Letters

Harry couldn't sleep. He kept hearing the screams of terror from the wedding a few days before. Plus, he was staying at Twelve Grimmauld Place. Never a good place to get a decent night's sleep. After tossing and turning for what seemed like hours, he crept to the drawing room. He pointed his wand at the empty fireplace and muttered, 'Incendio.' A fire sprang up in the grate, crackling loudly in the silent house.

He crossed the carpet to the ornate desk and searched until he found a few sheets of parchment, a jar of ink, and a somewhat battered - but still usable - quill. He settled in front of the fire, lying on his stomach.

-Dear Ginny,

I don't know what to say. I don't even know why I'm doing this. It's not as if I can send it to you.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry I had to break up with you. I didn't want to. I had to. You're in enough danger now, without being my girlfriend. I know you say you understand, but I hope you really do.

I'm sorry I can't even send this to you.

I'm sorry I put your and your family in this horribly unfair position.

I'm sorry I couldn't dance with you at the wedding. I wanted to. So much.

God, Ginny, I want to wake up, and find that all this has been a dream, and my parents are still alive, and there was no Voldemort.

I want to wake up next to you. I can smell your hair in the Amortentia potion. I want to wake up surrounded by the scent of your hair. I want to fall asleep surrounded by the scent of your hair.

I want to marry you someday.

Someday.

When this is over, Ginny, I swear, we will have a someday.

I love you, Ginny. Did I ever tell you that? I don't remember if I did... I love you. You're so strong and brave. I wish I had realized it sooner. When this is over, you can spend as much time telling me what I prat I am for not realizing it sooner.

Please be safe, Gin... If I succeed at this... and you're not alive to share it with me... Please be careful.

Love,

Harry

Harry folded the letter, and wrote Ginny's name across the front. He stared at it until his eyes burned and watered. 'Damn it,' he whispered. He felt helpless. He wanted to send it to Ginny, but he couldn't draw attention to Grimmauld Place or Ginny. Not even when she started school. He couldn't even risk leaving the letter here.

Sighing, Harry pulled out his wand. Tears burned at the corners of his eyes. He exhaled strongly, and pinched the bridge of his nose to try to stem them. One escaped, slid down his face, and landed with a soft plop on the letter, just under Ginny's name.

He touched the front of the letter with the tip, and whispered, 'Incendio.' The letter went up in flames, the same color as Ginny's hair.

He fell asleep with his hand resting in the cold ashes.

****

Ginny sat huddled on the hearth of the Gryffindor common room. She ached all over. Even her hair hurt. She bit her lip, hard. She was not going to cry. She was damned if she let the Carrows know in any way, shape, or form they had gotten to her.

She wanted to cry. She wanted to burrow into Harry and cry until his shirt front was soaked.

He knew what it was like to be on the receiving end of the Cruciatus curse. He wouldn't think she was weak for crying.

She tore the blank end of parchment from her Potions essay.

Dear Harry,

I wish you were here, and I'm glad you aren't.

Jack Sloper has a small wireless. We listen to it sometimes at night. Neville or I usually put a Muffliato on the portrait hole. There's been nothing about you. So, no news is good news, I guess.

I wish I had something like your Map. Just to see if you're safe. I hope you are.

You have to be.

For all of us.

Do me a favor, okay? Try not to do anything stupid. You have Hermione with you, so she should keep you from making any colossal mistakes.

I'm sorry if my handwriting is shite. I had detention with Alecto Carrow tonight. She let Crabbe practice his Cruciatus curse on me. Repeatedly. Fortunately for me, he's so thick, he can barely say the word. I'm still a little shaky from it, though.

I wish I could send this to you.

But it's a good thing I can't. You don't want to know what things are like at Hogwarts with Snape in charge.

Please come out of this alive. I'd have to kill you if you died, you know.

I know you know... how I feel about you. I do love you. Beyond an eleven year-old girl's crush.

I dream about the night we fell asleep on a sofa in the common room. It felt... right.

