Pureblood Academy Host Club

Neither do I own Ouran High School Host club nor do I profit from the idea. This is a crossover so many things had to be changed in order to accommodate the idea.

The concept may come across as strange at first, but you'll grow accustomed to it as we go on. In the fandom, there are a grand many ships involving Draco, and I feel its always safe to explore all categories; therefore the main character who is obviously Harry has Hermione-like traits as well. Strange? Yes, well you'll understand by the end of this chapter.

Pureblood Academy Host Club

Chapter 1 The Host Club is Now Open

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The sun shone brightly on the main clock tower of Pureblood Academy. It was currently three o'clock in the afternoon and classes had ended for the day. Crowds of young rich boys and girls chatted noisily in the classrooms, courtyards, gardens, and the Great Hall.

Even in the library, there seemed a concentration of students walking about, laughing and talking. There was a distinct lofty atmosphere in the air in which no one really cared for studying or anything particularly academic.

It is upon this supposition that one would turn his gaze upon one soul whose concentration is not immersed in socialization. A pair of large round glasses under a shock of untidy black hair wearing a baggy jumper and jeans was what made this figure seem almost unfitting with the shiny, cheerful scene in the room.

The forlorn character peeked through a thin crack in the door. People crowded the room and all the tables were occupied. As the little figure sighed, it closed the door with its head hung low.

Mumbling to itself, it ascended the stairs. "There are like four reading rooms, but why is it so noisy?" it murmured bitterly.

The hallway seemed quiet enough, and there was almost a lonely air as the figure sulked its way through. Sunlight streamed in streaks onto the stone floor, and the figure turned to face the window with another such sigh.

I need to get my homework done. There's hardly a place to study anywhere in this school. The quiet figure wandered up the hall and approached another door. The sign on the front read Third Music Room. "An unused music room? I guess this is the only place I can do my homework quietly." The figure's hand reached out to the door handle and turned.

It was like a flash of bright light as the words "Welcome!" rang out. As the light receded, a picture swam into vision. Beside a large blue vase, a tall, black-haired young man with bright, cruel eyes stood with his arms folded; on one side stood two identical twins with red hair, and on the other side stood a little boy with mousey brown hair, and wide caramel eyes clutching a pink bunny and leaning against an even taller brown-haired fellow with narrow eyes. Between them all, in a chair, sat an elegant young man with white blonde hair and bright grey eyes.

The young figure at the door, having abruptly entered, backed away quickly into the door, staring at the familiar men before it.

The blonde one with a smirk gestured with an extravagant wave of his hand. "Pureblood Academy is defined by, one, pureblood, prestigious families and two, wealth...and as you might know, prosperous people have quite a bit of time on their hands. Therefore, this...our Pureblood Host Club is about these wonderfully handsome young men who have just as much time to give hospitality to these lovely ladies with time, and we profit off them. T'is an elegant game unique to this super-rich school.

"H-h-h-host club?" A splutter rose up from the little figure.

The two twins leaned forward and squinted at the little figure. "What? It's a guy?" they muttered in something like disappointment.

The black-haired one turned to the twins with a shrewd look. "Fred, George, you two are in the same class as our guest, are you not?"

They both simultaneously grimaced. "Yeah, but, he doesn't get along with anyone else well, so we hardly know him."

His shrewd glance turned into something of a smirk as he blinked carefully at the young figure. "That's a little rude actually," he said to the twins before turning back. "Welcome to the Pureblood host club, special student." He nodded as the twins looked at him incredulously.

The blonde one suddenly jumped up in surprise. He turned and gazed in awe at their guest. "So he's that exceptionally special student, Harry Potter?"

The little figure that appeared to be called Harry turned and began struggling with the door, which had suddenly decided to lock. There was a pause and Harry looked up. "How did you...?"

The black-haired one sighed lightly. "Well, the way our school works makes it hard for commoners to get in."

Harry looked at him with something like incredulity. There was a distinct feeling that suddenly the words "commoner" had been pinned on his forehead.

Ignoring Harry's reaction, the black-haired young man went on, "They say it's pretty hard to be accepted as a special student unless you are a bookworm of some kind."

Harry frowned. The word bookworm attached itself to the word commoner. "Ah...thanks," came Harry's murmur.

