Harry Potter and the Burden of Becoming

Caduceus

Story Summary:
Sirius has died, and as Harry struggles with his guilt, new neighbors move in across the street on Privet Drive. But this foreign family from the Middle East has a very beautiful daughter, and she's taken a liking to Harry. But just as Harry must hide his own true identity, so too are the secrets that run deep within the Darbinyan family - secrets of death, secrets of life, secrets that will unwittingly guide Harry to rebirth, and the ultimate discovery of how Voldemort must be defeated.

Chapter 67 - Dreaming with the Snake

Chapter Summary:
The night to save Sirius from behind the veil has finally arrived. Only things don't go nearly as well as Harry had hoped. It seems his dearest friends are determined to stop him, but at what cost?
Posted:
05/10/2006
Hits:
2,316
Author's Note:
Emma continues to see me through these chapters... what a great beta! Stay away, she's mine!


Harry Potter and the Burden of Becoming

Chapter 67 - Dreaming with the Snake

~~~***~~~

The full moon loomed bright on the horizon as the sun dipped and set to the west. The sky was a brilliant red with flickers of gold where the sun skipped off the edges of the few floating clouds. It wasn't the Mediterranean, but the lake's reflection of the scene made Harry wonder if such a beautiful sight could be rivaled. But then, he was biased; tonight was the night. For the fiftieth time he fiddled with the small potions bottle in his pocket. It contained the secret ingredient that would set Sirius free -- ten gallons of pure water welled from a source of endless magic. Of course, he would need only a small fraction of that, but he wasn't taking chances. Mixed with Lucius Malfoy's pure blood in a basin cast of gold, the ingredients would open the Curtain of Phenolem. He'd given Tonks back the key that would allow the basin's lock to spin, and together the two had deciphered the proper runes. She would meet him tonight after-hours at the Ministry of Magic; the Portkey was under his pillow in the boys' dormitory.

"What are you looking at?" asked Hermione lightly as she sat at the table in the common room reviewing her Arithmancy notes. Harry turned back from the window to speak to her.

"Have you ever seen anything more beautiful?" he asked, and then turned back to look out the window. Hermione pushed back her chair, stood up and walked over next to Harry.

"Oh my," she said breathlessly, taking in the scene, "what an evening."

The ripples of the lake continued to shimmer, flashing a myriad of colours just as the first stars began to appear in the night sky.

"Look!" Harry called. The great giant squid of the lake had breached the water's surface, sending a huge plume of water into the air, and pushing an enormous wave of water to each bank. Harry and Hermione watched as the rings spread out in all directions and the squid disappeared from view. "Summer will be here soon," Harry whispered.

"N.E.W.T. exams will be here sooner," said Hermione in anxious anticipation, almost like a small child moving up in queue for circus tickets. Still soaking in the sight, she put her arm about Harry's waist. "I'm supposed to help Ron tonight with his History homework. Maybe you and Gabriella could join us?"

The change in direction of the conversation was too quick for Harry, and he found himself grinding gears as his tongue tied against his teeth. As much as he'd told himself he didn't care if Hermione knew his plans, he couldn't bear to tell her.

"Erm... join you?" he sputtered. "Er, no... we can't, or I can't... tonight that is. I-I'm... well, really behind in Potions and all."

"I thought you finished Snape's assignment last night?" questioned Hermione with surprise.

"Oh, that... no, I... well, that I just told you so you wouldn't get on my case about... you know... homework and all." Hearing this, Hermione pulled her hand away and her eyes narrowed.

"Is that what you think I do?" she suddenly snapped, her voice growing in intensity. "Get on your case?"

"No... I just meant that--"

"Hey, Harry, Hermione" called Neville. "Are you going to dinner?" He, Seamus and Walreux were standing at the bottom of the staircase.

"Sure, Neville!" called Harry. Then quietly he whispered, "Come on, Hermione, let's eat. You know I just don't think clearly on an empty stomach. I'm sorry."

"You sound like Ron," she said with a puckered smile and thin eyes. Finally, she uncrossed her arms and let out a sigh. "Very well."

