Harry Potter and the Goblet of Firewhiskey

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Firewhiskey

By Aerie22

Chapter Two

Long Day's Journey Into Night

* * *

"I wish you had let me drive," Harry complained. "I've got my own Firebolt, or didn't you notice."

Tonks sighed and looked to her left. On the far handle of the catamaran-like broom, Harry sat there sulking.

"Come on, Harry," she said in exasperation. "We had to take your trunk, your broom, your owl, your Wizard card collection, the hovering skateboard, the 42 pounds of rock cakes Hagrid sent you, that huge stack of Gentleman Wizard magazines--oh, and don't listen to Lupin. That is not me in the centerfold of the February 1995 issue," she said in a strangled tone.

Harry nodded. "Must have been some other Nymphadora Tonks," he said, vowing to take a closer look at that issue...for the articles, of course. Or, at least he had heard there were articles in Gentleman Wizard magazine. He would have to check as soon as possible. Especially the February 1995 issue.

He continued to sulk as he glared over his trunk, which was riding on the middle handle of the broom.

"Come on, Harry. It's the latest thing. An S.U.B. A Sports Utility Broom! I think it's great. And I love the size of it. Can you imagine if we ever hit a Comet Two-Sixty with this thing? Toothpicks!"

As the sun slowly faded, they were able finally to come out of the clouds without risk of being seen. Harry looked down at the beautiful vista below, with lights sparkling as far as the eye could see. It was a spectacular sight, seeing the rows of arrow-straight boulevards that seemed to radiate from one central location.

He smiled at the wonder of it all. All those lights. All those people. All those individual hopes and dreams. All that...Eiffel Tower?

"Uhhhhh....Tonks?"

Tonks turned her head slowly toward Harry with a blissful, mesmerized look on her face, the wind washing over her spiky hair like...uhhh...the wind washing over spiky hair. "Yes, Harry?" she said languidly.

"Uhhhhh...where are we going?"

Tonks smiled indulgently. "Why London, of course."

Harry blinked. He pondered this information carefully. "Wouldn't it have been faster if we had taken, say, a left turn at Lambeth, or even Bromley, rather than continue on straight for several hours?"

Tonks blinked a couple times and looked down. "Hmmm...you mean that isn't Cleopatra's Needle down there?"

"Nope," Harry replied.

Tonks screwed up her face in a frown, which was a truly awesome sight as she, being a shape shifter, literally screwed up her face into a frown. "Damned anti-histamines. Damned allergies," she muttered. "Don't ever snort Floo Powder, Harry."

After turning around and spending the next four hours in the air, stopping two witches and one wizard in mid-air for directions along the way (which Harry objected to, arguing he could find his own way, thank you very much), the two finally found their way up the Thames as the sun began peeking over the horizon.

After another 15 minutes, Tonks insisted that he take his seat, fasten his seat belt, and disconnect all portable electronic devices. Harry frowned and looked down. He recognized they were now over London. And he was surprised to recognize the area. With Sirius hiding behind the VEIL OF DOOM!!! [or whatever the hell else that thing was], he didn't figure they would be returning to Number 12 Grimauld Place.

He cleared his throat. "With Sirius hiding behind the VEIL OF DOOM!!! [or whatever the hell else that thing was], we aren't returning to Number 12 Grimauld Place, are we?" he asked.

Tonks looked over at Harry. "Well, it's changed a lot. Once Sirius hid behind the VEIL OF DOOM!!! [or whatever the hell else that thing was], his executors sold off Number 12 Grimauld Place to developers, who built a luxury high-rise on the property--the Grimauld Arms."

"Oh," said Harry, thinking that the name reminded him of getting hugged by his Aunt Marge.

"Oh, but we are going back there," Tonks said brightly. "You see, we have the entire 13th Floor. Of course, the developers, being superstitious over the prospect that there might actually be prospective tenants who might be superstitious and not want to live on a 13th floor, designed the place to go from the 12th to the 14th floor. A couple of payoffs to the contractor and we got a real 13th floor. It's just invisible to the Muggles."

Harry stared at her. "And that works?"

Tonks shrugged. "Nobody's noticed so far. The only problems we've had are all these people on the 12th floor complaining about the wild parties thrown by the people upstairs and the people on the 14th floor complaining about the wild parties being..."

"I get the picture," Harry said.

As Harry looked down, he recognized the neighborhood, except for the 20-story condo. There was a sudden flash coming from the invisible 13the floor, followed a few seconds later by a resounding 'BOOM!'

'No. No one would notice that,' he thought as he watched dozens of weary obliviators race out of the building, flashing their wands at everyone in sight.

* * *

Harry's and Tonks's arrival was uneventful. Tonks pulled her S.U.B. into a parking slot marked "13" that didn't exist between parking slots "12H" and "14A" and she and Harry levitated his gear inside to the service elevator.

The door closed and she pressed both the 12 and 14 buttons. The door immediately opened and the two began to get out, only to run headlong into Mundungus Fletcher, knocking him into the wall. Suddenly, about ten pounds of silverware cascaded out from under his robe.

Tonks looked at him sternly and sadly shook her head. "Dung, Dung, Dung. What have you done this time?"

"Shit, Shit, Shit. What are you going to do to me this time?" Fletcher replied in a resigned voice.

Tonks waved her wand and the forks suddenly rose into the air and poised themselves around Mundungus. Then, they swooped down at him, knocking him backwards so that he was pinned to the wall, the forks impaling his robes to form an outline around his body.

"Not very original," Mundungus muttered.

Harry looked down the long corridor and suddenly found himself in agreement. There were gouges and small holes in the walls in the form of an outline of Fletcher's body in about a dozen places down the corridor.

"Would you rather this, or would you rather share a room with Arabella," Tonks said casually to the hopelessly pinned wizard.

"Oh, please," he gasped. "Anything but that. That woman is insatiable, not to mention her constantly coughing up hairballs."

Somehow, Harry wished Dung hadn't mentioned it.

Tonks nodded and led Harry to the far end of the hallway and opened the door to a large suite. As Harry walked in the door, he gasped at the sight that he beheld.

* * *

"Oooooo, a cliffie! What did he see? What horrors lie within? Oh, my goodness, I can't stand the suspense."

A/N: Oh, for goodness sake! Just go down to the bottom of the page and click on the "Next Chapter" button already.