Where Angels Fear to Tread…

Part 4: Love Birds

The very next morning Vesta was still up, trying to find a room where the mirror wasn't dangerous and unlocking charms wouldn't work. She had followed the dour Cornish chap down the hall and up the stairs.

"Is this room ... safe, Miss McGonagall?"

"Hang on." She flipped over the mirror.

It was a third floor room. They couldn't break in easily. "Those two gargoyles could be a problem." She looked out the window.

"We could put olive oil on em."

"And the bathroom. I could be attacked while I was taking a shower."

"You don't say. Really?" Argus Filch looked as if he didn't know whether to be interested or nervous.

"Well, yeah."

"Well..." Filch never imagined that life could be so dangerous. He went from white to blue.

"All it needs is a sound charm."

Vesta dusted her hands.

"This room will have to do. You just go on now. Now I'm going to check for bombs."

"B-b-b-bb," he stammered. She closed the door as he continued to stammer.

She ripped out her drawer and began looking.

It only took her about a half an hour to debug her entire room. She might need to do it again, but for now she could relax.

Vesta McGonagall still had yet to sleep.

She opened the carpet bag and took out two photographs.

The first one was a red haired man with green eyes and big plastic glasses. He blinked at the sunlight.

"There we go, Donnie."

She pulled out the photograph of herself.

In the picture, the aurors smiled. Even Polaris looked happy. Being the hot by proxy girls in the Aurors at the time was a bit of a lark for her. Not that she wasn't pretty. (It was just that no one ever figured it out.)

"Pub. It's been too long, Sarge."

She looked at the picture of the three of them posing with their wands, like in that muggle show, Charlie's Angels. They tossed their hair.

She could still hear James and Sirius goofing around in the office as they came back from a long beat chasing Death Eaters.

"Oh look, it's the Angels," Sirius said brightly. "Howdy girls. For once you can relax. I've been manning the phones all day and nothing yet."

"Shut up, Rookie." Polaris collapsed next to them.

"Come on, Sargie. Let me buy you a drink." Sirius held out his arm

"Let me sign out. I've got three minutes." Polaris didn't even pretend to disapprove of alcohol (excep twhen her brother drank it, of course).

"How about two drinks for Pols?" Vesta put her arm around James Potter and Denise mimicked her.

"And you, Mr. Potter. I'm not in charge of you. What does Head Iris Diggory have to say?"

"I'm just on call."'

"Angels, we know a hot place, just Muggles. It will relax you." Sirius hugged the girls.

"Not too hot." Vesta pinched James's cheek. "These two just had to go and get married."

"You, Denise, Polaris. I feel like I'm Charlie and you're the angels." James looked smug.

"That's what you get for getting married. This will be a lesson for you too, Didi. Never get married again." Vesta poked her.

"What are the Charlies angels?" Denise asked

"Nothing. It's muggle. And my wife thinks they're annoying." James shook his head.

"But they are great." Sirius grinned. "Crime fighting bikini babes." He punched one fist into the air.

James picked up his banana and held it like a muggle microphone.

"In the war against evil this highly trained unit of beautiful, talented operatives kick serious butt. They fight crime under the direction of Alastair Moody."

Sirius joined in in his deep voice "Denise Dikapolis, Code name Double D. This blond bombshell can take your breath away with a kick to the stomach. Specialties include Charms, Potions, and Covert OPs."

She kissed him on the cheek and began laughing her tail off.

"Brilliant." Vesta hugged Polaris.

James lowered his voice "And Polaris Black. Code name: Polar Ice. Tough as a hardtack cookie. From the other side of the tracks, a half blood with a heart of gold. Specialties: Charms, Hand to hand combat and interrogation."

"Vesta McGonagal," Sirius continued. "AKA Quick Draw McGraw, AKA McGirl, (AKA the Red headed tart whose name is in the bathroom stall). This Slytherin femme fatale leaves men with broken hears and broken fingers. Specialties: Charms, Dueling, and Espionage."

"They are Alastair's Angels."

James sang the entire theme song. Vesta had to applaud. Potter couldn't sing, but he certainly tried hard. And compared to Sirius's out of key howls, he sounded good.

"Halfblood with a heart of gold? Try Halfblood with a heart of cold." Polaris sneered at Potter, practically hissing.

"Now boys. Don't be so tough on my sis. She's tough and scary. But I know the truth. Deep inside her is a scared little girl trying to get out." Sirius wiped away a crocodile tear. "Poor little thing. It's too bad Polaris had to eat her."

Polaris actually smiled.

"Get to work, you two. You'll have time to fool around like this after the War. Let's get, Angels. I need a scotch and soda."

Denise scrunched up her nose at the thought of such a muggle drink, and they went off to the Leaky Cauldron.

She looked at herself then. Vesta's younger self had looked exceedingly like a femme fatale. Beautiful, dangerous, and heartless. A few less wrinkles and a tighter bottom, but still cold and professional. Polaris looked an ivory tower; pale skin and the icy gaze of a fanatic.

There was always the smart one, the sexy one and the nice one. Polaris was the studious Gryffindor. She herself was the Sexy Slytherin, the devastating, ruthless, man-eating auror.

Denise Dikapolis-Longbottom had had an angel's face, but a devil's eyes. The picture seemed to capture her mysterious blue eyes perfectly. Always playful, always lovely. Very nice. Very Hufflepuff.

They had gone to Hogwarts together. In those days the houses were more lax. She got a prickly feeling walking down the halls of the old dorm. How much Hogwarts seemed to change. Not in it's stones or in it's buildings, but it's heart.

Vesta laid back and tried not to think about everyone who had gone. Who'd joined Voldemort, or died in Azkaban, or ben attacked by Aurors. She rested on her bed and let the real world drift.

****

Draco Malfoy had ordered everyone to keep away from his quarters. Anyone who made the slightest bit of noise was immediately silenced.

"She's been so quiet. Draco, she needs help," Crabbe tried to reason with him.

"Not Hagrid."

"Who else?" Goyle asked.

"That stupid blubbering git?" Draco demanded. "He let a hippogriff bite me. Why would he help my raven?"

"He's a sap. Kind of..."

"He could eat you. He's scary," one of the First years whimpered. "He's the size of a giant."

"He is a giant."

"You can't let a giant in here."

"Will you babies shut up?" Blaise cut them off. "For once, Malfoy, shut up so I can pull up my GPA."

"I won't let him touch my raven. She's a Morrigan. He'd just upset her."

"Come on. He knows about birds," Pansy said. "He helped me with my sick owl."

"You don't give a fig about that owl." Draco gritted his teeth. "You didn't even name it. You just call it Owl."

"Well, I didn't have to buy a new one," Pansy said. "How can you be such a ponce about a bird?"

"Len is a second familiar. She chose to be by my side for the rest of her life. I didn't even need to buy her."

"Well, the giant is coming."

The little first year began to cry and ran under the bed.

"I don't like this idea," Draco said petulantly.

"She's going to get worse. She's making funny noises."

Draco petted his gorgeous Len, trying to sooth her.

Len was a massive raven, closer to the size of an eagle. She was a glistening black creature with a frightening silhouette. She must have been the single most beautiful raven in the shop where Draco had found her. Her vocabulary was not quite as extensive as Professor Snape's raven's, but she was brilliant and regal. The perfect companion for a Malfoy. Draco could recognize her greatness. It was no wonder that Great Ravens were the companions of the mighty. She was a nearly perfect familiar and Draco would never tolerate any other familiar after her. She was also brave and discreet. All the qualities he hoped to cultivate in his own personality. He could watch her for hours, feeling their bond.

