641 - 660 of 3,602 Stories

Sirius is entertained as Lily and James bicker over baby names, coming to a startling revelation followed by paradoxical conclusion.

Snape and Percy discuss cauldron bottoms. A short, slashy innuendo-filled one-shot.

The war is over and Harry Potter conquered He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Great, we got it already, but Ginny Weasley is still wrapped up in a dilemma because of Lord Voldy-squashed [Drum Roll!]: when deranged Lucius Malfoy captures Harry hostage and demands to know the sex of Blaise Zabini, the threat forces Ginny to accept help from Draco Malfoy in order to save everyone's favorite boy-hero; little did Loony Lucius know he'd make the odd couple reface a dark, dark secret from their pasts in order to succeed...

Draco has cast a spell, and as a result the whole school now spontaneously breaks into song. Mayhem ensues as the students--and even the teachers--find themselves unable to conceal even their deepest secrets. Rated PG-13 for violence, scary scenes, and mild language. Based on the Buffy the Vampire Slayer musical by the same name.

It's Valentine's Day and Harry is acting very VERY strangely. How strangely? You be the judge! Short one-shot.

Were you upset by the vague, mysterious, and corny ending to your favorite series? Are you wishing for a little more closure? Join us for a look into the lives of Harry, Ron, Hermione, and their children, as they work through a year of crushes, fitting in, and of course, sexual tension. (This is a SPOOF and should NOT be taken seiously!)

Welcome to the wonderful world of Remus Lupin, Werewolf, Junkie, Scholar, Champion of the Light and Worrier extrordinaire. Mainly RL/SB and RL/SS, but some L/J and PP/OC.

An OOTP parody of the part where Harry meets up with Ron and Hermione. \

No one could have expected the madness that befell Hogwarts when four FBI agents arrived to investigate baby William's potential status as a wizard. Harry & Company spend an action-packed afternoon with Mulder, Scully, Doggett, and Reyes-- chasing Wormtail down, dueling the Malfoys, and discussing the woes of their fanfictional existences. Also, the Agents can't believe who turns up to ruin their day-- in the form of Hogwarts's newest ghost. HP/X-Files crossover.

A very loosely connected companion piece to "A Veritable Font of Underpants," in which we learn whence came the permanent ink pen. This story spans from Christmastime, OotP, through the end of HBP. Beware of abundant silliness, and a bit of romance thrown into the mix for kicks and giggles.

Harry should know better than to litter in the Forbidden Forest.

Bunnies have invaded Hogwarts and they're doing unspeakable things to the landscape, not to mention themselves. Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Snape join forces to stop them, and strange and unspeakable things happen.

A somewhat ridiculous look at the life of the Marauders during their fifth year at Hogwarts.

How I Lost My Pink Bunny Slippers, by Draco Malfoy. Or rather, How My Pink Bunny Slippers Got Stolen (because they don't just lose themselves, you know)

Six-year-old Draco and five-year-old Ginny are taken to a Ministry party by their parents and told not to talk to each other. Naturally they seek each other out immediately...

Snape and Filch discover a common interest or two.... (mild slash)

I revamp some classic rock and disco hits as well as the occasional Disney song for the musical version of Order of the Phoenix!

In response to a challenge on my SevenOfQuills yahoogroup. The L/MWPP gang and their friends find an unusual book in the Restricted Section. Mysterious and humorous adventures soon follow. This is set in the Marauders' 3rd year.

Hyperness Sugar - the newest invention from Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes. You can probably guess what happens next.

A shopping trip in Diagon Alley leads to a startling discovery of somone's secret past.

Just a little thing I worte a few months ago and forgot to post - When Draco persuades Harry to go shopping with him, males and females alike blatantly start hitting on the Gryffindor. Draco gets jealous.

Operation: Take to the Air - ``Thoughtful, amusing, riddled with fun tidbits, simply hilarious, if you're into that sort of thing. Enjoyable! Continuance of Operation Laugh out Loud, which you may want to read first. And the student’s - awestruck - minds took to the air.

In the third sequel to "Professor Eudice Eusyram," Harry is transformed into a girl with big boobs!

Draco Malfoy has a plan. He has discovered the Extralucidity Potion, the ultimate aid to spying. However, when he tries it out he gets more than he bargained for. How is he to concentrate on classes, not to mention Quidditch, when he can see through everyone’s robes?``Hints of slash, plenty of nudity and a whole lot of naughty nonsense!

Severus Snape discovers he's the subject of fanfic, most of it slash...

