Harry Potter and the Shadows of the Watchgate

--------------------------------------------
-*~| CHAPTER 18 - Animagi |~*-
--------------------------------------------

Harry hurriedly shoveled through his breakfast because he had overslept due to a string of incoherent dreams he had been having lately, which had jolted him in between sleep and dream throughout the night.

After finishing his hurried breakfast, he made his way to McGonagall's class along with Ron and Hermione.

Professor McGonagall was already waiting for them in the class. She was standing beside her table and had an air of foreboding calmness around her. When all of them filed through the rows of desks and settled down, she started, "Today, we will learn the most important part of Transfiguration,"--she paused, surveying all the students--"Human Transfiguration."

Everyone fidgeted in their seats as the butterflies started fluttering in many stomachs.

"Human transfiguration is a very precise process, needing your total concentration. It is not difficult when you master it, as there will be some future Animagi among you. But it is not everybody's cup of tea either, because it is rare and highly regulated, as you have to be registered with the Ministry of Magic," she said, her gaze lingering on Harry.

"Human transfiguration is similar to vertebrate transfiguration but the change is that you will be transfiguring yourselves rather than an inanimate object.

"It is always difficult the first time because nobody can foretell what your Animagus form would be. For the first time you have to incant and use your wand for transfiguration but as you get more practice, and exercise the ability, you will be able to transform without using your wand and incantation. It will be similar to your changing clothes, but the new skin that you will wear would be of an animal's, of your Animagus form." McGonagall transformed into her Animagus form and back again in a matter of seconds, which produced quite a few "Ohs" and gasps.

"You need to make your body one with your mind, grasping every pore and sense to reveal the dormant creature in you. I should make it clear early on that not all of you would be able to change into your Animagi forms, because many of you wouldn't be able to get in touch with that dormant part in you and thus would never be able to transform.

"Now, please stand up for the new arrangement."

They all did, obediently.

She waved her wand which made their desks dissolve into the adjacent walls and made the ceiling higher than the Quidditch hoops. With another flick, their class floor was covered with numerous squashy cushions. Some of the students lost their balance because of the sudden appearance of the cushions, like Neville, but many stood still, Harry included. Hermione's faltering figure was saved by the ever helping hand of Ron's.

McGonagall continued, "Make yourself comfortable."

They all sat down ceremoniously. She then instructed them about the incantation and wand movement.

"As I have informed you already, many of you wouldn't be able to transform at all. Which could mean two things: you need more practice or you will not be a future Animagus because your inner creature is either too dormant or does not exist. However, this doesn't mean that you are not an able wizard or witch. It simply tells you that human transfiguration is not for you and your specialty lies some place else.

"When some of you will transform, depending upon the size of your Animagus form, you'll be able to remember your identity. For the first time, you could feel uneasy and confused, that's why I base so much importance on your concentration and undivided attention. So that when you transform, you get familiar with your other form.

"Do NOT panic, if you see that you are surrounded by some animals and the fact that you can't transform. Your first transformation is so tiring and self-consuming that even if you transform into a lion or a dragon for that matter, you wouldn't feel hungry or compelled to eat your fellow students."

Many of them gulped in panic but stood their ground. The class first practiced the incantation without their wands and then started concentrating in shutting every sound and thought from their mind so that they could get in touch with their inner dormant creature, if it existed. In that state, they were to incant the 'Transfiguration Spell' and wait for the transformation to begin.

Harry wasn't very sure that he would be able to transform or not. He had never thought of the fact and he dreaded his Animagi form, before even transforming. I hope it's a stag, he pleaded with his inner self.

Hermione and Ron weren't feeling so confident either as Harry noticed for the first time. Hermione looked worried and her hands were shaking. When she caught him looking at her, she mouthed, "What if I can't transform?" She looked devastated. Ron on other hand had his eyes closed tight shut and was muttering, "Just don't be a weasel, not a weasel!"

Tension gripped him as he concentrated in closing every sound and thought, which wasn't difficult, as he had almost mastered Occlumency. With beating heart and slippery hands from perspiration, he started concentrating hard; closing his mind to all the encroaching sounds, thoughts, fear, until there was nothing left except a part of himself he had never seen or felt before. An unexplored dormant part of him, which had always been there but hadn't been accessed before. He felt himself ready for the transformation as he repeated the incantation with the wand movement.

He felt his body starting to change as his limbs started displacing themselves in a series of movements, a searing pain shot through his scar as the transformation continued and took new turns. He wanted to scream but nothing came out as he forced his eyes tight shut, so that he couldn't see his out of proportioned body.

He felt himself stretch to the limits as every sense of his body was disarrayed. His head pounded, fit to burst as he had a flash of the smoky snake from his dreams. It came gliding towards him with such a force that on impact everything went blank.