Abruptly, the tall blonde one's hand came down on Harry's shoulder. "Yes, in other words, you are a hero, Potter! Even if you are the number one student in your class, you must be the poorest student in the whole school!"

Harry twisted out his grasp and sidled away. The blonde one merely followed, continuing his rant, "Others might marginalize you as a lowly civilian."

Harry shot him a look. "You know it's not as dramatic as you make it sound." He moved still further away as he noticed how close the blonde one had become once more.

"Come on," he cried, "why not?! All hail poverty!" And he seemed to sparkle in his sudden excitement. "Welcome to our elegant world, pauper!"

Harry, in the effort to be polite, turned away to struggle with the door again.

Suddenly the littlest one with a cry of delight grabbed Harry's arm. "Hey, Hawwy," he cried, with surprising sincerity. "You're really a hero? That's awesome!"

"A special student, not a hero," Harry replied glumly, but suddenly cried, "AND WHO ARE YOU CALLING HAWWY!?" whereas the little boy quailed and ran for cover against the tall brown-haired guy.

Harry, seething with rising rage, was quiet a moment enough to hear the taller blonde murmur, "Strange, who would have expected the famous special student to be gay?"

Harry paused once more. "Gay?"

The blonde one stood, leaned against the near wall reflectively. "So...which type do you prefer?"

"What?" Harry countered.

A gesture was made vaguely in the direction of the extremely tall brown-haired fellow. "The taciturn, brooding type?" Then he gestured at the wide-eyed, mousey-haired boy with the pink bunny- "the young, innocent type?" He then pointed at the two smirking twins- "the mischievous devil type?" and he then waved his hand at the black-haired one- "or the cool calculating type?"

Harry stared for the longest time. "N-No!" he spluttered. "I just needed a place to do my homework..." He began to back away again in another direction.

The blonde one stepped forward sinuously and ran his finger lightly against Harry's cheek. "Or how about you try me? Wanna go?"

It seemed Harry's capacity for this kind of behaviour was very low as he jumped back about a foot. The blonde fellow watched in puzzlement as Harry stumbled and stepped straight into the tall blue vase. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as Harry gasped and turned to see it toppling over. He cried out and reached out to catch it, the vase slipped off its stand and Harry's fingers brushed the handle.

The crash shattered the room into silence.

Harry stared at the pieces on the floor, mouth agape.

"Ahh," said one of the twins. "The Rene's flower vase. It was the main target of our in-school auction."

"That's not good," said the other. "And we thought we could have reaped up to sixty-five thousand pounds off this."

"Sixty-five thousand pounds??!!" Harry shrieked.

There was a cold silence as they all blinked at Harry.

"Um," he muttered, looking at the twins. "...about paying for this..."

The twins smirked. "Are you even able to?" They looked at each other. "Someone who can't even buy our designated uniform."

Harry began to sweat, staring at them.

"Besides," the twins continued, "what's with that stupid outfit?" eyeing Harry's jumper and crumpled jeans.

The black-haired one with the cruel eyes stooped and picked up a shard of the broken vase. As he straightened, his eyes narrowed. "What should we do about this, Draco?"

Harry looked around apprehensively.

The blonde one sat in his original chair abruptly. He took his time in folding his legs and resting his chin in one hand. "Have you heard of this saying, Potter? 'When in Rome, do as Romans do'-" Here he pointed at Harry while not looking at him. "If you don't have the money, work it off. Starting today, you're...the host club's dog."

Harry froze suddenly, looking forlorn once more. "D-dog?" The others crowded around him, marvelling at the sudden frozen state he was in.

This is terrible, he was thinking. I have been assimilated into this ridiculous host club...

The little one reached out and poked him. "Poke poke," he said in dulcet tones.

Harry fell over.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Laughter and chit-chat fluttered about the room. Girls in pale yellow frocks sat in sofas and chairs as tea and cake was served.

"What types of music do you like, Draco?" A girl with brown pigtails whispered, addressing the tall blonde boy.

Draco turned to her, his eyes smouldering. "Of course, it is the songs we share in our memories."

She beamed, blushing. "I baked you some cake today...could you try it?"

