- Harry Potter/Severus Snape
- Harry Potter Severus Snape
- Slash Angst
- The Harry Potter at Hogwarts Years
- Philosopher's Stone Chamber of Secrets Prizoner of Azkaban Goblet of Fire Order of the Phoenix
Published: 01/12/2005Updated: 02/09/2005Words: 146,361Chapters: 30Hits: 275,831
Green Eyes Sublime
- Story Summary:
- When Harry returns to Hogwarts for his sixth year, only Severus seems to truly notice how deeply Harry's despair goes. Since Dumbledore is as blinded as everyone else, Severus decides to take matters into his own hands and help. But doing that means opening up his own soul and secrets to the Boy-Who-Lived, because Harry isn't going to just heal in one day. SS/HP, SLASH and depression related theme.
- Chapter Summary:
- Harry returns to Hogwarts for his Seventh Year with a new determination to overcome all obstacles in his way. It doesn't take him long to realize that there is just a little more that he has to learn in order for him to win the love of a master. And in the confines of love and war, Severus must now learn when to let Harry go. SS/HP SLASH and Violence.
- Author's Note:
- Thanks: To my wonderful beta readers Amanda_Saitou and Philo whose wonderful help kept me sane.
Shadows in the Smoke
Harry, Neville and Dean had left Transfiguration class together, went to their dorm room to collect the books for their next class and was on their way when they realized that they were going to be late for their next class. Actually, Dean and Neville were going to be more late because they still had to get to Greenhouse Five for Herbiology while Harry had only to turn down three more corridors and the Slytherin hallway would be in sight. From there, the Potions' classroom would not be far off.
Neville and Dean had burst into a run. A short lived run, since Professor Snape, who had been heading to his office, suddenly appeared out one of the corners near the Hospital Wing. Of course, as his luck would have it, Neville had not been able to stop quickly enough and appeared to almost bounce off the professor to land in a heap on the ground.
Harry had shouted in caution. Snape had shouted in disgust. Poor Neville was blushing like an eleven year old on his knees before his most feared professor, while Dean seemed to be valiantly fighting the effort to dissolve in laughter.
"Ten points from Gryffindor!" Snape snarled as Harry caught up to the little group. "In fact, you will both serve detentions tonight with Filch. This is the exact reason why running is forbidden in the corridors. As Seventh year students I should not have to be addressing such brazen ignorance of rules that you have been aware of since your first year."
Neville cringed at every word, which by all appearances were aimed at him. Dean had hung his head in what looked like shame but could have very well been insolence. It was Harry this time who did not manage to hide his smile.
"Two points from Gryffindor, Potter." Severus turned cold dark eyes at him. "As Head Boy, you should know better than to allow your friends to blatantly break Hogwarts' rules."
Severus turned to glare at them all again before walking away and turning down the Slytherin corridor.
"Sorry Harry. You shouldn't have lost points for just being our friend," Neville said as Dean helped him to his feet.
Harry shrugged. "It's okay Neville. Something tells me he would have thought of some excuse to take points away from me any way. For 'being in the vicinity of the accident'."
Dean gave Neville a huge smile and a pat. "Next time Neville, save both Harry and I the trauma and make sure that you don't smack into Professor Snape again. I honestly thought he was going to hex you just for daring to come into close contact with his robe."
Neville turned a shade lighter at the realization that the professor may have just as well considered the option. Before he could start hyperventilating or something, Harry reminded them with a chuckle of the reason why they had been in such a rush in the first place.
With quick shouts of goodbye, the two began running again. Harry laughed, hoping that this time they didn't go hurtling into McGonagall.
He ducked down the Slytherin corridor with the smile still on his face.
"Enter," Severus commanded at the three rapid knocks on his office door.
Immediately, the door opened and Harry stepped into the office, pausing only to close the door and cast a Silencing spell.
"You are very mean," Harry chided with a smile.
Severus locked gaze with the sparkling emerald green of Harry's eyes as the teen began to slowly stride over to where Severus stood organizing potion ingredients.
"Wasn't that a little harsh though?" Harry still looked somewhat amused. "Twelve points all at once and I wasn't even doing anything! Besides, you can't possibly tell me that you didn't run down the corridors for class when you were a student here. I'm pretty sure they're made for that. It's a rule."
"Corridors were made to be walked along," Severus scowled. "And rules, if broken, should be done less blatantly. You have perfected the art rather well. Is it just a Slytherin talent to be discrete?"