As rushing wind, his senses returned. He heard screaming, as he somehow hurtled towards McGonagall fiercely. His vision bleared as he coiled himself around her.

What's happening? ... What am I doing?

A steely talon pierced him somewhere, as he hissed at the cat-form of McGonagall.

No! This is not me! ... Leave me alone! ... Get out... GET OUT... GET OUT!!! he screamed from somewhere dormant, which took all of his energy away. His scar throbbed painfully making him sway and his vision to blur again. His head filled with thousand screams, magnified.

So, is this how people die?

He squirmed in agony but faltered as a new voice joined the screams, overcoming their fierceness and he heard tinkling bells and someone humming:

Let those who rest more deeply sleep,
Let those awake their vigils keep....

I know that voice!!! I recognize it now!

Something uncoiled inside him as his head split open with a piercing scream.

The last thing that he remembered before losing conscience was a hazy form of a bird taking flight.

-*-

He could hear his own heartbeat inside his head. A strong beat of ... dhuk... DHUK... dhuk... DHUK...

Everything was in a blur as he tried to feel some inkling of wakefulness. It was then, when he felt himself moving. Short footsteps echoed in the dark surroundings, as he ambled towards an unknown destination.

"Lumos!"

It was not him speaking but the voice from his dreams... the voice he yearned to hear... the voice of his mother... coming from his own mouth. He was looking at a new world, his mother's world, from her own very eyes. Harry experienced a feeling of weightlessness, as he felt himself somehow in the body of his mother, looking, feeling, sensing whatever she was experiencing.

Her figure faltered as she lifted her wand-hand up to see beyond the beam of light, trying to listen to some inaudible sound.

"Who's there?" she asked firmly.

Someone sighed, and something flickered in front of her. Through the fabric of darkness a tall figure with muddled hair and readied smile emerged.

"James!" Lily exclaimed exasperatedly.

"Er... Hi!" James grinned, stowing away his invisibility cloak inside his robes.

"How many times do I have to tell you, not to follow me everywhere?" she said, shaking her head. "I can take care of myself, you know."

"Honey, but I was worried sick." James swayed on the spot clutching his forehead, while Lily rolled her eyes.

"I wasn't going to wrestle a troll that I needed your help," she said huffily.

"Aaargh!" James clutched at his heart as he pretended to be wounded by her words.

"Oh, James!" She punched him playfully.

"I was just worried. You shouldn't be running to your little escapades now that--"

She silenced him by putting her hand on his mouth. "I am not sick, so don't worry. Everything will be all right. I can almost feel it," she said, smiling at the crook of his neck, while James kissed her forehead affectionately.

"Let's get out of here, shall we?" he said, guiding her.

They walked towards a bright room, which turned out to be a well-lit entrance with flame torches, dwarfed by a towering gate, which was slightly ajar.

Shapes of different creatures glimmered on the door as they seemed to dance with the flickering light of the torches. Lily stopped beside it and extended her hand to touch the cold surface of the gate, running her hands on the ancient scripture surrounding every creature. She stroked the contours of a Dragon, Unicorn, Clawed fish, and Chimaera with her fingers, faltering near the giant snake whose fanged mouth was bared, while its eyes mockingly gleamed with the flames.

Lily gave an involuntary shudder. James placed his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her outside the doorway, which closed by itself with a big thud, causing the flight of many colorful birds from nearby trees. A vast countryside and soft breeze welcomed them outside, which was decorated with knee-length grass, glowing orange trees and flowerbeds, which were scattered all over the place, crowned by a violet sky with an orange halo.

"Still haven't gotten over it?" James asked.

"I don't know, James. I still have a very bad feeling about it." Lily sighed and stared at the orange halo; the strewn remnant of the sun of this world.

"Well, don't worry too much," James said indifferently, but his concerned expression betrayed his words. He turned away and with a series of wand movements opened a Gateway.

"Let's get you ready for the travel," James said turning towards Lily, when a piercing inhuman shriek rang through. Harry's vision bleared with rainbow colors as his scar prickled like it was being stoked up with fire-seeds. He rushed to his own world calling after his parents, "DON'T GO!" and opening his eyes to a hazy room.

"He's awake! Someone, call Madam Pomfrey."

"Call Dumbledore."

"Bring him his glasses."

"Is he all right?"

"Will you all just relax?" Lupin's voice boomed, and silenced everyone.

Harry swept his sweat-drenched face with his sleeve. Two pillows were set against his back as soon as he lifted himself gingerly on the bed by Lupin, while Ron put his glasses on.

Ron, Hermione and Lupin stared at him, waiting for him to speak.

"Er..." He stared back at their long and weary faces and remembered his transformation and the dream-vision after.

"Are you feeling all right, Harry?" Lupin asked concernedly.

"Never been better." He tried the James grin but failed miserably as the trio became more worried by his words.

"What did I do? Is McGonagall all right?" he blurted out the most pressing matter first.

