Swept From the Past

Chapter 31: Difficult Choices -- part one

The following day, Harry was in the Great Hall for lunch, when Dumbledore stood up to make an announcement.

"Your attention please," Dumbledore said. He paused. "It gives me great pleasure to announce that we will hold a Spring Ball at the end of March."

A Spring Ball? Like in fourth year?

Great agitation filled the Great Hall. Dumbledore motioned for the students to be silent.

"The Ball is open to all students fourth year and higher," Dumbledore continued. Groans of disappointment were heard. "Silence please," The Headmaster said. The students quieted down. "A younger student may attend only if escorted by a student from a higher year. Further details will be provided at a later date. Now that you know the good news, you may find yourself a partner."

Dumbledore stopped talking and sat, which meant his speech was finished.

"Oh no," Ron moaned. "Not another Ball!"

Harry was not pleased either. Inviting a girl to a Ball was something he really disliked. It was a very awkward situation. He didn't even know who to invite!

"Be positive," Ginny said. "You'll probably be dead by the Spring Ball. You'll have to survive Professor Burns' detention first."

"Thanks, Ginny," Ron replied. He scowled. "I feel better now."

"Do you think that my mysterious Venetian blond-haired man will come to the Ball?" Ginny asked Hermione. "If only he would invite me!" She continued dreamily.

"You're really obsessed with him!" Ron commented. "He doesn't even know that you exist!"

Ginny glared at Ron.

"Er," Neville said, interrupting Ron and Ginny's quarrel. "Do you think Luna would go with me? I think I'll ask her after lunch. If I wait too long, someone else will ask first."

Harry couldn't prevent himself from thinking that it wasn't true. Even if he liked Luna, he knew that most of the boys in the school found her strange. It was unlikely that she'd find a date.

"Good idea," Harry replied. "Ask her."

"I'm sure that she'll agree," Hermione added.

Neville smiled. He looked more confident. "Do you know who you'll invite, Harry?" he asked.

"I don't know," Harry replied. "Dumbledore just made the announcement..."

"Ginny says that Jonas Steen broke up with Cho," Ron said, looking at Harry. "Want to invite her?"

Harry felt the colour rising on his face and stared at his plate. "Hmmm... no," he grumbled. Cho was ancient history, but thinking of her made Harry ill at ease. It seemed strange to speak about her with his friends looking at him.

"Why?" Ron asked. "You'd have a partner for that stupid Ball."

"Oh, can't you shut up, Ron?" Hermione replied.

"What's up with y--?" Ron queried.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Don't you see that Harry doesn't want to talk about it?" she interrupted. "If he says he doesn't want to invite Cho, it's not your problem! Don't you think before you speak?"

"It's all right, Hermione," Harry said. He turned to Ron. "It's just that... I'll think about that later. But I'd like to invite someone else. Don't know who yet."

"And who'll you invite, Ron?" Ginny asked sharply.

"Dunno," Ron replied shortly. He took a mouthful of potatoes. Did his ears just redden?

"Why not Padma or Parvati?" Neville suggested.

Ron shook his head and emitted a grunt. Harry remembered their previous Ball. Harry wouldn't invite one of the twins either. He didn't want to, and they wouldn't accept anyway. Harry sighed. Why did he have to invite a girl to the Spring Ball? He had so many other things to think of!

***

Severus Snape paced back and forth in front of Professor Burns' office. He couldn't make the move to knock and enter. He felt like a fifth year student about to ask a girl for a date. His throat was dry and his hands were moist. Asking Burns to the Ball was like jumping from a cliff. It was suicidal. And even if he survived, it was going to hurt. Severus was about to leave, when the door opened. A man came out of the office.

Severus' eyes flashed. What was a tall, muscular, and handsome man doing in Burns' office? The Potions master's teeth clenched. And what was that... sort of orange hair colour? Severus snorted.

"Can I help you?" the man asked.

"Who are you?" Severus hissed.

The man raised an eyebrow. "I'm not authorised to tell you."

"What are you doing here?" Severus snapped.

"Closing the door," the man replied. He shut the door at the same time and cast a spell.

