The Worm That Turned

Chapter 12 - A Terrible Revelation

Almost every Death Eater in the organisation was present in the church, hooded and robed and in various states of nervousness. It was the largest scale operation the Death Eaters had ever attempted. Usually they operated in smaller groups, stealthy and efficient, in their specialised areas. Now they were in a vast crowd, grouped with unfamiliar comrades, and many had no direct experience of wand-wand combat. Attacking defenceless Muggles was not the same as going for the wizards of the Order. Severus felt a growing sense of unease. It was a disaster waiting to happen.

The Dark Lord had branded them all with glowing numbers on the backs of their robes, enabling them to identity each other. Colours were used to identify their different roles within the overall plan. Severus, as one of the best duellers, was part of the first wave and therefore the 'D7' on his back glowed red. Lucius' 'D1' designation was a rather attractive purple. He'd probably chosen the colours himself.

At the appointed time, they would start to move. Before they even arrived at their destination, they were faced with a logistical nightmare. Moving such a big number of people to the same place without arousing suspicion was difficult. An elaborate plan had been worked out, mostly thanks to Severus' logical brain, involving various means of transport and different routes. Now they were awaiting some sort of signal, presumably from whatever informant the original intelligence had come from.

At last Lucius called everyone to attention. 'We are ready. Remember, stay with your appointed group and follow your travel plan to the letter. If you run into trouble, inform me via your Mark and go to ground. Do not, repeat, do not risk leading anyone to our destination. When we arrive, time will be of essence. As soon as sufficient numbers are mustered, the first wave will go forwards. The second wave will follow on my command, gaining the advantage of surprise. We will rid this country of Muggle-lovers and half-breed scum. We will regain our rightful place as wizards! We will win back our rights for our children!' He thrust a gloved fist into the air. 'The Dark Lord!'

'The Dark Lord!' chorused the Death Eaters, raggedly.

'The Dark Lord!' repeated Lucius, louder.

'The Dark Lord!' shouted the Death Eaters, more enthusiastically.

'The Dark Lord!' bellowed Lucius, one last time.

The echoing answer from the Death Eaters was a powerful sound, and Severus felt his spirits lift as he got swept along with it. 'First wave, depart!' shouted Lucius, and the masses cheered as Severus and his comrades mounted their brooms and kicked off.

'All very stirring,' remarked someone via their Mark, once they were airborne. 'Fancies himself a great leader of men, I reckon.'

'Pah! That prima donna? Flitting round on a broom while the rest of us do the real work? He might think he's the Dark Lord's favourite, but the Dark Lord sees him for what he is, all right!' There was no mistaking that voice. Severus identified Bellatrix several brooms ahead, a red 'A1' glowing on her back.

Most of the 'first wave' were from Bellatrix's cell. He knew many of them, although they were all disguised. Roddy and Rabastan were there of course, easily recognisable by their sheer size. They flew with Antonin Dolohov, one of the earliest Death Eaters, a sneering man with a streak of viciousness to rival Bellatrix's own. And there was a small, weedy figure that stuck close behind Bellatrix, whom he'd heard rumoured was none other than Barty Crouch Junior. Now there was a scandal that the Prophet would pay a small fortune to hear about. Just as well for Crouch that no Death Eater would even think of betraying the organisation.

There were others too, from a variety of squads, not all known to Severus. Even the members of the Inner Circle did not know all of their fellows. He tried not to spend too much thought on worrying about their identities. He needed to focus on the task in hand; staying on his broom. He was probably the only person who would find the flight there more taxing than the actual fighting.

They landed half an hour later in a small wood near a river. Dumbledore's country house was on a low hill not far off. They hid the brooms at the appointed place, where Voldemort had arranged for them to disappear. The plan was to apparate out, when secrecy no longer mattered. Bellatrix jiggled impatiently whilst they waited for the rest of the troops to start arriving. There was tension in the air, despite the tranquil setting. This was the phase that could most easily go wrong. If they were discovered before everyone arrived, they would be outnumbered and off guard. Severus paced the periphery, sharp eyes and ears alert to any sign of danger.

Once a reasonable number had mustered, Lucius gave the order to start advancing. As Severus followed the others out of the trees, his friend caught up with him and laid a hand on his arm. 'Good luck, old bean. Remember our deal.'

