Harry Potter and the Crystalline Darkness

Chapter 2

"Sirius! I'm fine! Will you stop hovering over me!" Harry glared at his godfather then stalked out of the library leaving a stunned and hurt Sirius behind him.

Sirius turned and looked at Remus, who had been a reluctant observer to the outburst. "What? Moony, what did I do?" the animagus asked in bewilderment.

Remus sighed. He had to admit Harry had a point. Now that things had settled down, Sirius was getting a little overwhelming. The werewolf knew it was mostly due to the fact that his friend had missed so many years and in some ways blamed himself for everything that had happened to Harry.

"You are smothering him a bit, Padfoot," Remus said slowly. "He's not a child anymore. He's sixteen, nearly seventeen. He's almost of age. And I know he's blind but I think if the events of the last couple of months have proven anything, it's that Harry's anything but incapable of handling things on his own."

"But...but..." Sirius sputtered, a little bit of anger growing in his eyes.

"I know you love him but you've got to take a step or two back, Sirius," Remus continued. "You're hanging on too hard, like you're afraid he's going to disappear if you let go. He loves you, he's not going anywhere."

Sirius looked angry for a moment and then deflated suddenly. He slumped down into Harry's abandoned chair and sighed.

"I...Merlin! I...you're right. It's just...I missed so much, Moony!" The look on Sirius' face was anguished. "I should have been there! If I could go back and change anything, going after Peter like that would be it. Harry should have grown up with me...and with you. I was so damn stupid." He buried his face in his hands.

Remus looked at his oldest friend with sorrow and compassion. He dragged his chair over and sat down next to Sirius, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"What's done is done, Padfoot old friend, and it cannot be undone," the werewolf said sadly. "Might as well say that you shouldn't have trusted Peter. We all trusted him you know. Who'd have thought Peter of all people would have betrayed us. He idolized James and he frankly adored Lily."

Sirius drew in a breath and his shoulders began to shake. Remus threw an arm around his friend's shoulders and wasn't surprised when Sirius suddenly buried his face in his shoulder and wept. Remus was fairly sure this was the first time since Sirius had escaped from Azkaban that he had been able to fully comprehend what had happened on that awful night so many years ago. Remus himself had had plenty of time over the years to accept what had happened even if he had not known the whole truth but Sirius had first been surrounded by Dementors then had had his attention on staying free, finding Peter, protecting his godson and helping the Order. Even the time spent at Grimmauld Place a year or so ago hadn't been relaxing. Partly because coming back to the house had brought back so many unpleasant memories but also because of the ever-present threat to Harry.

As Remus silently held his best friend as he wept, his werewolf-enhanced hearing picked up a small sound from the doorway. He looked up to find Harry standing there, a look of stunned surprise on his face. He waved his free hand to attract the young man's attention and then used one of the Battle Guard hand signals Harry had taught him. The one for 'later'. Harry's gaze moved to his still-weeping godfather then he looked back at Remus and nodded before silently leaving the doorway. Remus watched him go and then turned his attention back to Sirius.

It took a long time for Sirius' weeping to tail off but Remus waited patiently. When the animagus finally lifted his head, Remus winced a little at the red-rimmed eyes that looked at him. Remus transfigured a piece of parchment into a handkerchief and handed it to Sirius.

"Feel any better?" he asked as Sirius scrubbed his face.

Sirius shrugged then shook his head. "Not really," he said a little hoarsely.

Remus chuckled softly. "Well, I expect you will eventually. It'll take time though." He patted Sirius on the shoulder. "Now, I suggest you go and wash your face while I go and talk to Harry."

Sirius started and then stood suddenly. "No, look I'll talk to him..."

"No, Padfoot," Remus said firmly. "Go and wash your face and...I don't know, work on your motorbike or something." He gave Sirius a small push and a significant look.

Sirius stood, looking uncertain for a moment then nodded. "Okay," he said quietly and walked out of the library. Remus watched him go. He ran a hand through his graying hair and went to look for Harry.

He found the young man sitting nervously in his room. Harry started to his feet when Remus walked in.

"Remus! What's going on? Why was Sirius crying?" he asked urgently.

Remus walked over and encouraged Harry to sit. "Harry, calm down. It's okay. Sirius is fine."

