Illusions

Illusions

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Birthdays Stink

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"You can't be serious." Draco stared at his Potions professor in disbelief. He did not believe what he'd just heard.

"Oh, but I indeed am," replied Severus, raising his eyebrow. "Why would you think that I am joking? I think I presented you a rather clear order."

"But -- but it's Longbottom we're talking about here!" exclaimed Draco in desperation. His Godfather couldn't seriously be going to do this, could he? "The most incompetent of Gryffindors! He's worse than any Hufflepuff you might find!"

"Exactly," Severus replied smoothly. "Neville Longbottom is indeed the most dreadful student I've ever had the displeasure of teaching. However, he has somehow managed to pass his OWLs -- by what miracle, I have no idea -- and I am determined not to let him fail this course. However, as I don't have time to waste to giving him the tutoring he obviously needs to pass the course, it's up to you to tutor him properly."

"But why me?" whined the younger Slytherin. "Why not -- why not Granger? I'm sure she'd be delighted to help."

"I'm sure she would," said Severus dryly. "However, she's not going to tutor Longbottom -- you are. And that's because of two reasons. One, you are the best student in any of my Potions classes, even better than Granger. Well, maybe there would be one or two even better than you on the seventh year, but they have enough problems with NEWTs coming. Two, you broke a record yesterday."

"What record?" asked Draco without really wanting to know, only because it was expected of him. It could be nothing good, that much he knew already.

"Three hundred," said his Head of House, then elaborated, "exactly three hundred fights with Potter. I'm ashamed of you, Draco, and tired of dealing with you -- even more tired than I am of dealing with Longbottom's incompetence. Therefore, you are going to tutor him, and I get two birds with one stone."

"Fabulous," muttered Draco. Things were truly not looking up today. His birthday present from his parents -- he'd asked for a new racing broom -- hadn't arrived yet, and they'd got loads of homework, all of which he'd have to do late at night, if Severus really was going to make him waste his evening tutoring the most incompetent Gryffindor ever. Really, what kind of a person would purposefully spoil his Godson's birthday that way?

...Well, Severus's kind, probably.

"Off you go," said Severus with a self-satisfied smirk. "I do believe Mr. Longbottom is already waiting for you in the Potions classroom."

"Fine," sighed Draco in quiet resignation. He knew it would not be of use to try to argue with his Godfather.

"Oh, and before I forget," Severus said calmly just as Draco had slowly made his way to the door of the office. "Happy birthday. You can open it on your way to the classroom." The older Slytherin tossed him a small package, and Draco caught it with the skill of a Seeker.

Before he even realized it, Draco was walking along the corridor towards the Potions classroom, the package in his hands. There was a foul scent in the air, and he was quite sure it came from his "present". Slightly fearing what he might find inside -- knowing Severus's sense of humour, it could be anything from a half-rotten rat corpse to a pile of a dragon's shit -- Draco carefully tore the Slytherin green wrapping away. Then he opened the box he found inside, all the time ready to flee from whatever he would see.

To his great surprise, the source of the smell was a little snake. It was in fact cute, shining in all his silvery glory in the bottom of the tiny wooden box. There was also a slip of parchment, one which Draco picked up.

"Draco," it read, "happy sixteenth birthday. This little thing is a stinksnake. They are very affectionate about their masters, and extremely protective -- not to mention their poison has some interesting effects. As they later grow wings, they make great protectors. However, the smell cannot be got rid of, and it lasts for all of their first year. Please also note that most people cannot even see him, so unless you want to be taken to the closed ward of St. Mungo's, don't have too much interaction with your new pet in public. He eats salad and milk, and no, I do not know how they can produce such a smell with that diet. --Severus"

"So you are a stinksnake, eh?" asked he with a mild interest. The snake didn't reply, just watched him with wide, baby-blue eyes. "I think I'm going to call you Stinky, as the name will surely suit you." Again, the snake stayed unresponsive.

Sighing, Draco poked the snake with his finger, oblivious to the warnings about it being poisonous -- Severus wouldn't give him anything deadly, as Lucius would kill him after that. And, after all, he was the snake's new master, wasn't he? And truly, the snake didn't bite him. Instead, Stinky suddenly raised himself from the bottom of the tiny box and wrapped his tiny body around Draco's wrist. Sighing again, knowing that there was no getting rid of the snake, Draco stuffed both the box and the wrappers deep into his pocket, then started to walk the rest of the way to his soon-coming doom.

As he pushed the door to the Potions classroom open, the boy who already was there yelped in fright and jumped about two feet to the air. "Calm down, Longbottom," Draco snapped dryly. Really, how pathetic a person get, even a Gryffindor? "However much I'd like to kill you and feed you to the school owls in tiny pieces just to see the expressions on the Gryffindors' faces when an owl shits a finger bone on their table, unfortunately, I cannot do that without getting Professor Snape at my neck. So, I think we have some tutoring to do."

Longbottom nodded mutely, his eyes wide with fear. Then the boy actually managed to stutter, "Pr-Professor Snape left s-some instructions on his desk." A shaking finger pointed at the teacher's desk.

With a longsuffering sigh, Draco walked to the desk, and took the piece of parchment lying there. He quickly read the instructions -- which only contained the name of the potion they had to make, and a little afternote about not killing the Gryffindor -- then turned towards Longbottom. The plump brunet startled and took a step backwards. "At first, you need to get these ingredients from the student cupboard," he said with a forcedly calm tone, pointing at the Potions book that was open on the desk. Handing the book then to the other boy, he said slowly, like speaking to a very simple kid, "I am going to put the cauldron ready. Can I trust you not to mistake Venderroot to Vendairoot?"

Longbottom nodded, and a little hint of surety flickered in his blue eyes. Oh, yes. For all Draco knew, the boy's only decent grade was in Herbology. The boy really knew herbs and plants of all kinds -- and that was all good there was to be said about him.

Suddenly Longbottom's voice startled him. "M-Malfoy?" asked the other boy carefully. "Why exactly do you have a snake around your wrist?"

After getting over his first surprise about the fact that the boy had actually spoken -- what a miracle, truly! -- Draco glanced down at Stinky, who watched him back with his baby-blue eyes. "Oh, he's my pet," he said, trying to manage a careless tone. "I got him from Professor Snape -- he's my Godfather."

"Why'd he give you such a thing?" inquired Longbottom. He still looked very wary and a bit scared, but obviously the fact the Draco hadn't hexed him -- at least not yet -- had allowed him to actually speak.

"Because it's my birthday today," snapped Draco irritably. "So, please get to work. I want this done as soon as possible, so tutoring you won't ruin my whole birthday."

"Oh." Longbottom was quiet for a long time. Then he said very quietly, "I -- I am sorry. For spoiling your birthday, that is."

"No need to be," said Draco. "The only one I blame for this is my dear Godfather. Now, get to the work before I have to speed you up!" he then snapped as the Gryffindor seemed to be frozen on his place.

Longbottom did so, still in a slight daze. Draco sighed again as he started to gather the needed tools around the one cauldron that was in the classroom. 'One day,' he vowed quietly to himself, 'one day, Severus will pay for this.'