'Neither leaves without the other,' Severus affirmed, with a quick smile behind his mask.

Lucius nodded, and then in one fluid movement had mounted his broom and soared away. Severus had to jog to catch up with the rest of the first wave, who were moving rapidly across the open country. Of course, the majority of those there were practised assassins, used to eliminating Voldemort's opponents with as much or little fuss as was required.

Dumbledore's house came into view, a large redbrick building with an old barn to one side. It was probably a farmhouse once upon a time. 'Anti-apparition jinx placed,' came Lucius' voice.

'Exits sealed,' continued Rookwood, flying to the left of Lucius. 'Person revealing charm confirms presence of multiple persons within.'

Severus grasped his wand more tightly, heart starting to pump. They were fanning out into a spearhead formation, signalled by Bellatrix. The house seemed very near now. From here it appeared to be empty. He wondered if Lily was inside, prayed she wasn't.

'Dark Lord confirms Dumbledore otherwise engaged,' came Lucius' voice, and Severus knew his friend would be feeling sick now with nerves.

'Get on with it!' snapped Bellatrix's voice through the Mark.

'First wave, advance!' commanded Lucius.

The Lestranges, Crouch and Dolohov were moving even before Lucius gave the word, racing up the hill full pelt. Severus had barely started forwards himself when the first of them was thrown back, with a bright flash. An earsplitting siren began to wail. Roddy - or perhaps it was Rabastan - continued forwards and was similarly launched into the air to land with a thud several feet back. The rest pulled up, cursing. 'Undetectable protective wards!' screeched Lucius, circling round above them. 'Come on, lift them, lift them fast!'

From the house, movement could be seen in the windows. The Order were alerted to their presence. There was no point trying to hide. There was a bright shower of breaking glass, and a volley of spells emerged from a window. The protective charms were well designed; the spells of the defenders went straight through, whereas those fired back by the Death Eaters were repelled. Lucius was swearing fluently. This could turn into a disaster, aborted before they'd even begun. Already they'd lost their advantage of surprise. The sort of failure now staring them in the face was punishable by painful protracted death.

Severus closed his eyes and raised his wand. He felt for the edges of the spell, trying to work out how it was done, how to untangle it. 'Cover him! Cover D7! A6, B8, cover him now!' Lucius screamed. Severus tried not to think about how exposed he was, hoping the cover would be sufficient. The protective charms were good, probably the work of Dumbledore himself. But no charms were that good. Not against such a force.

'Everyone needs to throw as many spells as they can at the barrier at once!' he Marked up to Lucius. 'Volleys on three, over and over again. I think I can break it, if we have sufficient manpower behind it.'

Lucius relayed the instructions, and moments later the first onslaught hit the barrier. Severus slashed and dragged his wand through the air, muttering an incantation under his breath as he did so. The next surge of spells hit the barrier, and Severus felt it ripple and weaken. Someone else must have cottoned on to how he was doing it, because suddenly it became easier, unpeeling from a second place. The next volley of spells broke through. The wailing sound faltered and fell silent, and a ragged cheer took its place.

Eyes open again, he ran forwards with the rest of the first wave. Lucius above them was shouting for the second wave to advance. The plan was ruined. All they could hope now was to use their superior numbers to full advantage.

The Order had not been sitting idly in the meantime. They had managed to unseal a door and now a stream of them flooded out to meet the advancing Death Eaters. 'Reseal the exits!' someone Marked up to Lucius, but Severus had no time to see if it was done, because the two sides were now close enough to start fighting in earnest. A moment later, he was in combat with a middle-aged wizard in orange robes.

Time passed in a blur. He was only vaguely aware of wider events. He could hear Bellatrix screaming the Killing Curse, despite the plan to wound. But most of his attention was on his immediate opponent. They duelled fast and furiously. The Order wizard was on the back foot, forced to defend, but nevertheless he held his own. Severus tried again and again to disarm him or slash him, and time and again he was blocked.

Another wizard appeared as if from nowhere, and almost got him with a hex. Severus shielded, and suddenly he was the hunted, forced to fight two at once. It took all of his skill to keep himself protected, never mind return any spells. Breathless, he spun and dodged, his wand almost a blur as he duelled both at once.

