With a Little Help from My Friends

Hermione's Out-Going Owls:

Dear Ron,

The first time I hear from you in weeks, and naturally, it would be asking for help with your 'homework', so to speak. Really, you could have asked me yourself; am I all that frightening? Never mind, don't even answer that. However, since you are clearly at a loss, I am willing to help you. How you intend to plan your lessons depends entirely on the tact that you chose to take. Do you want to cover the same material, but grow in detail as the years progress? Do you want to focus on certain branches each year, the way Professor Lupin did? Since I'm assuming that you won't follow in your long line of predecessors who only managed one year, you need to keep in mind that you can't simply teach the same thing to everyone. Speak to Professor Dumbledore and find out what exactly was covered for each level in previous years. What textbooks did you choose for each year? I'll need to take a look at them. Bring any information you can find about past curriculum along with all the textbooks and homework you assigned over the summer on Friday, and we can sit down and have a proper discussion.

I suppose I don't really need to mention that I think it's appalling that you left all this with so little time to spare. If it weren't for the fact that it is entirely unfair on the students if they are greeted by an incompetent teacher, I would leave you to sort out your own mess. I want you to know that beyond the initial planning, you are completely on your own. Have you even begun to work?

That aside, I have to ask; is Malfoy actually teaching Potions? If so, the inclination towards another violent outburst like in our third and sixth years is remarkable. I'm sure Professor Dumbledore is aware of what he's doing, but really, Malfoy will be blatantly biased towards Slytherin, and I still don't trust him. Still, no doubt Professor Dumbledore knows best. Even so, I'll admit I'm a bit worried. Look, whatever you do, don't let him get to you! You know he'll try to provoke you, and he's not worth losing your position over.

Stay calm and stay organized.

LoveSincerelyYours From,

Hermione

P.S. Ron, you absolutely must give Mrs. Appleby the rent you owe her, with interest. She deserves it; it's illegal for you not to pay. She has every right to hold your furniture.

Dear Harry,

I wrote to Ron. I'll help him, but he really ought to be doing it himself. Tell me, what sort of blackmail did he have to use against you in order to force you to appeal on his behalf?

As far as I know, I have no new boyfriend. If you hear from him, would you mind asking him to let me know who he is, how long we've been involved, and how serious our relationship is? Honestly, Ginny must have been exaggerating again. I really think she needs to stop meddling in other people's love lives. She's been better since she got one of her own as a distraction, but even so, it can be rather trying.

How are things going with the Manner case? Word gets around between departments. It's incredible that anyone could be so unshakably evil by the age of eighteen. I'm sure Tom Riddle managed it with style, but really, it still shocks me. I'm so sorry that you always get that sort of case. I'm managing quite well at the moment, so if you need any help with research or other minor cases, I'm happy to help out. You have plenty on your plate right now without having to do the petty searching for past similar cases for reports and such.

Love,

Hermione

Dear Ginny,

I'm sorry, I clearly must have made some sort of terrible mistake, and accidentally told you that Justin was my potential life-partner rather than my boss. My apologies, I'll try to be clearer next time.

Really Ginny, I know you have my best interests at heart, but there is nothing going on between me and Justin. Even if there was, I wouldn't plunge in without thinking.

Is it just me, or does Allen Rawson live in the same sort of mind-set as the late Alastor Moody?

Work is turning out better than I possibly could have imagined. Studying was all well and good, but now I feel like I'm out of my shell and actually doing something to help the outside world. It's really quite invigorating. I've sorted out countless cases at this point, and my judgment is coming to be well-respected throughout the department. It's a huge honor.

I have to go for now or else I'll be late. Good luck braving the elements.

Love,

Hermione

Justin,

As sweet as it was for you to offer dinner after the hearing, I'm afraid I can't make it. I've got plans to meet up with some old friends from school. I'd love to do something another time though. By the way, I left files A-H on your desk in the large blue folder, and I'll have H-P to you by the end of the week. When would you like the Welsh Green report?

-Hermione

A Refrigerator Notice:

Hermione, darling! I see you didn't eat all of the lasagna. Keep working on it, I'm very proud! Now, I've decided that since we keep on missing each other because you've become so involved in work, we need to do something to bond, and I came up with the perfect idea! Look in the living room. You see the hutch sitting in the corner of the sitting room? The green one? Well, look inside! Isn't he just ADORABLE? And with the three of us, we'll be like one big family! I was thinking about naming him Sean or Thomas. Which do you prefer? I didn't get a white one because I find the red eyes absolutely terrifying, but I think the brown ones are just as cute. Wait 'til you get eyeful of those ears! Isn't he just the be all and end all? Anyway, that's all that comes to mind for the moment. I'm making cabbage soup tonight, so if you're not home by seven, it'll be in the fridge. Give some to our new furry friend in the shamrock dish in the cabinet!

