Harry Potter and the Adventure He Affectionately Calls Life

"We have to what?" Lana demanded as she stood between platforms 9 and 10 at the Kings Cross train station.

"Run at top speed through the very solid looking barrier. Not only that, but we have to do it in such a way that muggles don't suspect anything," Ron said simply, as if he were suggesting they go for a jog.

"Oh. My. God. Aunt Molly, you can't be serious! It looks so... solid."

"I wonder why," George muttered.

"Fred!" Mrs. Weasley chided.

"Yes?" both twins answered in unison.

"Why are both of you answering?"

"Simple, mum. Fred here was upset that everyone said 'Fred and George' instead of 'George and Fred,' so we switched names. It was a small mistake that I responded to Fred."

Mrs. Weasley did not look amused. "Who's birth name is Fred?"

"Mine."

"Very well then. You are Fred." She turned to her other son. "And you are George."

"Nice job, Aunt Molly!" Harry, Ron, and Hermione nodded in agreement.

The twins, however, did not look so happy. "You never let us have any fun!"

"We've been through this already," Ginny said. She looked at the clock. "Let's go!" She pushed her cart and ran into.

Lana winced. "I'll go next." She turned to Harry for reassurance.

"You can do this. I know you can." Harry reached out and squeezed her hands. "Save us a box car. You, me, Hermione, and Ron."

Lana nodded. "Bye, Aunt Molly! Bye, Uncle Arthur!" She gave them both a kiss on the cheek. With a deep sigh, she followed Ginny.

"Alright, George, Fred, you're next."

"Herm-erm, you finally called me first!" George faked a sob. "See ya' at Hogwarts!" He ran off, Fred right behind him.

"I'll go," Harry volunteered. "Bye, Mrs. Weasley! Bye, Mr. Weasley! Thank's for letting me stay the summer. Again." He gave them both a hug. "See you two in a few minutes." He ran threw the barrier and met up with Lana in the cart.

"We're missing two people."

"They're coming."

Lana smiled nervously. "So we're finally on our way to Hogwarts, huh? This is soooo cool!"

Ron came in first. "Hi people."

Hermione followed in a minute later. "We're off!" She squealed excitedly again. "Finally!"

They settled down in their seats, Hermione pulling out a copy of Hogwarts: A History out of her robes. Harry, who was seated next to her, stared at her in fascination, wondering how she could read the same book so many times. The four of them watched the city roll by as the Hogwarts Express picked up speed. A comfortable silence filled the cart, and Harry found himself in a half asleep state of mind. Across him, Lana and Ron talked in hushed whispers.

Ron stood up a minute later. "I'm going to go check on Ginny."

"Check on the twins while you're at it," Lana told him.

Hermione giggled.

Harry moved over and sat down next to Lana. "How you feeling?" he asked softly.

She shrugged. "I'm okay. Nervous to the point of no return, but I'm okay." She grinned.

The comfort of the cart was ruined when the door slid open. "There you are, Lana! I was looking for you!" Draco let himself in and sat down next to Hermione. "Reading that book again, Hermione?" he asked nastily. Shaking his head, he looked back at Lana. "Why don't you come sit with me. I'll introduce you to some friends."

"Thanks," she said. "But I'm sitting with Ron and his friends now."

"Where is Ron, anyway?"

"Checking on Ginny."

"What's wrong with Ginny?"

"She's sick."

"Oh. Well, until he comes back, why don't you come with me?"

"Thanks, Draco. Maybe later?"

Draco looked at Harry and Hermione in distaste. He wrinkled his nose. "Sure. If you need an escort, just call me. I'll personally come and pick you up."

"That's okay. Thanks."

"Your loss," Draco said, standing up. "Hermione, put the book down. You're not fooling anyone." He let himself out, sliding the door shut just so Ron had to re-open it on his way back in.

"Actually," Harry said. "You should have gone. For the plan, you know." He smiled sadly. The thought of having to share Lana with someone as undeserving as Malfoy made his stomach hurt.

