When Everything Goes Wrong

BACK AT THE APARTMENT!!!

Hermione, Harry and Ron: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!

Sarah & Draco: SHUT UP!!!!!

Andrea: * mumbling * Stupid blonde idiotic gay lesbian that doesn't know how to mind her own business.

Sarah: * looks at Draco * I am never taking you anywhere with me if you do that again. If Andrea didn't cause that guy to streak then we would be behind bars right now.!!

Paulina: I hope that never happens again. You've been in jail enough to have your own personal cell.

Sarah: Did you see who it was that she made streak?? EWWWWW!! * Starts to turn green *.

Andrea: What? Who was it? I wasn't actually looking you know.

Sarah: * shudder * Let's not revisit that place!

Andrea: What?? Who was it???

Sarah: Well * shudders * that was Avery. EWWW!!! BAD MENTAL IMAGE!!! EWWWW!!! * Starts to run around the room screaming *.

Andrea: O...dear...god....

Paulina: Umm... who is Avery??

Sarah: * stops running * Avery is a Death Eater, who betrayed Voldemort and is now rotting in hell. Along with the rest of them.

Draco: Avery . . . I remember him . . . ugly . . . EWWW so it was him streaking!?!?!?!? * Sarah nods her head * OH DEAR GODS!!! * Draco runs to the bathroom to puke *.

Andrea: Man...Am I ever glad that I never saw that!

Sarah: OH MY!!! I just remembered it again. * puts hand over mouth and runs to bathroom *.

Paulina: Well, I am glad I didn't see it. * looks at Harry, Ron and Hermione * Well did you have a nice lunch?

* They all stare at the food that they never got to reach *.

All three: NO!

* Sarah and Draco come back from the bathroom and sit on the couch, looking green *.

Paulina: Come to think of it...we never ate did we?

Draco: Please don't talk about food? I can't stomach it.

Andrea: Ok...but I'm still hungry...* looks at leftovers and begins to eat *.

Harry: Umm can we have something to eat, or at least untie one of our hands?!?!?!

* All three look dreamily at the food and give puppy dog eyes *

Sarah: * sigh * Fine * unties one hand each and grabs some leftovers *.

* Andrea and Paulina turn the three around because they don't like people watching them when they eat *.

Harry: HEY!

Draco: Shut up Potter! * Still holding his abdomen and still looking green * Too many pixy stick make Draco go crazy.

* Draco and Sarah grab some more pixie sticks, while Andrea and Paulina are eating leftovers and don't notice *.

* Harry, Ron, and Hermione start whining and make a whole bunch of noise that the neighbors are pounding on the door to make them shut up *.

Sarah: *screams at neighbors * SHUT UP YOU FREAKEN ASSHOLES, I AM EATING OVER HERE AND I DON'T COMPLAIN WHEN YOU HAVE SEX!!!

Draco: O_O I'll just pretend that I didn't hear that.

Andrea: * mumbles * Yeah, try not hearing when the neighbors are having sex.

Sarah: Yeah, man can they be loud * shudders and shakes head *.

Everyone else: SHUT UP!!!

Sarah: * looks at them * What?!? It's true!

Andrea: * finishes eating * Now what are we going to do?

* All of a sudden an owl smacks into the window *.

Sarah: * gets up and walks to window * Stupid freaking bird that can't do anything right.

Sarah: * opens window and bird flies in * Umm . . . Andrea, did we by any chance forget another meeting???

Andrea: Why do you ask?

Sarah: Just making sure this letter doesn't explode. So did we?

* Sarah hands Andrea the letter * Here your turn to open it.

Andrea: * gets agenda book and looks through it * No . . . we didn't miss anything...is it a howler?

Sarah: Thinks so, can't really tell. It's a bit burnt. Here * shoves letter into Andrea's hands *.

Andrea: * nervously opens it and . . . nothing happens * Umm...ok...nothing happened.

Draco: That's good isn't it?

Paulina: Well go on read it.

Andrea: Ok...* pulls letter out and starts to read it *.

Dear Ron's kidnappers

We are very surprised to hear that you have kidnapped Ron . . . we didn't even know that he was gone. In order to get our son back we are willing to give you whatever that you wanted, a.k.a. one Weasleys Wizards Wheezes. If you will tell us what time and date to make the exchange, we will be more than willing to do so.

Sincerely

The Weasley Family

Andrea: Ok...they were strangely cheerful.

Sarah: * raises eyebrow * Yeah too cheerful. They aren't even taking this seriously.

Draco: Here let me see * takes the letter from Andrea, takes out wand and mumbles a spell * Well they wrote this. That's for sure.

Ron: But Fred and George would never give up there Joke Shop. They spent so much time and money on it.