"He didn't look fine when I walked back into the library," Harry said stubbornly then his face blanched. "Was...was it what I said? I...Remus, I didn't mean to hurt him. I love Sirius but...but he's always there!"

Remus placed a calming hand on Harry's arm. "Calm down," he repeated. "No, it wasn't what you said...or at least, not really. I know Sirius has been a little...well, overwhelming lately. He doesn't mean to, Harry, it's just that he's a little...insecure at the moment. He adored you as a baby; I was always kidding James and Lily that you're first word was just as likely to be Siri or whatever you could manage of Padfoot instead of Mum or Dad. He even loved you more than that motor bike of his!"

Remus laughed and Harry joined in, albeit a little reluctantly. Then Remus became a little pensive.

"You know, that was one of the reasons I believed that Sirius had betrayed James and Lily all those years ago."

"What?" Harry said a little blankly. "The motor bike?"

"Yes! He wouldn't even let James ride his beloved bike; I couldn't imagine why he would suddenly give it to Hagrid unless he was trying to cut his ties with us or something like that." Remus smiled sadly. "In retrospect, I can see it was because of you. Hagrid must have said that Dumbledore wanted you kept safe. Sirius would have done anything to keep you safe, even give up his motor bike to get you to wherever Dumbledore wanted you."

Harry was silent for a while as he thought about this then he grimaced. "He thinks he's going to lose me again, doesn't he?"

"Yes," Remus replied. "That's why he's holding on so tight to you...and to me."

"But I'm not going anywhere," Harry said slightly baffled.

"So tell him that." Remus grinned. "The two of you are more alike than you realize. You both don't tell people things they need to know. Even things as simple as the fact that you care."

Harry grinned ruefully. "That was part of the deal, wasn't it? Telling people things."

"Well," Remus temporized. "It was part of the deal you made with me. Maybe you need to make the same deal with Sirius."

"Yeah, I guess I do," Harry said then something occurred to him. "Siri?" he said with a small grin.

Remus gave a choked laugh. "He decided you should call him that. He though it would be easier to say than Sirius or Padfoot. He was always encouraging you to say it before you started talking." Remus laughed. "He was always so thrilled when you actually called him that after you started talking."

Harry smiled. "What did he encourage me to call you?" he asked with a mischievous look. When Remus hesitated, Harry grinned. "You know I'll just ask Sirius anyway. He'll tell me."

"He would too, the bugger," Remus groaned. "Remy. He got you calling me Remy."

"You didn't like it?" Harry asked curiously.

"I...I..." Remus gave a wry grin. "No, I did like it actually."

"You just liked playing the sensible curmudgeon." Harry grinned.

"Well, someone had to do it!" Remus laughed then waved a hand at Harry. "Now, go on. Go and talk to Sirius. He should be down in the basement working on his bike."

Harry grinned and headed out of the room. Just as he was disappearing through the door his voice floated back to his guardian. "Okay, Remy!"

*****************************************

Harry slowly made his way down the stairs to the basement. He could hear the muted sounds of Sirius working on the motor bike. He slowed even further as he got to the door at the bottom of the stairs and carefully opened it. Sirius was seated on the floor in front of the large black bike, his back to the door, and was rather vigorously unscrewing something. Harry watched for a moment and then walked into the room.

"Hey, Siri," he said quietly.

Sirius froze at the greeting and then carefully put the spanner he was holding down before looking around with wide eyes.

Wh...what did you call me?" he asked in surprise.

Harry smiled uncertainly. "I called you Siri."

Tears welled in Sirius' eyes and he swallowed hard. Then he broke out into the biggest smile Harry had ever seen and leapt up, dragging Harry into a heartfelt embrace.

"You haven't called me that since...since before..." Sirius' voice was choked with emotion. "I didn't think you remembered..."

"I didn't," Harry said a little reluctantly. "Remy told me."

Sirius released Harry and placed his hands on his godson's shoulders. "Remy?" he chuckled a little weakly. "You got that out of him too?" He sighed. "Harry, I'm sorry. I guess I've been smothering you a bit lately, haven't I? I...I don't mean to. It's just..." His voice trailed off and he ran a hand through his hair.

