Where Angels Fear to Tread…

"Never confuse brains with luck or vice versa."

Ferengi Rules of Acquisition

Part 2- After Dinner

Bambi McGonagall realized that she was going to be late for supper, but she wasn't hungry. She straightened her mirror.

Her car was a tomato red Chevy Thunderbird. She gripped the wheel and hugged the last turn to Hogwarts. This car was a present for her all OWL sweep in 5^th year. She pulled in every OWL there was (of course that was before Defense Against the Dark Arts had it's own OWL.) Father had insisted his Baby get what ever she wanted.

Never mind that it cost a small fortune and the steering wheel was American style (on the right side and not the left.) She never touched the ground anyway; why should it matter? It got a few odd looks by cops who wondered how had someone managed to park it in a parking lot and not drive on the wrong side of the road and, obviously, the few Muggles who saw a giant flying car. But Bambi was never above using memory charms. That's what they were for.

She had been the envy of every witch in the class of 1982, but she also would have been the envy of everyone in the class of 1981. The NEWTS had nearly killed her, but she did well. Why she never became Head Girl she never knew. If Lucius Malfoy had pulled it off why couldn't she buy the position? Life was a bastard sometimes.

Most of the sixth and seventh year boys were gawking at the gorgeous witch in the red convertible, slack-jawed. Her hair was sexy, her legs were sexy, even her nose was sexy. She wore shoes with ankle straps and a robe slit up to the waist. It made you wonder if she was wearing underwear. Everyone looked down.

"Oh my god."

"Man, that is one sexy witch."

She slung her satchel over her shoulder and walked towards the castle.

Oooooohh Witchy Woman see how high she flies.

Oooooohh Witchy Woman, she got the moon in her eyes.

***

Bill Weasley invited Ron, Harry, Neville and Hermione out to dinner in Hogsmeade. But seeing as the spell hadn't worn off, Hermione had told Bill "to jump in the lake." She couldn't be blamed for her reaction. For some reason, after hearing it was an Atlantaean restaurant, Neville decided to head back for school with Hermione,.

Later in the dining hall, Hermione wanted to ask Neville why he hadn't gone.

"I can't eat Atlantean food. It's so... uggh."

"Bill eats such weird things." Ginny trembled.

"I hate Bill Weasley," Hermione muttered, stabbing her chicken.

"Why are you angry at my brother?"

"Your brother is a prat," Hermione snarled, brandishing the chicken at Ginny.

"He just..."

"Bill tried to show us a love potion and Hermione smelled it, and it back fired," Neville said.

"Yeah. Exactly the kind of thing he would try. Stupid Bill," Hermione grumbled.

The woman came into the dining hall. The red head in tight low cut red robes. Forks fell out of mouths. She occupied every pair of eyes. She sauntered slowly towards the faculty, for a bit of advice. She was quite lost.

Oooooohh Witchy Woman see how high she flies.

Oooooohh Witchy Woman, she got the moon in her eyes.

Ginny scratched her chin and got out of her seat.

"Is your name Bambi?" Ginny asked.

"Yes. It is. Bambi McGonagall." The woman smiled.

"I thought so." Ginny kicked her in the shin.

The woman shrieked.

"That is what you get for being mean to my brother, you Pear Tartlet!"

"Ginny!" Hermione gasped.

"You're supposed to kick it in the heart," Fred said. George held up his fingers in a cross.

"What are you doing?" Hermione asked.

"You monstrous little brats." Bambi McGonagall glared at them. "I remember you two."

"You better not forget what happened last time. Go soak your head, you Super-tart," Fred growled. George just growled.

Bambi McGonagall hitched up her skirt and stormed out of the room.

"What was that all about?"

"Family gossip. Go stab your chicken, Hermione," George said.

At the restaurant, Harry was excited. No one had ever been willing to be seen in public with him at a restaurant before. The Dursleys had left him home, and brought back empty doggy bags (Dudley finished them in the car).

The restaurant was called Plato's Vengeance. Harry got the chicken (it being the only thing he could pronounce and the cheapest thing on the menu.) Ron had something that looked like a cross between a Fish potpie and a sea anemone, with little fingers wiggling still. Harry could not be forced or coaxed into eating anything that actually moved. The most mobile being Bill's Xaxlketcheratades Pastries. Through most of the dinner Bill had to pin them down with his fork. Harry wondered if the downfall of the Atlantaean people had in fact been bizarre cooking. But being as Bill was there, well, it made it just about a perfect weekend.

After dinner Harry and Ron were obliged to invite Bill to come back to Hogwarts. It was usually allowed and his train wasn't leaving until 10:00. Besides, they had to find Fred and George and Ginny. Bill went to the washroom in the tower while Ron looked at his leftovers.

The three Weasley Siblings crossed their eyes and arms in rage. They looked at Ron.

"I didn't know you three wanted to come," Ron said. "I thought you guys hated Atlantaean food."

"I'm afraid there has been an incident," Fred said.

"What's up?" Ron asked

"You know, She-who-must-not-be-trusted."

"She's here," Ginny nodded. "I kicked her in the shin."

"Bambi McGonagall." Ron gritted his teeth. "Here. I thought the owls and cats would scare off her kind."

"Yeah." George nodded.

"Oh no, Bill's in the bathroom. She can't be here at Hogwarts now."

"No. Keep him in there. You know they can't be in the same place."

"You are being awfully mean," Hermione said. "What did she ever do to you?"

"That is a scarlet woman if I ever seen one," George said.

Hermione sat down.

"She's Bambi McGonagall," Ginny said.

"Is she related to Professor McGonagall?" Harry asked innocently.

"You have no clue who she is?" George shook his head.

"Firstly, she cheated on Bill seventeen times in their senior year," Ron said

"Seventeen times? How did she find seventeen boys to snog?" Hermione tried to work on the logistics.

"She only went on with him 'cause he was Head Boy."

"She slept with everyone in Slytherin, and a lot of the boys in Gryffindor. She even slept with one of the Dark Arts Professors, and got him fired."

"She also got the old Potions master fired too. It was never proven but every knew it."

"We had to straighten Bill out. See, what happened after they graduated, she flirted with Charlie. Asked him about his dragon scars. Charlie wouldn't cross his own brother. So she lied and said he made a pass at her. She almost got Bill and Charlie to duel."

"That's horrible."

"But Mum set her right."

"Mum, What did your mum do? She's sweet. How could she-" Harry said

"Be quiet... You'll hear."

The tall red head began walking, a huge timpani drum began playing

Boom baba Boom baba Boom.

She sat down. The beautiful woman shook her head.

Boom babababa boom.

"Where is that coming from?"

The drum continued to follow her.

"It's called Environmental Music. The music follows wherever it goes," Fred said.

"How did that happen?"

"We don't know," George said. "Mum just started sputtering and turning bright red. This was the result."

Bambi crossed her legs, a sultry sax solo. It was as though she was inside of a movie. Bambi stood up and the sexy drum rift followed her. The Gypsy Rose Lee Cake Walk song began playing.

