A Change'll Do You Good

Yes, I finally updated. It's been a real struggle to get this far; I had a chapter that I really wanted to write but it takes place later in the story so I have to work my way toward it. Please, please, please don't leave reviews that just say "update soon" or "make longer chapters." I'm really doing the best I can.

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Part 9:
A Room with a View

Draco frowned as he looked at the sea of scarlet-and-gold that surrounded him, Potter and Weasel on either side of him and, across the way, sat the Weaselette and Largebottom. He was completed by the people he hated most. How cruel and fickle a maiden was fate...bloody Gryffindors, he thought with annoyance. Well, at least as Head Boy -- er Head Girl -- he'd have a room of his own, far, far, far away from the Gryffindors...well, most of the Gryffindors. He looked across the room to his body which was currently being checked by Pansy and Blaise (and every other female between the age of eleven and eighty and quite a few males as well).

Hermione, who currently occupied said tall, blonde, and gorgeous body (if Draco did say so himself), looked like she was trying to hide. It would have been amusing if that terrified look been on Hermione's own brown-haired, brown-eyed, freckled visage and not on his handsome, blonde, pale, silver-eyed one...

He ate his food in silence, glaring at Potter, Weaselette, Largebottom, and Weasel who kept trying to draw him into conversation. Finally, the four gave up and talked amongst themselves. When he was full, his plate cleared and he looked around him. Too many Gryffindors, so few hexes. Eventually the sounds of eating were replaced with groans of the full and Professor Dumbledore rose to talk. Blah-blah -- world in danger -- blah-blah -- Voldemort is back. Draco tuned out the bespectacled elderly man and, instead, thought of interesting ways to torture, dismember, and kill whoever put him in Hermione's body.

Then there was a hand on his -- Hermione's thigh -- his eyes widened and he looked at the hand's owner. Weasel had slid his hand to Draco's -- Hermione's -- thigh. Brown eyes narrowed with anger. "You will remove your hand or I will remove your fingers," he growled with Hermione's voice. The freckled hand was soon removed and Draco scooted closer to Potter and hoped for the end of the Feast.

---

Hermione wasn't being molested by a long-nosed, freckled redhead but it wasn't as if she was in any better company. Thankfully, Blaise was being quite nice even if she felt a bit uncomfortable from the way he kept looking at her. She was at a standstill at what to say although the manners that had been forced into her by her parents (and once upon a time by Great-Grandmother Granger until the elderly woman had found out her great-granddaughter was a witch and the octogenarian had screamed that Hermione should be burned at the stake) dictated that she should at least make an attempt to converse.

"So, er...how about those Cannons?" she asked.

Blaise looked at her as if she had lost her mind. "You're kidding, right? They make Pansy look good at Quidditch," the black-haired youth said.

"Oh...right," Hermione said, trying to think of things that she could say.

"But even I have to admit that their newest Chaser is quite delectable," he stated.

Hermione frowned, nodded, and wondered if the Chaser was a girl or a boy. If it was a girl, then Parvati owed Lavender seven Sickles, if not then Lavender owed Parvati twelve Sickles (five for Draco's silk boxers and seven for Blaise's sexual orientation). She looked across the Great Hall where her body sat between Harry and Ron and then her gaze darted to where Lavender and Parvati were whispering and turning their gazes toward Hermione-in-Draco's-body with the lovesick look of lust that most females and a few males were giving her.

What do they see in Draco!? Hermione wondered, utterly confused. He's a complete and utter prat, a despicable bastard and...no man should ever look that good in silk boxers. Hermione's eyes widened as Draco's gaze met hers, brown eyes shining with amusement and a hint of a smirk on the lips. Oh, God, I did not just think that!

I knew you had to be checking out my body, Granger, you naughty, naughty girl, he purred in response.

I vehemently despise you, she replied.

I feel the same, Mudblood, he stated.

Well, Draco, you're in MY body...which means you have my blood. You're the Mudblood now, she said.

Across the room at the Gryffindor table, Hermione Granger's eyes opened in abject horror and, at the Slytherin table, a smile slid across Draco Malfoy's lips.

---

After the Feast, Draco and Hermione waited for Professor Dumbledore to take them to the Head Chambers while glaring at each other with open hostility. After twenty minutes of waiting for Professor Dumbledore to stop talking to Professor McGonagall, the Headmaster finally made his way to the Head Girl and Boy. "Very well, I'll take you to your Chambers," he said.