Draco moved quickly and gathered the girl close to him, resting his finger lightly on her chin. "If you would let me eat it...." he replied softly, gazing earnestly into her eyes.

The girl blushed to her roots. "Oh, Draco...that's...."

"Draco Malfoy, I have heard about it...." broke in another voice.

Draco turned, facing the girl behind him. She was tall with a slow smile and auburn hair. "Sorry?" he said.

"-that you have taken in a little stray cat," she continued, setting down her tea cup and giving Draco a side-long glance.

He smiled. "I wouldn't call him a little cat, but rather...."

It was just then the shock of untidy black hair was seen entering the room.

"Ah, speak of the devil!" He waved at Harry. "Little piggy, well done on your errand. Did you buy the correct items?"

Harry paused in his tracks to give Malfoy a blank look. "P-piggy?" He then chose to ignore the remark and handed Draco a package.

"What's this then?" Draco asked as he scrutinized the package labelled Nescafe.

"Coffee, as you can plainly see," Harry replied through his teeth.

"I've never seen this maker before," Draco replied. "Is this the ones where it's already ground?"

"No, it's instant coffee."

Everyone stared in puzzlement and wonder.

"Instant?" the girls echoed.

Draco suddenly looked excited as he grasped the package. "Oohh! This is the type where all you need to do is put hot water in it? The so-called commoner coffee!"

"Oh my," one girl cried, "so that's the famous...."

Another girl sat up. "So it is true that poor people use this since they cannot grind coffee nuts with the little time they have."

All of them nodded, still gazing shamelessly at the package in Draco's hands.

"Commoners wisdom, I see," the black-haired fellow noted now listening in on the conversation.

"Ten pounds for a hundred grams, huh?" one of the twins mused.

"What an extraordinary price," exclaimed the other.

Harry, who was watching all this incredulously, cried, "If you want, I'll go buy another! Sorry, I didn't buy anything to your standards!"

Draco threw up his hand dramatically. "No...wait...." And as they all gasped, he stood up, holding the package high. "I shall try this."

Everyone jumped up in awe and stared admiringly at him. He stared off into the distance and cried, "Yes, I am not afraid! I shall try this!"

Harry was almost not surprised when the room broke out into applause and gasps of admiration.

Draco waved his pale hand at their applause. "All right, Harry; come over here and make us some commoner coffee."

Harry stared at him as the crowd dispersed to the table in the corner leaving him alone by the sofa.

"Draco is playing around too much," said a voice, and Harry looked down to find a tall girl with auburn hair seated calmly with her tea. "There is no way such a personal favourite coffee bought by a lowly half-blood would suit his taste."

"Huh?" Harry murmured at her.

She inclined her head haughtily at him. "Excuse me, I was talking to myself," she replied, smiling a slow smile.

Harry blinked at her for a moment, but Malfoy had started to call again and he hurried off.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Harry couldn't help feeling unnerved at the prospect of performing a simple task as making instant coffee for a group of people as they watched in an obscene amount of interest.

He poured the water in each cup and stirred quickly. "Coffee's done," he muttered, glaring at Malfoy.

Draco smiled a bright smile causing the vicinity to light up a little. This phenomenon seemed to fascinate Harry a little. "Now then, let's enjoy...."

"I feel a little bit scared drinking this," said a girl with a long plait down her back.

"Father might scold me if I drink this kind of beverage..." another broke out wistfully.

Draco came around the table quickly and grasped the girl's cheeks in his palms. His eyes stationed piercingly on hers. "Would you drink it from...my lips?"

There was silence as all the girls watched with bated breath at Malfoy's amazing romantic flair.

"I would," replied the girl solemnly and the other girls couldn't contain their squeals of delight.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Ha ha," one of the twins laughed, sitting across from a couple of girls, "and then, he said he woke up shocked from a nightmare!" He laughed again, gesturing at his brother beside him

The other twin suddenly bit his lip and looked away with a blush. "George!" he cried. "Speaking of that...in front of others is so mean."

George sat up. "Fred..." he murmured.

The girls across the table clasped each other's hands, watching the scene with renewed interest.

George reached out and grasped his brother's arm and leaned close to him. "I am so sorry, Fred. You just looked so beautiful in your fear right then. I just..." he broke off dramatically.