Severus frowned. "Where is Professor Burns?" he asked.

"The Capt'n is not in her office," the man responded. "And she's busy for the moment. She doesn't want to be bothered with unpleasant visitors."

How dare that insufferable man speak to him that way? "Do you have any idea who you are addressing?" Severus replied sharply. "I am Professor Severus Snape, Potions master at this school. I demand to know your name and what business you have in Professor Burns' office."

"Oh," the man replied. He sneered and took a piece of parchment from his robes. "Will your Eminence the Potions Master excuse me and have a look at this note?"

Your Eminence? Severus glared at the man. 'Arrogant, little bastard!' he thought. 'I have the perfect potion for you. It can wipe that perfect smile right off your face and make you drool instead. Permanently.' Severus and snatched the parchment from the man's hands. He read:

"I, Professor Burns, certify that my second-in-command, Alphonso Davis, is allowed to enter my office. Mr. Davis agreed to sign a pact which allows him access to my office under my orders. Everything is magically controlled and certified by the Ministry of Magic."

Severus arched an eyebrow and scowled. Her second-in-command?

"Second-in-command?" he asked. "Another name for server?" He smirked.

"Indeed," Davis replied. "My role is to serve the Capt'n's desires." He sneered again.

Severus' eyes flew open and his teeth clenched. What was between Burns and that bloody git? 'She's mine,' the Potions master replied in his head. 'Do not ever touch her or I'll make you regret it! I'll kill you!' Suddenly, Severus calmed his anger and reasoned with himself. Burns couldn't have had an affair with that prat. If they had had any physical contact, she wouldn't be so ill. The bastard was bluffing.

"I see..." Severus said. "You're the next generation of house-elves," he replied mockingly. He turned to leave.

"Hmmm..." Davis said, "Severus Snape... Any relation to Claudius Snape?"

Severus turned back. Why the hell did that git ask him that? "He was my father," Severus replied.

Davis looked puzzled.

"What?" Severus snapped.

"I'm surprised that the Capt'n didn't kill you," Davis said. "She hates all the Death Eaters' families. Claudius Snape's particularly."

Severus didn't expect that answer. He stopped breathing for a few seconds. How did that git know that?

"Who says that I come from a line of Death Eaters?" Severus replied furiously.

The bastard smirked. "Just an idea," he replied ironically. "But you shouldn't bother the Capt'n too much. She usually doesn't kill humans, but she could make an exception. You're lucky your father's already dead. She'd have taken care of him otherwise. But who could blame her, eh?"

Davis had crossed the line. Severus suddenly pointed his wand at the git. He had heard enough. A little Stupefying Charm would teach that cretin to show more respect. "Stu--" Severus shouted.

"I wouldn't do it if I were you," Davis interrupted.

Severus raised an eyebrow. "And why not?" he asked.

"Well," Davis continued, "The Capt'n may not like it. Her second-in-command hexed while he's doing his job? Not a good idea. She'll probably be furious."

Severus hesitated. It was so tempting to hex that conceited prat. But he had to consider the consequences. Burns was already furious with him. No need to worsen the situation.

He lowered his wand, turned away with regret, his robes whirling around him, and left. How close was that awful prat to Burns? How dare he give his opinion on Severus' family? Even if it was true. And how much did he know about Severus' father?

Severus had come to hate Claudius Snape, although he had really admired him when he was young. Why had he followed his advice? Why had he joined the Dark Lord? Severus remembered the day he had made that decision. The day his father had died...

***

Snape Manor, July, after Severus' seventh year.

Severus entered his father's bedroom in Snape Manor. Claudius Snape lay in his bed. He looked like a ghost. Sweat beaded on his forehead. He breathed hard.

Severus went to the bed.

"Father," he said.

His father opened his eyes with effort.

"S... everus," he whispered.

"I have just been told of your illness," Severus said. His father had fallen ill so suddenly that he had hardly believed the report. But now that he was here, he knew. His father was dying.

"I... have many enemies," Claudius Snape murmured. "Even... in this house."

