I’m Not a Muggle Not Yet a Wizard

I’m Not a Muggle Not Yet a Wizard

By Mariposa

Chapter 9

Hermione, Ginny, Gillian, Katie, Angelina, and Alicia were in the seventh year girl’s dorm getting ready for the Yule Ball and gossiping about who was going with whom.

"Kjirsten is going with Neville," said Gillian as she zipped up Ginny’s dress. "And Jane Roberts is going with Dean Thomas."

"Seamus is taking Lavender," Hermione said. "Of course that’s not surprising since they’re dating. And Parvati is going with a Ravenclaw guy her sister set her up with."

Angelina suddenly broke out laughing.

"What’s so funny?" asked Alicia who had been curling her hair with her wand.

"Do you guys realize that this is Mervin Crunk’s fantasy? To be in the same room with six witches in their undergarments?"

"EWWW!" shrieked the other girls.

"He wouldn’t be able to fit through the door anyway," Katie snickered. "I hear the entrance to the fifth year Slytherin boys dorm had to be widened so he could fit through." The others snorted.

Once they were all dressed and had done their hair and put on their make-up and jewelry, they oohed and awed over each other. On they way down to the Common Room, they ran into Colin Creevy. "Looking good ladies," he said. "J-Lo and Cammi Di ain’t got nothing on you."

Gillian smiled. "Thanks, Colin."

Fred, George and Lee were waiting in the Common Room for their dates. Fred let out a fox whistle when he saw Angelina and she grinned and blushed. Fred linked his arm through hers and George and Lee did the same with Katie and Alicia.

"Ron and Harry will be down shortly," George told Hermione and his sister.

The three couples and Gillian headed down to the Great Hall. A few minutes later Ron and Harry came down looking snazzy in their suits. Their mouths dropped open and their eyes bugged out when they saw their dates. Immediately, Ron’s eyes wandered down to the sparkling rhinestone brooch pinned between Hermione’s bosoms. His jaw dropped open at how much her dress was revealing. His face turned red right away.

"You look beautiful, Hermione," he finally managed to say.

Hermione smiled back. "You don’t look too shabby yourself, Ron Weasley."

Meanwhile, Harry was still gawking at Ginny and all thoughts of her being Ron’s younger sister left his mind. Her black dress fit her perfectly and the color contrasted wonderfully with her red hair which was coiled up in a twist.

"You look very lovely, Ginny," he said.

She beamed. "Thank you."

He took her hand and Ron took Hermione’s and they headed down to the Great Hall. When they opened the door to the Great Hall, they gasped at what they saw. The huge room had been transferred into a winter wonderland. Snow was falling lightly from the rafters and Dumbledore had charmed it so it didn’t have a temperature. Ice castles, snowmen, and large snowballs and snowflakes made up the scenery. The snowmen were even blinking and waving at them. Even a large gingerbread house stood in one corner.

Celebrate good times, come on!

Celebrate good times, come on!

There’s a party going on right here

A celebration that lasts throughout the years

So bring your good times and your laughter too

We’re gonna celebrate your party with you

Cel-e-bra-tion

We gonna celebrate and have a good time.

It’s time to come together

It’s up to you, what’s your pleasure?

Everybody around the world come on!

* * * * *

"Draco, are you ready yet? The dance has already started," said Crabbe.

He and Goyle were standing behind their friend who was looking at the mirror, pulling a gold comb through his silver blond hair.

He sighed heavily. "Why did it have to be me?"

"What?" asked Goyle.

"Why did I have to be cursed with such good looks? It’s just unbelievably ridiculous how really, really, really, really, really good-looking I am. You two don’t know how easy you have it."

Goyle and Crabbe looked at each other, not sure whether Draco was complimenting them or not. After Draco made sure his custom-made Gucci suit was smoothed down and he looked perfect to a T, they headed down to the Yule Ball. Draco walked over to Gillian and approved of her dark purple silk slip dress.

"So I hear your father works on Wall Street," he said.

Gillian rolled her eyes. Leave it to Malfoy to bring the conversation to money.

More people came streaming in through the doors. Dean and Jane came in hand in hand, Jane wearing a satin dress in a dark peach color. Britney came in wearing her black tattered dress from her Stronger video, with Mervin behind her. He was four times wider than her and dressed in a powder-blue polyester suit with ruffles. Even Oliver and Charlie came with their gorgeous girlfriends, Mandy and Sara. Mandy was wearing a gold lamee slinky dress, her red hair flowing down her shoulders like a waterfall. Sara had on a floral print silk dress, her shiny black hair also flowing down her back. Everyone was dancing with their dates and was having a wonderful time. Gillian even got to dance with Oliver and thought she had died and gone to heaven. Draco wasn’t too happy when she went back to him and accidentally called him Oliver.

