I’m Not a Muggle Not Yet a Wizard

Also a big thanks to Jane from the HJO boards for volunteering to be in my story and a big thanks to Rachel my proofreader!

Some of this story is comedy and some of it’s more serious, but I hope you all enjoy it!

I’m Not a Muggle Not Yet a Wizard

By Mariposa

Chapter 7

 

 

 

Ginny and Gillian were in the library writing an essay for Snape’s class, or at least trying to.

Suddenly they were (gladly) interrupted by their friend, Jane Roberts, a fifth year Ravenclaw who was coming their way.

"Ginny, is it true?" she asked as she pulled up a chair across from the redhead.

"Is what true?"

"Are you really dating Draco Malfoy?"

"What?!" Gillian hissed in a low voice. "You never told me that!"

"I never told you because it isn’t true! I’m not dating him." She glared at Jane. "Who told you that, anyway?"

Jane shrugged. "Well you went to the Halloween Dance with him."

"That doesn’t mean anything!"

"I heard you snogged him."

Ginny groaned. "Keep in mind I was drunk. All I remember is that I passed out and woke up in the hospital wing. At least he had the decency to take me there."

Jane started to giggle. "It wasn’t Malfoy who took you there. It was Harry!"

Ginny looked surprised. "Harry! As in Harry Potter?"

"No," Jane said sarcastically. "As in Harry Carrey. Of course it was Potter. Apparently your brother freaked out when he found you and Malfoy were missing-"

Ginny rolled her eyes. "What else is new?"

"-so he asked Harry to find you."

"Oh, wonderful, he saw me passed out, "Ginny groaned.

Jane giggled again. "That wasn’t the only thing he saw!"

"Huh?"

"He saw you snogging Malfoy."

"Oh crap!"

"What are you talking about?" cried Gillian. "That’s great! Now he’s jealous!"

"But if he tells Ron, I’ll be dead! Not to mention Malfoy, but I’m more worried about myself."

"Well, as far as I know, Ron doesn’t know," said Jane. "And Harry was jealous! I could tell. He kept shooting death glares at Malfoy during the dance all night."

At that moment Madame Pince (is that he name?) came in sight and glared at them. Ginny hadn’t realized they were no longer whispering.

"Please keep quiet. Do remember you are in a library."

"Sorry," the three girls mumbled.

"Well, I have to go," Jane whispered. "We’ll chat later, okay?"

* * * * *

Harry, Ron, and Hermione were walking outside complaining about Snape and how he had given them way too much homework. Well, actually only Harry and Ron were complaining about this. Hermione kept saying something about "enriching minds."

"Oh, Hermione, do shut up," Ron snapped. "That bastard of a teacher gave us 300 pages to read in just two days! Not even you can read that much."

"Ronald Weasley!" Hermione exclaimed. "Didn’t your mother tell you not to curse?"

Ron grinned. "My mum’s not here."

"And besides, he didn’t give the Slytherins that much to read," Harry grumbled.

"Because he favors them," Ron grumbled back. "Little perfect Malfoy can do no wrong in his book."

Just thinking about Malfoy made Harry think about him kissing Ginny and that made Harry’s fists clench.

"Why, Hermione, you’re looking awfully pretty today," they heard a voice say from behind them.

"Oh, Lord, not him again," Hermione muttered as they turned around and saw Mervin Crunk.

He grinned and walked up to them. Harry saw that Ron was seething.

"You know, you never did dance with me at the party."

"I told you, I never wanted to dance with you!" Hermione said, her chin held high. "I don’t like you. I think you are annoying and rude and a pervert who thinks he’s better than other people."

"I do not think I’m better than anyone! I just know a lot more than other people."

"Nobody knows more than Hermione!" said Ron. "And if you think you’re so smart, how come you’re not in Ravenclaw, huh?"

Mervin scowled at Ron and started to take Hermione’s hand. At that moment Ron snapped and jumped on Mervin, making them fall hard to the ground. His brown eyes were blazing. (Does Ron have brown eyes? I don't know, let's just say he does. Although I think he might have blue eyes).

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING, YOU DISGUSTING FAT PIG? YOU KEEP YOUR FILTHY PAWS OFF OF MY GIRLFRIEND! I AM SICK OF YOU COMING ON TO HER ALL THE TIME. I OUGHT TO KILL YOU! LEAVE HER THE HELL ALONE YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"

As he was screaming this, he was also punching Mervin in the face and chest and broke his glasses.

Mervin cried out in pain. "AWWWWW! OWWWWW! SHIT! STOP IT!"

"RON!" cried Hermione as she and Harry ran over to them.