"It's okay, Siri," Harry said, smiling at the grin that graced his godfather's face at the pet name. "Remus explained a few things and I kind of understand. I'm not going anywhere, you know. I mean, Voldemort's dead so there's no threat from him and Professor Dumbledore's keeping an eye on Draco. And I don't want to live anywhere unless it's with you and Remy. So it's okay, you can let go a little, I'll be here."

Sirius smiled again and thanked his good fortune in having Remus Lupin as a friend. He was fairly sure he would have bollixed things up with Harry if not for the patience and good sense of the werewolf. He pulled Harry into another hug then let him go.

"So, I guess it's going to be Siri and Remy from now on then?" Sirius said with a wistful smile.

"Yes, I think so," Harry replied with a laugh. "I think after going to so much effort to teach me that those were your names, it would be very silly of me not to use them!"

Sirius laughed and threw an arm around his godson's shoulders. "Nice to see all my hard work isn't going to go to waste. Come on then, let's go tell Remus that everything's okay."

****************************************

The next few weeks passed fairly smoothly. Sirius seemed to relax a bit and both he and Remus enjoyed Harry's new, almost playful air. They particularly enjoyed the fact that he continued to call them by the pet names Sirius had come up with so long ago. Sirius joined Harry every morning before breakfast to work on the things that Master Nhean had taught them. They would then join Remus for breakfast in the now-cheerful kitchen. After breakfast, the three of them would either adjourn to the library to do homework or lesson preparation or they would just relax in the living room and talk about Harry's escapades at school or some of the mischief the Marauders had got up to. Both Sirius and Remus were eager to show Harry that his Dad hadn't always been such a great prat. They were careful to tell as many stories as they could remember of their last year at school; partly because this was when James had really gotten himself under control but also because many of these stories also featured Lily. Harry had eaten these stories up.

They had also gone out a fair bit. Mostly it was just trips to the country for picnics. Trips to the zoo or other such places were a bit useless as Harry couldn't really see much but picnics in isolated places were always great fun. After the food had been eaten, it was inevitable that Padfoot and Blaze would come out to play. Remus often ended up being the bunny in the middle of those two but he never really complained too seriously.

Harry had initially had a few problems at Grimmauld Place. Master Nhean's prediction had come true; his Oversight was greatly restricted away from Hogwarts. Thankfully he now knew Sirius and Remus well enough that their faces were still clear in the overlay he saw but he found the greatly reduced detail in everything else a little disconcerting and it took a week or two to adjust to it.

Another constant in his life now were the almost daily letters from his friends. Ginny's came most often but every one of his Battle Guard sent letters regularly and he even received letters from many of the members of the DA. Despite this he was a little surprised when a handsome brown owl turned up one day about three weeks after school ended with a letter for him from Millicent Bulstrode. He was lounging around in the living room with his godfather and guardian, lazily watching while they played chess. It was always fun watching them because their games always seemed to degenerate into a battle of good-natured insults as well as chess strategy. Harry politely thanked the owl and opened the letter while reaching for the device Hermione had given him for his last birthday. He attached it to the letter and flicked the small switch that activated the spell that kept the speech audible to his ears only then listened while it read what was on the parchment.

Potter,

Yesterday I met with a mutual friend that I share with Pansy Parkinson. Pansy still trusts this friend of mine and she spoke pretty freely to her. Apparently Draco has been in contact with Pansy. He wanted her to meet with him and, as he put it, some interesting friends of his in a week or two. My friend asked her exactly what kind of friends these were and Pansy's reply makes me think that Draco's managed to get what remains of the Death Eaters to follow him. How the little twit managed it, I'll never know but I suppose some people are just born followers. Anyway, I think we now know where Bellatrix Lestrange and Petiigrew probably are.

I thought I'd better let you know about this. What you do with the information is up to you, just try not to get yourself killed.

Enjoy your holidays,

Millicent Bulstrode

His expression had obviously changed while he was listening to the letter because as soon as it finished, Sirius spoke to him.

"Everything alright there, Harry?" he said with concern. "You've got the oddest expression your face. Who's the letter from?"

"It's from Millicent Bulstrode," Harry said absently as he tried to process everything.

"Millicent Bulstrode," Sirius said musingly then snapped his fingers. "Oh yes, Slytherin, in the DA, bull patronus. So, what's she got to say?"