"She's lucky. When Mum found out what kind of tart Bambi was she made up a curse on the spot. If she'd been coherent, Bambi would have been a stain on the ceiling."

"No counter curse?"

"No. Unless Mum forgives her."

Harry giggled. It was a rather funny curse. To see this tall beautiful woman constantly surrounded by sappy music.

Bill came out of the bathroom as if he had heard the music.

"Bambi McGonagall." Bill got a stupid look on his face, as if his IQ had suddenly dripped down into his shoes.

"NO!" the Weasleys shouted.

"Hello, Bill Weasley," Bambi looked him up and down. "You look so great."

"I haven't seen you since... since you tried to hit on my dad in the Parking lot at the Ministry Beltane Ball and Mummy got mad."

"She hit on Daddy?" Ron said. "EWWWW!"

Ginny shook her head. "I'm going to have nightmares."

"Oh, Billy-boy, how's it been?" Bambi petted his chest

"You look wonderful," Bill said.

Immediately all four Weasleys held him back.

"Snap out of it." Fred yanked on his ponytail.

"Come on," Ron said.

"We are getting you out of here," George said.

"We're being awfully rude," Bill protested.

"Good," Ron said, yanking on his robe.

"Owl me, Baby-girl," Bill said.

"Alright, Billy Boy."

"No. Bambi McGonagall is the Anti-Christ," George growled. The other four Weasley children had to drag him out of the room. They picked his body off the ground and flipped Bill onto his side and carried him off.

"Hang on, we have to deprogram him. It's a good thing that Errol doesn't like her either. He dropped every one of her letters in the sewer. You'd think he could read."

"17 times," Hermione said wonderingly.

"Who could do that to poor Bill Weasley?" Harry shook his head as trumpet music followed Bambi out of the room.

"Baby." Minerva put her hand on her hip as she watched her notorious sister being glared at by all the Weasley's.

"Minnie," Bambi smiled.

"You aren't bothering the Weasleys again?"

"Never."

"You leave that Bill Weasley alone. You've done enough by him. It's a good thing Molly's not a hand at charms or you might have ended up with an extra arm." Minerva said.

"Sister. You wound me. I care about him too. You don't think I felt when we parted. I did. Bill's a dear. Soft, sexy, smart. Little birthmark on his-"

"You just keep away from him."

"Alright. Diane's here by now?"

"Everyone is here but you," Minerva said. She looked at her sister's green, glowing eye makeup. She looked more sinister than a clown, but not any more dignified. Minerva had given up on trying to change the person her sister was. They never fought. Bambi was probably the only one who never argued with anyone. She could have been the heart of the family if she wasn't so selfish.

"I am the last." Bambi smiled. "I'm sure you didn't miss me. I always show up right where I need to be. Isn't so wonderful that I'm lucky and smart?"

"How is Malastacea's doing?" Minerva asked.

"I'm working on several new blends. We're going to come out with some new Glamours."

"I thought with that new Glibbity Gibbit's breath spray on the market..."

"I'm not worried about competition. I can get you a nice company discount."

"No thanks. I don't like to use glamours," Minerva said.

"Not that I'm saying you need it. Lots of men find older sophisticated women attractive. Of course most of them are senile."

Minerva rolled her eyes.

Snape approached. "Speaking of which," Bambi cooed, "there's your honey."

"He's not my honey. He's Severus Snape. If he heard you calling him that..."

"Who is your boyfriend then, the dwarf? The giant? Dumbledore?"

"Baby, don't be so tedious." Minerva clutched her head.

"Well if he's not yours, he's up for grabs."

"What?" Minerva said.

Bambi smiled. "Well I guess you do have a pulse. Anyone could date Severus, he is haunting and dark. I bet Daddy wouldn't like his sort."

"That doesn't mean anything. Severus's personal life is his own."

Snape arrived, straightened his cloak.

"Ah, I hear the percussive steps of Young Miss Bambi McGonagall."

"Ah, Mr. Snape," she said, smiling, her voice throaty and hungry. She held her hand to his lips.

He shook her hand before he had to kiss it, "I should have been listening for the sax solo when you sat down."

He rolled his eyes knowingly at Minerva. He gave Bambi a sharp look to cut off any leering.

"Oh Professor. You look so handsome today," Bambi purred. "What have you done to yourself? Glamour, scental potion behind the ears? I just know you're wearing something. English Leather. No you'd never leave it to anyone else. Your cologne is maddening."

"I'm not wearing cologne. That is Myrrh. I'm using it in a consciousness altering potion."

"I would just die to see your laboratory."

"You just might." Snape glared at her.

"I'll bet we could cook up something marvelous together. Hot, steamy...."

"Quite."

Bambi looked around. "What a marvelous Laboratory. So big, spacious, and masculine."

"Yes. It is a dungeon."

"The room a man works in is always just an extension of their own soul. Don't you agree? The Feng Shui here is just..." she let out a soft moan.

"I have skeletons in the closet," Snape said. "Behind the Newt eyeballs."

"Did you remember the old Master of Slytherin, Professor Snape? Old Dark Arts teacher. He couldn't possibly... You wear the mantle of power so much better. He was a bit of a disappointment."

Snape didn't respond. "Here are my poisons." He opened the door.

She opened her pocket book.

"I could see you as headmaster of Hogwarts in ten years."

"Well, I should trust the first girl to get a NEWT in Divination from Sibyll Trelawney." Snape had turned 'callous sarcasm' into a facial expression. Along with "pity and disgust."

"Well, I have feelings. I'm a very instinctual creature. I run on instinct, impulse, feeling." Her fingers were tickling and tracing the table towards his hand

"Feel something else. You might get acid on your hands." He picked up her hand and placed it palm down on the bottle of Sundew gel.

"Severus," she said, in a sweet, sugar-melting voice.

"Bambi?" Snape asked, trying for a tone so saccharine it could melt stone.

"Oh, Severus. You must know what effect you have on a woman."

"No. But I afraid you will show me, won't you?"

"You are the most mysteriously dark and beautiful and haunted and..."

Snape looked her deep in the eyes.

"And your nose is so... big."

"Bambi..." he whispered her name in her ear, feather soft. She sighed.

Then he grabbed her handbag. "You realize Muggle flash photography will not work at Hogwarts."

Bambi jumped a foot in the air.

"For your lovely industrial espionage." He poured out the purse, revealing a Muggle spy camera and a lot of makeup.

"Malastacea's Powders not selling well?" Snape raised one eyebrow

He rattled her camera to see if she had taken any pictures.

"I'll chalk it up to too many spy movies."

"Oh blast. How am I supposed to... I am going to be ruined. Glibbity Gibbits is ruining malastacea's we need help."

Snape brushed the camera. "Well, your career in Love Potions is over. Cut throat world. I heard that Cleaning Potions are a bit of a profit. Perhaps you can hire yourself out as a test subject. I'm sure you have an immunity to several toxins."

"I don't have anywhere else to turn. I couldn't think on what to do."

"Oh, here's the speech."

"I'll make it worth your while."

"Here's a tip," Snape said, clutching her shoulders. "Find some other sap to suck the life out of."

He yanked a hair out of her scalp.