In this house? Severus immediately thought of his mother. Yes, she could have poisoned his father. She had skills in Potions. And Claudius Snape had always underestimated Agrippina. Although Mrs. Snape never appeared to be around, Severus knew she frequently spied on him and his father. One day, Severus caught their house-elf, Freaky, stealing a potions sample that his father had made. Claudius Snape had probably never known how much he had taught Agrippina about Potions.

"I... have... little time." Claudius Snape whispered.

"Father--" Severus said.

"Join the Dark Lord," Claudius Snape interrupted. "This is... my last wish. Follow... the way to greatness. Make me be proud of you..." Claudius Snape's eyes shut for the last time. His breathing stopped.

Severus stared at his dead father. Severus didn't move. He was shocked. Claudius Snape was dead, taking away Severus' last illusions. His father had been devoted to the Dark Lord until his last second of life. He could have used his last moment to show Severus that he cared for him. But Claudius Snape's dying wish was that his son would be a Death Eater. That was all.

Severus sat on a chair to think. It was time now. If he wanted his father to be proud of him, he had to wear the Dark Mark on his arm. It was time for greatness. Time for him to be respected by everyone and to join the Dark Lord's cause. To do something important.

***

'To do something important,' Severus Snape thought with resentment. Yes, he had done something important. So important that it had changed his whole life. He had been burdened with an awful mark that he was forced to hide. It was impossible to roll up his sleeves in front of another person... or... to remove his clothes... Impossible to have a normal life...

That Dark Mark ritual had been an awful experience. The ceremony had looked like the previous one. Except that it was not a test anymore. Severus had knelt down in front of the Dark Lord. Then the Dark Lord had looked into his eyes. Fortunately, Severus' father had taught him how to practise Occlumency when he was young. So Severus had hidden his feelings of love for Katarina, and the Dark Lord had put his mark on his arm. But unlike the first ceremony, the pain on his left arm hadn't stopped. It had lasted for hours, and it started again and again each time the Dark Lord called for his servants...

***

Hogwarts, middle of July, after Severus' seventh year.

Severus lay on his bed in the Hogwarts dungeons. His eyes were closed from pain. He was curled up on himself, his left arm placed under his chest. His burning skin hurt like hell. Earlier in the day, he had undergone the last step of the ritual to become a servant of the Dark Lord. Now, he wore the Dark Mark on his arm, the symbol of his allegiance. He was a Death Eater. He had fulfilled his father's deathbed wish.

Severus felt proud. The Dark Lord had honoured him by allowing him to become one of his servants. Since that moment, Severus had suffered a lot. The pain hadn't decreased. Severus felt nauseous. Blood pulsed in his temples. He knew he should have prepared an Anti-Migraine Potion before going to the ceremony! Now it was too late. He was too sick to stand up; he was too sick to move. And the burning sensation intensified, as if his left arm was devoured by thousands of bugs... as if his arm had been amputated. It was so unbearable that Severus sobbed from pain.

Sacrifices. That was what his father had always told him. He should make sacrifices. That was the price for fighting against those Mudbloods! To preserve the pure-blood line! To force the world to show proper respect to the Dark Lord! Sacrifices... That's what Severus repeated in his mind.

An owl entered the window and dropped a letter on the bed beside Severus. He picked it up. He opened it with effort, using his right hand only. His eyes half-opened, he tried to read the letter:

"My dear Severus,

I am really sorry for your father. I know what you're going through, and I understand that you want to be alone. But don't hesitate to Owl me if you need to. I would come immediately. I love you with all my heart, and I keep thinking of you.

Kisses.

Your Kat."

Severus would have smiled if he hadn't been in so much pain. Katarina's letter gave him strength. He would have given anything for her to be at his side at that very moment. Her sweet touch on his face... but he couldn't ask her to come.

She was his mission, and she shouldn't know he was a Death Eater. She wanted to become an Auror. Soon, when Katarina graduated, Severus would have to spy on her, to give information to the Dark Lord. All that he would get from her, about the other Aurors and their missions! Maybe Katarina would turn to the Dark Lord's side? If only she could understand how important his quest was! Severus would try to convince her. Later. He would make her drink potions, if it was necessary, but she would join the Dark Lord. She would work for him, spy for him. And the Dark Lord would spare her. That was the only way for Severus and her to be together.

