The Moon's White Face

The Moon's White Face

By Cindale

Chapter 2

"We've knelt before the Moon's white face,

While around us whirred Night's purple wings."

From "Transformation" by J. Corson Miller

Sunday, 12 September 1971

1:22 PM

Sirius kept trying to talk to me today and I finally decided I'd better quit ignoring him or he might start doing pranks on me, too. He didn't really apologize - just said he didn't mean to get my essay wet and that he would help me write another one. I told him he almost called Lily a Mudblood. He didn't apologize for that either - just said that he knew he'd better be careful not to say it now that he was in Gryffindor. I told him it hurt Lily's feelings and he should apologize to her, but he just laughed and asked me if I fancy her. That made me mad so I came upstairs.

I hope Sirius isn't one of those people who thinks he's better than Muggle-borns like his cousin Narcissa does. He knows my dad was a Muggle and he doesn't seem to mind that. He also seems to like Peter okay, and I think he's Muggle-born. But he doesn't like James at all, and James is a pure-blood. So maybe he's okay. Or maybe he just wants to be friends with people that he thinks are inferior so he can be the boss or something.

This blood stuff is all really stupid. Last summer, Mum and Renoir were talking about this bloke who's trying to get people to hate all Muggle-borns. They seemed a little scared that some of the old pure-blood families were listening to him. I think it's stupid for people to hate them. Lily and Peter are really nice, and Lily knew how to do a drying charm when Sirius didn't.

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Monday, 13 September 1971

7:37 PM

This morning on the way to Astronomy, James wrote "kick me" on a piece of parchment and charmed it to stick to the back of Sirius's robes. It was kind of funny until a group of bigger boys came along and really kicked him hard. I was afraid they were really going to hurt him. But then the Head Boy (his name is Lucius) stopped them and took away house points from them and some of the other kids who were only laughing.

Peter and I helped Sirius stand up. Lucius looked at Peter and me really weird and then gave Sirius a different look, like he was a bit angry. He said, "You are Narcissa Black's cousin." Sirius nodded, and Lucius said, "Don't ever let those with inferior blood humiliate you again!" Lucius looked at Peter and me again, and this time I realized he was looking at us like we were something nasty on the bottom of his shoe. After Lucius walked away, Sirius shook his arms to get Peter and I to let go of him and walked to class. He looked like he was trying not to limp. I don't think I like the Head Boy.

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Thursday, 16 September 1971

9:18 PM

I think Lily's been avoiding me - probably because Sirius is always sitting with me. I finally got a chance to talk to her today during flying since Sirius was busy trying to fly better than James. I told her I was sorry he said that and that I think Muggle-borns are as good as anyone and that my mum taught me Mudblood was a bad word. She asked me why I hang around with Sirius. I said that really he hangs around me, but that he's not so bad, and he treats Peter okay even though he's Muggle-born. She sat with me at dinner, so she must not be mad at me. I'm glad, because I like her a lot better than Sirius.

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Saturday, 18 September 1971

3:37 PM

James's hair is green! Sirius says it's Slytherin green. Sirius put something in his pumpkin juice at lunch to turn his hair green. He said it would only last a few hours, but today was Quidditch tryouts. James spent about an hour after lunch trying to change his hair back. He actually set it on fire once, but he put it out before much burnt off. I found out that burning hair smells really bad!

Anyway, James finally gave up and went to Quidditch tryouts with green hair. I asked him if he was afraid the Gryffindor captain would think he was supporting Slytherin, but he only grinned and said she would only care how good he could fly - not what colour his hair was.

I went to watch. The captain seemed surprised that a first year was bothering to try out, but she didn't say anything about his hair. James didn't make the team. He was a little disappointed, but he said he'd keep practicing and he'd make it next year. The Seeker they have is really good. She's a sixth year, so James will have to practice really hard to beat her next year.

