Silent All These Years

Chapter 4: "Don't Dream, It's Over"

"...you'll never see the end of the road while you're traveling with me."

*~*~*~*~*

The moments following her simple accio incantation were a blur to Petunia. Her secret was no longer a secret; the skeleton in her closet was out now and dancing blatantly in front of Vernon's horrorstruck eyes. She turned her head away when she summoned her old wand because she couldn't bear to look at Vernon's face and see the disappointment and disgust that was inevitably there. At first, she didn't know if she'd even said the right spell, after all, it had been years and years since she last used it, or any magic as a matter of fact. Her answer quickly came at the sound of her wand breaking out of the trunk in the cupboard where she had stored it ages ago. In no time had it come flying out of the glass door to the terrace, whizzing and buzzing as it hurled towards her. Holding her right hand up, she caught it and winced as the thin piece of wood slapped against the flesh of her hand. For a fleeting few seconds, a stinging sensation spread over her palm, but she dared not drop the wand just because of several moment's pain.

As she looked over at Severus, she saw relief briefly overcome his features before he turned back to face the three hooded figures who had by now brandished their own wands. All three had their wands raised steadily before them in their right hands, the points of the wands were level where their eyes would've been had she been able to see their faces. They moved side by side in unison, their each step in rhythm with one another. Petunia's heart beat faster and faster, gradually becoming fainter as the seconds were marked by the abbreviated pulsations of a vein in her right temple. The vein had taken on a life of it's own as she could feel it clench and release under the thin blanket of skin. Clench... release... clench... release... clench... release...

Her wand felt foreign in her sweaty grasp. The last time she'd used it she'd been a teenager, newly expelled from Hogwarts. Her forehead creased, causing the imprints of both age and anger to appear there on the peach-colored flesh as memories from the past emerged from the grave Petunia had desperately and frantically thrust them into for the better part of her life. Her mind was a metaphorical trunk in the sense that it was like the trunk in the cupboard that housed the sentimentalities Petunia couldn't bear to forget about, but yet, didn't want to be reminded of day after day. There were certain things that she locked away into the deepest recesses of her psyche so that she could be sure they would never resurface to soil her daily thoughts. The only thing to ever free them from the repressive psychological prison in which Petunia had cast them was in her hand now. As she held that wand, her wand, she was bombarded with visions of times past--visions of friends, classes, magic and... Severus.

His once young face flashed before her mind's eye and instantaneously, she felt the anguish of having loved him, the betrayal of finding out he'd secretly joined that vicious group of murderers, rapists and torturers and the helplessness to do anything about it. Her anger became real when it stopped dwelling in her mind and set off to course through her veins. With every inch it moved, it left behind a raging fire of fury that soon consumed her whole body. It wasn't only her mind that was in this fight now, but also her body. Her eyes narrowed and her chin raised. The thin lips on the small mouth curled into a simpering smile of sinister abhorrence. Mrs. Petunia Dursley had been a distant memory of a few minutes ago. With an unflinching posture coupled with her wand in her raised hand, she had reverted back to Petunia Evans of yesteryear.

At last the trio of hooded figures stopped about fifty feet from where Severus and Petunia stood on the terrace. One of the concealed persons then spoke. It was a woman who sounded very familiar to Petunia. The woman's voice was not only very high-pitched, but mocking and contemptuous as well. Petunia felt that whomever was beneath that hood didn't have to taunt with words for the tone of her voice was derisive enough.

"Hello, Petunia," she cackled loudly. "Remember me?? By the look on your face I would say no. Tsk tsk. How unfortunate as you were always one of the more brilliant ones. I would say even more so than your sister. She was obviously not intelligent enough to keep herself alive, but I don't underestimate you, Petunia."

At the mention of her sister, Petunia's body was bathed in a new rage. How dare any one of these people mention her sister when it was one of their kind that killed her! Just who was this acerbic lady who hid her face like a coward?? That's exactly what all these profane, depraved Death Eaters did! They hid under robes and hoods and carried out their Dark Lord's deeds--murdering, pillaging, destroying... Not stopping until the stench of death tickled their nostrils.

Clench... release... clench... release... clench... release...

Petunia couldn't believe how unfaltering her voice was when she spoke. It hid none of the acrimony she felt inside. The tongue inside her head was as venomous as a cobra's spit. Her words were to be used as daggers, used to reduce the enemy to nothing more than the pile of filth of which they were composed. There were reasons that she had shunned magic for more than twenty years and four of those reasons were on her property right now. They were all barbaric freaks!

"Who are you?" Petunia demanded tersely.

"I am a servant of the Dark Lord!" the mystery woman answered proudly.

"Are servants of the 'Dark Lord' forbidden to show their faces?" Petunia asked impatiently. She glanced at the other two figures on either side the woman, but they neither flinched nor spoke.

Once again, the woman laughed, but her laughter lacked warmness and sanity. It sounded like the howls of a being gone far beyond the brink of madness. "Can you not place me, Petunia?? Does my voice not bring back a memory that surely you've carried around all these years?? Think, Petunia, think very hard back to the night in your seventh year when your world came crashing down around you, when you overheard something that you weren't suppose to hear..."

Severus stepped in and yelled angrily, "Stop!"

