Like Weasel, Like Ferret

Chapter 2

Ron woke up to some dinky little house-elf poking his side.

"Young master is getting up soon! Sir is going to go to Knockturn Alley with his father today. Young master's father asked Dinky to wake you up, sir!" the elf squeaked.

"Knockturn Alley?!" Ron said, sounding both surprised and puzzled. "Since when do we have a house-elf?" Ron looked around. This definitely was not his room. He told the elf this, but Tinky just smiled. Ron threw off the covers and walked over to the full length mirror.

"AHHHHHHH!"

Tinky smiled mischievously again and began to lay out clothes on the unmade bed.

Ron was in complete shock. Why was he in Draco's body? "Bloody Hell," he whispered to Draco's reflection. "This can't be happening." The one thing that seemed perfectly clear in Ron's mind was that if he was in Draco's body, then Draco must be in his. And if Draco was in his body, Ron knew that Draco would take that chance to screw with Ron's life as much as possible. But if Draco could do it, then so could he.

**********

Draco had gotten dressed in some of Ron's clothes and was now on his second helping of bacon and toast. He had to admit, for a Weasley Molly made a pretty good breakfast. Percy and Ginny sat on either side of him, Fred and George across the table.

"You're looking a bit ill, Ron. Are you okay?" Percy asked.

"No, he's not mum!" Ginny piped up. "He was having an identity crisis early this morning. He almost knocked the bathroom door down trying to get me out of there."

Mrs. Weasley clamped a warm, soft hand against Draco's forehead, very much like Ginny.

"Get off me...er...mum. I'm fine."

"Well, if you're sure. But have some more toast, Ron. After breakfast you're all to degnome the garden."

Draco choked on his bacon. Ginny began slapping his back vigorously.

"Degnome the garden?" He gasped. "That's for servants!"

George looked up from his eggs. "Our mistake, Ron. We'll just tell one of our many house-elfves to go take care of the garden. Will that be okay with you?" he said mordantly.

Draco glared at him but followed the rest of the Weasleys outside. He watched, unsure of what to do, as Fred stooped down and picked up a wriggling gnome. Draco wrinkled his nose in disgust.

"Whatssa matter? Is Ickle Ronniekins scared of the gnomes?" Fred asked.

Draco nearly laughed out loud. "Ronniekins? Oh that's priceless. I'll have to remember that one," he thought.

He picked up a gnome and spun it around, but he let go too soon and the gnome flew backward into his face. Draco felt only stupidity at first, but that feeling was soon followed by one of intense pain as the Gnome sank its needle-like teeth into the end of Draco's nose.

"AHHHHHH! GET IF OFF ME!" he shouted. Flapping his arms wildly, Draco ran around the garden, screaming and violently shaking his head trying to throw the gnome off of his nose.

Ginny was hopping worriedly up and down and biting her nails. Fred and George were doubled up with laughter; Fred was lying in the dirt, clutching his stomach while George was pounding his fist against the side of the shed, tears streaming down his face. Percy was fumbling for his wand, a look of pure annoyance on his face. Draco was having a hard time seeing because the gnome was right in front of his eyes. He shook his head again but the gnome just tightened his jaws. Draco yelled again and ran straight into the side of the shed with a loud THUMP. He keeled over backwards and landed on the muddy ground, face up. The gnome climbed off his face with the utmost delicacy. Draco looked up into the dull, gray, cloudy sky.

"Ow," he moaned.

Ten minutes later Draco sat in the Weasley's living room holding an icepack gingerly against his swollen, purple nose. Fred and George, who claimed they couldn't stand to be in the same room as him without laughing, had gone upstairs to their rooms where they were supposedly writing to their friend, Lee Jordon, about the incident.

Draco was mad beyond reason but thankful that it was "Ron" who had been made to be a fool instead of him. His nose was tender, but at least the scar would be on Ron's nose and not his. Draco couldn't stand the thought of an imperfection on his faultless body. He enjoyed looking at himself in the mirror and freaked out even if one sliver strand of hair was out of place.

