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When Sirius is given an ultimatum by his mother, McGonagall enforces cannon and the PG13 rating is kept absolute, there’s only one thing left to do... Warning: Keep your tongue firmly in your cheek. Contains: slash, het, femmeslash, incest, outcest (bear with me), humor, cliché, disturbing use of drapery, utter demolition of the 4th wall, melodramatics, threesomes, some language, & near-musical encounters.

Words: 1,193
Chapters: 1
Hits: 1,669

What happens when Sirius Black falls for a girl who makes all his charms and tricks worth nothing? And what happens when that same girl causes turmoil in the close friendship between Sirius and James?

Words: 9,598
Chapters: 3
Hits: 559