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Wednesday, 22 September 1971

7:04 PM

Just a little while ago, Sirius and I were sitting here in the common room studying, and Lily asked me if she could talk to me privately. Sirius snickered and winked at me which made me mad, but I went anyway.

We went outside the portrait hole and Lily asked me if Sirius really fancies Lauren (one of her roommates). I told her I didn't know - he never talks about girls. (That's not exactly true - sometimes he teases me about Lily, but I didn't tell her that.) She said Lauren got a note from Sirius that said he loves her. She said if it's not true then it's a really mean prank because Lauren thinks Sirius is cute. Lily said she didn't know why - she thinks Sirius looks like a mangy cur with his long black hair. I thought that was funny.

I asked Lily why Lauren didn't just ask Sirius about the note. She said Lauren is very shy. (Now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever heard Lauren speak.) Lily asked me if I would ask Sirius about it. I thought she should ask him herself, but I didn't say so. I think girls are really strange.

Sirius was grinning really big when I came back into the common room. He asked if Lily kissed me. That made me embarrassed, and I think my face turned red. But then I told him I should be teasing him about Lauren.

He said, "Lauren who?"

I said, "The one you sent a note to."

He looked really confused, so I don't think he did it. I wrote Lily a note that told her so, and charmed it to fly over to where she was sitting.

Sirius looked like he was thinking really hard. Then he said, "Potter," and ran up to the dormitory. Peter came down a minute later looking scared. I think if the shouts and banging get much louder the prefects will have to go up there. I hope they knock some sense into each other this time - their fighting is so stupid. I hope they don't break any of my stuff, but I'm waiting at least another hour before I go upstairs.

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Thursday, 23 September 1971

9:23 PM

It turns out that it was James who sent the love note to Lauren, signing Sirius's name. I think it was really mean of him - these pranks are starting to hurt other people besides James and Sirius.

Lily really yelled at James today after flying lessons. It's a good thing we were outside. She said that prank was really mean to Lauren instead of to Sirius, and that she wished they would either stop the pranks or kill each other.

I think they came pretty close to killing each other last night. Ajit Patil and another prefect finally dragged them both down the stairs and took them to the hospital wing. I didn't hear them come in last night, but they were both at breakfast, and glaring at each other even more than normal.

I wonder why they keep fighting. I talked to Lily about it. She really shocked me when she said they were both trying to be the Alpha, like in a wolf pack. She said she really likes wolves and has read a lot about them. For a minute I was really scared - I thought maybe she knew. But she couldn't know, could she? I hope she never finds out - I couldn't stand it if she hated me.

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Wednesday, 29 September 1971

8:47 PM

I can't believe it's been almost a week since I've written in here. I've been so busy, and really not much exciting has happened.

Defence Against the Dark Arts is still my favourite class. There's this Slytherin boy called Severus in there who always knows the answers. He sounds like he thinks he's better than everyone else when he talks. Yesterday I saw him walking down the corridor with Lucius Malfoy and they both looked at me like I was a bug they wanted to squash. I know it would be better if I got along with everyone in my year, but I'm not sure if I like Severus. I'm glad he's not in Gryffindor - Sirius and James are bad enough.

Speaking of them, they haven't done any more pranks, but I'm not getting my hopes up. They still glare at each other and don't talk to each other. I think they're both planning something really bad for the other. I'm just glad neither of them has told me anything about it.

I spend as much time as I can with Peter and Lily and away from Sirius and James. Peter is okay, but he doesn't talk much. I found out Lily loves to read as much as I do. She loaned me a book called The Fellowship of the Ring. My father had The Hobbit, and I loved it, but I didn't know Tolkien had written more books. I think I like Frodo even better than Bilbo.

Well, I'll quit before this entry gets too boring. Not that anyone will be reading this, but still.

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Friday, 1 October 1971

7:01 PM

I can't believe what happened today! This is the worst one yet! I can't believe Sirius went this far!