"Not everyone can be Slytherins or have the traits."
Harry smiled teasingly, wrapping his arms around Severus' neck as Severus immediately pulled the teen closer, trapping him against the table. Severus brushed his lips lightly against Harry's lips. Then, he trailed small kisses along the sharp jaw line, and chin.
"You're very mean," Harry said softly.
"Indeed I am," Severus said meeting green eyes again.
Leaning, he captured Harry's lips between his again, eliciting a moan as their tongues met in battle again. Harry's fingers tangled in his hair and Severus pulled him closer, and at the same time, pressing him into the table even more. Harry seemed to fit perfectly in his arms and against his body. There was so much trust in the kiss and the embrace.
"You need to get to class," Severus broke the kiss gently. "You know quite well that I'll deduct points if you're late."
Harry groaned in obvious reluctance, extracting his arms from around Severus' neck, then throwing the wizard a mock glare of his own.
Severus kissed him very lightly again.
That little act got a soft sigh from Harry. Severus raised a hand to glide his thumb across the red and slightly swollen lips before whispering the Healing spell.
"You looked thoroughly kissed Potter," He said by way of explanation. "I can't have that."
Harry smiled. "I should go."
Chuckling, Harry wrapped his arms around Severus' waist tightly. He pressed a kiss against the side of Severus' neck and Severus groaned.
"Don't you ever get tired of hugging me?" he asked.
Harry violently shook his head before resting it on Severus' shoulders.
"No," He whispered. "I'll never get tired of being so near to you."
Another few seconds later, Harry sighed again. Severus watched him walk over to the door, open it and left, before he remembered that he too had to prepare for the same lesson.
Taking out his wand to make most of the ingredients pocket size, he gave his table one last look, then exited the room.
Harry barely made it to his seat in time before Professor Snape strode into the classroom looking decidedly calmer than Harry felt. Harry had left Severus' office and immediately began to run so that he could make it within the three minutes before class. Severus had somehow managed to arrive precisely on time and Harry was positive that he had not run.
"Collect your cauldron at the back of the class and continue preparing your potions. Pages nine hundred to nine hundred and fifty should help correct most mistakes previously made. For those of you who are beyond such redemption, the instructions of how to continue are on the board. Beg, borrow or steal some of the potions from another person. I want each student to have a vial of Verataserum labeled at the end of today's lesson. You will all be administering a sample to each other and since I doubt that anyone would appreciate a trip to see Madame Pomfrey, you had all better get this right. We have been working on this potion for a month now. I think it's time we end my misery."
The instructions appeared on the board as the Professor had stated and everyone collected first their cauldrons with quick Levitation spells, then the ingredients that they would need that were not a part of their Potions' supply.
"Got everything?" Hermione asked as soon as Harry returned from gathering the ingredients for the three of them.
Harry was holding three stalks of a beautiful white flower, a small vial of unicorn tears and a jar of what he thought to still look suspiciously like it held kernels of dried corn.
"I think I did," Harry replied. "Check the instructions."
Hermione quickly looked on the potion instructions then smiled widely. "Yes we have it all. Let's get to work then?"
Ron and Harry exchanged a look. Hermione had been incredibly excited at the prospect of creating the truth serum and the month long preparations had done nothing to suffocate her incessant glee. Unlike everyone else, who were now more than ready to finish the potion and then never have to look at it again.
Veritaserum was one of the hardest potions that everyone had ever had to make.
So far, about half of the number of students in the class had spoilt their potion within the first week. Since they would never have the time to start over, they had to get their friends to share. The Slytherins were at first the only ones that seemed to be on the right track, but by the third week even they were working on only about half the size of what their potions should be.
Luckily for the three, Harry had only spoilt his potion once in the first week and Hermione had been quick enough to save it before it all had to be tossed. Ron had been smart enough to double his ingredients in preparation for such a disaster. This meant that by the time Hermione's own coagulated, Ron was able to give her a half of his. Two days later, Ron's potion turned purple and the three knew that this was the end of Ron's lucky streak. Hermione and Harry had given Ron a third of their potions each and all became right with their world again.
Harry thought that Severus took the whole four weeks remarkably well. The wizard had only come close to hexing five of the students for exploding cauldrons on three separate occasions.
Everyone was holding bets to see when he would truly lose his temper. So far the professor had managed to abide by his rule of not being the cause of one of his student's death.
