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,218
CATastrophe by AliceMione
05/06/2003

Can you imagine a way how Draco Malfoy ends up willingly in Harry Potter's arms? No slash! No Quidditch accident! Both of them being in character! Well, go and find out!

Words: 7,162
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,217

In an alternate universe, members of the Order (including Harry, Hermione, Ginny, Neville and Luna) gather for an evening's relaxation. Pretty much everyone ends up naked. Don't worry, Dumbledore doesn't attend.

Words: 1,126
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,213

Last time we left book 4 Cedric was dead...now find out what happens at his wake. Cho is upset, Roger Davies gets lucky, Ginny fights shipping wars with Pansy, Draco has a new business enterprise, Fudge gets his hands on Book 5, Lucius almost reveals his secret love, Ron discusses wand length, Fred and George are on a quest, Sirius gambles, Harry finds out who really killed his parents and a special someone makes a guest appearance.

Words: 4,026
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,212

What could possibly be called a sequel to A Tale Of Little Plot. You don't have to read that first. This one makes even less sense, and, as the title suggests, has no plot. At all. There may be smidgens of a plot at some point, but they tend to get forgotten about.

Words: 4,845
Chapters: 7
Hits: 2,203

It's raining. The Weasley kids are mad at Percy, who has just returned to the family. Harry needs some fun and smiles. What better way to cure all of these than a good old-fashioned game of Truth or Dare?

Words: 2,603
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,199

Dum de DUM! You asked for it, and here it is, the sequel to Stuck in a Room With You and The Obsession with Duck-Duck-Goose! Snape's starting to get annoying (duh) and Sirius is starting to be more annoying! Needless to say, things get interesting!

Words: 718
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,193

The Founders in the Sorting Hat return to sort the most... marauding generation yet.

Words: 4,560
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,189

This is another of my 'Magic Quill dictation' fics. We all read about Harry's careers advice session, but the other students must have had them. Here's Crabbe's.

Words: 1,778
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,184

Our favorite Dark Wizard (besides Voldie, of course!) has written a "How-to" book. Lots of demons, sacrificing, Exceedingly Difficult things, evil magical creatures, and most importantly, dark magic!

Words: 972
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,182

Six people walk in on James and Sirius doing...something. But what is it that they're actually doing?

Words: 879
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,180

Poking fun at the menagerie of relationships in the Harry Potter fanfic world!

Words: 5,266
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,176

Harry finally turns 17 and has now been granted his inheritance.

Words: 1,410
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,175

'Lover's Got Your Lips' sequel. Sixteen years later, it's a Weasley family pre-Hogwarts reunion. Lover's Got Your Lips reappear, so Molly takes matters into her own hands and teaches the twins a lesson they'll never forget.

Words: 1,086
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,170
Chasing Voldemort by Alanna B
03/21/2002

Harry chases Voldemort through the streets of his neighborhood. Will he ever catch him? It'll keep you at the edge of your seat till the end!

Words: 739
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,167

A variant of an idea from Christmas of Surprises (AT, 10 chapters) in which Ron and Hermione do decide to tell his parents they\\\'re now lovers. This isn\\\'t part of that story\\\'s continuity though, it\\\'s just one way things could have happened. Ron/Hermione, obviously. Set eight months after the end of Christmas of Surprises just to confuse people.

Words: 3,835
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,165

When you go to school with the Marauders, there is never a quiet day. But, today, not a sound can be heard! Something must be up...

Words: 1,112
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,161

JKR has so far told us nothing about Luna's years at Hogwarts before we meet her as a fourth-year student. Has she known the secret of the Half-Blood Prince all along? This story consists of six vignettes from Luna's life. Each takes place during the time-frame of one of the existing Harry Potter novels (well, the first takes place the summer after book one), and the last takes place during the summer before the book we are currently anxiously waiting for. Make your waiting a little easier by reading my story to see what Luna might know about the mysterious Half-Blood Prince.

Words: 6,263
Chapters: 6
Hits: 2,160

Fred and George come across something interesting while wandering the halls of Hogwarts...

Words: 337
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,160
Future Shock by James_Bow
11/29/2002

In the sequel to The Grandfather Paradox, Ron and Hermione's son from the future adapts to life in his new home. Or tries to.