"Brilliant," said Harry brightly, putting his arm around her shoulders, and the group made their way out the portrait and down to dinner listening to Hermione go on about how important N.E.W.T. exams were, and how if only they studied a little harder...


In the Great Hall, much of the talk was centered on Ravenclaw's loss to Hufflepuff last week and the upcoming match, next week, of Slytherin and Gryffindor. Cho had caught the Snitch in last week's match, but only after Ravenclaw was down by over two-hundred points with no chance of climbing back. That put Gryffindor as the only house with two wins. If Gryffindor were to beat Slytherin next week they would be undefeated and the house champions; if they were to lose, Slytherin would also have two wins and because of their defeat of Gryffindor in head-to-head competition Slytherin would be the house champions. There was tremendous speculation over Malfoy, many wondering if he had been clean from potions long enough to be effective against Harry, but that was overshadowed by the possibility that Ron Weasley would play Keeper for Slytherin.

Harry sat across from Neville and Peter Walreux as a plate of beef strips, steamed vegetables and applesauce appeared before him. He cast a glance to the teacher's table and saw, as expected, that Tonks was absent from her position next to Hagrid -- a fact that did not go unnoticed by Hermione.

"I wonder where Tonks is this evening?" she asked casually, but with a hint of concern.

"Probably, out being an Auror again," said Neville, taking a drink of milk.

"Yeah, there's Death Eaters to be had," added Seamus, who was seated next to Hermione.

"No," said Hermione thoughtfully, "she's always here on the full moon." For the briefest instant, her eyes flashed to Harry who was focused on the strips of beef before him. Still, he caught her look out of the corner of his eye and held his gaze onto his plate until she looked away. Hermione took one bite of dinner and started to tap her spoon nervously against the top of the dinner table. Neville began to talk to Peter about the multiple ways to harvest Poisonous Plums from a Killing Caedo tree. Hermione's tapping grew louder.

"I'm really not that hungry," she said pushing in her plate. "I think I'll go back and study a bit."

"Later, Hermione," said Seamus, and Hermione stepped between the Ravenclaw and Gryffindor tables toward the doors of the Great Hall. Seamus turned to Neville and said, "Over a week till N.E.W.T. exams, an' she's worried if she's studied enough! She's more prepared than the three of us combined," he said, kind enough to include Harry in the equation, and kind enough to leave out Walreux.

For his part, Harry watched Ron stand from the Slytherin table and meet her at the entrance. The two spoke, then glanced back at Harry. Ron showed a distinct level of discomfort when he saw Harry looking back at him, and quickly turned his head.

There was a burst of laughter, and Harry spun to see Patrick O'Riley smiling at something Dennis Creevey had said; milk was running out Patrick's nose. Harry couldn't help but smile himself. "Excellent", he thought, but when he glanced back to the front doors, both Ron and Hermione were gone. He was a bit nervous, and reached into his pocket yet again and twiddled the bauble inside.

It was far too early to be worrying about anything, and yet the palms of Harry's hands were wet with perspiration, slipping about the small glass vial holding such a large amount of liquid treasure. Searching for something to do, his eyes looked for Gabriella at the Slytherin table; instead, they found Draco looking straight back at him. While everyone else seemed animated and excited, filled with the energy of the new moon, Draco sat like a great rock fixed in a turbulent sea. Stoically, he held Harry's gaze with his own, then almost imperceptible narrowed his eyes and nodded his head to the front doors. A moment later, he stood and was walking alone out of the Great Hall. Harry watched him leave, and then excused himself.

"I'm not too hungry either," he said to his friends. "Maybe later."

Walking out into the corridor Harry caught a glimpse of Malfoy's pale-blonde hair walking toward the steps leading down to the dungeons. He followed him below ground and joined him in an empty classroom adjacent to Potions. Malfoy held his wand up and sealed the room.

"You're going to have to teach me that sometime," Harry said brightly.

"Yeah, right," answered Malfoy dully. "Hell, I think the damn house elf stopped following me weeks ago. Still, better safe than sorry as father always says." He grunted and then pulled out a bench seat from behind a desk, sighed heavily, flopped down, and stared blankly out in space.