But of late Len hadn't been hunting at night and was neglecting to preen herself, sitting like a chick inside her cage. Len was never in her cage unless she was hiding from pushy obnoxious owls. She was very good at finding an alibi. She was usually sneaky and a whiz at mischief making. She was definitely in the right house. She was a Slytherin Raven.

Hagrid the half giant looked around the tiny Slytherin room.

"Draco. You've put your raven in her cage," Hagrid said. "Oh, is she okay?"

Draco gritted his teeth. He didn't want Hagrid down there in the first place. Stupid flunkies. Stupid Parkenson, Stupid stupid...

"Draco's raven looks sick," Pansy volunteered. "She's not perching and she hasn't gone hunting. She just sits at the bottom of her cage."

"Careful," Draco said helplessly as the giant picked her up. She looked like a song bird in his great hands.

"Oh, there we go." Hagrid tickled her craw.

"Got anything stuck in there? Baby. She's got to take a bath," Hagrid said. "Len is a great name fer a raven. Let me guess, Magdalen?"

"That's what I told Father. It's really after the song wizard, John Lenyn. Father would have caught on if I'd called her Rocky Raccoon."

Hagrid smiled. "John Lennon was a good man. I met those Beetlies. Fine band. They sang at the 62 graduation party. Such nice chaps."

Hagrid knew for a fact that three of them were muggles. Ringo, George, and Paul had been absolutely astonished at the existence of Hogwarts. That was a proud day, when John Lennon sang on the Wizard Wireless. Muggles and Wizards working together. It was a shame what had happened to the great Song Wizard. When the Beatles arrived, they found that a whole untapped demographic of English witches wanted to tear off their clothes in front of them. Even the teachers like Mrs. Trunchet and Miss Figg had tried to mount the stage. Mrs. Poppins had heart Palpitations. Good thing that Dumbledore had charmed it with a levitation charm. That was the last Muggle Rock Band to ever play at Hogwarts.

Hagrid laid his hands on Len's chest.

"You know 'Imagine?'"

"I hate that one," Draco said flatly.

Hagrid found what he was searching for. He stroked the top of Lenyn's head.

"You know what's wrong? I know it a mile a way. But I'm going to need a book or two. If this is what I think it is..."

"What, you don't know?" Draco sneered. "I thought you were the expert."

"Draco, Morrigan Ravens are very rare. And their mating habits are delicate."

"You don't know anything. Leave her alone." Draco tried to grab his raven.

Hagrid sighed patiently

"Now, Draco. Calm yerself. It won't help her."

"She was poisoned. She's sick, she's going to die..."

"Well, she has a case of egg bind."

"What? What is that?"

"As far as I can tell she's about to clutch. She's going to be a mummy."

"WHAT!"

Goyle actually had to catch Draco to keep him from fainting on the floor.

"She's not!" Draco shrieked.

"Well, you said that she roams for food. During Winter they have a mating season."

"But there aren't any other ravens about..."

"Well, yeah. There is someone. I'll go call Snape."

Snape came down, looking less than pleased.

"I heard Draco fainted. What, might I ask, are you doing here, Hagrid?"

"Well, there's one less thing I need to do." Hagrid sat back down.

"Is this about Len?" Snape asked. ''She smells ill."

"Well, not ill, exactly."

"Professor Snape, would you be so kind as to call yer familiar?"

"What on Earth for?"

Hagrid stood up, "I'm the Assistant to the County Familiar Warden, if you don't forget. You better go get Caius down here. I have some news."

"No need."

Snape whistled with his tongue. The raven call. Draco had not mastered it. The potionsmaster held up his left arm.

"Sev-ah-rus? Call." The raven flapped and tried to land on his shoulder again, so he could help preen his master and eat his hair. Snape put him on his wrist. The raven hadn't been called in ten years since he and Snape was training in his tiny muggle apartment. Caius was so frustrated with Severus for taking so long to figure out how to do it. But he was a patient bird. It must be something serious. Snape never called him

"Well, they want you here?" Snape said

Caius scanned the room from the security of Snape's wrist. Caius was such a tiny raven. He was barely the size of a crow. He had ratty, purplish black feathers and was at least 20 years old. He over preened and looked a travesty next to the sleek, black Len. He stared watchfully at his audience.

"Wow, that ratty little crow? But he's tiny," Crabbe said.

"Oy, he's a playah isn't he?" Goyle said.

"What are you talking about, Mr. Goyle?" Snape demanded.

"Len Len," Caius smelled Len immediately.

"It looks like Caius is a Daddy. You little Casanova," Hagrid said.

Snape started, "Excuse me?"

"Yes, I'll bet young Len will clutch tomorrow if not sooner. I recognize a good case of Egg bind anywhere."

"Did you hear that, Caius?" Snape shouted to his raven. Perhaps a smirk that was working into an honest smile. "You have some explaining to do."

He held Caius closer.

"Caius?" He asked, strangely. It was as if he understood.

"Well, go on, Caius. Go and see her." Hagrid said

"Len Len?" He cawed cautiously hopping towards her.

"Caius," Len said softly. "Egg."

Caius looked in closely. His raven friend didn't look well.

"He's a bird. He doesn't understand."

"Egg?" Caius asked, trying to smell her closer.
Len groaned.

"Egg. Egg!" Caius shrieked. He fell off his feet and flapped around, with his hackles and feathers standing on end. The raven hopped and paced.

"I think that surprised him." Hagrid pat Draco on the shoulder.

Caius rolled around and flew out of the room.

"I think he's taking a smoke."

Draco stood up. He almost glared at his head of house. If he hadn't been so short, Snape might have been intimidated.

"You keep your randy brute of a raven away from my Len. How dare he!"

"Wow, His raven is a playah," Goyle repeated.

"Well, how'd that little scrawny ugly thing get with such a pretty birdie?" Pansy said. "She must've been desperate."

"She's not. Caius probably brutalized her, when I couldn't protect her."

"One important question, how?" Snape pointed at his bird. "She exceeds him in bulk by at least a stone."

Draco slammed the cage door shut. "Caius isn't allowed near her."

"Well, fine, you tell him that."

Caius flew back in the room.

"Len. Raaaaat! Len."

"Look, they are brooding. I suppose it's hard to deny it now." Snape clapped Draco on the other shoulder.

Caius dropped some scrap of rotten animal in front of Len. It emitted a stinking cloud of fragrance and flies. The Slytherins covered their noses.

"What is that?" Pansy whimpered.

"It's either a mouse with only a little fur or a rotten frog with mold on," Hagrid said.
The Slytherins covered their eyes.

"Len isn't eating that." Draco shook his finger.

Len ignored him and picked at the dead animal.

"He must have been saving that for a special occasion." Snape covered his mouth.

Draco began growling.

"Now now, Draco." Hagrid tried to calm the boy down. "Let the couple alone. She needs someone to help her groom and nest. An' Caius is the only raven..."

"That silly, grungy crow? No way."

"It's nature. It isn't as if Caius were going to get down on one knee and propose marriage or something," Snape said. "I don't think ravens do that."