***

The Potions master knew how foolish he had been. The only way for them to be together? If he had known...

He remembered how it had started after Hogwarts. While Katarina was preparing her Auror training in London, he had started his job as a Potions assistant.

Auror Training was taught in a special part of the Wizarding University of London. The University had many similarities with Hogwarts. Taken altogether, the buildings were as big as the Hogwarts castle. The students lived in one of those buildings, but unlike the school, they had their own flat instead of sharing a common room. Like in Hogwarts, no one could Apparate or Disapparate within the University. The use of Floo Powder was forbidden as a safety measure during the war.

Severus had taken a correspondence course and sometimes went to University. Then he stayed at Katarina's apartment and slept in her couch. Wearing the Dark Mark on his arm meant more than he had realised. He couldn't allow Katarina to see the mark. So he had to keep his distance from her and limit their exchanges to kisses and hugs. They just continued their relationship as they had left it after Hogwarts. It seemed all right, because they were very young.

Sometimes, Severus put a potion in Katarina's tea, to make her fall asleep. Then he used a Charm on her, to see how mature her powers were. She always had a red aura around her, which meant she wasn't powerful enough. Each time, Severus feared her aura would turn blue. In that case, he'd have to inform the Dark Lord that her powers were ready to be stolen.

The Potions master sighed. How could he have watched her like that? Making her drink potions, although she didn't know... Checking on her powers... Thinking of warning the Dark Lord if her powers became mature... He would have felt betrayed if she had done that to him. Severus was glad Burns didn't know about that part. She already had enough reasons to hate him without that.

***

Professor Burns was reading in her quarters in the Emerald Star, when someone knocked at the door.

"Come in," she grumbled. Couldn't she be alone for one bloody hour?

Alphonso entered. "Capt'n B.," he said, "I have to warn you that the Potions master of Hogwarts," he uttered disdainfully, "wanted to see you. He was waiting outside your office door."

"What did he want?" Burns asked.

Alphonso looked awkward. "Er..." he said, "I didn't ask."

"You didn't ask?" Burns repeated, enunciating her words. "Tell me, Alphonso," she continued, "which part of your job did you find tiring today? Bringing books to me, or closing my office door? Was it difficult to ask a simple question?"

"I... informed, er... Professor Snape," Alphonso said, "that you didn't want to be bothered with unpleasant visitors."

"And what are you doing in my quarters then?" Burns asked.

Alphonso looked surprised. But Burns had to remind him of his proper place. Did he think he could break the rules because he was her second-in-command? Or had he thought that his Veela ancestry had power upon her? In both cases, he was wrong.

"I'm sorry, Captain," he replied, "I..."

"You'd better be sorry," Burns snapped. "You interrupted me when I was reading a good passage. Now if you have nothing else to say, you can leave."

Alphonso seemed disappointed. "Yes, Captain," he responded. Then he left the room.

Burns closed her book. She couldn't read anymore now. She was angry. Alphonso took too many liberties with his work. Sometimes he was much too familiar with her or at least he tried to be. Burns wasn't pleased with his attitude. He was a good fighter and he had deserved his rank. But if he continued to be so conceited, she would give him a lower rank. There was no ambiguity. She was the boss, and he worked for her.

Burns snapped her fingers and Apparated to her office. She had still many memories to check. What had happened after she had left Hogwarts? Burns remembered that she was not friends with James and Sirius anymore. Peter, that awful traitor, still spoke to her from time to time. But... Damn! Everything was so confusing! She had better check, and maybe take a few notes if it was necessary...

***

London, February, first year of Katarina's Auror's training.

Katarina took a book and sat on a bench. She had an important Transfigurations' exam in three days, and she wanted to have a good mark. Auror's tests were much more difficult than those she had in Hogwarts. The Ministry recruited only the best students to the post of Auror. She had to work hard.

She tried to focus on her book, but she couldn't. She had seen Severus last weekend, but she missed him already. It would have been easier if Severus had studied at University all the time. But he had been offered the post of Potions assistant.