But Petunia thought back to her seventh year. There were several nights that she could remember, but none of them caught her attention, and she certainly didn't remember anyone fitting the description of this lunatic that stood in her yard making an outright spectacle of herself. Then several blurry, albeit evocative, images flashed vividly in her mind. Like the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, all the hazy, swirling fragments came together to form a picture. In the midst of a darkened room that housed many, many bookcases, Petunia saw her seventeen-year old self. This simple scene triggered her memory and the image in her mind began to tell a story that had been long forgotten. She recalled being out of bed late one night, one of many nights that she couldn't sleep. Being the type that always wanted to be resourceful and not waste any free time, Petunia would sneak off to the library and get a head start on homework and essays. Not only did this help her get ahead, but most of the time it would make her so tired that all she could think of on her way back to her room was the nice, warm bed waiting to comfort her exhausted body and the soft, fluffy pillows that were anxious to cradle her head. On one particular night, though, as she browsed the shelves in the library looking for a book for an essay due in Arithmancy, she heard whispering. Curiously, she tip-toed to the end of the bookcase and peeked around the corner. In the floor, between the two bookcases, she saw a group of four people sitting in a circle. They were all leaning into the circle, their heads almost touching at the center.

It took awhile for Petunia to ascertain what was being said because at that moment, her heart was pounding against so hard against her chest in fear that she could hear it in her head. When she finally calmed down, she heard fragments what her contemporaries were talking about.

"...It won't be long, he's growing stronger and more powerful..."

"...I'm going to join, too. My brother just joined..."

"...Mother and Father think it's what the Wizarding world needs..."

"...I know a lot of people who want to join..."

"...Severus Snape just joined..."

At the name Severus Snape, Petunia leaned around the corner of the library shelf a little farther. She had a special interest in Severus as they'd been seeing each other since her fifth year. Unfortunately, she just heard bits and pieces of the foursome's conversation, and only when the respective speaker became too enthusiastic about what he or she was speaking about and consequently, grew a little loud. This caused a reaction of extreme consternation from the other members and prompted an immediate shushing. More than several times Petunia heard someone hissing, "Keep your voice down!" One of the voices sounded suspiciously like that of Rodolphus Lestrange, a popular Slytherin boy.

No matter how far Petunia craned her neck around the shelf, the secretive conversation being discussed on the floor of the library didn't become any more comprehendible. From what she could hear, Severus's name wasn't mentioned any more and though she was curious to know what they were talking about, she knew better than to stay around that lot. They were Slytherins (Rodolphus only befriended other Slytherins), and except for Severus, she didn't associate with them. On the whole, they were bad news. None of them were to be trusted. Somehow, though, Severus had transcended the prejudice she'd held against that particular house and had earned Petunia's trust which had taken several years to mature and blossom. It was only natural that he'd been highly apprehensive of her as well, but during their years at Hogwarts, they'd become accustomed to keeping company with each other. Time had had the same affect on their relationship that it had on wine.

Realizing that she would be better off going back to her dormitory before the group could be alerted of her presence, she started to turn around and tip-toe off. Unluckily for her, escaping would not be so clean cut. When Petunia turned around and tried to step quietly away, she tripped over a raggedly, skeletal-looking dust-colored cat. Though she caught herself by grabbing a hold of a shelf of the nearest and most convenient bookcase, in the process, she had also managed to drop her thick Arithmancy book from the safety of her arms. It made a resounding thud when it made contact with the floor.

When she'd calmed down and regained her balance, she looked around for Filch's cat but didn't see her. Oh no, Petunia thought, Mrs. Norris has gone to get that filthy squib and I'm going to get in trouble! But Filch seemed to melt away from her worries as four angry-looking Slytherins stood before her. The tallest boy, Rodolphus, the one voice that Petunia had identified, grabbed her arm roughly.

"You silly girl!" He spat irately, "You're going to get us in trouble! Quickly, come this way!"

In any other situation, Petunia would've protested being touched by this deceitful and arrogant worm in any shape or form, but she'd worked so hard this year to earn the best of marks to screw up by getting caught roaming the castle after curfew. She was a seventh year and knew there would be no leniency, especially if she were caught by McGonagall or the Headmaster. So, with the four Slytherins she ran to the back of the library and through a door that led into a darkened room. Almost inaudibly, one of the other boys, whom Petunia knew as Regulus Black, shut the door. For several minutes, the five of them stood deathly still in the obscurity of the room, too afraid to breathe for the fear that Filch would hear them.

Rodolphus's hand was still on her upper arm, but not as painfully as when he'd first seized her. Now was not the time to protest being manhandled as it could mean certain punishment for all of them. Minutes upon minutes slowly went by and finally after hearing nothing from the library, Rodolphus declared that they were out of trouble, for the moment at least. Then he muttered lumos and a small but bright light emitted from the tip of his wand. He held it up to Petunia's chin, illuminating her defiant face. His face was less than charming as his eyebrows met with fury and his mouth was twisted in rage.

"What do you mean listening to our conversation like that?! Do you not know any better than to mind your own business?!"

Petunia stood her ground and bore her flaming eyes into him. With her nose in the air, she talked to him as though she were looking down her nose at him, even though he stood a couple inches taller than her. "I speak to no one with a wand at my neck! Remove it now!"