"Great party, eh?" Fred said to Ginny and Harry who had come over to the refreshment table. He threw a peanut butter cluster into his mouth.

Harry nodded. "Oh, yes, a blast." He grinned at Ginny who grinned back.

Angelina smiled at them. "You two make a really cute couple."

"Oh, they’re not a couple, Angie," said Fred. "They just came as friends."

Ginny rolled her eyes. Obviously the idea of her having a boyfriend was nonexistent to her brothers.

* * * * *

Ron came up to Hermione who was at the refreshment table and put his arms around her waist. "Meet me in the Astronomy Tower in fifteen minutes," he whispered in her ear.

"Ron!" she said, immediately embarrassed. It was no secret the Astronomy Tower was a make out place for the students of Hogwarts.

Ron winked at her and walked away. After a few minutes Hermione slunk out the doors and walked to the Astronomy Tower where she waited for Ron. She had been waiting for a few minutes when she heard him say her name.

"Ron?" she said looking towards the entrance, but nobody was there.

"Behind you, Hermione."

Hermione whirled around and gasped at what she saw. Ron was outside the window floating on something. She walked over, put her hands on the windowsill and saw that Ron was sitting on a floating Oriental rug.

He grinned. "It’s a magic carpet. Hope on!"

Hermione stepped up onto the window ledge and Ron took her hand and helped her onto the rug. "Oh, Ron, this is so romantic!" she exclaimed as Ron wrapped a cherry red cloak around her.

They were high above the grounds of Hogwarts., the magic carpet taking them over the lake and hills.

"I can show you the world," Ron sang. "Shining, shimmery, splendid. Tell me princess, now when did you last let your heart decide?" He put his arms around Hermione and held her close. "I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder. Over side ways and under on a magic carpet ride. A whole new world, a new fantastic point of view. No one to tell us no or where to go or say we’re only dreaming."

"A whole new world," Hermione started to sing. "A dazzling place I never knew. But now from way up here, it’s crystal clear that now I’m in a whole new world with you." She gazed down at the trees and fields below them. "Unbelievable sights, indescribable feelings! Soaring, tumbling, free wheeling through an endless diamond sky. A whole new world!"

"Don’t you dare close your eyes," sang Ron.

"A hundred thousand things to see," sang Hermione.

"Hold your breath, it gets better," sang Ron.

They sang together now in unison: "I’m like a shooting star, I’ve come so far. I can’t go back to where I used to be. A whole new world with new horizons to pursue. I’ll chase them anywhere, there’s time to spare. Let me share this whole new world with you."

"A whole new world."

"A whole new world."

"That’s where we’ll be."

"Where we will be."

"A thrilling chase."

"A wondrous place for you and me."

*

Meanwhile, back at the Yule Ball, Mervin was getting down and funky.

Ah, push it

Ah, push it

Ooh baby, baby

Baby, baby

Ooh, baby, baby

Baby baby

Mervin was shaking his fat booty to the song. His belly was jiggling like a supersized bowl full of jelly. He swerved his hips to the tune of the song while singing the lyrics.

Get up on this!

Ah push it!

Ah push it!

Ah push it!

Get up on this!

Ah push it!

Get up on this!

OW! Baby!

Mervin was now break dancing on the floor with the other students around him chanting, "Go Mervin! Go Mervin! Go Mervin! Go! Go! Go!"

Mervin got back up, buckets of sweat pouring down his face. Oh, how he wished Hermione were here to see how cool he was! He began to moonwalk across the floor. He grabbed his crotch and yelped, "OW!"

Now wait a minute, y’all

This dance ain’t for everybody

Only the sexy people

So all you fly mothers, get on out there and dance

Dance, I said!

The chantings of "Go Mervins!" became louder and he jumped up on a table, soon followed by Professor Pervin Crunk who was dressed in the same kind of polyester ruffled suit his son was wearing, only his was pink. (Like father, like son!) They were both getting down and jiggy on the table, shaking their booties and moving their hips. The table had an unbreakable charm on it, or else it would have collapsed being under 900 pounds of Crunks.