"Later."

___________________________________________________________________

True to her word, Lana ventured into Draco's cabin later.

"Lovely Lana!" Draco sounded genuinely pleased to see her.

"Please don't call me that. It's so... tacky."

"I'm sorry. What should I call you then?"

Lana pretended to consider this. "My name. Lana. Just Lana."

Draco nodded. "Please. Sit down."

She sat.

"Lana, this is Crabbe."

Crabbe grunted some sort of hello, looking at her with interest.

"And Goyle."

He grunted the same way Crabbe did, looking at her in the same way.

"Hi, Crabbe and Goyle. And, of course, Draco." She forced a smile. She looked over at the window. "Hey, you guys have got a great view! Draco, do you mind switching seats?"

"Of course not. Here." He patted his lap.

Ew. Ew, ew, ew. "I'll just sit here," she said, resuming her seat and turning her neck. The view here was obstructed. She had gotten on the train early to ensure a cabin with a good view. She turned her head in the direction that Harry, Ron, and Hermione were sitting.

"What are you looking at?" he asked.

"A bird," she said lamely.

Draco raised an eyebrow. "So, Lana, I've never seen you before," he said, slinging an arm around her shoulder. "Yet you're in our year."

"Oh. Yeah. I went to school in America, and it really wasn't that good. So I transfered to Hogwarts. I'll be taking some younger-level classes and some classes with Harry, Ron and Hermione."

Draco nodded. "I see." He pulled her closer to him.

Too close, she thought. "I really have to get back. Ron." She smiled apologetically. At least, she hoped it was an apologetic smile. "I'll see you at Hogwarts."

"I'll walk you back to your cabin."

"That's okay. I'll make it." Before he could object, she left.

"...And he told me sit on his lap!" Lana retold her story to Ron, Hermione, and Harry.

"Ew!" Hermione said. "That's horrible!"

"Did you?" Ron asked with interest.

"No! Ron, that's gross!"

Ron looked relieved. "Good, otherwise we would have had to have you sanitized."

"You should talk," she muttered, rolling her eyes at her cousin, who had the melted remains of a chocolate frog all over his face and hands.

Harry chuckled. He leaned back in his seat, an amused smile on his face. "Well, I'm glad you're back," he said softly.

Lana smiled, not saying anything. She looked out of the window at the hills rolling past. The sun was starting to set, painting the sky a beautiful rainbow. Hermione had the other window seat, and Lana noticed that Ron was right. Hermione's hair shone a gorgeous red-and-brown. Suddenly, she shrieked with delight. "We're here! We're here! We're here!" She squealed, bouncing in her seat. "Oh my God, I can't believe it!" She leaned back against Harry, who casually put his arm around her.

"You know what's funny?" Harry started. "You and Ron don't look anything alike. If I was to meet you in Diagon Alley that day, I never would have suspected that you were Ron's cousin."

"Distant cousins," Ron explained. "Draco and I are related by--"

Lana shrieked again, this time in disgust. "I'm related to him?" She shook her head. "I don't know if this is good news or not. I don't have to pretend to be interested in him because he's family. That's good. But he's family. That's bad. Very bad."

Ron glared at his cousin. "Draco and I are related from one side. Lana, you and I are related from the other. Hence there is no blood between you and Draco. Which means that if you were to become the next Mrs. Malfoy..."

"Shut up."

"Right."

Hermione laughed. She laughed so hard that she clutched her stomach.

"Hermione, what on earth is so funny?" Harry had never seen Ron looked so confused.

Hermione shook her head and shrugged her shoulders, but continued to laugh. Tears streamed down her eyes. "It hurts," she said, pointing to her stomach, but continued to laugh. "Ron. Lana." She laughed some more. "Oh God. So funny."

"You lost me," Lana said. "I'm completely lost."

"Same." Ron responded.

As randomly as it had started, Hermione's laughter stopped. She donned a serious look on her face. "We're here."

"Oh my God, I'm so nervous!" Lana said.