"Or you'll do what exactly?? I don't see your wand about you. Or are you hiding it?" Rodolphus laughed in a mocking tone.

"I don't need a wand, you pompous prat," Petunia snarled acidly.

"You must be joking," he laughed merrily. "Wandless magic is virtually unheard of. I know of only a handful of people who have mastered it. One of them is a student here at Hogwarts and he's a Slytherin, definitely not the type to go around teaching pathetic little schoolgirls like you such an exacting art. You're no Slytherin, or I would know your name. So, I don't believe you!"

"Wait," Petunia turned her head just slightly to see a girl with a long face and shiny hair approach Rodolphus from behind. "I believe that she's telling the truth, Rodolphus. Don't you recognize her? She's the girl that Severus has been seeing these past couple of years."

"That seventh-year Ravenclaw?? The mudblood??"

That most contemptuous, detestable word burned Petunia's ears as the sound of it traveled through them. The instant she heard the incendiary remark, the sound of an incantation left her lips loudly. Four sets of eyes watched Rodolphus fall to the ground, unable to get back up.

"I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs!" He shouted frightened.

Regulus now brandished his own wand and pointed it at her.

"Now do you believe me, Rodolphus?" Petunia flared. Then she turned to Regulus and warned, "Regulus, I would put that away if I were you. I've already proven that I don't need a wand to send you to the floor like your pitiable friend here."

"Yes, Regulus, lower your wand," the girl said furtively. Petunia was suspicious, but she didn't make a move. The girl bent over and retrieve Rodolphus's still lit wand from the floor and held it up in front of her. Petunia could see her face more clearly now. It was highlighted in a pale glow cast from the light of the wand. Her eyes were a clear blue in color. The smile that graced her lips was catlike in its reticence.

"It takes a brilliant mind as yours to do magic like you just did. Was this a gift from Snape? Did he teach you magic that had been passed down in the Snape family from generation to generation?" The smirking girl took a couple of steps towards Petunia. "I find it odd that he thinks you worthy of learning an art confined exclusively to pure-blooded families. But perhaps he felt sorry for you because of your most unfortunate birth. After all, you can't help which family that you're born into, can you?"

Petunia drank this speech in and listened, hoping that the girl would reveal the discussion she and her fellow Slytherins had been having about Severus back in the library. To get information about Severus, she would take the insults now and be offended later. Her blood boiled to be in the company of these prejudiced, poor excuses of witch and wizards, but she held her tongue and was attentive.

"I must say, it is a pity that your brilliance go wasted, Evans. You would've made a great Slytherin if you had been born of pure blood. You have all the traits that define us--cunningness, intelligence, craftiness--but as the daughter of muggles, your blood is too diluted with qualities that would lessen our stock. All Slytherins recognize that mudbloods are less than worthy of being called witch or wizard and should not be allowed to study magic. We all know that magical learning should be entrusted only in the hands of those most worthy. All Slytherins know that. So, that brings up a very important question. Why in the world would Snape, a most laudable and newly-made servant of the Dark Lord, want to teach you the magical arts of any type?? Especially wandless magic?"

Petunia gasped, but silently so as not to show any signs of weakness. Surely, this witch was lying. Severus, her Severus, wouldn't join that group of perverse wizards. He wasn't as indecent as that! She had known him since his third year, her fourth year, at Hogwarts. They'd studied, talked and learned together. She'd opened her heart to him! Severus was the first person she'd let glimpse into her soul. Joining the Death Eaters was just something that he could not do, Slytherin or not. Pure-blood or not!

Betraying herself, she screamed out, "You're lying! Severus wouldn't join the Death Eaters! He's different than the rest of you!"

The girl cackled with an utmost cruel countenance. "You don't know him as we do, Evans. He is just like the rest of us. That's why he's a Slytherin. You can't be sure that he's not just using you for some greater purpose. Perhaps the Dark Lord has something in store for you mudbloods and you're just Snape's little experiment." Her face looked pained to don the sadistic smile that planted itself there.

Petunia didn't know what to think. Severus was a Death Eater? ? He was just using her?? Were all the years of mutual companionship all a façade?? She couldn't believe these statements that left this bitter girl's mouth. They had to be falsehoods!

At once, she wanted to go to Severus and beg him to tell her that what she'd been told were nothing but lies. She wanted him to laugh at her like he always did when she spoke of something he deemed nonsensical. This would be the one exception that she wouldn't hex him for it. But she couldn't do that. There was an element of trust that she and he had built up because of incidents like these that were likely to occur. He being Slytherin would obviously be a problem for her, and her not being a Slytherin would without a doubt be a predicament for him. That was the fundamental cause of the disdain they originally had for one another. She thought they'd gotten passed the issues that had threatened to divide them a long while ago, but apparently this was not so. Before she went and accused Severus of the most heinous of acts he could ever commit, she would calm down and investigate the matter further. It didn't mean, though, that the matter wouldn't weigh heavily on her mind.

"I refuse to listen to such rubbish! Especially from the likes of you!!" Petunia declared boldly, regaining her insubordinate stance with her nose thrust in the air proudly. Her lips curled in condescension and the superior air that had marked her throughout her life returned.

