Harry Potter and the Burden of Becoming

Caduceus

Story Summary:
Sirius has died, and as Harry struggles with his guilt, new neighbors move in across the street on Privet Drive. But this foreign family from the Middle East has a very beautiful daughter, and she's taken a liking to Harry. But just as Harry must hide his own true identity, so too are the secrets that run deep within the Darbinyan family - secrets of death, secrets of life, secrets that will unwittingly guide Harry to rebirth, and the ultimate discovery of how Voldemort must be defeated.

Chapter 27

Chapter Summary:
With no word from Gabriella, Harry finds himseld falling for someone else. But just as he is about to give up hope, Hedwig returns with news, and with it comes an uncontrollable, and perhaps irrational urge to protect Gabriella at all cost.
Posted:
09/27/2005
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3,358


Harry Potter and the Burden of Becoming

Chapter 27 - Flying to the Falls

~~~***~~~

"We have an agreement for now, Harry," Dumbledore said with warm eyes, while Harry grinned from ear to ear. "As long as he continues to improve."

"He will sir," Harry assured him. "Madam Pomfrey says..."

"Yes, yes," Dumbledore interrupted. "We've been over all this for the past three days. It's against my better judgment, and if..."

"I'm sorry sir," Harry cut in. "It's getting late, and I promised Cho we would practice out on the pitch."

Dumbledore raised one eyebrow. "Practice?" he asked.

"Flying, sir," Harry replied eager to leave before Dumbledore changed his mind. The creases that had lined Dumbledore's face of late seemed to vanish, and a warmth filled his blue eyes.

"Remarkable, Harry," the wizard whispered. He put his hand on Harry's shoulder and walked him to the door. "Truly remarkable."

When Harry burst out of the castle, Caduceus in hand, he found the air crisp and the sky blue. It was Saturday, and the last two days had been his best since he'd come to Hogwarts. Seeing the severity of what was attacking Ron's brain, Madame Pomfrey was able to stop it, and in fact somewhat shrink the growing green mass. She was not, however, able to remove it completely. Still, the treatments were already having a noticeable effect on Ron. His headaches had diminished and his general mood had improved dramatically. He was also learning to shut out the unwanted voices--Occlumency with Professor Snape. Fortunately, Professor Snape's hatred of Harry didn't transfer to Ron Weasley, and the first two lessons seemed to go rather well according to Hermione. Against her will, she again found herself Ron and Harry's go-between. After three hard days of campaigning with Professor Dumbledore and Madame Pomfrey, Harry had fulfilled his pledge to Ron, but he still refused to associate with someone who couldn't accept people for what they were inside.

Outside, there was the slightest breeze in the air, and a squawking brought Harry's eyes up to the sky. A flock of white geese were flying south for the winter. Some two-dozen birds formed a large V in the air. Harry thought of Hedwig. She had still not returned. "It's over," he sighed to himself still stroking the silver earring that had never left his ear. Before falling asleep each night, it was the thought of Gabriella that was the last to leave his mind. But for the last three mornings, when he woke, it was the thought of Cho that was the first to enter.

He had risen early every morning to visit her in the hospital wing. She was trying to catch up on the work she'd missed in preparation for starting classes on Monday. Her mind was clear and sharp, and her ability to learn what she had missed over the last four weeks was astounding. Cho's attitude was upbeat and positive even though she still had little to no use of her right leg and was barely able to lift her right arm. Already, she had mastered writing with her left hand. "A true Ravenclaw," Harry admired. When he brought up flying her first night back, she began to cry.

"I'll never fly again, Harry." He held her tight until the tears had stopped. She had cut her hair short, and he stroked the left side of her head around her ear. He could feel the scar hidden behind her dark hair. Forehead to forehead, his green eyes looked deep into her brown.

"Yes you will," he said firmly. "This weekend." And a smile broke across her face.

The geese disappeared over the top of the castle and Harry continued to the pitch. As he approached he saw Cho standing at the north entrance. Well, not really standing so much as levitating. She was using a self-locomotion spell to move herself about. Other students were forbidden to use such spells in the interest of physical fitness. For Cho, however, it was her only practical means of getting from one part of the castle to the other.

