The Diary

Poll Time~ Recently there have been reports that Ewan McGregor has been approached to play the character Remus J. Lupin, the DADA Professor, for the third Harry Potter film (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban). How do you feel about this?

Chapter 8

~Dream~

“'Allo, Draco,” said a voice through the mist.

“Where am I?” he asked as he spun around trying to figure out who spoke.

“You are where I am. You are here,” the feminine voice answered as a shape began to materialize. Draco Malfoy felt an icy chill go down his spine. Whoever it is, they are standing right behind him and he now knew it. He spun quickly on his heels to face whatever was there, but what he faced was more frightening than he had imagined. “I see that you remember me,” she laughed as he fell back in shock.

From the ground he looked up at the apparition. She was wearing a silver dress robe that shimmered in the lighted mist. Her silver feathered mask added to her mystery and his intrigue. Even if he couldn’t see her face he knew who it was. She looked like she had just walked out of his favorite memory of them together. Her dark hair fell in curled ringlets around her face. Her deep blue eyes shined through the silver of her mask and met his ice blue eyes. Her warm smile was just as he remembered, all those years ago. He had loved her once but, even after they had parted, he had always loved her smile. He slowly lifted himself off the ground and stared into the blue depths of her eyes. She reached up and removed her mask and looked at him.

“Kali,” he breathed. She merely nodded as he ran up and hugged her. She hugged him back. He let go of her and spoke. “I’ve missed you. I haven’t had anyone but Ginny since you… since you…” he said.

“Died? I may be dead but I am not gone,” she said, “I’ve missed you too, Draco. How could I not miss my best friend?”

“Why did you have to go and get yourself killed?” he asked.

“I can’t tell you, but someone else can,” she answered.

“Who?” he asked running his fingers through his silver blonde hair.

“Thomas is on his way to find the answer and in time he will tell you all,” she said as she began to fade. Her face took a serene look as she faded into nothingness. “Goodbye for now, Draco. And I like the hair.”

“Goodbye Kali,” he whispered as darkness over took the mist.

~End Dream~

He bolted upright, drenched in sweat yet he was oddly calm. He ran his pale fingers through his silver blonde damp hair. He smirked at her last comment. He had cut his hair in fifth year and stopped gelling it back for her and he has kept the same hairstyle since. He felt the body next to him begin to stir from her slumber.

“Draco, why are you up? Is something the matter?” Virginia Weasley-Malfoy asked as her tired eyes tried to focus on her husband.

“No, nothing is wrong darling. Just go back to sleep,” he said as he attempted to sooth her back to sleep.

“Alright,” she yawned in response as she went back to sleep.

*Nothing is wrong. It’s just the ghost of my dead best friend visiting me in my dreams and telling me that her son knows the answers we all want to know,* he thought before falling asleep himself.

Gryffindor Common Room Dorm (Late Night)

Thomas sat in a large, red, comfy sofa in front of the fireplace. The flickering flame gleamed off his round glasses as he stared down at the empty parchment that rested on his lap. On the floor, around his feet, were scattered bits of crumpled parchment that had not met his approval. He slowly picked up his quill, dipped it in ink and began to write his letter.

Dear Dad,

Sorry I haven’t written since I got here, but I have been kind of busy. I am enjoying going to school here and Defense Against the Dark Arts has become my favorite class. I hope Professor Covington doesn’t quit after this year. Potions class is the worst. I firmly believe that Professor Snape is evil and hates me because I am the grandson of two marauders. He should just get a life and drop the grudge already. Oh! Rhiannon and I made the Gryffindor house Quidditch team as chasers. Hopefully we will be able to win the house cup this year.

This year I am eleven and old enough to attend Hogwarts, but you do not think that I am old enough to know what happened to my mum. What happened on the last days of her life? Who killed her? What’s the truth?

Love,

Thomas

He read it over and over again. After he was satisfied he folded the letter and placed it in a parchment envelope. He got up and opened his chest at the grabbed his invisibility cloak. Thomas wrapped the cloak around him tightly and clutched the letter firmly in his hand as he headed out of the common room. He walked threw the winding corridors and staircases to reach the owlery. He pushed the old oak door open and searched through the masses of owls for his own. After several minutes of sifting through the owls, he spotted his brown owl.

“Bandit, come here Bandit,” he called as the large owl flew to him and landed on his arm. “'Allo Bandit I need you to do me a favor tonight,” he said as he petted his owl, “Can you deliver this letter to my dad?” In response, Bandit stretched out his left leg and let Thomas tie the letter to it. He stretched his wings and flew out the window towards Godric’s Hollow as the young boy looked on. He stepped closer to the window and looked out at the night’s sky. The cool breeze caressed the skin of his cheeks as he closed his eyes and wondered if his father was going to respond to his inquires. He slowly turned and walked out of the room. Thomas returned to the common room, he picked up the mess that he made before going up the spiral staircase and going to sleep.

Godric’s Hollow~ Potter Residence

~Dream~

The dark void was filled with endless gray luminous fog that only rose to waist level. The fog was cool to the touch but chilled to the bone. It was no ordinary fog.