"Ow! Bastard! What was that for, you slimy—"

"Because I needed Veela hair. The Weasleys, Azrael Bale, Aquarius Monkshood, they all learned their lesson. Why should I have to? I thank providence I never had to teach you. The Board of Governors would have fired me in one semester with you about."

"You don't cross a McGonagall. Hell hath no Fury like a woman Scorned." Bambi's green laser beam eyes cut him. Snape stood up tall. There was something desperate and angry in her eyes. Something he could fear. What was it? What could this woman do to him? He was thrown off balance. But he felt compelled to draw his wand this as if to protect himself. This useless woman... He touched it, ready to-

Bambi clasped her hands. "I'll just tell everyone that you are a buggering ponce. You couldn't possibly be straight after this. No one says no to me."

"Is that it?" Snape shrugged.

Bambi scowled.

"I tell you, I thought better of an Ex-Slytherin." He waved her out of his lab. "Go ahead. The already think I'm a vampire. I would have at least tried to work in an attempted rape or something."

"But..."

"What man in their right mind would want to have sex with me?" Snape said.

"But I need you. I'm so very tired. I'm so very desperate. Please, Severus. I will do anything."

Snape crossed his arms, turned around, and laughed.

The laugh echoed down the hall.

Vesta appeared at the front of the dungeon. Bambi was prostrate at Snape's feet, weeping piteously.

"Snape, how dare you try to work your charms on my little sister?"

"Which one, the full body bind, the silencing one, or the stink?"

Vesta chuckled. She stepped over her sister.

In white and black she slunk in, her body moving serpentine inside her clothes. She could take a man's breath away in a step. And those McGonagall eyebrows were still hers.

"Severus, Sweetie Darling, kiss your sweet Vesta." She bussed him on both cheeks.

"Vesta, you do look a sight in that robe," Severus said. "I wouldn't think charming and disgracing your little sister would require such formal dress."

"It's a Diore." The elder witch smiled.

"I love the makeup. It looks like God himself put it on." He kissed her offered hand. She honked his nose.

"You look so much better in makeup, sissie." Bambi stood up. She had stopped weeping quite swiftly considering that he life was over, as she put it.

"Baby, go and find someone else to bother. I have business."

Vesta McGonagall pushed aside some ingredients and sat down.

"Well, Vesta, it's good of you to grace my dungeon. What do you want?"

"I am here with MI 7 ½ . They are on the move against the situation involving You Know-who. We have a certain autonomy that the Aurors lack. You probably wouldn't find Moody or Davies or Black down here."

"Well, what could you possibly ask of this simple Potions teacher?"

A faint drum roll sounded in the background. Vesta picked up the skull.

"Oh, Severus. Why didn't I snatch you up when you were younger? Then I'd have utter control over you."

"I'm my own man and you love it that way. I love it that way," Severus said. "Do you need a light? Incendio."

Vesta accepted the light on the end of her cigarette, then grabbed his wand, blowing it out.

"Yes. But I can't help it, Sweetie. I'm greedy and unreasonable. I'm a woman after all."

"You're also smoking around flammable toxins."

"Lumos." Severus cast a light towards the eavesdropping youngest McGonagall. Bambi gasped.

"Accio skull."

Vesta blasted the skull toward the wall.

"Don't bother eavesdropping, Baby. Severus is just being tediously proper."

Bambi whimpered and a huge angered crash of cymbals followed after her.

"She can't eavesdrop anymore."

"Oh, it must wound her," Severus said. "But I think this is a very inappropriate conversation, tedious though it maybe for her to hear."

"You are a canny thing, Sweetie Dahling."

"Please refrain from fawning over me," Severus said. "And refrain from using that odious moniker."

"Oh but it's fun... Your face gets so squiggled up, even now. After all these years."

"My face does not squiggle up."

"Well, on to business. I do know you are top double agent in our camp right now."

"Agent, then?"

"You're the only one who's infiltrated the Death Eaters."

Severus didn't answer.

"You might be the only person I could ask. So I will. Is there a wakening potion?"

"A wakening potion?" Snape said, "You expect me to have a wakening potion? They are very rare."

"I know that much. Though I don't exactly understand why. My people figure if there is any person who could make one, he's in this room."

"To alter consciousness is a very delicate process. There hasn't been a wakening potion for years. Well a real one. Most people just use Ennervate or use stimulants. You can't wake someone up if they wish to remain sleeping. "

"My sister has a nose for these things. It's her trade. I know that it would have to be a Will altering potion. Otherwise you could just use caffeine or cold water or shake them. Bambi's specialty is Transvolitionals and Aphrodisiacs. She made a few good spreads in the Alchemist journals. She says she could do it."

"And you aren't taking her up on it?" Severus said

"I'm not dragging in my family. You know Bambi."

Severus rolled his eyes and twirled his finger in the air.

"The worst thing of it is, she'd want glory. You'll do it for money probably."

"I don't like money."

"No, you don't. Otherwise you would have left teaching," Vesta said. "You'll have Carte Blanche. Anything you have to do. Anything you need. But your services will be commandeered. No teaching. You can stay at the Hogwarts lab or go to the Ministry labs. We have many resources."

"I've done it that way already. The last person who let me do whatever I want was far more generous."

"Dumbledore?"

Severus got a sad grin on his face, "Have you ever heard the Death Eater health plan?"

Vesta sighed. "Must be fabulous. Dental included?"

"Only the best for the Nameless One's army of misery and darkness."

Severus paused and paced around the classroom.

"A wakening potion: Something that would render someone awake who was sleeping or pretending to be sleeping. The trick is, just about anything will wake a sleeping person if they want to be awake. The only thing that wake up a person is the will to wake up." Severus rolled the thought between his fingers, "I could look in antidotes to the great Sleeping Spells. Read up a bit. I've been working in Poisons for too long."

"For Queen and Country, Snape. You'll get a medal."

"Really? I hope it's Iron. It scares off demons"

Severus closed his eyes, thinking.

"What about the Death Eaters? If I have Carte Blanche to the Potions facilities, so do they. It's too hard; they'd want me to spy." Severus's eyes would not open.

"You're double agent. Maybe triple. Say it's an opportunity to get into the ministry. We'll feed you well. Just enough to make it look like you've really been spying."

"So you want me to give the Death Eaters bad evidence. Like an ugly little Trojan Horse? And the wakening spell. A small price to pay," Severus said. "I don't know if it could be done without an Imperius curse. How do you wake someone who wants to be asleep?"

"Queen and Country not enough for you? Nor money. Nor Glory. How's this? Do it for sweet, starry eyed, Vesta McGonagall, who absolutely adores you. It will be like a story book." Her voice could get as caustic and offhand as Severus's.

"Are you trying to encourage me or frighten me?"

"Just do it. I don't care how."

"Give me a day to chew on it. I won't promise something I can't deliver."

***

Harry and Ron wandered a round the hall from dinner.

"Aye this is a nice room to set up my weary bones Minnie."

"Well you just sit down. I'll get you a cup of tea."

"Tea, tea. I've had so such tea I could float back to Edinborough. I know that boy took my spectacles on the train. Can't see a thing."