They exchanged looks as Ginny came rushing in with Madam Pomfrey. The Matron checked his pulse and waved her wand three times in front of him as her wand gave out greenish bubbles.

"Well, he seems to be all right, but I would like to keep him for the night," Madam Pomfrey said, in a just-in-case voice.

"Fifteen minutes," she said, pointing to the grandfather clock and made for her office.

"So, now can somebody tell me, what actually happened?" Harry inquired.

"Were you dreaming? Or was it another--"

Ron hurriedly cut off Hermione, "You transformed into a giant snake, Harry. That's what happenedÂ…" From the angry glares that he received, Ron realized that he had not used at ounce of tact.

Hermione swiftly covered the awkward pause. "Well, you gave me a quite a bit of fright when I opened my eyes to check on you; an oversized snake, slithering drunkenly beside me."

"But he wasn't doing anything!" Ron said defensively.

"Yes, he wasn't," Hermione continued while staring at Harry's feet, "but suddenly you just came to life, as if out of a coma or something and lunged at Professor McGonagall, and then... I- I didn't realize what I was doing when--"

"You scuffed him!" Ron said angrily.

"I didn't realize that I had transformed!" Hermione said exasperatedly.

"You could have hurt him!" Ron went on.

"He could have killed Professor McGonagall!" Hermione retorted back.

She gasped and put her hands over her mouth as if she had let loose a swear word. She realized that their little scuffle had blown out of proportion. Ron, Ginny and Lupin stared at Harry for a reaction but didn't get any.

"Is she all right?" Harry asked worriedly, ignoring Hermione's words.

"Yes, your fangs grazed her paw, good that she transformed swiftly. She has been mended and is resting in her room. Dumbledore would have been here but he was urgently needed in Romania," Lupin provided.

"Romania?"

"Seems like Voldemort is broadening his circle and is creating havoc there. He has taken us and the Ministry by surprise, as we've been only concentrating in the areas near London but now we have to expand our circle too," Lupin informed gravely.

"And I'm really sorry, Harry. Honestly, I didn't mean to--" Hermione was cut off by Harry.

"No need to apologize, really. I should've had more control over my actions."

"But it wasn't you, Harry," Ron said, eyeing him closely.

"Yes, it wasn't totally me but I was there somewhere, because I felt the transformation and him; Voldemort was inside of me. Maybe because all of my guards were down as I was fully concentrating on the transformation... He was so happy... but then my mother came and saved me," he said, with a smile.

"Say what?" inquired Ron, disbelievingly.

"Lily?" Lupin asked, scrunching his eyebrows.

Harry told them about the dreams he had been having since July, the changing colors and a familiar voice. How he had considered the voice all along to be familiar but couldn't rightly put his finger on it--he omitted the part, when he had thought that he was going tp die because his head seemed to split with all the screaming. His mother's voice had came to his rescue and blocked every encroaching sound, engulfing him in total peace.

"That's why, as soon as you coiled yourself around Professor McGonagall, you flinched like you were electrocuted or something and uncoiled yourself with the same speed," Ron wondered loudly.

"You fainted after that and for few minutes we were in a fix because you weren't breathing, like you were being asphyxiated," said Hermione.

"I don't know myself, what actually happened after that. When I came to, I was at an unfamiliar place.... So, you were the bird?" Harry enquired curiously.

"Yes, an eagle." Hermione smiled nervously.

"I tried to stop you but didn't realized what I was doing till I jabbed you. I panicked and took flight--"

"And transformed in midair." Ron cackled, while Hermione gave him an injured look. "Lucky, there were all those cushions." Ron grinned while all of them tried to smile.

"An unfamiliar place?" Lupin said curiously, repeating Harry's words.

Harry told them about his vision of another world, his parents and the magnanimous Gate.

"You saw it all through Lily's eyes?" Lupin asked disbelievingly.

"Yes, my mother's eyes."

"She touched the giant snake on the gate and flinched. Did she know about me then?" he asked Lupin.

"I don't think so, Harry. It must have reminded her of Voldemort. You should tell Dumbledore everything in detail. Maybe he knows about this place."

"Have you been to another world, Lupin?" Harry asked Lupin.

"No I haven't, but your parents and Sirius have. Numerous times," Lupin said gravely.

"Did you see where she was coming from?" Ginny spoke for the first time.

"No, it was all dark." Harry noticed Ginny for the first time after coming to--there were dark circles around her eyes, like she hadn't slept for days.

"A broken sun did you say?" Lupin inquired.

"Yes, that's what my mother thought when she saw it and there were golden trees--"

"And colorful birds," Ginny said slowly.

"Yes, I've already told you that," Harry said, staring at Ginny.

"Half an hour has passed." Madam Pomfrey did her time-check coming inside the ward, which his friends had dubbed the 'Potter-Ward' because he always somehow found his way into it.

