What are You Doing?

LILY

I was walking down the hall with Arabella, chatting about the usual-James. "So, do you think he likes me?" I'd always ask.

"Of course he does," Arabella would always say. I'd chat about the day's worries with her, and she'd give her sage advice. Today, the problem was Sirius.

"Sometimes Sirius is so annoying, and James doesn't even defend me. Like last week. Sirius put six Peppermint Imps in my shepherd's pie, and when steam started coming out of my ears, James just laughed! Not defending me, laughing at me! What am I to do?" I was clearly annoyed.

"Lils, chill out," Arabella told me. "It's no big deal, he's just being stupid as usual. I mean, how many fifth-year guys do you know that are actually serious?"

"All right, all right," I consented as we arrived at the portrait hole door.

"Magic monkeys," I said to the Fat Lady.

The portrait swung open, and we stepped in. Suddenly we saw Sirius and James. I saw Peter at the stairs, with Genevieve behind him. I shrieked.

"Oh, my gosh!" I cried. "James, what are you doing?!"

REMUS

I'd just gotten back from staying in the Shrieking Shack, and Madam Pomfrey told me to go up to my dormitory and rest. My arms were still aching from all that running, plus James and Sirius hadn't even bothered to stay for when I transformed back...mumbled something about "too much homework." The day I see Sirius not copy homework is the day I'll teach Defense Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts, I thought to myself.

"Oooh, look who's back, it's little wolfie," Peeves mocked me as he shoved a bit of gum on the back edge of The Fat Lady's portrait.

"Peeves, shut up, and please take that gum off. I'd like to get into my common room at some point today." I gave him a bored look I had perfected in the last year when I joked with James and Sirius.

"Not until you say the magic word..." Peeves taunted.

"You want a magic word?" I said maliciously. "Here's a magic word for you: Waddiwasi!" The gum flew off the frame and directly into Peeves's nose. Moaning, Peeves flew away, saying, "I'll get you for that, Loony Lupin..."

Smiling to myself, I stated the password and stepped inside as the portrait hole opened. When I did, I bumped right into Lily and Arabella.

"What's going on?" I asked. Lily pointed at James and Sirius, who were looking guilty.

"I knew you weren't doing homework, but WHAT are you doing?"

PETER

I had been studying Potions (that evil git Andres had assigned another two-roll essay on Polyjuice), wondering why James hadn't come up to tutor me yet. I'd gotten about a quarter of the way down on the first parchment when I realized that if he didn't help me, I was probably going to fail the assignment. Maybe I'll just wait for him in the common room, I thought to myself. Opening the door, I strolled down the stairs, but I heard voices from below that sounded undoubtedly like James and Sirius.

"Oh, I got that one right there-"

"That feels so good-"

Wondering what they were doing, I jogged the rest of the way, with Genevieve behind me, making it down just in time to see Lily come through the portrait hole.

Just as she said, "What-" I put in, "Ew, what are you DOING? That's not right!"

GENEVIEVE

"Love Potion Number Niine..." I sang to myself. I was braiding my hair in my dormitory when I heard a voice say, "This is so fun. We should bond more often, you know that, Sirius?" I recognized the voice as James Potter's. Curious as to how they were 'bonding,' I finished the 'do and strolled toward the staircase. I ran down behind Peter, right at his heels. I made it to the bottom after he did, and heard Lily, my roommate, finish "-are you doing?" with a horror in her voice. I must say, with the circumstances being what they were, I had to go with the crowd here

"Honestly, what are you DOING?"

ARTHUR

I had just been on a date with Molly. I was returning from the Astronomy Tower, where we had been snogging, when I saw Lily and Arabella walk by me. Probably coming back from dinner, I thought to myself, as I walked behind them on the way to the common room. I knew this, of course, with my superior Head Boy knowledge (the knowledge my brothers had mocked me with), and so I stated the password right after Remus Lupin had, making my way into the crowded doorway. Pushing everyone aside, I saw what they were staring at. I couldn't contain myself.

"Ugh! How disgusting! I ought to deduct ten points right now from both of you!"

JAMES

We were just sitting there, going about our usual 'alone time' business when it became 'not so alone time.' There must have been six other people, and we hung our heads as it came from all directions-"What are you doing?"

I looked guiltily up at Sirius. "I guess everyone knows our secret now, huh?" I asked.

Sirius nodded. "Apparently..." he mumbled, then went back to picking his nose.