"He's just an ugly old bird."

"Caius. Do you hear that? He's insulting your parentage. Caius is a pureblood Morrigan."

"He's the smartest Morrigan raven I ever met, hands down. Len's baby's will be very smart too," Hagrid said.

"He's a true Great Raven. I'm surprised I can keep him," Snape said. "He has run away before."

"He should have stayed away," Draco muttered. "He couldn't be the same kind of bird as Len."

Snape coughed. "His Parents were Mnemose and Hunin II. Mnemose, daughter of Logos and Althea, and Hunin II, son of Hunin, son of Corvus the Night Black. His broodmate was Hannibal the Stained. He comes from the Bloodline of Rowena Ravenclaw's great familiar, Morrigan, who was said to be her lover ensorcelled to be by her side forever."

Caius would have rolled his eyes if he were human. "Caius Raven. Caius Morrigan Snape." He was a bashful creature, and all the names of his dead ancestors couldn't help but humble him.

"His papers go back as far as any Malfoy's," Snape said sharply. "Farther."

The Slytherins were impressed. Snape knew the bird's lineage by heart. Maybe it showed that he was even proud of his raven, in an odd way. They recognized the names of the famous familiars. Corvus had been the familiar of Dark Grindelwald himself, the raven who perished dashing himself on the rocks when Albus Dumbledore killed his master. Hannibal the Stained had been the oldest living Raven in England. His legend was sealed when he was torn apart by the Ministry owls on the night before Halloween 1981, when Voldemort died and Harry Potter lived. His death was such a powerful omen that he got his picture in the paper. Some Death Eaters hadn't got a spread in the Daily Prophet. If an augur had lived they could have foretold that the Dark Lord would fall, leaving a bloody wake.

"Who were Len's parents?"

"Her mother was Moira and her father.... Is unknown. He was probably a wild raven."

Hagrid nodded. "So she's halfblood. That's a miracle, that is, that she could be a Morrigan. Such a pretty thing too."

Draco glared straight at the giant. "My familiar is not a half-blood."

"She is Morrigan. Caius seems to think so," Snape concurred.

"Lennyn Morrigan Malfoy," Caius nodded.

"Don't you realize, Draco. If your Len has Morrigan chicks that will be the first in 6 years. Morrigan Blood does not pass easy. If only we had an augur alive today. I'll bet it would be good news anyway. This is the best news all semester." Hagrid smiled.

"How is that? Your raven is going to be famous. Your little chicks might make front page news." Hagrid smiled broadly. "It will be in Magical Creatures Quarterly, if they're the real deal."

"No fooling?"

"I think she'd like that. Getting her picture taken," Snape said, knowing how Draco loved the attention.

Snape cleared his throat, "I'll be perfectly willing to help you with the hatching and raising of the chicks, when I return from the Ministry. Len is quite young for a mother and Caius has little experience as a father. He can barely feed himself."

"If sum'un didn't keep feedin' him potion ingredients," Hagrid said mildly, not looking at anyone in particular, "maybe he'd learn." Snape gave Hagrid a half power sneer with only one of his eyes.

"Well I certainly don't have time to deal with this now. I am on my way elsewhere.

"You're going away now? My raven..." Draco protested.

"This is serious business," Snape cut him off. "I have been summoned by the Ministry to help in an investigation on very serious matters of State."

"But what about the ravens?"

Snape looked at the disappointed Draco, and a short plan formed in his head.

"Draco, I have favor to ask."

"What is it?" Draco tried not to shout at his teacher again. He didn't need any points taken away.

"I want you to tell your father to owl me at the Ministry. Caius always tries to avoid your house. Your father's eagle owl frightens him, and he must help Len take care of her nest."

"Really?" Draco might want enact vengeance for his disgraced raven.

"No ideas, Mr. Malfoy. The last thing your familiar needs is to fight off any owls who find out that she has eggs in her nest. Owls are vicious raven killers. Morrigans are so rare because they rarely survive chickhood."

"Len's not afraid of any owls," Draco said.

"She's not a one pound chick. We must keep close guard. You know how Len gets. Owls can be just as cruel as a raven."

One fateful night Len had found an owl's nest and thrown the eggs out of the tree. Snape and Hagrid had stayed up all night to prevent Professor Vector from calling the Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. The Familiar Warden had been very hard to convince. He could not believe a 16-year-old could be responsible enough to control a Morrigan Raven like Len. Snape had received Caius at that age, but Caius was a different story. After that incident with the poison when Snape was in school, nobody had been about to make him leave.

"Give this letter to your father. You can owl, but nowhere near Hogwarts grounds. Or go into Hogsmeade. We don't want to risk the eggs."

"Well. I might as well tell father what's happened this week." Draco sighed. "It's only Tuesday."

"Thank you very, Mr. Malfoy."

Snape could take it for granted that the letter would be opened with curious finger. Why bother to seal it? It was nothing that wasn't above board, before you know it Creon the owl would be attending him. It's a good thing owls told no tales. Caius would have been bad choice as a courier.

He mentioned Caius's wonderful news. It would seem the point of the letter to any casual observer. In the last line he said: "For further notice, I will be working at the ministry for the next week."

****

It was in the hall late in the morning before Harry saw Remus.

"You're back." Harry gave Remus a hug. "How are you?"

"I did not have a good sleep last night." Remus grinned ironically. "I ran into someone I'd rather forget."

"Oh. Well, did you have a good time at the Grieves?" Harry smiled

"Right. Yeah"

"Good. You should have more friends." Harry rubbed his arm.

"I can't wait till next week." Remus sighed.

"Next week?" Harry raised his eyebrow.

"Yes."

"You must have had fun." Harry said awkwardly.

Remus only smirked and laughed to himself.

"Fred and George got the idea that you were fooling around with some girl or something."

Remus turned white. "What?"

"Oh, I mean..." Was it true? Could it be that he was keeping a secret?
"Oh, no one. Nobody..." Remus shook his head. Remus began scratching the back of his head.

"Excuse me?" Harry asked, "I didn't ask if you were meeting anybody." Harry's voice had become sharp.

Remus's eyes darted around."I'm not going to see anyone."

Harry's gaze tightened "I don't believe you."

"I'm going to be-"

Harry pointed between his eyes "Look me in the eyes and tell me what you were doing."

"Okay. It's like this." Remus sighed then continued. "The Grieves' Gardener, Alejandro, just came from Argentina. He needs some English lessons. So I thought I could go there and keep teaching him. As a favor."

"Well. That's awful nice." Harry felt rather ashamed that he'd thought anything bad. It was just Remus being nice. "I'm sure he'll be speaking perfect English in no time."

"Now I'm off to class. See you in DaDA today."

"Okay. I'm sorry I got so sharp," Harry said. "I just get worried.

"No Problem Harry."

Harry began to beam as Ron and Neville were walking around to meet him. He had just been imagining things. Remus walked into the room.

"Hello, Professor Lupin!" Neville said quietly.

"Is Lupin back from his trip?" Ron asked. "He have any fun in Whereship."

"He's even going back next week," Harry said. "The gardener doesn't speak English, and he's teaching him."

"So what does that mean?"

"Well, that proves it. That means that Remus doesn't have a girlfriend. He's teaching English."

"How do you figure?"

"Well, it's just..."

"Maybe he's... lying?" Neville stammered.