There was a yell and from nowhere a man flew into his field of vision, crashing into one of his opponents. Quick as lightning, Severus darted away, pursued by the second man. They locked into close combat, eye to eye, wandtips almost hitting each other as they fought. Severus mustered all his thoughts, focussed as hard as he could, trying to see the spells forming in the other man's mind. It gave him a split second advantage, and enabled him to pre-empt two clever moves on the other's part.

Finally he sensed a chink in the armour. His opponent threw a powerful hex at him, and rather than shielding, Severus ducked. Overreached, the wizard stumbled and faltered. His eyes widened as Severus' curse hit him square under the chin, and when he hit the ground he did not get up again. 'Expelliarmus!' Severus managed to catch the wand, and snapped it, dropping the halves, still joined by a translucent strand of unicorn hair, onto the grass.

Now he could take in the broader picture again. Death Eaters and Order members duelled all around him. His heart quickened at the sight of his sworn enemies, James Potter and Sirius Black, duelling back to back. He looked around frantically for Lily. He glimpsed red hair, and his heart swooped, but it belonged to a man. He was fighting a group of five Death Eaters, along with another redhead who could only be his brother.

Unable to see her among the fighters, he ran among the fallen, trying to spot her. He saw a Death Eater with gaping wounds and performed a hasty healing charm. An Order member nearby was stirring, and he took a moment to throw the wand by her side as far away as he could. But of Lily there was no sign.

A jet of red light missed him by inches and he shielded hastily, looking for the source. He realised it was coming from an upstairs window. The defenders had made a hole, in both the glass and the sealing spell, and were trying to pick off fighters one by one. But the Death Eaters were winning. He saw Potter on the ground, bending over an unconscious or injured Black and felt a pang of some emotion. Was it horror or victory? He couldn't even tell anymore.

'We need to get inside, we need to get inside! Unseal the door!' That was Bellatrix, in between taking potshots at the bodies on the grass.

'Get them up, get the fallen Death Eaters up!' instructed Lucius, swooping overhead. Rookwood was some distance off, directing the last pocket of fighting at the other end of the building.

'Unseal the door!' Bellatrix's response was screamed out loud, and accompanied by a curse that hit a felled Order member. Blood flew high into the air.

'Get the fallen up!' Lucius had come lower. 'The Ministry will be coming, we need to get as many out alive as we can!'

Two things happened. Just as Rookwood Marked, 'Door unsealed in three-two-one,' a series of spells shot from the upper right window of the house, arcing high above the fighters and hitting Lucius. Malfoy fell immediately, dropping from the sky in a flurry of robes.

The rest of the first wave were already racing for the door. Severus threw himself behind the edge of the barn to avoid another spell and lashed out with his wand, managing to break Lucius' fall before the latter hit the ground. At the edge of his field of vision, he saw James Potter, glasses askew and face covered in blood. He was on his knees, staring appalled at the doorway where Bellatrix and several others were slipping inside. 'Avada Kedavra!' screamed Bella, disappearing through the door illuminated by a green light.

Potter's mouthed a word, reaching out with both arms as though he could stop the Death Eaters by willpower alone. Severus didn't need to hear to know whose name was on Potter's bloodied lips. He began to run towards the house, desperately trying to locate Lucius with his Mark. He could feel his friend was still there, and prayed he wasn't badly hurt. He'd sworn not to leave him, but Lily... The door of the house was already closing, he only had seconds. There was no time to think, no time to choose.

He threw himself at the door and narrowly made it inside. It slammed behind him, and he found himself in the midst of a fierce battle. The combatants were in ridiculously close quarters in the limited space. He brandished his wand, then simply gave the man in front of him a hearty shove. He fought defensively, automatically, all the time trying to see where Lily might be. A Death Eater fell to the left of him. He pushed back the two Order members responsible through a doorway, slamming the door after them and sealing it. A group of fighters chased along the hallway and disappeared through another door.

But where was Lily? He couldn't see her, and that scared him. The chimneys were still blocked and the anti-apparition jinx in place, so she couldn't have escaped. Why wasn't she in the thick of the fighting, where she'd surely want to be? The crowd in the hall had thinned out and he could see better. Some had fallen, others had moved further into the house. He stumbled on a woman sprawled on the flagstones, and heard a snap of bones in her hand. Nauseated, he fell against the wall.