"Oh, George," Fred mumbled.

The two girls, red-faced and teary, started to squeal with glee. "Twin-cest!!!" they cried.

"I just adore boy love!" squealed one of them.

Harry watched this in passing, his mind swirling with confusion. "I don't get this..."

It was just then that the tall brown-haired guy entered with the littlest one on piggy back. "Sorry, everyone," said the little one, "I'm late."

One girl seated in sofa turned. "Colin honey! Theodore Nott!"

"We waited so long," cried another.

The tall one set the little one down with ease, as he rubbed his eyes sleepily. "Sorry!" His little voice seemed laced with cuteness. "I fell asleep while waiting for Teddy to finish his kendo club."

Theodore bowed silently before sitting down. Colin continued to rub his eyes, tears from sleep making his wide honey eyes glitter. "I'm still a bit sleepy," he sighed.

The girls watched him with their lips pressed tight together in some form of suppressed feeling. "He's sooo cute!!!" one cried and soon their corner was filled with cries of agreement.

Harry observed this quietly from afar. "Is he really a senior?"

Suddenly, the black-haired one stepped up from behind Harry, his low quiet voice surprising him. "Do not be fooled by Colin Creevey's appearance; he is actually a brilliant student. While Theodore's selling point is his taciturnity."

"Ahh," Harry replied blankly.

"Hawwy!" Colin cried, bounding forward. He grasped Harry's hand and spun him around. "Wanna eat cake with us, Hawwy?"

Harry's head was still spinning, but he managed. "No, I don't really like sweets that much..."

Colin looked appealingly up at him. "Then...I'll lend you my bunny!" Here he held up the pink rabbit he was always carting around with him.

Harry frowned, flattening his hair. "No, I don't really like bunnies either..."

Colin looked worried, glancing down at his stuffed toy. "You don't like my bunny?"

Harry blinked down at it. His mouth pursed, then after a moment he burst out, "Actually, it's really cute!"

There was a pause as Colin squinted up at him, a look of rising realisation on his face. His mouth fell open and then he closed it and smiled. "All right, take good care of it then!" And he was off.

The black-haired one, who had been watching this with a slightly amused tilt to his mouth, spoke, "Our club utilizes everyone's unique trait...as our policy is to satisfy our customer's needs. By the way, Malfoy is our number one host-our king, rather. Seventy percent of our customers designate him as their host."

"This is secretly what hell is like, isn't it?" Harry muttered so the guy wouldn't hear.

"By the way, your debt being sixty-five thousand pounds, you'll probably be the club's dog until graduation. Ah, apologies. You'll basically be in charge of trivial chores. You are, of course, free to run away..."

Harry stared at him.

"...but my family has around a hundred talented private police." Here he narrowed his eyes at Harry. "Do you...hold a passport?"

"Wha..." Harry murmured, staring up at him in awe. "Who exactly are you?"

"I am from the Riddle family. Tom Marvolo Riddle."

As Harry squinted up at him in shock, Draco sauntered by. "That's right," he said, as if continuing a conversation. "Work like a dog, eh? Mr. Pathetic." He blew in Harry's ear and Harry jumped another foot or so away.

"Would you knock it off?" Harry cried.

Draco put his hands in his pockets in the effort at a careless gesture. "I am only making a point. You won't be popular with the ladies if you're so pathetic."

Harry gave him an odd look. "I'm really not interested."

Draco's look of shock was almost comical. "What are you saying?!" He stood up straight and it was evident he was about to start off on one of his long rants. "It is a very important issue. A good man making women happy is everything!" And once more he managed to light up his surroundings with a profound looks of beautiful sorrow.

"It doesn't really matter, does it?" replied Harry, and Draco's glitter faded.

"Men, women, or looks...it's what's inside that matter for a person. It completely eludes me as to why this club exists."

Draco's tone suddenly implied heartbrokenness. "It's such a cruel thing...God sometimes creates perfect beings with perfect insides and outsides." Malfoy suddenly hugged himself and Harry knew precisely whom he was referring to. "I can understand why you might use such rationalities to console yourself. Anyway, how would you be able to live without doing that? Yet, you must think about this carefully," he began, gesticulating with perfect grace and Harry was struck with a sudden thought. As Draco began to rant on and on about placing one's pinkie underneath the glass when setting it down and fixing one's hair to curl to the left and dabbing one's lips lightly with a handkerchief, Harry thought.

