Harry Potter and the Dark Separation

publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books,
and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made (shame) and no copyright or trademark infringement
is intended.
Influences- The tone of the story is inspired mildly by the works of Cassandra Claire,
especially the awful pun on L'oreal (inspired by her Benson and Hexes gag in Draco Veritas).
'Thomas Archer' is one of my friends. Thanks to my family (especially my brother, who suggested
'Harry Potter and the Copyright Infringement' as a title) my friends, and everyone on Harry
Potter Cinescape.

       'Oh, to hell with this!'
       Ron cautiously emerged from behind an upturned table in the Gryffindor common room, where
the decor had been rather ruined by the remains of three cauldrons. One was fried to a crisp,
one had its bottom melted away, and one, in an interesting if slightly disturbing way, had
sprouted ears and winced slightly at Harry's annoyed exclamation.
       Harry was standing over a fourth cauldron, which was bubbling fiercely and releasing
luminous gases. He seemed to have thrown the ladle with which he was stirring the concoction
with some force at a portrait on the wall, which was looking reprovingly at the young wizard
as he kicked the cauldron.
       'Not working then?' Ron asked nervously, ready to dive at any moment.
       'Oh, it's working, if you're making a Bloody Useless Potion. As a Snakesbreath Antidote,
it's about as useful as half a bloody Flobberworm.' Harry sank, frustrated, into a comfortable
chair in the common room. Ron managed a few cautious steps across the room to another chair.
       'I don't suppose we can get an extension on our homework?'
       'Don't be such a bloody idiot, Ron. The day Snape gives us an extension is the day I
clog-dance naked in the Great Hall.'
       Ron groaned. Snape had, indeed, come back from his short trip away from Hogwarts in a
fouler temper than ever. He set homework with impossible deadlines, which the Slytherins always
seemed to meet (Ron had a sneaking suspicion that Snape was helping them in secret) and was
setting back the Gryffindors' grades no end. He had threatened to keep Ron and Harry back in
detention for a month, or worse, give them private tuition from Draco, which Harry knew Draco
would relish. Draco was extremely happy these days, which was never a good sign- 'it's usually
a dead giveaway that some poor sod is being screwed over' as Ron put it the first day of term,
when he seemed so radiant that Harry half-expected him to break into a musical number.
       'I honestly think that if I was bitten by a Runespoor, I'd be dead of poison before we
could brew one of these up. In fact, I think we'd die of a bite from a Puffskein before we
could brew it. Let's just go to sleep, and then we can at least be gloated at by Draco with
clear heads.'
       'I'm sure we can do this. We just need another cauldron and maybe a little less of the
Ledigo leaves.' As he spoke, the first cauldron crumbled to dust.
       'Who's got one we can borrow? We've already messed up mine, yours, Neville's- and, by
the way, how are we going to explain the ears to him?- and we've used Hermione's for this one.'
       'Do you think we should have told her first?'
       'Nah. And there's Seamus, who'd be fine except he blew his out of the top window of the
Astronomy Tower trying to do last week's homework, and the girls, who we can't get at. They're
all in their dorm, trying out that new nail polish that Fred gave them.'
       'Do you think we should have told them that it turns your fingers invisible?'
       Harry did a double take. 'You didn't tell me it turns your fingers invisible!'
       'And this matters because... hey, you're not wearing nail polish, are you?'
       'Nah, but I gave some of it to Hermione. She used her last a few days ago, and I told
       her that Fred had some.'
       Ron snickered. 'This should be funny. Completely taken my mind off the impending problem
of cauldrons. Hey, how about the Creeveys?'
       'I don't think so.'
       'Oh, come on, they'll lend you anything. Even if it is likely to end up be-eared. Harry
Potter, the legend- they worship you, Harry.'
       Harry fell silent.
       'Oh... I'm sorry...'
       'Never mind.'