"Well?" Harry asked. Malfoy looked tired, or bored, or angry, or a mixture of all three. Slowly he lifted his eyes to meet Harry's.

"That's my line, Harry," said Malfoy, still dryly but with a pinch of irritation. Harry looked about, hoping to find a window to divert his gaze, but there were none in the dungeons. "Yeah," said Malfoy, hunching with his elbows on his knees, "that's what I thought you'd say... nothing."

"I don't know what--"

"THAT'S DOXY DUNG!" Malfoy exploded, taking to his feet and facing Harry head on. "It doesn't work that way, Potter! Tell me why in the name of Morgana you're going to be at the Ministry tonight at midnight!"

You could have blown Harry over with a fairy. If he'd had trouble trying to cover his tracks with Hermione earlier, this would be impossible. His opportunity to respond coolly vanished, and with it any hope of fabricating a lie.

"How did you--"

"We were supposed to be a team!" Malfoy yelled again, and this time sorrow and disappointment mixed in with his words. The blonde dropped back down on the wooden bench seat. His head fell into his hands as he clenched the locks of hair falling at the sides of his face with his fingers. "You've been using me since we started." Malfoy sighed. "He was right." Harry wasn't sure who he was, but he knew now was not the right time to ask.

"That's not true," Harry said softly. There was a deep pain that surrounded Malfoy, although Harry didn't know what it was centered on; there were so many possibilities. He walked closer to the Slytherin.

"Isn't it?" Malfoy spat. "Going to the Ministry with a member of the Order, and it's not something you want to share? What's the matter, Harry? Don't you trust me?" The words were sharp, bitter. "I've spent my bank account in demonstrations; there's nothing left."

"I... I trust you," said Harry. His words were honest, solid and sincere, and their tone pulled Malfoy's gaze off the floor. "I'm not going because she's with the Order, Draco. It... it's personal."

"Personal?" cried out Malfoy, the rage ebbing back to the surface. "Well it's not personal to my father! It's not personal to the Death Eaters! It's not personal to the Dark Lord!" Malfoy took to his feet and stormed over to a large globe of Jupiter floating above the professor's desk, and spun it madly. He turned and looked back at his friend. "How is it that every dark magician between here and Tibet knows where you'll be tonight? Every one, that is, apart from me!" He slammed the globe with his fist and it raced across the floor shattering against the wall.

Now Harry's forehead began to prickle with perspiration. It had been a trap all along, but then part of him always knew it was a trap. Why hadn't he asked Malfoy to begin with? Without thinking, he reached into his pocket and began to spin the vial in his fingers. The other part of him still wanted to believe that Tonks was being truthful, but its voice was small and was now but a whisper. The classroom's walls began to slide their way toward him. Malfoy noted the apprehension, the fear filling Harry's face; not fear of what he might face, but fear of failing.

"I can't just let him die," Harry whispered to the air. "It... it was all - my - fault!" He was growing warmer by the second, the air was growing heavy, thick, and Harry's legs seemed to lose the will to bear their burden. "It can't end like this," he said, trying to pull in great gulps of air, but his breaths felt empty. His vision began to tunnel down to pricks of light, and Harry stumbled trying to make it to the door. His weight collapsed onto a desk that flipped over, and Harry fell hard to the floor, the desk landing on top of him. He felt just like he did when he returned to number twelve, Grimmauld Place last summer. "Sirius," he whispered, "I'm sorry." He couldn't catch his breath and everything began to spin as his vision failed.

A voice echoed from the abyss. "He's not gone you know, just on the other side." It was Luna Lovegood, but he couldn't see her. "The voices... didn't you hear them? If only we could find a way to bring him home. But you know the way, don't you, Harry? You have the key! Do you see my mother?" But Harry couldn't see anything. There was another voice, dark and foreboding. "What would you give, Harry? What would you give to bring him back?" Everything began to spin, and Harry felt like retching. Then Luna's voice returned, but faded with each word as she said, "If you see my mother, tell her I miss her so." An overwhelming burst of nausea filled Harry, and it spewed forth all over the classroom floor.