Harry, Hermione, most of the Weasley clan, and Malfoy take a Muggle Studies-sponsered trip to Disneyland. Putting Ron and Malfoy in a boat together is not a good idea. Fred+George+Peter Pan+Cornish Pixies doesn't make anyone (except the twins) happy either. If it wasn't for the convenient idea of Memory Charms, Disneyland would never be the same.

Harry's fifteen now, and Sirius and Remus decide it's time to tell him about the birds and the bees. It's an uneasy situation for everyone and insanity ensues.

In which Harry and Draco get together. FINALLY. Slash.

Ron and Harry prepare for a mission and must battle terrible fashion sense. Slash, HP/RW.

The gang is "gonna party like it’s 1999". Drinking, snogging, and alcohol are some of the themes involved in this program. As Edwin McCain once so eloquently said, "I couldn’t ask for more.". Post-graduation.

It isn't easy to be brilliant, talented, sexy, and, oh yeah, in love with your sworn enemy. Between protective parents, love spells, mistaken identities, and the Death Eater's Handbook, only Draco could get through it all with his nails intact.

Winky's baaaack! When Draco comes and farts in the Gryffindor common room, Harry, Dean,Ron,Seamus, and Neville are forced to stay in their dorm. Check out what ensues. Guest Appearances by: Hermione(comes back later), Voldemort (he stays), and Dumbledore (he stays too).

Harry knows what he has to do: tell Draco he's pregnant with their child.

Sometimes it just doesn't pay to get out of bed in the morning, and today everybody's favorite Potions Master is having one of those days!

Sirius and Remus overhear two girls talking about what a great kisser Sirius is. This leads to some experimentation and some startling revelations.

After it was over, they agreed it would be best never to mention the ducks ever again.

Last of the LGYL trilogy. Percy Weasley is usually a very calm, patient person. But Fred did something that summer to make him snap. What was it?

Marauder fic. Sirius likes Remus; James likes Lily. What will happen when Sirius proposes a challenge?

A humorous and somewhat twisted interpretaion of the contents inside the book known as Hogwarts: A History.

Sirius Black is in trouble. On a night of sheer inebriation, he kisses (or maybe does something more than that to) somebody. Problem: He can't remember who it was the next morning. Everyone in #12 Grimmauld Place is a culprit, everyone. But how will poor Mr. Black find out, if he's fighting for a seemingly lost kiss.

Harry, Hermione, Ron, Ginny, Molly and Arthur go to Disney World to celebrate Ron’s birthday and Arthur’s new job. See what chaos ensues when the Weasleys have to spend a week as Muggles, Harry gets his first taste of McDonald’s, and Ginny and Ron ride their first rollercoaster!

The long-awaited sequel to "Harry Exposed"! The game is on! Strip poker starts and Ron's nowhere to be found! But Ginny is....

A short, simple sequel to Caught In The Act. This time McGonagall eavesdrops and hears some things she really didn't want to hear.

After four years of quiet life in England, Dr. Weasley returns to America in this brand new tale. What begins as a normal day at the Ministry quickly turns into a tumultuous adventure as Ron and Hermione are both accidentally transported to New York City. There, they find themselves locked in an international conflict, and Ron is once again confronted by an old foe. Will justice be served, or will the entire magical community be jeopardized? Featuring special guest appearances by some of America's wackiest personalities.

Watch two families battle it out, the Malfoys and the Weasleys, in this crazy game show where every question is a burst of mayhem.

Harry is in his 5th year but things get confusing when he starts hearing voices that really annoy him. And plus the title pretty much says it all. It's really funny, there's no plot.

Ginny Weasley is chosen for one out of four students to raid other students' dorms. But what happens when she's given the dorm of her ex, her arch-enemy, and the very boy she's fancied since she was a little girl? Parody on MTV show Room Raiders.

By request, the follow-up to Transvestite Night. Now Ron is in the picture and hearts are getting pummeled, pulverized and otherwise harmed.

Harry Potter's world is about to be turned upside down. He, along with the whole of Hogwarts, is about to enter a parallel universe of terror. No one is safe. Not even you. Cliches, unforgivable parodies, and, of course, paralyzing fear abound. Exercise extreme caution while reading this fic... it may be too scary to handle!

Dumbledore is elected Minister! The Trio is tapped to run a department! Seven books are devised to re-introduce wizards and muggles! The trio try to rein in fan fiction! They write their own guides: Continuity; Cliches; Powers.