“Where am I?” shouted a confused Harry Potter as he looked around.

“You are in the place between consciousness and nothingness, between existence and oblivion. You are here,” replied the voice as it echoed in all directions, “with me.”

“Who are you?” he asked.

“The love that you once had,” said the voice as a figure began to emerge from the mist, “and the pain that you try to forget.” The figure materialized. She was wearing his favorite outfit of hers. It was far from elegant, but his favorite memories of her were the times he watched her sleep or cook breakfast in her faded black jogging pants and gray tank top.

“Kali,” he breathed in disbelief, “But…. but… you’re…”

“Dead? Yes, I know,” she finished as she stepped closer to him, “Why is it that you pictured me in these pajamas? You could have pictured me in that one number… you know which one I am talking about. The one from our first anniversary.”

“Well… ummm,” he stuttered as he began to blush at the memory.

“Why Mister Potter I do believe you are blushing,” she laughed and as her laughter died down she continued, “Well enough with the pleasantries. Tom is going to ask about me soon and I expect you to answer any questions he might have.”

“He is not old enough to know,” he answered and, as if it would justify his answer, he added, “Its too painful and he wouldn’t be able to handle it.”

“But you were old enough to face Quirrell and Voldemort when you were his age?” she asked as she raised her eyebrow.

“W… Well that was different,” he shouted.

“Harry,” she said in a gentle tone, “It’s only the truth. Doesn’t our son deserve to know the truth?”

“I guess so,” he said with a note defeat in his voice, “I’m sorry Kali, for everything.”

“Harry, don’t let the pain and bitterness of losing me make you hate me and don’t blame yourself. It was my fault not yours. And it is good to see that even death hasn’t changed the fact that I am a better arguer than you,” Kali said lightly as she smiled, but then she flickered. She brought her hands up to her face and stared at he dissipating form.

“What’s happening?” Harry said as she began to fade.

“I have to leave now. My time is up,” she said, “I love you Potter. You were my silver lining.”

“I love you too Lupin. You were the best thing that ever happened to me,” he said as he kissed her as she lost her solidity.

“Goodbye Harry and remember… always,” she said as she faded from sight.

~End Dream~

He sat straight up in bed. His skin was bathed in sweat and his clothes clung to him.

“It was just a dream, nothing more,” he muttered as he ran his hand over his messy, damp hair. He lay back down and stared at Kali’s side of the bed. He reached over and grabbed the object and thought to himself as he examined it, *I guess love can surpass any barriers. Even death.* He placed the sterling rose on his bedside table beside a wizard photo of a smiling Kali holding Thomas before her death. “And forever, Kali,” he whispered as he fell into a peaceful slumber, or so he thought. He had his eyes closed for only a moment when he heard the tapping noise. He looked toward the window and saw a dark, blurry shape. He reached toward his nightstand and put on his trademark thin round-rimmed glasses. “Bandit? What are you doing here?” he asked as he got out of bed and opened the window. The owl flew in and circled the room before deciding that the dresser was the best landing spot. Harry reached out toward the owl’s outstretched leg, which held a letter. After retrieving it and sending Bandit on his way, he read the letter. He must have read it a hundred times before he put it down. He ran his fingers through his messy black hair and sighed “Nice warning Kali. You gave me a whole thirty seconds of prep time,” he said as he gently place the letter in his nightstand drawer and went back to sleep.

First Year Boys’ Dorm

~Dream~

“Do you like being called Thomas or Tom?” asked a familiar voice. The little boy with unruly jet-black hair and deep blue eyes spun around in the cool gray fog to find the source of the voice, but he found none.

“I like being called Thomas,” he answered as he continued searching.

“Why?” it asked again.

“Because, it makes me sound older,” Thomas replied.

“Why are you in such a hurry to grow up?” it asked louder as if it was getting closer. Thomas felt a shiver run down his spine as he tried to think of an answer.

“I… I guess it’s because I want my dad to talk to me like an adult and maybe he’ll finally tell me about my mum,” he answered.

“Well you have the diary now, what do you need him for?” the voice asked again. This time it came in clearer than before and Thomas knew it was a woman’s voice, but it still sounded very familiar.

“The diary will end before she dies and I want to know what happened,” he answered, “Who are you?”

“I wouldn’t expect you to remember me. You were so young,” she answered as she finally materialized behind the boy. She placed her right hand gently on his shoulder. He quickly spun around and looked at the specter in front of him. He took a deep breath and studied her face. He didn’t know how long she’d be here with him but he wanted to remember this moment forever.

“'Allo Mum,” he said softly as lowered his gaze to the floor. She reached out and caressed his cheek and brought his gaze up to her face.

“'Allo Thomas. It’s nice to finally meet you,” Kali smiled. He stared up to the same blue eyes that he had. Thomas hugged her tightly as if she would disappear if he let her go. She ran her long fingers through his uncontrollable hair in an attempt to sooth him. She gently removed herself from his grasp and lowered herself to his eye level and looked at him. “So how do you like the diary?” she asked.

