A Matter of Circumstance

Chapter 6 - Out of The Burrow

Harry lurched out of the fireplace into his kitchen. Turning around, he retrieved Ginny's trunk and placed it in the lounge doorway. As he brushed the soot from his clothes, he glanced toward the back door. He expected Ginny to be Apparating into his back garden at any moment. In a cowardly attempt to escape any last minute lecture, he had offered to take Ginny's luggage to his house by Floo. As he had departed, the last thing he had seen was a tearful Mrs. Weasley fussing over her last baby leaving home.

Harry's musings were interrupted by an admonishing hoot from Hedwig. "Sorry, Hedwig..." He strolled to her perch and reached out to caress her soft feathers. "I didn't forget you. I was just lost in thought." He followed Hedwig's gaze to Ginny's trunk. "Well, girl... we're going to have company. Ginny's going to be staying here for a while. She should be here soon." He looked out the window just in time to see Ginny appear at the far end of the garden.

As he strode towards the back door to let Ginny in, he noticed a package on his kitchen table. He experienced a jolt of panic when he saw the label with Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions in curly, fuchsia print. "Hedwig," he called while holding out the neatly wrapped bundle, "could you take this up to my room and leave it on my bureau? Quickly, before Ginny sees!" Hedwig hooted and swooped down, grasping the package in her claws. Out of the corner of his eye, Harry saw her flying through the doorway into the lounge just as he opened the back door.

Stepping outside, Harry grinned as he watched a frowning Ginny stride toward him carrying a bag that was overflowing with what looked like food items.

"I don't know what you think is so funny, Potter," Ginny grumbled. "Mum obviously thinks you are incapable of feeding me."

Harry chuckled and quickly relieved Ginny of her burden and motioned her toward the open door. "Well, I'm surprised she didn't insist on moving with you," he replied as he followed her inside. He placed the bag onto the counter and turned to face her.

Ginny snorted and broke into a smile. "Thank God for small favors! Honestly... I didn't think I'd ever get away from there." She narrowed her eyes in mock irritation. "And thanks a lot for sticking around."

"Hey, I know enough to retreat from a losing battle," he said, raising his hands in surrender.

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Humph..."

Shaking his head and smiling, Harry turned to the counter, removed the top item from the bag and walked to the pantry to put it away. Ginny began unloading the rest of the food and laid it on the counter. In silence, they continued to put everything away. As Harry placed the last plate of biscuits on the shelf, he began frantically searching his mind for something to say. Looking about the room for inspiration, his eyes fell upon Ginny's trunk. "Er... how about I show you to your room."

Harry levitated the trunk and led Ginny through a tour of his house ending it upstairs outside the bedroom adjoining his own. Opening the door, he allowed Ginny to enter first. He followed her in and levitated her trunk to the foot of the bed where he set it down. Standing just inside the doorway, he watched as Ginny wandered about the room. As she passed the vanity, her fingers trailed along the polished surface, stopping to touch the lace edge of the table scarf. She then walked to the window and carefully shifted the draperies to one side to peer out.

"It's a lovely room, Harry," she commented as she let the window covering fall back into place. She then turned and walked toward the bed. He observed as her hand caressed the fabric of the bed hangings. She stepped over to the vase of flowers sitting on the bedside table and leaned down to smell them. He stood mesmerized. It gave him a strange feeling in his stomach to just watch her. It wasn't as if he'd ever avoided looking at Ginny; he'd just never really paid close attention before. He thought he should be ashamed for just staring, but for some reason it didn't feel real.

Ginny gently fingered the petals. "The flowers are a nice touch. Are they a normal part of the decor, or did you add them on purpose?"

"I put them in yesterday." Harry felt a slight heat rise in his neck and he slid his hands into his trouser pockets. "I thought they'd make the room more fitting... for a woman."

Ginny looked at him with a slight smile. "That was thoughtful." She dropped her gaze and shifted her stance. "You know, Harry... someday you are going to make some woman a wonderful husband."

Her comment shook him from his reverie. He didn't understand why, but he found her words somehow disturbing. Some woman? Why did that sound so wrong? "Er... thanks."

"I'm sorry..." she murmured, "I didn't mean to embarrass you.".

