The Eighth Weasley

Notes: Happy New Year!

I’m finally back at my OWN room in my loverly little uni-provided chalet (And yes, I actually live in a chalet in Scotland - have you ever heard anything so odd in your life? :D Its not even a cottage - its a ‘chalet’! I live in an oddly-named wooden box! Go me!) and I’m back on my computer (obviously)! WHOOHOO!!

Have you any idea how much I’ve missed this thing in the two weeks that I was at home? I was ready to tear my hair out in frustration, cos I’m only allowed an hour on the computer a day at home (and that includes net time and when I have at least 5 e-mail accounts that’s not a good thing) - this was hell for me. Normally, I can spend as long as I like on the computers and do what I like!

Anyway, this chapter was plotted when I was at home and I’ve been dying to write it, but now that I can, I’m betting it won’t come together at all considering my mind has been taken over by a LoTR/HP crossover.

I fear my mind.

Actually, come to think of it, I fear myself (and not just for the fact that I’m perving over the movie-Wormtongue in TTT - he may be sleazy, but hey! He looks good in black and he’s a bad guy :D Gotta love ‘em!).

But anyway, back to the HP/LoTR fic thing - I mean, how many people can say they actually read LoTR and Simarillion several times over, as well as re-reading the Hobbit just to check the basic background material was vaguely right for what MIGHT be a crossover, but might not come to anything?

And yes, you ARE having to wade through a lot of crap to get to the fic, those of you who are reading this! But this IS actually my advanced excuse for slow output for the next six months! Honestly! I write too much!

The LoTR/HP thing is definitely coming to something for those of you who are interested (cos honestly, since I’ve brushed it up, its far too intriguing an idea to let lie), which brings my current WIP total to ten crossovers of various kinds for various fandoms and the like, four straight HP epic-type fics of various styles and series, one minor Buffy fic (Drusilla centric no less) and several for the other fandoms I write in, on top of which, I have a newly-rekindled love of the Scarlet Pimpernel - I stupidly bought the video, which reminded me how good the books were (I went through a stage of Pimpernel obsession in 1998 - can I say for the record that those books are bloody brilliant? No? Tough! I love Percy! I love a hero! Be afraid!) and now, I have a huge series planned for that fandom as well. And I just gave myself a thought for a new crossover series.

Dear God.

Someone should switch off my imagination!

Gyah...

I really should be working on the first 3000-word chapter of my tiny 12,000 word dissertation, which is due in in just over a month and have yet to read the plays I’m writing on properly (which is on Shakespeare and his tragic heroes, in case anyone wondered (and yes I’m babbling - get the feeling I really need internet access right about now? And a livejournal? Yeesh! I have no life...)). I don’t see me getting anywhere until I get the first chapter of the LoTR/HP baby out of the way *twitches*

The name is still undecided, but methinks a play on Tolkein’s titles may come about - all hail the man. He definitely knew what he was doing. Still not my favourite books or writer, but the guy could write, I give him that (although someone should have told him that having about 20 names beginning with ‘F’ in eight paragraphs is just a TEENY bit too much for one mortal mind to take! Plus I was reading it at about 1am, so my mind wasn’t on full-power. If it ever is...).

But, I digress, herein, we find out just what’s happening around our favourite school of Witchcraft & Wizardry and our heroes. Ben makes an appearance *innocence*. Ron arrives and brings some friends/family-types with him. Sirius is about and is VERY interested in a short, blonde Slayer-type. There’s a little bit of conflict. Just a little. Honest. Really. Things pretty much get... interesting, shall we say?

Also, this is an epic-length chapter, because I do have so much to tidy up regarding the character/loose threads etc and the scenes - when I start writing - turn out a lot longer than I intended. *pokes her muse* This thing is in working order, yupyup!

Moi? Evil? I have no idea what you mean ;)

__________________________

"Willow?"

"Mmm?"

"Are you awake?"

"Nope."

Hermione smiled, toying with her lover’s hair. "Didn’t think so," she murmured.

Morning light was flooding into the room that the two witches shared, the drapes around the bed that they now shared open, as the rays crept across the lush carpet and warmly caressed the two young women.

"We should get up."

"Nuh-uh," came Willow’s drowsy reply, snuggling comfortably against Hermione with a yawn, her head resting on the older witch’s shoulder. "Isn’t morning yet. Don’t have to get up."

"And what do you call the odd light coming in the window?"