"Don't be," Harry reassured her. "You'll be fine."

Professor Dumbledore himself was there to greet them as they got off the Hogwarts Express. "Miss Granger," he said, nodding in acknowledgement. "Mr. Weasley and Mr. Potter, joint at the hip as usual." His eyes laughed. "And Miss Weasley. Welcome to Hogwarts. If you will come this way, we'll sort you into your house separately, before the first-years get sorted." He led her in a direction. "And yes, Miss Weasley, your friends may accompany you."

Lana was shocked. "How did he know I was going to ask?"

"He's Dumbledore," Harry said, as if that explained it all. "He knows everything." Then, more to himself than to Lana, he murmured, "and I do mean everything."

___________________________________________________________________

Lana followed nervously behind Professor Dumbledore, looking around to admire the castle. Harry, Hermione, and Ron walked through casually.

"Lemon drop!" the headmaster said when they reached his secret room.

"The password hasn't changed since the last time I was in here," muttered Harry to Ron.

"That, Mr. Potter," Professor Dumbledore said, grinning. "Is because it only works on certified personal. You could stand here and recite the password until your throat is sore, and you would not have gained access into my rooms."

The man really does know everything! Harry thought in amazement as he walked up the spiral staircase into the private library. Fawkes sat on his perch in the room.

"Is that the phoenix, Harry?" Lana asked. "The one whose feather is in your wand."

Harry nodded.

"Ooh!" She stroked the feathers atop the birds head. "He's beautiful, sir."

"Thank you, Miss Weasley. Now, if all four of you will kindly follow me, we will sort our new student. Then she will remain here and I will introduce her to our staff, except Hagrid, of course."

Lana looked confused.

"We'll tell you later," Hermione said.

"I'm sure Miss Granger will help to fill you in on all the details. Lana will take her placement exams and then join you for the feast in the Great Hall."

"Uh... Professor," Ron asked timidly. "Placement exams?"

"So that the other professors will know what level Lana is at," Hermione explained.

Ron nodded knowingly.

"Whenever you're ready," Dumbledore said. "The hat will sort you."

"Uh... could I have a minute, please?"

"Certainly." He returned to his bird and taking him upstairs.

"What do I have to do?" Lana asked, looking at the hat.

"Put it on."

"And then what?"

Even Hermione had to think a minute before answering. "Just put it on. The Sorting Hat will read your mind and tell you what house you belong in."

"No troll-wrestling?"

"What nonsense! Where did you hear that?"

"George and Fred." Lana grinned.

"That's what they told me, too," Ron said, laughing. "Why do you listen to them?"

Lana shrugged, embarrassed. "Good for their self-esteem," she joked, causing everyone to laugh.

"Well, Miss Weasley," Dumbledore said, seeming to appear out of nowhere. "I will take your two friends and your cousin, and you will be sorted." He held up a hand. "The Sorting Hat needs you to be completely focused. Harry, Hermione, and Ronald will be in the next room."

Without a word, the three filed out of the room, Dumbledore closing the door behind them.

Hermione sighed happily. "This year is going to be different. I can feel it. Four of us instead of three. And I'm going to try and take the twin's advice this year."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "Fred and George gave you advice, and you're actually going to take it seriously?" he asked incredulously.

"They told me not to be so serious. Which would explain my behavior on the train. They gave me one of their sweets. Something to make me find the little things funny or something."

"You tried one of their candies?" Ron demanded. "What's wrong with you?!"

"Hermione, we love you the way you are. One of us needs to keep a level head." Harry put a hand on her shoulder. "That's your job." He lifted his hand and poked her square on the nose. "Okay?"

"Of course. That candy was supposed to last until tomorrow morning. But as soon as I saw the castle, I just..."

"Welcome back, Hermione," Ron said, grinning.

Hermione was just about to answer when the door opened. Lana walked out slowly, looking down.

"Well?" Harry demanded. "Gryffindor, right?"

"Just like all the other Weasley's," Ron stated.