Harry tried to pull Ron off Mervin, but had no luck. He was now giving Mervin a black eye and bloody nose.

"Ronald Gregory Weasley! You stop that right now before you get expelled!" Hermione yelled loudly.

This made Ron stop.

"You’re a freaking lunatic, you know that!" Mervin cried as he got up.

"Maybe that will teach you to keep away from my girlfriend!" Ron growled.

Mervin glared at them and stomped off, most likely to the hospital wing.

When he disappeared, Hermione flung herself at Ron. "Oh, Ron, how could you have been so stupid! You’re going to get detention for this and you could have been easily hurt! Mervin is MUCH bigger than you are. You’re lucky you weren’t hurt."

"I’m sorry I scared you Hermione, but I was just getting fed up with that bastard coming on to you all the time! How dare he!"

Hermione kissed Ron firmly on the lips. "Just promise me you’ll never do it again."

* * * * *

For Ron’s detention he had to wash all the bedsheets in the Gryffindor rooms – without magic of course. He grumbled, but reminded himself he was doing this for Hermione. At least that fat, perverted, disgusting Slytherin had stopped bugging her. When he was FINALLY done, he joined the others in the Common Room. He sat next to Hermione who was reading. Harry and the twins were playing Exploding Snap and Ginny and Gillian were lying down by the fireplace talking about something and giggling.

"Are you done?" Hermione asked him putting her book down.

Ron nodded. "It took me forever, but at last I’m done."

At that moment Professor McGonagall stepped into the room. "Potter, come with me please! We’ve got something to discuss."

Harry gulped, quickly racking his brain to think if he had done anything wrong recently. He was led into Dumbledore’s office and quickly sighed a breath of relief when they just wanted to update him about the time turner they were fixing so Britney could return back home.

"It seems like it’s going to be another few months before it’s complete," Dumbledore told him.

Harry’s jaw dropped open. "A couple more months??!"

"Looks that way," Dumbledore replied. "We just wanted to update you on the progress."

Harry mumbled something and headed back to the Gryffindor Common Room.

* * * * *

Oliver Wood was beaming at Harry and Ron at their next PE class. "Great job at the Quidditch match against Ravenclaw," he told them. "You kicked their butts! You’re going to make a great captain, Harry. I feel honored having you following my footsteps."

Harry flushed proudly. "Gee, thanks, Oliver."

"Hey, here comes Charlie," Ron said as he saw his older brother.

Walking on either side of him were two GORGEOUS, sexy, beautiful, ravishing witches. One was Asian with gorgeous black hair and looked like Lucy Liu, the other had beautiful red hair and very pale skin and looked like Nicole Kidman. They looked like the just stepped out of the covers of Vanity Witch.

"Hi, Oliver," Charlie said waving. "Mandy and Sara just came from London to visit us since we’re both teaching here now."

The pretty redhead went over to Oliver and gave him a kiss.

"This is my girlfriend, Mandy Gilles," Oliver told his class. (Gillian gave a disappointed sigh). "She and Charlie’s girlfriend, Sara Cheong (he nodded at the other beautiful witch) live in London. Mandy is an accomplished synchronized broomsticker and Sara is a dragon groomer. That’s how she and Charlie met."

"Wow, you won the gold medal at the Magic Olympics in Krakatoa, didn’t you?" Padma asked gazing at Mandy in awe.

Mandy nodded. "Just barely though. The witch who won silver was just a tenth of a point behind me."

"Will you be at the next Magic Olympics?" asked Seamus.

Mandy nodded again. "Next year while the Muggles are in Atlanta, I’ll be in Knossos, trying to gain another gold."

"Whoa, Charlie’s girlfriend is HOT!" Ron whispered to Harry who nodded in agreement.

"Oliver sure knows how to pick them too."

They heard a scowling noise behind them and turned to see Hermione glaring at Ron.

"What?" he asked.

"Stop drooling over your brother’s girlfriend!" she snapped.

Harry decided to bite his tongue and keep from telling Hermione that she had been drooling over Charlie when Professor Dumbledore introduced him at their first day of school.

"Well, I gotta get back to my classes," said Charlie. "Mandy wanted to come and see you, Oliver, so I hoped we didn’t interrupt him."

"No problem," Oliver said, his arm still around Mandy’s waist. "I’ve missed my exquisite enchanted sorceress." He kissed her again.

Charlie walked off with his arm over Sara’s shoulder.

"Why must the cute ones always have girlfriends?" Gillian whispered to Ginny.

Ginny tried to stifle a laugh. "Ah, come on now, he was too old for you, Gilly-bean. And besides, you think Draco is cute and he doesn’t have a girlfriend."