Mrs. Weasley bustled into the living room with a cup of hot cocoa. She gave it to Draco, and then kissed his forehead. It was all Draco could do to keep from slapping her across the face.

"Don't worry about the gnomes, Ron," she said. "Fred and George will finish the job. You just relax. Remember, Harry and Hermione are coming over in a few hours to stay with us for the rest of the summer." She smiled at him, patted his knee, and walked back into the kitchen obviously missing the look of pure shock and horror on Draco's face.

*******

"Draco! Draco, get down here this instant! We have to get going!" Lucius Malfoy's booming voice carried up the stairs where Ron was yanking one of Draco's black sweaters over his head.

"Er...coming, um, Father." The word made him cringe. He grabbed Draco's school cloak which was draped over the back of a chair and hustled down the stairs, still trying to figure out how he had ended up in Draco's body. Mr. Malfoy was waiting by the fireplace. There was a roaring fire in the grate.

"You first, Draco," Mr. Malfoy said gruffly holding out a small velvet bag filled with Floo Powder. Ron took some and threw it into the fire. He stepped in after it and, with only the slightest hesitation, shouted,

"Knockturn Alley!"

There was a whirl of green smoke. Ron tucked his elbows in and closed his eyes. He flew out of a grate and stood up, brushing soot off of Draco's clothes. Draco's dad zoomed out of the grate, maintaining his balance.

"Come along, Draco," he said.

Ron followed obediently. They walked out of the store and into the street. Ron looked around nervously at the strange people who were stalking about in dark colored cloaks. A group of five boys ran up to him; two of them Ron knew from school. Gregory Goyle and Vincent Crabbe.

"Hello, Draco," Goyle said in his slurred voice. "Is your father going to the meeting tonight?"

Ron had no idea what he was talking about. "Um...I don't know."

Mr. Malfoy walked up to Ron. "You stay here and play with your little friends," he told Ron. "I'll meet you back here in an hour. I have some business to attend to." He turned to Crabbe. "Is your father around? I need to speak with him."

"He's in Borgin and Burkes, sir," Crabbe replied dutifully. "I think he's purchasing some things for the tonight's meeting."

"Excellent," Lucius said. With a swish of his cloak he stalked off in the direction of the shops.

"So, Draco, what do you want to do?" a short kid with blond hair asked.

"Let's go into Diagon Alley and check out Quality Quidditch Supplies," piped another boy with sullen eyes.

"No way!" shouted Crabbe. "That prat Harry Potter could be there! I'm not going into any place where he is!"

Ron's face grew red, and he almost yelled out loud in his friend's defense. As he stood there clenching and unclenching his fists trying to maintain his anger a thought surfaced in his mind.

Harry Potter. Oh, no! Harry and Hermione are coming to stay for the rest of the holiday with us!

"I...er...need to purchase some quills in Diagon Alley, however, so I need to go there. By myself," he said shortly. The other boys nodded their heads and let him walk past them. Once he was out of sight and well into Diagon Alley, Ron broke into a run. He needed to warn Harry and Hermione but he had no way of contacting them. He knew that Harry was going to Hermione's house so they could travel by Floo Powder from her fireplace (The Dursley's flat out forbade having their fireplace hooked up to the Floo Network again after last summer's incident). Hermione was supposed to pick up Harry and bring him to her house a few hours before her fireplace was going to be hooked up to the Network.

Suddenly, Ron remembered that Hermione had sent him her phone number by owl. He didn't have it with him; the parchment was sitting on top of the fish tank in his room. He tried hard to remember the numbers.

"Is that a five or a three!" he thought drastically. He hit his head hard with a fist. "Come on! Come on! Oh well, I'll try both."

