Ginny Weasley and the Annoyance of the Ferret

Ginny Weasley and the Annoyance of the FerretChapter OneIn the Weasley House  

Crap. Crap, oh crap, oh crappity-crap crap. She has caught me. The Weasley girl has caught me. She is looking at me curiously and....SHE IS POKING ME! SHE IS &^%#ING POKING ME!!!

"Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!" I squealed, thrashing every which way, trying to get out of her grip. Alas, I realized too late my mistake.

The Weasley girl's eyes widened in horror and fear. She screamed and threw me across the room, "DEMON FERRET!!!"

"Demon ferret?" I groaned."Where?"

The Weasley girl leaned down to look at me and hesitantly reached out a hand.

However, I decided to give her a good talking-to, "OUCH! That freaking HURT, Mudblood lover!" I screeched, flipping back onto my feet. And boy, did it ever hurt. OUCH!

"What the hell?" The Weasley girl's eyes were wide as she stared at me from across the room.

"Ginny? Ginny, is everything all right?" Down the stairs came her brother - BAH! - and horror, of all horrors, Potter. What was I going to do if he saw me like this. Unfortunately, I had no time to act as Weasley picked me up with a curious expression. Oooh, this was too good a chance to miss. I bit him on the nose. He dropped me. Ouch. That's the second time I've been dropped today. Owie.

"It bit me!" Weasley was hollering, "It bit me!" He glared at me with hostility. I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Is this what you were screaming about, Ginny?" Potter inquired. Ginny nodded, her eyes still wide.

"Did it bite you too?" Weasley was shooting murderous looks at me now.

"No," Ginny said. I covered my head with my furry paws. Paws, I tell you! Have you ever seen anything more indignified on a Malfoy?

"Did that ferret just stick it's tongue out?" Potter remarked.

"No, Potter, you idiot, I stuck my tongue out three seconds ago!" I grumbled.

"It's squeaking," Weasley commented, still glowering at me.
 
"I'm talking, you ass!" I hollered.

Giving me a weird look, the Weasley girl stepped over to me. Oh, no. No, no, no! I quickly hurried away and scurried under the nearest thing. Which happened to be the stove.

"What is going on down here?" came a thunderous voice.

"Oh...Percy..." came the voice of that Weasley girl...Ginny, was it? Whatever.

"Could you please keep it down?" came the voice that had been speaking earlier. Only now, it was not thunderous, but very, very techy. Pfft. Doesn't concern me.

"Sorry, Perce," came the voice of Weasley, "But there's a ferret."

"A ferret?"

I almost laughed aloud as I heard the disbelieveability in his voice.

"You honestly expect me to believe there's a ferret in the kitchen, Ron?"

Well, duh! Hello! Over here! Under the stove!

"It bit me!" Weasley sounded extremely pissed. Personally, I thought he had deserved it.

"Right."

Snicker, snicker. Hahaha. Stupid Weasleys.

"It's under the stove," the girl spoke up, "And it's my new pet."

Crap.

"Could you get it out, please Percy?" I could almost hear the sap dripping from her voice.

"Fine, but no more distractions. I am doing highly important work."

"Right, like caudron bottom thickness reports?" Weasley snickered.

Caudron bottom thickness reports? Caudron bottom thickness reports? What the hell?

God, these Weasleys are freaks.

Crap.

Here comes a hand. Run!

I ran out from under the stove. And was caught by the Wealsey girl.

Damn, I say. Life is so unfair. I feel a pout coming on.

...

Have you ever seen a ferret pout?

...

Can a ferret pout?

"Thanks, Percy." The Wealsey girl smiled at her brother, holding me tightly. And almost cutting off my circulation. I mean, hello, even us Malfoys have to breathe sometime!

Now, she's turned and walking up stairs.

Nooooooooooooo!!!!

The door is becoming more and more unreachable.

...

Have I mentione that this really, really sucks?