Harry Potter and the Book of Magical Maladies

Harry Potter and the Book of Magical Maladies

CHAPTER 3 - Daydreams

---

Harry woke with a start. A dull, throbbing pain was coming from his scar. He unconsciously rubbed it as he looked out the window.It was dark, but the faint glow of the sun could be seen as the sunrise approached.

Harry was confused. He'd had a dream.He thought the practice he was doing would prevent such things. Still, the pain was much less than he remembered from previous dreams, and yet it felt more real, almost like the dream on the Astronomy Tower.

He stood up and walked around his room. His confusion was overriding his exhaustion, and the dull pain only made it easier to wake up instead of trying to get back to sleep. His thoughts eventually focused on the dream again. He knew it was not an ordinary dream. He also was beginning to think that the Occlumency wasn't working out as well as he had hoped.

He tried remembering the dream, and it came back to him in surprising detail. He'd been waiting for Voldemort to make a move, but nothing had happened. Now, he'd had a dream with Voldemort planning something. Where did the dream come from? Was it from Voldemort, or was it simply his imagination supplying him with what he had been expecting for the last month?

He ran his hand through his hair and stared at Hedwig.Hedwig hooted at him, and inched closer to the door of the cage.

"I see," he said. "You want me to tell Dumbledore."

Hedwig hooted in response.

"What if it's like the last one? He used me, and Sirius died," Harry said in a tone much louder than he had planned. While the Dursleys were mostly ignoring him, he wasn't sure if Vernon would stand for his nephew engaging in an argument with an owl.

Hedwig simply stared at him.

"Well? How do I know it's real?" he asked in a more frustrated, and much quieter voice. "What if he's just trying to trick me? Will Dumbledore believe me?If he does, what happens if it's all just a lie?"

Hedwig stood her ground, and hooted back.

Harry sighed. "Right then, but I'm not going to write to Dumbledore." He rummaged through his trunk to find some better parchment, and began writing a letter.

I've had another dream with Voldemort in it. I don't know if it's a real dream, or a trick, or just my imagination, but it seemed different than the others. It seemed more real. I don't want to make anyone panic until I know it's real.

Anyway, in it Voldemort was talking to Bellatrix Lestrange. I didn't hear much before I woke up, but I think it was a short conversation. He said something would be starting soon. But he didn't say what.

He also knew I could hear him.

I don't know if it's even real. Let me know what you think. Should I tell someone? Send your response back with Hedwig

Harry

As Harry waited for a response, he tried to find some task to occupy his time. He tried reading. He reorganized his trunk, and then moved on to try and tidy up his room. Eventually, he sat on the floor by his bed and practiced clearing his mind. He discovered that it was difficult to get the image of Voldemort out of his mind. He kept hearing the words echoing in his head. Whatever he was planning was starting soon. He worked to ignore it, until he had pushed it from his mind, even if only temporarily.

In an effort to try and take his mind from the dream, he did something that would have made Hermione proud: He took out the new Potions text and started reading it. He had to admit that there were some interesting things that could be done with potions as he skimmed through the book. There was a potion which would enhance your eyesight, one which would prevent you from floating in water, and another that would put a hippogriff to sleep on contact. There were also a host of other potions for which Harry could think of very few situations which would require their use. He couldn't imagine ever wanting to grow horns on his knees and elbows, or needing to not see the color yellow, although he did think that Draco might look quite fetching in iridescent scales.

He eventually gave up on Potions, and instead found his broom and cleaning kit, and spent a couple of hours cleaning it as completely as he could. It certainly didn't need it, but Harry preferred the monotonous job of adjusting the twigs of his broom to thinking about the dream he'd had.

He wished that he could still get the Daily Prophet. Even if it was mostly filled with misinformation, it would pass the time, and Harry had too much time on his hands. He wondered if he could get Ron or the twins to owl old copies to him.They sent him other things. It shouldn't be any different.

When all the sticks were adjusted, he went about polishing and fixing the smallest scratch or dent he could find. He had realized that the Firebolt was one of the few things he had from Sirius. He almost didn't want to ever ride it again for fear that some accident might damage it.

