Retrospection

Chapter Four--Reminiscing

"Yes. I definitely do mind traveling," Susy muttered to herself as she returned from the bathroom to her aisle seat in First Class. As long as she didn't look out the window and reminded herself of how high they were in the air, the only feeling she would have was nausea for the remainder of the flight. Why couldn't we have taken a boat? she thought.

"Feeling any better, dear?" Ms. Rouselore inquired as Susy sat down next to her.

"Not particularly. I wish that there was a way we could just 'poof' ourselves from one spot to another--like magic."

"Perhaps someday," Ms. Rouselore replied nonchalantly. "Now, Susy--you don't mind if I call you by your first name? And will you please call me Lori?" After Susy nodded, she continued, "Personnel records only reveal so much and as you're going to be hearing about my life incessantly for the next few months, why don't you tell me something about yourself. Perhaps it will take your mind off the flight and your vertigo."

"Well, alright, Ms. Rouse--Lori. But I don't think my life is really that exciting."

"Let me be the judge of that, dear."

"Well, I've been at the Salt Lake Times for almost a year--of course, you knew that. Before that, I went to the university down in Provo. I felt like--like I didn't know anything, so I took classes all year long in every subject I could. I decided that I needed to finish sometime, so I graduated in journalism and moved on with my life."

"Yes, yes, dear." Lori interrupted. "I read all that in your file. Why don't you tell me about your childhood? Your parents? There didn't seem to be anything about them in your file."

"Well…I don't really know them."

"You don't?" It was the first time Susy had seen Lori look surprised.

The truth had to come out sometime, and this, Susy felt, was as good as any. "You see--about four years ago I was in a sort of accident and I have no memories of anything prior."

"How awful. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"No. All the doctors I've been to have said that it's the strangest type of amnesia they've ever seen. They keep promising that someday I'll regain those years, but half the time I think they're just trying to make me feel better. I don't know my exact age, where I'm from, or even if someone is still out there looking for me."

"Dear me! However do you manage?"

"Well, Jarett's been really supportive..."

"Jarett?" Lori sounded as if she was hoping to find more than friendship behind the name. And perhaps if he were telling the story she might be satisfied, but Susy had never allowed herself to feel more than friendship for Jarett.

"He's the 'errand boy' in editorials at the Salt Lake Times. Four years ago he found me dangling from a cliff up Provo Canyon with this dazed look on my face. I had several nasty bruises and no memory at all. He was the one who took me to hospital for treatment and later tried to help me rediscover who I was. All I had on me besides my clothing was a letter from a pen friend in Romania. From that letter I found out my name and Jarett did a little searching and found that I was registered for classes in September and had an apartment down the street from his. I'm sorry, Lori, I’m probably boring you."

"No. Please continue."

"Jarett tried everything he could to help me regain my memory. We watched Star Wars, ate pizza, went roller-skating--I sometimes wonder if it was his excuse for a date--but nothing worked. It was like I was experiencing everything for the first time. Overall, Jarett's just been a wonderful friend."

"Have you tried searching for your family in England, dear? You do have a British accent."

"My pen friend's family lives in England. He did some searching for me once when he went to visit them, but nothing came up."

"That's too bad. Have you ever had a part of your memory return?"

"No. I had to start my life over from scratch. Last year I finally gave up that my family--if I have one--would find me. I felt it was time to move on in this new life that I created."

"That's tragic, dear. If I can help with anything, don't hesitate to ask." Lori gave her a smile and Susy felt like there was something more behind her offer of assistance. That's ridiculous, Susy thought; after all she's doing to help me.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

It had been a long day with an even longer flight. Susy collapsed onto the bed that would become her own for the next few months. It was a really comfortable hotel room; however, Susy had a hard time relaxing. Her head was still spinning from the airplane and her nerves were extremely tense. Not to mention that being on the highest floor of the hotel was not helping her fear of heights.

As she reached to turn off the lamp on the nightstand to try to get some sleep, she remembered the letter from her pen friend that she found the night before at home in the stack of bills and credit card applications. She had forgotten about it until now and luckily remembered to bring it along. Perhaps, she thought, it will help me to calm down and relax.

Dear Susy,

Thanks for the advice. I agree that avoiding reporters usually would be the right way to avoid criticism, but not talking to this reporter usually just makes things worse. She's made my dad and elder brother look like fools last year and is now writing nasty articles about my youngest brother's friends. At times I feel like doing the world a service and turning the other way while accidentally letting one of animals I take care of loose while she's around, but I think my mum would kill me when she found out that I was the reason her woman's magazine no longer had it's star reporter.

I thought I would be able to go home in June for a holiday, but with my time off last August for the World Cup it's not likely I'll be able to unless it's work-related. I wish you could see it, my home that is. I think Mum's going to outdo herself with the garden this year, if she can keep the pests off it. She says thanks for the zucchini seeds and the recipe for zucchini bread that you sent. She enjoys cooking new things and my dad doesn't mind it too much. Now, if some of my brothers were there, it would be another story. Ron doesn't object to anything as long as there's chocolate involved, but he's not too fond of vegetables.

I've got to go. One of the drag animals has gotten out. Write back soon.

-Eddie

What a shame, Susy thought. I wish I could finally meet my faithful correspondent. Wouldn't he be surprised!