"Erm, she's got a mutual friend with Pansy Parkinson and she thinks that Pansy is up to something with Draco," Harry said slowly. "She also thinks that's where the Death Eaters who escaped probably are. With Draco at Malfoy Manor."

Remus nodded slowly. "I suppose that makes sense, doesn't it? We should probably tell Albus about this."

"Yeah, definitely," Harry said and handed the letter to Remus. "Here, show this to Professor Dumbledore. I think he should know who the information came from as much as the information itself."

Remus quickly glanced at the letter before handing it to Sirius. The black-haired animagus read the letter over before chuckling and handing it back to his friend.

"Try not to get yourself killed," he repeated as he grinned at his godson. "Guess she knows you fairly well."

Harry snorted and rolled his eyes. "Like you can talk, Siri."

Sirius laughed and looked down at the chessboard. "Come on, Moony. We can speak to Dumbledore later. We've got time before this meeting mentioned in the letter. Besides, it's your move."

Remus looked at the letter for a moment longer then placed it carefully on the table beside the couch before turning his attention back to the chessboard.

The next morning when Harry wandered downstairs for his morning exercises, he found Dobby waiting in the first floor room Sirius had set aside for him.

"Hi, Dobby," Harry said cheerfully.

"Hello, Harry Potter Sir," Dobby replied. "Dobby has a message for you from Sirius Black."

"Oh, what is it?"

"Sirius Black says to tell Harry Potter that he and Remus Lupin have gone to Hogwarts this morning to speak to Professor Dumbledore and that he did not know when they would be back." Dobby beamed with pleasure.

Harry grinned at him. "Thanks, Dobby."

The odd little house-elf bowed so low his nose brushed the ground and then he disappeared with a pop. Harry shook his head and leaned his cane against the table that stood in one corner. He moved into the middle of the room and began the first kata he had learnt.

After he finished his exercises, he wandered back upstairs and showered. He dressed and headed back down for breakfast. Afterwards he wandered around for a moment before sighing and heading for his room. He grabbed the last of the assignments he had to finish and headed for the library. He sat down at his usual table in the library, attached his reading device to the parchment and had it read the assignment topic: "There are four different potions that can be used for the purposes of levitation. List all four, their ingredients and brewing methods and discuss the strengths and weaknesses of all four in comparison with each other." Harry sighed, slowly opened his potions textbook and reached for the reading device.

He was still buried in his potions essay when Sirius and Remus came into the library. Harry stopped talking and grabbed the dicta-quill, placing it down on the table. He had accidentally left it in position once and had ruined his Charms essay by recording the entire silly conversation he had had with Sirius and Remus. He looked over at the energy fields that indicated his guardian and godfather.

"Well?"

"Dumbledore said to thank you," Remus said as he collapsed in a chair. Sirius leaned against the wall and shook his head.

"Not that there's much he can do," the animagus said in a resigned tone.

"Why not?" Harry asked indignantly.

"Because if the meeting is to be held at Malfoy Manor then getting a spy in is going to be a little difficult," Remus replied calmly.

"Oh, good point," Harry said with chagrin. "Well, I'd better write back to Millicent and thank her for the information. I need to write to Ginny anyway."

Remus and Sirius nodded and the werewolf stood and stretched.

"We're going to head down to the kitchen," Sirius said. "We missed breakfast and lunch and I could just about eat a hippogriff."

"Better not let Buckbeak hear you say that," Remus said with amusement as the two men walked out of the library.

Harry watched then go and sighed. He couldn't think of anyway to eavesdrop on the meeting either. He shook his head and pulled a sheet of parchment towards him and he picked up his dictaquill.

******************************************

That night Harry fell asleep and began to dream. At first the dreams were simple dreams; dreams of Ginny, of Sirius and Remus, of his friends. But after a while the dreams began to change in their atmosphere and their tenor. In his dreams the scene faded until it became black and there was an odd crystalline resonance to the air.

Harry shifted in his sleep and muttered a negative but the dreams still held him. After a while he became aware that he was not alone in this strange crystalline darkness, there was someone else with him. Harry's dream self turned and looked for this other awareness he had sensed. He wasn't upset or unnerved by the blackness, he had gotten used to living in perpetual dark, but he could sense that the other awareness wasn't quite so sanguine. As he kept looking around, he could feel the other presence becoming panicked and in its panic, the other began to grow angry. Harry tried to call out, to reassure the other but oddly enough, no words would come. He tried to move over to the other, to touch the other, to reassure the other but he soon found that he could not move either. And the other's fear and anger continued to grow.