"It's okay," Harry grinned at her lopsidedly. "Right... Well, about this room--" He wasn't sure how to bring the subject up; they hadn't really discussed their living arrangements in relation to their obligations under the spell. "I want you to have someplace private... I mean, I think we should only use my room--"

"Didn't we already decide that we shouldn't be embarrassed to talk about this?" she prompted.

Harry sighed. "You're right. Well, anyway... I think we should only... have sex in my room. Like I said, I want you to have some place private. A sanctuary, if you will."

"But what about you?" Ginny asked. "Don't you deserve to have some place private as well?"

"It's not the same for me," he replied. "I've lived here for nearly three years. It's become a haven to me but I'd imagine that, given the circumstances, you might not feel comfortable here. That's why I want you to have a space that's entirely your own. One that isn't...attached to the spell." Harry shrugged. "I just want you to feel comfortable here. I want you to make yourself at home."

He watched as color rose into her cheeks. "That's so sweet, Harry. Thank you."

Harry nodded. "Well... the wardrobe is empty, and your private loo is through there," he said, taking his hands from his pockets and pointing to one of the closed doors. "I'll let you get settled." Harry attempted to repress any embarrassment as he added, "I've a couple of letters to write, so I'll be in my room... through there--" he pointed at the second closed door "--when you're ready to... you know...."

Ginny's eyes widened and she nodded a bit stiffly. "Oh... right. I'll be along shortly."

Harry quickly left her room, closing the door behind him. He heaved a sigh and walked to his room.

An hour later, Harry was sitting at his dresser when he heard a faint knock on the door adjoining the two bedrooms. Putting down his quill, he took a deep, calming breath. "Come in," he called.

The door opened a bit and Ginny's head peeked around the corner. Seeing Harry, she opened the door wider and stepped into the room. Timidly she said, "I suppose we'd better go ahead and--"

Harry cleared his throat. "Right," he said quickly. He stood up and walked to the door leading to the hallway, placing his hand on the lever. "I'll just wait out here until you're ready." Harry exited the room and closed the door.

As he paced the hallway, Harry wondered if this would become less awkward for them with time--for however long that would be. Harry didn't consider himself a shy person, but this situation seemed to be bringing out aspects of himself that he never knew existed. He'd never expected to feel the same level of animosity toward anyone as he had for Voldemort, but the person who cast this spell had earned his deepest loathing. His hand fisted in frustration. He didn't even know who this person was.

His thoughts were interrupted when he heard Ginny call out, "Harry... you can come in now." Harry opened the door and was surprised to see that she'd dimmed the light in the room quite a bit and the draperies had been drawn tightly over the windows. Looking to the bed, he found Ginny much as she had been the night before--lying in the bed, the covers pulled up high.

As he looked at Ginny, his heart skipped a beat. If the sinking sensation in his stomach were any indication, this wasn't going to be any easier than last night. He quietly moved to the other side of the bed, undressed and, slipping his wand under his pillow, slid between the sheets.

He shifted closer to Ginny on the bed and rolled over on his side to face her. "Well... here we are... again," he began clumsily.

Ginny turned to face him, a curious look on her face. "Yes..." She rolled onto her back and appeared to be studying the canopy above them. Harry hated this... more than anything he could remember ever hating. Normally he did not have any problem finding things to talk to Ginny about. Of course, this was anything but normal. And it wasn't as if conversation was required. He just felt that if they could find something to talk about, the knot of tension in his chest might lessen.

A part of him ached to reach out and make love to Ginny like she deserved. But he just couldn't do that. He wasn't doing this out of love, or even just pleasure. And neither was she. Deep down, he felt that if it weren't for their current situation, he might like to try. But knowing that Ginny wasn't his... that she belonged to another man, caused the guilt to twist in Harry's gut. It was like opening a present you knew was meant for someone else. The emotions that surfaced in him made him ashamed. He recognized one as envy... pure and simple. He was jealous of Mark. Harry might have sex with Ginny, but she didn't love him. The sex was simply an act... clinical and detached. It was going through the motions, devoid of the connections he so longed for. The pain it brought him was indescribable.

Harry couldn't even bring himself to pretend with Ginny. It didn't seem right to caress her... to fondle her and imagine that she wanted him. No matter how he wished otherwise, it couldn't be. To try would be a lie. Ginny didn't deserve that... she deserved so much more.

