What a Curious Meeting

The soft chiming of the front door wards was Harry's first indication that he had another caller. Luckily he could actually hear the warning this time, as Sirius and James had finally silenced themselves conveniently before his caller arrived. Threats of babysitting blast-ended skrewts had a tendency to quiet even the loudest of mouths. He turned away from the two boys, the broken sofa and the now gurgling lamp and went to the door.

He opened it gingerly, wary of any other surprises. Yet he was disappointed again as he found himself face to face with thin air. He stepped over the doorway and out to the yard, turning around and surveying the house. Quickly, though not quickly enough for his full comfort, he found a light blonde head standing behind the door, scratching at his open shutters.

"Luna?" he asked lightly, walking back towards the house and the open door. He put his arm around her waist and pulled her inside the house and quickly shutting the door. "Sorry, now might not be the best time."

"Are you stressed?" she said with concern. Her wide eyes quickly scanned him up and down, never blinking. Her light hair was still a bit tangled around the shoulders, but she was wearing a blue robe with dancing stars on it that Harry couldn't help but notice made her look quite pretty in the evening light. "I told you to charm those shutters; you've probably got a gorlack infestation around them, and gorlacks have a tendency to really make people a bit high-strung." Luna had a strange quality of talking that was singing more than anything else he could describe, and because of that, people never really listened to her. It was a shame, Harry thought to himself, because she had a tendency to say things that no one else would.

"A bit stressed, but really, I'm fine." He looked up and down her once again, and then checked the clock. "Sorry, did I forget something?"

"Oh no," she said in her airy voice again, "I need you to do something for me."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "I've got guests at the moment, though if you'd take a rain check, I'm sure we can find some more mutually agreeable time for me to do something for you. Or more to the point, to you." He grinned lightly, and Luna responded with a sweet sort of half-grin.

"Oh no, nothing like that. This is business. You're tomorrow's front page headline, Harry, and I was wondering if I could get an interview."

On one of the rare occasions that a reporter was granted an interview with the notoriously private Deputy Head of the Department of Mysteries, the reporter in question found herself in somewhat of a bind.

Just because Hermione Granger had agreed to be interviewed, didn't mean that she'd actually say anything.

She was twenty minutes into her interview and the best that she had gotten out of the woman was that the offices of the Department of Mysteries had recently had new carpets put in a rather nice shade of deep maroon. "So, Ms. Granger, back when you and several of your classmates, including Harry Potter, first invaded the Department of Mysteries, it was reported that your husband was attacked by what could only be described by witnesses as 'something angry with tentacles.' Since your appointment in the Department of Mysteries, have you done anything with these alleged beasts?"

"No comment."

"During that event, it was also recorded that one Sirius Black died when he 'fell through an ancient gate.' What exactly did he die from?"

"Unfortunately, I really can't say."

The situation was getting serious, and the reporter could see her article falling farther and farther back into the recesses of the paper. "Ms. Granger, as a friend of Harry Potter, how do you explain his history of dysfunctional relationships?"

"Well, he really can't help it, now can he?"

This had some potential. "How so?"

"Well, while everyone else was busy snogging and such as teenagers, he was busy fighting for his life. So it really doesn't come as a surprise to me that all Harry can think of when he gets a female caller is a conjugal visit."

It was the stuff of legends. No one knew what prompted her to say it, and Ms. Granger seemed to have said it in the clearest of minds. Not a moment afterwards, she smiled courteously and excused herself from the interview.

The reporter was given not only the front page article, but her own column to celebrate her coup de gras. It was quickly agreed upon that Ms. Granger would most likely never say anything as interesting again, and reporters simply stopped asking for interviews. Which, privately, suited Ms. Granger just fine. All that publicity nonsense really didn't help achieve the Department of Mystery's ultimate goal of world domination anyway.

"Front page?" Harry echoed hollowly. "Why? I haven't done anything particularly offensive lately...." He swept his hand to the left and directed Luna into the sitting room where he had left Sirius and James. He pointed towards the broken sofa, which he quickly fixed and sat down upon. James and Sirius were silent, though they seemed to be communicating through a secret system of timed blinks. Sirius batted his eyes several times and James gave a quick glance towards Luna before falling backwards into silent hysterics.

"Nothing offensive, Harry. The Quibber doesn't report scandals, only facts. It's going to be titled: 'Reclusive Millionaire', that would be you, Harry, 'Collecting Young Wards', that would be those two, I suppose," she said, as she indicated to James and Sirius, "'to help rid the Wizarding World of Evil.' Though it does sound fairly familiar..."

"Us? 'Young Wards'?" James inquired angrily.

"We're nobody's wards!" Sirius shot in quickly. "Well, except for our parents', of course."

"You've got it all wrong," Harry said crossly. Turning towards the boys, he whispered hoarsely, "You two be quiet or you'll be babysitting blast-ended skrewts for a month!"

"Sheesh," James said to Sirius loudly enough for both Harry and Luna to hear, "remind me to drop him on his head at an early age."

Sirius laughed and blinked five times, pausing for two seconds each time. James nodded.

"They're not my wards; they're just visiting for a while. Anyway, how'd you know they were here in the first place?"

"I've been watching your house." Harry raised an eyebrow. "You might have a gorlack infestation, you know."

Harry sighed. "Though your concern is heartwarming, could you do me a favor and maybe stop watching my home?"

"I suppose so, but when the gorlacks do burrow, I want to be here to see it."

"I'll owl you right away, of course." He got up and gently led Luna towards the door. He stopped at the front door. "Look, sorry about the article."

"It's all right, we'll just publish the other featured article, about the Department of Mystery's plans to take over the Muggle government with ill-designed voting ballots."

"Sounds interesting."

"Mmm, it should be. And Harry, do owl me whenever you'd like. Even if the gorlacks haven't hatched yet."