The Real Story of Harry Potter

Chapter 17: The Lovers (well, all right, Snoggers) are Discovered!

Mrs. Weasley was in hysterics. "What can he have been thinking!" she cried. "He knows he's not supposed to leave the house...what if he's gone out to try and defeat Voldemort by himself? You all know how ambitious he is...oh, we never had this problem with Bill or Charlie..." She collapsed on the couch, a mess of tears.

Mr. Weasley turned to the (sorry, Ron) children. "I think all the adults need to have a discussion," he said. They retreated silently.

"I'm not quite sure what we should do," he said. "If we leave, we're in danger. If we stay, we might be in danger. I'm thinking we should opt for possible danger over danger and stay here."

I nodded. So did Sirius and Remus. The three of us went upstairs.

Harry, Ginny, Fred, and George were sitting in Ginny's room. "Never thought he'd be this thick," said George.

"Never thought he'd break a rule, either," said Fred.

"We can't think about it too much," said Ginny in a high voice. "We've got to just do normal things, or we'll all go mad."

"She's right," said Sirius. "I saw it all the time in Azkaban. Dwell on the bad things, and you're finished."

Fred and George stood up. "Guess we'll go cause havoc and turmoil, then" Fred said.

"Wait a minute," Harry said when they had left, "where's Ron and Hermione?"

"Don't tell me they've left too!" cried Ginny.

"Let's look at the clock," I said.

The five of us raced downstairs and into the kitchen. The second we arrived, Sirius began to laugh. "What?" asked Remus.

Sirius pointed at the clock. The "Ron" and "Hermione" hands were pointed to, "Snogging Furiously On Ron's Bed".

Harry snorted. "I knew those two fancied each other!" he said.

"Oh, that's bright of you," said Ginny sarcastically.

"Do you suppose we ought to go and interrupt things before the hands change to 'Doing Things That Are None of Your Business'?" I asked.

"Yes, but subtly," said Remus. "Follow my lead." He climbed the stairs and we followed him. "I say, does anyone know where Hermione and Ron have gone to?" he said in a loud voice.

"Oh, that's subtle," muttered Sirius. Remus elbowed him.

"Perhaps they're having a serious and academic conversation," said Harry. Ginny went into convulsions.

The door to Ron's room burst open. "All right, very funny," said Ron, his face as red as his hair. Ginny and Harry collapsed in the stairwell, laughing uncontrollably.

"Don't worry, Ron, I sympathize," said Sirius.

"Hermione, it's safe, you can come out," called Remus. Hermione appeared a second later, her hair even more disheveled than usual. This, of course, made Harry and Ginny laugh even harder.

~~*~~

At Ginny's insistence, we decided to distract ourselves from the situation with Percy, and at Hermione and Remus's insistence, we all ended up watching "Moulin Rouge" on the DVD player that Mr. Weasley had bought, Fred and George included. Their presence made the movie particularly interesting.

"I don't recall Zidler having purple hair," said Sirius suspiciously.

"Well, he does now," said George.

"EVERYBODY SHUT UP!!!!" Remus and Hermione screamed. "Ewan is singing."

Ginny was braiding Hermione's hair into cornrows, something she had learned from Lee Jordon. The end of each braid had gold and red Gryffindor beads.

I screeched.

"What!" shouted Ron, alarmed.

"Look at my nails! They're chipped!"

Sirius, Remus, Harry, Ron, Fred, and George let out a collective male groan.

Ginny pointed her wand at my nails. "Vernis Obliviate!" The old polish vanished.

"Thanks!" I said, a bit surprised.

"I've got some more polish in that box over there," Ginny said, pointing.

I selected a silvery shade called Pensieve. The second after it touched my nails, it dried. I looked back at the screen, where the Narcoleptic Argentinian was tangoing with an alligator in a ballet tutu. My eyes shot over to Fred and George.

Mr. Weasley stuck his head in the door. "Jo, your compuatater is making funny noises."