"Diane, I'm the one who wears spectacles. You never have." Minerva tried not to shout.

Minerva plunked her in the chair, she saw Harry and Ron over hearing their conversation in the hall. Minerva looked up hopefully, looking for someone else to talk with.

"Oh Harry Mr. Weasley. Come in here and meet Diane."

"How do you do Mrs. McGonagall?" Harry lowered his head.

A lighting swift cane hit his shin.

"That is Ms. McGonagall lady. What be yer name you young milksop?"

"Diane. Do not hit my students!" Minerva rose to her feet.

"This Diane is Harry-"

"Harry Porter. The very boy who lived. Come witcha har boy lemmee get a look at yer face."

Harry barely recognized the phrase, "Pardon?"

"Come here. So I cin look at ya. Dinna ya speak English?" Diane grabbed his cheek. "Look at that. Never did I expect to see such a sight. Even thought he looks a bit like he's been flying onna broom with that hair of his. Pay you no mind. Curly hair is the sight of an active mind. Who ever thought I'd be sitting her with Harry Porter."

"You're not it's actually Harry-"

"Your Da was a great man Harry. Iris. He was the fastest son of gun. My Da said that he'd never seen a seeker like him. You play Quidditch. For him to get Maximillian McGonagall's notice he was great," Diane said. "Shame our fathers had to die, aye. Ah well we keep going."

"Diane. Please." Minerva practically pounded her foot. She sounded like Ginny when Molly pulled out the baby pictures to strangers and their sons.

"Da always said that James was the better seeker," Minerva said, "Course my money is on Artie. She won the Quidditch cup for Hufflepuff 5 years in a row. And they won 3 years after that. Da taught everything we needed to know about Quidditch."

"He was the Greatest seeker in the world."

"In his time," Minerva whispered.

Diane thudded her cane at her little sister's blasphemy.

"I'm sure Dad was much better than me," Harry said.

"I like this one. He's a nice guy if he is."

"Diane is my eldest sister," Minerva said, "More like an Auxillary mum."

Diane said, "Well you pert Miss needed someone. Otherwise you would have gadded about the country looking for rocks, and stone and old books, never making nothing of yourself."

"You mean becoming a treasure hunter. I was 12."

"You weren't twelve when you were floozing about with all those fast young men of ill repute. Quidditch players and Dark wizards, and Catholics-"

Minerva smiled "Since when are Quidditch players in the same league as Dark Wizards?"

"Or that colored chap with long braids in his hair and the Chevrolet Van. He was shifty one."

"Shifty? Bruce Jordan was not shifty."

"He was. His van always smelled like catnip and hempen and he always smiled like a great idjit."

"That's not shifty."

"But we all know that Jerome Jordan was a war profiteer. He sold his fathers land to get coal. A Capitalist. Making money offa Muggles all through the Crimean War."

"The Crimean War?" Ron asked, "That was a hundred and fifty years ago or something."

"In my day a decent girl wouldn't cotton to those types. He was shifty as Mung Fletcher anyday."

"I can't believe you are bringing Bruce Jordan up in front of my students. And for your information he is one of the most powerful wizards in the American Confederation," Minerva insisted. "He's retired and a diplomat and... married three times."

"Fine..." Diane settled into her seat with a smug grin.

"Look I could have been Mrs. McGonagall-Jordan living in Tahiti with his other three wives on my alimony."

Harry tried not look like he was changing the subject. He was sure he didn't want to hear about Minerva McGonagall's ex-boyfriends, "So where in Scotland do you live Mizzz McGonagall.?"

"I'm in from Tygwer's Keep, Alt-na Shea, Scotland. A wee village, both Muggle and wizard. We weren't as segregated as our other friends. Did you know that I could change a tire and drive a flatbed truck? And know the names of the last three prime ministers?"

"No, I didn't," Harry shook his head.

"There are more of them?" Ron whispered, "I thought Bambi was the only one... Vesta, Bambi, now Diane?"

"Our family has five girls, Mr. Porter." Diane said.

"Tiger's Keep. Why do they call it that? There aren't any tigers in Scotland." Harry asked

"Not now. I remember 1915, I was a wee gel. My da, Maximillian McGonagall, drove'em out of Scotland with one hex. They don't tell ya that in yer Perfessor Binns do they. St. Patty can dance the snaykes out of Potatoe-land. But a McGonagall, it was the curse of our house."

"It was one tiger, Diane. It escaped from the zoo."

"You mind your tongue, Minnie. This is yer heritage."

"Like the time you kicked Mr. Adolph Hitler?" Minerva said.

"It happened. It's bad manners to question widows."

***

A figure sat on her rented broom. She sighed. It was late evening at Hogwarts already by the time her trip ended.

She arrived at the gates.

Snape should have felt something crawling on his back. It was her. That wretched, wretched woman. His nostrils flared.

"Auror Polaris Black."

"This section isn't zoned for ravens, Mr. Snape."

"You tell him to go." Snape pulled him up.

"It would serve you and the twitty bird right if there were an owl incident. The Familiar Code is very clear."

Caius lowered his head hissed and flapped away, "Smell. Smell."

"You've hurt his feelings." Snape frowned.

Caius could feel the Killing curse. The Smell was what revolted him. He couldn't bear its presence. Snape couldn't help sympathising when Polaris Black in flying jodpurs and her golden vest appeared. Didn't she wear anything but yellow and black? The woman was fanatical about her job. Auror Black.

"Welcome Back to Hogwarts, Auror Black, It's almost been a year."

The black haired witch dug her finger into his chest, "Now listen up, you piece of scum, this isn't high tea and crumpets. You are impeding the progress of a formal investigation. You will assist us no matter what mealy mouthed pathetic little excuse you can think up.

"That's your best? I've seen this 'good cup bad cup' game. I'm a teacher of teenage boys. There is little you can do at this point to scare me off. Short of blowing off my head."

Snape sat down "If there's one thing the Blacks are good at, it's senseless vengeance."

"I have no brother."

"He'll be so surprised."

A quick draw wand quickly shot out and jab him in the chin.

"Don't test me. My 'silly wand wavings' have gotten a lot sharper since I last caught you." Polaris dropped him.

Snape lowered himself to his chair. She was no woman to be trifled with, the Auror Black.

"Black. Behave yourself." Vesta cut in. She clasped her hands. Polaris let him go, "Denise woke up last night. She's coming to. We need a potion to wake her up."

"Denise..." Snape froze.

"Vesta," Polaris protested

"He has to know, Polaris," Vesta said.

"I still say she recognized me. She spoke to me," Polaris told Vesta.

Snape sat back in his seat. "Neville is one of my students. Worst Potions student ever." He looked at the table like he had been hit by something, "She was a very... very..." Snape was rarely speechless.

Polaris stood up. "I'm sure she wouldn't appreciate the compliment from the likes of you."

"She's waking up, Severus," Vesta said.

"What?"

Vesta touched his shoulder, like she was holding down a struggling child. "It's bad enough to lose Frank to the dark. But...If the Unspeakable is coming to, that means..."