Gillian rolled her eyes. "But he’s a jerk!"

"Okay, everyone start doing their warm ups!" Oliver said. He grabbed his girlfriend and took her under a tree. "And we’ll do our own warm ups," he said as he started to kiss her.

"Oliver!" she exclaimed. "We can’t make out in front of your students!"

"They’re not paying attention," Oliver said as he started kissing her neck. "They’re doing their sit ups."

He kissed her once more as the class said "OOOOHHHH!"

Mandy rolled her eyes. "Yeah right, they really aren’t paying attention."

Oliver grinned sheepishly. He turned to his students. "Oh, stop being so immature!"

Mandy went to take a seat in the soft grass as Oliver turned his attention on the students once they had finished their exercises.

"Today we’re going to run a couple of laps around the school."

The class erupted into groans.

"You just want us out of your hair so you can make out with your girlfriend," Draco whined.

Oliver smirked. "No, that’s what was planned today. Honestly! All right, three laps around the school! Go!"

The students started to run, but once they were out of Oliver’s sight, they slowed down to a walking pace.

"This sucks," Ron whined to Harry. "I can’t believe we have to run around this freaking castle."

Draco had walked up beside him, smirking. "Well, you have to admit the view is nice." He nodded at Ginny who was walking in front of them next to Gillian and Hermione.

"Why you little bastard!" Ron boiled. "If I weren’t already in enough trouble for beating up Mervin, you’d be dead by now!"

"Oh, give it a rest, Weasley. Stop treating your sister like a damn six year old all the time."

"Stop treating Ginny like she’s a piece of meat!" Harry hissed at him.

"Stay out of this, Potter!" Draco snapped. He smirked at Ron. "Your sister’s a pretty good litter snogger, you know that?"

Ron’s face went red. "WHAT?!"

"You heard me."

"You were snogging my sister! Where? When?"

"At the dance. Actually I would have kissed her longer if you’re annoying little friend here hadn’t come and interrupted us."

Ron turned to Harry with fire in his eyes. "You knew Malfoy kissed Ginny and you didn’t tell me!"

"I didn’t want to get you upset!" Harry cried. "Like you are now." He turned to Malfoy. "Besides, the kiss didn’t mean anything since you had her all drunk."

Draco rolled her eyes. "For the tenth time, I didn’t get her drunk."

"You better stay away from my sister or I’ll kill you!"

"Is that a threat?"

"What do you think?"

"I think you’re nothing but a poor redheaded wizard freak who has a Mudblood for a girlfriend and somebody who thinks he’s so great just because he has a scar on his forehead for a best friend." Draco grinned at Ron, then went to join Crabbe and Goyle.

Ron muttered something under his breath. Harry didn’t quite catch it, but it sounded an awfully lot like it rhymed with "Ducking castard."

Oblivious to what was going on behind them, Ginny, Gillian and Hermione were enjoying their walk. This was something Hermione could handle. She and Gillian had started singing the lyrics to Dancing Queen.

"Ohhh! You can dance! You can dance! Having the time of your life! Ohhh! See that girl, watch that scene. Digging the dancing queen!"

"Friday night and the lights are lowwwwwww," Gillian sang between giggles, "looking out for a place to gooooo. Where they play the right music, getting in the swing. You come in to look for a king."

Hermione sang the next line: "Anybody could be that guyyyy. Night is young and the music’s highhhhh. With a bit of rock music, everything is fine. You’re in the mood for dance."

They sang together now: "And when you get the chance…you are the dancing queen! Young and sweet! Only seventeen! Dancing queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine. OHHHHH YEAHHH! YOU CAN DANCE! YOU CAN DANCE! HAVING THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE! OHHH! SEE THAT GIRL, WATCH THAT SCENE, DIGGING THE DANCING QUEEN!"

They collapsed into giggles and Ginny shook her head at them. "You two are insane!"

"Oh, God, I love that song," Gillian said still laughing.

"Me too," said Hermione. "It’s one of my guilty pleasures."

"ABBA ROX!" Gillian cried out suddenly and laughed.

"Say, Gillian," Hermione said. "Speaking of ABBA, have you ever seen Muriel’s Wedding?"

"Are you kidding me!" Gillian exclaimed. "I love that movie. Toni Collette is my favorite actress."

"Yeah, she’s an acting genius," Hermione agreed.

"Madame Treelawney said her next movie in a few more years is going to be something with seeing dead people," said Gillian. "She’ll play the mother to that little kid who was Forrest Gump Jr."

"Aww," said Hermione. "He’s so cute. I liked Forrest Gump, but I still thought The Shawshank Redemption should have won the Oscar."