Sarah: Boo ho, cry me a river Weasley.

* Ron starts crying uncontrollably *.

Paulina: Umm . . . Ok . . . that's a BIT freaky now Sarah.

Sarah: * rolls eyes * OK I didn't mean it literally, so stop.

Hermione: Bit strange though, really. I didn't think that they would give it up that easily. Or give it up at all.

Ron: * stops crying * OH GEE THANKS!!! You said that as though they don't give a damn about me.

Harry: *mumbles * They don't.

Hermione: HARRY! Don't worry Ron . . . I'm sure they're thinking only of your well being.

Andrea: Yeah . . . fat chance of THAT being true.

* Ron starts to cry again * Draco: Would you shut up Weasley!!!!

* Suddenly Sarah's cell phone rings *.

Sarah: * takes out phone * Hello! * take phone quickly away from ear *.

* On the other line it was Lucius still looking for his son *.

Lucius: BWAHAHAHA!!! WHERE IS MY SON? DID YOU FIND HIM YET?? * Starts to sob into phone *.

Andrea: * mumbles * O dear god.

Draco: * looks horrified that his dad is such a prissy person *.

Sarah: LUCIUS MAN PULL YOUR SELF TOGETHER!!!!

Lucius: * sobbing * Did you find my son yet?

Andrea: Strange . . . I didn't think he was emotional like this.

Sarah: No we didn't find him, but when we do I'll tell you, so leave me alone.

Lucius: * still sobbing * Ok.

* Sarah hangs up the phone before he starts crying again *.

Sarah: * turns to Draco who is trying to be as small as possible * Man your man is like a bit too emotional.

Draco: * mumbles * Yeah . . . I guess he can be . . . a bit . . .

Harry: A BIT, HE WAS LIKE HYSTERICAL!!!!

Draco: SHUT UP POTTER!!! * whips his wand out and is about to do a hex on him *.

* Paulina throws herself at Harry to protect him * NO NOT HARRY!!! DON"T TOUCH HIM!!

Sarah: Umm.

Andrea: O_O.

Draco: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!!

Sarah: * mumbles * A lot of things.

Andrea: * mumbles back * That's for sure.

* Sarah takes out wand and moves Paulina with Wingardium Leviosa * There!!

Draco: Good *gives strange look to Paulina *.

Paulina: * still in mid air * NOOOO NOT HARRY!!! * tries to get down, but fails miserably *.

Draco: * aims at Harry * Rictusempra!

* Harry doubles up (as best he can while tied to a chair) and wheezes *.

Paulina: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! * Starts to cry like Lucius Malfoy *.

Andrea: * talks to Sarah * Uh . . . what's wrong with her?

Sarah: Umm I have no idea. * looks at Paulina who is still in mid air * I think she should go home and I'll just wipe her memory.

Paulina: NOOO!!!! * Starts to glow freakishly as Sarah's mind wiping spell bounces off her and hits Hermione instead *.

Hermione: Where am I? Who are you people?

Andrea: Umm . . . ok that could have gone better.

Sarah: Damn! * puts Paulina down * Obliviate * Paulina's eyes glaze over and Sarah pushes her out the door *.

Draco: Ok . . . that friend of yours is freakishly strange . . . what was that weird glow?

Hermione: Why am I tied to a chair? Who am I?

Harry and Ron: Umm...Hermione?

Sarah: Umm I really don't know why the hell she is glowing like that. I'll ask Voldie next meeting. * turns to Andrea * By the way when is our next meeting?

Andrea: * looks through agenda again * OH HOLY HELLHOLE!!! IT STARTS NOW!!!!

Sarah: * spins around and faces Andrea * WHAT!!!?!?!?!?!?!? WHAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING HERE THEN!!!!!

* Sarah starts to run around room not knowing what to do * OK DO WE TAKE POTTER, OR MALFOY.!?!?!?! * Uncontrollably shakes Ron *.

*Andrea starts freaking out as well * FREAK MAN!!! JUST GRAB ONE AND LET'S GO!!!!!

Sarah: * grabs Hermione and starts to run for the door * Wait. I can apparate.

Andrea: WHY THE HELL ARE YOU TAKING THE MUDBLOOD!?!?!??!!?

Sarah: * stops mid run * Well you said to get one of them, so I did.

Andrea: I meant Draco or Harry dumb ass . . . what's Voldemort going to do with her?

Sarah: * pouts * But I still haven't tortured him and I like Draco's company.

Andrea: Ok then...we'll just say that we haven't found them yet.

Sarah: Ok! * Takes out wand and with a pop she is gone *.

Ok Sorry for the short chapters but we hope that they are funny.

If you have any suggestions for the next chapter just tell us when you review.

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TBC