"What could it mean?" Snape asked.

"It must be..." Vesta looked around with the paranoia of a true warrior. "I can't say it. But This one... He Who Must Not Be Named..."

"You can say it, Vesta. I doubt he's listening in the hall." Snape said

"Very funny, Severus. I think he'll be looking out for his old chums too," Vesta snorted.

Polaris sat down on the worktable, "Three nights ago, she woke up and called for me. She said 'She is going to kill him. Aquarius err... you know, Black's little brother. Chap with the big black bike. Go find him.' That's what I intend to do," Polaris Black said,

"Always knew that woman was extraordinary. Looks, brains, and good taste too, wanting Sirius Black to die. I think he's been on this planet a little too long."

"We all know how you feel, you're the first to call him by his initials and mean it. Sirius Orion Black," Vesta said. "You see the problem. As Black is out of our hands she's given us something of a mystery."

"Or a prophecy," Snape said. "She didn't have anything else to say?"

"She went back to sleep. Not so much as a 'Where's Frank?' 'Where's Neville' I 'Have to take a leak'? Nothing. She says some cryptic phrase about a famous criminal and nods off, " Polaris said. "Just odd."

"Sirius didn't reveal himself until 1981 with the Potters." Vesta bit her cheek. They all sat down. Mulling over the dark scene.

Vesta had actually been heading the squad of hit wizards when they had surrounded Black in the All Saint's Day. The clean up was unspeakable. Gruesome. They hadn't had such a high body count since the werewolf slayings in Kent. She walked over burned flesh, to see Black staring, mindless, wordless. Nothing to say, nothing to justify. That's what made her angry. Vesta smoothed her thumb against the one long wrinkle in her brow. All Saints Day, 1981.

Snape shook his head. He wasn't at the site. He could only remember the news. The horrible news. The wonderful news. Voldemort was dead, killed in a freak accident, but 12 others followed. Innocent Muggles walking along on the sidewalk, Sirius Black vaporized it with a word. Peter Pettigrew had been useless up until his very death. He didn't stop Black from killing them all. The Boy who lived, the Rat who didn't. It was as fair and foul a day they had ever seen. All Saints Day, 1981.

Polaris remembered that Halloween. It started so silly, so normal. A respite from everything that was happening, the Death Eater attacks, the jealousies.

Something about the church bells sounding. Waiting for Sirius still at midnight, before the attack on the Potters. How it all went wrong. All Saints Day, 1981.

Vesta, as always, was the one to open her mouth.

"So she's keeping something in her head about Sirius Black. Everybody wants to know what it is." Vesta smiled softly bitterly.

"What if it's useless now? What if she's trying to warn us about him turning to Voldemort? Or what if she's gone senile and thinking about 1981? She's been out of it since 1982."

"She said that Voldemort will kill Sirius Black," Vesta said.

"So we have the problem. What can we do?"

"Simple, keep her alive. Figure out what it is and send her back home. She's been kept away from her son too long," Polaris said

"I'll help you." Snape said.

"Knew you'd come around." Vesta punched him in the shoulder.

"Neville deserves a mother. If she can be reached it's about time they met up."

****

Neville walked into the hospital behind his grandmother. She carried her needlepoint one arm avoiding eye contact with all the residents of St. Mungos.

"Hi Sam." The wizard popped his head out of the door.

Neville smiled, "Hey, how are you doing?"

The man was very tall and hairy with a long beard, unshorn. "My main man at the Department. I knew a guy like you'd be about. With all this business about with the sleeping and all this hubbub."

He was one of the regulars, the lifers as they sometimes called them. He was too much of a danger to walk the streets.

"I didn't think you would be out of your room. Didn't they lock the door?" Neville said.

"They didn't lock the door. I think... He's taking a bit of a quiet time. Enough to garner up support. There is a war going on. That's why I need you to keep sending in reports."

"You want to frisk me? Check for explosives." Neville held up his arms

"I trust you, Sam. If I can't trust Sam who can I..."

The wizard pulled out his wooden hairbrush, using it like a truth detector, "Clean as a whistle, Sam. True and blue."

"What happened last night?"

"They say that a princess was killed in there. But it's all hush hush. That's all MI 7½. I'm only a simple Auror. They also say they gotta lot of fudge up there. Or maybe no fudge." He ruffled his hair "You think I could get some fudge. They give me a lot of chocolate. But nothing they made. It was in plastic as I think there is gas inside. They make plastic out of gasoline. I wouldn't drink gasoline. I would like if someone here to cook my food. But they say that they don't have time. And we wouldn't want anymore accidents. He's always about. He could sneak in here if we don't--"

The man looked around. He, the ever present he. He was Voldemort, of course, there was no doubt about it. He was an Auror. once, and that would always be the case.

"What about a chocolate frog?"

"Oh yes. Your chocolate frog." He winked. He assumed it was a code.

Neville watched him catch the escaping frog, in a dangerously skilled pounce. He was built like a Bengal tiger, huge and deadly. No wonder they wouldn't let him wander out in public. Those hands could kill. "Got you, little sucker." The hairy man swallowed it.

"Who's inside?"

Neville opened it, "I already have him." The card was Dumbledore.

"Just like I thought... Dumbledore. I didn't think he'd be so bold to give such an obvious message. You can be sure he knows. He's sending me a message. You know Dumbledore. You just keep sending me messages."

"Do you want me to eat it and destroy the evidence?"

"No this is a code... But I'll figure it out." Frank looked intently at the frog card.

"Goodbye Daddy." Neville said walking to his mother's room.

"Keep on Trucking, Sam."

"Denise, you look lovely," Dr Fennimore, said entering the room.

Denise looked at the sky, propped up in the comfortable chair.

Dr. Fennimore looked again. She was back to before. She stared. As if nothing had happened last night.

"There is someone to see you."

Neville popped out from behind him. "Mum, you're awake today."

"I heard you were sick. I'm sorry I didn't get here this weekend. I know. You probably don't want me to miss school. So I just came on Sunday. But I've gotten a funny feeling lately. Not that Miss Trelawney could teach me anything but breaking tea cups."

He held her hand. "You look nice."

He rested his head against her cheek for his kiss.

"You almost look like you can hear me today."

Neville felt a hand against his hair. He smiled. But then his eyes opened. He stepped back.

Denise looked up, "Neville."

Neville stepped back in sheer surprise' touching the back of his head where she touched him.

"Mum?"
She gulped once, filled her eyes with him. She closed them.

"Sorry, chappie," she said in a gravelly voice

Neville paused, feeling the warmth of her hand still against his head. He couldn't move. He couldn't think.

"Mum."

She closed her eyes.

He walked to the door.

"Neville, you look like you've seen a ghost," Granny said, putting down her needlework.

"Granny. Mum. She touched me. She held me... We've got to go get the doctor."

"Neville, what are you saying?"

Neville was breathless with terrible wonder. "She touched me. She said 'Neville... Sorry, Chappie.'"

"Neville, what nonsense are you talking?" Granny said trying to sit Neville in the chair.

"It's not nonsense. She touched me. It was... She looked at me."