A good thing in everyone's book, really.
"Hermione, did you figure out what type of flowers these are?" Harry asked as he plucked the long white petals that were lined delicately by a dark pink colour.
"Rhododendrons," Ron said softly beside him as he too plucked at a flower.
Adding two drop of unicorn tears to the petals, Harry began to grind the mixture into a white paste with swirling pink streaks. Next, in another container, he began to grind the 'corn' into a fine yellow powder as he had seen Severus do once the year before.
"They have to be added simultaneously to the cauldrons," Hermione said, glancing at the board.
Harry looked up also but could not see where she found that particular instruction. Putting all his trust in her and hoping with all his strength that he did not ruin his potion, he added the two ingredients.
Immediately there was a loud explosion and the potion began to smoke heavily.
"Three points from Gryffindor, Potter!" Professor Snape snarled when the smoke cleared and everyone seemed to be uninjured.
"I didn't do anything!" Harry shouted in outrage, just a little shaken by the reaction.
"The instructions distinctly said to add simultaneously," the professor said as he strode over to examine Harry's potion. "If you were one more second off, that explosion would have included the cauldron and everyone within forty feet of it! I don't think Malfoy or any of the Hufflepuffs would have appreciated that."
Hermione glanced at Harry's potion also. "It looks okay now, Professor."
"That, Granger, is not the point," Snape glared threateningly at her before turning to Harry again. "Go to my desk and wait. I have to ensure that your potion does not cause another interruption."
"I can't do that! Then the potion will be ruined. You're the one who says that timing is important!" Harry exclaimed.
Immediately receiving a glare from his professor, Harry decided to obey the instruction before he landed himself in detention with Dean and Neville later.
A sniff of the potion and a very begrudging look of acceptance later, Snape joined Harry at his table.
Before Harry could begin protesting the injustice again or ask the reasons behind the instructions, Severus gave him a very meaningful look before turning to subtly look in the direction that Ron and Hermione were standing. Harry followed the hint to realize that the two had begun a soft conversation together.
"You need to be more observing Potter," Severus said softly.
Without warning and not even a spell word, the room was suddenly filled with the echoes of rushing sound. Then all went completely silent, but for two very distinct voices.
"Ron what's wrong? You seem a little quiet."
"Sorry 'Mione. I've just been thinking."
"No. About Harry."
"Yes Hermione. Don't act so innocent, I know you know."
"What are you talking about?"
"He draws him a lot. At first it seemed strange that he would draw Professor Snape so often. There are so many of them. I mean there are others too but somehow the ones of him seem to be done with a lot more effort."
"I'm not angry or anything. I have to tell Harry that. It's just strange. It's a lot to think about you know, because they don't act any different around each other. They still shout and Harry still gets so pissed off. It's just very strange. I would almost have just put it down to Harry trying to be creative but I've been watching them this past month. In fact, I've been watching you and Harry too. That's what tipped me off."
"So you know?"
"And you're not angry or anything?"
"I'm a bit...squeaked, but otherwise no. 'Mione he's my best friend and damn it, he's been through enough. I'm not going to be the one to make his life miserable anymore. I'd rather not think on the subject too hard, but I'm okay with it."
"Then you should tell him."
"Yes. Only not now. I have to get used to the realization a bit longer."
The sound in the room suddenly returned to normal again. Still looking at his two friends as Hermione kissed Ron quickly on the cheek, Harry meandered his way back to his cauldron.
"Hey Harry, what was that about?" Ron asked. "Why did he call you up there?"
"I don't know," Harry replied, but he gave Hermione a wink that Ron was sure to notice.
When the class was dismissed an hour later, and everyone was basking in sweet relief that Snape had decided against letting them all try their potions, Harry and his friends left the room a little quickly.
Ron and Hermione were going to an early lunch, but they walked Harry to the room of his 'private lessons' before shouting goodbye and disappearing down the corridor hand in hand.
When Severus entered the room, the first thing he noticed were the flowers.
There was a field of them all in shades of yellow, pink and white. At the centre of the room was the cauldron of potion that he had been preparing. Near it, sitting on a huge boulder, was Harry weaving his magic as always.
Harry was now officially finished with the weave and Severus had immediately changed their lesson to Potions. Now that he could do it without becoming exhausted, Harry was having a lot of fun in his spare time playing around with the design and structure. His goal was to learn how to make it disperse into golden currents of magic like Severus could.