"Except me." Lana still refused to look anyone in the eye.

"Not Gryffindor?"

Lana said nothing.

"Then?" Hermione asked. "Which house?"

Lana answered in a voice so tiny, Ron thought he had imagined it.

"SLYTHERIN?!" he repeated.

Lana looked up. She reached over and hugged her cousin. "Ronald, darling, you are the most gullible man on the planet. Yes, Hermione, just like all the other Weasley's. Gryffindor, here I come!"

Harry sighed with relief. "Don't ever do that again!" he ordered, starting to laugh.

"Anyway, I just wanted to come out and tell you guys myself." She did a little jig. "I've got to meet the teachers and take my tests, and then I'll see you guys at dinner."

"Just one request," Dumbledore said lightly. "None of the other students are here yet. All the teachers are waiting in my office, including Filch."

Ron's eyes danced.

"Technically, you have the entire castles to yourselves. Your new password to your house is centaur. I trust you three can keep yourselves out of trouble?"

"I'll take care of it, Professor," Hermione said, standing tall.

"Then I will see you three in the Great Hall later." He nodded to show that he was done talking.

___________________________________________________________________

"Password, please?" the Fat Lady in the picture asked.

"Centaur" all three of them said in unison.

The picture swung open. "Welcome back. You're all early."

"Professor Dumbledore picked us up from the train station because my cousin Lana is transferring to Hogwarts, too, and she needed to be sorted and take her placement exams and meet the faculty and what not. So we three have nothing to do."

The Fat Lady's painted eyebrows raised. "In the greatest castle in the world, you have nothing to do?"

Harry nodded.

"Is the library opened yet?" Hermione wanted to know.

"It is, but there is no one there to guide you."

"That's right. Lana has to meet the entire faculty."

"Even Snape," Ron chimed in.

"I cannot believe your brothers wrote what they did about him!"

"What did they write?" the Fat Lady wanted to know.

"That Snape was an evil, no-good, son-of-a-bitch potions professor," Hermione tattle-told.

The Fat Lady nodded. "Very true, very true." Then, upon seeing the three shocked faces, she amended herself. "I mean, that's horrible. Not true at all."

Harry and Ron burst into fits of laughter.

"What's funny?"

Harry and Ron whirled around. "Nothing, Peeves," Ron said, a hint of annoyance in his voice. "Now go away."

"There are three to many people in this castle." Peeves rubbed is transparent hands together in glee. "Points shall be taken away from Gryffindor house before the term has even started!"

"Yes, Peeves," Hermione said. "Go find McGonagall so she can take away points."

"Yes, yes! And for once I won't be the bad guy! Good-bye, little Gryffindors!"

Hermione stepped inside the portrait and into the Gryffindor common room. Harry followed close behind and stopped to admire the familiar red and gold decor. They must have been very early, for even the warm fire in the fireplace hadn't been lit yet. He sat on the arm chair closest to the fire place and stared into it.

"What's wrong, Harry?" Ron asked, seeing his friend stare into an empty fire-place.

"Sirius." He sighed, then shook his head. "Sorry, guys."

"Don't worry." Hermione pulled a chair close to his, then pulled one for Ron, too. "I've had my share of strange behavior today. And you've had yours. Somewhere between now and midnight, Ron'll have his."

"Right, Hermione, you keep telling yourself that."

They sat that way, silent, but comfortable in each others company until they heard the pitter-patter of footsteps.

"Lana? Dumbledore? McGonagall?" Harry couldn't imagine who else would come so early into the common room.

"No," Hermione said, listening closely. "There's far to many little feet for it to be one of those. Far to many for it to be even all three of them. It sounds like..."

The entrance to the common room flung open and thousands of house-elves walked in, struggling with trunks and animal cages almost triple their sizes.

Hermione's mouth dropped open in shock. She closed it, her expression changing to frustration.

"No!" Ron warned. "Don't say it."

"Hermione, it's okay," Harry tried.