A parody of Father of the Bride. At Faith Weasley's graduation, her parents (Ron and Hermione) are shocked to find out that she is engaged! Especially OverprotectiveDad!Ron....

Luna Lovegood is captured by Lucius Malfoy, who has nefarious intentions. He soon learns, however, that some kinds of torture are just too much.

A few crucial evenings in the recent life of (Nymphadora) Tonks--in which Tonks embarrasses herself, Remus is polite, and Sirius is drunk...and that's just the first night. Or at least, that's how she tells it. Just another RL/NT romantic comedy.

Edmonds. Morris. Two FictionAlley authors, one incredibly crazy story. What happens when you take Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone and mix it with two psychotic Harry Potter fans? You get Twisted! A 10 scene movie script that would eventually be put on film and turned in as an Honors English project now comes to you in two chapters--scenes 1-5 and 6-10.

Ron's agreed to read Hermione's favorite Muggle book - "The Princess Bride". But when he falls asleep and realizes that he's living the plot of S. Morgenstern's classic story with a few familiar faces, will the fairy tale be as enchanting as he originally thought? Features EnthralledInABook!Ron, ButtercupButNotATwit!Hermione, and Inigo!Harry.

Darlene’s group fell in love with the Marauders the first time they saw them. Lily’s group had also fallen hard. In a battle of wits, they arrange a competition…the freedom to ask out the Marauder of their choice if they win, with no loopholes and no opposition. It’s a girl-on-girl fight, and the boys are completely oblivious.

Coffee Break..mmm what would you expect from the darling Death Eaters on their coffee break?``hmm...well not this!!``It's a load of nonsense written by an author on a sugar rush, she apologizes in advance to DE's as in the this fic they are nothing but "poofs"...

This is Draco Malfoy's Diary. It's only part, but I've devised a system of stealing entries day by day. So if you want to know what Malfoy's REALLY thinking, then you should check this out. I'd better go, I think he's searching for it now, he just turned over a first-year...

Draco starts a diary in the hopes of writing down and achieving his life goals. But when he has life goals such as--``1. Kill Potter horribly and make it look like an accident.``2. Maim and Murder his sidekicks Little Miss Know-it-all and The Weasel King, just for fun, and the pleasure of seeing them squirm.``--who can guess how it will end.

How long can an author spend without needling Sev? Not much, in my case...

When detention with Snape goes awry for Hermione, Ron takes drastic action. A parody of Lerner & Loewe's musical "My Fair Lady."

Hermione says no one can bring the internet to Hogwarts. Draco disagrees. Includes Hogwarts on livejournal, cool screen names, silliness, and more.

Harry is sent by Dumbledore to be watched by Dracula, King of the Vampires. What's wrong with this picture?

Professor Snape discovers a lack in his geographical knowledge.

This is an interview with the villain from the Harry Potter series that everyone loves to hate: Lord Voldemort. What would happen if a muggle television personality were to interview this famous fiend? Let's find out...

The title explains itself.

A parody of all the things we love to hate about Mary Sues.  Includes trademark sneers and smirks, pregnant pauses, eyebrow raising, platform shoes, dark and stormy nights, secrets, love octagons and, of course, snogging.

So... you've stumbled across Snape's diary... do you dare read it? Open the pages and discover what really goes in inside the mysterious minds of everyone's favourite Potions Master.

The Princess Bride as you've never seen it before. Draco is a penniless Farm Boy! Ginny is the most beautiful woman in the world! Harry searches for the silver-handed man who betrayed his father, Hagrid rhymes, Snape dies, and Voldemort and Wormtail plot to take over the world -- or at the very least, Guilder.

Here's just another little funny fic I wrote. Basically, it involves the author (me!) kidnapping several HP characters and forcing them to act out the Matrix. Sound like fun? No worries, it has several ships, considering Harry's such a flirt. Involves Leatherwearing!Hermione, Hero!Harry, Bad Ass!Lucius, and several other favorites.

Seamus feels left out when Dean spends all his time with Ginny, Neville mourns the loss of a good friend, and someone is heading for Azkaban.

So this is a really unusual day for Draco Malfoy which drives him crazy. What happens? Read to find out!

What would have happened if James hadn't died? Chapter 1 of the Potter Place. Humor, angst (only in the first chapter), and general cuteness. AW! James is being a (good)father!!!

Have you ever wondered what happened when Lockhart asked our dear Potions Professor to be his 'assistant'?