In her left hand was her broom, a Nimbus 2001. For a moment Harry watched as she tried to mount the broom with her good leg holding fast with her good arm. A few feet from the ground, she switched and tried to hold with her right hand. The transfer was awkward and her center of balance shifted. Her right leg couldn't compensate and she spun off, hitting the ground hard with her left shoulder. Harry ran over and helped her to her feet. She held tight to his neck as he lifted. Far from being upset, Cho was as determined as ever.

"Well, that didn't work," she said in a matter of fact tone. She balanced on her left leg and brushed the grass off her pants with her left arm. "Without my right leg, Harry, I can't keep my balance." She looked to the sky. "A stiff wind and I'm done for."

"I said you'd fly again," said Harry confidently. "I didn't say it would be easy."

"Nope," Cho grunted trying to reach for her broom. "I think not." Harry took her hand, and straightened her up.

"I have another idea," he said. He had dropped his broom about twenty feet away. He was helping her balance so, without pulling out his wand, he raised his hand and called, "Accio Caduceus!" The broom popped into his hand. Cho gasped.

"You didn't..." she began.

"No, er... no I didn't," Harry stopped her. "Bit of a new trick I've picked up. I'd rather you not talk about it, not yet, okay?" Her eyes were wide, but then she smiled warmly and nodded.

"So many secrets, Harry," she said. "Will I ever learn them all?" Harry returned half a smile, but did not reply. Cho's eyes seemed to assess Harry as she said, "A challenge then."

"Here, try this," said Harry, handing her his broom and trying to shift the conversation. "Its charms hold you tight at two-hundred miles per hour. Let's see how they hold at two miles per hour." As before she mounted with her good leg. Harry could see that her center of balance was off, but the Caduceus compensated. Within a few seconds she was flying some twenty feet off the ground. Her face was beaming.

"Not too high Cho!" Harry called. Cho, grinning wildly, nosed the broom down, but wasn't ready for its quick response. Instantly, she was hurtling toward Harry. She pulled up on the nose and the broom stopped dead. Instinctively, Cho released the broom and held out her hand to stop her fall. It was exactly the wrong thing to do. While the broom stopped, she kept going, flipped in the middle of the air, and landed on Harry who was trying as best he could to catch her. Their heads hit and together they crashed to the ground. For a second Harry was dazed.

"Oh, Harry, are you okay?" Cho asked brushing the hair from the side of his face. Harry seemed to be having a tough time breathing, but when she turned his head to look at her, she saw that it was because he was laughing.

"I can't.... I can't... hah, hee, hee," Harry breathed. "Whooo! Did you see that? A triple summersault with a half twist!" He laughed again. "You should be in the Olympics! Hah... hah... heh..." The laughter was contagious and soon both of them were laughing hard with tears running down their cheeks. The sight was comical: Cho on top of Harry, splayed out on the grass in the middle of the Quidditch pitch. Finally, their laughter slowed, Cho wiped the tears from her eyes and held her hand to Harry's face.

"I... I haven't laughed since I saw you in the hospital," she whispered. "Thank you." She leaned down and kissed him lightly on the lips. Harry closed his eyes. The kiss was warm and gentle, and his heart began to race. Cho rolled over on her back feeling the thick, soft, grass beneath her. "What a beautiful day," she said with a smile as she took in the blue sky. Harry put his hands behind his head and crossed his legs.

"Yes," he said, "a beautiful day." Examining the sky together they began to describe what creatures or people they could see in the few clouds that billowed by. "Cho," he said, "I'm as happy today as I've been since I arrived." He sat up and looked down at her. "And it's all your fault!" He grinned, tickling her right side. She pulled away smiling. He reached out and held her right hand, and began stroking the fingers. "Can you feel that?" he asked.

"Yes," she sighed. "I have feeling in my leg too. It just won't do what my mind tells it to. The connections in my brain have been destroyed." She let out another deep breath. "Every day's a bit better though." Her words brought one of his chief concerns to the surface. His mind was caught on something he needed to know.

"And Malfoy?" Harry asked. Cho's eyes narrowed. "If you could have your way, would you have him destroyed?" His words were almost an offer. There was a somewhat sour smile that appeared on her face. Harry continued. "Most all of Ravenclaw is ready to tear anyone from Slytherin apart for what he did to you. I... I almost killed Malfoy myself." Harry's eyes faded off to somewhere across the pitch in the general direction of Hogsmeade. With her good hand, Cho pushed herself up level with Harry.