"Hermione, don't. Don't say it," Ron begged.

For just a second, Hermione looked like she was going to explode. "S.P.E.W." She looked at the two boys, groaning in their seats. "And that is all I have to say on that matter."

___________________________________________________________________

The Sorting Hat sang its song. Lana was fascinated. The first years were sorted, and Dumbledore gave his speech. He concluded with, "at the end of the feast, I have a special announcement to make."

Then dinner was served. Just like every year, the feast was amazing. For a while, no one spoke. The only sound was the cutting and chewing and the occasional scrape of metal on the plates.

Little by little, people started talking. Soon the Great Hall was busy with people catching up on the latest gossip. Hugs and kisses were exchanged between old friends.

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, George, and Lana all sat together, joking about teachers.

"So, Hermione," Lana said conversationally at dinner that night. "Where's the gym?"

Hermione laughed. "There is none. Between climbing up all the stairs, you'll be fine."

"And Quidditch, of course."

"You're going to try out for the team?" Ginny asked.

"No, not this year. But I still wanna' play."

"Oh, sure. Yeah, between Quidditch and the stairs, you'll be alright." Hermione patted her flat stomach.

"Harry, Ron told me you were Gryffindor seeker," Lana said in between bites of chicken.

"Yeah. He's the keeper since Wood left."

"Oliver Wood," Lana recited. "Was captain, until he graduated."

"Yeah," George piped in. "Quidditch was his life."

"He was hot," Ginny said dreamily.

"He's to old for you," Ron said immediately, donning the role of the responsible older brother.

Lana laughed along with Harry and Hermione. She took a sip out of her goblet, then looked around. Draco was sitting at the Slytherin table laughing rudely at some joke he had just told. Grabbe and Coyle (Weren't those their names? Lana wondered) laughed along stupidly. Next to her, Harry, Hermione, and Ron were laughing at some joke, but Lana wasn't paying attention. Her eyes were focused on a giant who was talking to Dumbledore. Professor McGonagall caught her eye and gave her a smile. Lana smiled back, then continued starting in awe at the giant.

"Harry," she whispered, shaking his shoulder. "Who is that?"

"Who?"

"The giant talking to Dumbledore."

"Where?" He looked. "Oh! That's Hagrid. He's the ground keeper and the Care of Magical Creatures teacher. Great guy, Hagrid. His heart's almost as big as he is!"

"Oh." She looked back at Hagrid. "So that's Hagrid." She nodded. "Okay. Ron told me he used to go here."

Hermione nodded. She propped an elbow on the table and rested her chin on her palm. "He did, but he got expelled, and they snapped his wand. Everyone thinks he's incompetent except Dumbledore."

"They snapped his wand? What did he so that was so bad?"

"I'll be right back," Ginny announced, getting up from the seat next to Lana. "Bathroom." She shrugged.

Harry shrugged as Ron grinned. "He's got a mischievous side, Hagrid. Almost as bad as yours, cousin dearest. He kept the pieces and Spell-o-taped them together. He carries around a pink umbrella, and we're convinced that the remains of his wand are in it."

Lana's eyes widened. "Awesome!" she exclaimed, high-fiving her cousin.

"What's awesome?" Draco asked, sitting down in the now-empty seat next to Lana.

Ron and Harry rolled their eyes.

"The view," Lana said smoothly.

Draco strained his neck so he could see in the same direction Lana was. "But you can't see me from here," he pointed out.

"That's why," Ron muttered, loudly enough for Draco to hear.

"But then again, you can't see Weasley from here, either, so I guess the view is good."

"Ron's my cousin. We've been writing to each other since we were four. He's practically my best friend."

Draco raised an eyebrow. "Another minor flaw I'll overlook," he said with a wave of his hand.

Lana was furious. "He's my cousin and my friend, Draco. If you can't accept that, then I have nothing more to say to you except you're sitting in Ginny's seat!"

"Feisty!" Draco commented. "But I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get you upset." He looked anything but upset. "Why don't you join me at my table. I'll introduce you to some friends."