"What word do you use for these types of people..." he mused quietly, "...let's see...let's see... what was it..."

The twins in passing noticed the conversation and stood by to listen.

"Troublesome...no, that's not the word...there was something more accurate for a person like him..."

"...Finally, at the best moment," Draco concluded, walking over to stand beside Harry with a very striking pose of grace in which he knelt so that he was eye to eye with Harry. "...a look for the lower angle is very effective..."

Harry didn't know what he was talking about, but it had just struck him. The word! "I've got it!"

"What," asked Draco, "did I just make your heart pump a little faster?"

"You're an obnoxious bastard of a git," Harry replied in awe of his realisation.

The look on Malfoy's face was priceless and he slowly, very slowly wandered into a corner to sulk.

The twins burst out laughing, resting their elbows on Harry's head. "Well, you are a hero, after all."

Harry looked at the sight of Malfoy's sulk in which his head was slung low and his fists were clenched in a form of anguish. Harry suddenly felt very bad. "He's so sensitive....erm...sorry, Malfoy; I should have said...I actually was a bit touched."

Draco jumped up, smile back on and grace at high volume. "I see! I see! Then let me teach you more techniques!"

They all gazed at him in wonder.

"He really recovered fast..." Harry muttered.

"My lord...." said one of the twins blankly.

"Call me 'king'," prompted Malfoy.

"...even if you taught him the basics of being a host," the twin continued, ignoring that last statement.

"...in his case, he doesn't even pass for the most basic visual criteria, right?" the other twin went on. "We mean, for this type...even if you take off the glasses..." Here he stepped around Harry and gently removed Harry's spectacles. "...his eyes will probably appear even small-" The twin paused, a look of shock written on his face as he looked deep into Harry's eyes.

"Wait! I don't have any contacts!" cried Harry helplessly.

The other twin came around for a look and his features also twisted into a look of sharp surprise. Colin, Theodore, and Tom stepped forward as well, and gasps flowed from their direction as they looked. Malfoy suddenly pushed the twins aside and gazed down at Harry in shock. A gasp broke out from his lips and he looked away sharply. His fingers rose up and he snapped.

"Fred! George!" he ordered.

"Sir!" they replied, and promptly grabbed Harry by the wrists and dragged him easily from the room at a ridiculous speed.

Draco pointed speedily at Tom. "Tom, you call the hairdresser!"

Tom was already dialling.

Draco's finger rested on Theodore. "Teddy, get us some contacts from the nurse!" and Theodore rushed off at a concentrated sprint.

Colin jumped into the line of vision, his cheeks pink with anticipation. "Draco, what about me?"

"Colin honey, you..." There was a short pause.

"Yeah?"

"Eat the cakes, please," Draco dismissed him and promptly walked out as Colin sulked at a table, poking his cake with a fork and muttering mutinously.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Okay," the twins said, holding up a powder blue suit with the school crest on it. They were crowded into a dressing room and Harry was backing away. "Put this on!"

"What?!" Harry cried.

"No questions!" they shouted right back, pouncing on Harry.

There was a sudden scuffle behind the curtain, in which Harry cried in high tones, "OK, OK, I'll wear it!"

There was a further struggle and Harry this time nearly screamed, "Both of you, get out!" and Fred and George emerged from within, stumbling for a moment. Once they had righted themselves, they looked back at the curtains and then at each other as looks of dawning comprehension filled their faces.

"Oh..." they both muttered.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Colin had finished eating six plates of cake and was looking extremely satisfied as he sat outside the curtains with the rest of them.

Suddenly, Harry's voice emerged from behind the curtains. "Erm...Malfoy?"

"What? You're done?"

The curtains were pushed aside and Harry stood there, bright, soulful green eyes staring out at them, his once untidy hair gelled into a much more neat style and his baggy clothes replaced with the school boy's uniform of powder blue with a black necktie. "Is it OK for me to wear this uniform?"

Draco appeared as if he was going to cry. The fact of the matter was he had tears streaming down his cheeks at will. "You look so cute!! You almost look like a girl!" he cried.