"When I arrived at Hogwarts the other night, my brother was in the hospital wing waiting for me. After I was settled in, he just paced the room from one side to the next. I could tell he was uncomfortable, and I finally asked him why. He told me that Malfoy had come up to him the day I was healed and apologized for what he'd done. He was fearful I'd be mad that he accepted the apology."

"Were you?" Harry asked.

"No," she paused. "I already accepted it myself."

"You... H-How?" Harry stammered.

"He and his mom came by St. Mungo's for a visit." She paused, thinking back in time, and all sourness left her face. "When I saw the scar on his face, my first thought was that he put it there himself, some sort of mark of support for You-Know-Who. I pointed at the scar and told him he could leave, if he was in league with... but he stopped my words. He said you put the mark there and wouldn't take it off."

"On the train," Harry nodded. "After..."

"He was... well... a different person, Harry," Cho continued. "Or maybe he was pretending to be. He apologized... his mom apologized... I don't know. What could I do? Tell them to shove off? So I accepted. They only stayed for a few more minutes, and most of that time was spent talking about you."

"About me?" Harry asked. "What about me?"

"Now I have a secret," she said with a grin, and pinched his side. The sun was dipping behind the high stadium seats to the west of the pitch casting a shadow over the two. The late afternoon breeze was beginning to pick up, and Cho began to shiver.

"We'd better get in," Harry said. He stood and helped Cho to her feet. She held him tight, more tightly than she really needed thought Harry happily. His broom was still floating some five feet off the ground. Seeing it, his eyes began to twinkle. "One more ride?" he offered. "Together?" Cho smiled and nodded. Harry mounted first and then Cho climbed on from behind holding him around the waist first with one hand and then more lightly with the other. Immediately the cool bite of the air disappeared. They were both warm and felt no breeze.

"It's amazing," she whispered her chin tight against his shoulder.

"Hold tight," he said. "This is what's amazing." And with that, Harry shot up from the ground high into the sky. The castle and the grounds fell away instantly growing smaller and smaller. A gentle nudge of the broom, and they were flying twenty feet off the canopy of the Forbidden Forest. A Threstral appeared on Harry's left flank and seemed to enjoy chasing along side the two of them. Cho didn't or couldn't see it. Harry arced to the right, and the Threstral sunk back into the trees. They pushed deeper into the center of the forest, when suddenly it opened up into a large clearing that revealed a tall cliff from which cascaded a large shimmering waterfall. Harry had never seen this place. He circled back and saw pools below. They were beautiful and inviting, but he knew better than to stop for a closer look.

"I think I've seen enough trees, how about some water," Cho whispered in Harry's ear and she squeezed Harry close. Seeing the glistening falls below, he was a bit confused by her words, but brought the broom back toward the castle and soon they were over the lake. He dropped the broom close to the water and accelerated. The broom's wake caused the water to spray into the sky as they past by. In seconds, they were nearly upon Hogsmeade. "We can't..." she began but Harry dropped his shoulder and they gently turned back once again toward the castle. As they came close, he pulled up high, and then plunged in a sharp dive toward the pitch from where they started.

"Don't let go this time," Harry called. But Cho was holding tight, her heart racing. A few feet from the ground, Harry pulled up and gently stopped. Cho let out a deep breath and loosened her grip ever so slightly. The sun was fading into the horizon as a bright full moon rose in the east. She laid her head against his back.

"Not bad," she said breathlessly and then laughed. They both got off the Caduceus and Cho brought out her wand. "Mi-Locomotus!" she called and her feet rose about six inches from the ground. "Accio broom!" Her Nimbus 2001 flew to her hands. "Is it time for dinner do you think? I may like to try the Great Hall tonight."

Together they made their way up to the castle. They were about to enter when Harry stopped and took Cho's hand.

"It was a perfect day, Cho," he said but there was sadness on his voice.

"Yes?" Cho asked anticipating more.

"It's just that... I need to tell you..." His words were stopped as Anthony Goldstein burst through the doors. He was a bit surprised to see the two of them at the entranceway, and took half a moment to gather his bearings.

"There you are!" he called to Cho and ignoring Harry. "I was just to the hospital wing and Madame Pomfrey is frantic. You were supposed to be back over an hour ago."