Salt and Peppa’s here, and we’re in effect

Want to push it, babe

Coolin’ by day then at night working up a sweat

C’mon girls, let’s go show the guys that we know

How to become number one in a hot party show

Now push it

Ah, push it - push it good

Ah, push it - push it real good

Ah, push it - push it good

Everyone cheered when the song ended. Draco rolled his eyes. Why did his roommates have to be such idiots? A slow song came on and the couples went back to dancing.

* * * * *

Ginny was very happy. She had her arms around Harry’s neck and her chin resting on his shoulders and he had his arms around her waist. She felt like she could stay in this position forever.

The song ended and Harry and Ginny walked over to the refreshment table where Harry poured two cups of punch. Ginny gulped down her drink quickly.

"Whoo, it’s warm in here," she said fanning herself.

"Want to go out in the hall?" Harry suggested. "I think it’s cooler out there."

Ginny nodded and they walked out in the hall and sat on a bench right outside the Great Hall double doors.

"Hmm, I wonder where my brother and Hermione are? I haven’t seen them in awhile."

"Maybe they’re off somewhere having fun." Harry grinned.

Ginny laughed. "I hope McGonagall doesn’t catch them having fun."

Harry laughed too, then turned to Ginny smiling at her. "I’m really having lots of fun tonight."

"Me too," said Ginny. "I’m glad you asked me to the Yule Ball."

"Me too." Ginny was now starting to blush at the way Harry was looking at her. He leaned in closer and whispered in her ear, "You really are beautiful, you know that?"

Ginny’s heart started to pound faster and she wondered if Harry was drunk. But then she hadn’t seen him drink any alcoholic beverages that night, unless somebody had spiked the punch, which couldn’t have been, because she felt fine and she drank the punch. Harry cupped his hand under Ginny’s chin and she closed her eyes as he brought her closer to him. She could feel his lips press against hers as he took her in a deep kiss and could feel his hands on her hair, untwisting her coil and running his hands through her hair.

She sighed contentedly as she was engulfed by his kiss. "Wow," she said once Harry pulled away from her.

"Yeah, wow," Harry said as he ran his hand through his hair. "That was amazing. So amazing, I think I’d like to do it again."

* * * * *

The next Monday in their Intimate Relations class Professor Crunk came in and started handing out small plastic packages to the students.

"What are these?" asked Seamus.

"Condoms," Professor Crunk announced. "The school has required I give them to all my students. You never know when you’re gonna get laid."

"Huh, huh, look this looks like a balloon," Crabbe said stupidly as he blew air in the condom.

"I’m even passing these out to you witches in case you find some stud wizard you want to get it on with," said Crunk.

"Hey, dad, these tastes like chocolate!" said Mervin who was sucking on his condom.

Professor Crunk chuckled. "That’s right. They come in a variety of flavors including chocolate, cherry, butterscotch, and caramel. I find they really spice up the sex life."

"Hey, look, I can fit this over my head!" Mervin said. He had stretched the condom over his head and everyone burst out laughing.

"I’m surprised you can even fit that over your fat head," Hermione said sarcastically.

"All right class," Monsieur Chapeau said. "Professor Crunk is going to how you how to put on a condom."

"Thank you, Monsieur Chapeau," Crunk said as he held up a banana. "See this banana? I’m going to demonstrate putting a condom on it."

Crabbe looked dumbfounded. "You mean you put these things on bananas?"

Draco rolled his eyes. "No, you moron. You put them on your, you know."

But Crabbe shook his head, still confused. "Oh, for Merlin’s sake." Draco leaned over and whispered in his ear. Crabbe immediately started giggling.

"Now watch me closely," Professor Crunk said as he demonstrated putting a condom on the banana. After he was done, the students all tried it after him. "Very good!" he said, beaming proudly. "You’ll be sexperts in no time!"

* * * * *

The next week was the beginning of the Christmas holiday. Harry would have the run of the Gryffindor Tower along with the Weasleys, and oh yes, Britney Spears. Hermione wanted to stay with them, but her parents were taking on her a holiday trip to Spain. She and Ron had been spending all of their time together until the second she had to leave. The evening before the holiday break began, Harry, Ron, and Hermione exchanged Christmas gifts.

Harry gave Ron a huge book on Quidditch and Hermione a brand new copy of Hogwarts.: A History because she had already worn out her old copy. Hermione gave Harry a huge bag of chocolate frogs and Ron was given the new Quidditch board game. Ron gave Harry a wand polisher Hermione opened the small box Ron handed her.

"Oh, Ron!" she gasped as she opened the small black box revealing a pair of sapphire earrings. "They’re beautiful!"