~*~Bailey~*~

Ginny's Out-Going Owls:

Dear Harry,

Don't be ridiculous, of course Hermione's love life is my business! She's my best friend, and so I have every right to pry as much as I feel necessary. Besides, do you want her and Ron to stop biting each others' heads off, or not? Just leave everything to me. With any luck at all, they'll go together to Fred and George's party. Never underestimate a Weasley playing matchmaker. After all, I got you, didn't I?

By the way, can you pick me up a half hour later than planned? Rawson's gone ballistic and is dolling out overtime. Try not to get yourself too stressed with work.

Your Ingenious Girlfriend,

Ginny

Dear Hermione,

All right, all right, I get the message; you needn't turn the Granger sarcasm upon your unsuspecting best friend. Don't make me sic Harry on you. I live in hope that I'll eventually get to see him start a fight over me.

If it weren't for the narrow age-gap, I'd swear that Rawson was Mad-Eye incarnate. Still, age gap or not, if he says, "Constant vigilance!" even once, I'm out of here.

I'm glad to hear you're enjoying work. Just promise me you won't turn into Percy, okay? Please do keep in mind that there is a world outside of the ministry, and an interesting one at that.

Thanks for the luck, I'll need it; I'm coming home exhausted every night.

Love,

Ginny

Cat,

Thanks for the tip about tomorrow being wilderness survival day. Who was your source, and how the hell did they manage to read Rawson's mind? I seriously hope they're not just going to provoke him into taking immediate action like the last time. Even so, whoever it is, I owe them either eternal gratitude or a big kiss, depending on gender. I say we stick together; it takes at least the two of us to set up a tent.

-Ginny

Poster Outside Rawson's Office:

ATTENTION ALL AUROR TRAINEES:

Your current trainer, Allen Rawson, is not who you believe him to be.

That's right; he is in fact an AZKABAN ESCAPEE!

We would appreciate your assistance in capturing and subduing this highly dangerous individual, guilty of the following crimes:

-Torture and murdering several former students

-Acting so paranoid it drove several former students into St. Mungo's mental ward

-Looking like a troll's rear end

Please consider this man to be armed with lethal weaponry; simply the stench he produces could stop a charging hippogriff. This has been a public service announcement courtesy of some bored and vindictive pupils.

Harry's Out-Going Owls:

Dear Ginny,

You know, sometimes you scare me. It's lucky you're so cute.

Seriously though, you think you can have them together by Halloween? I'm sorry, but not even you have that kind of power. If you weren't my gorgeous girlfriend, I'd suggest a little wager in the department.

Are you quite sure you didn't mean infamous rather than ingenious?

See you tonight,

-Harry

Ron,

I hope you realize that in quitting the force, you condemned "The Boy Who Lived" to go down in history as "The Boy Who Lived, But It Didn't Make Much of A Difference Because He Later Had A Nervous Break-Down Because His No-Good Partner Abandoned Him To Go Play With Small Children." You just had to pick now, of all times, to quit. And so naturally, I'm stuck with one of the worst cases since the former Death Eaters actually organized themselves enough to scare the shit out of half of Britain. This whole situation is a total nightmare. He hasn't killed yet, just gathered a few followers, tortured people, sent some threatening letters, and raised the mark. Even so, if it's only a matter of time before the Prophet finds out, and then we're in real trouble. We're working on tracking down Manner as I write this, but God, he's not an easy boy to find. The whole situation is just completely bizarre. We've pulled just about every man off his regular. Vampire attacks have been increasing, too; we're really starting to worry there could be a connection. If this all gets out, there'll be total panic and anarchy.

So, I've heard that the big tough guy finally managed to hear from Hermione! Are you swelling with pride since you actually managed to communicate with her, albeit not directly? Seriously, Weasley, you're disgusting. By the way, are you going to the twins' Halloween party? Just out of curiosity, mind.

Good luck dealing with the Ickle students. I have a real job, unfortunately, so I have to go get back to work before I get my head bitten off. After all, I must maintain constant vigilance!

-Harry

Dear 'Mione,

If you recognized that that required blackmail, you know us too well. He just helped me out of an awkward situation; it wasn't a big deal.

Just for the sake of verification, could you please either confirm or deny the following?

1. Your boss is in fact Justin Talmere, brother of Robert Talmere, newly appointed Chaser for the Chudley Cannons, worst team in the history of Quidditch.

