Assassins and Lovers

Albus Dumbledore had waited long enough. He had given Granger plenty of time to kill some targets, but so far, she'd been so cautious that she'd only managed to take out Grubbly-Plank. Sprout should have been easy enough, he thought. I suppose I can't blame her for not wanting to make any mistakes. Granger would be out soon, anyway.

He made himself invisible and waited outside the Great Hall. No matter how careful Hermione was, she hadn't skipped a meal yet, and he didn't think she would start now. He couldn't help grinning a little as all the students walked right past him. Being a powerful wizard could be fun sometimes. . .

And there she was, walking with Sirius Black. . . Albus's grin twisted into a colossal smirk. Their chemistry was apparent from fifty feet away--the hands swinging by their sides, never quite touching, the frequent glances at each other... I hope they have the courage to be honest with one another, he thought, his smirk fading into a lonely stare.

The pair approached. As they went through the door, Albus slipped behind them and pulled Hermione out from behind, silencing her before she had a chance to make a noise. He had already slipped around the corner and disposed of the body by the time Sirius noticed she was gone.

-----

Minerva managed to squeeze out a warm smile as Albus sat down next to her at the dinner table. "Good evening."

"Guten Abend, Minerva. If I'm not mistaken, Hermione Granger should be walking through the door in, oh, about three minutes."

"You killed her already? I hope you didn't hurt her too badly."

"Of course not, it was a very clean death. And how did your appointment with Madam Hooch go?"

"Successful. I killed her six times. It wasn't quite so clean, though," she added, "I'm a trifle bruised."

"You must be exhausted." Albus looked concerned, "You'll have to let me take care of those bruises. Are you sure you didn't break anything? What exactly happened?"

"I'm all right. Who knew Hooch was so good at kung fu?"

"I didn't. I don't know why some of the students think I know everything."

"Not just the students, Albus. We all kind of assume everyone will be okay if you're around. We all depend on you," she said. "But sometimes I wonder how difficult it must be to be you. You're in charge; you're powerful. We all feel safe with you. But do you have anyone who makes you feel safe?"

Albus took a swallow of his pumpkin juice. "I have you," he said simply.

Minerva was glad that he continued looking at his plate. "Ah, yes, there's Hermione. Your timing was almost exact," she said, glancing at the clock.

"And look at Sirius. Ah! He's standing up to meet her. So attentive. What did I tell you?" He smiled triumphantly.

"Your insight serves you well, Albus." It must be obvious to Albus how I feel about him, she thought, finishing her soup. "Who's your next target?"

"Professor Sprout," he whispered in her ear.

"Not bad."

"I'm concerned about your injuries."

"Don't worry, I'll go to the Hospital Wing after I finish eating."

"If we still had Poppy, that would be fine. But I don't trust Nelda with this."

"You trusted her with Rishi Patil's broken leg last week."

"Well, this is different."

"This is really nothing." That wasn't quite true. Her left collarbone throbbed whenever she moved her arm. It had taken a little effort to drag herself to dinner, but she refused to show any weakness.

"I'd rather handle it myself."

"All right," she answered, a little relieved. "After dinner."

-----

"What happened, Hermione?" Sirius said, meeting her in the middle of the Great Hall.

"Assassinated," she shook her head. "I guess I couldn't live forever."

"Bloody hell. I wanted you to win. Who got you?"

"I couldn't see my assassin. But when I came to, I had a lemon drop in my mouth."

They looked at each other. "Dumbledore," they both said, their suspicions confirmed by the look of triumph on Dumbledore's face.

"Well, you were beaten by the best, and there's no shame in that. Here, I saved you a seat."

Hermione stuffed down a couple of fluffy rolls. "I suppose there'll be no more closet-sitting for me."

"I'm disappointed."

"I rather enjoyed sitting in the dark, myself. You know," she said excitedly, "I have the distinct urge to go muggling tonight. Are you busy?"

Only five hundred tests to grade. . . Ah, no one will mind if I give them all top marks. "Oh, no. What exactly did you have in mind?"