Ron smiled and blushed. "I knew I had to get them for you, Hermione, since your birthstone is the sapphire. September 19th is the most special day in the world because it was the day you were born."

They were high above the grounds of Hogwarts., the magic carpet taking them over the lake and hills.

"I can show you the world," Ron sang. "Shining, shimmery, splendid. Tell me princess, now when did you last let your heart decide?" He put his arms around Hermione and held her close. "I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder. Over side ways and under on a magic carpet ride. A whole new world, a new fantastic point of view. No one to tell us no or where to go or say we’re only dreaming."

"A whole new world," Hermione started to sing. "A dazzling place I never knew. But now from way up here, it’s crystal clear that now I’m in a whole new world with you." She gazed down at the trees and fields below them. "Unbelievable sights, indescribable feelings! Soaring, tumbling, free wheeling through an endless diamond sky. A whole new world!"

"Don’t you dare close your eyes," sang Ron.

"A hundred thousand things to see," sang Hermione.

"Hold your breath, it gets better," sang Ron.

They sang together now in unison: "I’m like a shooting star, I’ve come so far. I can’t go back to where I used to be. A whole new world with new horizons to pursue. I’ll chase them anywhere, there’s time to spare. Let me share this whole new world with you."

"A whole new world."

"A whole new world."

"That’s where we’ll be."

"Where we will be."

"Aww, Ron, you shouldn’t have." She leaned over to kiss him and their kiss turned into a make-out session making Harry feel uncomfortable. He cleared his throat and they jumped apart.

"Er, sorry, mate," said Ron.

Harry grinned. "No problem."

"Oh, Ron, I’m going to miss you so much when I’m in Spain," said Hermione. "I’ll miss you too, Harry."

"Just be sure to bring us back a souvenir," Ron said with a wink.

* * *

Harry and Ginny spent as much time as they could together alone during the holidays.

"Ginny, when are we going to let people know we’re together?" Harry asked her as they sat snuggled on a couch in the Common Room together. Everyone else was outside having a snowball fight.

Ginny had asked Harry not to tell anyone they were together until she found a way to break the news gently to her brothers. They were very protective of her and were ready to murder any guy she was dating...even if it was Harry.

"Soon...I promise. I just don’t know how to tell Ron and my other brothers that we’re dating."

"Gin, I really appreciate you looking out for my well-being, but I don’t think you have to worry about your brother’s beating me to a pulp. I am Ron’s best friend."

"Yes, but in a way, that’s going to make it even more difficult to tell him."

"Really? You think? Why?"

"Well, think about it. If you had a younger sister, what would you think if she started dating Ron?"

Harry pondered this for a moment and then finally said, "Well, considering I don’t have a younger sister, I can’t really express my feelings about this."

Ginny playfully hit him with a pillow. "I just don’t think Ron is going to be fine about his best friend dating his little sister. Oh sure, I’m sure he’ll get used to it. We just need a way to break it to him – and my other brothers – gently."

"Okay, fair enough." He leaned in closer to her and gave her a loving kiss. "But promise me you’ll tell them soon because I’m tired of sneaking around just to kiss you!"

"Okay," Ginny agreed. "Now why don’t we go out and join the snowball fight before they start to wonder where we are."

* * * * *

"Happy Christmas, Voldie," Michael Bay said handing his lover a red box with a green bow tied around it.

"Oh, Michael, you shouldn’t have!" Voldemort cried with delight as his white, skeletal hands took the box. He opened it and found red silk boxer shorts with snowmen on them.

"I got them in red so they would match your beautiful eyes," Michael told him.

"Oh, they’re just wonderful!" Voldemort said giving his lover a kiss. "I’m afraid my gift isn’t as nice. Here." He handed Michael a small black box.

"A piece of volcanic rock!" Michael exclaimed as he opened the box. "I’ll treasure it forever, Voldie."

"You know Michael, since it’s Christmas Eve, I say we forget about being evil dominators of the world and just enjoy the peace and warmth of the day."

"Of course. We do need a break from all our evil plotting anyway."

Voldie raised his arms over head and started to sing in a deep voice, "It's Christmastime; there's no need to be afraid. At Christmastime, we let in light and we banish shade."

Michael put his arm around him and crooned, "And in our world of plenty we can spread a smile of joy. Throw your arms around the world at Christmastime!"

Scene cuts to Draco who is looking out his window at Malfoy Manor at the snow covered grounds. "But say a prayer to pray for the other ones. At Christmastime it's hard, but when you're having fun, there's a world outside your window. And it's a world of dread and fear where the only water flowing is the bitter sting of tears."