"Hawwy, that's so adorable!" Colin cried.

"If you were so good looking," one of the twins sighed. "Why didn't you say so earlier, eh?"

"He might get customers like this," Tom mused.

Draco jumped up. "Yes, just as I predicted."

One of the twins coughed and it sounded a bit like the word, "Liar."

"You have graduated from trivial chores!" Draco continued, pointing at Harry. "Starting today, you are an official member of the Pureblood Host Club! I will personally train you into a first-class host. If you gather a hundred customers that designate you, your sixty-five thousand pound debt will be gone."

"A host?" Harry breathed disbelievingly.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Harry love, what are your hobbies?"

"Do you take care of your skin in some special way?"

"It's so beautiful..."

Harry blinked at the girls around the table in puzzlement. It's...over...my life is officially over. I have no clue what to do...

"Why did you join this club, Harry love?" they all asked simultaneously.

Harry felt tempted to run away and forget all this. However, reason seemed to reign. That's right. If I gather a hundred customers that designate me...then my sixty-five thousand pound debt is gone. That was the deal and I have to pull through.

Draco seemed to want to get a good look at how Harry was doing as he sneakily sneaked nearby. The girls and Harry seemed to be getting on well enough...

"Oh my...your parents passed away when you were little? You live with your godfather. What about house chores, then?" a girl was saying sympathetically.

"Ah, I do those myself. My mum was very skilled at cooking. She left me a lot of recipes." Here Harry got a very distant sad look on his face and all three girls leaned forward in interest. "It was very fun to learn them one by one..."

Draco leaned forward in his seat behind Harry, his expression tragic.

"...and my godfather would be very happy on days that I cook them properly." Harry looked down and blushed. "I really love those times."

All the girls seemed to have hearts dancing in their eyes as they looked at Harry. "Erm..." one of them said, "could we...designate you tomorrow as well?" The two others nodded vigorously.

"Ah, that'd help me out a lot," Harry replied happily.

The other host members were watching this closely. "They're accepting him very easily," one of the twins muttered.

"A complete natural..." was the other twin's remark.

"He doesn't need your techniques..." they both said in the listening Draco's direction.

"Malfoy," a voice broke out, and Draco turned to face his regular designation: the auburn haired girl with the slow smile. "Ahh! Forgive me, my princess...I was just concerned about our kid there."

Her smile was very cold. "You seem to have an eye on that person a lot..."

Draco's smile was gracious. "Of course, I am raising him like my child..." The other girls laughed at this as he snapped his fingers and beckoned to Harry. "Come here for a bit, Harry."

Harry got up and walked over to their corner. "Yeah?"

Draco nodded towards the auburn haired girl. "Give your salutations," he breezed, "to my customer, Princess Pansy."

It's that girl from before...Harry managed a smile. "Pleased to meet you," he said sheepishly.

Malfoy's eyes widened at this and he jumped up, grasping Harry to his chest. "That was so cute, Harry! The shy looking smile was brilliant! Brilliant! Tres Bien!" Here he began to spin Harry around in rapid circles. "I can't get enough of your cuteness!"

"Er...Draco?" Pansy entreated fruitlessly.

Harry, in a helpless state and locked in Malfoy's strong and unbreakable hold, caught Theodore's eye. "Teddy! Teddy, help me please!" he shrieked over Draco's cries of, "I'm not letting go; I'm not letting go!"

Theodore's eyes, which watched impassively at first, suddenly narrowed and within seconds he was out of his seat beside Colin and there was a ringing silence as Theodore swept Harry from Draco. It was as he raised Harry above Draco's reach that a slight blush rose in Theodore's cheeks as it seemed something occurred to him when he looked at Harry.

There was a ringing silence as everyone looked. Theodore's height compared to Harry's was quite impressive and impressive more so was how he had managed to hold him so high up.

"Teddy, you didn't have to go that far..." Draco stammered. "Come on, Harry; come back to Papa's arms!"

"I don't need two fathers!" Harry cried from his position above Draco's head. In their argument, Draco did not spot Pansy watching, her mouth set in a bitter line.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Harry walked into his classroom to his seat and looked at his desk. "Where'd my bag go?" he murmured, looking around. He absently turned and looked out the wide windows. "Oh no!"