"You are guys are so suspicious," Harry grumbled. "Remus does not have a girlfriend."

"We're not," Ron protested.

But the whole debate was interrupted by a crash of a bookshelf. The three boys ran toward the source. It was coming out of McGonagall's office

Soon there came unmistakable sound of an argument. Harry hushed them.

"I don't see where this is getting you, Black!" The three boys heard their head of house shout.

They hid around the door of her office.

"You aren't being square with me, McGonagall. I need to know who is going to be honest."

"I haven't done anything. I think you're barking up the wrong tree."

The boys could make out the voices. Harry got a look inside of the room and saw Auror Black and Professor McGonagall. Auror Black was tearing through the drawers.

"I haven't found anything yet." Auror Black said, ignoring her.

"Auror Black. I think that we should wait and see. It's unbelievable. Why would one of us catch Sirius Black?"

"Waiting is a luxury. It also gives our enemy the chance to strike, to build power. Why don't you just let me take Vesta in? Why do you think we need to wait? Do you think that I can't see that she's very suspicious? She's the first person I should take in, I know, but I can trust her."

"And you can't trust me? Rifling through my office like a monsoon." Minerva said.

"Why do you object so? Is there something to find?"

"Auror Black." Minerva pressed her lips. "You don't know. We can't do this. Soon the accusations will get out of hand."

"There is a conspiracy in place, McGonagall. A conspiracy that will lead straight to Voldemort himself. It begins at this school."

"Right under Dumbledore's nose?" Minerva said. "Dumbledore would never allow it. Voldemort can't touch us. As long as Albus Dumbledore is at Hogwarts it's the safest place."

"Do you think that it's so simple?" Auror Black shook her head. "Where could a nosey, timid boy like Donnie McGonagall get killed? In Swizterland of all places. Why did he have to die? He knew something. Something deadly." Auror Black's voice went quiet.

"What are you talking about? He was barely out of Hogwarts. He was just a boy." Minerva sounded shocked.

"What could Donnie McGonagall have known? And where else could he have learned it except at his father's knee?"

"Father's-"

Auror Black cut her off. "The McGonagalls are from old stock, you had vast fortunes in those days. One of the oldest wizard lines in Europe, straight to Taleisin of the Shining Brow. Your father worked with Voldemort and that awful Caligula Snape. It occurs to me that everyone your family knew became Death Eaters. After Voldemort was gone, your fortune and fate were wiped out."

"Yes. The war was bad for us. We had to lose a lot in order to defeat him," Minerva said.

Polaris continued. "Why didn't the McGonagalls join Voldemort? There must have been a reason. Your family lost everything when Voldemort was defeated."

"No." Minerva began clenching her jaw. "That is reverse prejudice. We might have had power and money. But one thing you cannot buy back is pride. I was glad when my father liquidated our great fortune for the Cause. We were proud. Money is nothing if you have to pay for it with your soul."

"But someone is a traitor. Maybe he didn't learn it from your father. Maybe from his big sisters?"

"You be quiet." Minerva's glared at her. "There is no traitor in my family. Not even one of the Slytherins. Bambi turned in a Death Eater at Hogwarts, and she's not the most morally upright of us. We all hate Death Eaters."

"What if this traitor, whoever she is, killed her own brother even then, in those early days? When nothing was happening? She killed him then. How could you live with it?"

"No. We couldn't do that. He was just in the wrong place. We all hated the Death Eaters." The teacher shook her head.

"Think about it. A traitor in your house. Do you remember that year, 1965?"

Minerva's eyes flashed. "Not really. I wasn't myself. I spent most of the year chasing mice and licking my fur."

"Let me remind you. You may have been trapped in cat form. But the whole world wasn't. Oh, 1965 was a year to remember. Wouldn't it explain why that vampire was hired to coach your sister for the Pythian games? You and your sisters were almost killed. Then your mother dies without so much as a fuss. The head of the oldest witch clan in Scotland. Then, after that, your little 'jaunt.' There were many things happening in those years, and it all keeps pointing towards your house. Why is that?"

"We were on the side of Light in a time of war. My sister was your partner in the Aurors." Minerva's voice had completely lost volume control. "We did everything we could to fight Voldemort, may his name be cursed."

Polaris turned away.

Harry looked cautiously around the edge of the door. Minerva's eyes were swishing about, kind of cat-like and mad. He had never heard her say that name. It made the whole pledge so heavy. He had never heard what Professor McGonagall had been through in the War. But it must have been awful. She had a little brother before the war. Had parents. Now only she and her sisters lived. Harry knew she was grown up, but no matter how old you were it had to be awful to lose your family. He wondered if that was why she was so grave and cranky.

Polaris straightened her own black cloak. "There is a traitor in your house. It makes sense."

"You're jumping to conclusions. 2+2 does not equal 5." Minerva caught her breath. "Polaris Black, you know how prejudice, rumor, and shame can tear a family apart. Even if no one has done anything, our name will be dragged through the mud. Your brother..." Harry could hear her trying to soften her voice.

"Don't talk about Sirius," Polaris snarled.

"Do you want my sister to end up like you and yours? Shunned, hated. Our name is good."

"But your good name is hiding a traitor. And I'll find her out."

Polaris stood.

Minerva grabbed onto her departing cloak. "You keep away from my family, Polaris. If you hurt any McGonagall... We've been through enough. We don't need Polaris Black to gnaw at our roots."

"I'll find your traitor. Then we'll see..."

"If you touch my sisters, I'll..."

"It is against the law to threaten an auror. Don't make any mistakes."

Minerva McGonagall stood up from behind the desk, glaring Polaris straight in the eye.

"Harry."

He felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Hagrid's.

"Oh Harry! Professor McGonagall! You'll never ever guess. In a trillion years!" The giant's mere presence practically cheered up the room.

Harry gasped, he was discovered.

Auror Black and McGonagall looked at the boy, then the half giant.

"What?"

Hagrid smiled. "It's Baby Ravens. Draco's raven and Caius, that Snape's raven, ma'am," Hagrid cleared up. "She's clutching. Len is going to have a baby. This might make the papers. This is so exciting. I just have to tell everyone."

"Din't ya hear boys?" Hagrid said to the boys snooping behind the door.

Harry and Ron slapped their foreheads.

"Harry Potter. What are you doing here snooping?"

"Auror Black..." Hagrid waved at the woman timidly, wanting to get away before she yelled at him too. Hagrid looked sheepishly at Auror Black. He might be a little oblivious, but even he could tell that Auror Black and Minerva were fighting about something.

Minerva stood up.

"I'd love too." Minerva smiled coldly at Auror Black. "Let's get out of here."

"If yer'll excuse us, Auror Miss Black Ma'am. I have to go attend to this business."

Auror Black nodded.

Hagrid's voice trailed after Minerva

"Now, I can't promise you, Minerva, but how would you like to see Morrigan raven eggs?"

"I'll be watching you, McGonagall. Watch yourself. Care killed the cat."

***

Neville and Harry gulped. Harry was good at holding his breath.

By the time they got down to the common room, everyone but Hermione had begun to question him.

"If you know where all this is leading... It's just cruel and unnecessary." Harry grumbled

"I know her. She wouldn't-" Neville shook his head.

"Why she bothering McGonagall?" Harry asked. "That angry, mean, old vulture. I'm embarrassed to be related to her. Sort of related to her."