"Well, I thought maybe dinner in..." Cho started.

"Exactly!" Anthony cut in. "I'll get you to the hospital wing and," he shot a glance at Harry, "order up two dinners. Not to worry, I'll keep you company tonight," he said with a smile. Cho glanced at Harry and back to Anthony.

"Harry," she said, "maybe we can finish our talk tomorrow?"

Harry nodded. "Sure," he said. "Hey, Anthony, Cho was up flying today. She's brilliant."

"You were?" said Anthony, surprised. "That's fantastic! I told you she was terrific, didn't I Harry?" Anthony asked without moving his eyes from Cho.

"You sure did," answered Harry, but his own smile was fading.

"You can do anything you put your mind to Cho, anything," Anthony beamed taking her broom. "Come on. Let's get you back to Madame Pomfrey." Cho sighed, but she wore a smile on her face as she and Anthony went into the castle leaving Harry behind.

Harry started to walk back toward the pitch, but then stopped and sat against the base of a large statue. Broom in hand, he watched as the stars began to appear overhead. The familiar feeling of loneliness was beginning to encircle his heart again. It was growing dark, and his attention turned to the large red star overhead. He wasn't supposed to be out of the castle after dark. "Who would notice?" he thought. "Who would care?" Maybe someone. He stood up and mounted his broom. A flash later, and he was in front of Hagrid's cabin. He pounded on the door.

"Hagrid!" he called. "Hagrid!" There was no answer. "Probably at dinner," Harry whispered to himself. He sat on the footstep to Hagrid's cabin and looked back at the castle. Two students were running up the steps from the lake. Hearing them laugh, he thought of his afternoon with Cho and a smile crossed his face. It had been a truly spectacular day. He had no reason to mope. He stood up and began to walk toward the castle, when a voice caught him by surprise.

"Harry Potter, you should not be out after dark." It was Firenze. He had walked from behind Hagrid's cabin. "These times are far too dangerous, and you, above all, are wanted dearly."

"It's good to see you too Firenze," Harry said. "Don't your fellow Centaurs want you dead as well?"

"I am still unwelcome," Firenze said, looking back to the Forbidden Forest. "But soon they too will see." He looked to the darkening sky. "The heavens are in motion." He looked back to Harry, and said nothing more. Centaurs never did say much, and Firenze was no exception.

"Well," Harry said feeling the first pangs of hunger, "I've got to be going."

"I believe," Firenze said, "Hagrid is still eating within the castle. If you see him, tell him that I have finished for tonight."

"Finished what?" Harry asked, but Firenze simply bowed his head and trotted around the back of the castle.

When Harry entered the Great Hall, most everyone was done eating. Hagrid and Tonks were the only two professors at the head table. Before sitting to eat, Harry walked over to deliver his message.

"Hello, Harry," Tonks said.

"Hello, Professor's," said Harry with a shiny grin. The words made Hagrid puff out his chest a bit. "Hagrid, I have a message from Firenze. He says he's finished for the night." Hagrid stroked his beard and nodded.

"Very good, very good," he said. "He never tires I tell yeh. Well," Hagrid stood and so did Tonks, "thank yeh Harry. Got teh be goin' now."

"Yes," Tonks added, "I have a few things to prepare as well."

"But what did Firenze finish, Hagrid?" Harry asked.

"Ah, never yeh mind, Harry. Nothin' important." And with that Hagrid and Tonks left the Great Hall.

As Harry sat at the Gryffindor table, Pavarti and Lavender rushed in and sat next to him, oblivious to his presence.

"Five more minutes, Lavender," Pavarti gasped, "and we would have missed dinner!" Then looking at Harry she said, "Oh... Hi, Harry."

"I know, I know," Lavender breathed, "but it was worth it! I told you didn't I?" And then as an afterthought, "Er, Hi, Harry."

"Yes, yes" said Pavarti with excitement. "You were right. Just like clockwork." Plates appeared on the table and the two began to eat. Pavarti took a drink of water and sighed dreamily. "Do you think he noticed?" she asked.

"Centaurs notice everything," Lavender replied. "But who cares." She smiled.

"So," Harry jumped in awkwardly, "what's going on?" The two young women seemed to suddenly notice that Harry was sitting with them, and worse, listening. Indeed, he was trying to put their words together in his mind when Lavender's eyes looked up past Harry.

