Something Kinda Funny

Chapter 5: The Beginning

Rick : Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

- Casablanca (1942)

Hermione and Ron had taken the news of my impending fatherhood well - or at least better then could be expected. Ron had had eventually gotten over his shock and mover onto hysterics after which Hermione had gone through my story with a fine-toothed comb and made me re-tell it many times until she was satisfied. And they still didn't know who the other father was which, on the whole, was probably a good thing.

I hummed quietly to myself as I made my way down to the rooms that Malfoy - no, Draco - and I currently inhabited and ran headfirst into Professor McGonagall.

"Harry!" she exclaimed, clasping hands over a wrinkled and, thankfully, very covered bosom, "I've just come from talking to You-Know-Who." This admission seemed to send the First-year that stood by her side into quiet hysterics. She glanced down at the girl and patted her shoulder reassuringly before turning back to me and saying, "I'm just going to tell everyone that you'll be taking a leave of absence from the dorms for the rest of the year. Don't worry though Harry, the full story is yours to tell."

I nodded once and continued on my way to my new rooms. Even if I was currently sharing them with Malfoy they were a hell of a lot nicer then the Gryffindor dorms.

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I felt like my legs were on fire. Stairs are not a good idea when you're pregnant - and I was stuck living in a bloody castle that was practically made of stairs.

Lucky me.

I'd almost made it to the room when Weasel Two (the female one) and Loony Luna rolled up.

Loony gave me a once over and said, "How far along are you?"

Okay, 'freaked out' doesn't even begin to describe how I felt at that particular moment in time. No one and I mean no one was supposed to be able to see through the charm, even Dumbledore couldn't tell unless he looked at me from the corner of his eye! Come on! Loony Luna could see through my disguise? I was so busted.

The Weaselette saved me. "What are you talking about Luna?" she asked stupidly.

Really, how many things are there out there that require the question 'how far along are you'?

Loony turned to her dirt poor friend and smiled enigmatically. "That's between Draco and the father now, isn't it?"

Weasel Two just shrugged and scrunched up her ugly little face in confusion. Now usually, I'd be more then happy to rub her stupidity in her face but at this point in time I really needed to pee and I really wanted to get out of there.

Just my luck then that that was when Potter chose to make his grand entrance.

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I turned the corner on my way to my new quarters and who should I see but Ginny, Luna, and Mal - Draco. Draco had his usual sneer fixed firmly in place, but his eyes had a hint of desperation in them. Luna looked... well, like she always does and Ginny looked confused - hanging out with Luna will do that to you.

I slowed my pace and smiled brightly at Ginny and Luna. "Hey," I said, "what's up?"

Draco gave me a dirty look but didn't say anything disparaging either so I figured we were making progress.

"Hey Harry!" Ginny exclaimed, smiling and latching herself to my arm, "Luna just wanted to talk to Malfoy for a bit." In a not so silent whisper she added, "Why anyone would want to talk to that git is beyond me."

I glanced at Draco who was having a staring contest with the serene Luna and shrugged. "Yeah well, nice seeing you Ginny but I gotta go."

She pouted a bit but released me from her clutches and I couldn't stop a small sigh of relief from escaping my mouth. I'd be one of the first to admit Ginny was gorgeous - flowing auburn hair, just a hint of freckles, warm chocolate eyes, and a body to die for - but she was like my little sister! Not to mention that she was also quite the man eater.

I smiled at Luna and grabbed Draco's arm. "Come on Draco," I said, ignoring Ginny's gasp and Luna's knowing smile, "let's go."

He followed mutely for a bit and I was starting to hope someone'd put a silencing charm on him when he started to speak.

"Fuck Potter," he cursed, ruining the impression of elegance and grace his looks created, "do you know what kind of rumors are going to around the school by tomorrow now?"

I smirked - I've tried raising my eyebrow before but it doesn't really work, my whole forehead kind of get wrinkly and I end up looking rather stupid - and laughed. "And you thought we could keep the fact that we're now sharing a room separate from all the others secret? McGonagall, Snape, and Dumbledore will have some alibi for our current room situations and we can use that as an excuse for everything."

Draco thought about it for a moment before sighing and running a hand through his hair. "Really Potter, how nearly Slytherin of you. You do realize that's not going to stop the rumors."

"Like what?"

"Well for example that I'm a veela you you're my mate."

I snorted.

"Or that we're soul and/or heart bonded."

Again, my response was a snort.

"Or that I'm pregnant with your love child."

The way he said it - looking me in the eye with this bland expression on his face like he was talking about the weather - cracked me up. In the middle of the hallway, talking to Draco Malfoy my supposed 'archrival' I burst into sidesplitting laughter.

And that was how it all started.

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