Gillian nodded. "I agree. I thought that movie was better. Morgan Freeman is one of my favorite actors. Did you ever see Driving Miss Daisy with Jessica Tandy?"

Hermione shook her head. "No, I’ll have to rent that one of these days. But speaking of

Jessica Tandy, I have seen Coccoon."

"I LOVE that movie!" said Gillian her blue eyes twinkling. "Ron Howard is such an awesome director."

"Oh, I love Ron!" Hermione gushed. "And not just because his name is Ron and he has red hair."

The two girls giggled.

"Ron Howard?" said a voice. Hermione groaned when she recognized it belong to Mervin.

Hermione sighed. "What do you want now, Mervin?"

"You can’t possibly like the directing of Ron Howard! He’s Opie freaking Cunningham for God’s sake! I’m telling you, if he ever wins an Oscar, God forbid, it will be an atrocity."

Hermione put her hands on her hips. "Stop acting like such a critic wannabe, Mervin. And I happen to like Ron Howard.’

"Me too," said Gillian.

"Me too," said Ginny even though she had no idea who Ron Howard was.

Mervin rolled her eyes. "You people are hopeless! Ron Howard is not a real director! A real director is someone like Stanley Kubric. He makes his movies out to be cinematic achievements."

Gillian snorted and Mervin glared at her.

"Damn it, Mervin!" cried Hermione. "I’m sick of your holier than thou, I’m know everything about movies, attitude!"

"Hmph. You just don’t appreciate fine art!" Mervin huffed away.

"Oh my God! What a loser!" said Ginny.

* * * * *

Charlie, Sara, Oliver, and Mandy had joined the others at lunch.

"Charlie, you never told me you had such a cute little brother," Sara said smiling at Ron who blushed. "He’s so adorable!"

Charlie rolled his eyes. "Trust me, once you get to know him, he’s not so "adorable."

"Why, hello there!"

"Watch out you two," Hermione warned Sara and Mandy as Mervin Crunk approached them. "This guy’s a real loser."

The two sista witchas looked at Mervin who plopped his fat ass down across from them.

"Mervin, what the hell do you think you’re doing here?" Ron demanded. "This is the Gryffindor table! Go back to the slimy Slytherin table where you belong."

Mervin ignored him. He was grinning at Sara and Mandy. "You two must be an overdue library book because the word FINE is just printed all over you."

Mandy and Sara looked at him, then looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"Say, Mandy, doesn’t he remind you of somebody?" asked Sara.

"Yeah," said Sara. "He reminds me of that guy who posts at the Wizard Actors boards. The one who calls himself Mr. Critic."

"But the one we call DSP," Mandy said and the two girls sniggered.

"He looks an awfully lot like him too," said Sara. "Really fat, glasses.."

"You don’t happen to post at the Cinephile boards and read "Nifty Erotic" stories, do you?" Mandy asked Mervin.

"You bet I do!" said Mervin. "I also subscribe to Play Wizard and Pent Castle. You two witch babes should pose for Play Witch."

"Eww! You watch what you say, you little pervert!" said Sara.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Told ya he’s a loser!"

Meanwhile at the other end of the table Ginny and Gillian sat. Their friend, Colin Creevy, interrupted them.

"Hey, girlfriends," he said snapping his fingers in front of his face. "Mind if Justin and I sit here."

"Sure, go ahead," Ginny replied.

Colin and his boyfriend, Justin Fitch-Fletchery took a seat across from the girls. Everyone knew they had both come out of the (broom) closet last summer.

"So, Ginny, tell me the 411 on you and Harry," Colin said as he bit into his pastrami and provolone sandwich. "I hear he has his pretty green eyes on you, girlfriend, mmmhmmm."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Boy, nothing gets past this school, does it?"

Gillian giggled. "You think Harry’s cute, Colin?"

"Oh hell yes, girlfriend! Why do you think I kept following him all around during my first year?" He winked at them and they groaned.

"Too bad for you Harry doesn’t swing that way," said Gillian. There was a twinkle in his eye. "Or does he? You know he and Draco Malfoy seem to get in a lot of spats…could be they’re deeply in love with each other."

Ginny choked on the pumpkin juice she had just swallowed. "Harry and Draco? A couple? Oh god, that’s a pair made in Valhalla."

"You know," Justin said thoughtfully, "if Draco weren’t such a snotty bastard I’d do things to him that would make him cry out for his mommy. He’s pretty yummy."

"Whoa-oa!" Gillian cried holding up her hand. "That was WAY too much information."

Justin held up his own hand. "Talk to the hand, girlfriend, mmmhmmm."