Sneering, the girl stood before Petunia so that there wasn't an inch between the ends of their noses. The tone of her voice coldly teased Petunia. "I've already succeeded in planting seeds of doubt within you, Evans. I can see it in your eyes. They're scared. I would be, too, if I were a lowly mudblood and my boyfriend was a Death Eater. Mark my words, the Dark Lord will rise to save the wizard world from the likes of you soon, and when there are Death Eaters standing over you, ready to curse you into oblivion, I hope on one side stands your boyfriend, Severus Snape and on the other side stands me--"

"Bellatrix Black!!" the adult Petunia shouted. She gradually became aware of her surroundings as the dark room at the rear of the library melted into that of her backyard on Privet Drive. The robed Death Eater with a shrilly voice had finally been named.

"How good of you to remember, Petunia, however it's Bellatrix Lestrange now. Did you have a nice trip down Memory Lane?"

A thoroughly disgusted Petunia answered, "I haven't any particularly nice memories of that period of my life. That's why I've been living as a muggle all these years. It was better to live as a normal muggle than to run around uncivilized and loutish as you freaks!"

"No need to hold grudges, dearie. After what Severus did to you, you allowed him into your home, did you not?"

"I don't care what Severus did. That was in the past." She tried her best not to care, but an old hurt crept into her heart. Swallowing hard, she refused to look at the man next to her, only at the woman in front of her.

Bellatrix pretended not to hear Petunia, but continued her provocative rant. "To think that you can forgive a man after he orchestrated the death of your sister and brother-in-law," she clicked her tongue thrice. "Now that takes a lot of swallowing of the pride."

"What?" Petunia whispered, scrunching her eyebrows in confusion. She had never, ever thought that he would've been involved in the deaths of Lily and James! That wasn't possible, was it? Of all the people she had assumed that he'd probably killed, she at no time thought that her sister and brother-in-law would be among those that fell victim to Severus's wand!

Severus saw his ally weaken at Bellatrix's stinging words and crossly yelled, "Don't be daft, Petunia! I'd never in my life thought of ever harming the Potters, let alone kill them! I had too much pity for the unfortunate being that would be forced to raise that incorrigible son of theirs!"

Turning to look at him, she said hotly, "You lied to me once, what makes you think that I should believe you now!"

"For Merlin's sake, woman, don't you see what she's trying to do?!" he whispered impatiently. "She's trying to divide us! Put aside your pettiness so that we can keep them from taking Potter!"

The Death Eaters, however, took advantage of the diversion as Bellatrix shouted out a hex directed at Severus. But before he could respond, Harry had jumped through the glass door to the terrace that had been sealed and yelled, "Protego!"

"You never listen do you, Potter?!" Snape roared furiously at the boy, even though Harry had just repelled a curse that had been aimed towards the Potions Master.

"Harry, get back inside!" Petunia screamed.

Although Harry refused to listen, Vernon, who'd been scared out of his wits as he silently watched the exchange between his wife and these weirdoes, took the opportunity to run as fast as he could into the house. His wife didn't even notice. She had more important things going on.

Just as Vernon exited the terrace, another curse had been hurling into the air in which Snape had deflected, right before he had sent out a hex of his own. Petunia was frantic trying to remember the spell that disarmed opponents so that she could be of some use. It was something that sounded similar to "expel..." There was a saying that she'd learned in her second year DADA class... What was it?? It was right on the tip of her tongue. In fact, she was certain that it had been Severus that had taught her such a saying once when they were studying...

To

something others, you will scream...

No, that doesn't sound right

, she thought.

Wait. To disarm others, you will shout...

No, that's not it either

. What is that blasted spell?! Spell... Spell... I'll yell the spell...

Then it came to her:

To disarm others, say a simple spell, thus it's EXPELLIARMUS you will yell!

In a hesitant voice, she screeched, "EXPELLIARMUS!"

The wand of the person to Bellatrix's right had flown directly and swiftly into Petunia's left hand. The Death Eater now tried to run behind Bellatrix and the other person who were exchanging curses with Severus and Harry. The mysterious person didn't make it, as he was hit by a stunner, courtesy of Petunia (that is, after she'd heard it used by Severus). With one Death Eater lying unconscious, she could help Severus and Harry take care of the others.

Her confidence was returning bit by bit. The more curses she heard shouted, the more her memory was triggered. Dozens of spells flooded her mind. They might have been stored in the farthest depths of her memory, but when she recollected them, it was as if they'd been just below the surface of her subconscious. Though rusty, Petunia dueled efficiently along with her nephew and his professor for some time. That is, until something went horribly wrong.

The other Death Eater, a man, sent a stunner towards Severus, who was battling with Bellatrix. He'd either not expected it, or not heard it, but he was knocked to the ground where he lay crumpled--his eyes shut, his face unnaturally peaceful. Even though she knew better, it didn't keep Petunia from thinking that he looked dead.

It was so like Severus to leave her alone to fight these heathens! She'd have to fight them alongside her nephew. A long-lived hatred sheathed her body. Bellatrix Black or Lestrange or whatever her name was, had taunted her as a teenager for her muggle birth, Severus had lied about being a Death Eater and had probably killed Lily and on top of that, three Death Eaters had attacked her family--her perfectly fine, normal, muggle family. Now a burning fury borne of hell raged inside her, greater than ever. It was too late to do anything about it, for Bellatrix caught her off guard and screamed, "Locomotor mortis!"