Harry's thoughts were interrupted by tapping at the window, it was Hedwig. He immediately let her in, and allowed her to grab a snack and retreat to her cage after dropping a page from a catalogue showing the season's new fashions.He searched the floor for his Obscuring Orb. When he found it he touched the crystal to the page, and it suddenly became a piece of parchment with his name written in Hermione's handwriting.

Harry,

Ron and I both read your letter, but Ron told me to write the response.

We both think this could be something very serious. It might be nothing, but you shouldn't ignore it. We all know that he must be planning something. If we know it's going to start soon we can be prepared for whatever it is.

As important as the information might be, you shouldn't even be having those dreams. This is why Dumbledore wanted you to continue with the Occlumency. You really shouldn't neglect it like this. Even if he can't possess you, he might be able to do other things.

Finally, despite Ron's accusations of betrayal, I have already told Moody and Lupin about this. The adults have said that they will trust us, and we promised not to keep anything which sounded important from them. I am supposed to tell you that if you get any more dreams you are to report them immediately to either Moody or Lupin. These are serious times, and we really shouldn't keep anything from the Order.

Love, Hermione and Ron

Scrawled across the bottom of the note in messy handwriting was a note from Ron:

She's serious, mate. I didn't want to tell Moody, but she wouldn't listen. She can be scary when she wants to be.

After Harry finished the letter he sat silently on his bed. He clutched the letter in one hand and ran the other through his hair. His previous anxiety was turning into annoyance. He hadn't honestly believed that they would keep this a secret, but he was getting angry at the thought of yet another summer spent at the Dursleys' while everyone at Grimmauld Place kept him in the dark.

He couldn't do that. It hadn't worked last year, and he wasn't going to wait and see what horrible results it might have this year.Well, he thought, at least this time I have a good idea of what's coming. He didn't know how to stop it, or even how to fight it. He couldn't even fight the dream he'd had.

He thought back to the dream and remembered Hermione's comment about not practicing Occlumency. He had been practicing. He thought he was actually doing quite well.

No, he told himself, something was different. In the dreams before he'd felt like he was the one doing everything. He'd been the snake that attacked Arthur. In this one he felt like he was there, but separate. He tried to remember what it felt like: the odd feeling he had when it started, a tugging, stretching feeling, and then the detached feeling he had throughout the dream, like he was watching his own life on a television.

He remembered the aching of his scar, and the feeling as if he were being restrained and forced to watch. He remembered the smile on Bellatrix's face and could almost feel the hatred in Voldemort's voice. He tried to remember more. There had to be more than what he remembered. Maybe if he cleared his mind he could remember something that might help him figure out what they had planned.

As he let go of all his thoughts, he focused on the dream. At first there was nothing. Then, slowly, hazy images started forming in his mind, as if he was reliving the dream. The haze cleared to show a cloaked figure walking. It must have been Voldemort, since other cloaked figures were bowing and looking down as he passed. The image dissolved, leaving Harry feeling lost and disoriented for a while. He tried even harder to remember and finally a series of images flashed before him: a dark stone hallway, a dim room cluttered with books and wizards, and a group of cloaked figures holding down an old man who cried out and fell limp as one of them hit him with a curse. Harry tried to hold onto the image and he heard a frustrated yell from one of the Death Eaters, but then it too faded.

Harry saw a Death Eater. He recognized him. It was Nott. He said something, but it sounded like he was under water. He was losing focus. Harry thought he could make out the words, "We haven't found it" and another word that had to be "Hogwarts". That meant he still had time.He tried to hear more, but the image faded.

He tried to recover it, but instead he started seeing other things. He saw a body huddled in the corner of a dark, damp cell, then Dementors walking out of a forest. The images started coming faster: an eagle-owl flying, a cauldron boiling, and wizards walking down a path. He forced himself to relax as more things flashed through his mind: a black wand, torches burning, an old book burning in a fireplace, and a hissing serpent. Suddenly, snakelike eyes flashed in his mind, and his scar exploded with pain.

As Harry's muscles spasmed in reaction to the pain, he lost his concentration and the dream faded from his mind. The pain faded as well, leaving him drowsy and numb. He felt triumphant at his success in mastering his own memories, but at the same time very worried and excessively tired. The dream had been longer than he remembered. He had forgotten most of it.

He had been made to forget most of it.