Granny held him down. But he darted out of his seat the second he saw his doctor.

"What is all this?" Dr. Fennimore said.

"Dr. Fennimore, she woke up. She woke up. She touched me. She recognized me. I thought she couldn't."

The doctor gave him a pained frightened look.

"Neville, calm down," Granny said. "You're having a fit."

"Neville, her condition is delicate and mysterious. We can't expect her to wake up."

"Even if she could," Granny said. "Your mother is better off."

"She's not. She's not. She could be awake. She could be walking around. She could be with me. She could be alive. I know what happened. I dreamed all my life she would come back. And she did."

Neville began crying.

Dr. Fennimore let him on the ground "He's just been agitated. I'm sure it was just his imagination. Take him home."

"If that's what you think, doctor."

***

"Did I ever tell you how I invented roller skating in Scotland?"

"Yes."

"It all began when I found that Dolph Hitler chap...."

Harry was about to go into the bathroom and eat his wand like a gun. My god, he'd thought that MinervaMcGonagall was stuffy. Diane swatted him in the shin for sitting with his legs crossed.

Neville was in the bathroom.

"Harry is that you."

"How's your mum Neville? Is she better now or-"

"Harry, I can tell you this."

"Why me?"

"You know things. You don't go off the handle 'cause I say things that don't make sense. You just hear stuff. You know what's really going on."

Harry paused "What happened.

"My Mum woke up. She looked at me and she called my name."

"Your Mum woke up. Neville that's great." Harry smiled.

"No one believes me." Neville said "She did it."

"I feel worse. Why can't I just?"

"Maybe your mum is getting better. It happens."

"Harry. You don't just wake up better. She's been asleep for all these years. She should be dead. She can't be awake. But I saw her."

Harry walked close to him.

"It can't. She's been sleeping all my life. What if she is alive? What if?"

"That's a lot of what ifs?" Harry said.

"I've got terrible feelings. If only I had a bit more divination skill. I could figure it out. But Mum, it was like..."

"It was wonderful. I always thought my mum would wake up one day. It's one of those things that your relatives squash down. Why wouldn't she wake up earlier? Why does she look like that? But I knew it."

"If your Mum is getting better, than maybe if you keep talking to her, visiting her. She'll have to wake up. Maybe you'll wake her up. Because you love her so much."

"Alright."

"It's good enough just talking about it."

"I don't always remember what my mother's touch felt like. I forget what she looks like. I don't remember her voice."

Harry patted Neville on the back. They sat in silence for a few moments trying to sort out their feelings.

Until they heard Professor McGonagall clucking her tongue frustrating.

"Die. Why do ya tell all these stories?"

"They are as true as the day is long.
"You're telling them all wrong

"Diane. He wasn't Winston Churchill, he was Winston Meyers, the green grocer."

Remus Lupin arrived at the Grieves house. The long walk, with Lupe waiting at the end of it. She embraced him, squeezing him a bit.

"Welcome to our house. I'm glad you came. I was afraid you'd break in and the electric fence would turn on. Or Alejandro would turn on the security cameras.

"You don't really have an electric fence?"

"It's our house... Besides, Alejandro is a lot more frightening than chicken wire."

"We only invite the people we like. Anyone else is probably asking for trouble, burglars, dark wizards— "

"Mail carriers, little Girl Guards selling chocolates, oh heavens no."

"Oh, Remus." Lupe tsked. "Try the tomatoes."

"Hi, Polly-girl." Remus hefted her up. The Grieves' human daughter, with a shock of black hair and dark skin.

Pablo ran in. The frail blond boy gave Remus's leg a hug. He was their enraptured son from a Romanian orphanage. He was getting very friendly.

"Hi."

"Damn, he's so cuddly." Lupe said.

Lupe Grieves was a short women, with a large, stately, Hispanic nose. Beautiful eyes, one grey and one chocolate. Remus thought she was very ethnic looking and beautiful. It was hard to match her with her height. She was a good 5'2" in her middle ages, but she made up for it somehow. She had none of the weight of the Alpha females. Most of them lived to be at least 67.

"You look nice Remus." Lupe grinned at him.

"Thank you."

"Don't say a word. It's May. You don't have to tell me anything."
"Anything about what?"

"I'm a werewolf too. Remus, I know you are just starting on your peak."

"How come you have to figure everything out?" Remus asked.

"I'm very, very smart Muggle. Don't try to hide it. You want to see him?"

Remus blushed. "I'm itching for it."

"The polite verb. Just get down to the garden. You don't look in the mood to wait very long. Alejandro is busy. Trust me about the tomatoes; Alejandro is a great gardener."

"Okay."

With the permission from the lady of the house, he seemed to fly down to the greenhouse.

In the Grieves Greenhouse, Alejandro was humming to himself, fixing up the orchids. It was boring work but it was the best he could get. It gave him time to think. The water was warming in the spray bottle.

A peach face love bird hopped towards him.

"Qroi." She bounced on the branch.

"You like that." He said misting the bird with the bottle. "Boy you're spoiled." The lovebird preened indulgently in the hot mist. He shook his head. "You get me in so much trouble. You don't know very much about the world. Bet you think it's all like this."

The room was hot. Very hot. Remus took off his outer robe. Leaving it hung on a plastic hook.

The birds were flopping about. The birds had come to love the greenhouse, and had gotten fat and lazy quickly.

One of the lovebirds landed on Remus's head. The noise alerted the gardener to Remus's presence.

Remus touched his eyes. He smiled. They said nothing.

He plucked the bird off his head.

"Que tal Remie?"

"Asi asi, Querido." The werewolf leaned back.

Alejandro looked at him. In a thick accent he asked, "How are you?"

"I'm getting better, sweetheart." Remus smiled broadly. "I hope you're well. It's nice and sunny today."

"Very sunny."

"And warm."

Alejandro put down the scissors.

He pulled up the mist bottle and squirted it right at Remus.

"Oh you..." Lupin covered his face.

"You no like that, Remie?" Alejandro asked. It was too sexy how he could roll his 'r'. Rrremie, like an animal.

"I'm in my wizard's robes. You can't get me wet. I will die."

Alejandro sprayed towards him. "The birds like it. Do you no like it?"

Remus jumped back, laughing.

Remus stooped for the hose and held it up. Alejandro gulped.

"Hands up!"

"Aye, Dios Mio," Alejandro said.

"I guess I got my hands on your hose," Remus purred.

"I'll say."

Alejandro pointed the spray bottle. Remus fingered the trigger on the end of the hose.

"Don't shoot." Alejandro held up his hand. "I surrender. Do what you will to me."

"You coward."

Remus laughed and squeezed the trigger by accident. He hadn't thought it was plugged in. It splattered against his t-shirt. Remus reeled back, laughing in shock. "Oh Querido. I'm sorry."

Alejandro crouched. "You're in trouble now. You are just a little nasty animal."

"I'm sorry. Please. I'm-"

Alejandro pounced, he latched onto him and Remus fell to the ground.

They laughed nonsensically for minutes, rolling around on the ground.

Alejandro had him lusciously pinned. "Got you."