Green eyes fluttered open and the red-haired girl looked towards the window. Her nose wrinkled. "Magic?" she suggested, raising her eyes to her lover. She shifted and leaned up on her elbow to look down at Hermione. "You gotta go to class?"

"I am the teacher, Will." Hermione raised a hand to brush errant strands of hair back from the Willow’s face. Willow had a rosy patch on her right cheek where it had been resting against Hermione’s body.

"What about giving me some private classes?" she suggested, raising her eyebrows, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes.

Hermione pursed her lips and tried in vain look frustrated, failing in a spectacular fashion. "Will..." she began, only for her girlfriend’s lips to smother the lecture that was impending.

Moving to kneel over her girlfriend, Willow moaned against Hermione’s lips as Hermione’s hands moved up her back, one tangling into her hair, the other palpating the skin lazily as she deepened the kiss.

Somewhere along the line, although neither of the couple could be sure where, their pyjamas somehow ended up on the other side of the room, which seemed to be getting a lot warmer.

The heavy gold and red blanket was pushed off the bed, the white sheet melding to the bodies of the two young women.

"I love you, Willow," Hermione breathed, brown eyes meeting green as they broke out of the kiss.

Willow’s lips curved up in a happy grin. "This has to be the best way to wake up in the morning," she replied, before nuzzling her way down Hermione’s throat. "Love you too, by the way."

"Mmm," Hermione sank back against the pillows, as there was the sound of rapping on the door.

"Hermione!"

Brown eyes popped open. "Ron?"

Willow jerked bolt upright. "Oh crap!" she squeaked.

There was another knock on the door and the brass knob started turning. Shooting a frantic look at Willow, Hermione hastily gave her very naked lover a push, sending the red head tumbling off the bed.

Unfortunately, Willow’s legs were wound in the sheet, so she fell, taking the sheet and remainder of Hermione’s modesty with her, leaving the older witch sitting in the middle of the bed, very aware of the winter chill.

And in direct line of sight of the door as Ron stepped into the room his sister and best friend shared.

He immediately stopped short.

There was a snort of laughter from behind the bed, which Hermione tried to cover with a quick cough.

Ron gaped at her.

"Er..."

Despite the situation, Hermione couldn’t do anything but laugh at the stunned look on her ex-lover’s face. Sitting up and pulling her legs up to shield herself a little, she smiled at him. "Morning, Ron."

"I...er...uh...you...naked?"

She glanced down at herself. "Oh no! You noticed!" she exclaimed, trying to pull a mortified face and failing miserably when she started laughing again. "It's not like you haven’t seen me naked before, Ron."

A soft sound of indignation came from behind the bed.

"Yeah, but we...we were...you know...seeing each other then."

"Well," she replied reasonably, trying to ignore the muffled giggles of her lover coming from behind the bed. "You are the one that barged into my bedroom without waiting for permission."

Blinking, Ron backed towards the door. "I...er...I was looking for Will...and you, so I thought I would come and see if you were nake... here! I thought I’d come and see if you were here!"

Tilting her head, Hermione gave him a smile. "Would you prefer it if we met you in the Great Hall?"

"We?"

"Willow and...oh! Willow went for a bath, I think, and we’ll be down shortly."

"Okay," Ron nodded, wetting his lips. "Um...I’ll go now...right now. See you later."

The door slammed shut and Hermione fell back against the pillows, laughing, as she heard his footsteps thundering down the stone staircase of the tower. He was actually running down the stairs!

Willow’s head popped over the edge of the bed.

"Good thing I was the one that ended up on the floor, huh?" she said, climbing back onto the bed. A sheet was wrapped around her body. She swept it over Hermione’s body, lying down beside her.

"Seeing your ex naked is bad enough first thing in the morning," Hermione agreed, one arm sliding around Willow’s shoulders. "Seeing your sister naked would be so much worse."

"And he ruined the mood," the red head sighed.

"And almost caught us."

Willow drew back a little, sitting up. "Caught?" Her voice was laced with unease and hurt. "Are...are you saying that us being...you know...out as a hand-holding pair of witchy lovers is a bad thing?"

"No! Not at all!" Hermione sat up. Framing Willow’s face in her hands, she forced the younger witch to meet her eyes. "Willow, listen to me, I love you. I just want to have a little time for just you and I. If everyone else knew now, we...it wouldn’t let us settle into what we have without people pointing and whispering."

"But they won’t..."