"Aunt Petunia, watch out!!"

In the instant that Petunia's legs had locked, causing her to fall down painfully, Harry had sent a stunner hurling towards the other Death Eater, sending him limp and unresponsive to the ground. Now, it was just Bellatrix and Harry. No matter how much animosity she'd felt towards the boy since he'd been dropped off on her and her family, she felt nothing but helplessness and anguish over not being able to aid him now. She could only watch as this evil witch stole Harry away to her Dark Lord. In silence, she cursed that whole awful world that she'd sworn to leave behind in her youth.

Clenchreleaseclenchreleaseclenchrelease...

Shutting her eyes, she no longer wished to witness the inevitable. Petunia felt as though she'd failed her sister. It was almost certain that her nephew would meet the same fate as his parents. In the solace of her mind, she tried to recall images of Lily so that she could come close to feeling the same pain as her sister and now her nephew had felt. If only she knew the blasted countercurse she could help him! The second that she had found Harry on her doorstep, she should've become reacquainted with magic, if only for his sake. How could she have been so thick not to realize how much danger Harry was in?!

At that moment, the mysterious voice, the voice that haunted her dreams and surfaced unwanted in her thoughts, returned to her, more urgent than ever. Had she not been so powerless and desperate for any type of miracle, she would've been startled and discomforted. Hungrily, she listened to it's wisdom amid the backdrop of her nephew's screams, attributable to the cruciatus curse, no doubt. His screams tore at her, but she had to listen to this voice. Once it told her what she needed to know, she noiselessly spoke the countercurse that released her and ran over to her nephew.

"Aunt Petunia!" screamed a hoarse and weakened Harry as he saw his aunt coming towards him, "NO!"

"Avada kedavra!"

Harry saw the deadly green light and closed his eyes. He'd witnessed so much death, that he didn't want to see anymore. The torturous cries sounded like they were spiraling down a tunnel of endlessness, traveling farther and farther away until they ultimately ceased. When the screams were no more and when their echoes had died, Harry knew that the curse had claimed his aunt. He was at the mercy of Bellatrix Lestrange now, the obedient servant to Voldemort. Waiting, he knew that at any moment he would be face to face with her beloved Dark Lord. Let him just take him. He didn't care anymore.

But nothing happened. He didn't feel the pain of the cruciatus nor did he feel as though he was being whisked away by a portkey. Cautiously, Harry opened his eyes, but instead of being in the audience of Voldemort, he saw his aunt towering over him, stony-faced and almost regal in posture. Her wand was still in her hand which was now lazily dangling at her side. Never before had he been so unafraid of his mother's sister or glad that she stood over him as she did right now.

Petunia stared at her own destruction, never flinching from the sight of the stilled body.

Clenchreleaseclenchreleaseclenchrelease...

She'd never used an Unforgivable before. In no way did she think she would ever use it. Severus had told her something long ago back in their schooldays at Hogwarts concerning the avada kedavra, the cruciatus and the imperious curses, "You can tell a bad witch or wizard from a good one by noticing his or her response to the Unforgivables. If after using one, a wizard can walk away unbothered, don't ever turn your back to him. Only the good wizard will be stripped naked of every belief in goodness and faith in wizardkind, causing him to reevaluate his view on right and wrong. Time alone will abate the shock, but you will never really forget the experience. A good wizard will lament, a bad one will hunger."

It was a good sign, she supposed, that she felt raw.

"Get up," she instructed her nephew softly, but with iron backing her words. Confused and still in pain, Harry did as he aunt told him to. Grunting, he managed to stand before her unfeeling gaze. In a detached and impassive voice, she said, "Put ropes around those other two Death Eaters. Consider it punishment for not listening to your professor and me."

Unquestioningly, Harry quietly went about murmuring incantations that made ropes suddenly appear around the still unconscious Death Eaters. Though still shaken from his brush with the Death Eaters, his mind buzzed. His aunt, the one who'd insulted his magical parents, who'd pretended that the magical world didn't exist, who'd wanted nothing to do with that kind, the one whom he would never have guessed in a thousand years to be a witch, had just used an Unforgivable. Aunt Petunia was a genuine, authentic witch. If he hadn't been here to see her with a wand in hand and shouting out curses, he would've never believed it to be true. He was so awed and surprised that it was only natural that he had many questions that he wanted to ask, but lacked the courage to do so. Instead, he obeyed his aunt's request. Petunia, however, walked pokerfaced back into the house. She passed Severus, still lifeless laying on the grass, too numb to use ennervate to restore him to consciousness.

On the outside, she looked like she cared nor worried about a single thing, on the inside though, she was weighed down with several burdens. One concern was that her life would never be the same again. Her husband knew now that he'd married a witch and that she'd lied to him from the beginning. Also, she'd killed another human being. Would she ever be able to get over it? Would that eerie green light frequent her dreams and wake her from the deepest of sleep? The other concern was that Severus had played a part in her sister and brother-in-law's death. It wasn't only enough that he sneaked around and joined that destructive, ruinous faction of evil, but he had to hurt her further by plotting to kill Lily and her family. How foolish she had been to trust a damned Slytherin! The others were right, Slytherins turned out only the worst of witches and wizards and Severus was no exception.