Ron ran through the Leaky Caldron almost tripping over some witch's feet. "Sorry," he muttered as he pushed open the door and stepped out to the Muggle London. He had never really been in Muggle London except for when he went to Kings Cross to catch the Hogwarts Express. He looked around for a payphone and found one at the corner of a street two blocks down.

A man passed him, dressed in a business suit, and gave him a weird look. Suddenly, Ron remembered he was wearing Draco's school cloak. He supposed that muggles weren't accustomed to people walking around in black cloaks. He shrugged it off and hid it in an alleyway by the Leaky Caldron. He ran over to the phone and picked it up, staring at it blankly. He had never used a phone before unless you counted the time in his third year when he had tried to call Harry. Hesitantly, he held the receiver up to his ear. He paused and then dialed Hermione's number.

A voice told him to deposit money.

"Okay, um where do I put it? Hello? Excuse me?" Ron asked the voice. When he got no answer he hung the phone up angrily. How was he supposed to call Hermione when he didn't have Muggle money?

"Great," he muttered, kicking at the drain in the road. "Just great." Something glinted under the leaves in the drain.

"Muggle money!" Ron exclaimed earning himself a strange look from a lady who was passing by. Looking around, he shoved his hand into the gutter and pulled out the money. Ron dashed back into the phone booth and eventually found the slot to put the money in. He put half of the money in the slot. It jangled as it fell.

"Please let it be enough!" he thought. Then he heard the beep beep beep that his dad had referred to as the dial tone when he had taught him how to use the phone two summers ago.

"Come on, Hermione! Pick up the phone! Please!" he muttered.

"Hello. Joe's Pizza. Our special today is the Hawaiian Pineapple Surprise. How can I help you?"

"Er..." said Ron remembering not to yell. "I think I have to wrong number."

"Ok, mate. But are you sure you don't want to try the Hawaiian Surprise?"

"No, er, that's okay. Thanks anyway."

"Suit yourself."

Ron hung up. He threw in the rest of the money and picked up the receiver again. "Guess it was a five after all."

*******

"Have you done all of your homework yet?"

Harry laughed at his friend's remark. "Nice to see you too, Hermione," he responded. Hermione's parents were helping him unload his trunk and Hedwig's cage from their car. Hermione was standing on the cement stoop of her house overseeing the unloading.

"Sorry I couldn't come to get you with my parents, Harry. My cousin's over and we needed someone to watch out for her. She only listens to me." Hermione laughed and came down off the stoop. "You can put your stuff in my room for now.

"Uh, and, Harry. My cousin isn't a witch so don't say anything about Hogwarts or...er," she looked away, "other things."

She had teetered on the verge of saying "You-Know-Who" but had decided against it. Summer Holiday had just begun and she didn't think Harry needed reminding of last year just yet.

"I won't," he promised. Hermione smiled and grabbed the other end of the trunk. Together they hauled it up the stairs and put it in Hermione's room. Harry had to keep from laughing out loud when he saw Hermione's room. It was just how he had imagined it. Her bed, curtains and rug were a lavender purple color and all along the walls were bookcases, positively exploding with books. He walked over to one of the book cases and ran his thumb across a very thin book. He pulled it off the shelf and read the cover.

"Dick, Jane and Spot. Very interesting, Hermione."

"Oh. That was my mother's. She gave it to me for one of my birthdays, and it was the first book I ever learned how to read." She took the book from Harry's hands and placed it lovingly back on the shelf.

He gave her a skeptical look.

"Really!" she protested. "I got it when I was three."

"And you haven't thrown it away?"

"Why would I throw a book away? That's horrible!" Hermione stated.

"I bet you still read it."

"What was that, Harry?"

"Nothing."

"I do not still read that!" Hermione shouted indignantly.

"Sure, Hermione," Harry said skeptically, smiling at her.

Suddenly, a red haired girl of about seven ran into Hermione's room. She was dressed in khakis and a blue t-shirt and she had bright green eyes, like Harry's.