"They will, Willow, and you know they will. We might not be as much a rarity as we might have been any more, but we are still very...different from the wizarding ideal couple." Gathering Willow in her arms, Hermione kissed her forehead. "I don’t want this to be ruined because people have to point and stare."

Green eyes expressed understanding but Willow still looked down sadly. "I want to tell people, Hermione," she said softly. "I...I have all this happiness inside me and I can’t tell anyone!"

"Not yet," Hermione agreed, exhaling a sigh. Willow nestled against her, her head resting against Hermione’s shoulder. "But we will. And we have to have a camera to get the photographs of the reactions."

Willow smiled faintly. "Especially Ron’s."

Hermione grinned, stroking her hair. "If it outdoes the look on his face this morning, I’ll be very impressed."

"Well, you prepare to be impressed by my brother’s face, Granger!" Lifting her own face to her lover, Willow’s smile broadened. "He’s gonna be totally shocked! I bet he’ll swear in front of mom and then..."

As one, they exclaimed:

"Mouthwash!"

***

"Get off me!"

The fragile-looking raven-haired woman made a strange mewling noise in her throat, jutting out her lower lip like a chastised child. Or at least it would have been child-like, if she hadn’t been sprawled over his body, as naked as he was.

Ben groaned.

For the millionth time, he hated Glory.

He hated being her vessel. He hated the fact that she could use his body as her own private transport. He hated feeling like a host with a Hell-Goddess as a parasite lodged within his body, knowing she might take over at any moment.

Almost his entire life had been devoted to concealing the fact that his body was the home of Glorificus. He was her mask. When things got too hard for her to deal with, she would conceal herself within his body.

It had led to numerous arrests and incidents, in various places the world over. He had lost track of the number of times he had woken in a strange place with strange people and no recollection of how he had come to be there.

Like now.

Taking in his surroundings warily, he quickly realised that he was in a large, four-poster double bed with very expensive linens. The wood of the bedposts and the walls of the room around the bed were some kind of dark wood.

The semi-transparent curtains of the room were deep forest green and the light - was it morning sunlight? - filtering through them made the whole room look like it was submerged underwater.

A few candles were positioned here and there around the bare, dark walls of the room, which could have fitted at least four more double beds in it, the warm flickers damp and chilled by the coldness of the washed out light through the drapes.

Okay.

Some expensive hotel probably, but why was he in bed with a girl?

Glory had never shown any interest in females before, although there had been the random male from time to time, so why was this strange woman all over him like he was going out of fashion?

And how long had it been since she had taken control?

The last thing he could remember, he was in Sunnydale, California, but the wintery chill in the air told him that he definitely wasn’t in the sunshine state any longer.

Rolling towards the side of the bed, he swung his legs out from under the crisp white sheets and heavy blankets - green again - the wooden floor cold against the bare soles of his feet.

Pushing the sheets and blankets aside, he looked around.

"Hey," he said, turning to the dark-haired woman, who was kneeling beside him, swaying from side-to-side. "Yeah, you, did she leave any clothes for me this time, or do I have to stay naked?"

He had never managed to decide if the humiliation of wearing Glory’s personal choice of clothing was worse than going stark naked.

The woman’s scarlet lips, the only part of her body with any colour, spread in a smile that was about as friendly as a man-eating tiger’s.

"The shining one thinks that you must let your little snake wiggle free," she purred, tracing patterns in the air with her fingertips. "Swing from side-to-side, then oh!" Jumping up on her knees, she clapped her hands together. "Jump to attention!"

Ben looked at the wall, very tempted to walk over and smack his head against it.

Not only was he in a strange room, he was in a strange room with a very strange naked lunatic.

As if things could get any worse.

"Meaning?" he asked, wondering how he could have believed he had the patience to consider a career in the medical profession. The woman shook her head, still smiling at him. Crooking a finger in front of her face, she beckoned him. "What?"

"One mustn’t speak such naughty things out loud," she confided in a stage-whisper, her eerie, blue-grey eyes wide. "God and his angels are always snooping into such matters and it is unseemly for a lady!"

Sighing, he crossed to the bedside, stopping face-to-face with her. "So what did you mean, then?" he asked again.

The wordless answer came in the form of a very cold hand on a very sensitive spot of his anatomy. He tried to jerk back, but her other hand locked against the back of his neck and she hissed in his ear.

"We are to play, the shining one said. Such fun and games! I can’t eat you all up, like the big bad wolf, but mummy says that the little Princess can play with your little snake and make it behave until she has to go back to school and teach them all manner of delicious lessons."