Foolish child! What an extraordinarily stupid girl she'd been! She'd craved a challenge so much, intellectually as well as emotionally, that she'd stooped so low as to have appointed Severus as that challenge. He was attractive in that he was as mysterious as she. He was like her in that he was guarded, distrustful of everyone and hurt. In each other, they'd found peace and acceptance. But now, she thought, they weren't as much alike as she had initially thought.

Once inside her living room, Petunia sat down on the edge of her sofa. She sat stiffly with her back straight as a board and her trembling hands in her lap, still grasping her wand. For the moment, she was unaware of her surroundings. The only thing she noticed was the vein in her head rapidly clenching and releasing. It wasn't long before she became hypnotized by the monotonous repetition of the pulsations. Her eyes were open and unblinking and yet, she did not see. Oblivion threatened to encroach her, that is until her infuriated husband roused her from the catatonic-like state she was in.

"Petunia, how could you?!" Vernon bellowed. "You're just like one of them--those freaks!"

Petunia blinked a couple of times and gazed up at him puzzled. "What?"

Her husband stood before her looking very distraught and disturbed. His face was violet in color and his eyes were narrowed substantially.

"You are one of them! Like your nephew, you are!"

Dumbfounded, she answered slowly, "Yes. Yes, I am."

"Is that all you have to say??"

She thought for a moment and at once, the repercussions of her actions hit her. The time of impact had come and she was being held accountable by Vernon. Remorseful, she bowed her head, and when she did, she saw the wand in her hand--that dirty, repulsive wand! Appalled, she brutally threw it down to the floor in front of her. Shooting up from where she sat, she moved away from it and went towards her husband, but he stepped away from her as though she had a contagious disease.

Befuddled by Vernon's behavior, she became panicked and questioned, "Vernon, what's wrong?"

"Petunia, you're... you're a... a..." He lowered his voice to say a word that had long been avoided in the Dursley household. As though it were a curse in itself, Vernon whispered it scornfully, "Witch!"

Petunia's lip quivered and she thought she would cry. Never had she wanted to hurt her husband this way. If it hadn't been for that nephew of hers and that bastard Severus, none of this would've happened. If she went back far enough, Petunia was sure that Lily shared in that blame somehow. Sorrow masked her face and as she pleaded, her words faltered, "Vernon, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, Vernon! Please forgive me! I had no choice! I had to save Harry! He would've been killed!"

"I told you last summer that we should've gotten rid of him!"

"We couldn't do that. We made a promise to take him in!"

Vernon started pacing the room, looking up at his wife only to shout his acidic words so that they might sting her with the anger and betrayal that he felt. "But what about Dudley and me?! You take in that little freak and put us at risk!"

Moving quickly to stand beside him, she put her hand on one of his arms and implored, "I didn't know this would happen! This wasn't suppose to happen, I don't know how they found him!"

"But it did happen, Petunia! And not only were we attacked by freaks, but I find out that you're one of them! When were you going to tell me?!"

Her husband's accusations stung Petunia. The tears she'd been holding back trickled listlessly down her cheek and lingered on her jaw line. Turning her sad, glossy eyes to Vernon she confessed, "Never. I--I left that part of me behind so long ago. I made up my mind when I was younger to wash my hands of magi--that stuff and to bury the memories of that part of my life. I swear, I didn't mean to hurt you, Vernon, or to lie to you. When I met you, I'd finally found the normality that I'd been looking for. Believe me, please believe me, I never thought I'd use mag--that stuff again!"

Gruffly, Vernon asked, "Then why did you keep the wand??'

Helpless, Petunia couldn't answer the question. Why had she kept it if she hadn't planned on using it again? She could feel Vernon's heated gaze on her.

"It seems to me that Mrs. Dursley has been lying to everyone all these years."

Both Petunia and Vernon snapped the heads around to look at a conscious Severus who'd come in through the terrace door. He stood tall with his hands behind his back. Unlike Vernon, his manner was ambivalent. Though he remained terse and to the point, the expression on his face begged to ask questions, and many of them. When he looked directly into her eyes, Petunia knew what he was attempting to do and averted her face elsewhere.

"No one asked you to join this conversation," she snapped coldly as she wiped her eyes.

"Get out of my house!" Vernon yelled. "This is a conversation between my wife and myself!"

Severus snarled, "I would only be too happy to be able to finally leave this house, but before I go, I wanted to alert Mrs. Dursley to the fact that the Ministry is here and they are requesting to interrogate her about the happenings of this afternoon."

"There are more of you on my property?! Petunia, look what you and that nephew of yours has done! What will the neighbors think??" Vernon waddled over to the window and pulled back the curtain to get a better view of officials from the Ministry of Magic that occupied his backyard.

"It won't matter what they think after the Ministry officials question them then obliviate their memories."

"Tell them," Petunia seethed, "that they've caused me enough headaches for a lifetime. If they've already talked to you and Harry and everyone else who saw this little fiasco, they don't need to hear my version. And while you're at it, tell them that if they don't take the boy, that he's going to be homeless because I'm not going to put my family at any more risk! If he's going to get blown up like his father and mother, he needn't take my family along with him!"

"I'll relay the message. In my own words, of course," Severus smirked and turned around to return to the terrace.