"Oh! I haven't seen her in ages, Harry," she said. "She's so beautiful, don't you think Pavarti?" Harry looked just in time to hold out his arm and let Hedwig perch. Instantly, his heart began to pound. His fingers trembled as he stroked her feathers looking for any kind of injury, but she was fine. Her feathers were brilliant white, and if anything she looked a bit plumper than when she left. Harry held her close, and when he breathed in, the scent of Gabriella filled his head. Memories of her black hair and black eyes rushed into his mind. Harry kissed Hedwig on the head.

"You're okay?" he asked. Hedwig hooted, and Harry smiled. Suddenly he found his whole body trembling as he looked down to see what, if anything, was on her leg. There was an envelope, and on its face the word Harry. He took the note from Hedwig's leg; she hooted and flew off to the owlery.

"You're wonderful with her," Lavender said. "I can see she loves you too." Harry looked at her, somewhat confused by her words.

"Oh, yeah," he said staring at the folded yellow parchment he'd just removed from the envelope. "She's my best friend I think." Once again, the two girls started to chat with each other, but Harry's mind didn't hear a word. Was this it? Was Gabriella finally going to say their paths had pulled apart? He looked about the Great Hall. There were too many students still eating. He couldn't open this here, not now. He wasn't sure what his reaction would be. He could feel his emotions starting to get away from him. Perspiration was beading on his forehead.

"Harry, are you feeling alright?" Lavender asked. His mouth was dry and he was starting to feel quite hot.

"Erm, I got to go," he said weakly and left the Great Hall. Without thinking he began searching for someplace to unfold the parchment. He walked blindly down one corridor after another, but every alcove, every turn was filled with students. Where had they all come from? He began to descend a flight of stairs. The air was cooler here, and less crowded. He turned left and left again. Finally, he was alone. He sat on a stone bench and slowly unfolded the parchment. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears.


Harry My Love,

Where has the time gone? I wanted to write sooner, but I couldn't. Tonight is my first night home in weeks. Mama was taken seriously ill and was just released from the hospital. Each night I spent alone in the hospital, I stared out the window at the stars thinking of you. At home, I left my window open for Hedwig, free to fly to you, but when I came home tonight she was still here. I must have held her in my arms for an hour wishing she were you. I'm trembling as I write, wondering what you must think of me. I'm so sorry, Harry.

It's awful about your friend being sent to the hospital. I hope he has recovered and I hope you're okay. Mama's doing better, but her mind still seems to wander off on its own at times. Papa's grown thin with worry. I wish so that you were here with me now. I don't know how I'll ever catch up with all the class I've missed at Stonewall, and Mama needs my help at home now more than ever. I don't think I can do it the way we've chosen to live.

Please write back soon and tell me you're okay. I need to know you're okay--my heart has been so worried. And please don't hate me.

I miss you terribly.

Love,

Gabriella

Harry's heart was still pounding as he read the letter for the third time. He was joyous she was okay, and worried about Soseh. He found his fingers again tracing her script. He breathed in the smell of her perfume from the parchment and smiled. There was a rusted creak as a door opened. Too late, he realized he was in the dungeons as Snape emerged from the Potions classroom.

"Oh no," Harry whispered.

Snape took only two steps before realizing Harry was sitting before him. His eyes narrowed and his eyebrows furled in. At first he said nothing, as if turning an apple over in his hand trying to decide where to take the first bite.

"Why are you here, Potter?" Snape asked coolly. Harry folded the letter into his hand.

"No reason," he shrugged. Snape looked up and down the corridor. It was quiet, too quiet. He clearly suspected foul play, but what was it? Harry tried to casually slide the letter into his pocket, but Snape was too sharp to miss the move.

"What is in your hand?" he pressed.

"Nothing," Harry said calmly. Immediately Snape's wand was pointed toward Harry. Pain shot down Harry's right arm. "Accio Parchment!" Snape called. The paper slipped through Harry's fingers. He had no time to reach for his own wand. Ignoring the pain he raised his right hand.

"Incendio!" The letter burst into flames just before it reached Snape's hand. Snape's fingers curled around the flaming paper. He let out a small cry and threw the graying embers to the ground stomping on them. Harry was both nervous about Snape's next move and incensed that he had just burned Gabriella's letter. At first Snape's face was furious.