"Meet me outside the main entrance right after dinner. We'll walk to Hogsmeade and then Apparate to London."

-----

Rachel had been stalking Fleur all week, but somehow or other the wench always managed to escape every time she was about to make an assassination attempt. Just this afternoon, she'd had Fleur cornered in the corridor--and then Snape had arrived. He hadn't spoken a word to either of them, but he'd followed them until they reached the Great Hall and then silently planted himself on Fleur's right side. Rachel had been subjected to Snape's sullen silence and Fleur's annoying chattiness through the entire meal. And where was Bill Weasley? She tried to stop herself from going through all the worst-case scenarios. Was he on a date with someone? Or worse, lying somewhere injured?

"So, Rachel, do not you zink zat Bill Weasley is a good kisser?"

Oh, shut up. "I really wouldn't know."

"Oh, come on, Rachel. Zere is no need to lie to me. I know zat you have kissed him. Did not you find his lips very soft?"

"No, really, Fleur. We're not all lip whores."

Fleur giggled. "You are very funny, Rachel. But really, I was so sure zat you two liked each ozzer."

Snape suddenly spoke for the first time. "Please, ma chère, drop the accent before I strangle you."

"Who? Me?" Fleur looked around.

"Stop pretending to be dumb. Do you see any other French twits sitting at this table?" he hissed.

"Fine, fine. You are very mean," she proclaimed, in perfectly pronounced English. "But Rachel, would you like for me to set you up with him? I am sure that he likes you."

"I always thought he preferred blondes." Rachel wished Fleur would change the subject.

"He isn't the sort that cares."

Now, really, Fleur wasn't that bad. . . "Really, thanks for the offer, but I'm not interested right now."

"All right, Rach, but if you want my help later, you know where I live." When did Fleur start calling her Rach? "Now, really, your classroom is the best-looking classroom at this school. I thought it was very beautiful."

"What do you want?"

"Nothing. I just thought we might be friends. I really don't have very many of them."

Rachel found herself slightly regretting her coldness. Of course, she really should stop going on about what a good kisser Bill Weasley was. No sense in rubbing in something that she could never know personally. She chewed on a piece of baked chicken.

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful," Fleur added.

Rachel nearly choked on her chicken as she burst into a fit of laughter. When she looked up, her smile grew larger. Bill Weasley had walked in. No date, no injury. All was safe. "Don't say anything to Bill," she whispered to Fleur. "About that, you know."

"Of course not," Fleur winked. "Nevair." Snape glared at her.

Bill walked up to their table and sat in the empty chair beside Rachel. "William Wallace Weasley. Where have you been?"

He grinned self-consciously. "I. . . got lost?"

"Oh, really. Mr. Bill Weasley, former Head Boy of Hogwarts, got lost?"

"And how many times have you gotten lost in the last week?"

"Four. But I didn't spend seven years of my life here."

"Hey, even Dumbledore doesn't know where everything is here. Just tonight I discovered a new tower. You really should see it--it's hidden between Ravenclaw Tower and Gryffindor Tower."

"Yes, I'd like to see more of this old castle."

"I'll take you up tonight after dinner, okay?"

Rachel ignored the smirk on Fleur's face.

-----

Snape followed Trelawney back to her chamber after dinner. His nerves were rather shot after sitting next to that Delacour woman all through dinner. . . But tonight was the night to act. Trelawney, sitting on his right, had actually invited him to come see her new crystal ball. It did not get any easier than this.

"Hurry up," he said. "I've got work to do."

Her gray robes swished a little faster. "Alright," she said, "Severus. I'm in a hurry to be alone with you, too."

He rolled his eyes. Only one more flight of stairs and he'd be rid of this woman.

She pranced down the corridor to the door of her chamber. "Come on in. . . Severus."

He scowled and walked in. As soon as she shut the door, he pulled out his wand.

"You are going to assassinate me. I had foreseen that this would happen."

"Oh, shut up."

On the whole, he reflected later, it wasn't too bad. It was, of course, unfortunate that she wasn't really dead.