So far he did not seem to be anywhere near this goal but he had forbidden Severus to help him.
"Hello," Harry said softly, when he finally noticed Severus' presence.
Severus made his way over to where Harry sat through a little path that appeared. Abandoning his weaving efforts, Harry sat patiently waiting until Severus was standing before him.
"Rhododendrons. They're very nice."
"Well it's good to know that you pay attention in class."
Harry laughed and shrugged. "No. Ron told me the name. I figured out the unicorn tears and that meant that Hermione was to work on that other ingredient."
"Do you know why Rhododendrons are used to stabilize Veritaserum?" Severus picked one of the yellow flowers and held it out to Harry. "In fact, it's the very reason why the room has them here now."
Harry took the flower and examined it carefully. "Why?"
"Rhododendron is the flower of deceit," Severus said pointedly, turning to walk over to the cauldron.
Harry followed and watched as Severus filled a vial of the transparent liquid. In surprise he peered into the cauldron at the potion within.
"We're doing Veritaserum today?" he asked.
Severus nodded. "Yes. I brewed this one myself since I knew that the ones made in class would be of no use to anyone. You will be learning to fight the effects."
"So first I learn to brew it, then I get learn how to thwart it?"
"Yes," Severus smirked, "sit so I can administer it."
Behind Harry a chair immediately appeared so he sat. Tilting Harry's head slightly, Severus dropped three small drops of the potion on Harry's tongue.
"What is your name?" Severus asked.
"Harry James Potter," Harry answered immediately.
"How old are you?"
"Seventeen years old."
"Good. The potion is working properly then," Severus said, leaving to put the vial carefully down on a table that appeared near the boulder.
Returning to stand before Harry he told the young wizard to take a few deep breaths and clear his mind.
"The clearer your mind is will be the easier for you to do this," Severus said as Harry obeyed his instruction. "Veritaserum is a powerful potion. It's purpose is to override all sense of unjust and to uncover truth no matter how deeply hidden. The only way to fight it is not to. The truth will come forth, but the trick is to use will power. There are more than one ways to answer a question truthfully."
Harry smiled then nodded and Severus began his questioning again.
"If I wanted to manipulate you or to cause you great pain, who are the people I would use to destroy you?"
Harry gasped audibly with wide eyes reflecting betrayal at such an unfair question. He could not stop the names that filed past his lips, though he tried everything from covering his mouth to biting his lower lip.
In the end, all the members of the Order were listed, including Severus, Ron and Hermione.
Severus merely raised an eyebrow as Harry began to blush.
"You would willing condemn me to torture, Harry?" Severus asked softly. "You would condemn your friends, Albus and Remus?"
Harry shook his head looking very ashamed. "No. I would never do that. I would rather die myself than allow the Order to suffer because of me."
Severus reached out a hand to cup Harry's cheek and gazed into the sorrowful green eyes.
"Then use that. Use your fears and the love that makes you so unique and powerful. Remember what I said about truth. Even lies can become like truth."
"How would you answer?" Harry asked softly. "Maybe if you show me then I can do it too."
Walking over to the table, Severus uncorked the vial again and took three drops of the Veritaserum. He returned to standing before Harry with such calm that for the first time, Harry understood how Severus managed to stand before Voldemort as a spy all those years.
"Where is the exact location for the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix?" Harry asked.
Severus shrugged with unreadable eyes and an expression that gave nothing away. "You cannot expect me to know, since I am not the Secret Keeper."
Harry was impressed. He had never thought of giving such a misleading yet legitimate answer to a question.
"Are you a member of the Order of the Phoenix?" Severus shot back.
Harry groaned and pressed a hand to his forehead, before answering in a whisper. "Yes."
Obviously a lot more work still had to be done in Severus' opinion.
By the time the Veritaserum wore off Severus was the one sitting while Harry paced back and forth sighing and groaning and muttering about how much he was going to be the death of the entire world. Frankly Severus was not so convinced. The room did not help much also because it had changed from the brightness of being outdoors to its usual stone cold floor and semi-darkness. As always, candles floated along the walls.
"Harry, stop berating yourself. I told you that this is a very difficult potion to outsmart. You should not have expected to succeed on your first lesson," Severus said but Harry continued to pace.
"I feel so stupid!" Harry declared, turning to face Severus. "I have to know how to do this. All those questions you asked, all a Death Eater will have to do is ask those very questions and I would condemn you all to bear Voldemort's wrath!"