"Follow me, Potter!" he yelled turning back into the Potions classroom. Harry followed, but as he cautiously entered the classroom he slipped his hand into his robes and held his wand at the ready. Snape opened a cabinet and pulled out a glass jar containing orange paste. "Of all the idiotic..." he muttered to himself. He gently dabbed the paste onto his blistered hand, and then wiped it clean with a dry cloth; the blisters disappeared.

"Sit down!" Snape yelled over his shoulder. He turned leaning back against the cabinet to look at Harry. "Let go of your wand, or you'll be in detention for the rest of the school year." Reluctantly, Harry released his wand, but ensured it protruded ever so slightly from his sleeve.

"I had heard about your new ability Potter," he began. "Burning paper without a wand is," he paused, "notable." Harry, his face scowling, refused to say a word. "You're angry, Potter. Why?" He began to examine Harry again. "What was on the paper?" Harry was silent, and try as he might to stay calm he could feel the anger rising up inside him. All year long he'd been able to remain calm, but for some reason he was loosing control. He didn't want Professor Snape to notice the anger flushing his face, so he turned his back to the professor. "Was it a note," Snape jeered, "from one of your many admirers?" Harry's arm was throbbing, his breath growing heavy. He didn't understand why, but his mind was raging. Snape wanted Gabriella, and Harry couldn't let that happen; he had to protect her. In his thoughts, he began to imagine wrapping his fingers around Snape's neck and squeezing. At that very moment Snape reached for his throat and began to gasp. Harry, his back still turned, took no notice. His mind continued to flame with anger squeezing his fingers more tightly around Snape's windpipe. Snape fell to his knees knocking the jar of orange paste to the floor and shattering the glass. The sound broke Harry's trance and he turned to see what happened.

"Professor!" he called out, truly concerned. Snape began to heave in large breaths of air holding himself steady with the edge of the cabinet. Quickly, Harry ran over to his side. "What's wrong? The potion?" Harry asked, helping Professor Snape to his feet. The sincerity in Harry's voice clashed with Snape's suspicions. "Is it your hand?" Harry asked again, still clueless as to what he'd just done.

"No you fool!" Snape croaked. He planted both his feet and took in another deep breath. Professor Snape shook his head trying to focus his thoughts. "Sit down," he whispered. His voice was regaining its composure. He began to pace toward the front of the classroom and back. He was torn about something, and finally he stopped and stared at Harry. "Dumbledore asked me to pass on this news directly to you," he said through gritted teeth. "There is a plan underway to remove you from the castle." His words were slow and deliberate, and then he added flippantly, "Perhaps to run errands as a farmhand." Snape's eyes narrowed in warning and then became impassive. "That is all, you may go." He turned and flicked his wand cleaning the broken glass off the floor.

"What?" Harry squawked. "Is that it?" He was dumbfounded, first that he would hear any news of plans, second that the news would come from Snape, and finally that it would be so bloody vague. "That's all you can tell me, or all you will tell me?" It was Harry's voice that was now cool. Snape shut the cabinet door and looked at Harry.

"You'll repeat nothing that was said here tonight, Potter; not to a student, not to a professor... any professor. Dumbledore is consumed with your protection, and the Dark Lord is consumed with your destruction." Snape shook his head. "Why, I have no idea. It will be the downfall of one, or the other, I'm sure of it," he spat. "Please, don't let your ego kill another of the Order this year." His words slithered out his tongue and fell on the floor like so many snakes. Harry clenched his fists.

"I said," Snape spoke sharply, "you may go." He flicked his wand and the iron door to the dungeon flung open.

Snape's words stabbed Harry's heart. Forcing himself to remain calm, Harry slowly turned and walked out. He began to tremble with anger as he passed through the heavy iron doors when, suddenly, they slammed themselves shut, reverberating down the empty corridor, and shaking mortar from between the stone walls into a fine dust cloud that filled the Potions room in his absence. As he began to stride down the corridor back to the Gryffindor common room, he could hear with satisfaction Professor Snape choking on the dust-filled air. It would take some time before those doors would open again.


Author notes: The scene with Cho flying over the lake was actually written before I saw the Prisoner of Azkaban movie. When I watched Harry pass over the lake on Buckbeak, my teeth nearly fell out of my mouth. It was the same vision.