       Harry hadn't talked about the events of the last term since they went back to Hogwarts
for their fifth year. He seemed to be trying to repress it, Ron thought, as he would have done
in the same situation. They'd never brought it up, and Harry just seemed to be trying to make
it through the term. He had to figure out how to deal with it himself, Dumbledore had told them
at the start of term. And he seemed to be dealing quite well, although Ron had noticed he was a
bit more withdrawn and spent less time with him and Hermione.
       'What the hell are you doing with my cauldron?'
       Ron and Harry turned, identical guilty expressions on their faces. Hermione stood in the
doorway to the common room, hand on hip, looking like she meant business.
       'Oh...this thing? This isn't your cauldron. This is... Neville's cauldron.'
       'The cauldron's got my name on it, Ron. Look, here, right on the side 'Hermione Granger,
Gryffindor''.
       Ron turned to Harry. 'Told you we should have removed that.'
       'It's un-erasable, Ron. That's Neville's cauldron, with the... ears. And that's yours,
and that's Harry's...' She stopped, equally bemused, amused and annoyed.
       'What in god's name are you doing? I mean, I know Potions was never your favourite
subject, but don't take it out on the cauldrons. Or is this some kind of anti-cauldron
terrorist movement?'
       'Ha ha. Look, we're trying to sort out our Potions homework, and it's not going
exceptionally well. Although we seem to have discovered a way to set metal on fire,
which could be useful. I don't suppose you could...'
       'Do it for you. Harry, if you don't do it, you'll never learn it, and if you don't
learn it, you'll flunk your OWLs, and then you'll end up working in Weasley's Wizard Wheezes
as a test subject.'
       'That could be an experience. Something to tell the grandchildren. Assuming I could
still have grandchildren. Can't you just give us some kind of pointer? A hint? A step-by-step
guide, with handy illustrations? If we fail this homework, look, Snape has plans to keep us
behind so Draco can tutor us in potions.'
       Hermione winced. 'Harsh.'
       'You see?'
       'Okay. But this is a one-time-only deal. Here's a clue- you're along the right lines,
but the Porogal root... not a good idea. And you'll need less of the Ledigo leaves.'
       'Told you so.'
       'Hang on. Is that ladle leaking on the carpet?'
       'Yeah' Ron replied. 'Harry had a temper tantrum. Is that a problem?'
       'Do you know what happens when powdered Porogal root comes into contact with cloth?'
       'No. Why don't you tell...'
       Ron had a sudden flash of insight and dived for the ladle, just as the carpet burst into
flame. With a groan of 'Boys' Hermione pulled her wand out and cried 'Extinguishus!'
       The carpet fire spluttered out. Ron stood up, clutching the ladle like his life depended
on it, while Harry got to work removing the rest of the potion from the floor.
       'See, that's why the Porogal root isn't a good idea.'
       'Well, now she tells us' Harry said, standing up. 'So how will we get the rest of it out
of the potion?'
       'Ah! I said I was only going to help you once. I did. You'll have to sort this one out
yourself.'
       'You're a real friend, Herm, you know that?'
       'You'll thank me in the long run, Harry. Knowing how to fix potions will be invaluable
in your OWLs.'
       Harry sighed. 'Great. She won't help us out.'
       'Well, at least she gave us a hint. So, what removes powdered Porogal and Ledigo leaves?'
       'Try the Filtratus Charm. Worth a try, I think.'
       Ron pulled out his wand, pointed it into the bubbling concoction and, ready to dive,
shouted 'Filtratus!'
       A white ray of light shot out of the end of his wand and expanded into a cone shape.
The solid ingredients levitated out of the cauldron, turned, and, with great ceremony,
dropped on Ron's head. Harry burst out laughing.
       'Oh, yes, very funny' said Ron, from somewhere under a pile of leaves.
       'Well, at least it's out. Now let's try and get the right amount in this time.'