Severus stood and walked over to the distressed teen. "I will teach you how to do this. It will just take time."
"I don't have time!" Harry shouted. "All Voldemort has to do is port-key me to some remote location and I would be helpless."
"Harry," Severus said somewhat gently. "I sincerely doubt that potions will be his first option."
"Well I can't do anything can I? I can't fight him. I've barely survived the last six years and now I feel like a vessel full of very important information that can be elicited out of me without much trouble," Harry groaned angrily. "He doesn't even need a weapon! Look at me, I can tell him everything he wants to know and -"
Severus kissed him.
The kiss at first was very coaxing as Severus tried to dispel Harry's fears. It quickly became almost desperate as Harry began to sob his fears and anxiety. Holding him tightly, Severus moved their bodies back until he was sitting on the chair and Harry was straddling his lap. His arms tightened around Harry's waist and he lightened the kiss to a gentle gliding of lips. Harry whimpered and sobbed, clinging almost desperately to the soothing protection that Severus was offering to him.
Harry's fingers tangled in the long black mass of soft hair beneath his fingers as Severus' hand slipped into Harry's robes. He tugged Harry's uniform shirt from the pants and slid his hand up the warm expanse of Harry's back, feeling the snake on Harry's skin slither and curl beneath his palm and the hilt of the sword beneath his fingers.
"Harry..." Severus said softly as he broke the kiss.
Harry closed his eyes and tilted his forehead upon Severus' forehead as he tried to calm his breathing. He shifted in Severus' lap, biting back a groan by biting his lower lip sharply as sparks of arousal shot through his body.
"I don't think I can move," Harry said, though he adjusted his position so that his head was instead resting on Severus' shoulders.
Severus sighed patiently. "You will have to. I have the Third Years in half an hour and I don't think I want to risk teaching them without first eating."
Harry sighed also but he rose to his feet and pulled Severus up also.
"Stay here and calm down a while before you go to lunch," Severus told him. "Bottle and label a few vials of Veritaserum if you wish. Can you try to come and see me tonight?"
Harry nodded. Severus pressed another kiss to his lips before striding to the door, leaving Harry standing with a dazed expression on his face.
Walking briskly away from Harry's private training room, it was not long before Severus turned down the Slytherin corridor on his way to his own quarters. Usually the Slytherin dungeon was one of the quietest areas since Slytherins had better things to do with their time than waste it in the hallways and had more to worry about than late classes.
This was why Severus immediately became suspicious as he heard the sound of struggled breathing as he neared his rooms.
Cautiously approaching he was incredibly surprised to see a Slytherin student fall to his knees and doubled over, seemingly in pain. Platinum blond hair and the obvious pale complexion left no doubt that it was Draco Malfoy.
The Deputy Head Boy seemed to be clutching an owl post tightly in his hands, even as he struggled to breath.
"Malfoy?" Severus called, approaching the slightly trembling figure.
Draco turned to look up at his Head of House with silver grey eyes wide and obviously fearful. Before Severus could ask him what was wrong, Draco stood shakily to his feet and ran past his professor, looking as if he was going to be sick all over the floor at any minute.
Severus watched him leave and wondered at the scene he had just witnessed. He had not seen such reactions in a long time. He would need to observe Malfoy more closely now in order to see if his speculations were correct. In the meantime, Severus made his way to his quarters, now even more lost in thought.
He made it as far as the door before the pain in his arm struck.
It had been a long time since Severus had felt the Dark Mark burn so intensely. Sparks of light shot behind his eyelids as he clutched his wrist, forcing himself to not make a sound as he writhed against the wall. As if reading his thoughts the door opened on it's own and Severus stumbled inside and into his bedroom.
His nails dug crescent shapes into his flesh as he curled upon black silk sheets. In his mouth, he tasted the metal tang of blood as he bit the insides of his cheeks. Still not a sound left his lips. His vision swam at the waves of pain and almost mercifully he realized that the edges of his sight had become grey and hazy in preparation for unconsciousness.
Somewhere in the back of his mind, he hoped that Harry had already passed out from the pain.
Then slowly the pain began to decrease. Severus' wrist was already bleeding tiny droplets of blood but he did not release his grasp until the pain had dulled to a light ache. As soon as he was strong enough to move, he pulled himself up from the bed and walked over to the fireplace.
Throwing a handful of Floo Powder into the fire, Severus stepped into the flickering green flames.