"I'll be right back," I said.

I had e-mail, I discovered.

Jo:

I should have known something like this was going to happen. Between the stress of pregnancy and the book, it's not your fault you're going a bit mental. Just tell me where you are and I'll come get you.

Lisa.

I angrily typed back.

Lisa:

I AM NOT MENTAL! I know it sounds that way, but I am really at The Burrow and Voldemort is really after me. If you've told Neil and Jessica that I've gone mad, I'll sic Remus on you some night when the moon is full.

Jo.

"That is, if I agree to be sicced," said Remus. "That reminds me...Sirius, I haven't taken the potion yet, could you make some for me?"

"The potion?" I asked.

"Dachsbane," Remus said. "We can brew it back where the others are, because I know Sirius would be so disappointed if he missed anymore of Ewan." He grinned. Sirius gave him the SBBQOYSOTCL.

We collected the ingredients and a cauldron, then went back upstairs to boil the potion with one of Hermione's jar flames.

Remus gulped it down. "God, I hate this stuff," he said.

"Well, it's better than turning into a mad weiner dog," Ron said. Sirius and Remus glared at him. "What? What did I say?" he protested.

"The term is dachshund," said Sirius coldly.

"Do you know," Remus said, "how embarrassing it is to be a gay man who turns into a WEINER DOG?!"

"Good thing it's not a hamster," Sirius said.

"SIRIUS!"

"Well, it could be worse."

At that moment, the Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Rowena Ravenclaw, Witch, hopped across the room and landed at my feet. I picked it up, and the pages fluttered to page 8.

I read aloud. "R is above S in the alphabet, and that is how it shall always be."

"Look, Rowena," said Harry, "I don't mean to be disrespectful or anything, but for once could you give us a prophecy that isn't so bloody cryptic?"

The book flipped to page 322 and jumped into Harry's hand. He read, "Sorry, but no, I couldn't. You try writing coherent prophecies when you're in a trance, Salazar is sneaking snakes into the castle, Helga is trying frantically to teach, and Godric is sticking to his boyfriend like a magnet." It slammed shut again.

"R is above S...maybe it means we're never supposed to have sex with you on top," Remus said to Sirius.

"Um, that was a little too much information," said Hermione. Ginny was finishing the last cornrow.

The book flew into Remus's hands and flipped open. He read, "Sorry, but no. I really couldn't care less if you or Sirius is on top. No offense, dear, but I had better things to do than predict your sex life, thank you very much."

"Well, I should HOPE so," said Remus to the book as it shut.

Chapter Eighteen: Rita Skeeter

That night, we were all sitting together in the living room, sucking on lemon drops. Fred and George were working on a catalogue that they were making for all their tricks. Ron and Hermione were playing wizard chess. Harry was reading Quidditch Through The Ages, and Ginny was knitting. (Already, I noticed, her stitches were more even than her mother's.) Sirius and Remus were sitting at the desk in the corner, each consulting the book of prophecies and taking notes. Mr. Weasley was reading The Daily Prophet, and Mrs. Weasley was reading Witch Weekly.

I yawned. "Well, I think I'm going to bed," I said. "Can I use the shower first?"

"Certainly, dear," said Mrs. Weasley.

I started to leave the room, but a loud cough stopped me. "Aren't you forgetting something?" Sirius said.

I groaned. "Don't tell me you two have to be in the shower with me!"

"Probably not in it," said Remus, "but I think we'll have to stand outside."

"Outside the bathroom or outside the shower?"

"Outside the shower."

Rolling my eyes, I left the room. They followed me upstairs, to where I got some of the clothes Mrs. Weasley had loaned me. She had given me the most recent of her maternity robes, last used when Ginny was in utero. Although they were a tad shabby, they were a nice aqua color.

"Just don't look," I said to Remus and Sirius as we walked into the bathroom.

"Like we'd want to," said Sirius.

"Good point."