"You better get your pretty little hands on pretty Potter before he gets snatched up, Ginny," said Colin. "Cuz he is all that and a bag of chips, mmmhmmm."

"Mmmhmm," agreed Justin.

"Mmmmhmm," replied Gillian just for the hell of it.

* * * * *

November had turned into December and snow had fallen everywhere around Hogswarts, making the grounds look like a picturesque Christmas card. The students buzzed with excitement after Dumbledore announced there would be a Yule Ball before the winter holidays began. It was three weeks away.

"Oh, another ball!" Hermione said happily. "I had such a good time at the last one."

"But you’re going to have an even better time at this one because I’m taking you," said Ron. "And not that overgrown idiot who can’t even say your name right."

"Oh, Ron," sighed Hermione. "He was from a foreign country. Give Victor a break." She smiled. "And I’d be honored to go with you."

"You have any idea who you’re going to invite, Harry?" Ron asked. "Gonna try for Cho Chang? I don’t think Parvati Patil will go with you this year." He laughed.

Harry opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by Fred and George.

"So Ronnie do you have a date for the Yule Ball yet?" Fred asked.

"Of course he does, Fred!" said George. "He’s going with Hermione. She’s our little brother’s girlfriend!"

Ron rolled his eyes. "The Yule Ball was just announced and yes, of course I have a date. I’m going with Hermione! Who else would I go with?"

Hermione smiled.

"I’m going with Angelina of course and George here is going with Katie Bell."

"Katie Bell?" said Hermione. "I thought you went to the Halloween Dance with Alicia, George," said Hermione.

 

"I did. But Lee took Katie to the Halloween dance and now wants to take Alicia to this dance, so we’re switching."

"Do you have a date yet, Harry?" Fred asked.

"Er, not yet."

George winked at him. "You should ask our little sister. I don’t think she’s mad at you anymore."

"The hell he will!" Ron cried. "Harry will not be asking Ginny to any dance."

Fred rolled his eyes. "Calm down, Ron. It’s just a dance."

Harry gave a weak smile. "And I still have three weeks to find a date, right?"

* * * * *

Ginny was sitting with Gillian in the Gryffindor Common Room. She sighed heavily. "Only three weeks until the Yule Ball and I still don’t have a date."

"Three weeks is still a lot of time," Gillian reassured her. "And I don’t have a date yet either."

"Now, now what are you two talking about?" Colin had come over to join them. "You’re both beautiful girls and you’ll find a date for the Yule Ball. Why, if I didn’t play for the other Quidditch team, I’d have a hard time deciding which one of you I would ask to the dance, mmmhmmm."

Ginny smiled. "Thanks, Colin."

"Girl, you know I was serious about Harry, mmmhmm," said Colin. "You should ask him to the dance. He’d be a damned fool to say no to you, girlfriend! Mmmmmhmmm!" He snapped his fingers and moved his neck in a swift motion.

"But I can’t ask him!" Ginny cried. "I just can’t! I turn red whenever I go near him and my legs get weak."

"Why?" asked Gillian. "He’s just a skinny geek with glasses and messy hair."

"Oh, no he’s much more than that," Ginny sighed and Colin sighed too.

"Mmmmhmmm, you said it girlfriend. He is ALL that and a bag of chocolate frogs. Yummy. Mmmhmm."

Ginny gave Colin an odd look. "Er, yeah."

"You should ask him tomorrow, Ginny," said Gillian.

"Tomorrow," said Colin. He started to sing: "The sun will come out tomorrow, tomorrow."

"Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there’ll be sun." sang Gillian.

"Just thinking about tomorrow clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow," sang Colin. "Till there’s none."

Gillian sang next, "When you start with a day that’s gray and lonely, I just stick out my chin and grin and say –"
Colin joined her: "Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love you! Tomorrow! You’re always a day away!"

"You two are nuts, you know that?" said Ginny.

Colin and Gillian grinned at each other. "Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love ya! Tomorrow! You’re always a day away! Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love ya! Tomorrow! You’re always a DAYYYYYYYYYYY AAAAAAAAWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!"

"If I ask him, will you please stop singing that song?" said Ginny.

Colin and Gillian nodded.

At that moment, Erroll, the Weasley family owl flew into the room and dropped a letter in Ginny’s lap and flew out again. Ginny saw that her name was neatly written with a fancy quill pen. She opened the envelope and read the card that fell out.

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "It’s a wedding invitation!"

Ohhh! Cliffhanger! Can you guess who’s getting married? Coming up in the next chapter: Ginny asks Harry to the Yule Ball! Ron and Hermione get in a spat! Uh oh!