Rating:
PG-13
House:
Riddikulus
Genres:
Humor Parody
Era:
Multiple Eras
Spoilers:
Philosopher's Stone Chamber of Secrets Prizoner of Azkaban Goblet of Fire
Stats:
Published: 07/25/2002
Updated: 08/25/2002
Words: 4,872
Chapters: 8
Hits: 8,003

MTV Diary: Harry Potter Style

Allykat

Story Summary:
The characters of Harry Potter have decided to take part in a special season of MTV Diary. Watch as the chosen few reveal secrets, goof off, and make fools out of themselves.

MTV Diary 02

Chapter Summary:
Chapter 2 in the series. This time, Snape takes the fall.
Posted:
07/25/2002
Hits:
745

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Professor Snape is in front of a black background)

SNAPE: You think you know, but you have no idea.

This is the diary of Severus Snape.

(Screen says: Prof. Severus Snape: Spiteful Sorcerer)

SNAPE: I am NOT spiteful! You're just jealous of my fashion sense!

***************

<>

(In dungeon, Gryffindor seventh years, making a sleeping draught, Oliver Wood is struggling, and our dear Professor is getting frustrated. )

SNAPE: No...Wood...don't do that....

WOOD: Ah, I've got it, Professor....

SNAPE: Five points from Gryffindor for talking back....

PERCY: Damn you, Oliver!.

SNAPE: Ten points from Gryffindor for foul language.

PERCY: But...but...I'm Head Boy!

SNAPE: Ten more points from Gryffindor for talking back....

(All of a sudden, Wood's potion blows up. The class evacuates the dungeons)

SNAPE: Twenty points from Gryffindor!

PERCY: (to Wood) I hate you.

<>

**************CM BREAK**********

(Hermione steps out yet again from the SPEW curtain)

HERMIONE: Please join SPEW and save the House-Elves. Only two Sickles to join! Again, I beg you! The number is: 1-800-SPEW-YOU. Once again, the number is: 1-800-SPEW-YOU.

(She steps back)

****************************

<

I hope that Slytherin wins again this year. I don't want McGonagall to keep boasting about how great the Gryffindor squad is...it's annoying!>>

(Great hall)

DUMBLEDORE: And the winner of this year's House Cup is Gryffindor, for the third year straight!

(Gryffindors cheer)

<>

(Staff room)

MCGONAGALL: We won, you lost...and you suck, Severus! Third year in the running, woo-hoo!

<>

*************************

<>

(Slytherin common room: everyone is wearing pink fluffy bunny pajamas and slippers)

MALFOY: Professor, I can't believe we didn't win!

SNAPE: I know, Draco. We'll get it next year.

<>

MALFOY: It's all Potter's fault!

CRABBE: Yeah.

GOYLE: Yah baby!

COMMON ROOM: What?

GOYLE: C'mon, haven't you ever seen Austin Powers?

ALL: No.

BLAISE: Isn't that a Muggle movie?

PANSY: Goyle, you're an idiot.

<>