A Death Eater, one of Bellatrix's squad, was disappearing up the stairs in a flurry of robes. Severus saw what he thought was a glimpse of red hair as a head drew back from above the landing banister. There were several shouts from above. His Mark burned and Lucius' voice informed them, 'Retreat! The anti-apparition jinx is lifted! Get out of here!' But there was no time to feel relief, as he was pushing his way to the stairs.

Across the hall, there was a screech of triumph, and he turned to see a man crumpling to the ground, eyes glazed. Bellatrix was already looking round for fresh prey, eyes alighting on the stairs. Severus stepped forwards. 'I'll take the stairs, I think there are more hiding out back!' he yelled, pointing down the hallway as he mounted the steps.

Mercifully she did as he suggested, and ran off down the hall. From above, someone screamed. His feet were moving straight away towards the sound, before his conscious brain had fully processed it. He stumbled up the stairs and saw a Death Eater on the landing, a red number A6 on his back. A body lay at the top of the steps. Lily was in a doorway, blocking it. Her hands clung to the frame on either side. There was no sign of her wand. The Death Eater was laughing, taking his time as he raised his wand.

The red jet of Severus' stunning spell hit the Death Eater on the back of the head. The man or woman slackened and fell forwards, Lily squealing and stepping back to avoid being hit. Her wide eyes found the source of the spell, and she stayed frozen, staring at Severus. She made a little noise in the back of her throat. 'The anti-apparation jinx has been lifted,' he said, without moving.

She remained still, then suddenly crumpled to the floor. He cried out, thinking she'd been hit, but a second later she was standing upright again, now holding her wand in a trembling hand. 'Why?' she started to ask.

'Go!' he choked, hearing footsteps behind him. He began to ascend the stairs again, and that spurred her into motion. She backed into the room, and seemed to be bending over something. Why the hell wasn't she getting straight out of there? 'The jinx is lifted, go!' he hissed, not daring to speak any louder.

She turned back to him, and now she was holding something. Something large and irregular in shape, both heavy and delicate. He realised in a horrible moment of clarity that it was a baby. A big baby, dressed in an androgynous navy blue garment. It turned towards him, and Lily's green eyes stared from within a podgy white face. Lily brandished her wand. 'Thank you,' she said, before turning and disapparating.

Severus gripped the bannister so tightly that his knuckles showed white. Lily had had a baby. Potter's baby. The existence of the child sickened him. But something else was nagging in his mind, a building wall of horror that threatened to engulf him. A baby, born at the end of July. Born to parents who'd thrice defied Voldemort. Few people had defied Voldemort three times and survived to procreate, never mind a couple who had both done so.

But Lily and James Potter had. And there was a baby. He shut his eyes to try and stop the world spinning. All thoughts of the fight, of the danger he was in, were driven out of his mind. The instruction to pull out echoed through his head again, but it might as well have been in Greek. He was frantically trying to work out how old that baby had looked, to find some piece of evidence that would disprove the awfulness of the theory that had occurred to him.

There was nothing to contradict it. And he knew, he just knew, that it was true. Because it was too typical of his wretched life and luck not to be true. The baby the prophecy spoke of was Lily's. It was only a matter of time before Voldemort found out, and killed her. And Voldemort would do so because Severus Snape had told him to. It was too much to take in.

He never heard the feet on the stairs. His legs folded underneath him as the curse hit. Even then he felt no sense of urgency. He was still too shocked. There was a shout and a thump behind him, and a moment later he was being hauled to his feet. His legs were still useless, but the iron grip of his assailant kept him upright. His head was still spinning in a way that had nothing to do with the charm. It was all over, in every sense. He had destroyed her, he had destroyed himself. He was finished.

The painful, dizzying sense of apparation overtook Severus' distress for a few seconds, but as he emerged with a thump on the expensive carpet of Lucius' hallway, the horror of what he'd done hit him afresh. He'd as good as killed Lily! Lily, whom he'd sworn to protect. Lily, whom he'd die for in a heartbeat. Somehow, some awful twisted circumstance had led him to sign her death warrant. He would have laughed at the irony if it hadn't been so utterly terrible.