Katarina pulled Severus' latest letter from her books. It was full of anecdotes about the Hogwarts teachers and students. Katarina was happy for him. Severus' real interest was the Defence Against the Dark Arts post. He wanted to become a teacher, and their former Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Mr. Polth, would probably retire in a few years. Maybe Severus would get the job? That was a great opportunity.

But why were Severus' letters always so cold? He hardly showed any sign of his feelings in his notes. Although Katarina often felt disappointed, she knew Severus was not very demonstrative. But each time she was with him, Katarina immediately forgot about the coldness of his letters. The way he looked at her was more explicit than anything. Katarina knew that she had managed to pierce his protective shell. He loved her. No need to rush anything in their relationship. Although it was difficult and frightening to be apart from him, the moments spent together were wonderful. Katarina would give Severus the time he needed.

Katarina was deep in thought, when she heard a voice call for her. She raised her head. Sirius Black stood in front of her.

He was also studying to become an Auror and shared several classes with her, as did James. But Katarina always avoided them both. She lowered her head and ignored him.

"Katarina," Sirius repeated. "We need to talk, please."

"Talk?" Katarina retorted sharply. "Talk? You hexed my boyfriend! You... you had even tried to kill him! I don't want to talk to you anymore!"

"It was an accident," Sirius replied.

"An accident?" Katarina retorted. "Severus told me everything about that day. You knew he would go and try to find out about Remus! You told him what to do to pass through the Whomping Willow! You knew he would face Remus as a werewolf!"

"He spied on us all the time, trying to get us expelled!" Sirius exclaimed. "He always waited for an occasion to hex us and perform Dark magic! Snape has always been fascinated by the Dark Arts!"

"Oh, that's rubbish!" Katarina retorted. She raised her eyes. "That's just a stupid rumour written by Frank Longbottom in The Hogwarts Gazette. Like when he wrote that Severus drank goat's blood on the full moon. Pathetic!"

"Listen," Sirius said, "I wanted to teach Snape a lesson, ok? I didn't think things would turn that way!"

"A lesson?" Katarina repeated. "For whom? Your friend Remus, who could have become a murderer because of you? Or Severus maybe? Curiosity killed the cat, eh? Especially when the cat faced a werewolf!" She spat. "You should have learned the lesson, Sirius. However, you persisted and attacked Severus again at the end of seventh year."

"I was furious about the Spring Ball," Sirius said.

Katarina snorted. "And the first time, what were you furious about? Because Severus had eaten the biscuit you wanted? If James hadn't done anything to help, Severus would be dead now. James saved his life! Do you realise what you almost did? Now I understand better why Severus hates Remus so much! It's because of you! I think you should be proud, Black!"

"I'm sorry," Sirius said. "Really sorry. I was just stupid. I didn't realise what it meant. And the second time, I was blinded by my jealousy and my anger."

Sirius looked sincere. However, Katarina didn't want to forgive him. That was too easy. "You don't understand what I felt when I saw you had cursed Severus," Katarina replied. "What it did to me later, when I learnt he had almost been killed in sixth year. I felt as if I had almost lost him. And I don't care if Severus injured you the last time you tried to hurt him. You attacked him from behind. Like a coward. I wish he had hurt you more." Katarina repressed a sob.

"I'm sorry," Sirius repeated. "I hope you'll be able to forgive me. I miss our friendship." He paused. "Why didn't you come to the wedding?"

James and Lily's wedding had been set at the beginning of September. Katarina had wanted to come, but she'd had to decline the invitation. A painful memory.

"For several reasons," Katarina replied coldly. "First, my boyfriend couldn't come with me. He was not invited, and even if he had been, he wouldn't have come. Second, you were present at the wedding. It would have even been ok, if James hadn't planned to seat us together at the same table. Third, Lily said awful things to me about my relationship with Severus. Fourth, the only person I wanted to see was Remus. But since he almost killed Severus, because of you... Severus feared something would happen to me. He had just lost his father. He was shocked enough without worrying about me. Fifth, I had enough of being judged by my friends for loving him. So don't talk to me about friendship!"