That was the difference. He was being controlled. He knew it. He tried to get up and walk to his desk, but as soon as he stood, his head swam and his legs turned to jelly. He dropped limply to the floor, breathing as if he'd just run a marathon. He decided --only somewhat willingly-- that he'd rest there for a spell.

Harry remained on the floor for some time. Exhaustion overcame him, and he slept uneasily, unable to get those serpentine eyes out of is dreams. He awoke that evening to pounding on his door.

"Boy!" Vernon yelled. "Dinner!"

"Just put it by the door," Harry croaked. "I've got a lot to do."

Vernon returned later and carried a meager plate of food and some water into Harry's room, muttering, "I don't know why you have so much to do, Dudley doesn't have anything to do." He set the food down near where Harry was sitting and writing on some parchment. "Don't you lot take holidays?"

Harry looked at the plate of food. If he would have come down for dinner he would have been able to get more to eat, but he needed answers more than food. "Most of us do, yeah," he replied.

"Oh, I see. And you're different than the rest, are you?"

Harry's hand drifted to his scar, and he thought of the day he'd had.

"Yeah," he said quietly, "I guess I am."

Vernon grunted and walked out the door.

Harry continued writing. He was trying to write down everything he could remember seeing.He still didn't know who he was going to send it to. It sounded like Moody and Lupin were in charge of Grimmauld Place and the Order. Where was Dumbledore? Part of him would have preferred to tell Dumbledore about his dreams, but Hermione had told him to tell Lupin or Moody if he had any more visions.

He decided not to tell them that he remembered all of these things afterward. He'd just pretend that he hadn't told Hermione everything. He also left out the end of the dream, and the fact that he had been forced to forget everything.

As he finished the note, he addressed it to Remus Lupin. There was something about Moody that made lying to him very uncomfortable. Perhaps he's a Legilimens, Harry thought. Perhaps he'd just been an Auror for too long. Lupin was safer.

He tapped the parchment with the Obscuring Orb. Colors appeared and mixed eventually forming a photo of a family standing under a metal bridge, with a note in the corner: 'The bananas were great!'. With a frown and an uncertain glance, Harry set it aside.

He wanted to write to Ron and Hermione and tell them everything. He even got out fresh parchment and started writing, but he forced himself to stop. Hermione had been clear. She'd tell Lupin and Moody. It would be no different than Harry writing the letter directly to them.

He started thinking of who else he knew who would listen to him as he paced his room. He couldn't write to anyone outside the Order, not about this. None of the adults would keep this quiet, and he needed to be able to think about this before he told everyone else. The twins would keep it a secret, but would they be able to answer the questions he had?

He flopped down on his bed. It was useless. No one would have any idea how to answer his questions.

That wasn't true. There was someone. And they would probably keep it a secret as well. She was perhaps the the only person who might be both able and willing to answer his questions. Would she tell the Order? He'd just have to take the chance. He took out some parchment and a quill and began writing:

Ginny,

I'm not sure how to say this. I need a very important favor from you. It's probably unfair to even ask, and you may not want to do it, but I don't know who else can help me.

If you are willing to help me, please don't let anyone else read this. If anyone asks what this is about, tell them that it's about Quidditch or the D.A. or something. I'd rather you destroy this letter without reading it than let anyone other than you read it.

I had a dream last night. I told Ron and Hermione about it. I'm sending Lupin a note about a bunch of details I remembered from it. I didn't tell him that I didn't remember those details until this afternoon.

After I read Hermione's response, I tried to see if I remembered anything more. It took a bit of work, but I did. I assume they'll tell you, though they don't know that I didn't remember it originally.

I'm worried. I didn't know it happened.I don't remember dreaming what I saw later. The feeling I got when I was dreaming. I felt held or trapped, I couldn't leave or stop it.

I need to know something. And perhaps more. I need to know if you were able to fight Tom Riddle when he possessed you.I know you said you don't remember doing anything, but in the moment before he had control, could you fight him?

The worst part is that I'm still having these dreams. Hermione told me I shouldn't have given up on Occlumency, but that's the problem. I haven't. I've been practicing twice a day since your father first came here. I've been able to block other things, but not the dreams. The next time this happens, I'm going to try to fight back.