Ginny does a favor for her twin brothers that leads her on a wild ride with her not so favorite enemy, Draco Malfoy.

Fred and George pull a prank on Malfoy... but unfortunately it goes farther than they expected it to!

When Neville makes a mistake on one of his potions, only Snape is unaffected by the results. Can he keep everyone's pants on - literally - until the effects wear off?

How Tom Riddle turned evil, and what muffins, the devil, and squibs had to do with it.

Even wondered what really was written in Tom's Diary before it was given to Ginny? The secrets of young Slytherin Heir and bizarre events from his life await you in this story...

Death Eater Draco searches for the perfect girl to fulfill the Dark Lord's request.

What happens when Hogwarts puts on LotR as its school play? Read this to find out!

Hogwarts students have dealt with all sorts of Mary Sues - the ridiculous, the annoying, and even the violently evil. But now, they have one girl that no previous fic could prepare them for - the terminally insane. Leigh is - well, we'll say "unique." You have to be, to have a pet rock - excuse us, Rok. Who talks. And who told her that she is in fact Sailor LoOn, guardian of peace, justice, and the world's bananas.``But that last part is top secret. Please don't read it. Then she'll have to kill you. Or at least poke you viciously with her Loon stick.

Another -- perhaps the most obvious -- of the end-of-year report series.

Time has passed, but Transfigurations exams are still a bane to ``Snape, Malfoy and the others, but they\\\'ve got a plan.... No sheep were harmed ``in the making of this story. Just chocolate chip cookies.

Because of Hermione Rita had to look for a new job - and she found it! Agony Aunt at "Witch Weekly"...

A D/Hr fic satire, prompted by the use of the same plot line over and *over* again. Not for the weak of heart or the weak of butt.

We all saw You-Know-Who's body lying dead on the ground when we were seventeen, so that means he's been dead for three years, right? Wrong. That's the first problem. Second problem is that Terry doesn't have a girlfriend or a real job. Third is that Zacharias and I will be sharing a room for the next six months. Fourth is that ... you get the idea.

This story is a parody of Dickens' The Christmas Carol with our favorite Potions Master taking the starring role. Severus Snape takes a trip through his subconscious and comes out with a greater appreciation for the one person who truly cares about him.

A twisted tale in which Voldemort (who else?) tries to take over the world by using a concoction of spells to turn him into Barney the dinosaur. If this seems twisted and dumb to you, read the authors note in the first chapter where I try to explain everything. Mainly a fictional (supposedly) account on the Purple One's rise to power in the first chapter, it gradually becomes more and more HP oriented. Totally HP in the third chapter.

Imagine if all the HP characters had to act out every single one of their fics? It would be totally twisted. This is my take on what might happen behind the scenes of a D/G fic.

If you love Remus J. Lupin (and don't we all?), you've probably wondered what the 'J.' stands for. Sirius Black wonders the same thing, and he isn't above using a chocolate frog to find out.

Why is everyone declaring love for Harry? Why is Malfoy off the Slytherin Quidditch team? Why is Ginny making a list? Why is Hermione so upset? And who is that girl with the funny accent? Too many Unexpected Task ideas combine to confuse everyone. Four chapters.

15 years after the trio graduates. Now their kids are taking their places at Hogwarts

Dumbledore enlists the help of a friend from the States to help his former DADA teachers work through their anxieties.

When Sirius is given an ultimatum by his mother, McGonagall enforces cannon and the PG13 rating is kept absolute, there’s only one thing left to do... Warning: Keep your tongue firmly in your cheek. Contains: slash, het, femmeslash, incest, outcest (bear with me), humor, cliché, disturbing use of drapery, utter demolition of the 4th wall, melodramatics, threesomes, some language, & near-musical encounters.

Updated to comply with Half Blood Prince. “'You do not seek to kill me, Dumbledore.' 'We both know that there are other ways of destroying a man, Tom,' Dumbledore said calmly." What are those ways, and what does candy have to do with anything?

A very \

It's bottles, powder, diapers and pacifiers for Ron and his friends when a prank's result turns... Infant? 0.o. With their arch rival the sly and evil Draco Malfoy reduced to a mere toddler, their punishment is to 'baby sit' the blond haired Slytherin, until such time as a cure can be formulated. What's a Gryffindor to do?

What happened after Harry and Hermione left the Great Hall and what Draco had to say about it. A sequel to Humiliation.

As the Ministry celebrates the final victory over the Dark Lord, Lucius Malfoy receives a very unusual offer.