He was aware of the pile of the carpet pressing into his cheek, and Lucius' voice above him repeating his name in increasingly panicked tones. Bile sloshed through his digestive tract, as every bit of his body seemed to convulse in repellence at what he'd done. He kept his eyes tight shut, as though he could block out the truth. He held his breath, he clenched his fists, he writhed on the ground, but the torment was deep inside. There could be no escape from the source of this pain. Eventually he lay, spent and hollow, trembling with emotion, feeling as though he'd never move again.

The voices of his friends reached him as though from a great distance.

'Do you think we should take him to St Mungo's?' That was Lucius, and close by. He must be kneeling next to him.

'Are you out of your mind?' Narcissa, standing over them.

'We could make up some story...'

'Don't be so bloody stupid. Get out of the way.' A moment later, a pair of fingers with sharp nails slipped under Severus' chin and pressed against his neck for a few seconds. 'He's got a pulse. Levitate him upstairs, put him to bed, and let him sleep it off. It will probably wear off.'

He wasn't sure which Malfoy levitated him to bed, though judging by how often his head banged the wall it was probably Narcissa. But he barely noticed. None of it mattered. There was no space in his mind for anything but the enormity of what he'd just realised.

He went over things again and again in his mind. The dates. Born at the end of July; so conceived at the end of October. He hadn't seen Lily during that time, so he could neither confirm nor deny the dates. Lily had married Potter in September... so a honeymoon baby then, almost. How typical of Potter, of his charmed life. Had the baby been the right size? How big was a nearly-one-year-old? He thought of Draco, who was a couple of months older, and his heart sank. Yes, Draco was a similar size.

Why did Lily have to go and have a baby? With Potter of all people? How could she? This was her fault, her fault for being so stupid. Who went and had a baby in the middle of a war? Couldn't she and Potter have abstained at least while they were at risk of death on a daily basis? He thought of the way they'd always been touching each other in public, and a sick anger kindled in his stomach. For a second he could believe that Lily deserved everything she'd got.

Then he remembered his own actions, how his only thoughts before passing the information to Voldemort had been for himself. He recalled his smile of relief when his master vowed to kill the boy and didn't decide to shoot the messenger as well. Of course, he knew Lily didn't deserve to die. She was kind, through and through. That blasted baby would be the most loved, treasured , lucky child in the world. It was a typical thing for Lily to do. Just when other more cynical souls were deciding not to get pregnant, she would have seen only the hope and joy of a new life.

If only he'd thought twice about passing on that prophecy! Why hadn't he thought of the possibility of it meaning Lily? What was the point of her being constantly in his mind if at the crucial time he didn't put two and two together? What a fool he'd been. If he hadn't been so stupid... He could have kept quiet about the prophecy. Voldemort would never have found out. When the time came, he could have saved both her and the boy, and she would have been twice as grateful.

Instead Voldemort would never rest until the child was found and eliminated, along with its parents and anyone else who happened to get in the way. There had to be a way to stop him from doing that. Severus began running through plans in his mind, each more ridiculous than the last. Could he pretend he'd misheard the prophecy? Tell the Dark Lord he'd fabricated it completely? He dismissed them as hopeless - Voldemort would know he was lying.

Maybe he should pretend to remember some other crucial detail of the prophecy, something he'd not mentioned, that would rule out Lily's son. 'And his eyes will be the darkest shade of brown...' or something of the sort? No. Voldemort wasn't stupid.

He wished again that he had a time turner. He suddenly remembered Lily, fourteen years old, stretched out on the grass and saying authoritatively, 'Time turners don't work that way.' She was right, of course. But if only they did! Of all the things in his life that he'd ever wanted to go back and change, he wished for this one so hard that his whole body ached with the effort. Surely if it was possible to wish something into being, he would succeed. No one could feel more of a burning, consuming desire for something. He would do anything, literally anything, to undo the harm he'd inadvertently done. But there was nothing that he could do! Nothing.

Unless... He remembered Voldemort's promise to him, that he would give Severus any woman that he desired. Would the Dark Lord make good that promise? He would not spare the baby, of course not, but Lily... Lily would be sad, he supposed, about the baby. But she could have another baby, couldn't she?

That was it. When the time came, and Voldemort began to actively hunt the Potters, he would beg for Lily's life. And maybe, just maybe, Voldemort would agree. Of course, he might just as easily kill Severus for admitting an attraction to a Muggleborn, but that was a risk that would have to be taken.