Remus looked up demurely, "Yes."

Alejandro sniffed him, nuzzled his neck softly.

"You're all wet now, Querido." Remus muttered.

Alejandro plundered Remus's mouth with a thick kiss.

"Why don't you help me take off my clothes?" Remus smiled.

Each of the McGonagall sisters arrived one by one at the door of the staff room. Polaris Black had appeared while they were eating and the house elves had delivered her summons. Vesta and Polaris were already there. Dumbledore was nowhere to be seen. Rather odd considering that the Auror.'s presence might mean a breach in the security of the school. But the only people in that room were that evening were Polaris Black and all the McGonagall sisters. Not even Argus Filch who patrolled the ground, or Hagrid the half giant who kept the keys. Minerva McGonagall had a creepy suspicion that they were being singled out.

Polaris had almost colonized the room, theatrically placing herself in the green leather armchair. From the darkest corner, her diamond hard eyes were glaring at each one of the women who came in.

Minerva found it strange to see such a pair of cold eyes in Severus's chair. While the Potions master indisputably difficult, paranoid, unpleasant and curmudgeonly, he was not Polaris Black. You could argue that she was a psychopath. He would. The idea of those ice eyes staring at her up and down chilled her to the bone.

If Severus found out that she was sitting in his chair, there would be trouble.

"Ladies. Minerva, Diane, Art, Vesta."

All of a sudden there was a fanfare of jazz trumpets then a long drum solo as Bambi clambered to the nearest seat. She finally sat down in the chair closest to the door, unashamed with a huge smile on her face, blinking her large green eyes.

"Sorry, I'm late. I was talking to Professor Vector. Charming man. Brains are always sooo appealing in a man."

Polaris closed her eyes, "and Bambi. I'm glad that Dumbledore could help arrange this reunion. However I am sorry to say it will not be what you think it is."

"Whatever do you mean, Miss Black?" Diane asked.

"Tygwer's Keep is currently being combed for any evidence linking to the escape of and the location of Sirius Black. Your cooperation is appreciated, and will be noted."

The McGonagalls froze.

"What?" Diane shouted.

The five women began shouted questions all at once. Even Vesta was caught off guard, or seemed to be in her canny performance. The Ministry had seized their home. Sirius Black was involved... What on Earth?

"You didn't say you had already seized the Keep? How did you get the warrant so fast?"

"Ladies. Please. We have received psychic evidence that Sirius Black will be in contact with a McGonagall within a few months."

"Psychic Evidence? What is this, Salem? They haven't used psychic evidence in this country for 200 years, " Minerva said.

"The vision of a well-known and respected Auror."

"You broke into our house on the word of some crakpot fraud's alleged 'vision?'" Minerva broiled underneath her collar reddening, her hair seemed to bristle to twice its size, and her pupils narrowed to slits

"Miss McGonagall." Polaris sprung to her feet. "I assure you, the source is incorruptible. She is no crackpot. She has selflessly served her country in the defense of Dark Wizards for over twenty years. I believe her."

Vesta slumped into the green armchair "You mean... You mean Denise... Denise don't you?"

"What is she talking about?" Art said.

"A lot of nonsense. Well, you can tell Miss Denise 'Whoever-she-is' to kindly ... mind her own business." Minerva caught herself before she could say something much more coarse.

"She can stick her prophecy up her bloody arse!" Art pounded her great fist on the coffee table.

"Thank you, Art." Minerva nodded. "I believed you captured our sentiments completely."

"You... Denise... I've got to sit down." Vesta slid into the chair and clutched her own face.

"I strongly suggest that you stay here at Hogwarts, while we look for Black. Any other type of behavior might be seen as suspicious. More than enough grounds to have you arrested, and expedite the investigation"

"Expedite the investigation? You're already broken into our home without our permission." Diane shook her cane. "It's uncalled for."

"We have all the evidence we need and if the Keep is truly clean you have no need to be worried. You're all on vacation after all."

Diane sat down, "But I didn't tidy up the parlor. I haven't swept it in nearly a week."

Polaris gritted her teeth "I meant clean from a legal stand point, Ms. McGonagall."

"You take that back, lassie. I have nothing to be ashamed of. There hasn't been a murder in two--, wait no... Well lets see. Since 1967 in June. That's nearly 28 years." Diane said

"Quite. We are well aware..."

"I don't have any skeletons in my cellar. Our lives are filled with soul sucking sorrow and deep guilt: misery and loneliness, creating the very picture of despair. What need is there for McGonagalls to kill each other, when this life is but a walking tomb... a living nightmare..."

"Could you stop her, Vesta? I really would like to finish this meeting tonight," Polaris hissed to Vesta.
"Nothing stops her," Vesta said woefully, lowering her head.

"Well seeing as you won't cooperate, I might inform you that the vision was of a woman, with red head with long hair," Polaris cut Diane off.

"Well then why can't you let Art go? Her hair has always been short."

"Yeah and everyone knows Minnie's been grey since she went Kitty," Art said clapping her arm around her little sis, in a gesture of solidarity. Minerva sighed. Only her big sissie would call joining the ranks of the great Animagi Masters and becoming the seventh animagus in a century "going Kitty."

"No. It is too risky. Professor McGonagall, please take off your hat and you hairpin. So we can see how grey your hair is."

"Of course, Auror. Black." Minerva pulled off her large green hat and set it aside. She took out her hairpin and fluffed out her hair. The long tabbyish strands of red hair were getting darker and not lighter with age. Something about being an animagus in a century fidgeted with her hair. Except for a slim unnatural white stripe on her bangs she appeared to have the same auburn hair as the rest.

"You see my problem."

"So Art couldn't have grown her hair so fast. Bambi, Vesta and I all have long hair and Diana's is white.

"Aye. And my hair has faded to the brink of death," Diane said bleakly as she pointed out her white curls, "I can show them if you want. Well what do you think, Miss Black?"

"Auror. Black. Please call me Auror. Black. The Aurors have not done kindly to your family. We lost your brother Adonis to He-who-must-not-be-named. He should have been our example, but we ignored the signs. We shall not do though this time, even if it does seem like paranoid folly."

The McGonagall sisters slowly returned to their seats, cowed by the Aurors great presence. Could it be that something really was going to happen? Could it be that Sirius Black was around?

Minerva looked around. She knew Sirius Black was free, and as Dumbledore and Harry Potter insisted, innocent of betraying the Potters. Rumours still circulated that he had killed Pettigrew out of vengeance. If he didn't kill Pettigrew, it was not for lack of trying. And with Harry alive, one did not need to understand much to realize that Sirius Black would not stay far away.

Perhaps it was reasonable that she would reveal his location, if only by accident. But that was equally ridiculous. How could she kill a person? It said very clearly that he would be killed and not discovered and or revealed.

But her own actions could alert her elder sister to his presence, and Vesta could kill if it were necessary, and she were so ordered. Perhaps Vesta had gleaned some bit of secret information from her sister... but they hadn't spoken in three years. Vesta had no idea that she had even seen Black. Minerva decided to calm her rampant paranoia.