       A few hours later, the cauldron was filled with a bubbling yellow substance that
smelled disconcertingly of cheese. Harry had filled a vial with the stuff, and was looking
at it curiously as Ron removed a stray leaf from his hair.
       'Do you think this is right?'
       'Well, there's only one way to find out. Go out, find a Runespoor, and get yourself bit.
Or, if you're not in the mood, just hand it into Snape tomorrow. If it's wrong, he'll tell you.'
       'Hmm... it looks like the textbook says it should. I'm not quite sure about the shade-
the one in the book was a lot darker.'
       'Oh, forget it. We'll never get this right. We're pushing eleven o'clock, anyway, and I
don't particularly fancy getting half the cauldron over my head again.'
       'Shame. It was funny.' As he spoke, the portrait at the end of the room swung open and
a few second-years climbed through. Harry recognised Dennis Creevey, and there was another he
knew slightly- Thomas Archer- but the rest he only saw in the Great Hall occasionally. They were
all talking very fast in very low voices.
       'Should have seen it...'
       'Way cool...'
       'Amazing...'
       They stopped short.
       'Well, what do we have here?' Ron asked, his face deadly serious. 'Four little
curfew-breakers, I'd guess. We should report them to McGonagall, don't you think, Harry?'
       'Oh, yes' Harry replied. 'It's our duty as responsible and mature fifth-years to report
any violations of the rules.'
       'Because' Ron continued 'when we were in second year, we never slipped out of the
common room in the middle of the night. No, sir.'
       Dennis ran forward. 'Please don't report us, please, Harry!'
       'It's okay, Dennis, we're just having a joke. So, what's 'way cool?''
       'We can't tell you.'
       'Why?'
       A girl at the back spoke up. 'We were told not to.'
       'By who?'
       'We can't tell you that, either.'
       'Well' Ron said, sinking down into an armchair 'this is certainly a productive
conversation. Go on, kiddies, run along to your dorms before McGonagall turns up.'
       They thanked Harry and Ron and ran off up the staircases. Harry turned to Ron.
'I think I'll follow their lead. I am completely knackered out.'
       'Me too. Let's just tidy up this mess.'
       A few minutes and handy charms later, the pair had restored the cauldrons to something
resembling intact, and went up the stairs to their dorms. Harry was asleep before his head hit
the pillow.

       Next morning, at breakfast, the Gryffindor table was attracting a lot of attention.
Half of the girls, who had tried Fred's nail varnish, were having extreme trouble eating and
casting looks of hatred in the Weasley twins' direction. When Harry and Ron got down in the
morning, Hermione was already at breakfast, trying to eat a slice of toast.
       'How's your hand?' Ron asked innocently.
       Hermione smiled sardonically. 'I would give you the finger, but I've got nothing to
work with. I'm telling you, Harry, from now on you don't give me anything, ever, that Fred and
George have ever been within ten metres of.'
       Ron turned to George, who was in tears with laughter at the table.
       'How's it going?'
       'Well' answered Fred, marginally in more control of himself than his brother 'half the
female population of the house now hates me with a fiery passion. But, on the plus side, I can
report that the N'otreal nail varnish works extremely well.'
       'Are you going to be pulling tricks like this all year? First it was the Ton-Tongue
Toffees, then the Canary Creams, and now this.' Hermione said, attempting to butter her toast.
       'Probably. I'm hoping to diversify. The next one will be on the Slytherins, so you
don't need to worry for about a month. We're working on...what was it?'
       'Expanding Lollipops' replied George, recovering slightly. 'As soon as you put them
in your mouth, they expand to triple size. Simple, really, just an Engorgement Charm with a
few tweaks. They'll be at the Hallow'een feast, so avoid them.'
       'Thanks for the tip' said a first-year sitting next to George.
       'That's okay. Tell all your friends, unless they're in Slytherin.' George replied.
He turned back to Ron. 'We've pretty much given up hope of passing our NEWTs, so we're spending
most of our time developing new tricks.'
