Uh Oh, You're Me

Ron was in shock. Hermione loves him. She loves him! She is in love with...with him! It was a good thing he was sitting down because if he wasn't he would've dropped like a rock. He fell back on Ginny's bed and opened his mouth several times to speak, but failing every time.

"Ginny? Please...is it really that bad a thing to love him?" Hermione asked timidly. "I mean...I know it's silly sense I have no chance with him, but-"

Ron suddenly found his voice again and sat up straight. "What on earth are you talking about?" he said in a voice much higher then Ginny's natural one.

"You don't have to protect me from the truth," Hermione said lowly. "I see the way he ogles Lavender."

"Ogles...Lavender?" Ron couldn't believe his ears. "Lavender?"

"Yeah, I see it all the time. It's really obvious how he feels about her."

"Please! Lavender hasn't got anything on you!"

Hermione looked up and gave him a very weird look. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," Ron said quickly. "How could you ever doubt that Ron...that Ron..."

"That Ron what?" Hermione said, suddenly quite interested.

"How could you think Ron likes Lavender?" Ginny said, ignoring the question.

"Well, it's really very obvious," Hermione replied, suddenly sounding bitter. "She's always hanging on to him, it makes me sick. She's like a groupie. She's so obsessed with him. She has a stuffed rabbit named Ron, a goldfish named Ron, her left slipper's named Ron, and she carved Ron & Lavender 4ever on her bedpost every night for two months!"

Ron let this soak in a bit before continuing. "I'm sorry, did you say a left slipper?"

"Yes!" Hermione said. "Isn't it ridiculous? At least the things I've named Ron are normal!"

Ron perked up. "What exactly have you named Ron?"

"They're all in my Ron Shrine," Hermione said.

Ron squealed like Ginny would've. "Show me, show me, and show me! SHOW ME!"

Hermione giggled and blushed. "Oh you're not interested in that, are you?"

"Giggling and blushing, very un-Hermione-ish." Ron said teasingly.

"Wanting to see a shrine to her brother, very un-Ginny-ish," Hermione said right back. "Come on, wouldn't it be weird for you?"

"No...um...it would be...educational?" Ron said, hoping that would work.

"Yeah, real educational," Hermione said sarcastically. "But I'll show you anyway." She pulled out an old shoebox and opened it. On the inside was a very organized shrine. In the center there was a picture of Ron. On either side were little candleholders that were covered in melted wax. On the floor below there were some of the smaller gifts he had given her for her birthday and Christmas; everything from the bracelet from Christmas of their first year, to the card and flowers he had given her for her birthday this year. She had dried and pressed them, but they were the same flowers. In the corner was a collection of tiny woodcarvings of him doing all sorts of things. There was one of him playing quidditch, one of him playing chess, one of him drinking, eating, sleeping, sitting, and many more.

"I carved those myself," Hermione said when she saw what he was looking at. She took out the figures and spread them on the floor. "I used a large piece of wood to carve with, then when it was finished I used a Shrinking Charm so I could fit them in here. Engorgio!"

They grew larger and Ron could see them more clearly. He was amazed. They were truly fantastic.

"H-Hermione!" he spluttered. "These are amazing!" He picked up a figure and studied it closely. It was of him hugging her. They were both grinning widely, happy just to be together. Ron smiled too. He wanted to be back in his body so badly that it hurt. He wanted to be able to do that, to be with her. He wanted to make her happy. He sighed aloud and looked up. Hermione was looking down modestly.

"I do more then just study, you know," she said.

"I know," Ron resisted the urge to stoke her cheek. "I never knew you were talented!"

Hermione looked up, flustered. "What do you mean by that? Are you saying you thought I was completely talentless?"

"W-what?" Ron said, clueless. "That's not what I said! What makes you think that's what I meant?"

"Never mind," Hermione said. "It's just that it bothers me that it never crosses anyone's mind that I might be more then just a bookworm." She drew her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on them.

Ron had no idea she felt that way. He was a little unsure what to say, so he said the first thing that came to mind. "You're so weird!"

She looked up with a skeptical look on her face. "Pardon me?"

"You're weird! That's ridiculous! I mean, come on, we all know you're great!"