"I don't know,' Hermione said. "She's an Auror. It's an investigation. She doesn't seem nice. If there is a traitor you have to intimidate them. Show them who's boss."

"But it's Professor McGonagall. She's our head of House. She couldn't have done anything wrong. But Auror Black thinks different"

Hermione looked up from her book. "You mean Professor McGonagall is a suspect?"

The crowd began buzzing.

"How could she do anything?" Ron said. "She's just some boring old fussbudget."

"I can't believe it," Harry said.

"What is all this business about her little brother? And Miss Vesta." Neville asked.

"I don't know, Nev. I've never heard McGonagall talk on it."

The Weasley twins entered the Common room.

"What's going on?" Fred asked, "You're all huddled in here like Quirrel is back or your about to uncover the Chamber of Hufflepuff."

"Yeah tell us. Don't leave us out." George sat on Ron. Ron pushed him off the couch.

"It was terrible. You know Auror Black?"

"You mean that dark haired broad with the blue eyes? Makes Inspector Javert look like Inspector Gadget." George said.

Fred shuddered. "Just keep away from that. There is nothing scarier than a woman who thinks she's doing the right thing."

"You hear what she did to that Death Eater last year? I think she punched him to death."

"I'm so glad Percy isn't an Auror."

Harry shook his head. "She was questioning Professor McGonagall. She says that McGonagall is a traitor."

"What? McGonagall a traitor?"

"Well, she was leaning into McGonagall for information, putting the arm on her."

"Getting the pigeon to sing?" Fred winked.

"Getting the canary to croak," George chimed

"She was threatening her," Harry cut them off. "Then she said that the McGonagalls were traitors in the war."

"To what exactly? They're just wizards like us. That would be like saying Uncle Gary's a traitor cause he owns a restaurant."

"It's stupid," Harry said. "I don't know. She's looney or something. She'd do anything to find Sirius Black. I'd bet she'd even arrest Professor McGonagall."

"Yeah, which is why you let that lady do her job. She'll realize soon enough Professor McGonagall is a good egg and back off," George told him.

"Yeah, she'll get so bored to tears watching our Head of House, she'll go find the real traitor. She'll probably feel stupid."

"Professor McGonagall is about as dangerous to national security as a piece of toast."

"I don't know. We don't know anything about her, McGonagall. Just that she's in charge of Gryffindor. She could have a past as black as pitch. She could have been the girlfriend of some Dark wizard? Or cast forbidden spells or... What if she was a Lady Death Eater or something?" Neville said. "Like Madame Lestrange."

"Lady Death Eater?" Ron shook his head. "You've gone daft, Neville."

"Yeah, the Board of Governors would never let a Death Eater teach here."

Neville shut his mouth. "I'm just saying we can't tell. You can't ever tell about a person. I didn't mean that McGonagall was bad, now, but people change."

Harry stopped that line of reasoning. He couldn't see Minerva McGonagall as anything but a bastion of virtue and strength. She was always kind, in her way. He didn't want to think about the past. And he knew full well that Dumbledore had hired another unlikely Death Eater to teach here at Hogwarts.

"Still, her sisters are all crazy. Even the pretty one," Harry said.

"They're all pretty," Lee Jordan said.

"You keep away from them, Jordan," George advised. "McGonagall women suck you up and spit you out. That's why they only have women in the family."

"I'll bet Vesta McGonagall is the same. They said that she's Mata Hari."

"Who?"

"She uses her feminine wiles to steal state secrets," Hermione said. "La femme fatale."

"I wouldn't trust her," Fred said.

"You would too," George said. "If she came up to you and offered you a drink you'd snap up on both feet."

"Yeah, good thing Minerva McGonagall isn't like that. She must be 100."

"She's not that old."

Neville muttered, "If a chap like Sirius Black can become a Traitor, how can you trust anyone..." then said nothing as Lee Jordan and the twins talked about how evil and slut-some Bambi was. And the old legend that Vesta McGonagall only had one eye.

Ron lowered his head and whispered to Harry "I'm wondering where Sirius is, if we can't find him."

As if on cue, Hedwig entered the room and shoved Pig off the perch. The little screech owl pulled himself up. Harry put her on his wrist.

"My precious little baby." Harry always had a blind spot for his snowy owl. She could bring him a dead mouse and he would only coo at her. Tied to her leg was a small letter.

"It's Sirius's letter."

"Why has she come back with it?"

"I don't know. Couldn't you find him?"

Hedwig fidgeted. Pig knew better than to cross a snowy owl in a bad mood.

"Well if an owl can't find him... Hey, maybe none of those Wacky McGonagall's can get to him."

"Yeah, he's safe from them."

Hedwig curled in on herself.

"Don't worry, Hed... This is almost better. Really. If they can't find him, no one can." Harry said. "We'll just cheer up."

"Hey, why is Hedwig on the rag?" Fred asked. "She bitch slapped Pig off the perch."

"Your owl is so hard core," George said admiringly.

"She's just tired," Harry said. "We all are."

"I'm pooped." Fred yawned.

"What have you two been up to all day?"

"Well, we've began our Senior Project." Fred smiled.

"Senior Project?" Hermione asked. "Some independent study or paper?"

"No, but it's our service to the school."

They held up a manilla folder that said: "Hogwarts gets Laid."

"What is that?"

"Well, it started with Professor Lupin."

"He's endorsing this project?" Hermione asked dubiously. "Is it Dark Arts?"

"He doesn't know."

"We were thinking. Why not use our powers to help the teachers at Hogwarts? We've given them enough problems, why not end it on a conciliatory note?" George explained.

"Bury the hatchet, thank them all," Fred chimed in.

"You're going to stop pranking everyone and start studying hard?" Harry asked.

"Bite your tongue, Mr. Potter," Fred said as he wagged his finger.

"We're paying them back," George said.

"We are going to see they get laid," Fred clapped his hands together dramatically.

"Pardon?" Hermione said.

"We intend to match up every teacher at Hogwarts with an appropriate sweetheart," Fred continued.

"See, look at how happy Lupin is now. Look how much he's improved. Less homework over the weekends. Shorter classes. And-"

"What?"

"Yeah. See, everyone. We're going to pair up the teachers."

"With who?" Ron asked. It was unthinkable. Teachers didn't have sex lives. Everyone knew that.

"I don't know. People in town, our friends, other teachers. It will work out wonderfully."

"Rubeus Hagrid?" Ron challenged.

"Yep. Getting Madame Maxime to come down here from Paris will be hard."

"Phinneas Flitwick?" Hermione asked, in a shrill Flitwick-like accent.

"Got a girl in mind. Half Leperachaun, works at the Bookstore. Lucky devil."

"Professor Binns?" Neville asked.

"Heard the Grey Lady and the Bloody Baron are on the outs. He won't commit."

"Professor Snape." Harry crossed his arms triumphantly.

The twins winced.

Fred shook his head. "George. Can't we just... Snape's so... uggh."

"There was that time when we almost killed his familiar."

"We'll probably have to go to St. Mungo's ward for the Insane. I'm sure some twisted freak might think he's attractive."

"You are going to find Professor Snape a girl?" Neville looked appalled.

"This is why this is our Senior project. There won't be any monkeying around until it happens. No Canary Creams, no Ton Tongue Toffees. No extraneous explosions."

"Extraneous explosions," George sighed.