In Potions, I was sitting with Sirius and James was sitting with Peter. Sirius leaned across me when no one was looking and put extra dried nettles in James's Forgetfulness Potion. I saw him do it, but I don't think anyone else did. I couldn't believe he would go that far with the pranks! I wondered if I should tell the teacher, but I really want to get good marks, and I'm afraid of what Sirius might do to me if he gets mad. I mean, look what he did to James!

I didn't really feel like eating lunch, so I went straight to the library after Potions to read the book Lily loaned me. James found me after lunchtime, and I was glad we were in the library, because he looked like he wanted to yell at me. He said his potion was the wrong colour, and Professor Biber told him he put in too many dried nettles. He said he knew he didn't make a mistake with that potion and that Sirius must have sabotaged it. I didn't know what to say. I was afraid if I told him what I saw that Sirius would get very mad at me. James seemed to know that Sirius did it and that I saw it, and he was really mad at me for keeping quiet.

I told James that I'm getting really tired of being caught in the middle of their pranks and fighting. He said that I need to choose sides, and asked me if I want to be friends with him or Sirius. I said that it's not fair to make me choose and that I want to be friends with both. He said if I wouldn't choose he would choose for me, and stomped off.

I'd rather be friends with James after what Sirius did, but I don't think I'd like being Sirius's enemy, so I didn't tell James that. But I'm not sure what I'm going to do now, because it looks like James doesn't want to be my friend any more.

I wonder if it's too late to ask Dumbledore if I can be switched to Ravenclaw. Or maybe he would let me sleep in the girl's dormitory.

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Saturday, 2 October 1971

11:03 AM

I've been so worried about James and Sirius that I completely forgot that the Full Moon is Monday! I really need to make up a story that will last the whole year. Mum said I should tell them she's sick and has to have treatments every four weeks, and I have to go and help her because she's so weak after. That sounds kind of lame to me - I'm afraid the other boys will think I just miss my mum. I guess I'll try it if I don't think of anything better.

This morning at breakfast Sirius got a letter from his mum. It was plain that it made him angry, and I was curious, but didn't dare ask him about it. Kinesha wasn't afraid to ask him, though. She doesn't seem to be afraid of anything. Of course, her family is pure-blood and I guess she thinks her older brother will hex anyone who isn't nice to her.

Sirius cursed his family for a bit, and then he explained that his parents were very angry that he got into Gryffindor. They heard that he was making friends with the half-bloods and Muggle-borns instead of the pure-bloods, and they told him they would bring him home if he didn't stop hanging around with kids with "inferior blood".

I couldn't help thinking how much easier everything would be if Sirius went home, but then I felt guilty for thinking that as soon as Sirius spoke again. He said that his parents could go to hell and that Peter and I were his mates, no matter what they said. He said he didn't care about blood at all, and that he could bloody well be friends with whoever he wanted. He said all that pretty loudly which was a little embarrassing. I looked around and saw James listening, but I couldn't tell what he was thinking by his expression. I wonder what Sirius's parents would say if they knew one of his friends was a werewolf.

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Sunday, 3 October 1971

9:37 PM

I got a letter from Mum today, which made me really miss her. I wish I was really going to see her tomorrow.

I told Sirius, Peter, and Lily that I have to go help my mother with her treatment tomorrow. I hope the letter made it easier to believe - I think that's why she sent it. Lily asked me a lot of questions about my mum's disease. I told her it was really rare and I didn't understand much about it, but that she has a treatment about every four weeks and someone has to help her because she's so weak after. An older girl named Bertha heard us talking and said that she never heard of anyone getting to leave school every month before. I said that Dumbledore was new this year so maybe he was going to be different about things like that. Then Peter spoke up very quietly and asked why my sister didn't stay with my mum. I panicked for a moment because I hadn't thought of that, but I finally managed to make up some excuse about her job being too demanding, and the goblins wouldn't let her take time off.

James finally spoke to me again today. When I was studying alone in the common room he came over and said he was sorry about my mum (I guess stories like that travel fast). Then he sat down and studied with me for awhile. I guess he's not mad any more. I'm glad.