Words: 10,779
Chapters: 5
Hits: 2,160

Tonks asks Remus for a favor, involving a dinner party and several pieces of silverware. Remus did say it himself: loads of people eating and himself just don\'t work out...

Words: 5,464
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,159

1981. Bill Weasley has dragged his father to Headingley to watch the baffling Muggle sport of Quikket. The odds on England beating Australia are 500-1 against. But Voldemort is at the height of his powers, and just as the England captain thinks his problems couldn't possibly get any worse the Dark Mark appears over the Kirkstall Lane End.

Words: 9,385
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,154

A silly one-shot, as Remus tells the story of how Harry and Ginny got engaged at Harry's Bachelor Party.

Words: 897
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,150

The war is over, Voldemort is dead, and romance is in the air! Severus and Hermione find love thanks to a meddling Dumbledore, but everything they do seems oddly familiar… An SS/HG parody featuring Severus angst, a whiskey-drinking Hermione, a sarcastic narrator, neo-Death Eaters, potions, tea, books, transparent plot devices, Draco Malfoy in leather pants, talking familiars, amber ringlets, butt-hugging jeans, and a sextacular Pagan wedding.

Words: 4,770
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,140
I'm Shagging Who? by Kyizi
08/05/2004

The characters of Harry Potter discover fanfic, and some of them are less than receptive to some of the pairings. Others, however....

Words: 3,029
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,140
Baseball Slash by PhoenixSong
06/12/2007

Harry gets drunk on Fenway Park beer. Draco gets in a fight with a Red Sox fan. Voldemort plays shortstop for the Yankees. Fun is had by all. (Crackfic!Warning: Contains Americanisms, beer, peanuts, Highly Improbable Coincidences, more beer, bumbling villains, and a blatant self-insert. Ships are Harry/Draco, and unresolved Jeter/A-Rod. Fic takes place on July 31st, 2001.)

Words: 4,232
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,136

Harry, Ron, and Hermione are determined to find out what their professors are doing in the staff room. When they find out...

Words: 1,831
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,136

An article in The Daily Prophet regarding the Tremendous Trio sparks another round of gossip at Hogwarts.

Words: 7,796
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,132

Hermione becomes Snape's confidante as he suffers a mental breakdown; much hilarity ensues.

Words: 8,384
Chapters: 6
Hits: 2,129
Centerfold by purelush
09/26/2007

Severus Snape gets a surprise when he opens his naughty magazine.

Words: 613
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,124

Ron slips up with a dirty word in front of his nieces, and Hermione declares an unsettling ultimatum until he improves his language. ONESHOT. RonHermione. HarryGinny. PostVoldemort.

Words: 3,277
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,123

Shameless parody of poor Shakespeare with abriged and unabriged verses, demented casting and lots of silly things

Words: 7,536
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,122

When Ron's curiosity gets the best of him and he "borrows" Lavender's ``magazines, he and his roommates spend a rather interesting evening learning more ``than they ever wanted to know about girls- and themselves.

Words: 2,415
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,116

Honestly! Who is in charge of Occupational Health & Safety at the Ministry? Brains in tanks and unmarked dimensional portals! In this little trial transcript, Sirius' estate gets litigious, Fudge talks facial hair, Lucius struggles with life in the clink, and Albus Dumbledore has only one buttock. Naturally.

Words: 1,413
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,116

Following the events of "Slightly Off-Kilter" and set roughly during the later part of Harry's fifth year and early sixth year, Gayle and Severus try to reinfiltrate the Death Eaters to find out what's up. Well, Gayle does anyway... Severus is a less than enthusiastic party to the fiasco. The "return" of Gayle's insanity adds chaos to the mix and no one is more surprised than Severus when her nuttiness may just pay off. Gayle, of course, had faith in the powers of insanity...

Words: 12,766
Chapters: 7
Hits: 2,112
The Transfer by Lals
06/23/2002

The Marauders are bemoaning their unlucky romance lives when a gorgeous American transfer comes in. What will happen?