Katarina stood up and left.

***

Lily's wedding? Ah, right. Burns remembered she had had a clash with Lily a few days before the ceremony. Again, she should have listened to Lily and dump Snape. But how had Katarina made up with Lily, Sirius, and James? Hmmm...

***

London, February, first year of Katarina's Auror's training.

Katarina was in her apartment, a letter from Remus in her hands:

"Dear Kat,

I spoke to Sirius. I know how mad at him you are. I was too, when the accident happened in sixth year. If I had killed Severus, I would have been imprisoned, maybe executed. But Sirius is really sorry for everything. If I managed to forgive him, I think you could try. For me. Think of it.

Take care,

Remus."

Katarina took a parchment and a quill to reply.

"Dear Remus,

You are talking about forgiving. I have forgiven Sirius for a lot of things, because I knew that I had hurt him, when he discovered I dated Severus. I have forgiven Sirius for the 'filthy Slytherin' and other insults. I was pained, but I accepted his reaction.

But when I learnt that Sirius had hexed Severus... it was too much. I saw Severus in the Hospital Wing, his arm broken and his face bruised, and it was too much. Especially when I learnt it was not the first time that it had happened. That you could have killed him because of Sirius. If James had not been there, you'd have killed Severus. And..."

... And they would have never been together. Her heart tightened at this terrible thought. Katarina scribbled the 'and' and continued.

"Remember when I entered the Gryffindor common room? When I hit Sirius? I said I would never forgive him. How could I forgive? Curse it! Sirius sent my boyfriend to the Hospital Wing!"

Katarina stopped writing. She was too angry. She had lost too much in those quarrels. Just because she was in love with Severus, the whole world had seemed to be against her.

"How dare Sirius speak to me about friendship? How dare he ask why I didn't come to James and Lily's wedding? After what Lily said to me!

I really wanted to come, although it angered Severus. I often quarrelled with him about Lily. I kept defending her when he insulted her. I said that she was not James, that she had never done anything to him. And I would have come to the wedding despite his opinion. But being seated beside Sirius... I couldn't accept.

Do you know what hurt the most? When my 'friend' Lily reproached me for my relationship with him. When she said that I hadn't made the right choice. That she wondered why I had chosen an 'awful git like Snape instead of Sirius.' That Severus had trapped me. That he couldn't love me, since 'this horrible prat didn't have feelings.'

You said those were James' words. Probably. But it hurt all the same. I couldn't let Lily insult my boyfriend like that. Yes, deciding not to come to the wedding was difficult. Telling Severus was even harder. He didn't even try to mask his delight..."

Katarina sighed. If only Severus could understand what she had renounced for him. He considered it revenge against the Marauders and Lily. But he didn't seem to realise it was proof of Katarina's love.

"No one realises what I feel..."

That was not entirely true. Remus was the only one who had understood; the only one who had helped her. He was the kindest and fairest person Kat had ever met. He had never turned from her, even when Sirius had discovered the truth about Severus and her at the Spring Ball.

"... except you. Severus doesn't even try to understand."

Katarina was exhausted. Her anger had faded. She just felt sad. She didn't want to send her message to Remus anymore. He appeared to be as afflicted by the situation as she was.

She reread Remus' letter again and again. She was touched by its contents. Although she was still mad at Sirius, Remus was right. Something terrible would have happened to him, if he had killed Severus. If Remus had forgiven Sirius, she should try. At least, she should give him a chance. For Remus.

She knew where Sirius lived. Maybe she could go there and chat with him? She walked along the corridors and went to the third flood, number 367. She knocked at the door. She didn't know what to say, but now it was too late. Sirius opened the door.

"Katarina?" he asked. He looked surprised.

Katarina heard chattering from inside. "Oh, you have company," Katarina apologised. She felt ridiculous. Why didn't she send him an Owl? "I'll... come back later." She made a few steps to leave.

"Wait!" Sirius exclaimed. Katarina stopped. "It's just Prongs and Lily!"

"Oh," Katarina replied. She felt even more ridiculous. She hadn't spoken to them since she had quarrelled with Lily.