"Damn, Potter," hissed Malfoy, "these were new boots!" Malfoy pulled his wand and cleaned the floor with a flick of his wrist, then helped Harry to a sitting position on the spotless stones. He sat down next to his adversary, his partner, and let out a long slow breath. They sat like that, side-by-side for some minutes. Harry continued to tremble, awash in unbridled emotions. Finally, Malfoy asked, "Black? Is that what this is about? Sirius Black? Your... your godfather?"

Hearing the name, Harry again began to pull in huge gulps of air. All year he'd waited for this moment, his chance to redeem his stupidity, and now... "He died because of me!" Harry's voice cracked, and he grabbed Malfoy by the front of his robes. "I killed him, Draco. I lured him there and set him before the curtain. Your aunt just gave the final push, that's all." Harry's body gave a tremendous shudder. "It was me!" Tears welled up in Harry's eyes, and the film that had long been absent began to play once more in Harry's mind. "It's ruined! It's all ruined!" Harry broke down into heaving sobs. Still clutching Malfoy's robes he dropped his head into the Slytherins lap and cried.

Malfoy's back stiffened as he looked about the room; surely his charm on the walls had worn away by now. If the house elf was about, their cover would be blown. Harry continued to cry and, not reluctantly but hesitantly, Malfoy put his arm on Harry's shoulder. Whatever bitterness he'd been feeling evaporated; Harry had his reasons... family, a reason Draco understood all too well.

After a few moments, Harry sat up and bashed his hand against the stone floor. "Damn!" he yelled as he tilted his head back and wiped his eyes. Still, staring upwards his head against the wall Harry whispered, "I don't care; I'm going to do it anyway."

"It's suicide," Malfoy whispered.

"I can't live knowing I had the chance to bring him back and then did nothing. I've got to try."

There was a long silence before Malfoy spoke to the floor... words that would take Harry a long time to understand.

"I guess for you, it was your parents... and now Sirius. I don't know, maybe..." His hands were folded in on each other, clasped in something resembling a prayer.

"Maybe what?" asked Harry, looking at Malfoy who still had his eyes fixed at the patterns in the stone floor.

"Did you... have you ever wanted something so very much that every waking moment, every dream, and all times in between were held by that one desire?" Before Harry could speak, Malfoy went on. "And yet, know that no matter what effort you put toward realizing that desire, that passion, your wish would never ever come true?"

"You're right," agreed Harry with a hushed whisper, "my parents." Malfoy nodded knowingly with him.

"I came to Hogwarts ready to be who I thought I was... Draco Malfoy, son of Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy, the purest of pure-blood wizards. Heir of wealth and power; the world was mine and all would serve my will. I thought I knew, Harry... but I was wrong. Last fall, the weekend after Cho returned to Hogwarts, I stumbled across the Mirror of Erised. I think it was a cruel plan of that gray bearded fool of a Headmaster you prattle on about so much." Malfoy let out a short snicker. His eyes left the floor and looked straight ahead at the opposite wall, but their focus was well beyond the walls of the castle.

"I saw... I saw the thing I knew I always wanted. I saw a future that I knew I could never have. I didn't want to leave. I sat there for hours, but then Dumbledore came, said something quite Dumbledore-like, and sent me on my way." Malfoy sighed. "I never did find the mirror again." The Slytherin paused for a wistful moment and then stood, dusted his robes, and pulled Harry to his feet.

"I think Dumbledore was wrong. I think it would have been better to die in front of the glass, than have this life." Harry started to speak, but Malfoy held two fingers over Harry's lips.

"Shhh. I may not be able to have my dream, Harry, but maybe I can do something about yours." The Slytherin pulled his robe up tight about his shoulders and started toward the door. "I'm off to the Burrow." Harry's jaw dropped; his face showed his confusion and surprise. "Yeah, he's been having a right laugh about that one. We've been back about a week." Draco shook his head. "I can buy you maybe an hour around midnight, Harry. After that..." he turned and looked back, "we're both dead."