The pond in the middle of the back courtyard was beautiful with its lily pads and blossoms trailing about. However, this was not what had caught poor Harry's eye. There, in the middle of the dreamy green water, floated all of Harry's books and his bag. "I didn't think there would be anyone bullying me here..." he whispered, before turning on his heel to run downstairs before the host club opened.

As he sprinted down the hallway, he passed Pansy Parkinson. She eyed him as he ran right by her in the hallway.

"Ah, you..." she called, and Harry stopped in his tracks. "You now look tidy thanks to Draco, huh? Perhaps you should fix your ill-bred nature too," she snapped quickly and turned on her heel and stalked off.

Harry stood very still, watching her walk away.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Well, I'm pretty sure Pansy was the culprit...anyway, I need to find my wallet," he huffed, as his hands groped blindly through the murky water. "Or I won't have money for dinner tonight."

"Hey, commoner!" called a voice from behind, and Harry turned to look at Draco Malfoy, hands in his pockets and frowning. "You've got a hell of a lot of guts to be skipping out on the club activities," he went on. He looked around haughtily and spotted Harry's bag on the ground soaked through. "And why are you washing your bag?"

"I dropped it by accident," Harry replied curtly, bending down again to search through the water. "I can't find my lunch money for this week."

Draco looked puzzled.

Harry chose to ignore him and continued searching. He heard splashing footsteps behind him and was horrified to notice that Draco had stepped into the water with him. He turned and Draco was feeling under the water for the wallet with a blank expression on his face.

"Don't! You'll just get wet!" he cried.

Draco shrugged, his profile to Harry's vision. "It's not such a bad thing, getting wet. As they say, 'handsome men can't be hurt by water'."

Harry noticed how Draco's pale blonde hair seemed to glint in the sun. His bright, grey eyes swam with concentration as he swept his hands back and forth beneath the water. "Ah," he cried suddenly, straightening.

Harry watched him.

"Is this what you're looking for?" he inquired, smugly brandishing a small wallet. He splashed casually through the water and stepped right up to Harry, who was still looking at him blankly. "What's up? You're daydreaming, you know?" A bright smirk flitted over his features. "Oh! Have you fallen for me?"

Harry quickly swept the wallet out of Draco's hold. "You wish!"

Draco shrugged. "It doesn't make sense. Why were your things in the middle of the pond?" His expression was now shrewd.

Harry blushed. "Erm...I dropped them out of the window...."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Pansy gave a sigh of cold sympathy. "Oh, that must have been unfortunate..." She stopped and took a sip of her tea. "But the bag couldn't very well have fallen into the pond by itself..."

Why on earth did this girl designate me? thought Harry, sitting across from her at a small table. He set his tea cup down carefully and looked her in the eye.

"However, in order to pick up your filthy bag, you bothered Draco's precious hands for it. You really don't know your place, do you?" Her tone was hateful and bitter. "Draco is only interested in you because your background is different and unique."

"Wha-?"

"Never mistake it for him actually adoring you as a person."

Harry frowned. "So basically what this is, all of it, is you being jealous."

Pansy's features assembled themselves in shock before her eyes narrowed. There was a quick movement as Harry felt a pain in his leg when her foot connected with it. Harry jumped up and the small table was overturned along with all the tea things. He tripped over the table leg and landed on top of Pansy, who screamed with enthusiasm.

"Help! Harry....Harry is behaving obscenely! He suddenly got violent! Someone help me quick! Get this commoner off-" Her words were quickly cut off as a splash of water was swiftly poured down on the both of them. There was a silent pause as the water seeped in through Harry's clothing and dripped down his face.

Pansy looked up at the twins, who were each holding an empty pitcher with identical expressions of disgust. Harry straightened from kneeling above her and looked up at them.

"Wh-what are you two doing?" she asked incredulously.

Draco stepped forward, his features quite stern. He reached out and took Pansy's hand to help her up. As his hand rested softly on her cheek, Pansy turned to him and burst out, "Draco love, Harry wanted to-"

"How graceless," he cut in, his tone very cold. "For a young woman of pure wizard's blood and high birth to stoop to casting someone's bag into a pond."