The water was warm and soothing. I let it run down my skin, washing away all the stress and anxiety. Finally, though, I had to turn the water off.

"Hand me a towel," I said. Sirius's hand reached through the shower curtain with a white towel. "Thanks." I dried off.

"Now, could one of you hand me my clothes?"

"They're going to get quite damp in there," said Remus. "Just come out, we'll face the other way."

Hesitantly, I stepped out of the shower. True to Remus's word, he and Sirius had their backs to me.

Just as I finished dressing, I heard a sharp knock at the front door. Remus turned to me, a scared look on his face. "I just hope that's Moody," he said.

Cautiously, we went into the living room. Mr. Weasley was looking through the peephole. "It's Rita Skeeter," he said.

"God, don't let her in," said Harry.

"Annoying meddling idiot," said Ron.

"Ask her what she wants," said Hermione.

Before Mr. Weasley could ask, Rita Skeeter answered the question on her own. "You've got to let me in!" she cried. "I've got a letter from Moody...it's terribly urgent...if you value your lives, let me in!"

I couldn't tell if she was being serious or dramatic, but apparently Mr. Weasley didn't want to risk it. He opened the door and let her in.

Rita was holding a letter in her lime-color-nailed hands. She was terribly out of breath. "This...it's from Moody...says that he knows I'm not a Death Eater...(gasp)...you've got to leave...leave now...Voldemort knows you're here..."

Mrs. Weasley jumped out. "Knows we're here? How could he have known that?" But the door opened for a second time, and her question was answered.

~~*~~

"P-P-P-Percy!" Hermione gasped.

Standing in the doorway was Percy, with Lucius Malfoy and Walden Macnair by his side.

"I DON'T BELIEVE IT!" Ginny screamed.

"Ginny...it's for the best...the Dark Lord doesn't want to hurt you or anyone else here...all he wants is to tell the truth..."

"The TRUTH!" yelled Ron. "The truth is that he's a murdering, evil -"

"The Dark Lord has only murdered those who were too blind to see the truth," said Percy.

"SHUT UP!" Harry screamed. "DON'T YOU DARE SAY ANOTHER WORD!"

Percy nodded to Macnair. The Death Eater raised his wand, and suddenly all of us were handcuffed, Rita Skeeter included.

"Everyone listen to me," said Percy, over Mrs. Weasley's sobs. "No one will get hurt. No one will die. All Voldemort wants is to defend himself from the Ravenclaw heir..."

"What has Ravenclaw got to do with anything!" I demanded.

"Everything," said Malfoy. "A new heir to the line of Ravenclaw is being formed as we speak. A new heir that prophecy has foretold to be greater than even Rowena Ravenclaw herself." He looked hard at me.

"No," I said, a sinking feeling in my stomach.

"Yes," said Macnair.

"But I'm a Muggle," I said. "My daughter Jessica is a Muggle. My whole family's Muggles. How could this baby be a wizard or witch, much less the heir of Ravenclaw?"

"All will be explained," said Percy.

And suddenly, the words of the book of prophecies came back to me. "Four shall come together, in a fraternity of the night. One is brilliant of mind; one is noble of heart; one is kind of nature, and one shall seek to end their happiness. The weakling shall turn traitor and the fraternity shall be dispersed. One shall leave this world for the next; one shall spend a dozen years of misery; one shall live a life of grief; and the traitor shall pay for his deeds."

"It's not the Marauders," I said.

"What isn't?" said Hermione, bewildered.

"The prophecy. The one about four coming together in a fraternity of the night. It's about us, about the night we were up at night and looking over the book. Hermione, you're the one who's brilliant of mind; noble of heart, that's you, Harry; I guess kind of nature is me. And Percy is the one who seeks to end our happiness. He's turned traitor, just like the book said."

As Macnair magicked us out the door, I couldn't help but remember the last words of the prophecy. So Percy would pay for his deeds...but was one of us destined to die?