Unfortunately, Harry knew that even if he couldn't give Ginny what she deserved, he owed it to her to treat her with as much gentleness and caring as he could. He needed to draw on the feelings of friendship that he felt for her, to express his respect and try to make this whole situation as bearable for her as he could.

With an inward sigh, he reached out his hand and picked up a lock of her hair. Rubbing it between his fingers, he marveled at the silky feel. Moving closer to her, he gently touched his fingers to her jaw and turned her face towards his. His heart, already in pieces, shattered further at seeing the apprehension in her eyes. As if pleading for her trust, he whispered softly, "Ginny..."

He closed the distance between them. Watching her eyes drift shut, he brought his lips down on her mouth. Simple and sweet, he reveled in her softness. He was surprised when her lips parted in invitation, but did not hesitate to taste her. His body pressed against hers and his hand slipped behind to tenderly cup her head. As their tongues tangled together, he felt a shock of tingling race to the top of his spine, where her fingers now entwined in his hair.

Without the pressure of time slipping away, Harry found himself getting lost in the sensations. He slipped his other arm under her to pull her tightly against him. His fingers gently pressed her bare skin where his hand rested in the small of her back. His body seemed to have a mind of its own as he pushed his pelvis against hers and undulated. A low moan escaped from deep in his throat.

Breaking their kiss, he raised his head and looked down upon Ginny. Her lips were parted slightly and her breathing was rapid and shallow. Harry couldn't contain the desire he felt for her at that moment and buried his face in her hair. As he inhaled her light perfume, his lips sought out the smooth skin of her neck and he placed light kisses on her pulse point. Removing his hand from her head, he reached out of take hold of his wand.

When he pulled back from her to perform the spell to prepare her, her hand slipped from his hair and she rested it lightly on his chest. Her warm fingers caused a shiver of pleasure to shoot to his groin. At the same time he said "Lubricus" he looked at her to find her mouth open as if to say something. The spell washed over her causing her eyes to roll back and close. When she opened them, she quickly closed her mouth and gave Harry a flustered look.

"What?" he asked anxiously. "Is something wrong?"

She shook her head slightly and replied, "Nothing... it was nothing." She gave him a small, reassuring smile.

He hesitated and slipped his wand back underneath his pillow. Feeling as if he had somehow erred, he said again, "I'm sorry."

"Honestly, Harry..." she said with a shy smile, "you are going to have to stop apologizing."

Before he could catch himself, he automatically said, "I'm sorry." Ginny gave a small laugh and shook her head. Removing her hand from his chest, she reached for his shoulder and pulled him back down into a smoldering kiss.

Harry again felt her body's resistance when he began to enter her. He immediately stopped when she sucked in a breath. His brows were knit in concern as he watched her, eyes closed and obviously fighting to relax. Something wasn't right. He knew she wouldn't be completely accustomed to this invasion of her body, not after just one time. But he didn't think she should be feeling this much discomfort. Once again, he was overwhelmed with worry that he had really injured her last night.

"Ginny..." he whispered, willing his body to cease its demands for movement, "are you all right?"

"It's okay," she answered through gritted teeth. "Just keep going. I'll be fine." When he didn't move she said, "Really."

Harry tried to be as gentle as possible, keeping his movements fluid and slow. Within moments, he could feel her tension ease a bit and he felt relieved. He made a note to himself that he would need to search for some way to make this easier for her. He had to admit that his knowledge of a woman's body was limited... and certainly more so when it came to someone who was so inexperienced. He couldn't help but feel a little disconcerted--he never had problems pleasing a woman before. On the other hand, those other women had also been able to tell him in no uncertain terms just what he had to do to please them. But ultimately, he was not concerned about his abilities for himself, he was eminently more concerned for her sake.

With Ginny more relaxed, Harry was soon concentrating less on his thoughts and more on the incredible sensations he felt with her. He took his time, savoring her warmth. He captured her mouth once again, his hands cradling the sides of her face. His movements grew more insistent as the heat began to build inside him. One hand slid from her cheek to her waist where his fingers dug in for more purchase. Taking his mouth from hers, he once again buried his face in her hair. His lips just inches from her ear, he groaned softly, "Oh God..." and let the wave of release wash over him.