"Hermy! Why's there an owl in the hallway?" she asked.

Harry smiled and said, "Oh...er...that would be mine. That's Hedwig. She's my pet." He went out into the hallway and brought Hedwig back to Hermione's room.

"Harry, this is my cousin, Sammy. Sammy this is Harry," Hermione introduced them.

"I'm Hermione's friend from school," he said. Hermione winced and Harry gave her a puzzled look.

"Hermy goes to an all girls' school in Scotland," Sammy stated, gazing at Harry quizzically.

"Oh!" Harry said. "Well, I go the boy's equivalent of Hermione's school. Our schools have dances and Quidd... I mean hockey games and things like that together. That's where we met. At a game. Yeah."

"That's neat. Maybe I could go to your school someday and get to meet people from all different schools too, Hermy!" Sammy said, her eyes wide.

"Yea..."Hermione said. "Maybe."

"I'm going outside to play with the garden hose!" Sammy announced. " 'Bye, Harry!"

"Goodbye," Harry said. Once Sammy had left Hermione's room, Harry turned to Hermione. "Why didn't you tell me you tell people you go to an all girls' school?" he hissed.

"Sorry, it kind of slipped my mind. But you covered it up good," she added sarcastically. "'I go to the boy's equivalent. We met at a game. Yeah, that's it.'" She mocked.

"Shut up, Hermione," Harry said. "Or should I say, Hermy!"

Hermione turned red. "When she was little she couldn't pronounce my name so she called me Hermy. It's stuck ever since," she explained hastily.

"Ok, Hermy."

"Stuff it, Harry."

"Whatever you say, Hermy."

It was a good thing the phone rang at that exact instant otherwise Hermione would have practically bitten Harry's head off. Hermione dashed to the phone on her bedside table. "Hello?... DRACO?!... I know it's you, don't try and deny it...You could have at least tried to disguise your voice if you were going to...how did you get my...How dare you say you're Ron!...you are most certainly not...no...but how...MALFOY!...all right if you're Ron then prove it!" There was a pause in the conversation in which Hermione mouthed to Harry, "It sounds like Malfoy but he says he's Ron."

"Ask him whether he thinks if Sirius is innocent or not. If he says yes then he's Ron," Harry mouthed back.

Hermione asked the question. There was a very long pause. It sounded to Harry like whoever was on the other end of the phone was rambling on about every little thing to prove to Hermione that he was Ron.

"Harry, pick up the phone in my parent's room," Hermione said.

Harry picked up the phone. He heard Draco Malfoy's voice.

"Sirius Black is innocent! He's Harry's Godfather. We were all down in the tree remember? Lupin was there and I had a broken leg, and Scabbers turned out to Peter Pettigrew. In our second year we went to Nearly Headless Nick's death day party and Peeves was there and he was throwing Peanuts at Moaning Myrtle and yelling Pimply! Pimply! The Polyjuice Potion! I was Crabbe and we pretended that I had a stomach ache because it was wearing off! Hermione! We saved you from a troll, Hermione! I'm Ron you gotta believe me. I woke up this morning and I was in Draco's body and I think he's in mine. Harry it's me!"

Harry had heard enough. There was no way Draco would know about the Polyjuice Potion or the Death Day Party.

"Ron?" he whispered.

"It's me!" Ron whispered back.

"Why are you calling us?" Hermione asked.

"To warn you. If I'm in Draco's body, then he's in mine. That means that Draco will be at the Burrow when you two arrive. It won't be me."

"Great!" complained Hermione.

"Yeah, tell me about it. You didn't wind up in the Malfoy's Manor this morning." Ron sighed. "So what are we going to do?"

"I dunno," Hermione said thoughtfully.

"Harry," said Ron. "I can hear your smile from here. What are thinking?"

"Well," Harry said mischievously, the smile evident in the way he was talking. "I'm thinking that this might be the perfect opportunity to have a little fun."