“It’s interesting,” he answered.

“You can say it. You are shocked that I was a Slytherin and you are absolutely disgusted in the fact that I dated Draco Malfoy,” she laughed as she lifted her hand to cover her mouth.

“Well, yes I am. How could you date him? He’s so…” he ranted.

“Arrogant, boastful, sarcastic, mean,” Kali listed while keeping count on her fingers, “Should I go on?” He just stared at her blankly. “He isn’t that bad. He just likes to play the big bad and you’ll find out more about him when you continue reading,” she said. Thomas looked at the ground for a while before speaking again.

“Why did you die?” he asked as he looked back at her face with tears welling up in her eyes.

“I can’t tell you, Thomas. You’ll have to find out everything on your own,” she relied as she wiped a tear from his cheek, “I know it’s hard, but it’s the way it has to be.”

“Why?” he asked.

“It’s just the way it is,” she answered, “I know that you’ll be able to find the answers to your questions. I believe in you.”

“I love you Mum,” Thomas told her.

“Thomas, I have waited so long to hear that from you,” she said as she drew him into a hug. “I love you too Thomas,” she whispered into his ear. The pulled away from each other as Thomas looked at her in shock as her form began to flicker.

“What’s h... happening Mum?” he asked.

“I have to go now,” she said as she smoothed his hair.

“No! You can’t leave me again,” he shouted. He tried to grab onto her hand, but his just passed right through hers.

“I have to Thomas, even though I don’t want to,” she said before she disappeared completely, “Goodbye Thomas.”

“Bye Mum,” he said as he reached out to where she once was. She was gone again. She had once again left him alone.

~End Dream~

He woke up a start. His chest heaved as he took in sharp intakes of the cool night air. His damp hair clung to his forehead as he closed his eyes and remembered his mother. He opened his eyes and peered down at his blanket. He reached over to his nightstand and retrieved his glasses and put them on. He looked back down to his blanket and picked up the rose. He held it closer to his face and examined it. It was a budding soft lavender sterling rose. He smiled, knowing that it was a gift from his mother. He gently laid the rose on his nightstand along with his glasses before going back to sleep.

Lupin Manor

~Dream~

He stood in the kitchen of his house, but not as it was now. It was the kitchen that Kali, Sirius, and he had while she was in school. It was the same neat yet slightly disorganized kitchen that had once been a place of great happiness. Where everyone sat around eating, laughing and talking. While soaking up his surroundings he heard something. He turned to the kitchen door that lead to the backyard and waited for it. It was a laugh, a cheerful girl’s giggle. He walked to the door and grasped the handle. It was cold, very cold. He shuddered from the icy chill as he turned the handle and opened the door. The garden was immersed in cool mist. The laugh sounded again. He turned his head and looked towards the direction from which it came. It was coming from the old broken gazebo. He had forgotten what it had looked like before Kali had made it her mission to fix up the garden area. He felt his pocket for his wand, but couldn’t find it. He silently swore as he inched closer to the darkened gazebo. He was nearly there when the giggling stopped. Fearing that he had been discovered, he froze on the spot and waited for whatever was going to happen.

“You know, you are very funny when you are trying to sneak up on someone,” the voice laughed, “Dad.” Confused, Remus Lupin climbed the broken steps of the shabby gazebo. As he entered the shadowed area, the mist suddenly began to glow faintly and lit up the gazebo. He tired pale blue eyes opened wide in shock as he breathing came in shallow gasps. He looked at the young woman dressed in well-worn sky blue pajamas with fluffy white clouds. She sat on a bench with her knees drawn up to her chest and her arms hugging them close. “Thank you for telling Tom about me. It made him very happy,” she said.

“I was only doing what was right,” he said as he continued to stare at the apparition in front of him, “Why are you here Kali?”

“I am here to thank you. Are you not happy to see me after all this time?” she inquired as she let her feet touch the dusty floor.

“No, I am very happy to see you, but you’re dead and you just can’t visit me in my dreams without a reason,” he answered.

“You are very right,” Kali smiled, “I do have a reason for being here besides thanking you. Thomas has found the diary I left before I went to the duel and soon he will know things that even Harry doesn’t know. Please help him. He will find out things that might shatter his image of what I was like and he may need someone to confide in.”

“Of course I‘ll be there for him. He is my favorite grandson after all,” Remus responded.

“He is your only grandson, Dad,” she laughed. She walked closer to him and hugged him tightly. “I miss you Daddy and I will always love you,” she cried onto his shoulder as he tenderly stroked her hair.

“I love you too, Kali,” he said as tears began to run down his cheeks, “And I promise that I’ll always be there for Thomas and Harry.” She stepped away from him as she began to flicker.

“Thank you Dad,” she said as she wiped the tears from her eyes, “I have to go back now.”

“I know,” he said and as he kissed her on the forehead, she disappeared and he was alone in the broken down gazebo.

~End Dream~

He did not wake up. He just continued sleeping, only now he had a smile on his face.