I need you to keep this a secret. I know what Moody said, and I know what Hermione will say. You're the only person I can talk to about this. It's not because I want to keep secrets from the Order. I'll tell them whatever I find out. I just know that if I tell them now, I'll never get any answers about what is happening to me.

Harry

Even after he had Obscured the parchment (to a Muggle brochure for the Bahamas), Harry was questioning the wisdom of sending the letter. Would Ginny keep this a secret? If she did, how much trouble would she be in if anyone found out?

Harry paused as he struggled with himself. It really wasn't fair. What was she supposed to do? He'd given her a choice of betraying him or the Order. Harry thought of the crush she used to have on him. There were no answers there. She'd gotten over it. She'd had no troubles standing up to him when they left for the Department of Mysteries.

Harry closed his eyes as he remembered that day. His nightmares had long since mixed with reality, but he remembered how Ginny had stood with him in front of the Death Eaters. She'll do it he said to himself. Part of him felt guilty, but a greater part wanted the answers that the Order would not give him.

With a deep breath and deliberate steps, he walked to Hedwig, and handed her the two letters. He held up the brochure. "I'm expecting responses to both of these, so stick around until they write them. This one is for Ginny. Deliver hers first, and pick up her response last. And try to avoid anyone else before it's delivered."

Harry had finished his meal and was already bored with Potions of Power when Hedwig arrived at Grimmauld Place.

Everyone was just getting ready for another late dinner. The mood was somewhat more serious than normal, but that didn't stop the twins from showing some of their latest inventions to Mundungus Fletcher. The news from Harry earlier that day had reminded them of the inevitable future, and had brought a number of extra visitors. Bill was even there, and the addition of Fleur by his side was no longer remarkable.

Molly Weasley was tending a stew and some fresh bread.Ron and Hermione had just set the table and were sitting next to each other at one end of the table, across from Ginny and Tonks. Arthur, Lupin, Moody and Kingsley Shacklebolt sat at the other end, discussing things in quiet tones.

As owls go, Hedwig was exceptional. Not only was she quick, but she understood and actually followed Harry's instructions whenever he gave them to her. However, there are times when even the best owls cannot fulfill their owners wishes.

Hedwig flew into Grimmauld Place through a window in the parlor left open specifically for the owls which ran messages to both Hogwarts and Little Whinging. She headed directly for the kitchen, despite the situation.

Nearly everyone noticed the snowy owl fly directly to the table. Hedwig dropped the brochure directly in Ginny's lap, and then turned and landed directly in front of Remus Lupin, with the photo on the table in front of her.

Ron, Hermione and Tonks all looked with surprise at Ginny, as she reached into a pocket and pulled out her Obscuring Orb.

"That's from Harry?" Ron asked.

"I don't know," Ginny responded with a shrug. "Who else would use Hedwig?"

She touched the Orb to the brochure and Harry's letter appeared. With her confusion evident, she began reading. "Yes, it's from Harry. I guess they both are."

Remus spoke up. "This one is indeed from Harry. Tonks, you'll want to read this. Molly, too." Tonks got up and immediately joined the group reading over Lupin's shoulder.

Ginny was reading the letter intently and jumped as Ron turned back toward her and tried to peer at the letter.

"Well, what did he write?" he asked.

"He needs a favor," she replied distractedly.

"A favor? What kind of favor?"

Ginny froze, looked up at her brother and then around the room. She'd just reached the part where Harry asked to not let anyone read the letter. She didn't know what else it contained just yet, but she knew that it couldn't have arrived at a worse time.Instead of answering, she stood and stepped back from the table.

"Ginny? What favor?" Ron was standing as well now.

"He says... er... He wants me to..." she stammered trying to respond and read more of the letter at the same time.

Ron started walking toward her. "How about I just read it for myself, and save us both the time it takes you to try and get over the fact that Harry needs a favor from you?"

"No!" she said a little too forcefully. She was still reading the letter as she came up with an explanation. "He wants me to keep training as a reserve Seeker for the Quidditch team. He said he wants to make sure he has a backup."

The others were just finishing reading the other letter. Molly noticed Ginny standing with her letter from Harry.

"Ginny, what's that about?" Molly asked.

