Every Guy has a Soft Spot for a Cat

Harry and Butterwick bundled up for the chilly fall weather enthusiastically.

"Hogsmeade is going to be great," Harry mused.

"And why are you bringing your cat?" asked Ron.

Harry held Butterwick up cheerfully. "That's the whole point, Ron. It's a kitty bonding trip!"

"You've lost your marbles," Ron spat in disgust. "That cat has turned you all...funny!"

Harry rolled his eyes. "Oh Ron, don't be ridiculous."

"You've gone all ninny-like and soft! It's weird."

Ron took Harry by the shoulders. "Harry, I won't let this evil feline turn you into some kind of poofter."

"Ron, I--"

"The sharp appearance. The fanciful remarks. Pretty soon you'll be prancing around and kissing boys like Draco Malfoy!"

Harry gave him an offended look. "Ron, I am going to pretend I never heard that, and when I get back from this kitty bonding trip...you had better have the right attitude about Butterwick!"

He turned on his heels and glided out the door angrily.

Ron sighed and sat down reluctantly. "Something pretty fucking weird is going on around here."

***

Draco sulked, his head resting on his arms as they splayed out across his small but surprisingly luxurious writing desk.

Pansy entered the room and sat beside him cautiously. "Draco..."

"No, Pansy, I'm afraid I don't feel much like prancing around and kissing any boys today."

"Oh." She turned around and eyed the Ravenclaw standing in the doorway. "You can go, Michael. He doesn't seem up to it today."

Draco perked up. "Is that Michael Corner?" He smiled a bit. "I suppose maybe a little prancing and such would do me some good..."

Pansy rolled her eyes and made her way out of the room as Draco bounded over to the other boy and took him by the shirt in some sort of half-hearted cheerful sorrow.

10 minutes later.

"Oh Pansy, I'm afraid that didn't help a bit. It was lovely, but not a bit...I still miss Harry..." Draco draped himself on the black couch beside her.

Pansy frowned. "Any news from Mysterious Person?"

"Um...not really..." He dug in his pockets. "Just this one that reads: The squirrels are in the basement. Their take over is imminent. I must find help. I must--Ps. A bit off my rocker when I wrote that, but I thought I'd send it to you anyway just for kicks."

Pansy bent over to retrieve a wad of paper that tumbled out of the blonde's robes. "What's this/"

"That would appear to be some sort of wad of paper, I believe," Draco replied matter-of-factly.

She opened it.

Hello again, Draco.

May you prosper in all your poofy endeavors. Here's a poem for you listening (as I'm sure that one of companions is reading this out loud) pleasure:

Twins in title

This pair is quite smitten

One is a hero

The other a kitten

One you shall love

The other you do

So go seek thine enemy

Or I'll turn you into poo

Yes...well, rhymes are a bit tricky, but you get the idea.

Love,

Mysterious Person

"That's curious," Pansy muttered.

"Doesn't settle too well on the ears though," said Draco. "This Mysterious Person really isn't much of a poet."

She scowled. "That's not the point, Draco. This is a clue."

Blank stare.

"To where you cat is!"

He blinked. "Oh..."

"So...."

"So?"

"So start deciphering!"

He gave her an offended look. "Fine..."

She concentrated on the message.

Draco furrowed his brow. "Hm... The squirrels are in the basement..."

"Damn it, Draco!"

"What?"

***

The library was unnervingly silent as various groups of students worked, scribbling away diligently.

Draco was lazily flipping the pages of his book, pretending he was reading and certainly not scoping out cute fifth years over in the reference section, when an epiphany came upon him.

He jumped up.

"Oh, I get it now! 'So go seek thine enemy.' The Gryffindors! I'm supposed to go to the Gryffindor tower!"

Everyone in the general vicinity glared at him. A table of third year Gryffindors gave him particularly nasty looks.

Pansy scowled and yanked him back into his chair.

"I figured it out," he said triumphantly, a stupid grin on his face. He folded his arms and gave her a smug look. "I'm a genius."

She ignored him. "Of course you are."

"Soon I shall have my revenge, and my darling kitty shall be returned to me once again!"

He scowled as someone flung a book at his head.

"How dare you interrupt my vendetta! I glare at you reproachfully...REPROACHFULLY!!!"