"This is a strange thing to say when you're trying to cheer me up," Hermione said in response. "But it's kind of cool." She smiled. "Being weird is always cool."

"Damn straight!" Ron said defiantly.

"Ginny!" Hermione said, amused. "Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?"

"What's so bad about saying 'damn'?" Ron asked. "And no, I don't kiss my mother, she kisses me. The only person I'd want to kiss anyway is-" He stopped short. He almost said he wanted to kiss her, but that would've been bad. Very, very bad.

"I know who you want to kiss, Ginny," Hermione said, rolling her eyes. "You only talk about him a thousand times a night. You've been unusually quiet tonight, though. You're too fascinated by the fact that I like...scratch that...LOVE your brother."

Ron had to try extremely hard to conceal his happiness, as well as not to laugh. If Hermione only knew that she was saying all of this to him...

"Yes, let's talk some more about you and my brother," Ron said. He was desperate to hear every detail about what she thought of him. He decided to start asking questions. "When did you first decide you liked him? Or, as you put it, LOVE him."

"It was in third year, when he and I were having that big fight over Scabbers and Crookshanks," she began. "I realized that I hated being without him, which lead to me realizing I needed him, which made me realize I liked him. I didn't think it was love until later that year when I had slapped Malfoy and I was about to do it again and he grabbed my hand to restrain me. I felt this electric charge and I didn't wash that hand for three weeks."

Ron smiled widely. He was glad he had the same effect on her that she had on him. He decided not to bug her anymore tonight. He was exhausted, and he needed to ask questions tomorrow when he felt a bit more in control of his emotions.

"Well, I think it's time for bed," Ron said, looking at the clock. It was 11:55.

"I agree," Hermione said, looking at the clock as well. "I'm really tired. I'll see you in the morning." She began taking out her hair, but the scrunchie got tangled. "Dratted jungle!" she burst out angrily.

"Here," Ron offered. "Let me help with that." He had discovered that he quite enjoyed touching her hair. It was soft and light, and it smelled like shampoo. He tried to think of what it smelled like specifically, but he couldn't think of it. So, it officially had the smell of someone who uses shampoo. Whoopee. How romantic. Well, he tried.

"Okay," Hermione said gratefully. He walked over and found the knot. He pulled the silky locks apart carefully and slid the scrunchie off the rest of the way, savoring the feeling of the hair the entire time. "Thanks," she said once he had finished.

"My pleasure," he replied, completely truthful. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

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The next morning Ron got up and chose an all blue outfit. He figured if it was all one color it would automatically match. He actually brushed his hair himself and had Hermione put his hair in a pollyanna style. He looked in the mirror and he thought he didn't look too bad. He went downstairs and met Ginny waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs.

When he got there she looked him over. "Not bad, Weasley," she said, indicating that he should turn around. "Not bad at all. Except..."

"Except what?" Ron asked. What could possibly be wrong this time?

"You...you don't seem to be..." Ginny spluttered.

"I'm not what?" Ron said, starting to get annoyed.

"Well...you're...are you...because it doesn't look like you are..."

"Just say it!"

"You're not wearing a bra!" Ginny half yelled. Ron looked around the common room. Thankfully it was empty.

"Well...I tried...but there are so many little hooks and it's all twisty and it's so frustrating!" he said. "Plus the one you helped me with yesterday was all itchy and everything. How do you deal with this every day?"

"You grit your teeth and bear with it because if you don't wear one it gets painful and you look like bloody Britney Spears!" Ginny said, steering him towards the girl's dormitory. "Is Hermione still up there?"

"No, she went to the library with Harry," Ron replied. "And who the hell is Britney Spears?"

"She's a slutty muggle pop singer," Ginny replied. She opened her wardrobe and fished out a white bra. "Here," she said, tossing it to him. "It hooks in the front. See?"

"Okay," he said, gulping. "At least I don't have to figure out how to hook things up in places I can't see."

"That's right," Ginny said. "That's my only one like that, so you're going to have to wear it every day. I know it's gross, but it's your only option."

"Thanks," Ron replied. She nodded and turned to walk away. "Oh, and Ginny?"

She spun back around. "Yes?"

"When we're back to normal, I want you to block this out of my memory." He said.

She winked at him. "Will do."