       'Mum won't like that.'
       'What she don't know won't hurt her. Anyway, she's too busy worrying about Percy to
really care about what the rest of the family's doing.'
       Harry nodded. He'd heard from Ron that Percy had been promoted to head of the Department
of International Magical Co-operation- the youngest ever, according to Mr Weasley. In the
absence of anyone willing to run the Department, Percy had stepped up, but he seemed to have
bitten off more than he could chew. Even with the help of his parents, he was finding the
workload overwhelming, and, Harry suspected, having Mrs Weasley 'helping' him twenty-four
hours a day wasn't making the situation any better.
       'Well, we're off. We'd better not be late for Potions, or Snape will skin us alive.'
Fred and George negotiated their way through the crowd, avoiding murderous girls and people who
wanted to buy some of the nail varnish, and exit through the doors at the end of the hall.
       'Speaking of, we'd probably get going. It's double Care of Magical Creatures with
Grubbly-Plank next. She ain't a patch on Hagrid, is she?'
       Hagrid hadn't returned from the journey Dumbledore had sent him on. Although
Grubbly-Plank didn't work them too hard, she wasn't half as friendly as Hagrid, and seemed to
only know about one kind of magical creature. This was their fifth lesson on unicorns, and,
although the girls weren't complaining, most of the boys were getting bored with the endless
lectures on the nobility and grace of the unicorn.
       Harry, Ron and Hermione stood up, Hermione's fingers gradually becoming visible again.
As they left, Harry spotted someone they knew.
       'Hey, Neville!'
       Neville turned. 'Oh, hi, Harry. Do you know what we've got next?'
       'Care of Magical Creatures.'
       'Oh, no' Neville groaned. 'Not more unicorns.' Ron and Harry nodded their agreement.
       'Unicorns are fascinating creatures, and it's important we learn them for our OWLs,
people! Didn't anything Professor Grubbly-Plank said sink in?'
       'You know, Hermione, you talk about the OWLs like they're next week. We've got more
than three-quarters of a year before we have to take them.'
       'Yeah, but we've got to learn this stuff now. It's vital...'
       Ron and Harry started mouthing the words. '...that we learn it before our OWLs'.
Hermione hit them on the shoulder. 'That was not nice, boys.'
       'You know' said Harry, nursing his shoulder 'you've got a pretty hard punch for
someone with no fingers.'
       Hermione flexed her translucent fingers. 'Remind me never to get my beauty products
from a joke shop again.'
       'Oh, that reminds me. Neville, about the lollipops at the Hallow'een feast...'

       'And this' Professor Grubbly-Plank pointed 'is the foal. Now, the foal is born golden
and hornless, and has occasionally been mistaken by Muggles to be an unusually-coloured horse.
They do not make a distinction between Muggles and wizards as riders, but prefer women of
either group to men. Now, who can tell me what foals eat?'
       Ron stifled a yawn.
       'How about you, Mr Weasley?'
       'Ah. Um...' Hermione, taking pity on him, whispered 'Shrubs and leaves'.
       'Shrubs and leaves.'
       'Very good, Mr Weasley. I would give five points to Gryffindor, but since Miss Granger
told you the answer, I won't.' Hermione blushed. The Slytherins laughed.
       'Now, see, that's what happens when you cheat, Ron' Hermione muttered.
       'Maybe if you'd been a bit quieter?'
       'We still could have heard her. You three are about as subtle as an Erumpent on acid'
someone drawled.
       Ron turned around. ' I don't think anyone asked you, Malfoy.'
       'Yes, but I thought I'd liven up your boring conversation with my presence. Bring a
little light into your life.'
       'Shove it, Malfoy.'
       'I've warned you before about your language, Weasley. Your parents wouldn't like that
at all. Which reminds me, about your brother- I heard he got promoted. Head of the Department
of International Magical Co-Operation.'
       'Not that it's any of your business, but yes.'