As she spoke, her body seemed to take on a mind of it’s own, writhing against his in an all too provocative fashion, her voice lilting and haunted.

Her face drew back from his throat.

Ben stared at her. "You...you mean Glory brought you here for me to screw?"

The woman stared back, licking her canines. "Brought? No, no, silly boy. I came to the shining one and saw you hiding inside so cuddly and warm." Thin fingers rose and brushed the brown curls back from his tanned forehead. "You would be so sweet and young, my pretty little one," she panted.

Breaking free of her grip, Ben backed across the room. "Look, lady, I don’t know what Glory told you, but I-I’m not interested in getting laid..."

"Your little snake wants to play hide and seek in the tunnels," the woman answered in a dreamy whisper. her half-closed eyes drifted down his body and she smirked. "It is standing on its own two feet. You lie, you naughty boy."

Grabbing one of the dresses strewn over the chairs, Ben felt the blood rising in his face as he shielded his groin. "Get outta here," he snapped, hastily tying the skimpy dress around his waist.

"You have made a little tent," the woman noted with clear amusement, rolling onto her back, her head rocking back over the edge of the mattress, her dark hair hanging down towards the floor.

Ben scowled, stalking over towards the window. "Shut the hell up."

"Such a naughty mouth, little boy," she called after him and he heard the rustling of fabric moving beneath her. A startled cry escaped him when slender arms slid around his waist, her skin ice-cold against his. "Mummy might have to smack your bottom."

"I’m not interested," Ben pushed her arms away, raising his hands to jerk wide the green curtains, daylight flooding into the room.

A screech of anguish from the woman behind him was drowned out by a crackling sound, almost like something burning and he turned. She was cowering on the other side of the room, in the shadows, her bone-thin hands covering her face.

"What? You don’t like sunlight?"

Her hands were lowered from her face and Ben slammed back against the glass of the massive windows, almost shattering the pane with the impact.

"No, you silly boy," she hissed through elongated fangs, her eyes burning a sulphuric gold in the dark shadows on the far side of the room. "The shining one said you were young and pretty, but she did not say you were an empty-headed fool!"

"You...you’re a vampire!"

"Vampire I am and may be still!" Curving her arms out behind her, she craned her long neck forwards, rolling her head. "The shining one promised me a toy to play with, little fool! I would munch you like a cupcake, had she not given orders that you were only a toy!"

"A toy? Glory thinks I’m some kinda object she can hand out to her favourite..." Ben gestured at her angrily. "Her pets?"

The vampire grinned greedily at him. "Yeah," she replied, shaking her head, sending dark waves of hair cascading around her frighteningly thin shoulders. "And you’re all locked up in a cage like a little mouse."

"Locked...up?"

"Yeah...the shining one made her pet promise to keep you safe and tight here...and she said her little Princess," she made a little curtsey that was shockingly lewd, "is allowed to play with the one who bears her."

Ben shot a look over his shoulder. It was barely past sun rise, which gave him all day. "Sorry," he said. "Not interested, so you can just go."

"You think the licks of the fiery ball can keep me away from you, my precious?" she cooed, shaking her head at him as if he were the stupidest creature in the world. "I’m sorry, my pet, but the fiery ball will sleep soon and you can not hope to fight."

"I could stake you," he threatened idly, knowing that she was probably far faster than he was, despite the fact she was almost skeletally thin. Her golden eyes seemed two times too large for her elfin face and she was staring at him intensely.

"You could try, kitten, and I could break you up like a little bundle of twigs," She clapped her hands rhythmically. "Snap! Snap! Snap! I’m not allowed to drink you all up, but the shining one says I am permitted to break you if you are bad." A dreamy look crossed her face and she drew the back of her left hand down her left cheek. "I haven’t broken anyone for such a long time."

Leaning against the glass, Ben looked out at the grounds of whatever building he was in and exhaled a sigh of defeat. "I don’t have any choice in this, do I?" he said, turning back to face her.

The vampire smiled at him and he shuddered at the sight of her fangs. "Not if you want to keep your little spitting snake where it is," she advised sagely. That thought made him shudder more than the fangs had.

"Okay," he pulled the curtain closed. "Get it over with."

***

"Ron!"

"Willow!" Ron managed to get to his feet from the Gryffindor table, where he was sitting in time to catch his sister in a hug, which knocked him back a step. Landing firmly on his rear, he looked down at the grinning girl in his arms. "You’re in a good mood today."