All my love,

Ginny

Ginny clumsily folded the letter with her trembling hands. She heard a creak, and froze in fear. If it was the wrong person, being caught with a letter to Harry would be the least of her worries. 'Ginny? What are you doing up?' Neville asked.

'Had to finish my Potions essay,' she whispered.

'What's that in your hand?'

'Nothing.'

'Liar.' Neville tugged the square of parchment from Ginny's fingers. He opened it and skimmed the words. 'Oh.'

'I need to burn it. Can't leave it lying around. Can't hide it in my things.' Ginny's voice grew husky with unshed tears.

'I'll do it,' said Neville calmly. He pulled his wand out, and almost gently, tapped the letter, while he softly said, 'Incendio.'

The parchment burned to ashes. Ginny shook with the sobs that she had tried to hold back since the night of Bill and Fleur's wedding. Neville put an arm around her shoulder and let her cry into the sleeve of his jumper.

*****

Dear Ginny,

Does it sound like I'm stalking you if I sit with the Map and watch you sleep in your dormitory? It does to me. When it's my turn to stand watch, I'll sneak out the map and find you. Just to see if you're all right.

Why were you in the dungeon the other night? Did you have detention with Snape? Or worse, the Carrows? I hope not. If they hurt you... An Unforgivable might be worth it.

Ron left. I can't find him on the Map. He's not at school. The Map doesn't lie.

He's right. I don't know what the hell I'm doing. Sometimes, I hate Dumbledore for sending me off on this bloody quest without any information at all.

And I can't hate him. He knew if I knew everything, I'd rush headlong into something without being prepared to handle it. Bad habit of mine. I'd say 'get used to it,' but I'm not sure I'll ever be able to tell you that. I hope so.

I'm wearing the jumper I got for Christmas my first year. It's a little ragged around the edges, and I had to put an Engorgement charm in it since I have grown a bit since my first year. Your mum once told me you picked out the yarn. Wearing it makes me feel like you're here.

I would never say all this mushy stuff in person... I'm glad you won't be able to read this.

Love,

Harry

Harry burned the letter, and scattered the ashes outside the tent. He stood in the cold, still night, looking at the sky. With a start, he realized it would be Christmas soon.

*****

Ginny paced the upper gallery of Aunt Muriel's house. She was waiting for everyone else to go to bed, so she could try to find the Potterwatch broadcast on the wireless.

'Ginevra, stop that stomping about!' yelled Aunt Muriel from her sitting room.

Ginny mouthed, 'Don't call me Ginevra, you cow.' She hated it when Aunt Muriel called her Ginevra. She flopped down on a window-seat. A scrap of parchment and a quill lay there.

Dear Harry,

My parents didn't let me go back to school after the Easter holidays. I can't say I blame them.

I can blame them for staying with Aunt Muriel. She makes Rita Skeeter look like a pleasant person. You remember her from the wedding, don't you?

Tonks had a baby. Did you know that? It's a boy. He's a Metamorphmagus, like his mum. Remus brought a few pictures to show Mum and Dad. There's one with Remus holding Teddy (that's his name) and Teddy looks just like Remus. He's a beautiful baby. Remus says when Teddy's sleeping, he looks like his 'normal' self. There's a picture of that, too. Teddy has Tonks' face - the shape of it - but has Remus' hair and facial features. I wonder whose eyes he has.

If people didn't have a reason to fight before, they should.

That baby, sleeping so peacefully, deserves to have a better world.

I hope you're safe. I hope this ends soon.

If you die, not only will I kill you, but I swear on Merlin's best wizard hat, I will haunt you for eternity. Like Moaning Myrtle. But without all the wailing.

Love,

Ginny

George watched from a bedroom doorway as Ginny folded the parchment, and muttered the Incendio charm. She had been doing that a lot lately. George thought that for a moment, Ginny was going to burst into tears. But she remained resolutely still on the window-seat. Not for the first time, George admired his baby sister's iron will. He wondered if he would have that kind of self-control if he ever needed it.