Words: 12,799
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,109

Sequel to that heartwarming classic, 'Harry Potter and the Year of Living Stupidly'. Voldemort has been defeated, so what's the Boy-Who-Lived to do? Can he continue to be the most special person in the wizarding world without his arch-nemesis to contend with? You can bet he'll try! And Harry's not the only one having bad ideas this year! This is the story to read if you want to see just how crazy life at Hogwarts can get!

Words: 23,949
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,108
Topsy-Turvy by Jondar
08/17/2001

The trio return to the Gryffindor common room to find things looking slightly different.

Words: 273
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,105

While JK Rowling is taking her sweet time publishing the Order of the Phoenix, we decided to take the story into our own hands. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Just for fun, imagine this is an audio book. Or not - it's really up to you.

Words: 5,839
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,105
Oral Sex by Isiscolo
04/18/2003

At Harry's wedding, Sirius and Severus toast each other's health. Sort of. Repeatedly.

Words: 1,468
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,104

The Weasley clan, plus quite a few others, are spending a quiet Christmas together. Quiet? No, that's not the right word. Not for a Weasley Christmas. No romances or ships but there is plenty of fun, dragons and things that go BOOM!

Words: 9,741
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,104

Really, it was just a bit of fun. Lily didn’t have to yell so much! Harry was fine; he enjoyed the fresh winter air. ``Sirius takes his young godson outside for a bit of play. Lily doesn’t approve of Sirius’ cure of boredom and James finds it all highly amusing.

Words: 3,102
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,101
Broken Friends by Patrick
07/04/2004

Molly Weasley forbade her children from ever talking to Harry Potter. Ginny disobeyed her, and married Harry. Now, years later, she wants to make up.

Words: 6,706
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,101

What happens when the Marauders fall in love? You get a dating Remus, Molly Weasley's diary, Peter actually thinking - and Sirius has a new girl!

Words: 2,856
Chapters: 5
Hits: 2,093

One night in the unspecified future, Ron spots Harry and Hermione sneaking out of Gryffindor Tower. Curious, he follows, until someone hexes him from behind and takes him to an unused classroom....

Words: 729
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,092

The Gryffindor girls play truth or dare. What else can you expect but hilarity?

Words: 1,961
Chapters: 1
Hits: 2,091

Andromeda has plenty reasons why her life's over. Her sister's an evil Death Eater, her family can trace itself to the founding of EVIL, and on top of it all, she has an insatiable crush on Ted Tonks. Oh, to be a Black...

Words: 7,988
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,082

Snape has a stalker who is sending him some... er, interesting love letters. Snape's point of view.

Words: 1,304
Chapters: 2
Hits: 2,072

What would happen if a laptop computer infiltrated Hogwarts and the students found FanFiction.net on Google? Rated PG for fairly mild, mostly implied slash. RW/HG, HP/DM, HP/RW, RL/SS, JP/SB, FW/GW, HP/TR, D/W, and HP/GW are all players. (I think I got them all.)

Words: 10,382
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,071

What happens when Beth and Veronica get somehow transported to Harry Potter World? Mayhem! Madness! Includes Lord Chickenmort, an extremely annoyed Snape. Torture by singing and much more! The girls are perfectly normal... Deep, deep down inside.

Words: 5,848
Chapters: 5
Hits: 2,068

Sirius, Remus, Peter, and James have a notebook that they all write notes to each other in. Find out what happens to them during their school years through its pages.

Words: 5,445
Chapters: 8
Hits: 2,066
Harry's Potion by Dementress
11/14/2004

Thanks to a malfunctioned potion, Harry and Hermione are forced to view life in a different perspective. Not your ordinary Freaky Friday plot! Warning: may bust lungs and cause sore butts.

Words: 7,717
Chapters: 4
Hits: 2,063

Unusual pairing of Ron/Neville. In their seventh year they are used as an experiment of an alternative unforgivable curse by the dark side. Includes Ron's blunt humour and accidental and embarassing situations for poor old Severus Snape.

Words: 21,772
Chapters: 9
Hits: 2,058
Grr. Argh. by saava
10/06/2002

Hermione and Draco are sucked into a world filled with zombies by a Convenient Plot Device. Watch them fight evil! Watch them kiss! Watch them fight more evil! Not quite as absurd as it sounds.

Words: 5,067
Chapters: 3
Hits: 2,052