Ginny suddenly realized what Harry had asked her to do. Keeping things from Ron was easy. She'd been doing that for years. Lying to her parents was different, and now she wouldn't be able to get out of this without lying to everyone. Part of her wanted to do what she'd agreed to, and to tell Lupin.Another part of her remembered waking up in the Chamber of Secrets and seeing Harry. She owed him much more than what he was asking.

"Just Quidditch stuff. Harry wants me to be the reserve Seeker," she said as calmly as she could. She walked past Moody towards the fireplace where the stew was bubbling.Her mind was replaying the words from the letter: "I'd rather you destroy this letter without reading it than anyone other than you read it."

Moody turned to look at her suspiciously. "Quidditch?" he growled. "He sent a warning about Lord Voldemort's plans along with Quidditch advice?"

Ginny turned her back to the others and began stirring the stew with the same hand which held the letter.

"What are you doing over there?" Molly asked.

"Stirring the stew," she said as if it were obvious. The note was folded several times, but she wasn't sure if that would stop Moody's eye from reading it. It couldn't hurt and it would be easier to dispose of.

"There's nothing else in the letter? No news about the dream?"

"No. I thought he already told Hermione all about it." She twisted to look at Hermione, keeping the letter behind her. "What's Hedwig still here for? It looks like Harry wants a response."

"So it does, Miss Weasley. Remus, I assume you'll want to do that?"

Lupin got some parchment and started writing a response, but Molly stopped him. "It's late enough. Dinner first. Let Hedwig rest a while.Now clear off these papers."

Everyone finished preparing for dinner. Molly took the stew and brought it to the table. Ginny took the bread. As she passed by the fireplace, a folded piece of parchment fell from her hand and burned silently.

Dinner was quick and everyone was eager to discuss what Harry had told them. Ginny tried to sneak off when the discussion started. She read the other letter and knew everything she needed to.

"Could we see your letter, Miss Weasley?" Moody asked as he saw her leaving.

She gave him a surprised look. "I threw it in the fire."

"Why did you do that?" Arthur asked.

"Tonks said we were supposed to destroy any letters from another Order member."

"That's right, but you said it only about Quidditch," Moody growled as his eye shifted back and forth at her.

"Harry wrote it," she replied slowly. She was infuriated by Moody searching her for the letter. "And I don't have it, so you can quit looking. If you wanted it you should have asked for it sooner," she snapped.

"Very well, Miss Weasley," Moody said with a smile that looked more menacing than cheerful. "I would like to see any letters you get from Harry Potter."

"Fine," Ginny said with a scowl before turning and walking out of the room. As she walked up the stairs she could hear Moody still talking.

"That girl has been spending far too much time around Bill and the twins," he said loud enough to ensure she could still hear him.

Ginny sat down immediately and began writing as quickly as she could. She wasn't sure if anyone would notice if Hedwig was delayed or if anyone would come looking to talk to her. She knew that if anyone knew what she was about to do, it would probably be her last night at Grimmauld Place.

As her quill scratched across the parchment again and again, she was filled with a strange feeling of excitement. Her pulse quickened and at the same time she was beginning to get nervous and paranoid. It reminded her of the feeling she got in the Department of Mysteries as she was being chased by Death Eaters.

Did Harry feel like this whenever he was doing all the things he did? It was both frightening and intoxicating. The excitement was invigorating, and yet she was afraid of the chain of events she might be starting. She pushed the fears aside with thoughts of Harry. He had done so much, protected so many people without anyone to protect him.

She didn't understand where the thought came from, but when the moment came to decide whether to follow through with her plan, her only thought was of helping Harry.She would deal with the Order if they found out.

With grim determination she handed the letter (now disguised as directions to a party in Exeter) to Hedwig. She opened the window and Hedwig was on her way with only a few graceful strokes of her snowy wings.

Not long afterward, there was a knock at Ginny's door. Hermione's head poked in.

"Have you seen Hedwig recently?"

"Hedwig?" Ginny asked, looking up from the book she was reading. "Didn't Lupin send a message back to Harry with her?"

"Yes, he did," Hermione replied, "but I thought I just saw her leaving."

"Maybe you saw Icarus?" Ginny offered. "It is quite dark."

"Perhaps."

Hermione gave Ginny a strange look, then closed the door.