"Sorry. I really think I should get to know some of the people in my own house first."

"Potter. Granger. I trust you know Weasley." He pointed to each as he said their name. "Longbottom. Finnigan. Weasley seniors."

"Well," Lana said sarcastically. "Now that I know their last names..." She shook her head. "Some other time, Draco."

"You're in my seat," Ginny announced.

"I was just leaving." He stood up. "Weasley junior," he said as he left.

"Weasley junior?" Ginny asked, confused. "I don't get it."

"Draco was introducing me to some Gryffindors. Thought it would be funny to introduce me to you." She rolled her eyes. "That wasn't funny at all." She dug into the warm blue-berry pie. "This is delicious."

Hermione nodded weakly, poking her fork around the plate. Lana noticed that she hadn't eaten much.

Harry, noticing Lana's interest in Hermione's lack of an appetite and knowing what would come if conversation struck, asked, "so what's your opinion on Snape?"

Lana took another bite of pie, savoring the taste. "Honestly? He doesn't seem like a bad guy. Sure, he needs a tan and a hair-cut pretty desperately, but other than that, I should be okay."

"How did the exams go?" Ron asked.

"Oh!" Lana took a sip of her drink. "Pretty good. Transfiguration was a joke. I'm going to be in your class for that. Actually, I'm in all of your classes except two."

"Which ones?"

"Divination and History of Magic."

"We have those back-to-back," Ron said.

"I know. Me too, except when you're in one, I'm in the other."

"Divination." Harry groaned. "Another year of Professor Trelawney finding another way for me to die."

"I say we go all out this year," Ron said, a wicked gleam in his eye. "Make up the absolute worst ways to die."

"Like what?"

"Like having someone slit open your stomach. Then they pull your insides out by reeling them like a fishing rod."

Ron looked at Hermione in shock. "Ouch." He looked down at his stomach.

Lana, on the other hand, looked over-joyed. "The woman has seen the classics of the scary-movie world!" She high-fived Hermione, who grinned.

"Of course," she assured her friends, "I won't do that. But you guys might want to try writing that and see what Professor Trelawney says."

"Right..." Ron said, rolling his eyes. "Of course Perfect Hermione would never do anything to upset the teachers."

"Speaking of teachers," Harry said thoughtfully. "I wonder what Dumbledore has to tell us."

As if he had heard them, the headmaster stood up. He didn't make a sound, but everyone stopped talking immediately. "Welcome back," he said. "I trust now that you are all well-eaten, you are ready for my announcement."

There was a murmur of agreement from the students and teachers.

"It's been a while since we've had someone who can maintain the job of the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor for more than a year."

"That job's cursed!" Ron whispered to Lana.

"Indeed," Dumbledore continued. "There are some who think that the job might even be cursed." He looked directly at Ron and winked. "The good news is that I have found someone to fill in the job. For this year, anyway."

The students and teachers laughed.

"The bad news is that your new teacher won't arrive for another two weeks."

Another round of excited murmurs.

"My first idea was to not have any Dark Arts classes until your new teacher arrived at our castle. But then, we can't have you running around the castle, now can we?"

The students groaned.

"So for the next two weeks, you are looking at your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher."

Harry, Ron, and Hermione burst into an excited chatter.

"This is great!" Ron said.

Harry nodded.

"Thank you. That is all," Dumbledore said, sitting down.

"What happened to the teachers?" Lana wanted to know. "Why is it cursed?"

"Where do we start?!" Ron asked.

"First there was Quirell..." Harry started in a scary-stories-around-the-campfire voice.

"Fucking asshole turned out to be Voldemort," Lana finished. "Ron told me."

"Yeah..."

"Then there was Lockhart," Hermione sighed dreamily. Ron and Harry gave each other a "Look."

"But he was an impostor who didn't really know anything. And he accompanied you to the Chamber of Secrets, but he was of no help whatsoever."

Harry continued listing the teachers. "...And last year was Umbridge."