As Harry lay still trying to regain his equilibrium, he realized he had let his weight drop onto Ginny. He slipped from her body and, carefully, shifted to lie by her side.

They lay in silence for a long time. As his heartbeat returned to normal, Harry let himself be wrapped in his own thoughts. He knew that once again Ginny was left bereft and it bothered him. Although they were being forced into this, Harry cared about Ginny very much. She was his friend and he thought, at the very least, he could try to make this as pleasant an experience for her as he could. It was bad enough that she had been robbed of a once-in-a-lifetime experience she had planned on sharing with her husband. He couldn't let this continued and renewed his vow to try to find a way to help her. When the clock on the mantle chimed, Harry turned his head and, squinting without his glasses, tried to make out the hands on the dial.

"It's half five," Ginny said, shifting in the bed to look at him.

"I guess we should be thinking about getting back to The Burrow," he replied. He winced as he remembered they would be facing Ginny's brothers tonight.

"I'll just go back to my room to get ready..." she said, pulling the covers close around her. "If you'll just turn around so I can get dressed--"

"That reminds me... I have something for you," Harry said with a grin. Leaning across her, he retrieved his glasses and put them on. He pulled his wand from under the pillow pointed it toward his bureau and called out, "Accio." If he couldn't make the physical experience satisfying, he hoped that his gift might bring Ginny some pleasure.

The wrapped bundle that Hedwig had left in his room flew into his hands. With a sheepish look on his face, he held the package out to Ginny. "I saw this today in Diagon Alley... I thought it would look nice on you." He fell silent, thinking he really had no good excuse for buying her a present. He hoped that she would not be uncomfortable accepting it.

With a curious look at Harry, Ginny pulled herself up into a sitting position, tucking the sheet securely under her arms. She took the gift from Harry's hands and laid it in her lap. "You didn't have to buy me anything, Harry," she began, "but thank you." She smiled sweetly at him and dropped her gaze to the package. As she fumbled with the knots in the string, he recognized the anticipation behind her subtle smile. Harry smiled inwardly and was pleased to note that Ginny definitely appreciates surprises. Good, he thought, there's one way to make her happy.

When the wrapping finally fell away, Ginny gave a small gasp. "Oh, Harry... it's lovely!" she exclaimed as her fingers swept over the soft, sea green satin.

Harry laughed. "You might try pulling it out to see what it is before saying that."

Grasping the edges of fabric, she pulled upward and watched the material unfold. "Oh my..." she said softly, holding it high and gazing at it admiringly.

Harry gave a strangled sound and his eyes widened. Almost forgetting himself, he quickly looked away. As she'd lifted her arms to view the entire gown, Ginny did not realize that the sheet had fallen away from her chest. Harry heard her gasp and thought she must have recognized what had happened. He risked a quick peek and saw her clutching the dressing gown to her front.

Clearing his throat and attempting to pretend that nothing had happened, he said, "I thought the color would be beautiful on you." In his mind, he couldn't agree more... especially with the charming pink blush currently on her face.

Ginny composed herself and smiled at him. "Thank you, Harry. It is lovely." Twirling one finger in a circular motion, she said, "Do you mind?"

Harry immediate took the hint and turned away from her so that she could put on the gown. He felt her leave the bed and had to fight his desire to turn back around to watch her. Though it shamed him, he wanted desperately to see all of her body. So far, she had mostly remained covered during their encounters. Between that, having his glasses off and the room being darkened, he had seen very little. The brief moment when her breasts were exposed was really the most he had seen of her. That glimpse was enough to fuel his fantasies.

"You can look now," she told him.

Harry turned back around and viewed the woman standing before him. The word "breathtaking" suddenly had meaning to him. As his eyes swept over her form, he searched for words to express how beautiful she was. Giving up on finding the perfect word, he simply whispered, "Wow."

"You do have good taste," she commented. Harry watched longingly as her hands caressed the silky fabric over her thighs. She met his eyes and added, "It's stunning."

"Yes, you are," he replied in soft breath.

She glided to him, bent down and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you," she repeated and smiled brightly. She stood and turned to walk to her room.

Harry watched her walk away, his gaze lingering over the slight sway of her hips... hearing the soft rustled of the satin. When she had slipped through the doorway and quietly pulled the door, he closed his eyes and dropped back into the pillow with a groan.

He didn't know how he was going to survive this.