Willow swatted at him playfully. "It's not every day that my favourite big brother comes to visit!"

"Favourite?" a rather indignant voice spoke from behind Ron.

Squirming out of Ron’s arms, Willow stared over his shoulder. "Omigod! Percy!"

"Yes," Percy sniffed. "And Bill and Charlie are somewhere hereabouts as well, so I don’t see why Ron should be getting all your attention, when...Willow!"

Her arms locked around her brother’s neck, after scrambling around Ron’s legs and reaching her third eldest brother, Willow slapped a wet kiss on his cheek. "Oh, don’t be so cranky, Percy! What dragged you away from work?"

"Away from work?" Percy spluttered indignantly.

"He’s here on business and he brought me along," a familiar female voice spoke from between her two brothers and Willow turned. Amy Madison grinned up at her long-time friend. "Hey, Willow."

"Omigod!"

"You were meant to owl her and tell her that you were all coming down, Ron, you daft pillock," Willow looked up happily at Bill’s voice, as she squeezed in between Percy - who looked very affronted - and Amy.

"I wanted to surprise her," Ron replied in an injured tone.

"Like Hermione...er...Professor Granger surprised you?"

Ron went red to the tips of his ears and started mumbling over the plate of bacon and eggs in front of him. Bill raised his eyebrows, but said nothing, sitting down opposite his sister and Amy, Charlie by his side.

The Gryffindor fifth years had an extremely early Herbology lesson on the edge of the Forbidden Forest so a large portion of the table had already been emptied, making all the more room for the newest arrivals.

"Where have you been, Amy? I mean, it's been forever!"

Amy laughed. "It's not been that long," Willow gave her a look. "Okay, maybe it has been a while, but your big brother has been looking after me, haven’t you, Percy?" On Willow’s other side, Percy made an odd squeaking sound in his throat.

"Percy? Okay, how? What? And how?"

Bill cut in, pointing a gold fork in Amy’s direction. "We took her to the Ministry of Magic to see if there was any way to have her trained, Will," he explained. "But they were worried about the amount of dark magic her mother had passed on to her, so they gave her a year of probation with a trusted Ministry wizard to test if she would be dangerous to herself or anyone else."

"And Percy has been looking after me ever since," Amy finished happily. "I’ve been staying in The Leaky Cauldron with him." She leaned closer to Willow and added in a conspiratorial whisper. "Your brothers are so sweet!"

Willow laughed. "I know, Amy, believe me." Turning to Percy, she nudged him in the ribs. "So, Percy, has Amy been a good girl?"

"Pardon? Oh! Yes! Very satisfactory progress! Developing very well! Have never enjoyed a project quite as much!"

"Are we talking about Amy or cauldron bottoms, Perce?" Bill teased. "After all, you went all doe-eyed, so my bet would be on cauldron bottoms, unless you have a new fantasy about Miss Madison."

The roar of laughter from the rest of the group drew stares from around the hall, but Willow was the only one that seemed to notice Percy’s ears going the same shade of red as Ron’s had moments earlier.

"I think I will be going to find Professor McGonagall," he snapped crisply, getting to his feet and stomping away up the Great Hall. His three brothers continued to laugh in his wake.

"He’s been kinda cranky like that since we got back to the Burrow yesterday," Amy said, frowning. "I thought he’d be glad that I went to bug Ron instead of hanging around him all the time."

"You don’t bug me, Amy," Ron said amiably, wrapping one arm around her and pulling her against his side in an affectionate hug, while chasing an errant piece of sausage around the plate with the fork in his other hand.

Amy went scarlet and grinned broadly at him.

Willow mentally groaned, wondering if there was possibly a way that things could get any worse.

Of course, it could.

Buffy and Dawn Summers entered the Great Hall with Harry and Ginny Potter.

"Buffy!" Ron leapt to his feet so fast that poor Amy was pitched backwards off the bench. She shrieked and grabbed Willow, both of them landing in a heap on the floor, while Bill and Charlie fell against each other laughing.

"Hey...Ron, right?"

Ron nodded eagerly, holding a hand out across the table again. "It's nice to see you again, Bu...er...Miss Summers! Are you enjoying being a Professor? I mean, not that you wouldn’t, since you’re still here, but I suppose you might not..."

"Ahem?"

"Oh, hello again, Dawn," Ron’s attention immediately jerked back to Buffy, who was laughing behind her hand, her eyes dancing. "So...what... um...what do you have planned for...er...breakfast?"