Harry turned over in his bed and muttered again. On the table in the corner of the room, his Runespoor, Orinda, lifted his three heads and looked at his friend. The snake's three heads hissed in unison and he swayed with indecision. Harry muttered again and his head jerked in his sleep. This seemed to cure Orinda of his hesitancy. The Runespoor slithered to the corner of the table and slowly wound his way down the leg. He slithered across the floor of the room and out of the slightly open door.

In his dream, Harry was beginning to feel the first edges of fear. He could not find any way of reaching the other, either through physical means or through thoughts or emotions. The other was caught in its fear and was beyond anything Harry could do. And now he was finding it increasingly difficult to fend off the waves of fear, of rage, of anger that were rolling off the other. The waves of emotion were buffeting Harry and slowly but surely they were breaking down his shields. When Harry realised this he was filled with alarm, his shields had held through everything that Voldemort had thrown at them but this rage, this anger was eroding them rapidly. Harry tried to pull himself away from the other and out of the crystalline darkness but quickly found that the same force that stopped him from aiding the other was now stopping him from leaving.

Harry's breathing rate began to increase and he started jerking around in his sleep; his body reflecting the urgency of his mind's attempts to escape. All of a sudden he convulsed violently as his shields collapsed and he began to scream. Just as the first scream began, the door to his bedroom was pushed completely open and Sirius barged in, Orinda wrapped around his arm and wrist and Remus hot on his heels. The two men stared at Harry in horror for a moment and then they threw themselves towards the bed. The moment Sirius lay his hand on the bed, Orinda slithered his way off, though Sirius was beyond caring about this. He grabbed his godson by the shoulders and gave him a small shake.

"Harry!" he yelled. "Harry! HARRY!"

His godson jerked around and continued to scream. Sirius looked up at his friend, fear growing in his eyes.

"Remus," he gasped. "Go to Hogwarts. Get Snape."

Remus nodded and left the room at a dead run. Sirius turned back to his godson and watched him with fear-filled eyes.

********************************************

Remus burst out of the floo in the suite he, Harry and Sirius had used during the school year. He stumbled out of the door and pelted down to the dungeon. When he reached the portrait that guarded the Potion Master's private rooms, he began pounding on the frame and yelling. After a few minutes, a very irritated Snape flung the portrait door open.

"What in Merlin's name..." Snape said acidly before Remus cut him off.

"It's Harry!" Remus gasped. "He's caught in something, a dream, a vision, I don't know. We can't get him out of it. Orinda woke Sirius so I think it's more than just a nightmare. He's screaming...like he used to when he got those visions of Voldemort."

Snape's face had gradually lost its irritation as Remus gasped out his explanation and by the end of it the tall, black-haired man was frowning. He stalked back into his bedroom and emerged a couple of minutes later dressed and pulling on his over-robe. He gestured impatiently towards his fireplace and the container of floo powder on the mantle. Remus strode over and grabbed a handful of the powder.

"12 Grimmauld Place," he said and stepped into the green flames. He stepped away from the fireplace in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place and winced as he heard Harry scream again. Snape stepped out shortly afterwards and his head jerked up as he heard the screams. Remus grabbed his arm and began pulling him out of the kitchen.

"Come on, it's up here," the werewolf said in a distracted tone as he led the Potions Master up the stairs to the second floor.

The two men walked into Harry's bedroom to find Sirius sitting on the edge of the bed watching his godson with a frantic air about him. He looked up when he heard them come in.

"Nothing's changed," he said, running a distracted hand through his hair. "Nothing I do seems to get through to him."

Snape walked over to the bed and frowned at the young man writhing and screaming on the bed. He was still for a moment then he shook his head.

"I tried the subtler method of legilimency," he said, "but it does not appear to be working. His shields are gone but I cannot get into his mind." The Potions Master looked around until he found Orinda curled up on the bed.

"Can you take me to Harry like you did before?" he hissed in Parseltongue to the Runespoor.