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Wednesday, 6 October 1971

6:11 PM

Well, I made it through my second Full Moon. I had to miss two days of classes this time, though. Madam Pomfrey let me come back to the dormitory tonight if I said I would go to bed early, but I've been mostly sleeping for two days and I think I've had enough. I think I'm going to go to Astronomy tonight - I've missed enough classes. I can skip breakfast tomorrow morning and sleep through my free period. I hope Madam Pomfrey doesn't find out and get mad at me - she's been so nice. But I've been dealing with this for four years now and I know when I'm too tired or not too tired. (I'm lying in my bed right now - maybe that counts as going to bed early - I never said I wouldn't get up later.)

I broke one of my ribs this time, and it's a little sore. I wonder how I did it - I must have fallen on top of something. At least it's easy to hide from the others - not like last month when I hurt my leg and had to try not to limp.

I was really scared and sad when I saw the inside of the house. Last month when I got there it was all neat and clean like it was waiting for someone to live there, but I didn't see it when I left because I was unconscious. But now a lot of things are broken and there's claw marks everywhere. I guess it looks like a werewolf went crazy in there. I apologized to Madam Pomfrey but she just said not to worry - the house was made for me after all. But I still felt bad.

When I was at home I transformed in a metal shed in the garden. Mum kept it locked up when it wasn't the Full Moon, but one time I took the key and looked inside. There were a few dents in the walls but it didn't look so bad. I never knew how much damage I could do. Dumbledore really should have given me a cave or something to change in. I feel really bad about tearing up that house, especially since I know I'll mess it up a little more every month. I guess I really am a monster.

The other boys will be back from dinner soon. I asked James to write down the assignments for me since Sirius and Peter forget things a lot. I wonder if James and Sirius have done any more pranks or had any more fights. I hope not.

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Thursday 7 October 1971

8:45 PM

I had a note from Madam Pomfrey that I couldn't fly today because of my rib that's still sore. I wanted to try it anyway, but I figured I had already pushed my luck going to Astronomy last night. So I gave the note to Madam Hooch before the other kids got there and went to the dormitory. I was hoping I wouldn't get any questions about it, but I should have known Lily would ask.

I explained to her that I fell at my house and bruised my chest. She asked how, and I told her I'm just very clumsy - I get hurt a lot. She gave me a funny look, but didn't ask any more about it, thank goodness.

I'm going to have to work very hard this weekend to catch up on all my homework. Too bad - I really wanted to find out what Frodo and Sam have been doing while Aragorn and the others were fighting in Rohan. I guess I'll have to finish The Two Towers next week.

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Thursday, 14 October 1971

6:59 PM

I can't believe James did it! I thought Sirius's potions prank was bad, but this one really took a lot of nerve.

We had a really long Transfiguration essay due today. As soon as Sirius gave his to Professor McGonagall, it started singing! Yes, singing! I couldn't believe it! I know the song because Dad had an old Victrola and used to play a recording of Frank Sinatra singing it. Let's see if I can remember the words.

I'm in the mood for love

Simply because you're near me.

Funny but when you're near me,

I'm in the mood for love.

Heaven -------

Bright as the stars ------

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I'm in the mood for love.

Well, I guess I can remember some of the words, but not most of them.

Anyway, I've never seen Professor McGonagall so mad. Her face turned red and she couldn't even speak for a minute. She finally told him to make it stop, but he said he didn't know how. Somehow she knew to look at James. The whole class was laughing, but he was laughing harder than anyone. She gave James and Sirius both detention. James didn't even bother to deny doing it - I think he was sort of proud of it. It was a good bit of magic, actually.

Sirius was really mad - he said he didn't do anything wrong. She said she didn't care - she'd had enough of the pranks. Tomorrow night they have to clean all the bedpans and scrub the floor in the hospital wing without magic. It's a good thing they'll be in the hospital wing - maybe Madam Pomfrey can get to them before they kill each other.