"I did kinda plan to maybe eat something of the foody variety," she replied, trying to smother a smile unsuccessfully.

Ron looked down at the spaces on Bill and Charlie’s side of the table, then at his own side of the table, where Willow and Amy were picking themselves up and sitting down again. "Er...would you...you know..."

"Like to sit with you?"

"I’m very sorry, Junior Ginger-nut," a lazy male voice drawled from a short distance behind the Slayer and the Potters, who exchanged glances and shook their heads. "But the Professor is sitting with me this morning."

"Is she really?" Buffy inquired, crossing her arms stubbornly and turning to face Sirius Black, who gave her a very wolfish grin, blue eyes glinting. He cocked his head in a very dog-like fashion, pulling his hands up in front of his chest and assuming his pleading puppy look. "All right, already! I hate it when you do that!"

Offering her an arm, Sirius flashed a triumphant grin at Ron, who glared at him. The Slayer seemed oblivious to the looks passed between the two men and cheerfully took Sirius’ arm, Dawn grabbing the other.

Dropping back down on his seat, ignoring Amy’s words of comfort, Ron scowled darkly after them and Willow wondered if perhaps it would be a better idea to go back to her room and hide in her bed all day until Hermione came back from class.

At least, she mused, there wouldn’t be anyone else bold - or stupid - enough to join in the battle for Buffy’s affections, with a former murder-suspect turned prisoner of Azkaban and the famous Ron Weasley.

***

"Excuse me?"

Standing upright on a muggle-clothed man’s shoulders, stretching upwards towards the candle hangings, Professor McGonagall looked down at the young man standing at the door. "Percy Weasley!" she exclaimed in relief.

The former Head Boy stared at the Deputy Head Mistress of Hogwarts, as she kicked the head of the blonde man beneath her and leapt down from his shoulders, caught a moment from landing by him.

"Perhaps you could be of some assistance to me, Mr Weasley," she said, puffing a little. Her face was flushed and several strands of dark hair had come loose from her orderly bun, which was almost as terrifying as seeing her standing on some random man‘s shoulders.

"A-assistance?"

"Another brain-dead prat, eh, Minnie?" the blond grinned at her and she sorely looked like she wanted to hit him. "Yeah, the lady needs a bit of a hand, since her wand kind of...er...‘accidentally’," he made airquotes with his fingers, "ended up stuck in the candelabra."

"You threw it up there, you blonde nit!"

Percy Weasley clearly wasn’t used to this behaviour from his former - and he had believed her to be wise and sensible - House Mistress, a panicked look crossing his face as he started backing rapidly towards the door.

"Weasley! Stop backing away! I need you to get my wand back!"

"Run, you pillock, before she slide-tackles you and nicks your wand!"

Somehow, the blond man’s advice made a great deal of sense, considering the fact that Professor McGonagall was prowling towards him like a big cat, looking far too dangerous. Turning on tail, Percy fled from the room.

***

He wanted to kill Black.

Pausing, he considered that thought.

He had always wanted to kill Black, ever since they were at school and for plenty of very good reasons. Although, up until today, he had never felt the urge to poison the bloody man quite as fiercely.

And he wasn’t quite sure he liked his motivation.

In fact, he knew he would happily poison the motivation as well.

Strange, he noted to himself, that his motivation was the single most annoying blonde-haired, muggle-born, wannabe-Professor, American hussy that he had ever had the misfortune to clap his eyes on.

What he couldn’t explain was why he was so deeply and irrationally irritated to see Sirius Black talking and laughing with Summers.

And Summers Junior.

Summers Junior, though, was flashing desperate looks at him. It seemed like she was begging him to save her from Black’s dire attempts and courtly behaviour and what he termed as his ‘sense of humour’.

It had never been successfully defined.

Some had said that man would sooner tap-dance on the sun than understand Sirius Black’s so-called sense of humour.

Sitting at the High table, he looked down at his plate, glaring at the gleaming dish and the reflections in it. He could see that Dumbledore was watching him with that odd little knowing smile on his lips and, more than anything, he wanted to hurl the plate at the Head Master.

That would be immature, though.

Under the table, he directed his wand at Black’s plate and sent it hurtling towards Dumbledore, who - faster than a man his age should have been able to - whipped out his wand and redirected the plate at Black.

Both Black and Summers yelled in protest and surprise, while the Weasleys burst out laughing nearby, along with half the school.