The snake seemed to consider this for a moment and then went very still. A moment later the snake began to move again. "No, Black Snape," the right head hissed. "We cannot reach our Harry. He ventures somewhere we cannot go."

"Do you know where?" Snape hissed.

"No," Orinda replied. "It is dark and we cannot follow. But we do know he is not alone there."

Snape started and turned back to the two men. "Orinda cannot reach him and cannot take me to him," he said bluntly. "There is nothing I can do."

Sirius' face became bleak and Remus drew in a sharp breath.

Snape looked back at Harry. "I will return to Hogwarts and retrieve some potions," he said. "I think Mr Potter will need them."

The tall black-clad man nodded to Sirius and Remus and swept out of the room. The two men left in the room exchanged glances and settled on either side of Harry's bed.

****************************************************

Wave after wave of pain washed over Harry. He felt like a small twig lost in a flood, being thrown around at will. He desperately grasped at the shreds and tatters of his shield and tried to weave them back together. At first it seemed like a lost cause. He kept getting washed away by the waves of pain-inducing rage and fear coming from the other. But then he slowly, slowly began to make some headway. It was an agonising process; weaving the shield piece by tiny piece but gradually he began to succeed. Finally he managed to complete the process and then began to push the shield at the waves of rage from the other while looking for a way out.

Distantly he could hear someone calling his name. He turned towards the voice and was relieved to find that he could move. He made his way towards the voice as fast as he could and very shortly he was jerking upright in his bed, sweat dripping from his body. He stared blankly into the blackness and gasped. He winced and brought a hand up to his throat; it was sore and he frowned. It was then that he realised that the voice that he had heard in his dream was still speaking to him and there were hands clutching at his shoulders. He shook his head and concentrated on what was going on around him.

"Harry!" It was Sirius talking to him. "Harry! Are you alright?"

"Siri," Harry rasped and broke off in a fit of coughing, his throat reacting badly to the attempt to speak.

"Drink this, Mr Potter," came the silky voice of the Potions Master.

Harry nodded and groped for the vial he knew Snape was offering. There was a small silence around him then he felt the vial being pressed into his hand. He uncorked it and quickly swallowed it down, grimacing at the taste.

"Thank you, sir," he said, his voice still raspy but his throat now behaving.

"Are you alright, Harry?" asked Sirius again.

Harry nodded. "Yeah, Siri. I'm okay. It was just a dream...I think"

"What kind of dream?" Remus asked with concern. "Harry, you were screaming and convulsing."

Harry's mouth dropped open. He hadn't realised his reaction in his dream had spilled over into real life, though he supposed he should have from the state of his throat. He shook his head and answered Remus' question.

"I...I was somewhere black and...kind of, I don't know, crystalline. Then I realised there was someone or something else there with me. I didn't mind the blackness but the other...presence did. It was starting to panic and then it got angry and afraid. It was projecting its rage and fear and it managed to destroy my shields." Harry frowned and shivered. Sirius saw this and moved over next to his godson, drawing him close to try and warm him up. Harry smiled and snuggled closer to his godfather before continuing. "It took me ages to rebuild my shields; I kept getting blown away by the other presence's emotion. When I did I started looking for a way out. I...think I heard you calling me, Siri, and somehow I was able to pull myself out."

"Do you have any idea who the other presence was?" Remus asked as he shifted over slightly and took one of Harry's hands. "And why is your Oversight not working?"

Harry gave Remus' hand a squeeze. "I don't know who it was, Remy, but think about it. A crystalline darkness and rage. Surely it's got to be Voldemort." He grimaced. "Typical. Just when I think I've got it pretty good, life comes and whips the rug out from under my feet."

The three men exchanged concerned and curious glances before Remus looked back at Harry.

"And your Oversight?" the werewolf asked.

"Oh, my head hurts too much and I'm too damn tired to put it back up," Harry said wearily, leaning into Sirius a bit more.

Sirius bit back a curse and reached for the other potions Snape had brought with him. The Potions Master handed him two of the vials.

"Here drink these," Sirius ordered, pressing the vials into Harry's hand one by one and watching him drink them down. "We can talk about this tomorrow when you wake up. We'll have to get Albus to come around for this, I think."

Harry nodded slowly and allowed himself to succumb to the potions.