The Yearbook Septet

Twinkle Toes

Harry, Ron and a strangely daring and out-of-character Hermione were hidden beneath the Invisibility Cloak outside Professor Snape's private quarters. According to the Marauders Map, Snape was in bed within and had been for the last three hours.

Silently, Harry unlocked the door with a well-placed charm and the trio crept into the room. Although they may as well have barged in guns a-blazing, horses whinnying and announced their arrival over a sound system for all the difference it would have made. Snape snored loudly enough to wake the undead.

Hermione slipped into the bathroom while Harry and Ron explored the rest of the room, and she emerged minutes later clutching an empty bottle labelled 'Mr Magical Muscle Extra Strong Shampoo' and another bottle now filled with 'Mr Icky's Duel Purpose Hair and Axle Grease'.

Thirty minutes and lots of charm practise later, and the deed was done. All mirrors had been expertly enchanted to show only what the user expected, all portraits had been blackmailed into keeping quiet and Snape's alarm clock had been altered to squawk ten minutes before the end of breakfast. All tracks had been covered.

~

The next morning, the full student body was greeted with the sight of a curly haired Snape dressed in pink 'I love One True Voice' robes and scowling not-so-menacingly at anyone who dared to blink in his presence.

By evening, he was still blissfully unaware that anything had changed. That was, until his beloved kitten Twinkle Toes happily settled in his lap rather than fleeing terrified, tail between legs.

"POTTER!"

The yell reverberated around the whole Hogwarts castle from Dumbledore's office to the Chamber of Secrets. Which was unfortunate for Snape because Harry was currently on the Quidditch Pitch snogging Draco Malfoy.

*~*~*~*~*

Jelly

Ron had heard a rumour that Malfoy was afraid of jelly. Apparently, he was disturbed by the way it wibbled. That was why Ron was currently sat at the back of the Potions classroom trying his damn hardest to remember a spell he had - shock horror! - researched the previous night.

His face was screwed up in fierce concentration, an expression that would have looked entirely out of place on Ron at the best of times, let alone in his least favourite lesson with the evil, menacing, annoying toe rag that was Snape lecturing the class about the advantages of Diet Pepsi in comparison to Diet Coke.

The light bulb that went ting was almost visible above the red head's right ear. Smirking cunningly like something that's extremely cunning, Ron stood up quickly, wand raised in anticipated victory.

"Ooh, head rush..." He swayed briefly on the spot before regaining his composure and, wand pointed at the ceiling, he bellowed "Wibblius Wobblium," at the top of his voice. Ron and his wand performed a number of complicated twirly patterns whilst he hopped on the spot and patted his right elbow with his left hand, and a sudden flash of bright pink light engulfed the entire room.

When the strawberry and cream flavoured smoke had dissipated, it became clear what Ron had done.

One platinum blond student ran for his life, girlishly high pitched screams reverberating off the old crumbly stone walls of the corridor outside the classroom, getting quieter and quieter like when Gandalf falls down the hole after waving his walking stick at the Balrog - oops, sorry, wrong franchise.

Ron had successfully transfigured all the tables into Rowntrees Strawberry Jelly. Professor McGonagall would have been proud.