Before Draco turned to leave, Harry noticed the scar on the Slytherin's face fade.

"Draco," Harry whispered, following him to the door. He put his hand against Draco's face. "It... it's gone." Draco lifted his hand next to Harry's. There was no raised edge of the sword or snake, no tightening as he smiled. The scar had vanished.

"Is it?" Draco asked nonplussed. "Huh," he exhaled in a short burst. He shrugged his shoulders and dropped his hand. Toe-to-toe, his gray eyes narrowed looking through Harry's green. "I was so hoping to kick your arse next week. Not to worry though, the Quidditch cup will still go to Slytherin; we've got Weasles." He patted Harry lightly on the side of the face. "And Harry, tonight... don't dawdle; get him and get out. I... I never want to see you again."

Before Harry could say another word, Draco slipped out the door and walked briskly toward the Slytherin common room. Holding a hand to the side of his own face, Harry watched as he disappeared around the corner. The floor felt like it was swaying back and forth, as if he were in the hull of a great ship beset by a storm at sea. A lone drip of perspiration wicked its way down from Harry's brow. There would be no turning back now, Draco's life hung in the balance. Time? What time was it?

Quickly, Harry charged down the corridor and began the ascent to Gryffindor tower. He'd just made it past the library when her voice stopped him in his tracks.

"Harry? Harry, what's going on?" Gabriella rolled a parchment she was examining, and quickly stepped over to meet him. Her words were steeped in concern. She'd seen his mood swinging all day, and she knew something was amiss. The drip of perspiration on Harry's brow was now a torrent of sweat. The back of his shirt was soaked and his face flush.

"Er... nothing, why?" he tried to say innocently.

"Come over and sit down," she said temptingly, "tell me what's wrong." Harry's eyes darted about like a chipmunk scanning for safety. Near the entrance of the library stood a group of students, all from different houses, studying Transfiguration. James Chang was there, wearing green robes. This was the last place to be talking about leaving Hogwarts in the middle of the night and he didn't have time to find somewhere more secluded.

"Er... no," Harry said nervously, "I-I'm just going to go back to the common room and get to bed. Good night's rest and all." He offered a weak smile.

"Very well," she whispered dejectedly. "You do look warm." She reached over and held his face in her hands and gave him a kiss on the forehead. A cool breeze seeped through Harry's brain and down his back; what a touch. There were a few howls from the table of first years. When she let go and opened her eyes, the twinkle Harry expected to see was absent. Instead, her eyes were distant and concerned.

"You know I love you, don't you?" she said. It was not an unwelcome comment, but felt jarringly out of place considering the conversation. Harry looked at her and smiled. He began to unbutton his shirt which elicited another catcall from the table.

"I want you to hold something for me... just for awhile." He pulled off the necklace that Professor McGonagall had given him and placed it around her neck. "It... it's very special."

"Harry?" Gabriella asked, her eyes filling with fear. He clasped the chain around her neck.

"There... Beautiful," he said with a smile, pressing his hand warmly against the charm that now glittered against her chest in the candlelight. He leaned in and kissed her cheek. "I'm really tired. I'll see you in the morning, I swear." He started up the staircases once again, Gabriella watching his every step. As the last one finally spun into place, he stepped off and looked back down at her. "I love you too!" he called, and disappeared down the corridor to the Fat Lady.

Speaking the password, he mentally braced himself for the questions he knew Hermione would pelt him with once he walked through the door. He would stick with "tired... sick... goodnight..." and that would be that. As the door opened, he entered to see a very quiet common room. A few students were already preparing banners for next week's game against Slytherin. One showed the likeness of Godric Gryffindor severing the head of a large green serpent -- a reenactment of the Sorting Hat's Song. Not surprisingly, Harry found the familiar sight of Ginny next to Dean on the couch in front of the fireplace. He scanned the room, but there was no Hermione.

"Hey, Harry," said Ginny in welcome as he walked through the portrait. She turned back to Dean as they continued to do their homework.

"Have you seen Hermione?" Harry asked.

"She and Ron were talking downstairs," Ginny replied. "I guess that was about an hour ago."