"See??" Vernon pointed out, "Even the neighbors know now that you're--that you're different!"

"They'll soon forget once their memories have been obliverated. Then they won't know a thing," explained Petunia, suddenly tired.

"I detest the use of the 'M' word on my property! I can't believe my own wife, the mother of my son, used the 'M' word in our own back yard! Was the boy worth saving that badly??" Vernon was now so livid that spit flew out of his mouth left and right. His face was so purple that Petunia feared that he would explode at any moment.

"I'm so very sorry, Vernon, but I had no choice. They might've killed all of us if I hadn't done something."

"Why didn't you just hand him over?? He's been nothing but trouble since he was dropped on our doorstep! Why should we care what happens to him??"

For a second, Petunia didn't answer. After swallowing hard, she looked Vernon straight in the eye and simply said, "Because he's my sister's son."

This answer didn't appease him a bit. In fact, it only served to further infuriate him. "You know, I married you despite the fact that your sister was one of them. I never held it against you because I thought that you were normal... And you repay me by inviting freaks and weirdoes into our house and telling me that you've always been one of their lot?!"

"REPAY?!" she shouted angrily through her tears. "So, you married me to do me a favor?! I didn't need your pity, Vernon!" Her jaw trembled with rage.

"Obviously not! If I'd known that you were of that kind I never would've said one word to you!"

It was true that for the last several minutes she'd felt a mixture of anger toward Vernon for his insensitive words with regard to her nephew and sister and remorse for her own hurtful actions as she knew his views towards magic and anything related to it, however when he revealed that he'd married her as a favor and that he never would have had anything to do with her otherwise, she felt as if she'd been stabbed through the heart. The hurt she felt was insurmountable.

"How could you say such a thing, Vernon?" she wept violently "I've been a good wife to you and a good mother to Dudley! I kept your house and made you happy. Never once in our marriage did I ever resort to using magic! Does it not count that I gave up magic and that other world before I married you??"

Vernon looked at his desolate wife, unmoved by her argument. "No. You lied to me and for that I can never forgive you, Petunia. Marge warned me before we got married. She told me to be careful, that if the sister is a bad egg, then there's bound to be something wrong with any other siblings. I didn't want to believe her. In fact, I didn't speak to her for several months after the wedding, but you know something? She was right. There's no difference between you and your ruddy sister!" Spit had gathered throughout his mustache. His words had left his mouth in sheer contempt. It didn't matter that the woman before him had been his faithful, loyal wife. All he saw before him was a wicked person who had deceived and lied to him. He shuddered at the thought of having married such a person.

Petunia was mortified. How could Vernon so easily turn on her?! "Vernon," she tried to reason as she walked up to him. Nevertheless, he stepped back and away from her. He wanted nothing else to do with her and he surely didn't want her to touch him. The stuff might rub off onto him! "Vernon, please don't, darling. I'll-I'll send the boy away. We'll never have to be bothered with him again. We can even move away from here, maybe to a nice little house in Edinburgh and put all of this behind us. Please, just don't--don't leave me! Oh God, Vernon, what would I do?!"

Petunia was becoming somewhat hysterical as the prospect of Vernon leaving became more real. With his each scathing remark, they grew further and further apart. It seemed that every accusation was a step nearer to a divorce.

Vernon laughed cruelly and then barked, "Petunia, I'm not going to leave you...You're going to leave! I will not having you living under my roof shaming me and Dudley! I want you out by tonight!"

"You can't mean it!" she squealed in a high pitched voice. Most urgently she spoke. "Where will I go?? What will I tell people when they start asking questions??"

Ruthlessly, Vernon answered, "I don't care what you tell them and I don't care where you go just as long as it's away from here!"

"What about Dudley? What will I tell him?! Vernon, it'll hurt him so much if you send me away!" she sniffled.

Her husband got a mad look in his eye and for once he advanced toward her rather terrifyingly. He pointed a fat finger into her face and growled, "You're not going to tell him anything! You're going to stay away from him, that's what you're going to do. It's good that he wasn't here to see this mess."

"But I'm his mother!" Petunia howled pitifully.

"As far as I'm concerned, Dudley doesn't have a mother anymore. If he has to put up with a lying, deceptive, con artist..."

"Dursley, if you finish that sentence then this wand will finish you."

Both Petunia and Vernon tore their eyes away from each other and turned to see Severus standing by the door with his hand, gripping his wand, slightly raised and pointed in the direction of Petunia's husband.

Wiping her eyes with one hand, Petunia admonished Severus in less than ferocious voice. In fact, it was almost timid and slightly exasperated. "I thought I told you to get out of our house?"

Severus put his wand away in his robes and gazed hard at Petunia, ignoring her husband. "I wanted to tell you that the Ministry officials are finished with Potter and myself. The headmaster wants him to return to Hogwarts. He is obviously no longer protected here, so he'll be packing his things and going with me."

"Good! Take him!" Petunia shouted manically.

Turning his head toward the door, he said, "Potter, hurry and pack your things. I don't have all day,"

Hesitantly, Harry came in and as he walked towards the stairs he looked at his aunt and uncle. When he'd heard Harry's footsteps on the stairs, Vernon turned to his wife once more and spoke harshly, "When they leave, so can you."