"Well, maybe we've got to finish our store of dung bombs," Fred said. "But we are committed to this and we won't rest till Hogwarts gets laid."

****

The next day, they had an early morning potions lab. As they walked into the class no one was their. They slurged to their seats. But soo the minutes ticked by uncomfortably.

"Snape is never sick," Hermione said nervously. "He even came to class when he had laryngitis. His throat was so sore he couldn't even insult us."

"Yeah," Ron snorted. "He wrote the insults on the board and pointed."

"Only Snape can be snarky with a pointed wand." Harry said.

Dumbledore smiled as he entered the room.

"Now, ladies and gentleman, Professor Snape is ill today and requires a replacement."

The front row of Hufflepuffs began chattering gleefully.

"I want to introduce you to your substitute. She is an Alumna of Hogwarts, Girl's Honor Society for Slytherin, and Miss Minerva McGonagall's sister, for those of you in Gryffindor. She is a potions master from Malastacea's"

"Mistress..." she corrected from the door. "Potions Mistress."

"Miss Bambi McGonagall."

Dumbledore smiled and sat down.

The room sat silent. A garish red and red-haired woman approached the podium, in a low cut robe that looked like an open shirt. The timpani drum picked up as she walked across the room. They all chuckled. She blinked. The boys immediately looked at her cleavage as though it were a Pavlovian reaction. The gold hoop earrings jangled against her face. Her green eyes and shining green eye shadow made Harry nauseous. Her eyes were so green. He felt really sick in his stomach. Ron glared and frowned at her, hoping she could read his mind.

"I will leave you two alone."

"Snape wishes you to make a Sleeping potion in his absence. When he returns at the end of the week it will be finished. I'll be perfectly happy to help anyone who has any trouble. I'll be here to be consulted at this time everyday from 1 to 2, if you wish to receive my assistance. I have very little classroom experience and less patience. Potions aren't for everyone, I understand."

The class sat silently.

"That's all. You can go."

"No class." Ron snapped his fingers. "I thought we'd be trapped with that tart all afternoon."

"Ron, we'll still have to make the potion," Harry reminded him.

"No class? She can't do that," Hermione said.

"I feel the alternate project I have will in fact prove sufficiently intellectually stimulating and Dumbledore agrees. As well as teaching Potions lab I will be creating a potion in this very lab. Thanks to the resources of Hogwarts School."

"For those seeking a little extra challenge," Miss McGonagall continued, "I am seeking assistance in the creation of a new glamour potion. Practical Potions work for real world applications. I will ask some of you and your older classmates to assist me. 3 or 4 students from each house, unless circumstances change."

Hermione practically licked her lips. "Extra credit."

"Now you all can start working. Don't try the sleep potions on yourself. When it is done, you will test it and then receive your grade."

Ron was busting to leave as soon as he could. Harry had the tact to write down the ingredients before leaving.

Harry wiped his brow "I'm going to the bathroom. It was hot down there. I'm getting..." Harry walked quickly to the bathroom. Well, actually he ran.

"Don't fall in."

Hermione, Ginny and Ron waited outside for Harry, who was making awful noises. He sounded as if he was really sick all of a sudden.

"An extra credit potions project. I thought I would die before I saw this day."

"You're sure to be asked, Hermione."

"She won't just pick on me like Snape, just because I'm in Gryffindor. I can tell Miss Bambi appreciates talent," Hermione said.

"Snape picks on everyone," Ginny said.

"Not Draco." Harry said from the depths of the echoing room. "Tell me when Draco ever irritated him. He likes Draco."

Bambi McGonagall approached them.

Ron stood in front of the bathroom.

"What is wrong?"

"Harry is sick, Miss Bambi."

"Yeah," Ron said belligerently. "And I don't think he needs any help from you."

"Miss Weasley, Miss Granger. I hope to see you this afternoon. I've heard a lot of good things about you, Ginny Weasley. I hope you can bury the hatchet and come to help us."

Ginny's eyes popped open. "Me?"

"Oh yes, excellent marks. I've seen your lab work, very focused. I bet you're very good at concentrating. It's so hard to find the appropriate amount of focus."

"Wow. You want me?"

"But just cause your brother was sweet on me, don't expect this to be easy. I've dated a lot of older brothers. If that were the case, I'd have to fill the class three times over. But I don't mean to brag."

"Well I can't wait till tomorrow."

"Of course, you." Bambi gave Hermione a dirty look. "You know enough. I bet you spend a lot of time reading."

"Yes well. See you tomorrow. Miss McGonagall." Hermione said.

Bambi coughed, "Call me Bambi please. There are five of us."

Hermione melted in embarrassment.

"Well it will be a haul." Bambi said. "I had to be quite a bit of coaxing with Professor Vector and Professor Shakespear to have double potions lab every day and an evening session. Two midnight sessions. It couldn't take more than two weeks."

"Muggles Studies," Ginny said.

"Arithmancy is never canceled," Hermione said.

At lunch Ginny was talking to Hermione about the amazing offer.

"I'd love to do this. But I'm not pulling the best marks in Muggle Studies."

Ron knocked Ginny on the head. "Ginny, you can't want to work with her..."

"She thinks I'm special."

"If you pull home another D in Muggle Studies, Mum is going to bust a fit."

"Well, I live in the Muggle world. It's not too hard to figure it out," Harry said.

"Harry, you would help me?" Ginny couldn't imagine it. Harry Potter would help her? She'd die if he would. Just die.

"I'd love to help. I know a bit about it. And so does Hermione."

"Don't volunteer me," Hermione snorted at him. "Of course, Ginny, I'll help. It is the price of excellence."

"I want to be excellent at something." Ginny said.

"It's time you all got over this stupid feud with Miss Bambi. I mean, sure she's gross and those stupid earrings... But feuds are dumb," Harry said.

Meanwhile on the way to Slytherin dorms:

"By Divine Intervention. Pha."

Draco rolled up his Muggle studies paper. "I hate this stuff. If I have to read one more book about Television, my head's going to explode."

"TV is an important staple and aspect of Muggle life," Crabbe recited from his book. He could memorize the longest, most pointless sections.

"Television. It's a bloody box. Why would anyone care?" Draco slammed his head against the book. "If it's so bloody important than why don't wizards have TV's? It's a magic lantern. I don't need to waste time on it. Len has been on her eggs all afternoon. That ugly Caius is about, too."

"Where did they build their nest?"

"The old potions safety shower. The one that Longbottom blew out the pipes on. Len can drink without getting too far. She hates it. I can tell. She wants to be back with me." Draco frowned.

It was obvious that Draco missed spoiling his raven and fawning over it. Of course no one was dense enough to say that to his face.

"The eggs hatch faster if they are Morrigans. It's usually supposed to take a month. If they are Morrigans it should only take a week."

All at once they saw Miss Bambi coming out of a corridor. A Slytherin like them. Sure her clothes were... but she was one of them. Good Pureblood stock.

"Hello, Mr. Malfoy."

Draco smiled and his eyes wandered lower then her chin. "Hi, Miss."

"You're the boy with the ravenlings. Oh wow. A Morrigan. That is classy. It's so incredibly and distinctively Malfoy."

Pale people blush so easily.

She was close enough to look at his paper.

"Oh, Muggle Studies Midterm. I pulled an OWL in it." Bambi smiled. "Don't let it drive you crazy. It's not very important."