Snape leaned back in his chair, a satisfied smirk reaching his lips, his wand safely concealed back inside his capricious sleeves.

The smug satisfaction faded the instant he looked at Dumbledore.

The Head Master shook his head in mock-gravity, a broad smile on his lips, his blue eyes twinkling.

With a growl of frustration, Snape stormed to his feet and swept out of the Great hall in as impressive a fashion as Percy Weasley had just over fifteen minutes before, his robes flaring around him.

***

"She’s gone mad!"

Hermione yelped in surprise when Percy Weasley practically tackled her on the way down the staircase to the Great Hall, grabbing her by her upper arms and giving her a wild shake. "Percy!"

"She was on his shoulders! She was standing on his shoulders! And she called him a blond nit!" he exclaimed pitifully. "The Deputy Head Mistress of the school! I can’t believe how much the standard of the school has fallen!"

"You saw Spike and McGonagall?"

"Spike?"

"The blond vampire?" Percy’s dark brown eyes formed large and perfect circles, which matched the stunned ‘o’ of his mouth and he blinked owlishly at her. "And I suppose that you didn’t know he was a vampire, did you?"

"I came because Amy asked if she could come and visit Willow," Percy mumbled to himself. "Certainly didn’t expect to run into a vampire, especially with his head up Professor McGonagall’s robes..."

Hermione smothered a giggle, wondering if it would be incredibly mean to mention that the vampire and the teacher had been known to play strip poker and gamble over games of snap in the staff room.

"Miss Granger! Mr Weasley!"

"It’s her!" Percy yelled wildly. He was off again, running, as Professor McGonagall appeared in the Hall, leaving Hermione laughing helplessly, leaning against the stone balustrade beside her.

McGonagall watched him go, looking a little perplexed. "Very excitable little fellow, isn’t he? To think he is included in the mad group, who are meant to be the ones who saved the world. Shocking, absolutely shocking." she remarked, then turned her attention to Hermione. "Granger, do you happen to have your wand?"

"Of course I do."

McGonagall sighed with relief. "Then perhaps you would be kind enough to help me to retrieve my own wand. Billy believed it would be highly amusing to throw it out of my reach and the nitwit managed to get it trapped in the candelabra."

"You realise that your antics with Spike have terrified poor Percy, don’t you?"

Professor McGonagall’s expression was serious, but there was a naughty twinkle in her eyes. "I have no idea what you’re talking about, Miss Granger," she said with a long-suffering sigh.

"I’m sure," Hermione retorted, grinning.

***

"But it’s breakfast time!"

Dawn gave Duncan a reproving look. "Stop complaining. If you had come to the Great Hall when I told you to, you wouldn’t have missed breakfast," she hissed at him, jerking him sideways as a group of Hufflepuffs went hurrying past them.

They were hidden under Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak and were on the way to their so-called ‘hang-out’, the girls’ toilets on the second floor. Duncan was sure they were just using the cloak, because Dawn thought it was cool.

"Can’t we do this after our first class?" Duncan asked again, his stomach growling loudly. "Or maybe after I have some breakfast?"

"I have to check on my potion!"

There was a silence, as they hurried down the hall towards the toilets.

Finally, Duncan gave in to curiosity. "What are ye working on?"

"Polyjuice."

"POLYJUICE!?!"

A hand was slapped firmly across his mouth.

"Not so loud, dork-brain! I don’t want the whole school to know about it!" Dawn whispered in annoyance, glaring at him. "If Harry, Ron and Hermione can make it, I can make it!"

"But ye’re not allowed to!"

"Which is why we’re doing it secretly, doofus," Dawn said impatiently. "C’mon!"

Duncan made an incoherent sound of concern.

"You’re scared of getting caught, aren’t you?"

"Me?"

"That was a very manly squeak."

Duncan shot a glare at her. "Has anyone ever told ye that yer the most annoying girl in the world?"

"Every day," Dawn replied airily, grinning. "C’mon! I wanna check the potion, then we can go back and see everyone! Harry and Ginny have actually come out of the medical wing and Ron is visiting again!"

"Ron? Ron Weasley?"

"Duh!" Dawn exclaimed. "Who else? It's kinda like a reunion of all the heroes from the books! Harry Potter, Sirius Black and all the Weasleys! Someone said that Fred and George would be arriving this afternoon!"

"The Weasleys that run Zonko’s?"

"You got it."

A look of hero-worship crossed Duncan’s face. "All right, we have ta get back tae the Great Hall as soon as possible! Can ye introduce me tae them? I’ve always wanted tae meet them!"