He began to feel a little better as he worked through the possibilities. It was light, and he got out of bed, pleased to find his legs were working fine again. Narcissa had been right about the effect of the curse wearing off. He made his way down the stairs to the morning room. Narcissa was already up, and was sitting at the table with baby Draco on her knee, spooning some sort of mush into his mouth. Severus paused, watching them. Yes, Draco did look a similar size to the child Lily had been holding. His white arms and legs were equally plump, his hair similarly fine and soft. But the grey eyes that turned to stare at him were the icy grey of Lucius', rather than green.

Narcissa followed her son's gaze, and she looked up in surprise. 'Oh, it's you. You've recovered then.'

'Yes, thank you,' he replied, entering the room and sitting at the table opposite her. 'I don't think it was anything serious.'

'I told Lucius so,' she sniffed, spooning up some more goo. 'He was all for taking you to St Mungo's.'

'That wouldn't have been necessary. Talking of St Mungo's, I ought to go soon. My shift starts mid-morning.' He glanced at the clock.

'Have some breakfast first,' suggested Narcissa, clicking her fingers. Dobby appeared beside her. 'Go and fetch Severus some breakfast, Dobby. And I'll have another cup of tea and half a grapefruit.'

The elf vanished, leaving Draco reaching out towards where it had been, fat starfish hands opening and closing on thin air. A trail of food ran from his mouth. Apparently in his fascination he'd forgotten to swallow. Severus suppressed a shudder. Narcissa batted her son's hands away and wiped his chin with an expert hand. 'No, not the elf, Draco. Nasty. Germy.'

'Is Draco... is he a normal size for his age?' asked Severus, trying to make it sound like a casual enquiry.

Narcissa's eyes narrowed immediately. 'What do you mean? Of course he's a normal size. What sort of a question is that? You don't think... you don't think there's something wrong with him?' A note of fear crept into her defensive tone.

'No, not at all,' Severus hastily reassured her. 'I don't know anything about babies, and I wouldn't be able to tell anything by looking at him. I was just... curious.'

He was saved from explaining any more by the arrival of Lucius, resplendent in a peacock blue dressing gown and jewelled purple slippers. He greeted Severus with an unusual degree of effusiveness, and bombarded him with extensive questions about his health. 'You gave me a scare, old thing,' he confessed, once he was finally satisfied that Severus was all right. 'What happened? I barely managed to get you out in time.'

Severus shrugged. 'It was just a duel, I got caught by a spell. Even I have my limits. Thanks for coming in for me.' Despite their deal, if he was honest, Severus had never assumed Lucius would actually keep to it.

'I said I wouldn't leave you,' said Lucius with a shrug of his own. 'When you didn't confirm you'd heard the order to retreat, I used your Mark to locate you. You should have seen me! I ran right through the remains of the battle and got into the house. Someone grabbed my leg but I stunned them,' he made a slashing movement with his wand arm, acting out his moment of glory. 'Then I saw some Order type on the stairs, coming right at me. He cast some sort of curse, and I shielded. It bounced off and hit him right between the eyes! Then I ran up and found you, and apparated us out just as the Ministry's cavalry arrived on the scene!' He finished his story, flushed and pleased with himself.

Narcissa made an impatient noise. 'You talk about all this as though it's some sort of... of game! Some piece of fun. Well, you weren't looking so pleased with yourself last night, Lucius Malfoy, when he was gibbering on the hearthrug and you thought he might not make it. You'd do well to think about that, when you're next planning one of your little escapades.'

'I don't think of it as a game,' snapped Lucius. 'But it's rare that I have to take part in anything like that, I can't remember the last time...'

'You were part of it this time,' interrupted Narcissa. 'It only needs to go wrong once, Lucius. The fact you have less practice than the rest isn't in your favour. 'Rare' isn't rare enough.'

'What would have me do, Cissy? I can hardly decline to participate.'

Narcissa stood up, lifting the baby with her. 'I know that. But you could at least pretend to take it seriously.' She swept out of the room, Draco peering back at them over her shoulder.

Lucius sighed heavily. 'Sorry about that. She hasn't been the same since she had the baby. Well, you know how it is with women and babies.'

Severus didn't know how it was, but he felt a sinking sensation at Lucius' words all the same. After all, he'd just condemned the child of the woman he loved to death.