Sirius probably noticed she felt awkward. "They miss you too," he said.

"I don't think so," Katarina retorted. Then she left quickly, before Sirius could say anything.

She returned to her apartment. Speaking alone with Sirius was hard enough, but she couldn't face James and Lily.

Severus minutes later, someone knocked at the door. She opened it. Sirius, James, and Lily stood in front of her. She was surprised. She hadn't expected them to come.

"Can we come in?" Sirius asked.

"Er," Katarina replied, "yes." Now they were here, she couldn't refuse.

Sirius, James, and Lily entered the sitting room.

"The flat is... a mess," Katarina said. "Er... do you want to... sit down?"

James and Lily sat on the couch. Sirius and Katarina sat on the armchairs. Lily took James' left hand in hers.

"Nice flat," Sirius commented. He looked at her desk, where a pile of messy books threatened to collapse. He smiled.

"I thought that girls liked to tidy everything," he said.

"Oh," Katarina replied awkwardly, "well... I guess that's just a myth."

There was a heavy silence.

"Where's Cooky?" Lily asked.

"She's with Sev..." Katarina stopped in mid-sentence. Sirius, James, and Lily stared at her. Katarina cleared her throat. "She's not here," she continued. "She stayed in Hogwarts. I thought she would be happier with other house-elves. I mean... house-elves that she's known for a long time..."

"At Snape's service?" James asked. Was his question ironical? Probably.

"Er," Katarina replied, "yes."

There was another awkward pause.

"Do you want something to drink?" Katarina asked.

Sirius nodded. Katarina went to the kitchen. She prepared glasses and took a bottle of pumpkin juice. She put everything on a tray. God! Why did they come? She was ill at ease. They had nothing to say to each other. She went back and put the tray on a low table.

"I'm sorry, Katarina," Lily said suddenly. Katarina was surprised. "James told me you gave him advice during summer holidays our sixth year. Dating advice. You helped us to be together. I should have done the same for you."

"Yeah," James said. He lowered his head and took his glasses off. He clumsily cleaned them with his napkin. "We shouldn't have judged your relation with Sniv--" Lily's grabbed James' arm. "Er, Snape," James corrected.

"As for me," Sirius said, "I shouldn't have hexed him at the end of the school term. And I shouldn't have told him how to get through the Whomping Willow in sixth year. It was not very kind to Moony and to you."

Remus? Her? What about Severus? Katarina frowned.

"Er..." Sirius added quickly, "and for Sniv... er, Snape." Lily stared at him reproachfully. Sirius' eyes opened wide. "Snape... Snape!" he repeated louder to repair his mistake.

Katarina sighed.

"We apologise," Lily said. "I wish you had come to the wedding. It's a shame that you aren't in any of the wedding photographs. I didn't know what to say to Peter, when he asked me where you were."

"Peter?" Katarina queried. "He hardly Owled me. I thought he was mad at me."

"No," Sirius said. "Wormtail felt the situation awkward. I guess that's why he didn't Owl you." Katarina felt relieved.

"What's he doing now?" she asked. "The last time he Owled me, he had applied for a job in Gringotts. Did he get it?"

"Yes," James replied. "His aunt had relatives at the bank. He's working in an office counting other people's money. Probably the best job for Wormtail." He laughed.

Katarina smiled. "Probably," she responded. Peter's obsession was money. She had never seen anyone so stingy. He loved calculating his money to the last Knut. "What about you, Lily?" Katarina continued. "Do you enjoy working in the chemist's shop?"

"I love it," Lily replied. "I'm glad it's close to the University. James and I don't need to take two flats. It would have been horrible to be separated from him!"

"Yes, that's not easy to be... separated," Katarina responded. She thought of Severus. Yes, that was very difficult.

Lily put a hand on her mouth. "Oh, sorry, Kat!" she exclaimed. "I forgot you--"

"That's ok," Katarina interrupted. She paused. "Will you show me the photographs of the wedding, Lily? Remus wrote they were beautiful."

Lily smiled. "Of course," she said.

Katarina smiled too. They became friends again.

***

6