2. Justin Talmere (See boss mentioned above) is passionately in love with you.

3. You didn't know who Patrick Moran was without an explanation with Ginny.

The first two points are relatively unimportant; I just thought I'd seek a solution to the rumors directly from those involved. However, if the third statement is in fact true (God forbid), we need to have a very long talk. I recognize you now have a job to attend, but really, this is serious stuff.

Wait a minute, how did you find out about the Manner case? That's supposed to be classified! Not that I don't trust you to keep your mouth shut, but it's really important that the public doesn't realize what's going on before we have the whole situation wrapped up and shipped firmly off to Azkaban. Besides, if you know, other people must as well. The whole thing could escalate to a crisis situation and blow up in our faces at any moment, so we're treating the situation as though it's made of glass. I agree, though, there's something really blood-curdling about someone so young being so sadistic. There's nothing I can do at the moment, but believe me, if I think of something I'll let you know.

-Harry

Ron's Out-Going Owls:

Hermione,

Yes Mum, and I'll be sure to bring clean socks and de-gnome the garden as soon as I finish my homework. I don't know what the old bat's talking about; I don't owe any rent, and I want my stuff! Please tell me you didn't actually just write out, "Stay calm and stay organized." I think I'm going to scream. Sometimes I wonder about you, 'Mione. Were you this bad at school, or has the ministry brainwashed you into becoming a creepy combination of McGonagall and Percy?

All right, I'm sorry. I didn't mean any of that, I'm just venting my terror at the approaching school year by firing rude remarks at you. Yes, I'm a stupid prat who should have done my work ages ago, and deserved everything I said. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Will you still help me? This whole place looks like Harry's Nimbus after it hit the Whomping Willow in third year.

Obviously I didn't give them homework over the holidays; that would be cruel and unusual. I've put the textbook list in the envelope with this letter, though. You're an absolutely brilliant, Hermione; I owe you one. I reckon I'll probably just pick a different topic for each of the years. I'll talk to Dumbledore at dinner tonight.

And yes, Malfoy, the bloody King of Gits himself is going to be teaching Potions. There's only one possible explanation I can come up with as to why Dumbledore hired him; he's barmy. Dumbledore, I mean. Don't get me wrong, he's an incredible wizard and all, and the best headmaster Hogwarts ever had, but he's completely off his rocker. Malfoy won't just be biased; he'll probably actively persecute Gryffindors! No one will be safe! It'll be a thousand times worse that Severus Snape's reign of terror! I'm not going to let him get to me, though. He'd just better not even consider making any cracks about my family, or anything.

Thanks again for your help, and I'll see you on Friday.

-Ron

Harry,

Look, mate, I'm sorry. Dumbledore offered me the job, and I took it, for obvious reasons. If you'd like, I'll kill off Malfoy or Flitwick or someone so there'll be an opening and you can join me. If you need any help with raids that aren't on a school night, you can count me in. But right now, there's nothing I can do, and we both know it. Don't worry, the ministry will handle the Prophet; you know they've got infiltration throughout the media industry. They'll keep it quiet for as long as you need to do a quick sweep. Within a month, the papers will be reporting yet another triumphant victory for the famous Harry Potter. Get some sleep, and then get to work. You'll manage. As for the vampires, with any luck it's just breeding season. You can get rid of the prodigy kid, then stake the blood-suckers.

I'm going to completely ignore the jibe about Hermione. You owed me, so you can't whine.

As for Hogwarts, how is it that Malfoy seems to pop out of nowhere whenever he's not wanted? Maybe it makes it a little easier that he's never wanted, but even so, it's creepy.

He swept in to my office today. Seriously, he just waltzed right in like he owned it as well as the rest of the school. He took one glance around it (and I'll admit it's not exactly tidy), and said in that obnoxious drawl that still makes me want to punch his face in, "Wow Weasley, among all this filth, I bet you feel right at home."

Of course, the only thing I could do, as I sat there clenching my desk so hard that my knuckles were white, was to reply, "Look, Malfoy, if you don't like it, why are you even here?" He just raised an eyebrow and widened that damned cocky grin, then sort of oozed out. It was all I could do not to curse him into oblivion. I swear, if my job wasn't on the line, I'd practically have killed him by now. Just seeing him with that smirk tells me what he's thinking, and I don't know how much more I can take.

Anyway, it's time for another dinner in which I deliberately sit as far from Malfoy as possible. Maybe I'll get to find out about Hagrid's new pet. I suppose we have to be more careful, now that Hermione has to look for unregistered beasts. Joy.

-Ron