Scene cuts to Harry who is in the Common Room singing as he decorated a Christmas tree. "And the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of doom. Well tonight thank Merlin it's them instead of you."

Scene cuts to Hermione who is singing on a beach in Barcelona. "And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmastime. The greatest gift they'll get this year is life. Oh, where nothing ever grows, no rain or rivers flow. Do they know it's Christmastime at all?"

Scene cuts to elves and pixies dancing in the snow and playing flutes.

Scene cuts to the Great Hall where Dumbledore is hosting the Christmas feast with the teachers and the students who stayed for the holiday break. Ron raises his goblet as she sings, "Here's to you, raise a glass for everyone."

Harry also raises his goblet as he sings, "Here's to them, underneath that burning sun."

Everyone else raises their tumblers in unison as they sing, "Do they know it's Christmastime at all?"

They were high above the grounds of Hogwarts., the magic carpet taking them over the lake and hills.

"I can show you the world," Ron sang. "Shining, shimmery, splendid. Tell me princess, now when did you last let your heart decide?" He put his arms around Hermione and held her close. "I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder. Over side ways and under on a magic carpet ride. A whole new world, a new fantastic point of view. No one to tell us no or where to go or say we’re only dreaming."

"A whole new world," Hermione started to sing. "A dazzling place I never knew. But now from way up here, it’s crystal clear that now I’m in a whole new world with you." She gazed down at the trees and fields below them. "Unbelievable sights, indescribable feelings! Soaring, tumbling, free wheeling through an endless diamond sky. A whole new world!"

"Don’t you dare close your eyes," sang Ron.

"A hundred thousand things to see," sang Hermione.

"Hold your breath, it gets better," sang Ron.

They sang together now in unison: "I’m like a shooting star, I’ve come so far. I can’t go back to where I used to be. A whole new world with new horizons to pursue. I’ll chase them anywhere, there’s time to spare. Let me share this whole new world with you."

"A whole new world."

"A whole new world."

"That’s where we’ll be."

"Where we will be."

"Aww, Ron, you shouldn’t have." She leaned over to kiss him and their kiss turned into a make-out session making Harry feel uncomfortable. He cleared his throat and they jumped apart.

"Er, sorry, mate," said Ron.

Harry grinned. "No problem."

"Oh, Ron, I’m going to miss you so much when I’m in Spain," said Hermione. "I’ll miss you too, Harry."

"Just be sure to bring us back a souvenir," Ron said with a wink.

* * *

Harry and Ginny spent as much time as they could together alone during the holidays.

"Ginny, when are we going to let people know we’re together?" Harry asked her as they sat snuggled on a couch in the Common Room together. Everyone else was outside having a snowball fight.

Ginny had asked Harry not to tell anyone they were together until she found a way to break the news gently to her brothers. They were very protective of her and were ready to murder any guy she was dating...even if it was Harry.

"Soon...I promise. I just don’t know how to tell Ron and my other brothers that we’re dating."

"Gin, I really appreciate you looking out for my well-being, but I don’t think you have to worry about your brother’s beating me to a pulp. I am Ron’s best friend."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That night at dinner, Professor Dumbledore had two special announcements. "Students, may I please have you attention. First of all, I would like to welcome you back after your Christmas holidays. I hope you all had a wonderful holiday and I wish you a very happy New Year. Second of all, I would like to announce that in a few weeks we will be having the first annual Hogwarts Talent Show!" The Great Hall buzzed with excitement. "If you would like to participate, please see your House’s Headmaster to get a form. We except all kinds of talents – singing, dancing, comedy skits, instruments, anything! Also, you may be in as many skits as your heart desires."

"A talent show!" Ron said excitedly turning his attention back to Hermione and Harry. "Are you guys going to sign up for it?"

Harry shrugged. "Maybe. Though I don’t know what I would do."

"You could recite a poem about Quidditch," Hermione joked.

"Ha ha, very funny. And perhaps you could lull everybody asleep by reciting every fascinating fact in Hogwarts: A History?" He said the word "fascinating" with a sarcastic tone.

"Well, I’m gonna sign up," said Ron. "Though I don’t know what I’ll do either."

"I’m sure whatever you decide, it will be great," Hermione said as she leaned over to kiss him on the cheek.

"And as for the second announcement," Dumbledore continued, "it has been decided that each Quidditch team should have their own cheerleading team and next week try outs will be held for seven spots on each team. That is all. Carry on."