The Smuggest Thing Ever

~Chapter 3~

Narrator- In the last Chapter, people start singing Disco Hippie, (by Play), and the author finds out she can make people disappear.

Author- Great, just great. You messed up my story line again!!! *makes Hermione disappear in a flash of a snowstorm.*

Ron- HERMIONE!!!!!!!!!! COME BACK!!!

Narrator- Disembodied voice says, How rude!! I command you to bring me back this instant!!!

Author- No.

Narrator- Disembodied voice says, Ron, swish and flick and say Arbadacarba!

Ron- *swishes and flicks* Arbadacarba!

Narrator- Hermione reappears in a flash of sunstorm.

Ginny- What's a sunstorm?

Narrator- Everyone turns and looks at Hermione.

Hermione- How am I supposed to know?

Luna- Tick tock, well we all go crazy

Harry- When the clock locks

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pigwidgeon- Hi.

Barney- I love you, you love me, we're a happy fam-

Great Hall (except Harry)- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!

Harry- *taps his foot to the music* With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you, won't you say you love me too?

Everyone (except Harry, Barney, and Cho)- NO WAY!

Hermione- Especially me you stupid ugly mean beasts that ship me and Harry!!! You are SO wrong!!!

Cho- I love you, Harry!!!!!!!!!!

*Harry and Cho kiss and everyone turns away and makes sickening noises *

Ron- *Looks at Hermione*

Hermione- Don't even think about it.

Ginny- When Plays our show

Hermione- Hip hop (Hip hop), glow sticks

Cho- Sour apple blow pops make me out of control

Pigwidgeon- I like sticks.

Harry- "Oh, my god, I do too!" *laughs freakishly*

Little ugly girl from Build a Bear commercial- You're doing it all wroong! It's supposed to be like this. *clears her throat* Ooh sha la la ooh ooh sha la la la la

Narrator- Hey little ugly girl from Build a Bear workshop commercial, that was completely disgusting.

Simon- Go narrator!

Fred- Go poop on a log.

Simon- And why?

Fred- I just wanted to see what you would do.

Narrator- Suddenly, the author dies.

Author- No I didn't! What you talkin bout Willis?

Narrator- I am not Willis!

Author- You don't have a name! I shall name you Bob.

Narrator- NO!! BOB IS UGLY LIKE LINDA!!!

Author- "Ok, you can be Linda."

Narrator- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Linda ran away.

Everyone in the Great Hall (except Ron)- YIPPEEE!!!!!!!!!

Ron- Farewell, Linda of the night!

Hermione- Ok? I'll just pretend I know what he's talking about.

Narrator- Ron leaves, and NARRATOR comes back.

Ron- I went to the bathroom- at night.

Rachel- That's almost a line from Spongebob!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! *hugs Ron tightly- VERY TIGHTLY*

Ron- How can it be almost a line? *gasps for air*

Everyone- Who's Rachel?

Author- My best friend.

Rachel- Spongebob's #1 fan.

Everyone- Oh.

Author- jkfhdkjgfdgfjkhdklsklsdurhgbjfdvduyhnnnndkslhgk

Harry- Sure!

Narrator- What?

Author- I speak chinese.

Hermione- My life is so wild like a child in a candy store

Ron- It sure is.

Hermione- It's a scene so strange like a game or a boy

All boys except Harry- Hey!

Harry- *sniffles* "Thank you!!!! *cries happily*

Lily- You really got me goin

Harry- You got me so I don't know what I'm doin

Emu- *sticks his head into a sandbox* Disco Hippie got his head in the sand

Hermione- Disco Hippie got a world in his hand

Everyone- *looks at Disco Hippie who suddenly appears* Actually, all he has in his hand is a candy wrapper.

Pigwidgeon- CANDY!!!!!!!!!!

Disco Hippie- I don't have anymore, little girl.

Pigwidgeon- I'm a girl!! Yea!!!

Katie Bell- I know who you like, I know who you like!

Hermione- Who were you talking to?

Katie Bell- I don't know, that's just my theme song.

Ginny- You are a stupid jerk, Miss Bell.

Harry and Ron- *guffaw guffaw*

Hermione- *flashes annoyed look at the boys* You know that guffaw means,