"My father makes me take it." Draco muttered.

"Well at least it gets you out of Arithmancy."

"I like Arithmancy," Draco said. "It helps me make decisions."

"So, Draco, may I call you that..."

"Yes."

"I was wondering, you are such an excellent student, and have such skill with potions. I want you to help me with my glamours."

"Really. Well I pride myself on being a good potions student. I enjoy Professor Snape's class."

Bambi laughed. "You're so cute. Yes, I'm sure you'll flourish. I'd be happen to impart my years of experience. Double potions from nine to one."

"You mean I can get out of Muggle Studies for two weeks to make love potions?"

"Then alternating evening sessions. Some late sessions. I have some ___."

"Yes and they require moonlight," Draco nodded. "Not necessarily a certain time. I mean it's not like Midnight has any more moonlight than 3am or anything."

"Still I'm very precise. I want to make sure."

"We might as well do it at midnight. Otherwise we should just used bottled moonlight." Draco said.

"Exactly. You know your stuff." Bambi smiled. "Besides what's that old saying? Sell the Label first. Brewed at Midnight makes it sound better. If I wrote brewed at 13:27, what would that sell?"

"Wow, I never thought of it like that."

"We'll be making our own ingredients. Snape has a large store of hand dried herbs I'm dying to get into."

"Well, I'll be there with bells on."

"Oh, Darling Draco. You're so preciously sweet."

"You know I really don't miss Snape." Draco said, looking at the shape of Bambi's departing back.

"Your Dad is going to get boiling," Crabbe commented.

"I can't handle that class anymore. Professor Shakespear hates me. I could do perfectly well without Muggle Studies. I'm up there with Blaise and she has no life. All she does is homework. She's like a Slytherin Granger."

"But, Draco."

"I'm out of this class. I don't care about TV's and Compeetors and Eclecticity Combustion Engines and I could care less how they clean toilets or about Supply Side Economics and Cartoons... It hurts my head thinking about it."

****

The next day Draco Malfoy arrived on time in the laboratory at 9.

Draco stood at his worktable, getting out a mortar and pestle and all sorts of things.

Ginny Weasely waved at him. Hermione was straightening her exacto razor blades.

Ginny grumbled. "My mom can't believe this. She thinks that I'm just doing it to make explosions and gag things."

"What kind of extra credit will we get?" Hermione asked.

Draco clunked down his special potions books.

"Best present all year," he smirked. "I get to miss Muggle Studies for two weeks. Course, I have to stand next to your big freckly shiny face."

Ginny frowned. Hermione looked at his Muggle Studies book.

"Yes. I hope it doesn't get too confusing for you all," Hermione said. "Eclecticy can get sooooooo complex."

"No, we're not going to talk about Stupid Muggle Studies. I just don't get what Dad sees in it," Ginny said. "I should have just taken Arithmancy."

"4th year Muggles Studies is nowhere near as hard as 5th year muggle studies. You're still talking about the easy stuff like sundries and day to day life. That doesn't count. You don't get into the mindless stuff until fifth year. Politics, technology, muggle medicine. Literature is okay. But who cares about the effects of the printing press on the Modern Muggle world.? Wizards had self writing quills and perfect memory charms 400 years before the printing press."

"I know. And what is the deal with muggles and Television? We had the magic lantern. Isn't it just one of those?" Ginny said.

"You too?" Draco shook his head. "Bothersome creatures, muggles."

"Well, Hermione offered to help me. She took the course and she lives with Muggles."

"Well, I suppose you'd be a shoe in for the course, then. I wish I had some smarmy, know-all mudblood..."

"Mr. Malfoy." A voice raised up, a feminine voice. "Must you be so vulgar as to use those terms in the presence of a teacher." Miss Bambi glared at him.

Draco looked around shyly.

"Where did you learn that word?"

"Just picked it up."

"Honestly." Bambi's drum music stamped off hastily. The music changed as she paced to that of delicate violins.

"Now, please pay attention. This is no draught, no mere soup of wild flowers, no black innards of dark creatures. We seek to bottle destiny itself. This is real potions work. There will be those who won't understand. There will be those who leave us. But what we make here will be glorious."

Bambi got a look on her face similar to the gleam Professor Snape's eyes sometimes took on during a difficult demonstration. The violins became stronger.

"Through this quiet and simple labour, our focus shall change fate itself. In absolute control. With absolute precision. We are bottling the very passions and desire of the human heart."

"Bottle fame, brew glory. Putting a stopper in Death ...bladiblahblah," Hermione muttered under her breath. The mournful and tedious speech Snape always gave, extolling the virtues of Potion making. It took all kinds to run the world.

She crossed her hands.

"Before we begin, I must ask who among you has their bezoar. Or poison charm. I must make sure they are strong enough to protect you from the ingredients."

"Bezoar?" someone muttered. "She actually expects us to keep one of those nasty goat hairball things?"

"Well, Bezoars aren't always found in goats," Bambi said. "They are usually stones or minerals imbued with magic powers. To protect you."

Draco smirked at Hermione and pulled out a small bag on a string. "It's a fetish."

A fetish! Ginny gasped. Those were the best protection at Potions. Of course Draco would have one. With all his money, he probably had twelve.

Bambi smelled it. "Garlic, silver hairs--are they Veela?--cherry bark, raven feathers.... Such a powerful fetish. So carefully made. I'd hate to waste it."

Draco smiled, a real smile. He looked down, almost wistfully. Ginny would give anything for her own fetish.

Ginny gulped. She lifted the boulder onto the table with a snap. It was a bezoar so large that Hermione needed to help her lift it onto the counter. It was yellow and sickly on the outside. Miss Bambi snorted at it.

"It's a magic amethyst," she said in a small voice.

"That was an amythest?" Bambi asked. "It's yellow."

"Hmmm."

Bambi touched it with her fingers.

"It's been used," she said, sounding rather disapproving.

"Well, It's my brothers' amethyst. My mum bought us a big one so we wouldn't have to get new ones."

Bambi sighed. "How is it supposed to work against poisons if it's this big?"

"It's still good in the middle," Ginny said. "That's what George said, anyway."

Miss Bambi rolled her eyes. "I'd crack off the outer layer." Bambi placed it aside. "It's not used up."

Ginny looked down, embarrassed. Amethyst was a common bezoar, boring, purple, and nasty. Draco smirked.

Hermione raised her hand.

"Miss Bambi. I don't have a bezoar."

"Miss Granger?"

"We don't need one for our potions class and I don't have one."

Bambi glared directly at her.

"This is serious potions work. This is no exercise. I cannot be held responsible for everything that could happen. Today you will work with Miss Weasely. You will acquire an appropriate bezoar by tomorrow morning. Or you can always leave."

"Weasely's bezoar is big enough for the entire class," Draco smirked.

Ginny gaped. The teacher in charge had scolded Hermione. Not even Trelawney had done that. They began to look at their assignments. Hermione was frozen with shock. This was going to be a lot more than any of them expected.

***

Eventually the whole morning had passed. It was lunchtime in the cafeteria. Remus arrived at his seat, to his delicious porkchop sandwich.

"Oh, there is Harry. I was a bit short with him this morning. Do you want a bite?"

"No thank you, Remus," Minerva declined politely. "Cats don't like pork."

"All cats?"

"Okay, I don't like pork."