"One of you knows where Sirius Black is, or through certain events in the next few days shall find out where he is."

"One of us?"

"This is ridiculous." Bambi snorted, I mean, knew Black up in school. Wicked ride. Flying Triumph motorbike. Big burly shoulders and Great little caboose ..."

"It's kind of silly. I haven't seen Black in 14 years, till I sent him to Azkaban and Minnie hasn't seen him since Hogwarts." Vesta said.

"That is right."

"1993, Hogwarts, Sirius Black made an unsuccessful attempt on Harry Potter's life. You were present. She's seen him more recently than any of us have." Polaris took a long cold look at Minerva McGonagall. She wondered if Polaris ever thought of a career in teaching. She could get the Weasley's to shape up and confess with those icy blue eyes.

"It's true." Minerva said.

"Why do we have to stay here? What about our lives? Just cause one of us is going to get him? What are we going to do anyway? We're just some witches." Bambi complained.

"We're just innocent witches, why aren't protecting us from him then. Why are we the ones on trial?" Minerva said

"The Cawdor Clause. Ministry Appointed Visions take top priority, so as they do not become Self-fulfilling prophecies. If someone's death is preordained in a prophecy, the Ministry is obligated to protect him

"It is like in The Scottish Play."

"Macbeth did not decide to murder the king until he heard the prophecy."

"There is someone who wants Sirius Black dead. And I fear who it may be. Sirius Black will be dealt with by the Ministry."

Black looked at them all.

"In protecting his life, we will hope to uncovering his crimes. Entrapping himself and sending him to justice. It cannot be done any other way. The Aurors will catch Black first."
"If one of you would be found looking for Black, you'd become an immediate accessory. What if one of you worked for the dark Lord and were conspiring with him? It would be easy to turn him in. Whoever does kill Black could be the most dangerous witch in England."

"Then why don't you just let Baby go," Vesta said.

"Oh har har har. Shut up?" Bambi snorted, a muted trumpet following her indignity. It seemed to fit.

"Minerva is the 7^thanimagus in the twentieth century, Vesta is a powerful figure in the ministry and an Auror. Even Art is exceptional in her flying abilities."

Polaris walked around. "And one of you will encounter Sirius Black and kill him."

"I guess we have to obey." Art said.

"It's the law." Polaris nodded.

"I'm with you, Pub." Vesta said. "I don't want Black to get anywhere near my sisters."

"Right." Minerva held Vesta's hand on her shoulder. Minerva looked up and smiled.

"I'm glad now we're all willing to cooperate." Polaris glared at Minerva. "No more lies, No more secrets. We'll find the truth soon enough."

"But not at Hogwarts. It's sooooo boring here." Bambi said.

"That's because the Potions master won't sleep with you," Vesta said.

Bambi sneered at Minerva and Vesta. "It runs in the family."

"Baby," Art said. "You're not allowed to talk about him."

"Him who? Voldemort or Harry Potter... or maybe Severus Snape?"

"Shut up!" Vesta said. "You're not so old I can't break your jaw ."

"Bambi." Minerva said.

"You gels pipe down. Hogwarts's plenty good enough for the likes of us. Stop being so selfish, girl. And stop yer nonsense, Vesta. Why do I always have to be the mother? You just better get used to it. I won't be around forever..."

When all was said and done the McGonagall's went off to their own rooms. Vesta waited until Minerva left and followed each other out of the staff room.

"I can't believe Bambi said that about Severus. If he found out the kind of things she said, well, I wouldn't touch any of Bambi's food."

"Can you believe her?" Vesta said.

"She has no right to judge us in our personal lives. We've never been caught in carnal embrace with a stinking Death Eater." Minerva said.

"Well..." Vesta sighed, "At least not one who was her teacher... And not even one of the cute teachers."

"Teachers are not cute," Minerva said.

"I guess you would know. You were the cute teacher," Vesta nodded, "I heard all the boys making the most inappropriate comments about you after Transfiguration."

"You don't say."

"Oh yes. I had to do a lot of eavesdropping. Very vulgar, very juvenile. You should have heard their nicknames."

"Oh, what?"

"You were hot stuff. Foxy babe. I heard them call you...." Vesta whispered in her ear.

"Really?" Minerva laughed. "No."

"Yeah. Imagine me, a poor gawky teenager with this amazing famous babe sister."

"Gawky Teenager? Vesta, you didn't take any blows to the head recently, did you? All the Slytherins wanted to date you," Minerva said.

"Not me."

"Patrick Parkenson tried to ask you out after every single Transfiguration class."

"Cor, really?" Vesta blushed.

"I'm too tall. You were petite and cute. I couldn't compete."

"Look now. You still got your figure. You were gorgeous, like a runway model."

Minerva rolled her eyes, "You have no idea what you are talking about, Vesta."

The two women began to chuckle at each other.

"You know, just because I want you alive doesn't mean I have to talk to ya." Vesta said. "But well, we might as well."

"Fine," Minerva said frowning.

Vesta blew up her hair, not wanting to say any word of apology or motion or contrition until she had too.

"Minnie," she said, exasperated.

"Sis." Minerva uncrossed her arms.

Vesta punched her in the arm. Minerva paused, holding her wound, and then rubbed the top of Vesta's head fiercely. It did pay to be the bigger sister.

They both smiled simultaneously.

That night they walked down opposite halls, once again speaking.

"It's not the time of year for thinking," Remus said, laid out in the pool house bedroom. He hadn't put a stitch of clothing for about 7 hours now.

Alejandro shifted next to him. "Remus?"

"Wait, wait... Here"

"Next time I'll bring you more," Remus said. "Just work on it, mi Querido."

He kissed him.

"Ugh."

"MI corazon. MI dulce."

"My sweet. Ugh."

"Moony." He licked the shell of his ear.

There was something so tender and mournful about that old name. Remus looked up painfully and stroked his lover's face.

"The moon's coming soon."

"Let the moon come then. I'll eat the moon. You are the one I want. All of you, everything in you." He stroked the blush scar over his right pectoral. "You make a lovely wolf."

"I'm a monster."

Alejandro shook his head, "If it is you. It will be lovely."

Remus rested his head in his embrace. Remus touched his soft hair, how different it felt from the other hair. Sirius Black was well known for his gorgeous black ponytail, his blue black shimmering tresses, like silken petals. This time the hair was rougher, and red tinted. There were other differences. For example the mustache. Remus loved the mustache against his skin. He was ashamed that he had never tried to kiss anyone with a mustache, but such was the case. He would have to make up for his oh-so-very-chaste past.

"You know, Lukas said I look like a were coyote with delusions of grandeur."

"Really?" Alejandro asked.

"Of course, that was after I called him a complete head case."

"Lukas is a very strange young man. I think he is loco in de cabesa."

"I'm not the only one, I guess. I want to thank you." Remus smiled.

"What for did I do?" Alejandro said.

"For being a good liar." Remus tweaked his nose.

"I believe it. Does that count?"

"No, silly boy...." Remus kissed him, their bodies twining together in a soft embrace, Alejandro petting his hair.

"It's such a lovely night."