Harry blinked up at him from the floor. How did he know?

"How could you-" Pansy spluttered. "Have you any proof?!"

Draco's hand still rested on Pansy's cheek. His eyes were glittering. "You are quite beautiful...but you are not fit to be our customer. I know Harry's really not that kind of fellow."

Pansy's eyes narrowed finally and her jaw was clenched. "Draco Malfoy," she spat. "You fool!"

And with that, she ran from the room, all eyes trailing after her.

Draco stretched with a little groan of satisfaction. His eyes came to rest on Harry still sitting on the floor, looking up at him. "And as for you," he went on haughtily. "I shall inform you of the punishment for causing such a ruckus. Now you are expected to attract a thousand customers!"

"What?!" Harry exclaimed. He looked slightly gob smacked. "A...thousand...?"

Draco held out his hand for Harry to take. "Here," he said softly, and as Harry took his hand and he helped him up, Draco smirked. "I'm looking forward to your progress, natural rookie." He winked.

Tom suddenly stepped forward, clipboard in hand and clutching package in the other. "This is our only replacement uniform. I suppose it might be better than remaining in such a state," he stated, offering the package.

Harry looked down sheepishly at the package as he took it. "Thanks...a lot."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Once more, Harry stepped behind the curtain in the back room and tore open the package. He looked at its contents and sighed. "Well, best get dressed then."

Moments passed, when Draco and Tom both entered the back room. Tom seemed to remember something and opened up his clipboard quickly, rifling through some papers.

"Harry, here," Draco called, pulling back the curtain. "I brought a towel for you..." He stared at Harry, and Harry blinked back.

Harry was wearing what was obviously a brassiere, and it seemed to fit just so. The curtain quickly fell back in front of Draco as he stared blankly at it.

A look of dawning comprehension lit up Draco's face and he still stared blankly at the curtain. Calculating what he had just seen. "Harry..." he said.

"Yeah?" replied Harry from inside the changing room.

"Erm...you're a girl?"

"Biologically, yeah..." was the reply.

There were a few more minutes as Draco seemed completely dumbstruck. "Your...name's Harry, though."

Tom stepped up from behind, not looking in the least surprised. He was looking down at his clipboard. "Actually, her full name is Hermione Jane Potter. People call her Harry because most have problems pronouncing such a strange name."

Draco gazed in a glazed manner at Tom. "You knew?!"

Tom opened his mouth to grace this statement with a reply when the rest of the host club entered the back room. They took one look at Draco, whose eyes were wide and mouth was slack.

"What happened to him?" one of the twins inquired politely in Tom's direction.

Tom turned; his expression impassive. "Draco just figured out that Harry's a girl."

"Only just now?" the other twin cried.

"They knew too?!!" Draco almost screamed.

"We realised it throughout the day," Colin replied sweetly.

"Seeing as how I have files on almost every student....I knew from the beginning," Tom breezed.

The curtain was swept back and Harry stood there, dressed in the female Pureblood uniform. Pale yellow dress now accentuating what was not so obvious in male attire.

Draco grabbed at his hair in both shock and frustration. "Why the hell didn't you saying anything?" he shot at her.

Harry shrugged. "I thought it was fine if a bunch of older students took me for a guy. It's always been this way. My features are a little bit neutral. Never really cared...."

Draco seemed torn between shaking in spasms and crying.

Tom folded his arms. "It did turn into an interesting turn of events, now didn't it?" he said more to himself than anyone else.

Harry gave Draco a good natured smile. "Anyway, you were really cool back there in the music room with how you dealt with Pansy, Draco."

Draco stopped shaking and whirled around on Harry. He folded one arm over his chest and the other arm rested there as his hand covered his face. The rest of them noticed that Draco's usually pale skin colour had gone quite pink suddenly as he hid behind his hand.

Tom smirked to himself. "Perhaps this is the start of some twisted type of romance..."

Hermione or Harry, who had barely noted Draco's reaction, looked up musingly. "I suppose it's not that bad being a host and entertaining other women."

Draco turned blue this time and the other host members stared at her.

Harry gave a little giggle to herself. "Maybe I should start addressing you all as 'mate'." She laughed again then, her eyes shining.

The host club is now open.