Polaris Black was sitting in the cafeteria, by herself.

Remus tried to explain the image to himself. What was she doing at Hogwarts again? Sirius had been missing for weeks. There couldn't be any immediate danger. Not so soon. There was no evidence of anything happening.

What was she doing here if everything was well?

Polaris gave a nod to Remus.

"Hello, Remus."

"Hello, Polaris." Remus smiled a slightly stilted smile. "The Angels crowd coming back."

"We can't be the same without her here."

"Yes, Denise Longbottom... where... how... You look... It's been a long.

"I'm here for Ministry business and yes, it is serious. I wouldn't waste everyone's time just to catch up again."

"Oh. Well..."

She brushed him off slightly, smiling coldly and sloughing him off. "Keep an eye out, Lupin."

"Yes Ma'am, Auror Black."

Remus was relieved that she didn't want to talk.

Minerva had been listening the whole time.

"Remus, I always thought you were the cheerful one." Minerva wiped her mouth.

"Welcome to the slowly growing IHPB Society. I hate Polaris Black."

"You can't hate her. She's... devoted."

"You would think that she would be my worst problem. Alas! it is not to be. It appears that my sister is amoung us as well."

"I met with Bambi last night."

"Vesta, Diana."

"Aphrodite?"

"There is no Aphrodite... regardless of what Bambi has told you."

"Whenever those two get together, Polaris and Vesta, it's like mixing acid and bases. At least you and your crew had some sense of humor. All the girls did was get in trouble."

Remus watched Severus at the end of the table. When into the room sauntered (as she always had to, the woman had never just walked in her life...) Vesta. She passed by the teachers directly towards Severus.

"Look, she's joining Severus for lunch."

"What?" Minerva could have bent her spoon.

Remus grinned "I guess they've got some catching up to do."

From the distance human eyes could yield nothing, but the animagus eyes of a housecat could prove useful. Severus stirred his soup as Vesta draped herself over him, curling his hair. Instead of scalping her or threatening her life, he only snorted his great nostrils, gently coaxing her away, causing her to brush her chest against his back. Was Severus laughing?

"Well, she's back in the saddle," Lupin nodded. "I hope Severus can handle her."

Minerva scowled "Look at her, touching his face, curling her hair. Have you ever seen such a thing?"

"Um, no." Remus responded, shrugging. "Not with Severus."

"Oh, let me get your napkin so I can show you my sexy backside. Look at that."

Vesta opened his napkin.

"She's doing all of that. I don't think it's working."

"He's smiling. How?"

Minerva returned to her stew.

"You didn't think it wasn't odd? Your sister and Severus Snape?"

"I stayed out of it. Severus can ruin his life however he chooses." Minerva shoveled in a spoonful of stew, hoping to finish before they did.

"She still is very beautiful. McGonagalls age so well."

"Are you trying to suck up to me, Remus?" Minerva said with a mouthful of stew. "I have to leave. I have class after 2"

"It's good to see them together again."

Minerva wiped her mouth, tossed the napkin at the romantically appreciative Remus, and stormed out.

Harry and the other Gryffindors were at their table looking up at the shocking display.

"I'm going to be sick."

"She's touching him."

"No." Harry shook his head, closing his eyes. "That is-"

"Remus, what is going on with... the... the... She can't like him?" Harry looked even greener than normal, about the face.

"She was the pretty, nicest smelling Slytherin they could make."

"She's a Slytherin. No way." Ron said. "Bambi, maybe, but...

"But she's an Auror." Hermione cut in.

"Yes. If you had spent the war going to school in Slytherin, you'd probably join our side too. She is a very tough woman, "Remus nodded. "She was almost Head Girl. About three years ahead of us. They should have given her the post, after all she had to put up with. But it went to another Gryffindor. I don't even remember who."

"Well, I'm glad a Slytherin wasn't head girl. But why would she do... that to Snape..."

"Yes. Snape was made Prefect that year. They had to put up with so much. So many people turned in those years. Imagine if everyone in your class joined the Death Eaters."

"I guess Slytherins never change."

"Harry."

"What?" Ron protested. "It's true, Professor Lupin."

"Don't say things like that, Harry, Ron. While us Marauders were running around stealing underwear and hexing toilets, they were already in the middle of the war. Slytherin is always hardest hit during any war."

"That's because they start them all."

"They have families, friends, lives. It's all rather sad."

Snape shoved her lightly off his lap with a chuckle.

"He's not shouting at her."

"He's making eye contact."

Remus shook his head in disbelief. "I never said it made any sense. They were a weird couple, Vesta and Snape." Remus furrowed his eyebrows

"You mean she liked Snape when they were at school?" Ron asked.

"We always wondered what he was brewing up in his room. Obviously it was some kind of freakish love potion." Remus smirked. "She's always liked him. We figured she was dating him to torque off Lucius Malfoy."

"That's so bizarre." Ron shuddered. "I might not ever be able to sleep ever again."

"With Polaris here, it's as if all the Angels are back."

"Angels?"

"They were the first female Aurors," Remus said. "We were so proud of them. Sirius was always bragging. He'd never admit he was proud of his sister, but from the way he wouldn't shut up about her, it was obvious."

Remus sat down, "They were the three prettiest, strongest girls in school. Vesta McGonagall, Polaris Black, and Denise Dikeapolis. Later, she married Frank Longbottom. Harry, your father had the biggest thing for her. A huge crush. But she wouldn't give him the time of day. He asked her out thirteen times."

Harry, for once, wasn't quite sure that he wanted to here about his father's romantic life. He wasn't even sure he liked the thought of his parents having a romantic relationship with each other, let alone with anyone else. Once, Ron had found a very odd photograph of James and Lily Potter playing pass the wand. Harry had actually thrown it away. He did not want to think that someone's face had been in his mother's brassiere, even if it was his father's.

"He even asked her to the Dragon Moon Ball in 1975."

"Well, that's nice.... Now."

"What's the Dragon Moon Ball?" Ginny asked.

"It's a once in a lifetime event. Which means they have something like it every year. But it was such an amazing night." He smiled. "That's the first time I can remember with Lily. When we started palling around with her. Your Mother was absolutely hilarious, insanely funny. She could get me to laugh about anything."

Harry just knew he was going to finish this story. About his father having... S-E-X. There would be no escape.

"Yes. She was very pretty. Very special. James had to be bashed on the head a few times, but eventually he noticed. He is probably the only person who ever really appreciated her."

Harry looked at Remus's wrinkled soft smile. "You miss her?"

"They loved each other very much. You know how I knew they were meant to be together? Well, on your Mum's seventeenth birthday he got her a piece of Greek money, a 30,000 drachma. Lily framed it. No one knew what that was about. We never got a chance to ask them what was so special. I still remember that ball."

"Who did you take to the ball?" Hermione smiled.

"What?"

"Did you have someone special you took to the ball?" Hermione repeated, in a saccharine voice.

"Did you take your "friend" Padfoot?" Ron asked, waggling his eyebrows.

"What? No thanks. He was pretty skuzzy. Not very bright, either."

"But then who did you take?" Ron asked.

"I don't mean to shock you."

The three began hounding him for an answer. Soon, even Harry was too curious to stand it.

"Who was it?" Harry teased him.

"You aren't going to get mad at me?"

"No." The three of them shook their heads. Harry smiled.

Remus sat back.