       'So, what, they were looking for someone expendable? What, did they just look at their
list of candidates and say 'There's six more where he came from, won't matter if he gets
knocked off'?'
       'Malfoy, I'm telling you now...'
       'Mr Weasley, please pay attention!'
       Ron ignored Draco's satisfied sniggers and turned around to Harry and Hermione. 'I'm
going to kill him. I mean it. If we ever do Quintapeds in Care of Magical Creatures, I wonder
how much you'd have to tip Grubbly-Plank to let me lock him in the pen with them?'
       'More than your family's ever seen in their life.'
       Ron spun around. 'Malfoy, you are really pissing me off...'
       'Mr Weasley!'
       Draco sniggered again. 'Like taking candy from a baby, Weasley. You need to learn to
control yourself.'
       This time, Harry answered. 'I see your boils've gone. What did your father say when you
got off the train at the end of term? 'Keep using that Clearasil, son, it'll get better?''
       Ron laughed. Draco flushed a deep red and looked furious. Harry turned back, with the
satisfaction of a job well done. 'That's how you do it, Ron. You can't just insult him-
he gets that all the time. You've got to attack him personally.'
       'Can't I just hit him?'
       'You could try, Weasley.'
       'This is going nowhere' Hermione said, annoyed.
       'But it's so much fun' Draco drawled. 'And I haven't even started on the really
interesting things from last term yet.'
       This time, Ron did look like he was going to hit Draco. 'I thought I told you to shove
it, Malfoy.'
       The insult match was cut short by the ringing of the huge brass bell that signified the
end of lessons. The class went back to their bags of books, which they had left on the other
side of the pen. As they picked up their bags, Ron asked 'What's next?'
       'Potions.'
       'Oh, damn. I've left the potion up in the Gryffindor tower. Ron, you come with.
Hermione, I don't suppose you could delay Snape for a few minutes while we leg it up to our
dorm?'
       'Delay him how?'
       'That's for you to work out. Come on, Harry, let's go.' Ron, followed by Harry,
pelted across the fields outside Hogwarts. Hermione watched them go.

       'Potion, potion, potion...ah. Here we are.' Ron held up the vial full of glistening
liquid up to the light. 'This is the one. It's gone a bit darker. That's good, right?'
       'Yup. That's your one. Come on, we were supposed to be in Snape's lesson a minute ago.
I hope Herm's come up with a good delaying tactic.'
       Ron didn't reply.
       'Ron?'
       'Don't you think we work her too hard?'
       Harry sat down. 'I know what you mean. She's always helping us out, and I don't care
what she says, her timetable's not the same as everyone else's. She takes four extra subjects,
we only take two.'
       'I know. She's like Percy- she does everything she possibly can, regardless of whether
she can cope. If you ask me, she's heading for another third-year-esque breakdown if we don't
lighten her workload a little. Maybe we can give her a hand with some things...'
       'There's nothing we can help her with. She's the cleverest of all of us- she never
needs help. Hello, what's this?'
       A letter was lying on the bed. Harry picked it up and opened it as Ron came over from
his chair. 'What's that, Harry? Love letter from Millicent Bulstrode?'
       Harry frowned. 'I don't know. There's no address on the envelope, so it's not owl-mail.
Someone must have put it here...'
       He tore open the envelope. A piece of paper fluttered out. 'Let's read it' Ron said.
       They read it.
       'Bloody hell.' Harry said, shocked.
       'All the Mudbloods shall be expelled. None shall corrupt the proud name of Hogwarts any
longer. You shall die along with the scum that infest Hogwarts like a plague unless you join
us. Signed, the Pureblood Alliance.' Ron read. He whistled. 'Well, looks like Slytherin's back
in the game.'
       'How would a Slytherin get into our dorms?' Harry asked. He took another look at the
letter. 'The Pureblood Alliance...damn.'
       He put it down. 'Who would send this?'