"We'll see you tomorrow then, mate," said Ron.

"Take care," said Hermione, pressing his right hand.

"Sleep well and practice Occlumency," Lupin advised in a whisper and waited for others to join him at the entrance.

Ginny simply stared at him for sometime with an expression like she wanted to say something, but deciding against it, turned away and made for the exit.

Harry stared after her for some time; he didn't know why but his heart was aching.

He sidled down on the bed but stopped midway when he felt pain shoot from his left calf. On close examination, he discovered an angry talon shaped bruise, which Madam Pomfrey had overlooked.

This would always remind me of my first and last transformation... Professor McGonagall was right, Transfiguration is not everybody's cup of tea.

-*-

It was not long before Harry was freed from the Hospital, much to his relief, to amble about the great expanses of Hogwarts. Not to mention the partial secret places where students kept on popping about; because of which a private moment, a lonesome stroll was hard to come by. The more Harry wanted to get away from the crowd, the more he became surrounded by students whispering along with their furtive glances. It seemed to him that he was surrounded by an occult group chastising him day and night.

As usual, the news of his transformation into a giant snake, spread about faster than a pelting Firebolt. It was the new buzzword, the new source of Slytherins to publicly ridicule him, every chance they got. Malfoy, much to his joy, had ceremoniously taught all the Slytherins--young and old--to corner him everywhere they saw fit.

The remaining houses were not speaking up so loudly but they were afraid of him, all the same. Gryffindors didn't much care, as they were getting used to such circumstances every year but the first-years were still young, therefore, prone to all the rumors and dawdled wherever they saw him.

It had become quite usual to hear Slytherins shouting on the top of their voices, balderdash like:

"Hey, Potter! Nice sleeks."

"Potter! Want to convert?"

"Potter! Can I see your fangs?"

"Are you sure, you are not Slytherin himself or the Dark Lord's son?"

"Do you suck blood too?"

Peeves's bawdy poetry was modified and many versions were droned on and on by all the Slytherins endlessly.

"Oh Potter you rotter, Oh, what have you done?
You're slinking off teachers now; you think it's good fun?"

"Here goes a Potty,
Whose head is so clotty;
He thinks he's a hotty,
When he's really a dotty!"

It was his second-year all over again except with a perverse twist. As the doubts of him becoming the next Dark Lord became apparent; the qualms of him destroying the wizarding community and Hogwarts were discussed by all and sundry.

Hermione repeated her 'ignore them' mantra over and over again, using her Prefect powers to shove off students from their path. Ron offered now and then to hex every other student who kept on bursting by.

But Harry was almost detached from his surrounding, in the whirlpool of his own mind. He didn't even notice Malfoy saying lewd words behind his back, Snape remarking on his smallest of mistakes as if he had made the blunder of his life, frightened students clearing his path, Ron and Hermione bickering in their usual manner, and a very tired Ginny.

-*-

The first instance that he got, he made for Professor McGonagall's office. With a beating heart, drumming abnormally against his chest, he entered her office. She was seated comfortably on her desk, reading a foot long parchment. She noticed him before he could present a normal posture.

"Potter, are you all right?" she asked worriedly, taking off her reading glasses and examining him closely.

"I should ask you the same question, Professor McGonagall," he replied sheepishly. "I am very sorry, Professor, I never intended--"

"I thought you were intelligent enough to disregard such diminutive circumstances," she replied looking astounded, cutting him in between his long monologue that he had carefully rehearsed for her. She looked him straight in the eye for awhile and then smiled amusingly.

"When I took that class, I knew I was taking a big risk, as Dumbledore had pointed out to me earlier. However, I wanted to make sure, so that no more surprises were left out, to put it mildly. As we know, there is still so much undiscovered strength and power in you," she said, looking at him directly.

"Did you know that I would transform into a snake?" Harry asked, streaking past the word 'giant'.

"No, I didn't know as I'm no Seer," she replied waving her hand, as if she was warding off an unusually annoying fly. "However, I was ready for something unexpected and that certainly did happen when you transformed into a Python."

"I have decided not to become an Animagus, Professor," he said, bowing his head.

She started thoughtfully, "I can understand. It's totally up to you.... If I were you, Potter, I would be more concerned about getting my Advanced Training. Now, that you know what lies in your future.... If you haven't noticed, Potter, in your being injured and all the uncanny situations that you land in, you always come through. And I know that you have borne not only physical scars but wounds deep down that we can't see. However, you have the potential of becoming a great wizard, so just get yourself ready."

Harry didn't know what to say, it was like someone had turned on a bright bulb inside his head.

"So, just pay no heed to all those who mock you. As I specifically don't want any brawl to break out when Dumbledore's away," she reasoned matter-of-factly, dismissing him obliquely by putting her glasses on and returning to her foot long parchment.

~*~