"Then Ron stopped by to see you," added Dean. "He went upstairs to look for you, but you were gone."

"You let him in?" Harry asked sharply. "He's in Slytherin!"

"He's my brother!" snapped Ginny. "And he'll always be a Gryffindor."

Concerned, Harry ran up the spiral staircase to the boys' dormitory. A quick scan told him immediately what was missing... his broom. The Caduceus which always hung to the side of Harry's bed was gone. Quickly, he ran back down.

"Did you see him take it?" he asked loudly. "Did you let your brother walk out of here with my Caduceus?"

"What are you talking about?" said Ginny, her own voice pitching higher. Harry could see at once she didn't know.

"My broom! Your brother's taken my broom!" Harry's voice was agitated and his pitch high. In Ginny's eyes, it was more excitement than the situation warranted.

"He probably just took it for a spin, Harry. I doubt that... oh no!"

"What?" Harry exclaimed.

"The match!" she cried. "He's taken it so you won't have it for the match! Slytherin's brainwashed him! That little rat! I'll kill him!" She stood facing Harry. "I'm so sorry, I wasn't thinking, Harry."

Harry wanted to scream that he didn't take the bloody broom as a prank; he took it to fly to the Ministry. He kicked a table and it went flying across the room. Ginny was mortified.

"Look, we can get Cho to--"

"Forget the damn broom!" Harry spat, and he stormed out of the common room into the corridor. He was breathing heavily, trying to bring focus back on his plan -- Tonks' plan -- trying to clear his mind of unnecessary thoughts, but here was not the place to forget. Stains of Dementor blood still splotched the floor. Stick to the plan! Gathering himself, he walked back into the common room and announced he was going to bed early. If he acted quickly, he might still get there first.

"Goodnight!" he said loudly for everyone to hear. There were a few returns of the same, Ginny tried to apologize once more, and finally he slipped into the dormitory. He let out a sigh of relief when he found it empty.

He walked over to his bed and carefully pulled out the little white box from under his pillow. Inside was a small silver sphere - a Portkey to the Ministry. Tonks' words began to play in his head.

"Harry, this will take you to the corridor just outside the great hall where the Fountain of Magical Brethren is at the Ministry. Meet me there thirty minutes before midnight. I'll take care of the guards and we'll Apparate down to the chamber holding hands. I'll have everything ready by then; the basin and the blood will be waiting there. Until the end, we'll keep everything separate. You bring the water, and Harry... don't tell a soul." Tonks had seemed extremely anxious. It was clear she had wanted to say more, but couldn't, or wouldn't. Finally, she put on her best smile. "We can do this, Harry. I know we can!"

Harry wondered what it was she wanted to add; what little bit was she leaving out? And once we're downstairs I'm handing you over to Voldemort. He took a deep breath levitating his covers to look as if they had a body beneath. He pulled the curtains about his bed which was always a sign not to disturb, and pulled out the white box from off his desk. It was a bit early, but he wanted to make it to the Ministry before Ron and Hermione.

He wished he could have had the added power of the vivificus stone, and hoped that the added power was not now in the hands of his nemesis. He swallowed hard, double checking that the water was in his pocket and his wand was in his sleeve. Perhaps tonight the prophecy would be fulfilled, but in who's favor. Slowly, with a shaking hand, he reached out and took the silver orb in his fingers. There was the firm and familiar yank at his navel as the wind swirled in his face, and a moment later he was on his knees upon a highly polished dark wood floor. Taking in a breath, he froze. The air was filled with the smell of burning flesh. Looking up, he saw a guard propped in the corner, his eyes closed.

All was silent when he heard an incantation given with a high, cold voice. Harry's skin prickled as the corridor filled with the crackling sound of lighting from the large and splendid hall that waited just around the corner. There was a loud snap, and then a scream.

In a flash, Harry was on his feet, his wand at the ready. His heart began to pound but his hand was steady. If ever he needed his wits about him, it was now. He knew that high, cold voice -- Voldemort's; and he knew who uttered the scream -- Hermione Granger.


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