The glaring continued as the Professor led them to a tower which was guarded by a painting of Hogwarts with four figures in front of it: one was a tall, pale wizard with lank, greasy black hair, black eyes, and a monkey-like face with a silver scepter and wearing robes of silver-and-green with a large snake draped on his shoulders; beside the cold man stood a kindly-looking brown-haired, round-faced, motherly woman with twinkling yellow eyes dressed in robes of black-and-yellow, a trowel in her hand and a badger at her feet; on the woman's other side stood a tall, thin, aristocratic-looking woman with bronze-red hair, high cheekbones, and heavy-lidded blue eyes wearing robes of blue-and-bronze, holding a bronze telescope with an eagle perched on her shoulder; on the opposite side of the canvas stood a tall, muscular man with a lion's mane of blond hair, golden eyes, golden skin, clad in robes of scarlet-and-gold, holding a sword with a lion at his feet. "Ah, yes, Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, I'd like for you to meet Godric Gryffindor--" Dumbledore started.

"How delightful! Another Gryffindor! I am most pleased to make your acquaintance, Miss Granger!" the man in scarlet-and-gold proclaimed, the lion roaring in agreement.

"Rowena Ravenclaw." Dumbledore nodded toward the tall woman who gave a disappointed smile.

"What, Albus, have no Ravenclaws earned grades good enough to be Head Boy or Girl?" she questioned.

"Well, the Sorting Hat thought about putting me in Ravenclaw," Hermione said.

"Really, Mr. Malfoy?" Dumbledore asked. "I was under the impression that the Sorting Hat had barely touched your head when it put you in Slytherin."

"Er...yeah," Hermione stammered. "You know how fast that old hat thinks..."

"Of course I do!" Godric proclaimed.

"A Slytherin!" the greasy man on the far side of the canvas purred, stroking the snake that slithered over his shoulders. "It's about time, Albus!" He glared at Draco with distaste. "Unfortunately, yet another Mudblood..."

Draco glared at the man. "Excuse me! I'll have you know that..." he trailed off as Hermione gave him a look "...that I am the best student in Hogwarts."

The round-faced woman at his side glared at the dark-haired man. "You will not use that word around decent people, Salazar!" she growled, brandishing her trowel at him. When the man moved to speak again, Rowena silenced him with Silencio and he gave her a glare of great loathing. "I'm sorry about Salazar, children, he's extremely rude."

"And, of course," Professor Dumbledore said, "Salazar Slytherin" -- he nodded toward the dark-haired man who gave a very rude gesture -- "And Helga Hufflepuff." Helga gave a small curtsy and a sweet smile that showed dimples.

"It's an honor to make your acquaintance, young Mr. Malfoy and Miss Granger. I'll have you know that the senior Malfoy was quite the troublemaker," Helga said, accenting her words with gestures of her trowel. "You are Head Boy and Girl; you are an example for all students."

"Er...yeah, I promise to behave, Professor Hufflepuff," Hermione said sheepishly.

"I will have none of that!" Helga stated, blushing prettily. "I must insist that you call me 'Helga.'"

Hermione smiled brightly at Helga who gave a girlish giggle. "And just as handsome as his father, don't think you can sway me, young Mr. Malfoy," she said, waggling her finger at him.

Rowena rolled her eyes heavenward. "Oh, really, Helga," she murmured. "Password?"

Dumbledore stroked his beard thoughtfully. "Friendship," the man stated.

"Very well then, Albus," Godric said and the portrait opened and Hermione, Draco, and Dumbledore made their way up a staircase and into a luxurious common room dominated by a roaring fire that had the Hogwarts Crest hanging above it. All around the tower were large windows that looked over the grounds of Hogwarts, the lake, and the Forbidden Forest.

"Nice view," Hermione murmured as she looked down at the darkened grounds, wondering how beautiful the grounds would look at sunset or sunrise. She, then, looked over the room which held all the House colors, dominated by Slytherin green and Gryffindor gold.

"Draco Dormiens Numquam Tittilandos," Draco said with a smirk as he read the Hogwarts Crest.

"To the right is Miss Granger's room and, to the left, is Mr. Malfoy's room," Dumbledore said. "I trust you will make yourselves cozy." He headed back the way he had come, whistling under his breath.

"Well, I'd like to say that I enjoy the pleasure of your company, but that would be a lie," Hermione said, heading toward the spiral stairs that led to the Head Girl's room.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you..." Draco drawled.

"Well, you aren't me so..." she trailed off at the absurdity of her rebuttal and managed to get halfway up the spiral staircase before it turned into a slide and she fell ass-over-teakettle down the slide.

Draco smirked down at her. "Told you so..." he stated. "Boys are less trustworthy than girls." Hermione blinked up at him, Draco frowned. "Er...right..."

"I don't really get the point here," Hermione said, picking herself up and dusting off her trousers. "I mean, there are other places to have sex here than in the bedrooms..."

Draco chuckled. "Well, the founders were probably old-fashioned and thought the only place to do so was in the bedrooms."

There was a long, awkward pause. "Are we talking about sex?" Hermione said and Draco nodded, looking thoroughly shell-shocked. "We're going to pretend this never happened."

"Definitely," he replied, swallowing hard and moving up the newly-reformed spiral staircase toward the Head Girl's room.