"I don't have anywhere to go, Vernon!"

"That's not my problem, Madam. Get out and never shadow my doorstep again. And one more piece of advice: don't try to contact Dudley because I'll know if you do. If I find out that you've been to see him or have tried to call or write him, I'll make sure you wish you hadn't."

Petunia whimpered, but Severus stepped forward briskly. Vernon snapped his head around to face the irritating stranger. In a deep, dark voice that could slice words like a knife, Severus asked, "Are you threatening her, Dursley?"

"I thought I'd already told you to stay out of my business, you freak?"

Once again, the Potions Master brandished his wand and pointed it at Vernon's chest. The bigger man looked down at the thin stick that was poking into the skin just over his heart and quivered slightly. "You'll keep your tongue civil when speaking with others. It is unwise to annoy someone with a wand, especially seeing that you don't have one." Upon enunciating that last syllable, the wand was withdrawn from Vernon's chest.

Embarrassed, Vernon addressed his wife in a most unpleasant tone. Gritting his teeth, he said slowly and pointedly, "Pack up your things and get out. I'm going out for a while. When I get back, you better be gone. I don't care where. I don't want to know. Don't contact Dudley under any circumstances and never attempt to contact me again." With that, he gave Severus a glare and went into the hallway. Petunia heard him slam the door on his way out.

Sinking to her knees, she then took the opportunity to break down in tears. She was homeless! Vernon had ordered her to get out! There wasn't anywhere she could go as her parents had been dead for years as was her only sister. Life as she knew it had crumbled like a sand castle in water. The only thing she wanted to do was just sit in the floor and weep for what she had lost.

For a minute, Severus watched her crying episode with an unsympathetic eye and when he could take no more, he demanded, "Petunia, get up. Now."

"I've lost everything!" she wailed as she stayed put. "Everything! My husband, my son, my life! It's gone!"

"You act as though your brain has been addled. Pull yourself together and stop your crying at once!"

Petunia jumped up and jabbed a slender, bony finger into Severus's chest, her swollen, red eyes boring into his cold, black ones. "This is your fault! This all your fault! And his!" She pointed her other finger to the ceiling, indicating Harry.

The Potions Master glared at her, "You've spent all your life blaming someone for the things that have happened in your life. It's time for you to take some responsibility! Stop blaming me, stop blaming your sister and stop blaming Potter for your own stupidity and weaknesses!"

"How dare you speak to me like that! I should curse you into oblivion!" She bent over and grabbed her wand off the floor. Pointing it at him, she gave him a look of extreme loathing. She wanted to say the curse, it dangled provocatively from her tongue trying to entice it's release from her mouth. Whatever curse she sent his way, he deserved.

He retorted in a most threatening voice, "Go ahead. Do it. But I must warn you, I am an expertise when it comes to curses that cause excruciating pain and discomfort. The moment that you curse passes your lips, I'll show you no mercy."

The couple exchanged murderous looks, but no more words were spoken until Harry came down the stairs with his trunk and owl's cage. When he saw his aunt and professor's wands pointed in each other's direction, he came to a sudden stop. Looking from his aunt to his professor, he said almost inaudibly, "Erm--I'm ready to go."

Without lowering his wand, Severus turned to look at Harry and his things. Only when he started giving Harry instructions did he discard his wand.

"As I told you before, we're going to the castle and upon arrival we are to go straight to the headmaster's office. Don't attempt to do anything foolish, because if you do, I promise that I won't give a second's thought to performing a cruciatus curse on you to keep you in line. If today taught you nothing, then you're as unimpressionable and as dense as your father. We're going to get there using a portkey." Severus took a book from a nearby bookshelf and set it on the coffee table where he muttered an incantation and waved his wand.

Before the pair set off on their way to Hogwarts, Severus informed Petunia, "One more thing, Mrs. Dursley, or will you be reverting back to Miss Evans?? Dumbledore had requested that you come with us as he wanted to talk to you about the events that transpired today, but I'm under the impression see that you'd rather stay here and try to work things out with that ignorant idiot of a husband of yours," he smirked. "Shall I give the headmaster your apologies?"

Petunia's first reaction was to pick up the nearest lamp and throw it at his head, but she wouldn't have been satisfied until she'd stripped him of everything as he had done her. If there was ever a time that she wished she could go back in time and remedy her mistake of befriending him, she would've. Would he never stop causing her pain? Perhaps Professor Dumbledore was her only hope. Maybe she could talk him into helping her somehow by maybe obliviating Vernon's memory or taking her magic away so that Vernon would let her come home or so that she could see her son. Hopefully, after complaining about Severus and the rudeness she had to endure from him whilst he was staying in her home, the headmaster would fire the worthless pile of dung and send him packing. Then where would he be? That's right. Right where I am right now, she cunningly smiled to herself.

Through the fog of her own misery, she could see the sun trying to break through. She would get her revenge one way or another. Even if Vernon and Dudley were returned to her, she'd get even with Severus for every wrong he committed against her from the first time they'd laid eyes on each other up until now. By the time she finished with him, he will be the one that wished he'd never laid eyes on her.

She stuck her wand in the pocket of her skirt and walked over to where Severus and Harry had gathered. With renewed confidence, she said, "No, I think I'll be coming with you."