Like, Oh Say, Ted Tonks

Chapter 3: A Close Encounter of the Lady Lily Kind

The first day of class was decent. Professor Binns rambled about some old house-elf welfare organization that was toppled by Gwendolyn Black, who believed that house-elves' rights were secondary to those of wizards. I felt myself slink back in my desk. I find that my ancestors are often mentioned in History of Magic, often doing dastardly deeds to further hinder the wizarding world.

Oh, goodie. I'm descended from a bunch of heartless fiends.

I wish Professor Binns would hurry up and die. Everyone in the entire school knows he's going to die sooner than later, seeing as he's about a million years old. No, a million and two. Or a million and four. Around that age.

"And now for some current events," Professor Binns remarked. Everyone sat there in their lethargic stupor only History of Magic could induce. I don't think I ever saw anyone blink in that class. I happened to enjoy current events. You know, besides the fact that even more of my relatives are mentioned there.

" 'According to some witnesses, a fanatic cult called the Death Eaters murdered an innocent witch. On Saturday, Meadow Abbott's family and friends bid their dear friend goodbye. Miss Abbott, aged 27, was a Healer at St. Mungo's, and will be sorely missed at home and at work. The Death Eaters are a cult of followers of a Lord Voldemort, who promises to rid the world of Muggles and Muggle-born. 'I knew there was something wrong with her when I saw that hideous sign above her flat,' Brunhild Abbott, Meadow's mother, aged 56, told us. The sign was described to us as a skull with a snake crawling out of the mouth. The Ministry would like to remind you that if you suspect that an illicit Death Eater activity has occurred at your house to kindly come to their London office and report the aforementioned activity'," Professor Binns read from the Daily Prophet. My peers reacted in the most blasé way, but my heart sank. My sister and her nice friends I met in the back closet just two days had slaughtered an innocent woman, whose only fault was that her blood wasn't as pure as they would have liked.

And all this issue got was a brief mention on the sixth page in the front section of the Daily Prophet? Just wait until they start murdering Ministry officials. They'll be flipping out then.

~

As I left the History of Magic classroom to go to Transfiguration with McGonagall, Ted hollered at me, "Andy, Andy! Wait for me!"

Obediently, I tapped my foot as hundreds of students passed me by. Ted finally caught up with me and said, "Well, I listened to current events today."

"Isn't it awful?"

"Seems like you're related to a bunch of people devoid of feelings," Ted said, looking at the stone floor. "Do your parents know that your sister's going around killing people for fun?"

"Oh, they think it's great. Sweet little Bella's purifying the race of wizards, bettering the world in the name of purebloods."

"No wonder it's hell at your house."

"Yeah, in between the whole being shoved at boring blokes by my skeletal mum and having an evil sister, life's no picnic."

We just stood there, and I was just waiting for something to happen, when something did happen.

The Marauders, that is.

"'Ello, dear cousin o' mine!" my cousin Sirius Black said, patting me on the back. I looked at him with my eyebrows raised. Sirius is quite a character. Everyone at the school knows who he is, and not only because he's the first Black ever to go to Gryffindor. No, it was more for his dashing Black good looks (how did I get skipped over?). "How's life treating you nowadays?"

"Decent."

"Decent? That's all? What about your boyfriend?" Sirius asked. His three little friends were standing behind him, waiting for him to get done talking to his swotty cousin, most likely.

"He's not my boyfriend," I said, gritting my teeth and grabbing the lapels of Sirius's shirt. "Go play Quidditch or ask that poor Lily Evans girl out for the little bat again."

Sirius's dark eyes grew wide. He pointed his index finger at me and shook it at me. "You...you know too much, Black!"

"Aw, shut up," I said, sick to death of my dear but somewhat mentally challenged cousin.

~

"Miss Black, are you even caring to take any notes?" Professor Rookwood asked me. Of course not.

"Yes, yes, I am," I said, deciding to use what Josie and I called the "bluff" method. I dug around for a piece of looseleaf paper (I highly preferred it over the parchment I had to write reports on) and held it up to my eyes. "Ah, yes, for an Invisibility Potion, insert eight newt's toes into the cauldron..."

"Very well," the old greaseball muttered, getting out of my face. He went on ranting and raving about potions. Who cared about potions? They took too long to make, and plus for most potions, there was a charm that took half the time it takes to get all the ingredients and boil them to a simmer.

By the time class was over, my skin was calling out to the sun. So my limbs dashed outside to the warm, warm sun. It was a mini-jubilee, until a very angry redhead walked over to me, fists clenched.

"Andromeda Black! I don't believe you!"

Oh my. I wasn't expecting a fireball attack on this fine afternoon. Fireball's face was deep red and her eyes were a light green, absolutely livid with something I did, apparently. Which I found a tiny bit hard seeing as I didn't even know her.

"Er, who are you?"

"Oh, you know who I am!" she roared.

"Um...no?"

"'Go ask that Lily Evans girl out for the little bat'," she quoted me. Oh, she was...Lily Evans. I'm in deep shit now. "Do you know how many times I've told James Potter no? I'll tell you: I've told him no practically my whole life!"

Why was I being blamed for a prat fourteen-year-old boy's persistence? Lily put her left hand to her forehead and swept her red mane back and let it sit there. She took some breaths and basically just stood there. "Oh, Christ, I am so sorry. You think I'm a bitch, right?" More along the lines of fireball.

"I swear, I'm not usually so histrionic, it's just that...well, it's pretty much impossible to pass Rookwood's class and I've been working my arse off trying to pass and it's only the first damn day!" Lily sighed.

I felt a feminine bond between Lily and I. I don't know if it was the fact that we were both overachieving, green-eyed drama queens or if it was the fact that we were both forced to deal with Sirius or what. "Ah, don't worry. By the seventh year, your will to fight dies. Even my mum, who's way big on grades, is getting over the fact that I constantly fail Potions."

I thought more. Damn, I needed that good grade for my N.E.W.T.s. What was I supposed to tell the people at St. Mungo's? "Oh, yes, I am good at everything except Potions, especially of the healing variety, may I please fill out an application?"

"But what about the O.W.L.s? If I do poorly on the O.W.L.s, what am I supposed to do with my career? I'm going to be a virtual failure and no one will ever want to be around me and...my God! I have to go! Bye, Andromeda!" Lily waved.

I blinked. "A wee high-maintenance, there, Lily!" I yelled after her. But she was probably too locked up in her own little "knowledge-is-power!" world.

"I see you had a close encounter of the Lady Lily kind," Sirius said, stretching out his vowels obnoxiously. He started to take long steps around me, making me feel very much like a guppy being circled by a shark.

"No kidding. She's a bit mental, I must say," I said.

"Yes. That must be what Jamesie's looking for in a girl, though," Sirius rest his elbow on my shoulder.

"Siri," I said, smiling sweetly.

"Yes, dear cousin o' mine?"

"Get lost."