Dawn grinned. "Only if you shut up and come with me to check my potion."

***

"Afternoon, Willow."

Sitting in a large, comfortably squashy chair, Willow looked up at her lover, a weary smile coming to her lips. "Hey, sweetie."

They were in the large living room that had been provided for all the guests. Various doors lead off into the dozen guest rooms, but most of the group were currently sitting around the room, chatting and laughing.

Suspiciously, Dawn Summers and Duncan Cameron appeared to be in some kind of secret conclave with the Weasley twins, who had arrived late, during the evening meal with a fantastic display of their latest tricks.

Needless to say, the twins had immediately sold out of these rare goodies.

Dawn and Duncan looked like they were having the time of their life.

"Why so tired?"

Leaning forward in the seat, Willow nodded over to the opposite side of the room, where Percy was sitting in the cushioned window seat with a book in his hands. Why he was pretending to read a Sesame Street book, Hermione didn’t know.

"He has been behaving rather...strangely today."

"He has someone on his mind," Willow muttered, jerking her head subtly in the direction of the table, where Buffy, Ron, Amy, Xander, Sirius, Harry and Ginny were sitting and discussing the threat of Glory.

Ron looked like he was very interested in something the Slayer was saying.

Hermione looked from the table to Percy, then saw just who the most rigid of the Weasleys was staring longingly at. "He fancies Amy?" she whispered in shock.

"I think so," Willow said, exhaling a breath. "Which definitely isn’t of the good."

"How do you work that out?"

"Look who Amy is interested in."

Sure enough, Amy was sitting so close to Ron that she was practically curled up in his lap, touching, prodding and swatting him at any chance she got, which Ron didn’t seem to mind, but then, he was a little distracted.

By a small blonde woman.

Who was currently chatting amiably to a striking black-haired man with dazzling blue eyes.

"Ohhhh..."

"I’ll say," Willow muttered, leaning back in her seat. "And Buffy likes Sirius, but I don’t think she like-likes him. I dunno why, cos he’s all hot and sexy," Hermione raised her eyebrows. "But not as hot or sexy as you," Willow corrected with an impish grin. "And you look better in a dress."

"I would hope so!" Hermione huffed, then glanced at the table again. "What about Ron? Does she know Ron has a crush on her?"

"Buffy wouldn’t know if someone liked her, unless they walked up to her, smooched her and said ‘I like you like you’."

"So Ron’s everso subtle mumbling approach won’t go down too well?"

"Mmm."

"And Amy..."

"She’s liked Ron since they first met," Willow replied. "She likes kinda goofy, but not too goofy guys, so Ron is perfect in her opinion. Plus, hey! He’s my big brother and it’s always good to date a friend’s big brother, because they can’t do anything too bad to you, unless they want you to get revenge."

"Poor old Percy..."

"Shouldn’t we feel sorry for Ron?"

Hermione shook her head adamantly. "He can get any girl he wants, if he just puts his mind to it. I mean, look at him! He’s tall, good-looking, he has a brilliant sense of humour and he can be your best friend. He always chooses the impossible, though. He has missed so many chances just because he was always looking at the better-looking person in the distance. Has done ever since he met Fleur."

"Bill’s wife?"

Hermione nodded. "Ron fancied her for months."

"So him and Amy...?"

"We stop at all costs."

Willow grinned, shifting in the seat so Hermione could perch comfortable on the deep red velvet of the arm. "So what do you have planned, oh wicked witch? Do you want to help out my hopeless big brother?"

"Percy hasn’t had any luck with women, mainly because he has been so focussed on his work," Hermione said thoughtfully. "Now, he is interested and that’s because the woman started out as work."

"And that woman is interested in the goofy younger brother."

"Willow, we’re witches," her lover reminded her. "If we want Ron out of the picture and we want to push a certain pair together, I am sure that we could achieve it without too much difficulty."

"You don’t think Ron would mind that we took a potential girl friend away?" asked Willow, worrying her lower lip.

Hermione glanced across the room at Amy and Ron. Ron had an arm around her, but he was still talking to the Slayer. "I think he sees Amy more as another little sister, because she came into his life at almost the same time as you. I don’t think he could see her as anything else. And now...Buffy and Sirius..."

"NO!"

"Why not?"

Willow gave her lover a look. "Because," she replied simply. "Buffy would kill both of us in a very slow and painful way."

"Ah."

"Yeah."