Ron groaned. "Harry, don't mention that woman's name in my presence ever again."

Hermione nodded in agreement.

"Why?" Lana wanted to know. "What did she do?"

"What didn't she do," Hermione responded, rolling her eyes. She cancelled Quidditch, ignored Dumbledore altogether. She made Hogwarts a horrible place."

Harry coughed delicately, sending the Weasley twins into fits of laughter. He grinned.

"I don't get it." Lana stared at Harry and the twins.

"That's how Umbridge used to get people's attention," Fred said.

"Do it again, Harry," George demanded.

He did. "I never told you guys this, but I hated Hogwarts under her rule..." He drifted off, trying to figure how to express his words. "I actually wished... I actually..." He sighed.

"What?" the twins demanded in unison. "What?!"

Harry dropped is voice to a whisper. "That I was back at the Dursleys."

Hermione gasped. "No!"

"Damn, Harry," Lana said, shaking her head in amazement. "How bad could it be?"

"Bad," Harry said, laughing the this-is-not-funny laugh. "Very bad." He sighed. "But it's done now. And Dumbledore's our teacher."

"Temporarily," Hermione reminded them.

"Ah, shut up, Herm-erm," George said. "Let Harry have two weeks of fun."

"Who do you think it is?" Lana asked.

"No clue," Ginny replied. "No clue at all."

___________________________________________________________________

The last thing Lana saw when she went to sleep that night was Hermione unpacking. Her brain was to tired to comprehend the fact that the house-elves did it for her.

The first thing Lana thought when she woke up the next morning was, I'm dead. I've died and gone to heaven. Either that, or I have to be dreaming. It sucks because I'm going to wake up, and the whole past 24 hours will be fake. That amazing meal. They don't make beds this comfortable in reality. Even with Draco, the dream was amazing. Her eyes opened to the red velvet canopy of the bed. Lana pinched herself, surprised to find that it hurt. It's real!

"Hermione!" she exclaimed to the sleeping girl on the bed next to hers. "Wake up!"

"Two more minutes, mom," Hermione muttered before drawing the covers over her head.

Lana watched her with an amused smile on her face. With a sigh, she got up and went into the bathrooms. The showers turned on automatically. The water was heated to a temperature perfect for her skin. Scented with tangerine for energy, this was a shower she could get used to! Lana was almost upset to have it end. Reluctantly, she stepped out and dressed.

Lana was shocked to see Hermione up, showered, and ready. She was leaning into a mirror, applying lip gloss. "First shower, huh?" she smiled knowingly. "Evening showers are great, too. Lavender scented. Relaxation."

"Nice!" Lana exclaimed, leaning in to apply her own lip gloss and brush out her hair.

Hermione had finished making herself up by now, and she had started to make her bed.

"I thought you didn't have to make your own bed."

"The house-elves do it. They're treated so horribly," Hermione said sadly. "I wish more of them would be like Dobby."

"Dobby, the house-elf who insisted on wearing clothes and getting paid for it?"

"Yeah. So I started the Society for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare."

Lana stared at her blankly.

"S.P.E.W.?"

"Oh! Spew!"

"Right," Hermione said, slightly deflated. "Anyway, I tried to make the elves see how badly their being treated, but they refuse to listen!"

"Hermione, I'll join you in your crusade to make their lives better."

Hermione was ecstatic. She got out a S.P.E.W. pin. Lana nodded solemnly as it was pinned to her robes.

"I'll take one, too," Ginny said.

Hermione was happy to oblige.

"Didn't mean to eavesdrop. I was looking for Lana. It's Dean again."

"Dean Thomas... your boyfriend." Lana plopped down on Hermione's bed. "What's up?"

"He's so clingy! I just want him to leave me alone."

"Did you take my advice? You wrote to him over the summer, right?"

Ginny blushed. "Not exactly..."

"Then you have no one to blame but yourself. I told you this would happen. I told you!"

Hermione shook her head. "Let's go, guys, I'm starving."